I don't know what I'm thinking

coming up with an au were a dead character lives but shaking my head while i do it so everyone watching knows i support the role their death played in the narrative and consider it a legitimate writing choice

Every time i purchase a moderately expensive item the Karl Marx on my shoulder is like "For shame... you purchase yet another pair of jeans when you have 5 already at home, you despicable commodity fetishist? In my time, a man with five outfits would consider himself blessed beyond measure, and yet you want for more, while there are children starving in the world??" to which the second Karl Marx on my other shoulder says "Objection! Those 5 pairs of jeans all wildly uncomfortable or have holes in the ass, due to the decline of clothing quality driven by the fast fashion industry, unfortunately making this purchase a necessity... Plus, by purchasing a slightly more expensive pair of jeans from an independent brand, seeking quality over 'brand recognition', they are deliberately trying to avoid engaging in conspicuous consumption!" to which the third Karl Marx clinging to my back like that beetle from Doctor Who says "Remember, my friend; the less you eat, drink, buy books, go to the theatre or to balls, or to the pub, and the less you think, love, theorize, sing, paint, fence, etc., the more you will be able to save and the greater will become your treasure which neither moth nor rust will corrupt — your capital. Buy the jeans," to which I say "I don't know if any of you have actually read Karl Marx"

Harry Du Bois is that you???

Jungkook just called. He said we have to end climate change now.

Reading hitchikers guide for the first time was really funny because it was like ohhhh THIS the writing that every unfunny nerd has been trying to emulate from like ‘00-‘12 . But good.

stoner horsegirl who refers to smoking weed as "hittin' the hay"

I know everyone says it’s best to just stick to “said” as a dialogue tag bc it disappears and that’s true and I mostly do but I want to take a moment for my all-time favorite dialogue tag, “lied.” Absolutely nothing hits like “‘I’m here to help,’ he lied.” NOTHING.

with reddit and twitter imploding, Tumblr Staff sees this as a golden opportunity to "sieze the moment" and roll out changes so awful that everyone here wishes it was a viable option to jump platforms

Staff stop making me reblog this every two weeks challenge

I didn’t miss that social cue I just thought it was stupid 

Back like one hundred years ago cave women woild have to kill shit with their teeth. And their pussy out. They were also like twenty feet tall and psychic.

call me the tumblr app the way i continue to get worse