Wandering Mind

I should be asleep but I’m too busy falling deeper in love with you.

You’ll meet a guy and you’ll think he’s the best person that ever existed. You’ll fall in love and be consumed by it. You’ll imagine a million different versions of your future and how your happily ever after might unfold that you forget about your own future, your own hopes and dreams that are separate from his. But, remember darling, falling in love doesn’t mean that you fall out of yourself.

I was always too much of something. I talked too much, I laughed too loudly, I did too much work, I took things too seriously, I cared too much. I could handle that. What I couldn’t handle was when I wasn’t enough. I didn’t get enough sleep, I didn’t take enough breaks, I didn’t pay enough attention to you, I didn’t love you enough. The last one is a lie, by the way. No matter what they tell you, I promise I loved you more than I ever thought I could. I think loving you was another thing I did too much. I loved you so much. The fact that I didn’t show it enough was my problem.

you look at me and i can see the next 80 years of my life in your eyes.

Fifty years from now, if you knocked on my door and told me that you needed me, I would still drop everything I had to help you. Fifty years from now, if you knocked on my door and told me you were ready to try again, I would be ready to try again. Fifty years from now, if you knocked on my door and told me that you loved me, I would love you back. I know that I will want you for the rest of my life, so I’m hoping that in fifty years from now when you knock on my door, it will only be because you misplaced the key.

I’m always soft for you, that’s the problem. You could come knocking on my door five years from now and I would open my arms wider and say ‘come here, it’s been too long, it felt like home with you.

“For people like us, a life without music is death.”