*lovewreck 𝐓𝐇𝐑𝐈𝐋𝐋 / 𝑅𝐼𝒟𝐸

HONESTY HOURSend me an anonymous question and I have to answer honestly, no matter how embarrassing!

Well, for the girls I can only say my lovely Camila and Melissa, Lucy is a sweetheart as well just as Chloe. As for the lads, of course I adore Harry, my favourite curly haired boy just as Ben, KJ and the one and only Luke Hemmings.

“ feel free to call me a idiot. i’m starting to feel like a proper one after walking her in the extreme heat. ” he snorted with a shake of his head. returning the hug eagerly, he wrapped both of his arms around her smaller waist tightly — his head nuzzling in the junction of where her shoulder met her neck. pulling back after a few moments, he shoved his hands down into the pockets of his jeans. “ you’re probably confused as to why i came solo. ” he spoke up, teeth pulling harshly on his bottom lip. “ joe had to be somewhere — probably a meeting for his upcoming new show, and it was far too hot for miss frankie and mr gary. ” he hummed. the next few minutes that passed by after the last words left his mouth were silent. a plesant silence falling around them as he rocked on the heels of his sneakers. where exactly did he go from here ? how did he initiate the much needed conversation ? how would he even begin to word what he had to say ? he probably should have thought it over before he left his flat. brought out of his heavy thinking by her voice, he smiled small at her before nodding. “ i would love to sit down and have a pancake with you. it would be a great honor. ” he joked, his hand coming up to rest over his heart.

following her inside the house, he couldn’t help but let out an audible sigh of relief at the feeling of cold air hitting his heated skin. he could imagine that if this were a cartoon, he’d have those little steam lines rising off his skin by now. taking a seat down at the table, he linked his hands together and rested them on top of the table. once again, a silence fell between them and ben found himself getting restless. he needed to talk. he felt like any moment he was going to explode with unsaid words. before he could stop his wandering brain, he opened his mouth and suddenly uttered, ’ we really need to talk ’ before he could even stop it from coming out. a heat rushed over his skin and he clamped a firm hand against his slightly swollen lips. embarrassment was clearly drawn over his pale features as he leaned down to rest his forehead against the wooden table top. “ i’m so sorry. i don’t even know where that came from. ” he rambled on, head shaking. “ i sound bloody crazy don’t i ? ” he asked once he raised his head back up. “ can we just pretend i didn’t say that ? ” he pleaded. “ or we can talk. the option is all yours. ”

“I would never call you an idiot, that’s something a rude person would do and I am far from rude. So let me just call you a goofball to sugarcoat it” Melissa teased lightly as she let a soft laugh fall from her lips. She figured they both needed the long awaited embrace, instantly falling lightly into the hug as she gave his bigger frame a rub on his back. Pulling back it was if he could read her mind if he were in it, she ran her lips through her teeth any visit from Ben was always a delight but the sudden text might’ve thrown her mind to otherwise. “Only a little, but it’s always great to see you” she said softly. Listening to him she understood his husband was busy, she was actually looking forward to the show soon airing on the screen. “It’s okay, we can replace Frankie and Gary with Farley for a few hours” she said showing him the smile staining her lips. She felt a little quietness in her system, maybe it wasn’t just her’s but there was clearly something in the hair. She ran a hand through the blonde streaks of her hair. Hopefully when they were more into the moments they shared together today it would be filled with chewing of food. Maybe that would cover unspoken words? She couldn’t tell. But hearing his acceptance to her food made her nod and relieved that she wouldn’t be the only one eating today. 

nearly jumping when he heard his texting tone go off, he closed the photo album and pulled out his phone to confirm the person that he suspected of messaging him. seeing the contact name at the top had his heart jumping out of his ribcage. she had actually messaged him back. letting his eyes trail lower to check over the message that she had sent him, he bit down hard on his lower lip. she not only texted him back, but agreed to meet up with him. almost instantly he had millions of things dashing through his mind. did she also want to talk about their past ? if not, then what would they talk about ? it had been so long since he had last seen her, that he can’t even remember the last thing that they had talked about. they didn’t really interact much at his wedding — ( not that he could remember anyways, seeing as his mind entered a form of blissed out subspace after he and joe had been pronounced officially as husbands. ) and he couldn’t recollect a time before then that they had truly talked face to face about things. phone conversations were like a safe haven for them. if they were face to face, then one or the other might bring up the question of why things ended the way they did; whilst their phone conversations were more rushed and to the point due to them calling during breaks of their respected projects. shaking his head when he realised he never even texted back, he sent out a quick ’ i’d love to ! see you in a bit. ’ re-locking his phone, he placed it in the back pocket of his jeans before bidding his dogs a quick goodbye and heading out the door.

