I'm a Black Woman Fanfiction Writer. 28. Inspiring Author. I love Anime and a plethora of TV Shows. KPOP/JPOP Fan. I watch too much YouTube. I'm OC Trash. Obsessed with Moon Knight and Eddie Munson.
Steven Grant post 1 | Steven Grant post 2 | Marc Spector & Jake Lockley post 1 Steven Grant post 3 | Marc & Steven post 1 | Reblogs are appreciated & encouraged on this post & the ones linked!
This post is being written by someone (me) who has Autism Spectrum Disorder & is also mentally ill.
There’s a read-more break but please read this entire post! It’s just as important as my other ones!
Moon divider by @/firefly-graphics.
I saw a post about atypical autism traits & I wanna talk about it because I feel so fucking seen!!!! I'm gonna talk about how it manifests in both Marc & Steven!! I'll be referencing the post heavily so I recommend reading the post as well to understand the points I'm making!!!!!!
Let's talk about their appearance / Personal Habits:
Note: Not everything in this section will be mentioned, just some things.
Steven dressed comfortably while Marc dress practically but to them, their outfits are both comfortable & practical. They aren't wearing too much, too little, their clothes feel nice, they're comfy for their sensory needs, etc.
Marc especially dresses practically, wearing bots he can run in, clothes that aren't baggy so they won't get caught on things, he wears a watch to tell time easier, and he dresses in very neutral colors to blend in. Whereas Steven wears looser fitting clothes, and comfortable shoes (sometimes sneakers or dress shoes), he is dressing solely for comfort but he is still dressed practically.
Steven always wears a light jacket, his pants don't hit the floor, his shoes are clearly for standing/walking around, and he also has a pocket. In the said pocket he stores his work badge and his glasses, & I would assume any other small items he might need readily available at all times!
Both of their ways of dressing are very practical & sensory-friendly for them & their specific needs. Even in the asylum they are dressed in outfits clearly representing their needs; Steven's is baggier while Marc's is more fitted & nothing covers his hands or hangs too low!
Both of them not only look very young but they both act young, more so Steven than Marc. Steven has this boyish look to him in the way his face is much brighter, his eyes are wider, his face is fully expressive & so on. Whereas Marc, who still looks young, tends to look older than Steven but not by much due to how he holds his brows, and his eyes, he seldom expresses unless he is around Layla/Steven.
An example would be the boat scene where he makes a wide expression with his mouth almost as if he's clicking. He does this when he tells Layla "It doesn't matter--" it's for a split second & then it's gone like it never happened! Yet he opening makes faces around Layla & around Steven--even around Taweret--he openly frowns & looks worried around them, he looks angry around them, etc.
Steven gets starry-eyed & smiles brightly, he looks gutted when he's sad or upset, he frowns fully with his entire mouth, he makes a grossed-out face when shoving his hand in Alexander's gullet, etc.
Another thing I notice is Steven can be very chameleon-like & will simply blend in to get by, Marc does this as well. Steven does it primarily in the museum & Marc does it all during episode three---he is actively just trying to skirt by & not get noticed. Even when he's with Layla he is relying on her & on her actions & motives---he's not taking lead unless she gives him the lead because he does not know what to do otherwise.
Also, Marc's sense of style seems very--basic---as if he isn't truly sure who he is or how he should represent himself. Unlike Steven who clearly has an aesthetic & even Jake who has an aesthetic---Marc does not. Marc seems to, again, want to just blend into the world around him in hopes that no one sees him, no one speaks to him, & no one learns anything about him.
I don't know about Marc but I know steven enjoys reading, obviously, he is seen reading every Egyptology book known to man in his cozy flat. We see that he does this gladly & doesn't even seem the teensiest bit lonely or perturbed by it. Furthering that he's very much a homebody & I think Marc is as well--they prefer being home in their controlled space where they know what everything is & how everything works--this also falls into their controlled habits like Steven's nighttime alarms.
Let's talk about their Intellectual / Giftedness / Education / Vocation Traits:
Note: Not everything in this section will be mentioned, just some things.
We see that Steven is very skilled in Egyptology & he seems to be very very skilled in public speaking as well--more so than Marc. This falls into how passionate he is about his job, how he's always begging donna to promote him & why he is so devastated when he gets fired unceremoniously.
I also think this causes Steven to be more of a visual learner than a verbal learner. We see him reading book after book & while he listens to the staying awake podcast I don't think it helps him because he may not be fully comprehending it. Verbalized instructions seem to confuse him & they seem to confuse Marc as well as evident at Senfu's sarcophagus.
Marc gets visibly overwhelmed & Steven seems t be having a difficult time properly explaining how the map works. They both are tired & overwhelmed during this entire scene & I think it plays a big role in why Marc gives in & gives the body to Steven. Not only can Steven solve the puzzle but he can piece it together faster than he can explain it verbally to someone like a game of telephone.
As for their obsessions/hyperfixations, Steven's is obviously Egyptology & museums whiles Marc's--from my understanding--seems to be baseball! I say this because of the Chicago Cubs memorabilia in his childhood bedroom & the hat he wears in episode three that he subsequently runs back for.
Let's talk about their Emotional / Physical traits:
Not: Not everything in this section will be mentioned, just some things.
Neither of them is emotionally immature however they are very emotionally sensitive--especially Steven. Marc tends to mask his emotions fairly well until he doesn't & Steven doesn't hide his at all. It's very easy to tell when Steven is unhappy or excited while it's harder to gauge with Marc.
Both of them have lots of anxiety & fear but I think they mutually hide it pretty well once they understand what's going on. Granted, again, Steven is less likely of the two to fully mask his while Marc tries to seem as direct & steadfast as possible. I, personally, think a lot of this is due to Marc's need to mask to protect himself & to protect Steven because we notice during episodes 5 & 6 that he is openly showing emotion in ways he hadn't before (also like the mask has been lifted) & we see him shaken multiple times outside of reliving memories.
We especially see this in scenes with Layla & the scene when he fronts directly after Jake. In episode three he is not nearly as expressive & is showing his discomfort in the form of anger while in episode 6 he is genuinely worried--both of them are---& they make that known to each other. Neither of them is masking their true feelings at this point & is pulling the veil back bit by bit.
Steven seems to dislike bright lights--I assume this from how dark their flat is--I think he also dislikes loud noises. Marc most likely dislikes them as well but he is better at pushing his way through it than Steven/is more used to dealing with loud noises etc. However, Steven seems very very sensitive to touch because not only is shoving his hand in a mummy's gullet fucking gross but it probably feels horrendous! Same with the fact that not only did the weird fucking jars of--yknow--people's insides--smell awful but it was probably much worse for Steven who, most likely, has sensory processing disorder along with his ASD.
Moodiness is something I never realized was fully a part of ASD until a year or more ago. However, I don't think Steven or Marc are ever being moody during the show----I think they are under extreme stress & are trying to mask it while frantically trying to understand each other.
I've talked about their stims in the posts linked above so I won't go too into that again but, they absolutely stim & self-soothe pretty heavily. Steven, once again, doing it more than Marc because Steven is very much an un-masked Autistic adult.
Steven & Marc both seem to be pretty vocal about injustices or perceived injustices & lash out accordingly. Steven tells Harrow what he is doing is wrong without fear even though he knows he shouldn't, Marc lashes at Khonshu repeatedly because not only did a teenager die but they died because Khonshu told Marc to do something he didn't want to do. We see this in how Marc & steven argue with one another as well because they are receiving each other as unjust & are subsequently projecting & perpetuating uncivil arguing tactics on one another (I have a post going into this as well, it's linked above).
They both have meltdowns/get triggered very easily, Steven shuts down after confrontation (I speak about this in other posts as well) & Marc shuts down for similar reasons. We see Marc do this with Layla & even Khonshu---Steven does it primarily with Donna & on occasion Marc.
Let's talk about their Social / Relationships habits:
Not: Not everything in this section will be mentioned, just some things.
Out of the two, Marc is not only misunderstood by others but he is perceived as cold-natured & unfriendly; none of these things are true. As I mentioned in my first post about him he is a masking autistic adult--he is not cold, mean, or unkind---he is just keeping his guard up for his own safety.
steven on the other hand is very outspoken, he infodumps readily, he talks loudly when excited, and he also talks very quickly while excited. He is perceived as friendlier, softer, and calmer---that is because he is not masking.
As mentioned above they both tend to shut down when overloaded/stressed. they will even shut down on one another purely from the overwhelm & the probable meltdown they are surprising. However, we also see Steven heavily act like he knows what he's doing in the tomb--like he has all the skills that Marc has--which is obviously not entirely true. I think it's less about impressing Layla & more about Steven wanting to get by on his own as he has always done until recently.
We also see that Steven & Marc have a considerable lack of friends, this may be why Jake tried setting up the date.
Steven is only friends with Crawley, Layla, & possibly friendly enough with JB. He has no other circle outside of them & eventually, he befriends Marc but still, his circle remains limited & Marc's is just as limited. Marc has Layla & steven--I don't think he has anyone else that he considers a friend to him.
I think the both of them desire a romantic relationship of some kind as evident by steven getting ready for the date. Personally, I think he's dated before on & off & obviously Marc was/is married to Layla & he takes their marriage very seriously--so much so that he tried divorcing her as a means of keeping her safe from him & Khonshu. This is probably also why Marc gets so upset when steven begins falling in love with Layla & later kisses her without his express permission to do so.
Noticeably we see how Steven stares at Layla but is unable to verbalize his affections. He even says "I know I'm not bloody alone! I've got Layla!" when Marc tries to comfort him--I think this is both out of stress & out of Steven's fixation with Layla. I do think he is truly in love with her he just---is very unsure as to how he should voice that properly/if he is even allowed to voice that.
If you made it this far I appreciate you dearly! These are all merely my observations & all I ask is that you are respectful, I have had a few nasty comments/tags on my posts & I am not afraid to block you.
I'm making these posts to be cathartic for myself because for once in my life, I am being represented in media as someone who is real & not robotic.
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can you imagine jeong jinman’s desperation when he finds out bale is alive and actively killing anyone and everyone who is associated with him?
his first thought is to save you and jian when he confirms his brother and sister-in-law have been murdered.
he does everything in his power to protect the both of you, deciding to move far, far away with the help of pasin. jian doesn’t quite understand what is going on, and you don’t either but you start questioning him.
who is responsible for this? why are they doing this? how do you know these people?
jinman, who has unresolved feelings for you but chose to never act on them in fear of this happening, doesn’t know how to answer you. which is a first for him.
he almost doesn’t want to tell you, concerned with the prospect of you hating him because of his dark past but he’ll tell you regardless, over the course of months and months and only providing you with the bare minimum of details to stop your questions. you choose to leave it there, fully trusting of jinman and his intent. he appreciates this.
the three of you fall into a rather domestic routine, jinman who quietly makes dinner every evening with your assistance (despite his persistence in not needing any help), you help jian with her homework and take her on regular girls only outings (jinman follows you two initially to ensure your safety).
he decides to teach you self defence, and basic combat techniques, with the reasoning being “just in case.” you don’t think much of the supposed training but he surprises you with his quick and precise movements. you attempt to imitate him but it ends with you pressed against a wall with your arms caught in his hands.
jinman feels conflicted, his feelings for you only blossoming now he’s essentially living with you as you both raise his niece. it’s so domestic and almost exactly what he pictured when he thought of a life with you.
Oh Sweet, sweet JJ. He is my favorite character hands down. At the beginning of the season they showed us a reckless kid from the wrong side of the tracks that only cared about hooking up, drinking beer, smoking weed and being with his friends. But he is so much more. JJ is hilarious, I've laughed out loud with his comments all the time, things like:
"just give me the John D already"
"Rose you look like Lady liberty"
"Housekeeping"
Were stupid little things that made him more likeable. He also did crazy shit all the time, like firing a gun in the middle of a party when they were supposed to be laying low, stealing said gun from a crime scene, stealing from a drug dealer,...
But all his craziness is rooted in a deep love for his friends. He has a very difficult life, his father is a drunk asshole that beats him up all the time, which has made him kind of desperate for love, and the Pogues love him. So, he takes matters into his own hands and decides to do wathever is necessary to keep them safe. He fires the gun to save John B, he gets into a fight with Rafe to defend Kie, he takes the blame for Pope, risking going to jail so he doesn't loose his Scholarship. He doesn't hesitate to go back to his house, after the worst physical fight with his abusive dad, just to save John B from going to jail. Also, we can see that JJ is terrified of his father, while still hoping to make him proud. That's why he steals the money, so that he can show his dad that he can sort things out by himself, although this doesn't go as planned.
It's so sad that he behaves this way, because it shows that he has given up on himself completely. He puts his life on the line all the time, and I think that in his head all his friends are going somewhere in life; Pope is going to college, John B gets by just fine and Kie is rich, and he's not.
Also, I think that he doesn't pursue Kie for real, choosing to playfully flirt with her all the time instead , because he doesn't think that he deserves someone like her. She's hot, nice, smart, funny and rich. And that makes her unattainable, at least in his head. How could someone like her want to be with someone like him? When not even his own dad seems to think that he's worth it.
One of my favorite things about JJ is that he's a big softie. When you see him hanging out with the Pogues, is when you can appreciate it best. He has a fondness in the way that he carries himself around them, that warms my heart.
He truly deserves good things to happen in his life next season.
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Moderately Interesting Japanese Ep. 1: Unusual Last Names
Above: awesome name stamps Japanese people use in lieu of a signature on documents. I really want the laser beam Buddha.
