萍水相逢

I know I’m the one who cast the curse but it can still only be broken with true love. I’m begging you, somebody, please come and fall in love with these girls and make them leave, I can’t take it anymore, it sucks so bad. I can’t keep getting viciously bullied by one of the largest living species of waterfowl anymore. I’ve tried running away but they can fly so they just find me. I’m getting nothing done.

Jiang Ch*ng and Yanli are such interesting case of how kids get influenced in a broken household. One wants to break the cycle of dysfunction while another wants perpetuate it despite both of them getting hurt due to it.

Yanli grew up as the "untalented" child of prodigious Madam Yu, who saw how MARRIAGE made both her mother and father unhappy. Yet she is a woman and such she has an out in the way of marriage to get out of this house and away from her mother who constantly berates her for being "useless". She got arranged to marry Jin Zixuan, and when he showed resistance to the idea of marrying her, she did something decisive that cemented her different from her mother- SHE LET HIM GO.

She could have done what her mother did with her father. Insisting on marrying a man who doesn't like her at all. She clearly has sympathetic reasons to go through with it . Yet she let him go knowing she won't find another man worth loving again because she cannot make herself to act like her selfish mother and then blame someone else for her unhappiness. She also sees how it impacts her siblings, especially WWX, being told to his face his mother was cheap, character less person and there is hardly he can do anything about it.

She doesn't want to become this bitter person at all cost who hurts other. She gets lucky and eventually JZX finds out Yanli truly is a gem of a person , and they get married happily( however short while it lasted :( )

JC is...not thinking along the same line. He lives in the same house, sees the dysfunction and lives in it the same way as Yanli does, and instead of seeing past the narrative his mother spins, that all of their unhappiness is WWX's mother's fault somehow, rather than hers, he BUYS into it. He also thinks if WWX loyally serves him throughout his life, goes nowhere, marries no one, lives and dies for him as future sect leader, it would repair the "damage" done by WWX's mother and his father going away.

Madam Yu has basically told everyone , that everyone being in "their place" is what makes people happy and although JC can object to WWX being called a servant, it doesn't change the fact that he wants to treat him that way, keeping a man bound by chains of obligations and his conscience by his side forever because he cannot see past his mother's delusions. This is why being compared as less by his mother and others against WWX stings him a lot. His mother also told him he would be ABOVE WWX in heirarchy his whole life, he would serve HIM. So why is he more talented and prodigious than he?? why does nature and everyone remind him that he is not naturally deserve to act as WWX's master even though by birth privilege he would be??

That jealousy comes from a place of in-adequateness where he feels he deserves the place of being above WWX specifically in everything and lack of his dad's attention makes it personal for him. But as we see after WWX dies and he lives a cushy life with his golden core , that jealous insecure nature never truly goes away, it just gets redirected to other target like LWJ even ( who he cannot compete against since he is LEAPS ahead of him ). However with WWX when he was alive and when he comes back, it takes a visceral, malicious edge because WWX was supposed to only live and die for him SUBSERVIENT and yet he defected, made a name for himself, and got JZX and Yanli killed ( alongside Lotus Pier burned as far as he is concerned since like his mother taught him, in life always blame WWX and his parents when things go wrong, NOT THEMSELVES)

HOWEVER, they are also convinced Jiang Fengm/ian is a bad man for never liking Madam Yu, who pressured his family to get him married to her, when she KNEW he likes someone else, and then acting like him avoiding her and avoiding their son and paying more attention to Yanli and WWX, two kids his wife doesn't interfere on much, makes him the bad guy .

This is one of these scenes that truly stick as Wei Wuxian rescues the Wen remnants and is caught by Lan Wangji. After a verbal dispute, Lan Wangji is left shaken about the events and what is truly right/wrong and lets Wei Wuxian go. At this point, CQL Lan Wangji is very clearly shown to be questioning everything and not stopping Wei Wuxian is the most he can bear to do.

The problem is that after reading the book, Lan Wangji doesn’t actually fit the scene at all. And the scene doesn’t exist in the book for good reason.

Lan Wangji in the book is not some naive, spoiled youth blindly led by rules, or someone questioning what is right or wrong at a base level. Instead there is an entire extra detailing how even as a teenager he would go out and help people even if it meant sacrificing what he quietly wanted because his sense of responsibility means he will try to help where he can. We also know how even as a young child and his mother dead, he refused to move, defying every person, even Lan Qiren, waiting in the snow so he could see his mother one more time. He was called Hanguang-Jun by the people because he travels the lands and would go and help even if it was just a minor case and ignored by larger clans because it gave no benefits to them.

Nothing about Lan Wangji, Hanguang-Jun speaks of a man confused at witnessing cruelty, or human prejudice, discrimination or people fleeing from tyranny. The man just went through a war! He saw his sect attacked! And yet, in The Untamed, Lan Wangji is shown to be completely lost at being questioned by Wei Wuxian, when the truth is that if Lan Wangji had witnessed the camp and been with Wei Wuxian, he would’ve done the same with him. He would not have just stepped aside and dramatically stood in the rain as Wei Wuxian risked everything to save innocents. He would’ve gone with him.

