Nobody died. Except me

“Ok, ok, gosh ya fuckin twat,” he said it with a smile though. He loved seeing his friend get all, what was the word? Oh yes, pissy. The way Chas get’s all pissy is just so cute, his little aggression and his little angry flush. 

John couldn’t stop smiling at it, but he relented nonetheless, they do need to get to America. John pulled out runes from inside his jacket pocket. 

“Oh come on! Ya’ can’t honestly be this boring?” He couldn’t right? The big bad batsy? The man with the plan? The Bruce Wayne? Are they all lies? Is this man just a horribly boring bloke? 

“And I don’t. I took the night off just to be a thorn in yer side.” He smiled, “ and to get that nice smooch.” 

Bruce rolled his eyes. He wondered how he managed to get along with Constantine half the time when he was always too busy being drunk and being a thorn in his ass. He’d claim he was patient but that couldn’t be it. 

“Well, if ya want me ta seduce yer other guests I can do that too. I’m sure that’ll be a great thing fer ya gala, may talk about ya and all yer little secrets,” Was it a low blow? Yes, but did he hate the fact Bruce was trying so hard to push him off? Yes. 

So, low blows it was. 

It’s why he hasn’t changed. 

He looked down at his not straight tie. Well, that’s never happened before. “This shit is real awful,” except for the free food and free little glasses of champagne. He loves that shit. 

“I think I will help you.” She titled her had to the side with a smile. Harley was more than capable. Most of the schemes done between her and the Joker were her idea anyway.

He smiled at her, a little crooked smile, “Glad to get yer assist,” Really glad, actually, because he can’t do shit in a fist fight. He’s mainly just good at the zapping and manipulating. 

as requested by @ambitionbled (it won’t let me tag you, sorry!)

CONCERN.

❝How much have you had to drink?❞

❝You could have fucking alcohol poisoning!❞  

❝Easy, there. Try to sit up.❞

❝I think I might’ve overdone it on the alcohol…❞

❝We’ve got to go get your stomach pumped.❞

❝I thought you said you were clean!❞

❝Yes, it is a big deal.❞

❝Let me drive you home.❞

❝You are NOT driving like this!❞

❝You are gonna have one hell of a hangover tomorrow.❞

❝Drinking until you puke is not normal.❞

DRUNK.

❝Is this real life?❞ 

❝I want to go to sleep but I can’t find any sheep.❞

❝How do you show fish affection?❞

❝Taco Bell is open 24 hours, right?❞

❝Tequila is not my friend? YOU’RE not my friend.❞

❝Drunk I am not.❞

-glasses on head- ❝Where did I put my glasses?❞

❝How do I tell my parents I’m a mermaid?❞ 

❝I’m not even tired.❞

❝I should call my ex.❞

❝I’m not drunk enough for this.❞

❝Does playing Mario Kart drunk count as drunk driving?❞

-hugging the floor- ❝I’m trying to stop the floor from spinning.❞

❝Can we go out for fried chicken?❞

ANGST.

❝What’s the fucking point anymore?❞

❝Screw recovery. I want a drink.❞

❝I’m too sober for this shit.❞ 

❝I don’t give a shit what you think.❞

❝I seriously don’t feel too good.❞

❝I didn’t even have that much to drink.❞

❝Will you stop fucking interrogating me?❞

❝I can drive. I’m fine.❞

❝There’s a reason I drink so much.❞

❝You’re the reason I drink so much.❞

❝I’m only happy when I’m drunk.❞

FLUFF/FUN.

❝You’re cute, you know that?❞ 

❝You wanna get wasted?❞

❝I’m bar-hopping tonight, wanna come?❞

❝What are you drinking, and why aren’t you sharing?❞

❝I’m having a party for two.❞

❝You’re so hot.❞

❝I’m usually too chicken-shit to say this, but…I really like you.❞

❝I don’t want to kiss you with your alcohol breath.❞

*kisses on forehead*

*kisses on cheek*

“Did ya really just call me magic ‘woogie’?”

John was insulted, scandalized, and frankly, a little amused. Not many people got magic. Batsy didn’t, most of the bats didn’t, a few of the speedsters, the general public, but eh, what they don’t know will only hurt them. 

But what’s new? 

“It ain’t science fiction, that means science. It’s magic, maybe not ver’ nice magic, but magic none the less.” He tapped the ash of his cigarette into the ash tray, but missed a bit. He wasn’t too careful on the best of days, after all. 

Send A Symbol To Explain Why We’re Not RPing Yet

“You look like you could use a coffee.”

“Is that something you want to talk about?”

“Come on, sit down. It’s break time.”

“I needed that, thanks…”

“Here’s a blanket. You looked cold.”

“Thank god you’re back, I need to rant.”

“Is my sweater ever going to be returned?”

“Bad day? Emergency plans are in order.”

“Alright your ride has arrived, where to next?”

“I’m brushing your hair, it’s a mess.”

“You happened to go get lunch and ‘bought too much’ huh?”

“Your hugs are the best.”

“Hey. Hey. Heeeeeey. Come on. We’re gonna be late, get up.”