So, I’ve been living in Japan for almost five years now (!!! Where has the time gone?!) and I’ve been working full-time as a Japanese-English translator for a big corporate machine for two years counting. It’s pretty fun despite working for The Man, and I’ve picked up lots of quirky little Japanese expressions, words, and unusual surnames along the way. I thought I’d share some of them here from time to time with you. I’m kinda toying with the format still, so bear with me haha.
I’m a big fan of Japanese names and the kanji they use for them. The more unusual, the more I love it! Here’s a collection of intriguing last names I’ve encountered during my stay here.
又吉 Matayoshi, a.k.a. “Lucky Again”
Apparently the mata (again) used to mean “crossroads,” and yoshi is a common character to put in a last name. It has its roots in Okinawa.
Number of people with this last name: ~9,800
剣持 Kenmochi, a.k.a. “Possesses a Sword”
SO COOL. This surname comes from a powerful noble family from current-day Okayama and Yamanashi Prefectures.
Number of people with this last name: ~5,200
蘇武 Sobu, a.k.a. “Reborn Warrior”
Just when you thought things couldn’t get any more metal than “Possesses a Sword.” This name is just badass. It also originates from Miyagi Prefecture, but that’s all that I could find about its etymology.
Number of people with this last name: ~1,000
大学 Daigaku, a.k.a. “University”
This name probably was given to people who lived near a large school in Miyagi Prefecture back in the day.
Number of people with this last name: ~680
一 Ninomae, a.k.a. “One”
The kanji 一 means “one” and is usually pronounced ichi or hitotsu. So why is it read ni no mae here? Ni is “two,” and no mae is “before.” So in other words, this last name translates to “before two,” which would have to be the number one, and so it is written as 一. Do you have a headache from reading that? lol
Number of people with this last name: ~380
鷹橋 Takanohashi, a.k.a. “Hawk Bridge”
It’s a pretty interesting surname for a couple reasons. Firstly, there is a very common surname Takahashi that is usually written 高橋, which translates to “tall bridge,” so the hawk kanji is really out of left field for Japanese people. This surname is also unusual because it has its roots in Hokkaido, which was the last prefecture to be settled and doesn’t have much history compared to the main Japanese islands. Though it is written with the kanji for “bridge,” the meaning of hashi is actually “one who travels to distant lands,” which would have been fitting for a settler.
Number of people with this last name: ~240
猫屋敷 Nekoyashiki, a.k.a. “Cat Mansion”
Well, imagine “mansion” as an estate that a wealthy lord would have lived on back in the day with servants and stuff. So does this mean that this person’s ancestors were rich cat ladies? Not necessarily. There is an expression “as narrow as a cat’s forehead” to indicate a cramped/small space, and the neko (cat) of Nekoyashiki implies that this person’s manor and grounds were small.
If you haven’t already noticed from this list, many Japanese last names denote geographical features of where their ancestors lived. Any last name with yama (mountain) or ta/da (rice paddy) is denoting geography, for example. However, it’s highly unusual for a last name to be a street like this. This last name has its roots in Fukushima.
Number of people with this last name: ~20
Sources:
Header images from left to right
Laser Buddha: 邪悪なハンコ屋しにものぐるい
Kanpai Kat: picstamp.net
Wily fox: 工房HANZOU
Air pressure anon. Sorry about the demand for an air pressure quirk. I meant to request a weather manipulation quirk based on air like you had mentioned in another post
okay so recently i watched this show from netflix called "The Hollows" and there's is character who's power is weather manipulation. seeing that was so cool and it got me thinking like how would a weather manipulation work in my hero academia ???!
I thought that was an option, since air pressure is related to weather, but I wasn’t sure what you meant. I hope you find this satisfying.
This Emitter type Quirk allows the user to manipulate the water in the surrounding air to form clouds, which they may control as well. With these clouds, the user may then replicate various forms of traditional cloud weather, such as snow, hail, rain, wind, and even lightning. The user's control seems to weaken at longer ranges, such as an attempting to cover a couple of city blocks only resulting in a drizzle. However, the real power comes about in smaller forms, with the user able to make far stronger weather phenomena. With the amount of potential weather the user has on hand, the user has many options on hand with just a human sized cloud. They can shoot out small lightning bolts, launch out fist sized chunks of hail, make it rain with the force of a fire hose, blast out tornado-like winds, or just cover an area with snow. Though this is entirely dependent on their being water in the air, being ineffective in warm or arid areas, and the user lacks any kind of protection from the weather they make. A possible name for this Quirk could be "Hydrometeor”, “Weathered”, or “Weather Man”.
Synopsis. Bréeding kínk? Going feraI? What the hell is that? Maybe your sweet clan leader husband knows the answer…
Pairing. Choso Kamo x Reader
Content. MDNI, fem! reader, clan leader! Choso, arranged marriage, mentions of heirs, he’s a little ínsane, elders are awful, MARATHONS, he goes FÉRAL, BRÉEDING, creampíes, a lot of cúmplay, semi-public, dóm Choso, oraI (fem rec), cervíx kíssing, making it fit, bulges, cúmflations, matíng presses, dúmbification, overstím, making him CRY, p talking, spítting, HEADLOCKS, slight 5 + 1 things, pet names, swéaring.
Word count. 9.3k
A/N. CLAN LEADER CHOSO CLAN LEADER CHOSO
Choso Kamo - firstborn son of the ancient Kamo clan, more of a myth than a man.
Those who attended the sprawling Kamo Estate never dared utter a word about him; and those who didn’t, well, he was all that they could talk about.
He left no evidence, he left no remorse.
Only rumors of a silent, stoic leader who could slaughter four entirely different clans before he let even a singular whisper of it spread amongst the masses. Ones of pretty mahogany eyes, and a silver bow and arrows that hit the target of your very soul - so fluid it was as if he’d forged the weapon with his own blood.
And then there were the other rumors - more gossip than anything, really. Spread throughout every nook and cranny of stuffy social functions about how the deadly Kamo clan leader had another, secretive side. A softer side.
But, of course, rumors were rumors. Choso Kamo was simply an enigma.
And…your new husband.
“Zoning out, hm?” A hot gust of breath sends shivers sprinting down your spine, and in an instant you’re snapping your eyes to latch onto deep, hazel ones. Choso’s. The edge of his plump lips curl slightly upwards, “My apologies, this wedding reception is quite droning, isn’t it?”
Hastily breathing, “N-no! Of course not, I…” You’re wincing when yet another wizened elder saunters up to the raised platform of your table. Probably the hundredth of the night. “-yeah, maybe a bit.”
Choso stifles out a rumbling bout of chuckles as he catches your gaze, so close now that his pearly white teeth almost nick your sensitive earlobe. “Let me take care of this, my wife.”
And when Choso shifts over to nod curtly at your oncoming guest, you couldn’t help but appreciate how beautiful he is. All tall, towering lines of lean muscle, his silken black yukata wafting of heady cologne, and delicate features that made him have almost as many admirers as he did foes.
Or, at least, delicate features that were currently twisted into something hardened. Something exactly like clan leader Kamo of all the stories.
He’s tilting his head up, long lashes narrowed, “Elder Tanaka, a pleasure.”
“No no! The pleasure’s all mine.” The older man slurs drunkenly, and despite the way his words were just dripping with saccharine sweet politeness, years of suffering through these exact interactions had made it easy for you to spot faux niceties. Like right now. “Or should I say- the new madam’s. You must be glad to marry into a clan as esteemed as the Kamo’s.”
The plastic smile that smears all over your face is painful, and you’re biting your tongue before it betrays you. “Yes, of c-”
“My apologies for cutting in, madam.” You’re startling - but you don’t know whether it’s because of the softened fingerpads that intertwine around yours, or the utter fire curdling in Choso’s eyes. “But I must say, I am the lucky one here.”
Oh.
Elder Tanaka is more impressive than you thought - his mask of respect barely even cracks, other than the jerky twitch of one eye. Honestly, you don’t think he’s ever heard Choso speak this much ever before. Quickly gathering his bearings, “Ah- ah, of course, master Kamo! Correct as always!”
Fuck- you can’t hold back the way you roll your eyes, only remembering yourself when Choso’s engulfing hands loosen from your own to give your thigh a warm squeeze.
“You have wedded quite the catch, of course of course.” Your unwelcome company finally, finally looks at you properly. A sneer coating his slow blinking, “I-I simply meant that considering the master’s incredible power, wealth, and options, what she brings to the table-”
“-is herself.” Choso finishes off monotonically. “And that’s all I need.”
Choso’s words were husky, his grip on you tight. And you wonder if he even realized just how hard he was clutching onto your heated skin - mountains of his palm dragging a smooth up n’ down your clothed leg.
You knew he was well-hidden underneath the lacy tablecloth, you knew that not a single elder, family member, or friend bustling about your wedding reception could see that particular touch over the dim yolky lighting.
But something about it just made you feel hot.
It takes you a few fuzzy seconds to realize that Elder Tanaka was still speaking - in fact, he’d even summoned over a few more members of the council to encircle your decadent table. All the more voices speaking at you rather than to you.
“-that’s what I was saying-” You’re catching croaked-out snatches of conversation, warily eyeing the way the men clap each other supportively on their backs.“-it’s about the right time don’t you think?”
Another one nods, “Jin has been waiting for so long, after all-”
“-yes yes, to have an heir-”
Oh.
That’s what had Choso’s high cheekbones currently dusted with a faintly blossoming rose pink. That’s what had his thickened digits dipping past your luxurious evening yukata to rover between your thighs higher, and higher- like he didn’t even realize what he was doing.
Like he was yearning for it.
“The Kamo clan shall have an heir.” You’re interrupting their ramblings, the mere sound of your voice enough to make Choso’s fingertips twitch. Smooth skin prickling with heaps of goosebumps already when you lock eyes right with his. “As soon as my husband is ready, right?”
And Choso Kamo was brought up with the most rigorous of training, raised to never show even the barest flicker of emotion - especially one where he’s caught off guard.
But right now he knows that he looks as stunned as he feels.
Coral pink maw falling into a soft oh! dark whirlpools of his eyes glinting with something so utterly raw. The trembling tips of his fingers lurch up just the barest inch to drag a lazy line down your pussymound.
He’s instantaneously shifting his free hand up in one, fluid motion to cover the feverishly flushed half of his face. Jaw clenching with a sharp click! of his teeth when he swipes the fat pad of his thumb down a fresh bead of your leaking slick, making such a flimsy mess of your drenched panties. Was this all for him?
Because now Choso’s getting…greedy.
And you’re almost letting off a slight whimper when he hastily drags his scouring hand away - that is, before every and any sound dies in your throat once your husband dips his wetted thumb past his lips and sucks.
Subtly.
And his voice cracks oh-so-pathetically, “R-right.”
Eyes staring deeply into yours when he parts his doughy fingertips mere millimeters to lather it with a fat wad of saliva. Your breath hitches in your chest, frantically glancing at the babbling group of men who were, thankfully, way too absorbed in themselves to notice your little…tryst.
And it’s only with all his years as a seasoned fighter that Choso’s nuzzling his soaked digits back between your jittery thighs. In a flash.
Planting exactly three soppy smack! smack! smacks! plapped onto the perfect arch of your drooling pussy. Choso’s raising his neat brows at just how those tremors make you squirm in your seat.
“Ch-Cho—so-” You’re gasping under your breath, hips repeatedly shuffling on your cushiony chair when he licks up repeated, sultry circles- no, wait, hearts along the slippery slit of your covered cunt. Up and down. “Th-they might see…”
“Shhh, don’t want them to hear, baby.” He’s leaning in to pant out a murked cloud against your ear, throat bobbing with a ravenous swallow of saliva as he then probes a few stuffy fingers under your panties. “You seem stressed– Let me take care of it.”
Oh, it was a promise - and the rasping growl that bled into Choso’s tone told you that he was well and fully intent on accomplishing his little task. “Spread those pretty legs now.”
With a steady, muscular calf hooked with your own, he’s cracking your thighs evermore parted. The scorching hot press of his big, beefy forearm over your shoulders making you feel as if you’re on the verge of melting. Practically on his lap now-
“Is everything alright, master–?” You’re hearing from what sounds like somewhere over in the distance, even though you already know that it’s from right in front of you.
“Everything is quite alright.” Choso’s plush pecs vibrate with his rapid answer, and you’re finding yourself leaning your weight onto his. Huffing and puffing near the crook of his neck, “It seems the madam is just feeling a little ah…tired, right now. Continue your talk, elders.”
Tired - you couldn’t feel more riled up if you even tried.
“Ngh- Choso-” You’re sinking your teeth into your wobbly lower lip, hard enough to draw blood. High, carved chair singing off a slight creak! when you’re bucking your hips up to jostle his gluttonous fingers closer to where you wanted him the most. “-need you.”
Well, whatever his wife wanted - you got.
In simple nanoseconds, Choso’s snugly prying away your gauzy lace. Letting the too-thin fabric snap back against your sappy cunt with a teasing little swat!
Before you can blink, he’s gracing your panties with microscopic tears at just how eager he was to give your plump, buttony clit a good, hard push. Cold golden wedding ring perking up against your most tender spots. Flexible wrists bending towards an even vulgarly deep angle to keep you from escaping-
And you think you could scream, you think you could open your mouth to make a scene - before Choso beats you to it. Purring out an oblivious, “Is everything alright, my wife? You seem a little feverish.”
All the while slipping n’ sliding his fingerpads to smear your gluey pussylips open. Mazing down, down, down in a lecherous little pace to plug up your geysering entrance snugly full with two of his fattened digits.
You’re clutching helplessly onto Choso’s thick yukata sleeve when the elders stare over at you curiously, “I-I’m fine, Ch- my husband. Just a few post-wedding jitters.”
