Iconic

They have a kid. The kid is doing all of the hockey camps and all of the kids’ leagues as soon as they can stand on the ice. They’re raised from a baby to be an NHL/PWHL star, since it’s literally in their blood.

One day, the Hollanovling sits their parents down in a very Shane Hollander “we need to talk” manner.

“I don’t want to do hockey,” they tell their dads.

And for a moment, Shane Hollander and Ilya Rozanov are speechless. What do you mean their child, the child of two of the best (if not the best) NHL players ever, doesn’t want to play hockey? Do they not like it? Do they feel pressured?

The Hollanovling senses they aren’t getting a response, so they slide a thick, black spiral-bound book across the table.

In it are gorgeous pieces of art. There are collages and paintings and sketches and various mixed-media pieces and maybe even a few lines of poetry.

Shane Hollander and Ilya Rozanov raise an artist.

Its a very emotional affair and shane is there to console his husband through the emotions of having these photos that will prevent him from forgetting what she looks like, and he's SO grateful to svetlana for being able to give this to ilya but also.

His brother does.

His brother calls him, forgetting that Ilya went no-contact with him. Ilya's silent on the phone, listening to Alexei's wife softly explain it to him and take the phone.

He texts Ilya, asking when where he is. Asking who he's playing next game.

Ilya's been retired for over 20 years.

He knows Shane wants to say something, but he never does. He's just quietly supportive.

One day, it's Alexei's wife that calls him. She apologizes for calling. She tells him Alexei doesn't remember her anymore. Or their daughter. He only asks about Ilya and their parents. She offers to delete Ilya's number from his phone.

Ilya declines.

After that, he starts answering the phone. And talking.

Alexei asks where he is. Ilya tells him he's coming home soon. That seems to make Alexei happy.

Alexei asks who Ilya is playing. Ilya says Montreal. Alexei tells him to win or papa will be angry.

Alexei tells him mama made him soup. Ilya tells him that was his daughter. Alexei laughs, he doesn't have a daughter.

He doesn't remember how cruel he was to Ilya. He doesn't remember how much he loved drugs and drinking.

He was so much like Ilya's Alexei, before he started taking after their father. Before he let his anger at their mother consume him. Before he caught Ilya and Sasha and allowed his fear for his little brother to turn into anger and disgust.

One day Ilya offers his wife, Natalia, to have them visit. Their daughter has visited more than once, even stayed with them for a summer after high school. His and Shane's kids tried to teach her hockey.

Natalia regretfully tells him Alexei is not well enough to travel.

Ilya can't travel to them, not while he's married to Shane.

But their phone calls are enough.

About once a week, he gets to speak to a version of his brother than he had dearly missed. He gets to talk about his mama like she's still live, not dead for over 50 years. He gets to talk about the rink he and Alexei used to play hockey at. To talk about the stray cat he and Alexei once hid in their bedroom for a week.

He finds himself looking forward to the phone calls.

The real kicker comes the first time they spend a night apart. Shane has been booked for a photoshoot that requires him to stay overnight. It shouldn't be a big deal. It's one night. They've spent countless nights apart before.

However, it's nearing 2 AM and Shane still can't fall asleep. There's no deep breathing that boarders on snores filling the room, no one snatching the blankets from him, no cloying warmth of a furnace disguised as a 220 pound hockey player forcing him to stick his feet from under the blanket in an attempt not to overheat. It's awful. It shouldn't be this difficult. They spent years in a long-distance relationship, Shane wishing every night for Ilya's presence. He should be able to do this. But never before has he felt his absence this keenly.