*// you wanna make a memory

“Yeah she definitely needs help but we both know she’s not gonna get it.” It seemed like a pessimistic thought but Devon had known Kalani long enough to know the truth. He loved Kal, always would, always would care for her and hoped for the best. But he knew that she didn’t feel the same about him. She loved him, yes, but it was a sick and twisted kind of love, the kind that only wanted him to be hers or in her orbit, which usually meant him being at his worst. She didn’t care about his addiction, she only cared that he fit into her world which would always include alcohol and drugs and the type of bad company that had landed him in prison in the first place. But he was grateful for the kiss, the chance to forget it all and just stay in this little world with her for a little longer. “Hey I’m just glad you asked for my help. You know me, I like to be as useful as possible. It’s gonna be amazing, Mel, and everyone who comes through here, near and far, will feel all the love and warmth in this place. We’re gonna have the best grand opening.” He leaned in to kiss her again before peppering a few kisses along her jaw. “Thank you for giving me a chance,” he added, knowing that since he had gotten out he hadn’t been able to find anything nearly as stable as this job or as well paying, definitely not anything that would have enabled him to move as soon as he did. “You really saved my life here, changed it. You always have a knack for doing that.”

An easy smile came to Melody’s face as she listened to him, something that seemed to happen all too often when she was around Devon. It had always been that way and it was both strange and wonderful how they had been able to fall back into things so naturally over 20 years after they had last seen each other. “You don’t need to thank me, Devon. I trust you, you know that, and if I was going to have anybody build this thing up with me, it would be you. Besides, someone needed to give you a second chance. I know it’s been hard to get your life situated again after everything... Just know that you could work here long-term, if you wanted. You could work maintenance. Be the on-staff handyman. You’d be paid well, but you already know that,” she offered with a smile. “You can think about it, but let me know, okay? I’d love to have you here with me full-time.”

Brooks: I do be having stories

Brooks: Mostly about how many times I've been bit by a duck but they are still valid stories

Melody: I... genuinely want to know how that is possible so now I'm intrigued

He knew already he was never going to do that. It wasn’t personal, he just… talking about it was the same as reliving it, and he couldn’t do it. He wasn’t strong enough to do it. “Maybe… I love him, I always will. But hope hasn’t done me so well. It’s just a case of gathering up what strength I have and knocking on that door. Don’t… don’t tell me about him. I have to least give him that chance”. 

“Don’t worry, I won’t say anything. The last thing I want to do is take away that moment from you.” Making her way over to Caleb, she pulled him in for another hug. “Let me know how it goes, okay? Good or bad. I’ll be here for you either way. But for now... Should probably get you back before it gets too late. Will you be able to find your way back or should I call you a Lyft?”

Perhaps he had pushed it, but he was so tired. Everything was going to shit, and he didn’t know what to do at this stage. What did it matter what she thought of him, she had made her feelings clear a long time ago. It wasn’t like he could say it to Di, he didn’t even know where she was or if he’d see her again. Perhaps he should have just never remarried again, remained a widow for the rest of his life. But he’d fallen in love, it had all felt so natural. Love seemed to be lifes biggest lie. “Too late, much too late” how could he accept it now. He had wanted it back then, thought he could move on if he heard it. He wasn’t so naive anymore. “I don’t, you know that. You made the decision all those years ago, I’m just being true to it”.

Melody stopped in her tracks, her back still facing Rowan as he spoke. She wasn’t sure what possessed her to say something again, but she turned to face him, the frustration clear on her face. “You know what? No. I don’t accept that. If you want to hold onto this grudge for the rest of your life, then that’s your prerogative, but I’m not going to give you the power to tear me down over a decision I made when I was 17 years old. We’ve clearly both lived good lives since then, so you acting like I ruined your life by breaking up with you is really childish. The last few years I’ve been living in my own personal hell, so the last thing I need right now is for you to throw all of your pent up anger at me and then refuse to let me do anything to fix it. I know a lost cause when I see one, so just know I’m not going to lose any sleep over you deciding to be an obstinate asshole over a teenage heartbreak.” And with her final piece said, Melody stalked off down the road, gripping tightly to her purse to prevent her hands from shaking. Whether that was from sadness or anger, she really couldn’t tell anymore.

“Hang on, now you’re hiring more” he joked with a smile. “Sounds like The Guesthouse is going to be in safe hands though. Hiring people is never too hard, just depends on where you look” and he’d always taken practically anyone in. After all, he knew how hard it could be to get back on your feet. There had been a time he had almost begged for work. “Sounds pretty enchanting if you came back. Me? Oh believe me, you wouldn’t have noticed me if we had. I was the weird quiet kid back in those days. But no, moved here with my daughter about twelve years ago. House prices here were a bit more affordable, and Annas was on the cheap as the last owner had run it into the ground”.