“Awww, that’s alright.” He’s cooing from above you, words sugarcoated with such gentleness - but his hands were anything but. “M’here, m’here.” Setting out a vicious, ceaseless pace that has his manly fingers outlining numerous circles round n’ round your tight, flooding entrance. Motioning in slight, sleazy swirls all around your elastic hole just to fit inside properly. “Your dear Choso’s here, y’know? And I’ll take such good care of you.”
“Ah! Of course-” Ring out the replies, evidently your hurried-out shudders were not enough for your guests to lose interest. Or for Choso, either - because he’s just feeding your slobbering orifice with more fat inches upon grinding inches. “-producing an heir is a very integral part of the marriage contract. It’s understandable to be nervous.”
Shivering, “S-sure.”
“Mhm—” Choso’s trawling his pouted mouth down your perspiration-simmered temple, “-a very integral part. But, of course, we’ve got to make sure that my beloved wife is-” Quirking the very edge of his digits to clash right into the target of your g-spot. “-ready, after all.”
The clingy embrace of your warm cunt so cozy that it’s bumping Choso’s metallic ring further and further from his hilled knuckles to dredge out a chilling, languid massage along your channel.
It takes everything in you to manage up a half-heartedly narrowed glare up at your chatting husband, easily conversing his way through every battering ram being placed on your pretty pussy.
He doesn’t make a sign - he doesn’t even make a noise. Nothing except for a sharp, sudden inhale once another innocent peck at your lips makes your filthy hole fountain out a fresh lather of sickly sweet juices.
Dripping all the way down to his wrist with thickly viscous adhesive, he’s making such a fucking mess. And a loud one, too.
Slurp after slurp being wrenched out with every pound of his neatly cut nails patterning out little indents onto your most favorite spots - ones that have your legs shaking underneath the humid table. Choso’s bouncing his knee to drum out a staccato against the floor, just to cover up your cute little melody.
He has you going insane.
You’re pushing apart your legs to dig into either side of your chair with just how desperate you were for him. For more more more.
Bumping your thigh against one of his, and the mere touch is enough to send shockwaves down Choso’s sloped body.
“Trying to tease me, baby?” He’s hovering over you even closer, darting out a hefty thud! of two fingertips- no, three - when did he even bully in another one - onto the goopy roof of your cunt.
“M’not-” You’re biting out, head lolling ever-so-slightly backwards when Choso furrows his brows and pumps out copious thrusts that hit your forbidden g-spot dead on. Engulfed so deeply inside your hot core that the gentle curves of his palm smudge against your clit now. “J-just keep- talking.”
And, truly, it wasn’t just because your company was peering over the two of you expectantly - it was because Choso sounded so very hot.
Vibrato husky with an animalistic sort of need, tremoring ever-so-slightly-
“Agreed, I would like a few sons and daughters.” Choso’s nodding along smoothly, although his full attention is focused on you. His wife. And the way your sweltering hot gummy walls clench around his bludgeoning fingers even tighter at the words. Faster. “Maybe three. Maybe five. Although, it’s up to the madam.”
In the corner of your eye, you’re catching them all staring at you, and you urgently force out a nod.
“C’mon now, answer them using your words like a big girl, why don’t you–?” He’s humming, tilting your burning face up. Faster. So that you can’t hide.
Lilting shrill just as unbalanced as your head was, “Y-yes-”
But of course, that wasn’t enough - that would never be enough. “Louder. They can’t hear you over the music, baby.”
Can’t do anything but claw down drawings of red, red lines all across Choso’s milky arms when he bustles into the targets of your honeyed spots even harder. Unsteady syllables spilling out from your lip before you can even register them, “Yes- yes. As…many as possible.”
“That’s it- good girl.”
Fuck.
And those raked scratches make perfect artwork for him to admire - just as he was admiring you right now.
It was just such a shame that the others here were, too, even if they didn’t know the complete and utter sin happening just underneath the table cloth. Sloppier.
Choso’s kissing his teeth, broad deltoids of his shoulder positioning to hide you away from any sleazy gazes. Because they could be near, but they couldn’t see. You were his.
“Then, it’s settled-” He’s drawling, hooded eyes locked onto you. Memorizing your every minute twitch and reaction when he urges his free hand to hold onto yours on your lap. Or, at least, that’s what it looked like to the outside. In fact, Choso’s snugly prying apart your silken robes to roll over your throbbing clit and pinch. “-we can look forward to an heir, soon. Right, madam?”
And that’s all it takes for you to cum.
Your head tucking into his sculptured shoulder, thighs closing with a dull clap! as your high crashes into you headfirst. You don’t need to mutter a single sentence for Choso to know.
For his eyes to widen just a fraction at the way your treacly slit only got infinitely dewier, rounded gumdrops of your slick sprinkling down in a weepy sheen all over his messy hands. Mouth going parched at the realization that you’re orgasming right here, right now.
“O-oh? Seems my wife agrees.” Choso’s waving those elders away now, not taking his eyes off of you for a single second. It was just too adorable how you were shaking like a leaf at his side, “Well, m’glad. So- so…glad.”
Motioning your hips in such salacious semi-circles to bump up his upright fingers against your every extra sweet orifice.
Your sticky walls were so staggeringly tightly wrapped around him that it’s making his forehead bead with sweat, low puffs of air escaping with every peak he fucks you through. Every peak of white-hot pleasure that he draaags out until your guests are finally - finally - walking back to their own tables.
“Sh-shit-” you’re mewling when Choso barely hesitates - barely even takes a quick sweep around the room to check who might be looking - before parting from your sappy cunt with a resounding squelch!
Immediately popping those viscously-glazed fingerpads into his starved mouth, he’s letting his glassy eyes sprint to the back of his head. Musing out a moan, “Fuck- fuck!”
You can only watch with an awed gape whilst Choso stares right into your heart-shaped pupils as he cleans himself off. One by one. Before trekking his lustrous fingers back over to your cunt, and measuring out a wide few inches - perhaps nine - from the base of your teary entrance up to your tummy.
“Choso…” you’re whispering, hazy eyes blinking up at him as if through molasses. “Wha’s that for?”
And Choso only grins, stray range of knuckles thoroughly bitten underneath his gleaming canines while he measures you up.
As if he was holding back. Keeping himself sane. And the half-lided greed in Choso’s eyes told you that he’d fuck you all proper right here and right now if he could. “N-nothing- just making sure of somethin’, my wife. Making sure that you can take me.”
Oh.
This was far from over. You were fucked.
And you were completely and utterly sure of it even if the topic of an…heir didn’t come up for the next few days after that.
Not that you didn’t think about it, though - it was hard not to, when your fatally notorious husband showed such a tender side of himself with his younger brothers.
With you.
And soon enough even through all the bustling meetings and duties of a madam, you’re still figuring out a way to tell Choso that you really weren’t kidding about what you said during that wedding reception.
Sure, you were drunk on his fingers but - that wasn’t just all, was it?
But you’d sorely underestimated just how busy a clan leader could get. And before you knew it, putting off the conversation for the morning after your wedding night had turned into putting it off for the weekend.
Then putting it off for next week. Two weeks.
All the way until you’re trudging along the winding corridors of the Kamo Estate during the most unholy hours of the night. Grumbling groggily to yourself about how you’d finally told him and it had ended supremely well - in a dream, that is.
Choso had been absent for almost the entire day today, attending an important land negotiation with a far-off clan, according to Jin.
Now, you knew just how powerful your husband was - it was impossible to escape the legends and rumors, in fact - and you trusted him. Still, you couldn’t help but toss and turn the entire night away in your coldly empty bed as you wondered just how safe he would get home.
You’d been to such veiled conferences before, after all.
And it’s simply pure worry that has you dragging yourself out of your king-sized bed to shuffle into the barely-lit kitchen. Stifling half-blindly in the moonlight through cabinets and coolers to find ah! Exactly what you’ve been looking for.
Thank goodness this place was empty right now, you didn’t know if you could handle it if the chef was here to lecture you about balanced diets when you’re bites deep into your sugary, shaved icing.
And it’s exactly with this thought in mind that you hear a loud thud! emanating from the far end of the hallway. Your eyes widen, ears searching for more-
Footsteps.
At this time? Your fingers itch towards the sparkling display of knives tucked in one corner of the granite counter. Ready to aim for that tall approaching shadow, ready to fling just as Choso had taught you when-
“Baby?”
“Oh–” Your breath comes out in a heavy gust of relief, eyes unable to tear away from the shaded outline of your husband, taking up every inch of the doorway. “It’s just you, Cho.”
It was. But there was something about Choso that seemed…different. Off.
But not in a bad way - your eyes rover appreciatively over the tautly flexed muscles of his upper half, peeking out almost-blasphemously where he’d shrugged the upper half of his deep purple yukata off.
Glinting bow and arrow stained with crimson, held in one tightly-gripped hand. Your nose wrinkles at the slight, dangerous scent of something metallic. Something not his.
Yet, you can’t help but ogle the slow path of dewdropped sweat trailing down between the curvaceous bulge of his heaving pecs, bumping up and down over his washboard abs, before disappearing below-
It’s like you’re being bolted with an instant flash of lightning as soon as this happens, snapping your eyes over to find Choso’s weighty ones. And oh- the moment you do it’s like something in him melts.
THUD!
You’re jumping when his weapons hit the floor - uncaring of whether this might alert anyone else in the household, uncaring of anything other than crossing the sizzling distance between the two of you in three urgent strides.
You don’t even have the time to process it before Choso halts right before you and falls to his knees. Dark lashes fluttering up at you, he echoes, “Baby.”
Like a broken little mantra.
“Ch-Choso- baby-” It’s just about the only thing you can manage out through hollowed gasps when he’s immediately digging two hands on either side of your hips to easily and pliably seat you on the icy counter. Just where he wanted. “-what’s gotten into you?”
“Dunno.” He’s garbling out, and you’re letting your boneless legs tumble further and further open to let him bury his face right at his favorite place - into your fluttering cunt. “Was jus’ thinking about you alllll day.”
And you could tell.
Because Choso’s every movement was depraved. Jerky. His sensory fingertips trembling when they card underneath your cottony sleep garments, bringing it up to his canines to rip–!
All with his mouth.
“Fuh-fuck-” You’re squealing at the sudden hit of cold air - followed very closely by a scorching hot breeze overtaking every inch of your cunt when Choso leans in and sniffs. Long, hard. Curdling out a feral keen at the back of his throat, “-that’s so filthy, baby.”
“Nothing’s filthy for me if s’you, madam.” At the glint of something slobbering and sharp, you can tell that he’s grinning. “If s’you or…her.”
He was enamored with your ready core, curving a gentle thumb down the glossy edges to give your driveling hole a good trickle of spittle.
And Choso Kamo knew he had perfect aim - he knew he didn’t have to make a mess.
But oh, he couldn’t keep himself from tilting his head just degrees to the side to let the splatters leave dripping wet splotches down your saturated folds, your inner thighs.
Tongue so long, lolling out drunkenly to smear away that filthy excess. He’s poking heated ounces again and again back into your soppy entrance. You were practically flooding torrents of sweet, sweet juices around him, already making a mess that lacquers his dimpled chin.
You were always so sweet - so good for him. And he can feel his ears pop already with the greedy anticipation of what he was craving to do.
“Think you missed me, too.” He’s snickering, teeth sinking down onto the fleshy nub of your clit. It’s enough to make you want to sob. “Didn’t ya?”
Gyrating your hips in such hypnotizing little swivels off of the smooth counter, you’re feeling his candied breaths hit your gummy walls even deeper. Sloppier. Whimpering out, “Yes- yes. Missed you so badly, Cho–”
“Oh yeah?” He’s tensing up the dexterous edge of his tongue to swipe up unhurried skids of his roughened tastebuds around and around your quivering entrance. In and out. Syrupy slick leaking in heaps right as he does, Choso tilts his head back to let those gooey masses slide down his throat. “Mmm— you’re wetter than usual, baby. How badly do you want the ngh- clan leader on his knees for you, hm?”
It was true - and Choso can feel something coiling and coiling heatedly at the base of his stomach at the idea of giving you perhaps…a kid…or two to make sure you’re not so lonely anymore.
Ah, he was pussydrunk.
“So- too badly.” You don’t think you’d ever be babbling away like this if Choso wasn’t making out with your needy cunt like that.
You’re tangling your fingers hastily into his dark, silken locks - gripping desperately onto his sweat-dampened scalp as you use up all your strength and push. All the way until the very tip of Choso’s button nose was meeting your pulsing clit in a harsh smooch, his chin smacking the teary ends of your cunt.
Words tremoring against the very outer ring of your puffy pussy, silvery strings of saliva n’ sap break off when Choso mutters, “Was talkin’ to her, y’know?”
Fuck.
And you think you would be huffing and puffing about how he was talking with your dousingly wet cunt instead of you.
That is, if you weren’t talking back to him from between your legs.
Because the only thing louder than the slack-jawed ah! ah! ah! leaving your lips with every repeated thrust of Choso’s tongue, was the sound of your soppy squelches. “Ohhh- so that’s how your day was? Tell me more…”
So loud - so embarrassing that you can feel your heart race.
And Choso’s was, too, but for a much more lecherous reason as his tongue clashes even harder to draw out those very same pretty noises from you. He was craning his ears closer - he was addicted.
“Yeah- yeah, tha’s right.” Choso’s groaning, eyes faltering droopily until they were almost shut at the way his husking growls only make you wetter. Well, he could help with that. Hitting your hot core with wad after weighty wad of even more sugary spit. “Thaaaat’s fuckin’ right, missed how mouthy you hah- are. My talkative girl.”