“I’m late, yes. You should be used to that by now.”

“How long as it been that we’ve known each other? Feels like ages.”

“There was something on your face, I had to get it off.”

“You’re sure people think we’re dating?”

“I think it’s hilarious people assume they’re dating just because they’re nice to each other.”

“I need to hang out with someone I like, can we pretend to be working for an hour?”

“Tea and coffee? What happened?”

“Here you go, one forgotten, left it at home in a rush, lost item!”

“I’m going for a walk, you want anything?”

“… sorry I took a nap on you.”

“I suppose I am now requisitioned to being a napping spot.”

acts  that  could  be  aggressive   //   or  a  little  bit  sexy   //   or  both.                     send  a  symbol  from  your  muse  to  mine.  feel  free  to  combine  actions  or  add  specifics  even  when  it  doesn’t  ask  for  it   !     can  send  non - sexually  as  well.

THREATENING

🔪   //   put  a  knife  to  my  muse’s  throat .

🖐️   //   put  a  hand  around  my  muse’s  throat .

👕   //   slide  a  weapon  up  under  my  muse’s  shirt     (   can  specify   ) .

👔   //   grab  my  muse  by  the  collar   &   pull  them  closer .

🔒   //   lock  my  muse  in  a  room  alone  with  your  muse .

🗩   //   verbally  threaten  my  muse     (   please  specify   ) .

PINNING

🔙   //   push  my  muse  against  a  wall .

📌   //   pin  my  muse’s  wrists  above  their  head .

🔵   //   grab  my  muse  hard  enough  to  leave  a  bruise .

🔑   //   handcuff  my  muse .

➰   //   tie  my  muse  to  a  chair .

⭕   //   restrain  my  muse  with  an  item  of  clothing     (   please  specify   ) .

🚨   //   push  my  muse  to  the  ground   &   straddle  them .

📢   //   tell  my  muse   ‘  stop  squirming   !  ’ .

🔗   //   otherwise  restrain  my  muse     (   please  specify   ) .

LIGHTER

👀   //   grab  my  muse’s  jaw   &   direct  their  gaze  towards  yours .

⚡   //   tug  my  muse’s  hair .

⚠️   //   bite  my  muse     (   can  specify  where   ) .

😏   //   give  my  muse  a  hickey .

✂️   //   run  fingernails  over  my  muse’s  skin   &   scratch  them .

💦   //   cover  my  muse’s  mouth .

DARKER

💋   //   give  my  muse  a  kiss  that  draws  blood .

🗡️   //   cut  my  muse  with  a  knife     (   can  specify  where   ) .

💀   //   kidnap  my  muse .

😶   //   put  a  hand  over  my  muse’s  nose   &   mouth .

starters  /  prompts taken from various characters starring in the game   fire emblem : three houses .  feel free to change pronouns  /  tenses as necessary .

“  feel free to say hi whenever you like  ”

“  don’t hold back for my sake  ”

“  you think I’m so clumsy that I need someone to watch over me ?  ”

“  you act like you’re full of regret  ,  but I know you don’t really mean it  ”

“  you actually look more handsome to me with honesty on your face  ”

“  don’t be ashamed of crying  ”

“  could you keep quiet for a bit ?  ”

“  you’re actually kind of amazing  ”

“  do you mean to imply you have no intention of acting a bit more respectably ?  ”

“  stop acting so nonchalant about getting hurt or killed  ”

“  naive and uptight is no way to live your life  ”

“  you’d better watch that temper  ”

“  i am absolutely disinterested in spending any time with you  ”

“  your lack of self-awareness is deeply troubling  ”

“  I’ll just be straightforward about taking advantage of you  ”

“  when will you tire of challenging me in pointless competitions ?  ”

“  you expect me to believe that ?  ”

“  i’ve had enough of your foolish antics  ”

“  i wish you would not sneak up on me like that  ”

“  before you reprimand me  ,  take a moment to consider your own failings  ”

“  it is like hearing a snake sing an aria  ”

“  am I hearing a deathbed confession ?  ”

“  i never have any idea what you’re talking about  ”

“  don’t walk away when i’m talking to you  ”

“  you’ll be the death of me for sure  ”

“  i do not intend to die  ”

“  i can’t believe you put yourself at risk for my benefit  ”

“  i don’t think i’ve ever seen you smile  ”

“  i do not desire your gratitude  ”

“  you’re surprisingly strong for how slender you appear  ”

“  perhaps i was flustered needlessly  ”

“  i had forgotten how charmingly ethereal you can be  ”

“  you’re going a little overboard  ”

“  you have shaken me to my very core  ”

“  so this is what death is like  ”

“  if you get sick of me  ,  i’m sorry ahead of time  ”

“  i’m embarrassed just thinking about it  ”

“  you’re like a little brother to me  ”

“  spending the rest of my life with you doesn’t sound so bad  ”

“  if our roles were reversed  ,  I don’t think I’d be able to forgive you  ”

“  you actually hate me  ,  right ?  ”

“  you haven’t stabbed me yet  ”

