The Perfect AB/DL Diaper Check: A step-by-step guide
So you’re a caregiver, and it’s been a few hours since you’ve last changed your little’s diaper, so you know it’s time for a check! But how do you perform the most humiliating, blushy, little wrigging diaper check to make sure you skyrocket your little into littlespace with a helpful acronym.
D - Distraction: If you’re going to perform this expert-level caregiver maneuver, you need to begin with a distraction. Littles are easily occupied, so this could just be introducing a new toy, giving them their bottle or paci, or even telling them to look in the direction you want them to while you get your hands up close and personal with their diaper.
I - Initiate: This is where many caregivers would normally stop, but this is just the beginning for us! This is where you perform your normal diaper check procedure, by patting the front to feel for the warmth of little pee-pees, checking the leg cuffs with your fingers for saturation, and peeling back the rear side of the diaper to look for stinkies. You’re going to know if they need a change or not by this point, but if they’ve had an accident in their diapees, you’ll process through the next steps.
A - Apply Force: Now we’re getting to the fun part. Applying force is all about mushing that tush and squishing that padding! By applying force to their diaper, it’s assuring them that you know you’ve found something stinky in their pants, and they have no choice but to feel it themselves.
P - Pander: Its not enough to let them feel their messy diaper, now they need to hear all about it! Dawdle over them with phrases such as “gosh baby, I can’t believe you soaked your diaper and didn’t even know it!” Or “oh yeah, I knew from the second I walked over here that’s where that smell was coming from, it’s so stinky!” We’re really trying to up the blush factor here, so don’t skimp on the details.
E - Embelish: Now that they know that you know their diaper is saturated, it’s time that you know that they know that you know how to push all the right buttons (you know?). To embelish the diaper check, you need overexagerate what you’re doing. You can do this by saying “you must have fit an ocean’s worth of pee-pee in your diaper!” Or “I think I’m going to run out of wipes cleaning this dirty bum” to make this dirty diaper seem more daunting than any other they’ve had before.
R - Restrain: We’re not done poking and prodding this diaper just yet, but in order to move onto the next part, we need to hold this little one down. Either push them over a couch, lean them over your lap, or if you really want to go all out, tie them face-down to a bed or couch, so that you have unrestricted access to their diaper area.
C - Chastise: You know what’s better than a humiliating diaper check? Blush-inducing spankies! Now, we’re not trying to punish, but by chastise, we just want to drive home an element of dominance by applying some heavy force to the dirty diaper. A couple slaps with the hand or an implement will do just fine to bring our little stinker over the edge of helplessness.
H - Hugging: Okay, we’ve hit them with a little fire, now we want to go full-on sweet for the next step. After they have been chastised, bring them into your lap and hold them tight, but make sure you’re still touching their diaper, either by patting it or by bouncing the little on your knee to continue to make them really feel the dirty diaper. Lay a little love on them, because they’re about to get really vulnerable, really fast.
E - Expose: Time to let them know that they’re in for a diaper change right now! At this point, they’re probably ready for it, but by exposing this fact to them, you’re letting them know you decide that it’s time for a fresh diaper, not them. Not only that, but you’ve also exposed their need for you to change them, and nothing will make a little feel subby sooner than guiding them by hand to the changing table as they waddle to their designated spot for their diapers.
C - Clean: We’ve had a lot of fun here today, but now it’s time to get to business. Now they they are on the changing table, go through you’re regular diaper changing routine with them, but don’t forget to emphasize how saturated their diaper is, since we are going the extra mile here. Once they’re all clean, put their clean diaper on them and give it a good rub, letting them know how much better feeling (and smelling) their fresh diaper is now that you’ve changed them.
K - Kissies: Remember, as caregivers we do these things out of love for our littles, and as littles we let our caregivers do these things to us because we know they love us. End it all with a big kiss on their pacifier and a raspberry on their belly, and bring them back to where they were playing so that they can get back to important little business until the next time they need their diaper changes, which probably won’t be too much later based on how many accidents they have!
What is the most important part of a diaper check to you? What do you like to do to your little? What do you want your caregiver to do to you?
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