“You see, that’s my problem! I get brainstorming and then things multiply. It’s probably just me trying to keep myself busy,” she replied with a laugh and a matching smile came to her lips at his words. “Thank you. I hope so, but we’ll see going forward. I know Edens isn’t necessarily a tourist destination, but maybe with the town cleanup, there may be a few more than back in the day.” Biting her lip, she shrugged. “I don’t know if I’d say enchanting, but... it’s where my parents still live and I think I needed to be close to them right now while I’m going through a transition period in my life. A lot of my old friends are still here, too, so that’s been nice.” She nodded as she listened to him, smiling at his story. “Well, it looks like you certainly turned the place around. Did you always plan on owning a restaurant or was it more of a ‘why not?’ situation? I definitely never saw myself owning a B&B, but the opportunity presented itself and it was an offer I couldn’t really turn down.”

“Of course it was, that man was a model without even trying. Handsome as fuck, totally unfair.” Ella was pretty secure in her sexuality but she had always accepted how fluid it could be. Still, there was only her high school boyfriend and Beau who she had ever been intimate with and Beau had been far more unexpected. Her high school boyfriend had been more of a beard than a boyfriend. Beau though, she had loved him, fallen in love with him without a doubt. He just had a way about him and the way he looked at her, the way he welcomed her into his and Melody’s life. She could still remember the way she would blush whenever those deep, soulful eyes would look into hers. Like he could see her truth without even trying. God did she hate the universe for taking him away. What a beautiful thing it would have been to have him here now. To fall asleep between him and Melody once again. It was a dream she would never want to wake up from. 

She nodded in understanding, knowing that after his passing and after losing Chris, she had a hard time having their pictures around. She had one with Beau and Melody that hung on her wall and the one with Chris had sat on her nightstand up until his funeral, when she had thrown it against the wall in anger. Now it sat in her drawer, waiting for when she was ready for it to be pulled back out. “I’d say take it one by one, yanno? Put a few up first, see how they make you feel. You don’t have to do it all at once. Maybe at first in places you don’t pass by daily, then places you do and see how it feels.” 

Her eyebrows knitted together at Mel’s words and she shook her head. “Who the fuck is upset with you? I will throw hands, De La Rosa, straight up, I learned a lot back in New York.” She was partly teasing but she wouldn’t hesitate to come to Melody’s defense and it pained her to think that anyone would be giving her a hard time. “It’s been..hard being here but right now, I couldn’t be more happy to be home,” she admitted, not afraid of feeling vulnerable with her. She spun Melody around slowly, pulling her back so the older woman’s back was against her and she wrapped her arms around her waist as they danced. “If Beau was here, he’d walk in and be like,” she stopped and cleared her throat to bring about her best imitation, “Mira, what kind of trouble are you two getting into hm? Dancing without an invite to me? In my own house?” She laughed softly after she said it, holding Mel a little closer as she pressed her lips to her cheek. “He loved you so much,” she added, pressing another kiss. “You are so loved, Melody.”

“I’ll do that, yeah.” Melody smiled, already trying to imagine spots around the living room she could nestle picture frames she’d carefully wrapped with pictures of her and Beau. Shaking her head, Melody let a sigh leave her. “People I hurt before I left. Some are justified in their pain, others... they were upset with me on behalf of the people they care about, so I can’t fault them either. It may have been a long time ago, but I didn’t handle a situation the best way I could have and I guess that hurt is still lingering and some people are more forgiving than others. It’s okay. I’ll handle it one way or another.” It wasn’t that she didn’t want to dwell on it, but she didn’t want to drag Ella into her problems when she already had so many things on her plate with her sisters.

The two swayed together in the center of the room, moving along to the mid-tempo beat and she allowed herself a few moments to be transported back to their place in New York, years ago when the three of them had been together, imagining the words Ella said coming from the man himself and a smile came to her lips. “Definitely sounds like him,” she replied, her voice soft as she opened her eyes to look at Ella again. She was so grateful to have someone there, someone who knew Beau and could reminisce with her in a way that no one else could. In a way, it helped to keep his memory alive, even if it was painful at times to recall all of the good and then remember everything she had lost when he passed. “I know I’ve said it before, but Beau would be so proud of the woman you’ve become. I know you said you’ve got some things to figure out still, but you’re more sure of yourself and being true to you. That’s all he ever wanted for you.”

