Damn Dude

Can we please stop making scary shark movies? Sharks are pure sweet babies that don’t deserve this slander. They just have bad eyesight. Don’t be mean to them.

Someone in my city is currently having sex, giving birth, and dying.

That person needs to slow the fuck down

self care is drinking 3 pots of coffee and getting into a knife fight w god

its so amazing that i live in a year where the sentence “be careful while going out and catching pokemon or the clowns might get you!” is valid

It most certainly does.

In honor of Lord Byron’s birthday I would like to remind you all of the time that Shelley and Keats, having not heard from him for some time, became concerned for his safety and it was determined that Shelley would go looking for him. Keats received a letter some time later that Shelley had found him in Venice, where he’d been having so much sex that he’d nearly died from malnourishment and dehydration. Keats’ entire response amounted to essentially, “You should probably have let him.”

“I found him, he’s in a gutter.” “Well go put him back”

There are million dollar blockbuster movies that were less entertaining than the rollercoaster this post just took me on. 

@memefck shut up

Make me

Ok blocked

Thats rude, dont be rude

@memefck shut up

Make me

this just in; seamus’ voice has the power to make you go to sleep

leave my voice alone 

i love ur voice so