Izzy

a/n: this ask will literally send luke into a coma

—

“ thanks for being my servant last night “

“ anytime! 💋 “

those singular, out of context posts on x, had sent the internet into complete chaos. finn never posted on social media, so that small little sentence after the snl hosting, after a completely inactive account, had turned into that month’s hot gossip. the whisperings and talks about your relationship was not new to anyone. you had grown up together and were obviously the closest of anyone in the cast. you hadn’t been private about sharing hotel rooms, staying at each other’s place when the other was in town— the gossip was never lacking. every public appearance led to speculation and edits and arguments and a few tears. and you loved it. finn would look look at you with amused exasperation as you showed him edits or a particularly worked up fan post. you had been private about your six year relationship, or the fact that you were now living together. it was the not so innocent comments that were always pulled off as playful, the way finn always pulled you slightly closer on red carpets or public events, how your eyes always found each other in interviews, and how his entire face lit up when you were brought up, the few times you weren’t with him.

hosting snl was more nerve wracking than you had anticipated. finn always thought you were hilarious, but that was one of his boyfriend guidelines— he had to think you were funny, even if you weren’t; it was one of the exchanges for sleeping with you.

the running joke for the episode had been agreed to without hesitation, always loving toying with the fans and hanging the obvious right in their faces. every sketch, no matter the context or inappropriate timing, the two of you had to kiss— fully hot and heavy. it wouldn’t be explained, it wouldn’t be acknowledged, but it would be painfully obvious and uncomfortable. for everyone else….

finn had just smirked at you, entirely too into the idea and already getting ideas. the catch was neither of you knew when it would be— or how inappropriately timed. they wanted you to get each other to break character. they wanted it to be as uncomfortable as possible. unfortunately, you didn’t embarrass easily, and your poor boyfriend got entirely too worked up entirely too easily…

you would spend an hour on sunday, scrolling through comments and fan reactions, finn stretched out with his head in your lap, now understanding the great amusement you got from watching it all unfold.

“ GENUINELY WHAT THE FUCK WERE THESE TWO ON LAST NIGHT!? ” attached pictures and screenshots showed various smirks, a few incriminating positions, and finn very red in the face but holding it together surprisingly well. lots of ship names in all caps, lots of screaming, more tags than you had ever seen in a day. celebrity news headlines of your most guilty looking scenes and more screenshots.

god, this was almost more fun than acting…

“ i just want to know wtf they were told before filming bc she did NOT hold back “

↳ girl’s probably been waiting for this for years

↳ genuinely look at finn’s face and tell me that man is not EXACTLY where he wants to be

↳ do yall think they even made it home…

↳ weird af they are ACTORS

the first sketch was as if you were simply in an interview. you had a rough outline from the script, but no one really knew how much you had plotted as soon as you were told anything, that doesn’t need to be sensored. you sat down beside finn, treating it as if it were a regular interview and not the most famous and long running sketch comedy show that had given you permission to be as unhinged as you felt comfortable.

“it’s so good to have you both here today!” the jimmy fallon wig and set was really selling it. this is exactly how you would act if it was deemed appropriate. “thanks, jimmy, it’s great to be back.” finn glanced over at you, as you slowly inched closer, eyeing him with an innocent, sultry expression. you watched his jaw tense just for a second, before turning back to jimmy.

“i hear a lot of talk…” not jimmy pressed his lips tightly together as you scooted even closer, putting one leg over finn’s lap. finn, with all that was in him, did not flinch. he just shifted his hand on top of your leg, resting it there casually, as if you did this in every interview. “—that you two are close…” you shifted again so you were fully in finn’s lap, shifting just enough to wrap an arm over his shoulder. finn’s breath caught but it was only noticeable to you, pressed up against him. finn put an arm around your waist and rested it on your hip, “we are close, yes… pretty close, i would say.”

there were snorts from the crowd and you sighed, starting to massage finn’s head and play with his hair. this is what you had always done if his anxiety was high, or if he was having trouble falling asleep. finn almost closed his eyes, immediately relaxing under your touch but not quite forgetting your surroundings.

“what do you think of the rumors—” not jimmy did stare at you, blinking slowly and trying not to smile as you leaned even closer, lips brushing against finn’s ear. there was an immediate reaction, though he played it off quite well, as if he was exasperated with you and trying not to break character.

there was a cough from your left as the tonite show card covered his laughing face, “sorry, did you say something to him?” you hummed, “oh, no… continue.”

“what do you think of the rumors and speculation that you two are more than friends?”

