i’ll never be

Can we all go back to the fact that Jean has been down bad for Jeremy since he was like 15? There’s just something about 15 year old Jean staring at a photo of Jeremy’s smiling face while he’s broken and beaten and searching for the light. Then years down the road, he’s staring at a picture of Jeremy’s smiling face again but this time he’s next to him in the picture. Jeremy’s wrapped around him and the picture is hanging on their refrigerator. And it’s not just a picture now, but a memory he has for himself. Jeremy’s smile isn’t just a dream now, it’s a reality that lives in his home and kisses his mouth and calls his name sweetly.

Jeremy making a video that’s like “walking with my scary dog privilege” and turning the camera toward Jean. But every time he turns the camera toward Jean Jean blushes and smiles at him

i need some post-canon andreil fic recs…. i don’t care how far post-canon it is, how long or or short. as long as it’s canon compliant PLEASE!!!

A little thing I headcannon is that Andrew never asks where Neil is. Neil is CONSTANTLY asking where Andrew is if he hasn’t seen him for approximately 0.5 seconds and even Jean notices how they give “lingering looks when one fell out of orbit for too long”, but Andrew never asks, wanting conceal to the others how much Neil is a weak spot for him. Instead, his eyes slide across the room, scanning, and if he can’t see Neil then Andrew simply gets up and goes in search of him, he knows all of his spots anyways. The foxes, initially just put Andrew’s abrupt leave up to his blatantly disrespectful self, deciding he wasn’t interested enough in the conversation, so they don’t really care. However, that isn’t until they notice the pattern. First, Renee, then Dan and Aaron, and soon the others catch on. They observe the way Andrew’s fingers start tapping at his sides when his head swivels round and cannot find his specific ginger. They observe the way he gets up immediately and strides towards the door. They also observe the way Andrew hands still slightly as Matt says, “he’s on a run” or Kevin tells him Neil’s just practicing on the court. Andrew doesn’t acknowledge it openly of course, he never asked and would’ve been able to find him himself easily, but they all don’t miss the way his head lowers for a second, giving a subtle nod, placated by the fact someone always knows where Neil is. I guess they all know the alternative, when his hands were shaking, wrapped round Kevin’s neck in Baltimore. He didn’t ask, “Where’s Neil?”, he screamed it. And the others didn’t know. And Andrew couldn’t find him.

TKM is one of the funniest aftg books because neil is actively getting hunted for sport the entire time and instead of caring about that he’s just meddling in other people’s lives and playing therapist for 400 pages: telling kevin to start living for himself & and forcing the twins to go to therapy together & passing jean’s number on to renee so that she can talk to him. and it WORKS too. the field of psychology lost its best mind when neil decided to go pro w/ exy

the first time Andrew lets Neil rest his hand on his chest, Neil freezes. there’s a heartbeat beneath his fingers—faint, almost imperceptible, not enough to fully feel, but it’s there. and Neil just… stares at his own hand over Andrew’s t-shirt, afraid to move, allowing himself only the smallest shifts of his fingers, the lightest, barely-there squeeze. “Can I… move a little?” he asks very quietly, like he’s afraid to break something fragile. Andrew nods. carefully, Neil shifts his hand just slightly to the side, until suddenly, there it is. a steady, unmistakable heartbeat under his palm. his blue eyes lift for a second, meeting Andrew’s—and he feels it pick up, just a little faster. and then he doesn’t get to say anything about it, because Andrew cuts him off with a kiss, like he can’t stand the thought of Neil noticing just how openly his heart is giving him away.

Imagine never once picturing yourself in something as ordinary as a relationship or domestic life, and then suddenly you’re Andrew Minyard, stopping by a pet store on your way home from practice to buy food for your two cats while your partner cooks dinner waiting for you to get back. and then you’re Neil Josten, waking up early in the morning, rolling over beneath the blankets only to find a blond man standing in the doorway with a towel slung low around his hips and damp hair still dripping from the shower, casually asking, “You want coffee?” and then you don't understand how your life has turned out this way, but you're definitely happy.