          “He blames himself for what happened, for lettin’ me there alone when I asked him to be, so I’m makin’ sure that he doesn’t. It was no one’s fault,” she said in assurance, maybe to herself because it was difficult not wanting to place the blame on something else— on something greater than herself. “It’s settled then, I’ll let him know that I’m spendin’ some days with you, he might miss all the cookin’ I’m doin’, but it will be nice to spend some time with another girl for a change… way too much testosterone,” her nose wrinkled as she chuckled. She observed as Melody moved effortlessly around her office, she had been doing some great work around her— she and Devon both had, and she knew as all business owners did, they only hoped it would attract more tourists to boost the town’s economy. “Same, I love the winter and cold weathers are great of the bakery, but I’ve been missin’ the sun way too much,” and the change of the season to warmer weather would quite possibly make her feel better, it would be the end of it a dark time in her life. “I’ve been feelin’ fine, sleep is another matter altogether. Nightmares and a whole lot of insomnia, my doctor prescribed me some sleepin’ pills, but I’m kinda scared to take them,” she shook her head at how childish she sounded. “What about you? Ella told me somethin’ about bein’ Beau’s anniversary? How are you dealin’?”

Melody laughed some at Anna’s words, nodding as they made their way out of the building and down the sidewalks towards the harbor. “I get that. It’s nice having someone who cares, but sometimes it can get overwhelming and you need a change.” She’d certainly felt that way when she’d returned to New York for Beau’s funeral, all of their friends insisting on bringing her food and cleaning up around the apartment for her so she wouldn’t have to cook or clean for herself and practically taking away all of the things she could use for a distraction from her grief. She knew they were doing it out of love, but it still made it difficult to accept it when all she wanted was to be left alone to process the loss. “Maybe you don’t have to jump to the sleeping pills right away. You could try melatonin and see if that helps? It’s supposed to just help with whatever amount you already have in your system, just give it a boost to help you fall asleep. If that doesn’t work, though, definitely take them. Not sleeping’s going to cause a lot more problems in the long run.” Her smile fell some and she shrugged, shifting the strap of her purse on her shoulder some. “It’s... difficult. Every day here’s really a reminder of what I’ve lost because I know I wouldn’t have come back if he were still here, but... I’m hoping he’ll still be with me in a way once I’ve finished unpacking all of his stuff and put it around the house. I’ve got good people here to help me through, though, Ella being one of them. I’m grateful to her and Caleb for helping me get through those few days around the anniversary.”

“It was a beautiful picture, the one you posted.” Ella could still feel the impression of her lips on her cheek, just taking a moment to watch Melody walking around the room. Ever since she had said all of her feelings out loud to Anna, it was starting to hit her how many of her feelings lingered when it came to Mel. Maybe it was because the older woman had taught her so much, about life, about love, about being a compassionate person. Maybe it was all the emotions running high, the absence of Beau, the craving for familiarity. Or maybe it was what it was, that she still loved her, as much as the first time she had said it to her all those years ago in New York. But since the end of her engagement, she felt like her heart was a mess, like she’d never figure out how to give parts of her heart again, but she supposed Melody had always had a part of hers. 

She took a few sips of her wine before setting her glass down, brushing her finger lightly on top of some of the boxes. “I think kind of everywhere around would be good instead of like a one room shrine, you know? I think he would be a fan of a good aesthetic choice.” She glanced at the record player before smiling over at Melody, holding out her hand for her, “Just like he would definitely think we should dance to this song. It’s far too good to pass up.” Her smiled widened as she took her hand and pulled her forward, sliding a hand to her waist, “I missed you, you know. Gotta admit I’m starting to get used to having you around again.”

"It was always one of my favorites. A friend of ours back home took it. Can you believe it was a candid?” Melody laughed, shaking her head. She had always been amazed at how at ease Beau always seemed to be in front of the camera, how effortlessly handsome and charming he was. She knew she wasn’t the only one to have felt it, especially since Ella had fallen for him and she hadn’t been with many men before or since then. He was special in a way not many were and she was grateful to have at least one person in Edens Town who could share in his memory with her.

“That’s what I was thinking. It’s just... difficult figuring out what goes where. Pictures and all that, y’know? Of course I can move them later if I change my mind, but it’s getting past the stage of just staring at all of them instead of doing anything with them that’s the hard part.” As the song changed and Ella extended her hand to pull Melody in for a dance, she couldn’t help the soft smile that played on her lips as she easily moved into her, her free hand resting on the other woman’s shoulder. “I missed you, too. I’m glad we’re both here. I honestly wasn’t sure if you were here or if you’d be in New York when I made the decision to move back, but... Even with everything that’s happening, I’m glad you’re still here. It’s probably been the best part about this homecoming thus far. Most everyone else I had some connection with here seems to be upset with me for something.”