“oh, well, that’s ridiculous.” you shifted further, until you were completely straddling finn. there were screams and shrieks of laughter. finn eyed you like you were in trouble, “yeah, that’s crazy…” he brushed his lips against yours, pulling you in for a full tongue kiss as you tried to break away. you almost laughed against him, but instead covered it by throwing your arms around his neck and fisting his hair. a full fledged, hot and heavy, overly dramatic make out ensued, both of you breathing out a laugh every few kisses.

“oh— we’ll be right back, i think…”

you pulled away, breathless and laughing, taking a slight bow as you were applauded for your sheer audacity. finn eyed you, shaking his head just slightly, expression promising that you were in trouble.

“ i need to know what finn said here!! someone who can read lips PLEASE “

↳ FR I’VE BEEN TRYING TO FIGURE IT OUT

↳ u guys are genuinely so insane

↳ NO BC HE SAID SOMETHING AND THEN SHE SMIRKED WHY DID HE COVER THE MIC

finn had taken your shameless improvised stunt as a personal challenge to outdo you. he was giving you eyes from across the set, leaning into the flirty side he reserved for at home. he would make you break character. he would push you and make sure you suffered. the end of the world sketch ran in it’s scripted intention— the president panicking and not knowing a single protocol or being able to make a decision. you, the quiet secretary carefully talking him through his bare minimum knowledge and understanding, then getting into arguments with the military advisors— one of which was finn.

finn was now on a war path to make you break and was fully intending to win this little battle of the wills— and hormones. during a scripted heated argument, finn suddenly grabbed you and dragged you to the floor. “finn—!” you shrieked, bursting into surprised, amused laughter; you nearly screamed as you both fell to the floor. finn just smirked as the cameras scrambled to track you. laughter had exploded from the crowd; screams and shrieks echoing. finn straddled you, giving you the most smug, dangerous expression. you were breathless, completely caught off guard and staring at him like he was insane. he smirked once more and you sat up, dragging him back down. you were laughing before you could actually kiss you.

you screenshoted one particular post about your favorite sketch of the night, “ on GOD she really said if you see me handcuffed to an alien emperor’s throne, don’t save me, i’m exactly where i want to be “

↳ oh my god they are SO PATHETIC

↳ okay but yall didn’t think this was weird af

↳ if you told me they wrote this sketch themselves, i would believe you.

“well, does this work for you?” finn turned to you in the make up chair, alien empire leathers and all. you glanced at him and tilted your head, “how much would you judge me if i said yes?”

finn snorted, smirking, “only slightly.”

“at least you don’t have handcuffs and a chain.”

“that’s a shame for you…”

the cast really did not know what they were getting themselves into, asking what they had. this had been your banter since you were fourteen; though it got a lot less innocent and a lot more obvious as friendship shifted into something else. there was amused glances as they realized they were in for a good show. you narrowed your eyes, “do you have a princess leia costume?”

finn’s eyes snapped up from his phone, wide with genuine terror. “a what?” he stared at you like you misspoke. hair stopped fidgeting with your four braids, glancing over to costume, “not exact. just something similar…”

there was amused and a few slightly exasperated stares. and when you walked out of wardrobe in a leather sports bra and leather leggings, you knew you had won right then and there. his jaw fell open, eyes scanning you like he was in disbelief— like you were insane. you did feel rather insane as his eyes took you in.

“curtain in five.”

you shifted the strips of fabric around your legs, wishing you had worn something this unique and suggestive in literally any of your roles. finn was still staring at you, jaw tight.

“are you ready, highness?” you smirked as you drawled innocently. wardrobe fastened the plastic cuffs around your wrists, setting the attached plastic chain in your hand with a playful smile. you smirked down at the attire, “do you want to take me for a walk, wolfhard?”

for what it’s worth, you really did think he looked damn good up there on his stupid throne with his stupid wig and his goddamn smirk. he spun the end of your chain around in his hand, you stood behind him, massaging his shoulders. finn truly did look like he was having the time of his life. another questionable item was held out to him and he snapped his fingers, “my lady. hand feed me.” your jaw ticked and you fought back the smirk, “yes, highness.” you dropped your tone, voice coming out as sultry as you could muster. finn glanced up at you, expectantly, “today, please— or i shall replace you with another.” you almost scoffed, “sorry, highness.” you pushed the other out of the way, taking the plate in your hand and bending low. finn’s eyes sparkled as they met yours, mouth open expectantly, almost managing not to smirk.

