Fantasy Lover

random anecdote for father's day: one time during a long car ride my dad asked me, "you're familiar with Murphy's Law, right?" and i was like "isn't that the one about how anything that can go wrong will go wrong?" and he said "yeah, exactly" and i said "why do you ask?" and he went "well, have you heard of Cole's Law?" and i said "no, actually, what's that?" and he said "it's mostly lettuce and carrots with a little dressing mixed in"

Well that was gut wrenching!!

Statement of Y/N, regarding their time in servitude to the entity formerly known as One Direction. Statement begins.

wiping my cheeto dust hands on your shirt. i want to build a beautiful life with you

Hm i wonder why i feel so disconnected? *watches from afar* *watches from afar* *watches from afar* *watches from afar* *watches from afa

puts my uncomfortably wet hand on your shoulder. see here, gay boy- can i call you gay boy?

#waterboy from dispatch