“  i want to be more like you  ”

“  i actually envy the size of your heart  ”

“  i don’t think you can solve all your problems by throwing a few punches  ”

“  there aren’t a lot of people like you in the world  ”

“  sorry I’ve been so oblivious to your needs  ”

“  sometimes you just can’t afford to wait around for someone else to notice ”

“  yesterday’s enemy is today’s ally  ”

“  you have to abandon old feuds  ”

“  learn to protect yourself before trying to protect me  ”

“  i always trust that you’ve got my back  ”

“  if only people could be more like flowers  ”

“  if you promise not to resort to violence  ,  I’ll do whatever you want  ”

“  i can’t stand the sight of me either  ”

“  i would be even more impressed if you hadn’t been screaming the whole time  ”

“  i did what was necessary to get you to comply  ”

“  you have so much power in you  ,  just waiting to be unleashed  ”

❝ I’d almost forgotten about you. ❞

❝ I love you just the way you are! ❞

❝ In your homeland you’re a legend. ❞

❝ I’ve won scores of bloody wars and mopped the floors with my foes, but no one remembers me! ❞

❝ Say my name in these parts and you’ll get a vacant stare. ❞

❝ So to restore my repute as a fierce fearsome brute, there’s only one route I see, arrange the slaughter of millions of innocent civilians, then they’ll remember me! ❞

❝ Caked in mud, or drenched in blood you smell as fresh as a flower. ❞

❝ I’m a god on earth but darn it, even deities incarnate now and then can feel a little insecure. ❞

❝ All I want is some affection this rejection’s almost too much to endure! ❞

❝ Am I not a thing of beauty?! ❞

❝ Wouldn’t you gladly give up all of your worldly possessions just to greet me when I come home from a one sided massacre, and bathe my sweaty, bloody body with your tongue? ❞

❝ She may not love me yet, but I’m willing to bet that once I kill all her people she will! ❞

❝ Let them laugh, that’s just fine, but the last laugh will be mine ‘cause they can’t laugh when they’re all dead. ❞

❝ They’ll remember me! ❞

❝ Aren’t you busy ruining my life? ❞

❝ I noticed you weren’t at dinner, but I saw you tried to poison my wine. Usually when you do that it means you want to talk. ❞

❝ You ripped out my heart and smashed it into a million pieces! ❞

❝ I want to expect the unexpected! ❞

❝ You’re young. You don’t exactly get how things work yet. ❞

❝ And while I don’t appreciate any of your ideas, I do appreciate the fact that you have ideas! Maybe one day you’ll have some good ones! ❞

❝ How the fuck did you know it was me? ❞

❝ Don’t you trust me? ❞

❝ Take off your clothes. ❞

❝ No, you’re a liar. ❞

❝ They’ll kill me if I’m lucky, they’ll torture me if not. ❞

❝ If my crime can help improve the world we all must live in, am I not bound by duty to the people of this nation? ❞

❝ Temptation may have beckoned but I always have resisted. ❞

❝ Which way do I turn when the road’s become so twisted? ❞

❝ You think you know me as others think they know you, but there are two sides to every story. ❞

❝ The story lingers on, but the version that is drawn is twisted! ❞

❝ Fortune favours the beautiful. ❞

❝ My only crime was love. ❞

❝ But the heart wants what it wants. And sometimes what it wants is twisted! ❞

❝ I only wished to reclaim what was mine! ❞

❝ I only wished to give the people a voice! ❞

❝ It’s an unfortunate situation, but you do have a choice. ❞

❝ What remains of a man when that man is dead and gone? ❞

❝ Why protect my reputation? I’m a dead man either way. ❞

❝ The question then is whether 'tis nobler in the mind to be well liked but ineffectual, or moral but maligned? ❞

❝ I’ll never be a hero all the citizens adore, but if I hide to save my life what has my life been for? ❞

❝ The road ahead may twist, but I will never swerve! ❞

❝ I’ll give them all the unsung anti-hero they deserve! ❞

❝ I’ve nothing left to lose, so the only path to choose is twisted! ❞

❝ Let them twist my words let the people scorn me, who cares if no one will ever mourn me?! ❞

❝ Listen! I am a mortal man and don’t understand your strange godlike tongue! ❞

❝ I’ve got to become a sorcerer! Can you do that? ❞

❝ I am not charmed by your crazy bullshit now. ❞

❝ You either need to back me the fuck up, or shut the fuck up. Got it? ❞

❝ Would you stop acting like an asshole for one minute? ❞

❝ You’re trying to seduce me! ❞

❝ You have no idea how much that girl means to me. ❞

❝ I didn’t want them to die! ❞

❝ It takes someone who believes they can change the world to actually do it. ❞

❝ When I was your age I thought I could accomplish anything I ever wanted, and more! But I didn’t. Perhaps no one does. ❞

❝ Tomorrow always comes. ❞

❝ Do not be fooled by appearances, for though it may seem small, the power to love one another is the greatest power of all! ❞

❝ I wish you didn’t have to go when our story’s just begun. ❞

❝ I wish you every happiness. ❞