              “YEAH, I know,” Jay agreed, nodding. It really seemed, in the grand scheme of things, that he was managing to cope with this better than most that he’d spoken to. If there was anyone in this entire scenario that he was putting first, it was his kids - he knew this was a lot to handle for an adult, never mind the five and ten year olds caught in the crossfire. He’d considered Aria’s position on everything, too - but in knowing that she was old enough to at least comprehend it, Grace and Cole had come first. “The last thing I wanna do is even feel like I’m takin’ any of this for granted, you know? It’s a second chance that people just… Don’t get.” He added, shaking his head softly. A small smile spread across his lips at her words, “Thanks, Melody,” He started, pausing to think about it, “I think that would actually be a great idea. Gives everyone a little bit of space, y’know?”

"Yeah? I think it could be good, too. And maybe it could give Cole a bit of time to decompress, maybe even talk to me about what he’s feeling? Someone he won’t feel like he’s disappointing if his answer isn’t necessarily what they want to hear.” Feelings were complex as it is and when someone so young was feeling something so intensely and wasn’t sure how to communicate it, there was always the possibility for it to build up and turn into unwanted behavior. She didn’t know if Cole was the type to lash out at all, but if there was anything she could do to help, she was going to do her best. “You let me know when, okay? My schedule’s flexible right now. Most of the big work is done at the B&B and they could both join me at our little theatre rehearsals if it falls on one of those days. We have snacks and there’s another boy maybe a year or two younger than Cole’s age there he could play with.”

Brooks: I'm definitely going to try to convince you, it would be fun!

Brooks: That works... I GUESS.

Brooks: Perrrrfect. Sleepover time. Then you can spend all night telling me alllll about what you've been up to recently. 😘

Melody: It better work! You know I love you dearly

“I’ll remember that, promise” he replied, as he put his number into her phone. Well, they both knew him well enough to know that he wouldn’t. When it came to where he put other people and their problems, he always put himself last on the list. He can handle his problems, he would always much rather help others with theirs. “So do I but…” he sighed, before shaking his head. Five years was such a long time, he didn’t know how he’d believe that Jay hadn’t moved on. He couldn’t be mad over that, he wanted the man to be happy. “Ok, if it all goes to shit, then I will call you… and that didn’t sound anywhere as bad in my head”. 

Melody smiled softly at Caleb’s reassurances that he would reach out if he needed to. Although she wasn’t sure if he actually would, she could at least hold his words against him later if necessary. They were both caretakers and she knew it was hard to turn that off and let someone else take care of you in a time of need, so she would do what she could but wouldn’t push either. “Good, that’s all I can ask. But I have faith you’ll be able to work things out somehow.”

“Two still doesn’t seem that many. Not for somewhere that has to be open twenty-four-seven. I’d always say two” as for the rest, now didn’t much seem like the time to point out that Edens wasn’t really a tourist area. He might have it completely wrong afterall, he didn’t know if people came to visit or not. He’d be surprised, but really, what did he know about it? “Ah, so you were returning. Drama seems to, mine came back to… haunt isn’t the right word, surprise seems better. Just have to toll with the punches I suppose” and he always had, there hadn’t really been other options. “Sure it’ll be wonderful. Though might have to hold you to that”. 

"True, and I’d want to have someone to be at the front desk when I’m not there and then someone for housekeeping... Whoever does repairs and maintenance work. So maybe three, though I already know who the last one would be, so that’s not much of an issue.” She smiled and shook her head. “Yes, I was. I was born and raised here. Moved away for college and the hustle and bustle of New York City kept me there for a while. What about you? I feel like I’d remember you if you grew up around here.”

Devon let out a loud laugh as she said it and shook his head, “I mean you have a good point there for sure, god remember that time your dad almost caught us? I wouldn’t have known how to explain to coach that I broke my arm climbing out of my girlfriend’s window.” It was easy to ignore the world outside of those walls, easy to indulge in this moment with Mel. It felt like a breath of fresh air, like a way to forgive himself, to forgive both of them for hurting each other. They had been teenagers, and matters of the heart were never cut and dry but he had always cared for her, always loved her and always would no matter the circumstances. He knew that what she said was true, that life was complicated, and that after this little bubble of theirs was broken they’d have to face those complications and he knew that just like back then, his heart was in many places. But he was with her now and he didn’t want to be anywhere else. He let his eyes close for a moment as she traced his jaw, leaning into her touch happily. “Oh god, you’re right. You should have seen her face when Reagan told her she wanted to live with me, I thought the house was going to implode.” He shook his head and sighed. “I don’t know even know what to do when it comes to her, to be honest. She’s still..so angry at me. I don’t think she knows how to not be. But…we did not just have amazing sex to talk about my baby mama,” he joked, leaning down to kiss her again, brushing his nose against hers for a moment. “At least we know this stage will always be special, huh?”