Idk, him and Lan wangji were constantly put on action, each with their own clans and worries. Everyone always says that Wei Wuxian didn't have time to process his feelings, but neither did Lan Wangji. It was seeing Wei Wuxian in constant danger that I think made him realize the depth of his feelings (Not that he didn't have them before, but rather how much they affected him, not just that Wei Wuxian was a good man who walked a crooked path just to take care of everyone, but that he loved that man, a good man with a kind heart who the whole world villainized)

There was no time for actual feelings, but they were there, concern, care, love, Lan wangji always thought Wei Wuxian just wanted to make fun of him, and Wei Wuxian always thought that Lan Wangji was just worried about his cultivation because he couldn't tolerate it. It made sense to them to think that.

And in the second life, at first Wei Wuxian couldn't afford to be discovered, much less confide his identity to anyone, including Lan Wangji, because of course, after their last encounter on the battlefield, Lan Wangji, like everyone else, probably thought he was a villain after all, and anyways, he never liked him that much (or at the moment when it seemed like it, everything was ruined right after), so when Lan wangji just let Wei Wuxian be and did not pushed him away, he was confused, because, why could Lan wangji allow anyone to be this close to him?! And not punish him for it! suspicious...

Then Lan wangji knew it was him all along, but he still let him touch, and be close, thinking it was a kind of revenge for all his shameless acts in the past, it didn't bother Wei Wuxian ,he enjoyed playing with Lan Wangji, in no time they grew fond of eachother, did everything together, traveled together, when the truth about his resurrection came to light, and he saw that Lan Wangji still hadn't left his side, and Wei Wuxian started to day dream about how they could spend their lives together, he never got to think about that before, but he still dreamed, and then asked for a blessing to get married ,I don't think he would have asked if he didn't see it as possible, for them to get married.

And to the actual point, in the text, it finally says, that Wei Wuxian KNOWS he is special to Lan Wangji, he noticed, how Lan wangji treated him, how much he did for him, does for him, he was aware of the care, the fondness, the love, but he just couldn't name it, because he was afraid, what if it wasn't like that? It might look ridiculous to see all that Lan Wangji did and think "Maybe it's not like that" but again, it's Lan zhan, Lan Wangji , Hanguang-jun, he's just so good, and he loves and cares so much about those close to him, and fights for those in need, so it makes sense that Wei Wuxian thought so much about the "kind of special" he was to Lan Wangji (I am not an expert in Chinese, but I do know that there are more complex relationships regarding love in Chinese literature, such as "zhiji" that in western literature COULD be interpreted as a "platonic soulmate" but it would go beyond the romantic or platonic)

Also with Jiang Chengs comments about them as if they were being inappropriate just for hugging, the "he's just my friend" was more a way of protecting Lan Wangjis honor and then in the boat he thinks Lan Wangji's mad because of Jiang Chengs words, I think that, along with the uncertainty of not being able to decipher what Lan Wangji was thinking, made him hesitate a little.

So he wanted to make sure if Lan Wangjis feelings were inclined to romantic love first.

I wanted to know if my understanding of the text wasn't so far off, because I find sweet of Wei Wuxian knowing he wanted to spent the rest of his life with this man and him feeling so much joy and warm everytime Lan Wangji showed him his love, that when things went wrong he at the very least wanted to preserve their friendship ,but he just couldn't stand the fact that now they will not have the same closeness because he scared Lan Wangji away.

There’s not a point of time in the text where Wei Wuxian genuinely thinks that Lan Wangji hates him. The whole “enemies to lovers” thing is a narrative red herring before it’s revealed that wangxian have always trusted each other and stood at each others’ sides. Part of that reveal is that Wei Wuxian’s hesitance in revealing his identity to Lan Wangji is that he doesn’t want to put the other man in a bad spot by forcing him to choose between helping him or siding with his family, and when the the Koi Tower exposure happened and Lan Wangji stood by him, Wei Wuxian stopped worrying about it because he got his answer. Because lest we forget, Wei Wuxian’s identity gets exposed to Jiang Cheng right before Lan Wangji reveals he also knew, too, and Wei Wuxian just continues on with the investigation. He doesn’t want his identity revealed because it would be inconvenient, but he’s not actually hard-pressed to work overtime protecting it. And Wei Wuxian was dreaming about a life with Lan Wangji before he died the first time. That was never a second life-exclusive thing. Wei Wuxian second-guessing himself when his feelings for his crush are at risk of being exposed is just regular human behavior, that fear of being rejected by the one you love even though you know logically that you probably won’t be. This isn’t some wangxian-exclusive relationship hurtle. Lan Wangji keeps his feelings to himself for the same exact reason.

