Mavywvy

into ִ..•𓂃 ࣪ ִֶָ་ 🪽ྀི ༘࿐.•

TW- sh, ed, ana, mia, bed, sui

I wanna start of by saying despite promising myself not to relapse, I did. and that being said im pro-recovery (idk what it means but i mean it in the sense i hope people recover and i encourage recovery)

About me and my goals?…

Cw- 56kg

Lw- 47kg

Gw-45kg

Ugw- 43kg

Hight - 147cm (last i checked)

Age- early 20s

More info about me

I grew up with a bed, i was sh almost everyday. and have been on and off with ana since i was 15. and rn its ana, mia and cvt.

My safe foods are - popcorn, broth soups, pudding,eggs

My fear foods are - nuts, sugar, butter, bananas, everything on the Cheesecake Factory menu

Im not allowed to buy a food scale, sweetener or protein drinks.

Im not allowed to fast.

You might be thinking “but mavy your 20, why cant you do those things?” Im arab and muslim so i cant move out or go against my parents. Even if i have the money, they wont let me 😃.

I like anime, long hair, not so niche shows/moives, cats, not wearing a bra, my walking pad, pretending i read even tho i just listen to audiobooks.

DNI if you are- under 18, rude, mean, racists, islamaphobic, disrespectful, hatefull, zionist, an ana coach, looking for pics, toxic, the kind of person that doxxes others, in recovery.

I feel like in forgetting something…

I loved the salad dressing, my mom is very against low cal/ low fat/ low anything foods and she doesn’t know i got low fat yoghurt but it literally tastes the exact same as the full fat.

I also bought rice cakes cuz i honestly started craving the chocolate covered ones but i didnt find those at the store so i got plain rice cakes

Idk if its normal for rice cakes to be 30cals each but ill have to check the labels again.

Workouts

25 chair dips

100 squats

100 glute bridges

Thats good right?

Wrong.

I need a food scale but i know i wouldnt hear the end of it from my mom. And im not gonna use the “but i need it for baking” excuse cuz then id have to bake and eat what I baked.

Workouts

1hr 40min walk

I ate the tuna sandwiches in-front of everyone so i could go swim, then they made breakfast which was the croissant, i ate the egg inside and the veggies and thew out the croissant itself.

I purged so much by the end of the day no matter what i did i couldn’t purge more…

Oh and i ate half of the salad and cake.

Workouts

100squats

Around 5hrs of swimming

Everytime.

Good news!

I did not cry!

I did have coke zero but i wont count thatt…

Workouts

Cleaning, dusting, vacuuming, steam cleaning, re-organizing the first floor and vacuuming the second floors of the house… (if that doesn’t count as a workout to you, pretend you don’t read that. Ill count it cuz i was hitting squats and getting a good arm workout)

I hit 13,000 steps

I am trying to prepare myself mentally for the amount of food ill have to eat since the whole family is here.

I can only envision myself crying in front of my plate

I didn’t eat the whole ice cream if i did it would have been about 350cals…

Workouts

1hr walk

50squats

My parents persuaded me to go out with them and tho I insisted i didnt want dinner cuz i already had my sandwich at home, we all ended up at a restaurant and they ordered for me cuz i was in the store nearby getting candy for my brother…

Its still less than my BMR, who am i kidding its not good. All those calories wasted on oil…

Couldn’t take a picture cuz it wasn’t like a cutesy restaurant and i couldn’t go purge cuz again… it wasn’t a cutesy or neat restaurant. (Taking a pic or going to the bathroom would immediately be weird and cause suspicion)

Workouts-

1hr 40min walk

150 squats

60 glute bridges

I need workout ideas since i cant do HIT workouts…

But i cant get it.

Cuz even tho i don’t mind my thighs, my belly will be very very obvious and i don’t want that.

For a while now im worried that my brother would get eating issues

And today at a family gathering, i was sitting with my cousins and they were talking about the gym and that they are ordering from these “healthy/ low calorie” restaurants and i before this whole conversation was using the cycle thingy after my younger cousin left it and jokingly i was saying “oh id love to try that restaurant, they just don’t deliver to our area” to slide out of the convo.

After ordering sandwiches from a completely different restaurant just as the order was about to arrive they were saying “oh you know your burning alot on that” i kept saying that i didn’t feel like i was doing anything and “you might assume Im burning alot but I’m not” slipped out of my mouth.

I didn’t elaborate or explain that watches or counters don’t accurately measure how much you burn cuz i didn’t wanna ruin their gym spirit or get them down MY rabbit hole.

But Im glad i didn’t explain and I’m glad i did that exercise cuz when i got back home my brother wouldn’t give me back the walking pad

I need tea.

I wasn’t hungry but after dinner im craving more, so ill have some tea. I had half a sandwich and the tuna was the same as yesterdays.

I wish i could convince my mom to not make tuna sandwiches in bulk and to keep some aside so i can use my thin sliced bread instead of the full one but thats oki. Id rather not bring attention to my eating.

Workouts:

100squats

2hrs - 2hr 30min on this indoor cycle thing

I ended up purging most of lunch but i don’t think i purged it all so I’m still counting the cals.

For dinner i like to water down my O.G and add ice to it, so it looks like alot but its less cals. And iv been doing the one toast bread in half hack ever since i learned it. But i didn’t cut it right and some of the bread was falling off so i thew it out.

Workouts -

50min walk

150 squats

And i followed this video off youtube

I didn’t feel like eating dinner and my parents were out so I skipped it.

Workouts-

I walked while watching invincible for about 1hr40min

100 squats

I don’t count the teas cuz I didn’t add anything to them.