rodeo roads was quite the trek from where he was located in downtown. now that he was thinking about it, he probably should have just collared both gary and frankie and brought them along for the journey. it wasn’t like it’d be that big of a deal anyways, seeing as frankie was already somewhat familiar with the other blonde anyways, having lived with her when they were still together. but he was already too far gone to just pause and head back the other way when the thought had been entertained. as he continued on he felt the urge to just kick himself in the arse. why did he decide to walk all the way to rodeo roads during one of the hottest days of the week ? sure, he didn’t trust himself to drive on american roads seeing as he’s not familiar with them, but surely he could have caught a bus ? joe was out of the question since he had left earlier on in the day to do something. the bottom line was, there were other methods of transportation. safer methods that wouldn’t have him running the risk of having a heatstroke. stopping at the light, he waited patiently for the walking person light to flash. resting his body against the slightly rusted pole, he let out a heavy sigh. he really should have just taken a bus. this was too much, and it was in this moment he was grateful that he had opted out in bringing his poor pups with him.

finally reaching the females flat within an hour and a half of him leaving his own — ( and many breaks being taken inbetween ) he was there. reaching a slightly shaking hand up — ( either from nerves or the starting symptoms of a heatstroke, he wasn’t too sure at this point ) he rang the doorbell to alert the other of his arrival. waiting for her to come to the door was nice, because for one, it was slightly shaded, and two, he could finally take a break to collect himself before their encounter. what would they talk about ? would things be awkward between them ? how does he approach certain topics ? what if things ended up going nowhere and they just ended up tip toeing over the subject once more ? what if, what if, what if. he was sick and tired of the what if’s. he was sick of the anxiety and swirling blackness that seemed to frost over his mind whenever he got the slightest bit scared. hearing a small ’ click ’ behind the door had ben straightening his posture out of habit. seeing the smaller blonde come into view had a gentle smile blossoming over ben’s features, and the blackness faded to gray. “ hello ” he spoke up to break whatever invisible ice had settled. “ let me tell you mate, not a smart move of mine to walk all the way here. ” he joked, a breathless chuckle pushing past him as he rubbed at the back of his neck out of anxiousness.

It’s not like Melissa had anything planned for the day but seeing Ben text her really was surprisingly, expecting him to be overly planning making room for a baby into his home. But when seeing he wanted to see her really she had no words for it. Did he want to talk about something? Or did he just want to see her? Either way he wasn’t going to say no, of course she wouldn’t. She was too kind to say no, plus feeling an ounce of specialty that he did indeed want to see her out of all people. Normally it would be a feeling of naturality but this was an ex of her’s questions filled her mind of was Joe coming with him? Was he okay? Was she stupid to question even just those? She couldn’t recall the last time she had even spoken to just him alone, without congratulating him on something. They never really had conversations just the two of them in a ungodly amount of a long time, were she to blame herself for that? Her fair skin filled with guilt rubbing her lips together. Letting the summer hair brush through her blonde locks as it brung her back to reality. Melissa thought of herself as a deep person, never liking conversations of ‘how have you been’ and ‘how was your day’ she had already pictured of instantly how she would get into the nitty gritty. Would Ben even mind talking about the real and deep things? Or would she scare him off bringing in such a glimpse of the past. She inhaled sharply ready to face whatever this is, even if it was anything to face after all?

She headed insider deciding to make pancakes just in case there would be an awkward stage she could cover it up with some nice baking. As she loved her baking, being in Rodeo was sure to bring people the calm and retreat they needed. Indeed Rodeo Roads was very far away from the city life, but maybe that’s what Melissa liked about it. Plus it was very unlikely for her to bump into anyone as everyone lived more than a couple of yards away it was a natural instinct to feel peace on her end. She could’ve moved to the shores where on hot summer days a dip in the ocean would come to her easily, and the place she had moved into wasn’t any kind of summer home more cozy and collected. She expected Ben to drive so like some crazy Hollywood home she was clicked the button on her front gate for him to come in easy. Making sure Farley was inside she started her work on the pancakes, was it dumb not to text him and ask if he wanted some? And she was just going to make him some anyway? Maybe not and at least it would be a nice gesture right? Her hands slipped through the pan shaking away at the chocolate chip pancakes she had bought from the closest store days earlier and least she had a reason to use the mix. The steam flooded through, she probably looked like someone who had just gone for a work out but the loose summer clothing she had on would tell a different story. 

( @melllimarie​ )

“ i want to go to cool places with you. “

years. that’s how long it’s been since his relationship with melissa had ended. you’re probably wondering why ben was even bringing this up, what the importance of this was. and to tell you the truth, there was none. there was no real reason why he randomly thought about his past relationship. he never dwelled on a past fling before — ( not that this could accurately have been labeled as a ’ fling ’ since it was very much real to him all those years back. ) but he couldn’t help but shake the fact that there was no real closure to how things ended. it was ( fairly ) amicable. there was no shouting or pointed words being exchanged between the two of them — their breakup was more defeated than anything else. they both knew that they functioned better as mates than in any sort of romantic companionship. at the time they were basically putting metaphorical duct tape over the holes that were constantly being created. small talks and closed smiles being exchanged on the daily — hell, he even moved on the couch as to ease the awkwardness that had long sice settled into the air. it was almost painful to force themselves to do anything romantic. ’ date nights ’ were nothing like they should be. instead the whole event felt like a nice hang out between two good mates. kisses were pressed to the cheek, as they had been for a while now — the first sign of the decline, hands left lonely as they swung to the side; brushing every so often, and limbs no longer tangeled like they used to long for.