“Cho- ngh!” You’re biting down on your tongue to hold back your words when Choso raises up a hand to leave a solid spank right on your bloated pussymound.
He’s nodding along, head lurching intoxicatedly ever closer and closer. Wiping away a glistening streak of slick painted over his blushing cheeks - his blushing cheeks. “That’s right- would’ve made a- haaaah- a whole lotta b-better points than that stupid council does.”
Before pecking a lingering French kiss on your throbbing clit like a lover would.
And you count one, two, three- partway through four before Choso seems to remember that he’s still in the middle of his conversation with your cute cunt. It’s rude to leave her hanging, he’s pondering.
“Well-” Stringing himself away with such a pained grunt, cerise lower lip plumping out in a pout at the mere thought of being away from you. “-better points than that stupid council d-did. They won’t be making aaaaany comments ‘bout you anymore, madam.”
Your leaden eyelids struggle to flitter open, “Wh-what do you ngh- mean, baby?”
But the only response you get is a quick staccato of swats at your leaky slit, before Choso’s curling in a thick thumb past your watering lips and in to your slicked entrance. Followed by the delicious drag of his lengthy tongue doubly slipping back inside.
Thrust after thrust.
So extensive that he was skimming across all your ridges, mapping out every sweet spot of yours on his mouth. Your adhesive walls were clinging onto him like a vice, sappy mushes making him pry apart your thighs even more through furrowed brows.
“Jus’- just means-” He can’t even bear to speak. To break off from stretching you staggeringly open. Your legs wrap mindlessly around Choso’s ravenous head, “-means I don’t let anyone- hah- say anythin’ about my wife.”
Without a second thought, your eyes find his splayed-out arrows on the floor. The way they were sullied with red…
Oh.
But you couldn’t bring yourself to do anything other than let your head jerk backwards, muffing out slight whimpers when he alternates in such sloppy measures between swirling the fattened expanse of his tongue all over every possible spot of your gummy walls and sucking on your clit like his favorite candy.
“They won’t say- do- anythin’—” In so deep now that all you could make out were numerous wet gurgles. And the pure, unadulterated love in Choso’s tone when he twists his thumb to graze right against your bruised and battered g-spot. Hard. “Not when I love her so much.”
He’s gonna raise your kids to love you just as damn much.
And when you cum, you think you might be sobbing - you’re shaking.
Flurries of stars bursting behind your eyes as you dig your fingers through your husband’s perspired strands. Keening out, “Fuck- m’cumming- m’cumming–”
“I know I know.” He smirks hotly against your puffy pussy lips, so close that you could feel the cratered dimple of his grin. “Yer cute cunt told me, baby– heh- wouldn’t mind being welcomed ah- home by my wife like this every day.”
He lets himself be manhandled, pulled and pushed to your every whim. One of the strongest clan leaders whimpering - whimpering - when you pull just a bit too hard to mash his cushiony mouth in a deeper kiss.
Hot. Sappy.
You’re still shaking with sparking bouts of heat that rush down and up your spine, legs twitching when Choso pulls away with a loudly kissed mwah! Overly exaggerated just to see that shy, fucked-out expression on your face.
He was so unfairly pretty like this - a delicate red blush burning all over his face, eyes half-lidded like he was feverish. A shimmery spray of your juiced slick drips down his chin, his bruised lips, all the way up to his regal cheekbones.
He made a mess. And he was wearing it like a badge of honor.
Rising up, up, up to shutter your ajar jaw and plant a drenching kiss. Choso always left your mind so melty and stupid no matter what he did.
“Do you…do you want some hngh- sh-shaved ice?” You’re babbling with your cottony tongue, unsure of what exactly to say after something as intense as…that.
“Nah-” One kiss. Another Two. Five. “-I jus’ had something a whooole lot sweeter, madam.”
Right now it was so quiet in your kitchen. Just you, Choso, and the gleaming moonlight illuminating his pussydrunken enchantment. Even more so than usual.
You’re glissading your arms around his sweat-matted neck, reeling him in even closer. He smells so good, piney cologne searing your senses even despite that tint of iron. Nervously musing, “Hmmm, wonder if s’always gonna be like hah- this whenever I get…cravings.”
Well- it wasn’t exactly what you wanted to say, but, better than nothing.
“Cravings, huh?” Choso’s eyes twinkle - and you’re not sure if that’s a result of the muted lighting or because of what you just said. Hopefully the latter.
“Well- well just saying I wouldn’t mind if-”
Cutting yourself off, you’re sure it’s the latter when he rests a massive palm, warm against your tummy. Just for a split-second before tucking his big, strong arms underneath your body and propping you in an easy princess carry. “If you have cravings then I’d be the one cooking for ya, my wife. 24/7, at your feet.”
Yeah, you were fucked.
But you never really realized just how much - just how badly - until just a few days later; seated on the polished hardwood floor of the famed Kamo archery dojo.
It was routine for your husband to practice his pinpoint precise shooting, and by now it was your routine to watch him.
How could you not? Because it was such a heavenly sight.
Choso’s pristine, white yukata unravelled at one muscular shoulder; showing off the rippling curves and dips of his sculptured back. Strong. His honed eyes filmed with a focus he only ever gets in bed. Adonis-like biceps bulging in a lecherous little flex when he draws the string back, back, back and lets go-
“YES!” Yuji’s resounding cheer thunders across the vast chamber with way too much volume than a six-year-old should possibly have. “Let’s goooo- big bwother hit the target again.”
A simpering smile stretches across your lips as soon as he turns to you for reassurance, gesturing out a slow nod at the way Choso keeps piercing bullseye after bullseye. “He did, your brother is very talented, Yuji.”
Humming, “When I grow up m’gonna be just like him.”
“Of course.” You’re chuckling at his enthusiasm - the youngest of your husband’s brother’s always did have a special spot in your heart. And you can’t help but wonder when - if - you had an heir with Choso, whether they would be much the same. “You are his brother, after all.”
You’re frantically hovering your hands behind him once he bustles to a haphazard stand. Stumbling only a few times as he races over to the neat line of inventory, “Then- I’ll be just like him now.”
“Be careful!”
Ah, he really was a handful - which meant, you really didn’t expect it to go over perfectly smoothly. You’d known that simply wouldn’t have been possible as soon as you met Itadori Yuji.
Yet, you didn’t expect everything to go so wrong in just a mere matter of seconds.
Before you can even blink, Yuji’d tottered his way over to one particularly large, wooden bow - one used only by Ryomen Sukuna whenever he visited. Puffing out his chest as he reeled out the massively heavy weapon - overly heavy, way too much for even the most determined child-
CRASH!
“Yuji!” You don’t know who yelps louder - you, or Choso. But with your proximity, you’re the one that reaches him first, cradling the sniffling boy in your arms.
You jostle away the weighty bow - honestly, how he even managed to lift this in the first place you have no idea.
“Awww, don’t cry don’t cry–” You’re cooing, distantly registering the worried pants of his older brother skidding to a stop beside you. He always did have him curled around his little finger. Pushing away the pinkish curls from his forehead, “-you’re alright. See? You’re alright.”
“Are you hurt? Are you dizzy? Are you feeling nauseous-”
“Choso.” You warn, catching the way Yuji’s eyes widen in panic.
Taking a few deeply necessary breaths to calm down. “You- don’t do that-” Choso’s hissing, but you could practically feel the worry seeping into his tone. Thumbing slow circles on his aching shoulders, “-ask me for a bow instead.”
You have to bite back a grin - with the watery glaze taking over his eyes, you wondered who was really hurt - Yuji or Choso himself.
“M’sorry big bwother.” Blubbering through big, pearly tears that dry salty streaks down his chubby cheeks. He’s batting those lashes in a way you’re sure gets him out of any sort of trouble. Ever. The full, merciless force of it hits your poor heart as Yuji turns to you. “Sorry, mama.”
Mama.
Mama.
You freeze. Choso freezes.
Hell, even the twittering birds outside freeze mid-song.
It seems like everyone in the entire world freezes except for an oblivious Yuji who only continues inching his tiny hands closer towards that guilty bow. Clearly not having learned his lesson - but you didn’t even register that right now.
You’re staring at Choso, only to find that he’s staring right back. Droopy eyes uncharacteristically wide, blinking rapidly - it didn’t even look like he was breathing right now.
Maw parting and closing stupidly agape, and you’re almost tempted to reach out and check whether he’s doing okay - before he finally finds his voice again. Finally. Husking out a choked-out, “W-well- maybe we should- ah- should-” He’s turning towards his contrastingly okay younger brother, “Yuji?”
“Big bwother!” Comes the, unfortunately, helpless answer.
And something in his beaming expression seems to jolt Choso out of his reverie, something that makes him let out a tight nod. Scooping up the giggling boy over his shoulder, he calls out at you, “Wait here.”
As Choso walks out of the doorway, you could only watch.
Only sit there for what could be four seconds - or maybe even four hundred years - until he’d presumably dropped off Yuji at the safety of Jin. Taking steady, focused strides back to you that thud! thud! thud! right along to the beat of your racing heart.
Choso’s expression is blank - pale as if he’s seen a fucking ghost. And he doesn’t even look at you, can’t even bear to once he walks back to the thickened air of the dojo. Now pointedly alone.
Very, very alone.
Wordlessly, he picks up his famed bow. And you swear that you can see his practiced hands tremble. Something was happening.
It’s like an artwork that you can’t look away from. The fluid motion of aligning a singular arrow to aim for his final, rounded target. Doughy pads of his fingers pinching the string back, back, back until it snaps!
And misses. For the first time in years.
“Fuck.”
You barely have the time to compute - to even suck in a gasp of surprise before your husband comes and crashes into you. It’s as if he was magnetized and couldn’t get away even if he wanted to.
It’s a frenzy of white billowing sleeves and powerful arms, throwing you over Choso’s shoulder in only two seconds flat - much the same way that he’d done with Yuji moments prior.
Except more…urgent.
“Choso- Cho!” You’re squealing, as he lurches into hurried treads away. Legs kicking weakly in the air, only for your stubborn self to be granted with an unapologetic spank! right on the mound of your ass. Your nose crinkles as his long, inky locks tickle your face, “What is-”
“Be quiet.” Choso’s rasping, so small that it could not have been more than a whisper. So close that you’re drinking in heady wafts of his masculine cologne.
Something in his snarling tone makes your stomach tighten. Digits grappling precariously onto the toned curves of his shoulders, your fingertips slide down the sweltering expanse of his exposed skin.
And only too late do you recognize the familiar pathway towards your shared bed chamber- oh.
So that was what it was.
And judging by the dark, primal look swimming in the clan leader’s eyes you could only hope that you made it out alive-
SLAM!
You don’t know what’s forcing you more out of your excited little reverie - the shuddered slam! of your mahogany double doors, so hard that it makes the golden hinges shake, or the way you’re thrown haphazardly on the bed.
Like some glorified toy. One of Choso’s favorites.
You’re throwing your arms over his broad shoulders as you fall, lugging him in even closer with each springy bounce on the bedcoils.
But closer wasn’t close enough for your husband - he’s bullying into every ounce of your personal space, caging you in between two splayed-out palms on either side of your thoroughly spinning head.
“Mama, is it?” Choso starts out. Slow. Thick. Like he was approaching a cornered prey. “Baby, I want…I want it.”
You’re blinking up at him through eager eyes, “Want what, Cho?”
“I want an heir. I want to make you…” He gulps. The circles of his fingertips were so warm on your skin, trailing down lovingly all across your cheek. Your collarbones, your heaving tits - down to where you predictably flinched as he palmed your tummy. “-a pretty momma.”
Fawny strands of chestnut brown curtain his gaze, but you could tell just how serious he was. Just how greedy. You don’t think you’ve ever seen Choso like this in his entire life.
All you can breathe out is a crackling, “Yes.”
You said it. You finally said it after all these weeks.
And it’s the only thing you hear before your yukata is all but torn off of you, Choso doesn’t even realize when he’s doing so. It’s melting away like butter underneath his strength, mere obstacles to where the real prize is - your gorgeous, shivering body.
Pebbles of goosebumps rise onto the surface of your flesh when he throws away those useless pieces of fabrics onto the tatami floor - you can have more newly tailored anyway. Many, many more with just how round and full you’re about to be very soon.
He’d take care of it for you.
“Oh, madam- madam.” He’s spitting into your unfastened mouth, low growls sounding out across each four corners of your room. Held hostage by the arousal in your eyes, he can’t stop staring. “M’gonna ruin you.”
And Choso is feral like never before.
Usually one to take his time during sex, finetuning you into it like a sultry waltz. His favorite hobby was to drive you mindlessly wild before he even thought of stuffing you full. But now…
Still not breaking his dreamy eye contact with you, Choso hooks a rapidfire finger over the cute bow-tied hem of your panties. Slurring down an oozing little snail trail of slick that laminates your jittery thighs with evidence of just how badly you wanted him.
You feel the blistering pant of his mindless oh! fanning your features, leaning backwards with a loosened maw to admire just how glistening you are in this lighting.
How ready.
With a low, fucked-up whimper breaking at the back of his throat, he rubs over the bloated curvature of your needy pussy. Slipping ever-so-slightly at the saturated puddles leaking out, Choso has no hesitation or shame when he tugs his fingerpads into his mouth once.
Twice. Thrice.
Dipping back down for more and more and more-
“Can’t-” He’s guttering out, eyes crinkling and- fuck, were those tears? “I c-”
You reach your hand up to smear away his hot rivulets of salt, and Choso stops his prattling like a broken record forced to a halt. He jolts as if your touch has just sent a zillion shocks of voltage down his spine, all the trekking trailway down to his furious, aching cock.
