HAPPY PLACE: Judy Truesdell
We live closer to Michigan since moving to Granger and it boggles my mind how quickly I can drive from one state into another in less than 10 minutes. I get a youthful thrill with each quick exit from what I know into what I do not. What can I say? It’s never taken much to excite me.
Judy Truesdell lives in the small town of Niles, Michigan. I found her serendipitously after chatting with her daughter, Meg, who owns a vintage shop near my home called Treasureology. I told Meg about my blog and that I was looking for women to interview. I clarified that I wasn’t looking for perfectly decorated homes like those featured in home design magazines. I further explained I need women who have created unique spaces that are difficult or impossible to recreate, spaces that tell their story. I am always looking for women who designed a space based on what is beautiful to them immune to outside influences and definitions. Meg told me about her mom’s home in Niles and I trusted her suggestion since Meg herself is such a charming, unique woman with a fun spirit.
As I drove through Niles toward Judy’s home, I got this cozy feeling that I was in a special place. Many of the homes are large, historic and in a variety of conditions. Some have been well preserved, and others have not done as well as time marched on and so did large industry. The population of Niles in 2010 was 11,600 and the last count in 2017 was 11,208. While I cannot see myself ever living in such a small community, I can appreciate the comfort of knowing your neighbors and being known as you live your life.
As soon as I approach Judy’s home, I know I am somewhere truly special. To the left of her front door on the brick facade is a small painted illustration of a similar home. The trim work, the wrought iron fence, the bright red door with gold lettering for the house number, “No. 23”… everything tells me I am entering one of those unique historic homes that make us long for a time when significantly more thought was put into the design of the American home.
Judy later explained that her home is in the Italianate style. A quick google search tells me the Italianate style home began in England inspired by Italy’s farmhouses. These homes were built of masonry and came to the United States in the 1830s. Accordingly, Judy’s home was built in the 1870s. She and her husband, Terry, purchased it in 1971 and raised their daughter, Meg, in the home while they remodeled it over the years ahead.
I got a tour of Judy’s home before we sat down to chat. Her home oozes with charm. In the partially underground basement, her husband turned a cistern into a brick surround wine cellar and dining area. Built ins, coffered ceilings, original wood flooring, oh my! This home is truly special, but my conversation with Judy far outshined this incredible home.
Judy had soft piano music playing when we sat down in her Happy Place, a sitting room in the front of the house near the entryway. She had laid out a beautiful teapot with two teacups, two hand crafted napkins and we enjoyed hot Ginger Peach tea and lavender shortbread cookies while I learned more about her story and the story of her Happy Place. Pinch me! My writing life gives me incredible experiences and this one will remain in my memory forever. What perfection on an unusually cold November day!
Married in 1967, Judy met her husband on a blind date while they were both attending colleges in Michigan. They married a year before her husband was drafted and eventually deployed to Vietnam. Both from large families, Judy explained to me that it was good for them to be away from home when they were stationed in New Jersey. They got to be in and out of New York City, DC, and Philadelphia before returning to Michigan and purchasing their historical Niles home.
When Judy first moved to Niles, the community was very different. She explained that four Fortune 500 companies resided in Niles at that time. And the executives’ “smart wives” began a culture of volunteerism and philanthropy that still exists there today. This was a time when women did not work especially wealthy women and so they became the leading volunteers who developed the Niles Service League, the Fernwood Botanical Garden, and more. Judy went on to say, “This was a really interesting time here. We went to cocktail parties with all of these interesting people!”.
In the mid-80s, Niles began seeing the departure of big industry as did so many small communities in the States. Even so, Judy loves Niles to this day. She describes it as “divine” and listed all the things she loves about it … the agriculture, the culture due to all the local colleges, and the people. The people! What I learned about Judy during our time together is that she cares more about people than anything else. It was the central theme of our conversation.
A lifelong business woman, Judy and her husband have owned several businesses including two that were inspired by their daughter. Judy’s husband designed and built a ‘cupcake tree’ for their daughter’s wedding reception. After getting such an incredible response from the wedding guests, Judy did some market research and they spent the next 17 years running this retail and wholesale business as a family. Earlier in their lives, they started a wooden swing company called Tree Play inspired by a swing set Judy’s husband made for their daughter.
Volunteerism has always been a part of Judy’s life. She just finished over 21 years on the board for Lake Michigan College. She serves on several foundation boards and volunteers at Fernwood Botanical Garden. Most impressive to me is the fact that Judy has run for State Representative for her district two times.
It was during these runs for office that Judy saw so many circumstances including abject poverty. After she mentioned the fact that her home is in a transitional neighborhood, I asked her how she feels about this and her answer gave me another taste of Judy’s genuine love of humanity. “I feel safe here. It’s a transitional neighborhood, but I feel safe! I love it.” Once a more middle-class neighborhood, she explained that the transitional nature means a lot to her. “Its mankind. I’m not hiding from it . . .” She teared up, paused and continued, “I talk to my neighbors. This neighborhood is alive!” Judy has an “urban garden” that gives her lots of opportunities to interact with the people going by and the kids on their bikes. Much like her home, Judy loves her neighborhood because of the people in it and not because of the actual, physical homes that line it.
Since it was November when I met Judy, I couldn’t help but wonder what this home would look like at Christmas. She explained, “This has always been a Christmas house!” and I couldn’t help but feel envious for anyone who gets to celebrate the holidays there and with a woman who loves people like Judy does.