after they mutually decided to end things, he moved out and found a tiny flat of his own. rehearsals for ’ bohemian rhapsody ’ had begun around that time, and he had finally met joe. he used to call everyday, letting her know what exicting things were happening and if she could possibly swing by to visit the set. it seemed like things went back to normal — he couldn’t sense any tension between the two of them, but he had also been absorbed in his own little world at the time. as time progressed he found himself falling deeper and deeper for a certain auburn haired american, and of course he dialed the first person he thought of — anxiously asking for what to do and how to read body language. it only hit him after he started ( not so ) subtly flirting with joe, that he realised he had asked his ex for dating advice. he apologised but couldn’t help but guilty. what if came off as show offish ? like he was trying to make the other jealous — ( “ mel, he’s so BEAUTIFUL, he’s got these HAZEL eyes and this GOREGOUS AUBURN hair ! what do i do ?! ) he hadn’t mean for it to seem that way. he was just totally awestruck by the sheer beauty of the american man. his sense of humour, his gentleness, his voice. he couldn’t believe that they had never crossed paths before. soon enough he was together with the older man and then married. it was odd to think that his life had progressed that far in that short of time. he had sent her an inivte to the wedding and cried when he first saw her. there she was. crushing hugs and small pecks of the cheeks being exchanged as he gleefully cried over how perfect the day had been.

that had been a month ago now, and he and joe were expecting their first baby this month already. he lost contact with her. text messages remaining unanswered as he sat back to enjoy the simple pleasures of married life. but recently he couldn’t help but think of it when he was going through his wedding photos. it wasn’t fair. it wasn’t fair that he MET the love of his life, MARRIED the love of his life — is expecting a BABY with the LOVE OF HIS LIFE, and she had no one. pulling his phone out of his back pocket, he scrolled down the numerous texts before coming across her contact, and typing out a simple, ’ are you free to hang ? ’ before sending it. he needed closure. he needed to know that they were okay — that she was on his team like he was on hers. that no matter what, they had each other’s backs. they needed to talk about the past, about what went wrong and why neither of them brought it up. why they willingly let the other one go. don’t get ben wrong, he didn’t harbour feelings towards the other blonde. sure, he felt love and adortation, but from more of a little brother side of things. had there ever been a romantic type of love in the first place, or was it always just a convenience to be together out of fear of being alone ?

Melissa could never recall how long it had been since her and Ben dated, seemed like forever ago but still always brought a smile to her lips. Melissa never really focused on past relationships if they were terrible, let alone any of them for that matter. In Melissa’s mind they were all wonderful memories of whom she had shared a brief period of love with. Never worrying about what could’ve been or what should’ve because that was all in the past, and Melissa was more focused on the future. She had her fair share of relationships, flings, engagements even a marriage at one point. First she was married to someone and it really was a great relationship she attempted to keep private, even when she got married it never made headlines until someone noticed a ring on her left hand. She truly believed gossip and rumors could ruin everything or twist things in the wrong way, her first relationship on why they broke up had been twisted around in many ways she couldn’t explain. When it was a mutual break up, simple as that. However the difference between that kind of relationship and her one with Ben was quite different. She had never gotten real clarity on why her and Ben ended things, maybe she had her reasons and he had his but they never collided too well. It had been bugging her in the back of her mind for a while. But she knew her reason, they were very alike both kind and lovable people. Everyone could call them brother and sister which is exactly how she felt about Ben, she was too close to him as a friend rather than as a person she would want to call a significant other. 

It was easy to drift apart when they had different work spaces, Ben heading to film a brand new movie that would become a hit and Melissa heading back to Vancouver to film Supergirl. Her brand new role to become a superhero for people’s entertainment, all of what she had loved was making people happy. She knew she could easily call him and have a mutual conversation, or send him a text asking how he was that day. It was all easily considered with no heartache or regret. Coming to South Haven however was a different story, the universe bringing two friends back together was pretty awesome to Melissa’s mind. Feeling like she had entered a brand new town with a friend. Seeing Ben meet Joe should’ve brought sadness to Melissa as everyone would be down when their ex meets someone who isn’t them and falls in love. But Melissa? Not really... He had asked her for advice on how she should approach this and she was happy enough to give it to him even if she was lacking love in the life she had herself. However... She did have a shot at that, Chloe was someone who she had hooked up with finding her features and everything about the woman absolutely beautiful. She craved a love with her but had ruined it of the after effect of a hookup. Melissa had never done such things... Hookup with someone and leave them behind, continuing on with her life pretending it didn’t happen. But god did it cross her mind every single damn day. By the time she was able to process something like this, surprisingly keeping it very secret from everyone Ben had gotten married, Melissa felt awful for dealing with her own minded grief on how she let a possible love interest go instead of celebrating the love one of her best friends and ex boyfriends had. Was she jealous? No.. At least not of Ben and Joe, endless tears were shed and hugs were of course shared. But she did why she hadn’t gotten such a beautiful love the two shared.