Unsteady hands flinging apart his snowy robes - barely even bothering to remove them and wrench down his undergarments before you see it. You finally understand why Choso was so…restless.
Because he’s never been harder.
Fuck being furious, his bawling cock was seething. Equally as red as the ripest of strawberries, the split-ended crown of his cockhead was just as plumply swollen. All proud inches nestled underneath his painfully-clenching breeder balls, ballooned and lush. Only the barest of your gaze is enough to make Choso’s lustrous tip twitch, laminating himself with a freshly dripping glaze of translucent pre.
Though, it’s not like you were doing any better.
Your gluey lips pucker and pout up at him once he’s wrangling your legs into a boneless hold. The feeling of his palms underneath your thighs are so soft - even despite his battle-hardened calluses. Worshipping.
But the way he’s resting your legs on his shoulders, and folding you in half like a whining lawnchair is the complete opposite. Mercilessly into a-
“M-mating press-” Choso’s getting out through strangled breaths, as if the sole words had his poor sanity fraying at the edges. “-mating press- a- a-” Something he’s never tried out before. His head dips down, pearls of sweat simmering across his trembly upper lip as soon as your sticky folds leave a wet snog on his fattened mushroomy tip. Topping it with a generous heap of honeyed sap, “Well, hello there, baby. I have you in a mating press n’ m’gonna…gonna…”
He couldn’t even finish his sentence.
Couldn’t even finish his thought before Choso was doing - body moving miles and miles ahead of his stupidly saccharine-sweet mind.
“F-fuuuuck–” You’re letting off the keenest of whines, the edges of your nails leaving neat crescents all over his toned back. It was the perfect little present for the way he had you so split open.
And he was barely even pushing past the tip.
“Oh. Oh.” Choso’s grunts are throaty, as if they weren’t coming from the man himself but somewhere murked and dark inside him. And the same went for his feverish thrusts - tight, rigid little pushes past your slicked-up hole just to fit inside. He’s spitting into your slacked mouth, “C’mon- c’mon c’mon–”
Usually, it takes so long to prepare you to take his nine- no, ten inches. But currently, fast just wasn’t fast enough.
There’s a thundering slam! abovehead - only hours and hours later do you have enough brainpower to realize that it was Choso striking his palm down on the headboard - and it makes your clingy walls grip onto the battering mountain of his dewy head.
Squeezing in a repeatedly adhesive-like tempo, Choso’s nose crinkles at the rubbery resistance of your snug hole. Still molding to the slightest curves and ridges of his drowned slit with every desperate rut-
“Please- take it- fucking take it.” His voice was trembling on the edge of a crack, thickened exactly the way one does when he’s about to cry. “H-how can I fuck! How can I breed ya…if I don’t-”
And you’re swearing you see his ruddied cheeks glisten with a few slipped-off tears - though, that just might be from the way that your own vision mists over when his stray hand plugs up your spilling entrance to pry two thickened, scissoring digits inside and stretch. “Fucking- take that big fuckin’- cock-”
Bullying in a few more long n’ girthy inches- You’re so full that it feels like Choso’s pushing his bloated crownhead against the spongy edges of your lungs.
The bed dips and moans with frequent soft creaks! when he plants his curved knees firmly further apart. Flexibly so. And you’re getting a good, greedy eyeful of his pale, bulky thighs - angling at the perfect bend to snap his slender hips and jackhammer-
“Sh-shit-” Your head sinks into the cushiony pillows underneath you, and it already feels like you’re in heaven. “-don’t- don’t know if it’ll fit, Cho–”
With a bitten lip, Choso rovers down his sturdy hand from the surface of the bedframe to measure out ten solid inches. Bringing it down much the same way he did during your wedding reception, “Y-you can, baby–”
“But-”
“You will.” He’s gasping, gracing you with a soft brush of his curvaceous mushroomed head along one of your utmost favorite hidden sweet spots. It’s enough to make you buck. “Gonna take my cock, n’ you’re gonna haaah- take my seed ‘ntil you’re bloated. So I’ll make it fit- fuck- watch, I’ll make it fit.” Before you know it, that very same hand finds itself crowning your head, threatening to push you down- “C-can you say hngh- ‘biiiig stretch’ f’me?”
You’re hiccuping out, “B-big stretch?”
“Nuh uh-” By the time that Choso shakes his head, you’re being sprinkled with loose flecks of his sweat. He was in so deep now. “Say it with me- b-biiig stretch, baby–”
“B-biiig- stretch!” It takes you everything in your body to hold your own against the vicious pounds being planted and struggled into your goopy depths. Choso was determined. Frenzied.
And god, the way you’re dumbly parroting his words is so hot. He can’t help but dollop out muggy icings of pre that slosh and swab at every nook and cranny inside you.
“Good girl.” Rewarding you with a slow heart being patterned right on the throbbing peak of your clit, the roughened edges of his fingertips rub you just right. Not too hard. Not too soft. Your husband nuzzles his flushed head into the havened crook of your clammy neck, “S-say it again, madam.”
“Biiig-”
Honestly, it’s a wonder you manage to get exactly two syllables out at all. Because soon enough, Choso’s taking your distracted few seconds to lace his fingers onto your scalp push. To bump his hips back until your geysering cunt was struggling around his fat, bulbous tip.
Before stuffing you full all the way in-
“Fuck- no.” Choso’s spitting out venomously against your thrumming pulse, sharp fringes of his teeth digging in animalistically. Bottomed out but still pushing and pushing- Slamming a lazy stripe of luscious precum down your spongy cervix, “No- no no–”
No sooner are you full of all his massive, rummaging length, he’s making you take even more. This time in the form of dribbling, ribbony volumes of cum that leak and leak and won’t stop from his heated divot.
It’s ballooning up your tight channel even more. Swashing around and sticking to your gummy walls like a treacly lacquer. Filling you to your very brim-
“S-so much.” You’re gaping, through tear-strung lashes. The shivering edges of your fingers subconsciously dance downwards to splotch over the puddling globs of seed tricking from either side of your sloppy slit. Squeezing out even more to coat Choso’s bulky base with creamy rings upon rings.
And, usually, your husband might be just a bit embarrassed. Usually, he would have pulled out to make out with your pretty pussy until your scores were more than tied.
But that wasn’t your husband right now.
“Don’t.” Choso clicks his drunkenly heavy tongue, lips pulling back into what almost looks like an oh-so-feral snarl. And you have to admit that it looks so sexy on him. He’s rudely swatting away your curious hand, “Move that fucking hand n’ let me see.”
It takes only a split-second for both your hands to be pinned underneath one of Choso Kamo’s.
“Tha’s not enough to take.”
And only one more split-second for him to flip you over onto your tummy and stuff your head into the cushy pillows.
He’s fucking you like he’s using you. Like he’s pumping his mushy, swollen head to nudge in the weighty heft of his cum deeper and deeper and deeper-
“Y’know I hate hngh- disrespectin’ my wife, baby–” He leans over to sigh against your ear in craving hisses, pinning you with his body. His muscles. You could count each n’ every one of Choso’s bulging abs, glissading damply against your perfectly arched spine. Bubblegum pink nipples pressed roughly into your scorching skin, “Hate it- but…”
You gasp at Choso’s audacity next - at the way it makes you so traitorously soaked when he hikes up one of his feet to rest upon your head.
Gurgling out a stupid. “Ch-Cho–”
But he didn’t seem to hear you - you didn’t know if he was even managing to breathe at this point. Only letting his devious lips twitch up, up, up into such a satisfied grin. “-but ‘ntil I get my hngh- heh…heir, you’re gonna hafta be my cumdump, madam.”
And if the saturated slurps singing out at a near-deafening tone from your dripping pussy said anything - it was that you loved the idea.
Especially when the changed angle makes his scouring cockhead maze between the most treasured spots of your jelly-like walls to strike numerous, merciless hits dead-set on your g-spot.
Ah, there it was, pipes up that small voice in Choso’s overtaken brain. Jostling your hips back onto his with a sudden spank on the target of your drivelling hole, the stinging pressure makes you bump your tenderest spots again and again into his ruthless batters.
It’s bruising - the proud circumference of his plummy cock against your elastic cervix with every recoiling bounce, the rounded patterns of his balls against the hind of your pretty pussy with each thrust.
If you didn’t think you were being fucked stupid before then you were sure now.
Your velveteen pillowcase dampens with the ever-flooding saliva spilling from your mouth every time Choso rears his aching shaft back to plant rapid, precise strikes where you wanted him the most.
Whimpering at how every ramming dab of his split cockhead leaves leakages of pearly white cum all over the bottom of your pussy. That sultry swirl of his dumped heaps inside of you making your head spin just as dizzily.
You almost don’t notice it when Choso’s drifting both hands to skirt over about halfway down your tummy. Feeling for that bloated, cylindrical outline of him vulgarly messing up your insides, “Gonna be e-even fuller here soon, y’know-” He’s giggling - giggling. Erratically letting his hands slide down to your clit to give the peaked ends just a tiny pinch. “-have you all round. Full. Full-”
He can’t say anything else.
He can’t do anything else - other than watch in purely entranced awe when that makes you cum all over his fucking cock.
So big n’ thick that your claggy walls can barely even squeeze around his throbbing shaft. The thought makes you huff as he rams rigorously through your blinding high - teeth grit, your fingers fist at the pillows and make sure you can clench-
When you do- oh, when you manage to cling your gummy cunt onto his girth as if to suck out his fucking soul, it makes Choso cum, too.
Fatigued hips somehow matching his cadence, your knees shiver on top of the softened mattress stuttering through every dousing mass of cum gliding inside your cute cunt. It was so heavy having his massive torrentials inside of you, spraying the door to your womb with a slippery sheen.
It was maddening.
And maybe it’s been hours - maybe it’s been mere minutes. But all you know is that you’re put through rounds and rounds and more rounds. But he’s still not stopping. Still dredging out the tiniest of hollowing grinds.
Until much, much later Choso’s breath hitches in feverish stutters. It was so steamily hot inside you, only getting more humid by the minute as you ride out yet another crashing high.
“G’na milk e-every ngh- drop-” He titters, fleshy edges of his fingers closing in around where your pussylips were the most buxom. The most leaky. “-n’ you’re gonna ngh- keep it. Keep ‘ntil you give me an h-heir. Remember that, baby– keep it.”
You’re fighting against the weight of his muscular leg on top of you. Was he clamming your pussy shut?
“Choso, baby.” Your straining out, throat drier than the Sahara at this point. Even despite how the hypnotized way your husband looks at you makes your tongue lather with watery saliva. “Want- want more.”
You think you might just have broken Choso Kamo.
Might just have made him reach another surprising high all over again with just your simple request. He’s lifting off the powerfully pressurized foot crowned on your head in favor of lurching downwards to grab your tender throat into a headlock.
Manhandling you as he pleased. Lifting you off of the tattered pillow, the completely splintered bed frame now.
Your chin juts over his thick, bulging biceps, fighting for both air and the space-
“More- more, she says-” He’s chuckling out, words cracking a few octaves higher than normal. From the corner of your eye, you sneak glimpses at the way that Choso’s eyes were wide, crazed. Flashing all sorts of feral promises when he plants one, two, three long thuds against your soppy cervix. “Fucking- m-more.”
You’re letting off a tiny whimper - your orgasm nothing but tingles at this point. Yearning for that the piping hot streak of seed flushed into your already-overspilling cunt. Syruping in with the rest of his numerous goopy volumes, it’s thick and needy.
Only one.
“Sh-shit.” He’s wheezing against your ear, free hand flying down to tug at his reddened base for more more more- one’s not enough. Every possibly wiry wisp and speckle that could fill you up. Could give him an heir. “Can’t cum dry- won’t- oh.”
Rutting into you like Choso won’t stop - didn’t know if he even can stop anymore. You flinch at the suddenly hot splatter! of something warm…and wet at your shoulder.
“Cho- oh!” Not only was the clan leader drooling out glossy spatters of saliva, he was crying. Hugging you even closer, you’re showered in neverending streams of overstimulated tears.
And Choso can only babble away, “Hope- hope s’a daughter, madam.”
A/N. AYYY y’all have been wanting more dom Choso saurrrr- Anyways hope you have a lovely week <3
#34: Mako and Bolin Find Their Family (K303, "The Earth Queen"/K304, "In Harm's Way")
From their first appearance as pro-bending teammates, our writers made it clear that Mako and Bolin were meant to be symbolic of the new multicultural reality of the Avatarverse, especially in the United Republic. But when they take a little side trip (and stumble, and fall) in Ba Sing Se and end up crossing paths with the Earth Kingdom side of their family, we find out exactly where in their background that strain of xenophilia comes from.
It seems that most of their miraculously rediscovered relatives—Cousin Tu, Uncle Chow, and Grandma Yin, among many others—are true-blue earthbenders. They’re proud of their toughness, their family fruit stand (however disgusting Mako may find it), and their endurance of Lower Ring living conditions that make Republic City look like paradise. And, rough life or no, they—or at least their eldest, most respected member—are absolutely loyal to the Earth Kingdom and its queen.
The only oddball, as Grandma Yin explains, was Mako and Bolin’s father San, who fought with his own father, left home for the excitement of Republic City, and married a Fire Nation girl… whose name he apparently didn’t bother to mention even in his letter to his parents. :P (Still hoping for a few more answers about her, especially if Book 4 includes a trip to the Fire Nation!)
The scene where they read their father’s letter, see their one family portrait, and leave Grandma Yin with a final (pleasantly color-contrasting) memento of her lost son is touching. But if there’s one thing the brothers learn from all this, it’s what makes them different and why they could never stay in Ba Sing Se, no matter how warm the welcome—and it has little to do with living conditions, since they’ve experienced far worse in Republic City.