the rooftop is freezing. they’ve only been out there for fifteen minutes, but it’s already enough for the cold to start settling into Neil’s skin. he shifts his weight from one foot to the other behind Andrew, watching the broad line of his back where he leans against the railing, completely unaware of Neil stepping closer. a second later, Neil moves in behind him and presses his lips to the back of Andrew’s neck. the sudden chill of them makes Andrew straighten slightly. “What was that?” he asks without taking his eyes off the street below. “My lips got cold,” Neil murmurs against his skin, not even pulling away as he speaks. goosebumps rise faintly across Andrew’s arms at the contrast between Neil’s cold mouth and the night air around them. “Go back inside,” Andrew says. all he gets in return is a quiet little hum that vibrates warmly against his neck. after a while, Neil wraps one arm around Andrew’s waist and pulls himself closer while bracing his other hand against the railing beside him, keeping them both at a safe distance near the edge. his lips begin to move slowly along the back of Andrew’s neck, searching for warmer skin, and each soft touch sends another small shiver down Andrew’s spine. “Is this really necessary?” Andrew asks, not even noticing the way his eyelids have started to droop. “This warms them up faster,” Neil whispers, still unwilling to move away. eventually he settles in one spot, hiding the cold tip of his nose against Andrew’s neck. his grip around Andrew’s waist tightens slightly—a silent invitation, and Andrew shifts back into him without protest. warmth slowly spreads through his body as Neil’s breath brushes against his skin, and, annoyingly enough, Andrew can’t argue with the fact that it’s actually working.

Jean is still asleep, curled in on himself with his arms drawn protectively over his body, like he’s waiting for a sudden hit the way he used to in the Nest. one night, after they’ve started sharing a room, Jeremy notices the way Jean sleeps. he watches him for a while, staring at the tense, guarded posture, until one simple thought slips into his head: Jean must be cold. so Jeremy quietly climbs out of his own bed and pads over, catching the edge of the blanket before it can slide to the floor, already ready to drape it over Jean. but then Jean suddenly shifts in his sleep, curling tighter instead of relaxing—arms bent closer to his face like he’s bracing for a blow. Jeremy freezes. his eyes widen slightly in confusion before he carefully reaches for one of Jean’s wrists, trying to ease his arm down gently. Jean’s sleepy, equally confused gaze finally blinks open to meet his, clearly waiting for an explanation. Jeremy just looks at him for a few seconds, trying to figure out whether Jean understands what’s happening. then, quietly: “Can I come in?” the moment stretches for another few seconds before Jean’s expression slowly settles back into its usual distant melancholy. finally, he shifts aside just enough to make room for Jeremy beside him. Jean is already turning away again when Jeremy moves first, settling himself slightly higher and pulling Jean against his chest instead, tucking the top of his dark head beneath his chin. his fingers slip into Jean’s messy curls while he presses a warm, familiar kiss to the crown of his head. “Is this okay?” he whispers. at Jean’s quiet approval, Jeremy relaxes fully, continuing to comb his fingers gently through his curls, never quite moving his lips away from Jean’s hair until he eventually falls asleep himself. Jean stays awake a little longer. long enough to realize the position they’ve ended up in. the steady warmth of Jeremy’s chest beneath his cheek. the weight of an arm draped protectively over him. the slow rise and fall of breathing against his body. It eases something tight inside him. slowly, Jean gives in and rests his own hand against Jeremy’s waist, burying himself closer against the soft sweetness of his scent.

before one of their sessions, Andrew and Bee stop by a coffee shop to grab something warm. while they’re waiting for their drinks, Betsy says she’ll step away for a minute and heads to the restroom, leaving Andrew by the counter. he’s halfway lost in his thoughts when the barista’s voice pulls him back. “Sorry, does your mom want her cocoa lighter or more rich?” for a second, Andrew doesn’t even register that the question is meant for him. he just looks at her as she hovers over the powder, waiting. eventually he snaps back, already knowing Betsy’s preferences after all those sessions. “Lighter,” he says evenly. “Rich for me. Thanks.” he doesn’t say a word to Betsy his mom about the mix-up when she comes back. but he does catch the look the barista gives them when she hands over the cups, something unmistakable in it: What a caring son. Such a sweet relationship with his mom.

Today Jeremy will upload a tiktok with the caption: "In your early 20s you will get a call from a friend asking if you're willing to take a Raven defensemen for your Exy team. It is very important that you say yes" and the next picture is Jerejean wedding