“another treat for his majesty!”

you snatched the bowl away, eyeing it. you glanced at finn, who snapped his fingers again. you bit back a smile and cleared your throat, “this looks messy, your majesty…”

finn’s tone didn’t shift, his expression didn’t change, “all the best things are. get on with it.” you assumed it was chocolate pudding, but dipped your finger in it to make sure. you touched the faintest amount to your tongue and hummed, “i should say it’s not poisoned, your majesty.”

finn watched you with a look that was almost pathetic. oh, this night may very well never end… you flicked your tongue out and smiled innocently, draping yourself over his shoulder, “here,” you swiped your finger through the bowl, coating your finger thickly with it, “i should think it’s to your majesty’s liking.” and you stuck your finger out to finn, swiping his lip just slightly, then smearing the tiniest bit on his nose and chin. you bit your lip with a sultry, stupid smile, “apologies, majesty…” you grimaced, giving the quickest innocent side eye before scooping up even more pudding. finn’s breath caught instantly, but he didn’t flinch. he looked up at you, eyes dark and daring. you knew this was pushing it. you knew this was very likely going to get you in trouble in more ways than one. and finn, never taking his eyes off you, didn’t hesitate to put your finger right in his mouth, slowly pulling the pudding from it with an unwavering expression. the crowd had gone from snickering to screaming to whistling— a few people sounded hysterical, a few others were actually fanning themselves. you forced yourself not to move, keeping that same soft, neutral expression. as finn licked his lips, he returned his eyes straight ahead, “and it’s highness to you.”

that absolute little shit…

“ oh, so it’s porn “

↳ what an odd thing to say ??

↳ did you even watch it ?!?!?

ummm hahahah what’s the context of this…

wtf was even happening at this point

IS THIS WHAT THE TWEET WAS ABOUT DVHBSJSJSHSDJI

you glanced at the camera by the dressing room, knowing this was likely the last chance to break him. this was the sketch that was not a sketch— but was a sketch— but actually wasn’t. and that is why it was your favorite one of the night. you waited for action to be called; standing just against the closed door, finn smirking at you as he waited— impatiently and anything but professional. your hand was on his tie, his shirt partially unbuttoned and crooked, the suit he would wear for the ending bunched in your fist on his ribcage. action was called and the smile on your face was entirely too real as your back bumped against the door and you and finn giggled and hushed each other, sure your breathing was heavy and exaggerated. you held back real laughter at how much fun you were having and how ironic this all really was. your names were called in the distance, several times, each more irritated, each getting more and more laughter.

there was screaming from the crowd and you knew your surprise guests had arrived.

“dude, where are they?”

“don’t ask me, man! they ask us to show up as a surprise and then they miss final curtain!”

you nearly shook with anticipation, now both of you looking equally as excited and devilish.

ten seconds.

“did you find them?”

“no.”

you heard gaten sigh and you held your breath.

“i know where they are...”

the knock on the door came.

finn slammed you against the door, almost gasping at how hard it had unintentionally been. you bit back a snort, covering your mouth immediately. finn fought back a snort, immediately fixing his expression as the door opened. you were all over each other then. hands roaming, fist pulling at fabric, pulling on his tie until he was flush against you. finn almost sighed into the kiss, but your hands in his hair pulled him back to fake reality. the kiss would be legendary. it had been unscripted, the way it was all heat and tongue and hands. there was a cough of surprise and gaten and caleb fighting back their amusement.

finn finally broke away from you, cheeks red and breathless, smiling stupidly— in a way that you just knew wasn’t acting. “shit, sorry,” he wiped your smeared lipstick from his mouth and adjusted his clothes, “are we late?”

caleb and gaten rolled their eyes, both glaring at you in disbelief, though amusement and a flicker of pride hid behind their roles. and gaten just closed the door on the two of you, sighing as he ran a hand over his face, “every fucking day…”

“you’d think after six years, they would have a little more self control.”

final curtain really came, as you and finn walked out hand in hand, both smiling like you had gotten away with stealing the entire world. you both bowed as the rest of the cast came out, followed lastly, by caleb and gaten, who joined either side of you and finn. finn had let go of your hand, gesturing fully to you with a small bow. he returned his arms around gaten and your cheeks were starting to hurt from the smiling.

finn went on with his monologue, passing you a small flask. you fought back a smirk as you swallowed it, thankful it was just water. he leaned in then, hand over his mic, despite the cameras and lights flicking off, “do you even know how much trouble you’re in, when we get home?”

a/n: this is quite different from the usual ex bf!luke content, but i love it cause it truly shows how complex their relationship with each other really is. these two don't just run back to each other's arms for sex, but also because there is this emotionally deep and unmatched connection that only they have with each other. i hope u still enjoy it though! thank u so much for this req <33