It’s because Mako and Bolin are living evidence of change and the way the lines between nations are blurring, even if things are forced to stay the same in Ba Sing Se. As Mako implies when he mentions Korra, their mission is to help the Avatar as she works to manage that change for the good of everyone.
For now, San’s family accepts the boys extremely readily, especially when you consider the sheer number of people they already have to squeeze a tiny apartment. When Ba Sing Se falls to the Red Lotus, they’ll all have this chance encounter to thank for saving their lives.
if I am in any way shape or form supposed to feel conflicted about jeong jin man and whatever his connection to these bad bad people-- I'm sorry but that's not gonna happen. you've cast lee dong wook, my judgment is severely compromised. i watched him murder people in strangers from hell and couldn't get over how fluffy he looked. and now he's a soft-spoken guilt-ridden scarred-up badass raising his neice?!? nope, I'm sorry. i am losing my mind over whatever that cardigan-looking thing he was wearing in that scene in jian's apartment. i have been staring at his face for ten minutes and haven't caught a word of dialogue. he did that little huff and his hair floofed and I couldn't breathe.
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"Why are you leaving so suddenly?" You questioned, your voice bouncing off the tapestry that adorned the living room wall of your quaint shared apartment and the oak bookshelves filled with classics.
The comforting aroma of a simmering homemade tomato sauce filled the air, mingling with the sound of sizzling pans and the rhythmic chopping of crisp, fresh vegetables on the polished granite kitchen countertop.
Dressed in a worn-out apricot apron adorned with faded sunflower prints, your hands were occupied with diligently kneading the carefully prepared pasta dough for your dinner, a recipe passed down from your Italian grandmother.
All of a sudden, the living room's normal sounds—the soft purr of Gunpowder, his gray cat curled up on the plush Persian rug, the low drone of the television playing the evening news—were replaced by an eerie silence that made your skin crawl.
On turning, you noticed Honda in the midst of rushing preparations for departure. He was hunched over the suede couch, lacing up his sturdy boots, his face etched with stern concentration. Against the dimly lit backdrop of the room, his figure blended seamlessly, rendering him no more than a transient silhouette.
"Where exactly are you off to? And what's the urgency?" You signed, your hands dancing in the air while you leaned against the wooden door frame. A knot of unease formed in the pit of your stomach at the sight of his hasty departure.
His gaze met yours, a small, reassuring smile playing on his lips as he signed back, "I have to go. Jin-Man needs me. I can't disclose more for your safety. You know how it works."
He continued to pack his bag—a small duffel made of worn leather with patches on the corners and straps slung over one shoulder. As he did so, you caught sight of an old photograph falling out of the side pocket; it was of you both from what looked like a summer festival years ago, grinning widely under colorful umbrellas while balloons swelled around you both.
"But can't it wait until tomorrow? Is it really necessary to depart on the day that we get back together after several months?
The worn-out leather of the couch groaned under his weight as he rose, his tall figure casting a long shadow against the faded brown wallpaper.
Moving towards you, he avoided the cluttered coffee table littered with dog-eared magazines and discarded newspapers. His leather jacket, draped over the back of a nearby armchair, was quickly pulled on, the rusted zipper scraping against the silence of the room.
"No, it can't wait. But I'll be back in time for dinner. I promise." Even as he used a gentle swipe of his thumb to remove a stray splotch of tomato sauce from your cheek, his smile never left his face. “When I return, we can lounge on the couch, munching on popcorn and be engrossed in those old Hollywood classics you're so fond of. You can also show me your progress with that hacking project you've been working on. Maybe try not to fry the motherboard this time?"
"First of all, you better keep that promise. Second, I’ll hold you to it. Third, for your information, that was a one-time thing!"
"First, I will. It's a promise. And second, I remember it being a three-time thing." He chuckled, his laughter warm like a summer's day.
"Shut up. But tell me, why the secrecy? Why can't you share what's happening? Jin-Man usually keeps me in the loop when a mission comes up.”
Despite your persistent questioning, Honda remained resolute, his face as unreadable as a closed book. He gently loosened your grip on his arm. "Stop nagging me like Mama would. I can't divulge any details. It's not safe. But I need to go. Jin-Man needs me. Don’t you have any government sites to hack? Or do you plan on crashing our systems again?"
"Stop it, douchebag. You're being reckless. We need to tread with caution, especially now more than ever. You know that. And that was not my fault; their security was just… upgraded."
However, he simply shook his head as he smiled at your pout, pulling you into a warm embrace. The cold, hard metal of his brass knuckles, concealed in his pocket, pressed against your side. A chilling reminder of the danger that lay ahead. Yet you refrained from voicing your fears, choosing instead to hold him tight, the rhythm of your heartbeats synchronizing.
"Alright," you conceded, swallowing your protests, "at least take some food with you." Gesturing towards a Tupperware container on the table, filled with steaming eggs and a side of kimchi jeon—both staple dishes in your shared meals.
His eyes softened at your concern, and he took the offered container, pressing a quick kiss on your forehead before making his way towards the entrance.
As he neared the door, a rush of childhood memories invaded your mind. Sometimes you stayed up late whispering secrets under the covers; sometimes you felt his pain even when he was miles away, and sometimes you both fell off your bikes and ended up in the emergency room with scraped knees. They dubbed it the twin instinct, but to you, it was a lifeline, a warning system that alerted you when Honda was in danger.
"Honda, wait!" You called out, your voice echoing off the creaking wooden floorboards.
The desperation in your plea stirred Gunpowder from her sleep, her tail twitching softly against the worn-out rug as though caught in a dream of chasing unseen mice. Honda turned, his hand still on the doorknob, his eyes questioning in the pale afternoon light filtering through the gaps in the old blinds.
A knot of guilt twisted in the pit of your stomach, threatening to crawl out through your lips and fill the room with its bitter taste.
The two of you were caught in a moment where petty bickering had canceled all the plans you had carefully added to your shared agenda. Your hands, once intertwined in unity, had become unglued from one another, your fingers now tangled in the strands of hair sprouting from your head. The hateful words you once spat at each other—words that had plunged through the gaps of your milk teeth—had turned into a somber reality. It suddenly seemed oddly appealing to consider dying in order to keep him around.
"I...I love you, brother," you admitted, the words feeling foreign yet so right. It was something you should have said a long time ago, after your parents' deaths, when it was just the two of you against the world. But you had always been afraid—afraid that admitting your fears would make them real.
A soft smile tugged at his lips as he nodded, an unspoken understanding passing between you two. "I love you too, sis," he signed before stepping out into the afternoon, leaving you in the silence of the empty apartment.
While life in the apartment carried on around you—the stove still burning, the TV blaring the evening news, Gunpowder curling around your ankles, licking your calves—you felt tears springing up in your eyes as your thoughts raced.
Come home, Honda. Come home and tell me everything about your day, from the way the sun glinted off the skyscrapers to the way the coffee tasted at your favorite café. Come home and argue with me again, about trivial things like who left the lights on or whose turn it was to do the dishes. Slam your bedroom door like you used to when we were teenagers and stomp around the house in Dad's old boots.
Come home and laugh with me, share those terrible inside jokes that only we understand. Handle your knife in the wrong way, the way you used to when you're not on a mission, when you're just my brother and not a covert operative.
Come home and hold me again while I cry in your lap about the girls and boys that shattered my heart. Come home to fix the TV you always mess up with those greasy fingers of yours, leaving stains on the remote.
Scream at me if you need to; let out all that pent-up frustration that I know you keep bottled up inside.
Come home and tell me how you always manage to burn the pasta, making it stick to the pots. Come home and let me nag about your messiness, about the dirty socks you always leave on the floor and about the dishes in the sink.
But most importantly:
“Come home safe. Come home to me, Honda. Please."
2 months later
Late afternoon light filtered through the window, casting elongated, capering shadows across the glossy surface of your living room's hardwood floor.
Finally, after a whole day cleaning the place and trying to make it more child friendly, you were curled up in the embrace of the vintage couch and a soft, threadbare blanket, a relic from your childhood, was wrapped snugly around you, providing a comforting barrier against the creeping chill.
You idly stroked Gunpowder, who was as much a part of the family as any human member. Her fur was coarse, yet soothing under your fingertips.
Gunpowder was the only other living being that missed Honda as much as you did; her amber eyes held a profound sadness that echoed your own. You were grateful that Jin-Man let you take her from the animal shelter.
She didn't deserve to be alone, not when she had already lost so much.
With the monochrome scenes flickering against the brick wall, the contemporary television set in the room's corner was showing Casablanca.
Nonetheless, your mind was elsewhere, lost in a world of thought, meandering through a labyrinth of candid memories as your eyes were glued to the window, drinking in the expanse of the verdant family farm outside.
In your hands was your favorite cat mug, the one with the chipped ear and faded paint, a sentimental relic from your college days.
It was unusually quiet, the usual cacophony of farm life replaced by the relentless drumming of rain.
Not only was Ji-An nowhere to be seen, but Jin-Man's rusty truck had vanished from its customary location beside the red barn.
A glance at the old, ticking clock hanging on the wall—16:00, way past the time Ji-An usually got home from school—made your anxiety spike.
Just as you were about to pull on your trusty yellow raincoat to go look for her, you saw Jin-Man's truck pulling up the gravel driveway. He got out of the truck, his jacket hanging haphazardly off his broad shoulders, and his jaw clenched in a way that set off alarm bells in your head.
You quickly signed , "Hey! Old man! Good afternoon to you too! Where's Ji-An?" as he stomped past you, heading straight to his office. But he didn't answer; he didn't even spare you a glance.
Following him, you tried to make sense of what was happening, but he closed the office door right in your face. You were left standing there, frustration bubbling up inside you, a sense of foreboding making your heart pound in your chest.
As you paced around the living room, worry gnawing at you, the front door creaked open. Your heart leapt at the sound, and you turned around, expecting to see Ji-An, safe and sound.
But what you saw made your heart drop.
Ji-An walked in, soaked to the bone and covered in mud, carrying her pink backpack—the one her mother had bought for her last Christmas. Her uniform was clinging to her small frame, her hair plastered to her forehead, but she didn't make a sound. Not a sob, not a whimper.
Seeing her, you rushed over, dropping onto your knees to be at her level. "Ji-An, sweetheart, what happened? Why didn't you come home with Uncle Jin-Man?" you asked. A flutter of panic seized you as she remained silent, her eyes downcast. "Did something happen at school? You can tell me. I'm here for you."
“I need a bath, Noona. I don't want to talk about it right now. Is that okay?”
You looked at her for a long moment, the sight of her shivering form causing a lump to form in your throat. Her hair, previously neatly braided, was now a mess; the ties you had made for her earlier that morning were nowhere to be found.
"Yeah… Of course, baby," you reassured her, offering a weak smile.
With a sigh, you slowly rose to your feet and gently took her hand, leading her to the bedroom. You could feel her fingers tremble slightly in your grasp, her small hand cold and damp from the rain.
You then went to the bathroom to prepare a warm bath for her. You quickly grabbed a fresh set of clothes for her—a soft purple cotton t-shirt and a pair of comfortable cartoon pants that had cute little teddy bears printed on them. You placed them neatly on the bathroom counter, within her reach.
Once the bathtub was filled with warm water and a generous amount of bubble bath, you helped her undress the wet clothes sticking to her skin.
While Ji-An enjoyed her warm bath, Gunpowder sat in front of the bathtub. Her amber eyes were focused on the bubbles, her tail twitching with curiosity. Every now and then, she would bat at a stray bubble, her paw slicing through the air with a fluid motion as if it were a game.
With Ji-An safely in the bath and the clothes inside the washing machine, you then went to the kitchen to begin preparing dinner. Using cookie cutters, you shaped the food into fun shapes—a star-shaped sandwich, fruit cut into the shape of animals, a bowl of soup with alphabet pasta. You even managed to make a small salad; the vegetables were bright and colorful. It was a small gesture, but you hoped it would bring a smile to Ji-An's face.
Throughout the days you've been living in this place, you've tried countless times to make Jin-Man and Ji-An eat at the same place, to share a meal like a family. But Jin-Man always avoided you and Ji-An like you were viruses, always eating small things before burying himself on the couch while watching movies all alone or in his office working with Pasin. It was frustrating to see the distance between them, but then again, it wasn't your job to force conversations and lovey dovey moments.
Once the food was ready, you set the table and then sat down in front of Ji-An, waiting for her to finish her bath. She emerged a while later, her hair damp and her cheeks flushed from the warm water.
Gunpowder, having finished her bubble play, twined around Ji-An’s legs as the child sat at the table. You both sat in silence for a while, the only sound being the gentle hum of the washing machine and the occasional clink of cutlery against plates.
Then, to your surprise, Ji-An was the one to break the silence.
"Today, I waited for Uncle Jin-Man to come and pick me up from school. But he was late, and it started to rain. I decided to walk home instead."
You watched as she continued to sign, her hands moving with a quiet determination. " I was walking in the rain when I saw Uncle Jin-Man's truck. He slowed down, but I didn't want to get in. I was upset with him. So, I continued to walk, even though it was raining hard. Uncle Jin-Man stopped and waited for me to get in, but I didn't."
“I wanted him to come out and apologize, to tell me he was sorry for being late. But he just accelerated and went away. I was so angry, Noona. I wanted him to understand how I felt and how it felt to be forgotten."
"It's okay, baby. It's okay to feel upset. But remember, your uncle loves you very much. Sometimes, adults make mistakes too."