When I asked Judy why the sitting room brings her so much joy, she challenged me to answer that question myself, but then said, “It’s like stepping back in time. It’s peaceful. I have never had anyone in this room who didn’t automatically let down. Just here … for right now.” What started as her “music room” and still has a piano and art work featuring musicians is now more of a social space, but also her quiet spot to “read the New York Times every Sunday.” The traditional, step back in time feel to Judy’s sitting room is central to the calmness I felt from the moment I sat down.
Judy’s love of music is seen in her piano with a book of Gershwin sheet music on it and an antique sign above that reads, “Baldwin Piano.” Peace, music and memories are the words she uses to describe her sitting room: “Everything in this room has a story!” Judy pointed to the Baldwin Piano sign and explained that she bought it for her husband for their 8th wedding anniversary at a local antique store. Their friends who were sign makers fell in love with it and asked if they could bring it with them to a convention to demonstrate the feathering technique that was used to do the gold leafing on the glass. This couple never got over the fact that they accidentally broke it in their travels to the convention. The wife glued it back together using led. When I first saw the sign, I thought that there was either a story about how it got broken or it was an intentional look. I’m glad it is the former.
Judy went on, “There’s stories everywhere. There’s security in being surrounded by things that you love.” She’s had the lady figure on her piano for 35 years and she likes it because the woman looks like her grandmother. In our throw-away society that focuses on the latest and greatest lives this woman who values the meaning behind gifts, accidents, and objects that keep us closer to those we loved and lost.
Current trends of moving every 3-5 years will mean a generation that doesn’t know the stability and comfort of a childhood home. Judy’s daughter, Meg, gets to return to the home of her childhood several times a month. When I asked Meg recently what the home means to her, she stated “It’s more home than my home.” She explained that her parents saved her childhood home from being condemned when they purchased it the year she was born and had “sledgehammer parties” with their friends as they made it what it is today. In returning, Meg enjoys the smells of her mom’s cooking and the “little menagerie of memories that pop up” when she’s there. And now her two teenage daughters get to make memories there as well.
Judy has styled her Happy Place to accommodate guests. There are chairs arranged throughout the circumference of Judy’s sitting room always ready for visitors. Judy’s space proves that you don’t need a large home to make people feel welcome. She explained that while the scale of her home has always been a challenge, she wouldn’t want anything different: “What we have heard through our life in this home is ‘we feel so comfortable here.’ People love small spaces . . . You can be in a big house and everyone is in the kitchen. It’s just this gathering or comfort in being forced to be close to one another.”
When we discussed why beauty matters, Judy told me, “I was born happy. I am an optimist. I find beauty in almost everything I encounter. It’s not just in this house.” She went on to tell me about a book she once read, ‘God on A Harley’ by Joan Brady. In the book, a frustrated God declares that he’s made so much cool stuff, and no one is noticing it. Judy sees it as her RESPONSIBILITY to look and find beauty. “It’s everywhere,” she proclaimed.
Judy pointed out the Heritage Auctions catalog on her coffee table. She opened it up and showed me some of the gorgeous jewelry inside. One can only imagine the wealth and beauty of the women who wore this jewelry. But while all the jewelry inside this book are incredible, she explained to me that this is not the beauty that she pursues. She knows that even if she owned one piece inside the catalog, it is not the key to her happiness. And what she said next I hope will stay in me forever. Read this slowly and try to absorb:
“I see beauty more in people, faces… there’s beauty in expressions, the conversations that have taken place in this room. That’s beauty to me! That’s everything that I want. I want to hear the voice. I want to hear the story. I want to hear the laughter. Please God, be funny. I want to see the hand gestures, the clothing. All those things come together to create a beautiful experience in this room.”
Wow! I hate to admit it, but . . . Judy values people on a level I have not reached. We’ve historically picked homes as a family with large yards to keep the neighbors away. We spread out at night each to our own corners of the house. Technology is our mistress. And we’ve lost something that Judy never has… Judy consistently places people over things. She understands that things like signs broken by dear friends can be replaced or loved more dearly in their brokenness because now they have a story. Judy knows that its what happens in a room, not what’s in it, that means the most.
Judy values her alone time too, but she’s made room for people. She’s designed a space that says, ‘come on in. let it all go.’ I will never be as social, nor the natural optimist Judy is. But I don’t need to change my nature in order to change my Happy Place to accommodate more joy from the people I welcome there.
This is a period in American history when the need for a space like Judy’s is heightened. We need ways to feel lighter. A space that tells your story and carries the love of gatherings past can soothe you in ways nothing else can. If your walls could talk, would there be memories of laughter, love and joy? Or would it just be the quiet sounds of your own solitude?
As I’m grabbing my things and getting ready to leave, I told Judy that her daughter was correct, that she is a perfect match for my blog and the kind of stories I want to tell. She responded, “She usually is… that little shit!” Oh, the laughter that brought! After piano music and tea in such a sophisticated space. . . I wasn’t expecting that. But it only made me adore the woman she is more. May we all meet and know someone like Judy Truesdell . . . someone who truly values people above all else.
TO LEARN MORE ABOUT JUDY TRUESDELL . . .
COMING SOON!!! Judy is opening an online Etsy store called 23marketstreet for her classic vintage clothing line for women.