Melody scrunched her nose some as Devon explained some of the current situation with Kalani. It didn’t sound like things had gotten any better between them to how they were back in high school and now they had the complication of needing to be in each other’s lives for their children.  “It sounds like something she needs to talk to a professional about to try and work through. It’s not fair to you to carry the weight of everything when she’s just as guilty of it. But you’re right, let’s not focus on her too much...” Leaning in, she placed a kiss to his lips, slow and lingering so she didn’t have to pull away from this moment too soon. Smiling into the kiss, she nuzzled the tip of her nose against his as she pulled away. “It will be. Christened by us and hopefully full of all the emotions it could possibly hold to help these performers sing, dance, and act their hearts out. I can’t believe everything’s come together so well... This place will be open in no time and I really do have you to thank for that. I wouldn’t have known where to start with any of this construction work.”

Brooks: NAHHH, you can do it

Brooks: Yeah, yeah, you and Dev galavanting without me

Brooks: Anytime works, I'm usually out here all weekend and then Thursday and Friday for sure

Melody: You and I are of different minds on the subject! Maybe you can convince me down the line.

Melody: You and I can gallivant without him to make up for it, how about that?

          That hug really did feel good. It was nice to see that ever since she had left the hospital, people had been treating her less and less like a porcelain doll and more like someone who had more than an ounce of strength. “Please, Hector has been acting like my father, I’m afraid that he won’t let me leave even after I’ve gotten a new place for myself,” she chuckled and shook her head. Although she was more than thankful for everything her brother had done for her, but sometimes it could be overwhelming, she was only withstanding it so far because if roles had been reversed, she would probably be mommying him more than his own mother— it would definitely be tough competition. “Maybe I can sneak out for a day or two and keep you some company and let him bring women home, what do you think?” She grinned, thinking it would definitely be nice to have girls around. “I thought we could go to the Bay? Some salty wind might do us some good and I can’t eat most seafood, but I have been craving some grilled fish.”

"He loves you. Every time I swung by the hospital, he was out there in that waiting room. I’m glad you have people like that in your corner. It’s going to really help you as you work through this time. And that sounds perfect if you ask me. I will always appreciate the company.” Though their situations weren’t similar, she knew losing someone that you loved even once upon a time was never easy and left you with conflicting feelings, let alone how she must feel for having been the one to do it. She couldn’t imagine the trauma that would come with that sort of situation. “The Bay sounds wonderful. Can’t wait until it’s warm enough to sit out on the beach with picnics.” Grabbing her coat and her purse, she riffled through the bag to find her keys so she could lock up the office and the building, making her way down the sidewalk with Anna by her side. “How are you feeling overall? Are you sleeping okay?”

He hadn’t expected her to kiss him back, knowing that there were various reasons as to why this would be complicated. But he didn’t want to lose this chance to be close to her and he decided to fully indulge himself. He let out a sigh against her lips as she deepened it, leaning into her touch as he wrapped his arms around her, eventually lifting her up by her thighs so he could carry her up the stage. He was sure she could hear his heart beating as his hands roamed her body and his lips followed, grateful that they had closed off the bed and breakfast for the next week for the rest of the renovations.

[bow chicka wow wow}

Devon was still catching his breath as they lay back on the stage and his arm stayed wrapped around her, his lips pressing to the top of her head for a moment. “Okay be honest, I’m a lot better at it now, right? I mean I haven’t had a lot of practice but…” he laughed softly, his fingers brushing along her back as he set his eyes on the ceiling.

"A lot better, but you weren’t bad back then either, old man. Think I would have stuck around that long if you were bad in bed?” Melody teased with a breathy laugh as she nuzzled into his neck some, placing a trail of gentle kisses along his jawline. It was the first time in years she’d been intimate with someone else, her and Beau not having shared their marital bed in the final two years of his life. It felt like a release in a way, like the turning of a page in this period of grief where maybe she’d be able to start taking steps towards being happy again with someone new. She knew Beau wouldn’t have wanted her to be alone, and she tried to remind herself of that every day. Shifting some so she could rest across his chest, she ran her fingers along his jawline, thumb tracing over his cheek as she looked at him. “We should probably make sure Kalani never finds out about this or she’ll come burning down all our hard work.”