Shortly after dinner, you decided it was time for Ji-An to learn a new task: cleaning the dishes.
Filling the sink with warm, sudsy water, you showed her how to hold the scrub brush and guided her hand to clean the surface of the plates with gentle but firm strokes. You made sure she understood the importance of removing all leftover bits of food and how to rinse each dish thoroughly under the running water.
"Remember, Ji-An, cleaning is also a part of cooking. Once you're done eating, always make sure to clean up after yourself. It's not just about keeping your area clean, but also about respecting the people who will use the kitchen after you. See, we're not just cleaning up our mess; we're also preparing a clean space for the next person, " you signed, watching as she absorbed your words and continued washing the plates carefully under your watchful eye.
When you were done and completed with the task, you noticed that the sky had completely darkened, the bright hues of the day replaced by the deep blues and blacks of night. You gently dried Ji-An's small, pruney hands with a plush, soft towel and led her towards her bedroom. The room was bathed in the warm, cozy hue from the night lamp sitting on her bedside table, casting playful shadows that danced on the walls.
You tucked her into her bed. The fluffy comforter was pulled up to her chin, and you couldn't help but laugh at the way Gunpowder jumped onto her lap, purring contently.
"Noona," she signed, her eyes wide and luminous in the dim light, reflecting the soft glow of the night lamp. "Can you tell me a bedtime story? "
"Of course, sweetheart. Do you have any particular story in mind?" You asked, settling yourself comfortably at the edge of her bed, your hand gently rubbing soothing circles on her back.
"No, you choose, " she shrugged, her small body snuggling deeper into the warm covers.
You mulled over her request for a moment, your mind flipping through the pages of the countless stories you knew. Finally, one came to your mind. "There's a sad yet beautiful story from my hometown about two squirrels. They were mates—lovers for life and the town's favorite pair of animals. They were seen everywhere together, always chattering away in their own language, their tails intertwined. "
With each word, you painted a vivid picture of their life together. You told her about the female squirrel's illness and the male's devotion and his refusal to leave her side even in search of food.
As you narrated, you noticed Ji-An's eyes welling up with a faraway look. She interrupted you multiple times. "Why didn't the male squirrel eat?" "Why didn't he find another mate? " "Do all squirrels do this? "
You answered each question patiently, explaining the depth of the squirrel's love and the depth of his grief. You told her about how the male squirrel mourned for his mate, returning to their empty nest alone each year.
As you reached the end of the story, you noticed Ji-An's eyes growing heavy. Her questions became fewer and farther between, her chest moving slower until she slept. Still, she was twitching ever so slightly, hands closed and then jerking open in a rhythmic pattern that spoke volumes.
In an attempt to provide some comfort, you laid down next to her, being careful not to jostle her too much. You wrapped your arm around her small form, pulling her closer to your warmth.
Out of the corner of your eye, you saw a flash of yellow and red. The hyena. It was lurking in the corner of the room, its eyes gleaming malevolently in the dim light, eager to haunt you too. You didn't even turn to look at it. It was there, but it wasn't real. You knew it.
"Goodnight, Ji-An," you murmured softly, pressing a gentle kiss on her forehead, placing her bunny toy in the place where you'd been seconds before. "Sleep tight, sweetheart," you added, stroking her hair soothingly. "Noona's here. You're safe."
You switched off the night lamp, plunging the room into darkness, save for the faint moonlight filtering through the window.
As you left her room, you closed the door gently behind you, leaving the hyena and the remnants of your past locked away.
Easing back into the worn porch chair, the fabric of Jin-Man's purloined shirt fluttered against your skin in the cool night breeze. A stolen moment of solitude, with nothing but a half-burnt cigarette for company.
The embers at the tip flickered, casting an eerie glow in the darkness. Drawing the cigarette to your lips, you inhaled, letting the sharp tang of nicotine coil around your senses and momentarily dull your worries.
Eyes shut, you allowed your thoughts to drift to the intricate web of coding and changes you had to make in Murthehelp.
The only sounds were the distant hum of crickets and the soft rustling of leaves under the night sky's vast expanse. Yet, this tranquility was abruptly shattered by the encroaching sound of hushed footsteps gradually growing louder. Your eyes fluttered open to see Jin-Man standing before you, arms crossed over his chest, eyes fixed on the cigarette nestled between your fingers with a look of distaste as if you had the devil's hands between your lips.
A chuckle escaped you; the sight of Jin-Man, usually so composed, visibly irked by the cigarette, was enough to momentarily diffuse the tension. "Insomnia again?" you asked, flicking the ash off the cigarette with your thumb.
His hardened gaze didn't waver as he retorted, "I was waiting for you to come to bed."
You shrugged nonchalantly. Since your suicide attempt, Jin-Man has taken it upon himself to keep a watchful eye on you. The concept of solitary sleep had become foreign to both of you.
“What's eating at you?" he asked, his gaze softening slightly.
"Why did you abandon Ji-An at school?"
"I got tied up and lost track of time," he replied, but his excuse fell on deaf ears. You scoffed at his words, well aware of the truth. He hadn't forgotten; he probably thought leaving Ji-An to trek home on her own would toughen her up.
"That's a load of crap, and you know it," you retorted, stomping out the cigarette under your feet. "Do you think making her walk home alone in the rain is going to make her stronger? Is that your grand plan?"
His silence was a response in itself, resonating in the quiet night air louder than any words.
"You are unbelievable, Jin-Man," you muttered. The scent of fresh paint and pine filled the air. It was a far cry from the gunpowder and blood that once filled your memory. But you couldn't help but crave it sometimes, even if it meant pain. Pain meant life; it meant survival. "You keep pushing her away relentlessly, like a stubborn child refusing his vegetables. You're so preoccupied with making her tough and resilient that you forget she's just a child. She needs your love and your understanding. You forget that she can't even communicate normally and that her aphasia is only getting worse! You don't even let me talk with her teacher, and don't pretend I don't know about the bullying she's enduring at school! We're not in Babylon , Jin-Man! We're in a small town where everyone knows everyone else. For heaven's sake, grow up!”
He retorted, his voice sharp as a blade, slicing through the heavy silence. “You should be more concerned with managing your own aphasia and PTSD. Ji-An’s not your responsibility. She's not related to you by blood. Drop this saintly act of playing mom. We're not her parents. This isn't a dollhouse and we're not Ken and Barbie.”
"Act? I kept Ji-An alive after her parents died! I trained her to communicate again! And even though it's hard, I've made her eat properly and taught her how to brush her teeth and do her homework again! I've been here for her every step of the way! You just... sit in your office or hide in your room!"
His jaw clenched tightly before he spoke again. "You think that's all it takes? Just feeding her and teaching her sign language?" He spat out angrily. The tip of his tongue traced his bottom lip as he continued speaking harshly, "It's not enough! She needs discipline! She needs structure!"
You shook your head violently. "She has enough structure! She needs us, Jin-Man! She needs our support, our guidance. She doesn't need a soldier; she needs a parent!"
His face tightened, his eyes narrowing into dangerous slits.
"Are you that afraid to care for someone, that afraid to love again? Are you hiding behind your uniform, your duties because you're too scared to face your own feelings?"
"Don't play with fire. You don't know what you're talking about."
"I think I do! And do you think Jin-Suk would like to see his daughter being trained as a warrior rather than growing up as a normal girl?" you challenged, your voice echoing with the strength of your belief.
The mention of his brother struck a nerve. A flash of anger crossed his stony features, and before you knew it, he was charging at you like a wild animal.
Suddenly, Jin-Man's hands shot out, pushing you roughly against the wall. Your back slammed into the gnarled wooden planks, the splintered texture scratching against your skin. The impact sent a sharp jolt of pain through your spine, causing you to gasp as the wind was knocked out of your lungs.
"Why are you doing this, Jin-Man?"
In response, his large, calloused hands wrapped around your throat in a vice-like grip, cutting off your airway. His fingers pressed against the delicate skin of your neck, the strength in his hands threatening to crush your windpipe. It felt like you were sinking into an abyss, the darkness of his rage engulfing you, making it impossible to breathe.
You clawed at his hands, desperate to pry them off. But his grip was unyielding; his hands felt like iron bands around your neck, tightening with every second that passed. As you gasped for breath, your vision started to spin, the edges blurring as black spots danced in front of your eyes. Your lungs felt like they were on fire, screaming for air.
Panic surged within you, a tidal wave that threatened to consume you. Time seemed to stretch, each second feeling like an eternity as you struggled to draw breath.
Finally, his grip loosened just slightly, allowing a sliver of oxygen to rush into your lungs. You gasped; the taste of air was like ambrosia—sweet and life-giving. Coughs racked your body as you struggled to regain control over your breathing, your throat raw and your chest heaving. The salty tang of tears prickled at the corners of your eyes, blurring your vision.
But you refused to back down, to give in to the fear. You locked eyes with him, defiance burning in your gaze. "Go ahead, Jin-Man, continue," you spat out, your voice raspy from the assault. "Kill me. But know this: my death won't change the truth.”
“Jesus, you're so weak, girl.”
A chuckle found its way through your bruised vocal chords. “Yeah? Wanna see who's weak then?”
Summoning every iota of your willpower, you retaliated against his suffocating hold. Your fingers clawed at his wrist, nails digging into his skin as you strained against his formidable strength.
After a fierce and desperate struggle, your adrenaline-fueled power seemed to catch him off guard. With a sudden explosive kick, you managed to wrench yourself free, pushing him violently away from you.
Caught off balance, Jin-Man stumbled backwards. His feet skidded across the wooden floorboards, and his body crashed into the pot of vibrant lilies you had carefully chosen from the local market to adorn the porch. The pot shattered on impact, fragments of terracotta scattering across the floor, intermingling with the uprooted flowers and loose soil.
For a moment, the world seemed to hold its breath. The only sounds were the soft rustling of the brutalized lilies and the quiet patter of dirt falling onto the floor. But inside? Inside of you, the hyenas laughter echoed through your mind, mocking you for getting what you deserved—too used to chaos and violence.
The sight of the destruction seemed to snap Jin-Man out of his rage-induced stupor, his furious gaze softening as he took in the aftermath of your altercation.
"I'm done," you said, breaking the silence. "I'm done with this, Jin-Man. I'm done with your anger, your stubbornness, and your refusal to let anyone in. I'm done with the constant battles, the endless wars. I'm grabbing my stuff and leaving."
“Y/N…” He trailed off as he grabbed your arm roughly, pulling you around to face him. Your bodies were just inches apart now, his breath hot on your cheek as he pleaded silently.
“Don’t. Just shut your mouth and let me go. I'm not your Barbie, right?” Each word was punctuated by the bitter taste of blood as you absentmindedly touched your raw throat.
“You can't sleep alone.”
“I'll manage.”
“You can't remember when you last ate.”
"I'll set a reminder.”
"You can't drive without crying."
"I'll get a taxi."
"Ji-An needs you."
I need you.
"She needs you more."
"And you, Jin-Man," you added, the sting of your words sobering the air. "You need to realize that before it's too late."
----------------
April 3:
"Are you serious? Did I actually have to buy another chip to send you messages? You know, the store owner looked at me like I was crazy."
1 missed call from Ahjusshi
April 5:
"Ji-An keeps asking for you. She asked me to tell her the story about the couple of squirrels. You know, the one about their endless love and devotion."
2 missed calls from Jeong
April 7:
"Pasin showed me the link to the site. It's pretty quick and easy to access. Even an old man like me can make requests for guns, right? Technology these days, eh?"
April 11:
"She asked me to put on Casablanca. It's one of your favorites, right? I remember Honda telling me that you're addicted to Hollywood classics.”
“Gunpowder keeps sleeping on your side of the bed. I hate it.”
3 missed calls from Jeong Jin-Man, son of a bitch
April 22:
"I have a mission for you. It's critical and requires your skills."
"Can you come home so that we can discuss the details? There's something about it I can't trust in a message."
8 missed calls from the son of a bitch
“I guess I will ask So Min-Hye to replace you then. I know you wouldn't want that."
May 7:
“Ji-An's teacher told me that you visited her today. Did you really make two boys eat dirt by grabbing her money?”
“I could've helped.”
May 9:
“Went to the market today and heard Kyung Soo say that you're a good kisser. I had to stop myself from laughing."
“I heard from the locals that he went to the hospital after being knocked out. Strange, right? Or should I say, expected?"
May 16:
"Gunpowder brought a dead bird into the house. I think she's trying to replace you as the hunter of the family."
May 21:
"I saw a girl at the market wearing a dress you would like. It had sunflowers all over it. Made me think of you."
"She was about your age, too. For a moment, I thought it was you ."
-------
As Jin-Man speeds in the direction of Ji-An's school, his heart pounds against his ribs like a war drum. His knuckles turn white as he tightens his grip on the steering wheel, his forehead slick with beads of sweat. He curses himself silently, berating his own negligence.
How could he have not noticed that Ji-An hadn't come home?
The typical view of the small city blurs past him, the houses and trees merging into a hasty collage of colors under the evening gloom. The town's bakery, the park where the children play, and the old library all blur into indistinguishable shadows. But he barely registers any of it. His mind is filled with vivid images of you screaming at him for this oversight.
He imagines your small fists beating at his chest, your eyes—those captivating eyes that he secretly admired—flaring with anger and worry.
“How could you forget her again , Jin-Man? She's just a child!"
The guilt, like a ravenous beast, gnaws at him, driving him to press the pedal harder. The old engine protests, its roar echoing through the tranquil evening.
Suddenly, he remembers his phone.
Snatching it from the passenger seat, he dials your number hastily. The line rings once, twice, thrice, but there's no answer. He fumbles to leave a voicemail, his voice shaking slightly as he speaks into the device. "Hey, I… messed up. Ji-An... I… Just call me back.”
The voicemail ends with a beep, leaving Jin-Man alone with his thoughts and the eerie silence of the empty road. He tosses the phone onto the passenger seat, his eyes never leaving the road.
Nearing the school, his eyes flicked to the digital clock on the dashboard—it read 19:00, the hour when the last echoes of childhood laughter usually fade away. But now, the school grounds were eerily silent and deserted, a stark contrast to the daytime symphony of playful shouts and laughter. The playground, usually a vibrant hub of activity, was painted with somber shades, the swings swaying lightly in the breeze, their squeaky chains the only sound piercing the silence.
As he swung into the school's parking lot, a small figure suddenly sprang from the shadows, frantically waving his arms.
A boy was shouting, his voice hoarse and strained, as he pointed towards the grimy basement door at the rear of the school building. "She's locked there!"
Without a second thought, Jin-Man abandons his car, leaving the engine running as he sprints towards the basement door. The door is locked, but within, he can hear Ji-An's voice, her pleas echoing through the desolate night.
"Jeong Jin-Man! Jeong Jin-Man! Jeong Jin-Man!" she is calling, her voice scratchy and strained, likely from the first use of her vocal cords in months.
Frantically, he scans his surroundings. His eyes land on a fire safety box nearby. Inside, he spots a hammer.
With no time to spare, he smashes the box, glass shards raining onto the worn-out asphalt. He grabs the hammer, using it to break the rusted chains and unlock the door.
In a final heave, he throws the door open, revealing Ji-An inside. Her cheeks were flushed red from crying and her eyes were brimming with a mix of relief and fear.
She doesn't waste any time rushing at him, her small fists pounding against his chest. He doesn't move; he doesn't try to stop her. She's screaming at him, her words punctuated by her furious hits: "Why did you take so long? You promised you were coming back soon! Why did you arrive so late? Why did you let her go? Why did you let Noona go? Why? Why?"
He could only look at her, absorbing her words and feeling each syllable like a physical blow. Her pain, her anger, and her confusion were all directed at him.
Then he did the only thing he could think of—the only thing he thought you would have done in this situation.
He pulled her into a tight, protective hug.
For minutes, he doesn't say a word until he grabs her, holding her close.
Turning to the boy, he nods, "I'll give you a ride home."
The journey to the kid’s home was silent, save for the muted hum of the car's engine and the occasional rustle of cloth against leather.
Ji-An was huddled against the passenger seat, her body trembling slightly. Noticing this, he pulled off his jacket, wrapping it around her small frame in the same way he did for you.
After dropping the boy off and Ji-An finally falling asleep, he drives aimlessly. The city lights flicker past in a hazy blur, their glow casting fleeting shadows on his face. He thinks of you—your laughter, your anger, and your determination. It's strange, he thinks, how the absence of someone can fill a room, a house, or a life.
His thoughts are interrupted by the sudden ringing of his phone.
Glancing at the screen, he sees your name flashing. He hesitates, his thumb hovering over the decline button.
But then he remembers how things used to be and how it felt to hear your voice without the weight of regret and guilt. He misses when your name didn't make his chest ache, when it was just a name he heard now and then but held no significance to him.
He yearns for the days when he didn't know you, when his eyes didn't instinctively scan every room he entered in hopes of finding you there. He misses the sight of you standing among strangers, wearing that ridiculous skirt he used to tease you about but now finds himself missing.
He finds himself longing for the mundane details. How you'd take off your shoes at the front door, placing your keys with care in the small glass bowl on the corner of the kitchen counter. How you'd drape your coat over the back of a dining room chair, your socks left at the foot of the bed next to the sleeping cat.
He misses holding back your hair as you succumb to the side effects of your PTSD pills, your body rejecting the chemicals meant to help you cope. He yearns for the times when you would climb under the white blankets with him, forcefully opening his arms to encase you between them.
He misses how you would place your legs on top of his and let your hands wander to his waist and chest. He misses hearing you say, "I missed you," telling him about your day as you would slowly drift off to sleep. And he longs for the times he would secretly kiss your cheek softly before he inevitably had to leave you for work.
He misses when you were simply strangers—not two people who act like strangers in public but once knew each other better than they ever knew themselves. He misses the simplicity of those days and the innocence of not knowing what it felt like to lose you.
Because, in the end, when the lights are off and his eyes flutter shut, the back of his mind always whispers your name, calling out to you like you are the only place he was ever meant to call home .
When he finally decided to answer the call, he placed the phone on the dashboard, the worn leather creaking under the weight. He switched to speaker mode, the familiar chime filling the small space of the car.
"Hello?"
Tinny and distant over the phone speaker, you responded almost immediately. "You left a voicemail. What happened?" In the background, he could hear the faint, unmistakable sound of a lighter flicking open and the soft hiss of a cigarette being lit.
"Your voice sounds rough," he commented, trying to lighten the heavy atmosphere with a touch of humor. "How many days have you been communicating only with sign language?"
"Shut up, motherfucker. What about Ji-An?”
"I…" he started, faltering. The words he needed to say were stuck in his throat, like a bitter pill he couldn't swallow.
“Look, Ji-Man. I have nothing to do with you anymore. I’m calling you back because you sounded like a wounded little bitch and you said her name. Drop the show and spit it out.”
“I failed again, okay?" The confession spilled out of him, the words tasting like defeat. But he couldn't stop there; he had to finish what he started. "But, look, Ji-An spoke.”
He could almost hear your sharp intake of breath and the sound of the cigarette being hastily put out in the background. There was a long, drawn-out silence, the kind of silence that spoke volumes. He could imagine your surprise—the way your eyes would widen slightly, the lit cigarette forgotten in your hand. But when you finally spoke, your voice was quiet, filled with a strange mix of relief and trepidation.
"She spoke?"
"Yes. She called out to me. She used her voice, and she spoke."
"Look, I'm not going to pretend that everything is okay between us," he continued, his voice gruff, "But I'm also not going to pretend that we don't have a shared past. One that involves a little girl who misses you."
"You're such a bastard. You know how to manipulate me using her," you snapped, the sound of a chair creaking in the background signaling your agitation.
"Maybe, but it doesn't change the fact that Ji-An misses you. And you miss her too, don't you?"
A silence followed his words—not an uncomfortable one, but a silence filled with unspoken words and a shared history. And then you sighed, a deep, heavy sigh that echoed with the weight of your unspoken thoughts.
"I do miss her. But you, Jeong Jin-Man, are a pain in my ass.”
He couldn't help but chuckle at your words. "I've been told that before."
"I'm sure you have."
Another silence filled the line, comfortable yet heavy with years of shared experiences.
"By the way," he added, his voice softer now, "the key is still under the cat statue you put by the front door. You can drop by anytime."
"I'll think about it. But don't expect me to come running back, Jin-Man. We're not the same people we used to be."
"I know. But we're still us, aren't we?"
"We're something ," you admitted, a sigh slipping past your lips. "But I don't know what that is anymore."
"Neither do I. But maybe we can figure it out together, old lady."
"Old lady?" you scoffed, a hint of amusement in your voice. "Coming from a man who's 10 years older than me."
"Years are still years," he teased, a smile playing on his lips. "But whatever we are, Y/N, whatever we become, you're still… something to me. And so is Ji-An. Remember that."
Warning!: Blood, mention of death, detail of wounds and injuries, violence, mention of weapons.
Do not read if you are under 15 years old, if you read it is under your own responsibility. Do not republish/modify my work without my permission, ask me, it costs you nothing.
The sound of the shots resounded all over the place, the darkness chasing your steps tired but without stopping.
Your trembling hands grabbing the heavy weapon, the hesitant gaze on every corner caused a new cloud of fear, but it was your job, a job that was getting along badly, not because of you, but because of the troops who did not do their job well and now you were alone in this.
"Y/N?"
The voice behind you made you jump, quickly pointing at the man behind you. Your vision dazzling your beloved with his hands up to lower your weapon from his chest.
“Fuc-“ the man covered your mouth with his gloved hand.
“Are you okay?” he asked, approaching without first looking at the sides and moving towards you in quick steps, hiding them behind a concrete wall. “I told you not to move from where you were, now look...”
“Everyone is dead,” you said looking at him and looking behind him while the man checked your wounds very closely.
“I know, let the two team move forward,” You gasped with pain when he raised your chin to see your injured eye, the hemotoma forming around while the blood dries made it look worse than it is. “You should have waited for me.”
“I was doing it but they started attacking, I couldn’t stay,” she remained silent, his eyes traveled to yours gently. “Where were you?”
“Close,” was all he said before letting go and taking a step back to check the backpack he brought with him. “Can you heal yourself?”
You nodded, making the decision to sit on the floor, pulling your gun to the side to make way for the medicine cabinet, you opened the small box. Grabbing everything you would need to be able to heal your wounds. You had several cuts on your face and a blow to the eye, your entire abdominal part was painful because of the number of blows you received, however; the worst part was taken by your right arm, the knife they had given you was so deep that you could even see the flesh sprout, making you want to be in bed for a long time.
“I’ll go back, I’ll ask for help,” you wanted to see him quickly in the face of his words.
“I’m going with you, you won’t leave me here like that”
“That’s why I’ll leave you here, you’ll be fine,” the man turned around to see you seriously. “You’re already very hurt, you won’t be able to advance so much with your arm like this, you’re losing blood. It won’t take long”
The man turned around starting to walk, you tied the gaude well on your arm to stop the bleeding, you took your weapon quickly and tried to get up with all your strength until you got it, walking behind him with regret.
“Don’t leave me here, Jinman!” the man, upon hearing his name, turned around once again until you collided with him. “Don’t leave me alone again.”
The man sighed knowing how stubborn you were, taking your healthy arm and then going down to your hand entangling his fingers in a loving but tight grip.
“You’ll never listen to me, will you?” You just looked at it. “Let’s go before they realize that we are still here, we will return to the warehouse and I will help you with those wounds, can you put up with a little more?”
hiiiii & welcome to my melanatedeuph0ria!! for ab a yr or 2 now, i’ve been mainly reading fics on tumblr on characters like rick grimes, spencer reid, toji, etc. (nonblk characters mostly let’s be fr..) and throughout those yrs, i’ve been noticing a complete lack of..
BLACK POVS.
“well, if the fic just says ‘reader x (character)’, couldn’t you just use your imagination to insert ur race?? 🤔”
while this IS true, i feel like us as black & poc readers should have the opportunity to read some fanfics that makes us feel SPECIAL & RECOGNIZED, in aspects such as our skin, hair, & realness without it being stereotypical or just having us feel defaulted to a white pov. (also without it being just SMUT cmon y’all)
also, we all know rick grimes luvs some MELANINNNN ‼️🗣️
so, with that being said, i am here to bring justice to my fellow blk readers who needed a lil spice in their reading, so the imagination part could be a bit easier 🫶🏽
SOME of the fics i make will be poc x reader, others will be just x reader & up for interpretation !!
NOTE: this is NOT me saying black readers ONLY want black-centered fics, nor is this me placing black readers in a box, NOR is this me putting down “x reader” fics!! this is me saying that, although i do enjoy fics without a specified race most of the time, sometimes i feel like having fics catered to poc are special as well because there aren’t many on this app to call our own!!💗
ty for sticking around until the end, and im hoping to start writing fics soon !! 🌷🌸
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Most people are reblogging an ask I answered long ago about offerings to give to the dead. It’s long overdue, but I’ve finally typed it up into an actual cohesive post.
~ Herbs ~
Lavender, for peace in passing on
Thyme, to give peace to those who have died from violence
Apple, a common Irish symbol for the dead, which I often give to my ancestors
Pomegranates, myth of Persephone and all that
Rosemary, for remembrance
Myrrh, commonly used in necromancy, also used to give off good vibes
Chervil, often used in rituals for the dead
Mugwort, usually used to aid divination and communication with the dead. I also give it as an offering
Bay, same as mugwort (my mentality is that these herbs will help “send” the offerings to the dead)
Lemonbalm, for peace and healing
Wormwood, to strengthen the communication with the dead, as well as healing and revenge
Frankincense, a traditional herb (usually incense) to honor the dead
~ Flowers ~
Calendula, for blessings and eternal love
Rose petals (or the flower) for love and healing
Marigolds, perfect for ancestor worship (as well as spirit work salves and tea)
Lilies, for a sense of security and togetherness; ideal for children
Orchids, for balanced emotions and adoration; ideal for former lovers
Daisies, also ideal for former lovers and lost family members
Tulips, to spread happiness
Dandelions, ideal for connecting with certain spirits (especially when drunk as a tea)
~ Liquids ~
Water, a traditional offering for the dead, often left out for passing spirits
Wine or other alcohol
Juice, namely pomegranate or beet
Oils, such as olive oil, pomegranate oil, coconut, almond, vinegar
~ Other ~
Stones or crystals
Coins
Tobacco (I also know some people who use cigarette smoke or ashes)
Grains, traditionally brown bread
Meat
Candles, namely dark colored or earth-toned
Cleaning up graveyards, placing offerings on graves and speaking to them also makes a great offering
Song and music
Anything personal to the person you’re sending the offering to
~ What to do with the Offerings ~
Burn herbs or flowers (safely) with a written message to “send” the offering to the soul
Leave coins, flowers or herbs on the grave
Pour liquid into the earth, or leave them out in a bowl
Leave offerings out as a “standing offering” for the dead who pass through (idea from @arachnospooky)
This is SO overdue I’m so sorry but I hope it helps!!
The Empress' Palace @mazuru7 - Tumblr Blog | Tumlook