My issue with the weight Western fans put on zhiji is that it doesn't carry any kind of romantic implication. It is an acknowledgment of being best friends. There also the long standing issue in western context that "soulmate" is only romantic and the highest pinnacle of romance and this is heavily entrenched for the fandom circle and the fic tropes that are prevalent. They put that expectation from a western trope to the term zhiji. And I personally don't understand that as it's not remotely specific to romance so it really is strange to see this being propped up as much as it was for a good 4 years. There are many specific terms to imply romantic relationships and CQL did its best to NOT. With CQL it did try to wash out the implication of romance between Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji as much as it could for its initial scripting, it was horrendously offensive how fully it leaned its the "bros no homo" and why netizens made so much noise in retaliation.

And in that effort all that can be said is, I guess at least they can be called best friends on the plot line of CQL. But CQL Wangxian and MDZS Wangxian are certainly not at all the same, in interactions, relationship progression or intention. MDZS Wangxian don't need to be called "zhiji" because they ARE more than that. They explicitly say they're married and during their sexual escapades Wei Wuxian concedes that Lan Wangji is "the husband". CQL Wangxian are simply not meant for intent and purpose to be romantic and why at the end of their story they're able to separate as they do, because they are best friends.

When Wei Wuxian in MDZS says he could continue to wander alone if not for the fact he knew he couldn't be without Lan Wangji, because he is acknowledging his romantic love that extends beyond being the "just friends" he insisted they were to Jiang Cheng. That is world's different from CQL Wei Wuxian telling Lan Wangji "I thought of you once as Zhiji ( someone who understands me)".

Understanding someone is not the only thing that MDZS Wei Wuxian yearned for, he wanted every part of Lan Wangji together romantically and sexually. He couldn't be satisfied as "just friends" after crossing that line he was deliberately toeing. Friends was a comfortable excuse but he wanted more and was terrified that Lan Wangji didn't feel just as strongly as he did because he literally did believe Lan Wangji was that kind, sacrificing and taken advantage of. While Lan Wangji was going through that same dilemma.

Also, if Jiang Cheng actually cared for Wei Ying as a brother like MDZS fandom loved to treat that as a "faux" in the novel, Jiang Cheng would have announced to the Cultivation World that he considered Wei Ying as a brother like Jiang Yanli did and told the other cultivators to zip it without facing any major repercussions... The other clans wouldn't dare or have any reasons to rise up against the Jiang clan and for them, it would have been more beneficial for them to be on the good terms with Jiang Cheng than on the bad terms.

Fandom when the same MC has no issue with killing evil people in retribution or even self defense: 🫣😕 He's at best morally grey. How could he murder without remorse? If you think about it he's the real villain.

1. Helping Zuzhi Lang

Probably the most well known example of his kindness backfiring. He helps a snake and gets framed for starting a plauge for it.

2. Saving Cang Qiong disciples + more

When he's in his plant body, he can't bring himself to not free the Cang Qiong disciples from Sha Hualing, which ends up getting him caught by Luo Binghe.

3. Freeing Qiu Haitang

This one is something I think gets forgotten. While saving Cang Qiong disciples and other cultivators, he also frees Qiu Haitang. This backfires by leading to his confrontation with the Old Paalce Master and her in the Holy Mausoleum.

4. Helping the Qing Jing Peak disciples

While escaping the Water Prison, Shen Yuan sees the Qing Jing disciples get into a fight with Huan Hua disciples. He decides to step in by helping from the sidelines, and this backfires because he gets "caught", so to speak.

If there are any other instances where his kindness backfires in him, please remind me!

You forgot when Shen Qingqiu:

needlessly threw himself in front of Luo Binghe to protect him from Elder Sky Hammer, which poisoned him with Without-a-Cure until basically the end of the novel.

lost points for protecting Luo Binghe from Ming Fan and co on like his first day as a transmigrator.

stayed behind at Huan Hua palace to force Luo Binghe to give up his corpse to stop his unhealthy grieving, rather than running and escaping the moment everyone was distracted with Liu Qingge’s break in.

They defied direct orders, their war hungry bloodthirsty Sect Leader and risked their lives and of those closet to them to save Jiang Cheng and Wei Wuxian, hide them for days and safely smuggle them out. Wen Ning saved Jiang Cheng when he was captured. Wen Ning brought back Jiang Cheng’s parents bodies so they could be buried properly and given respect.

And when the wheel turned and Jiang Cheng was the one who could provide shelter and aid in return, he fell silent at the first pushback, sneered mockingly at the Wen remnants struggling to survive and pulled his blade with no hesitation at Wen Ning’s corpse to cut him down.

I’ve seen it in SVSSS where SQQ is considered to be untrustworthy about LBH and how everyone who is frightened of LBH and mistreats him is right to do so because there’s something wrong, it’s all over the place in MDZS in which especially JC’s bitter comments about WWX and everyone else are taken as gospel and WWX is treated as an idiot for rejecting this worldview, and it’s the most constant theme I see from TGCF where people are constantly lauding MQ and FX’s reactions to anything and rewriting romantic and powerful moments as creepy because for some reason, nothing good and happy can be trusted without a wet blanket being dropped on the scene to be unpleasant and weird.

I don’t know what it is that has people drawn to the idea that cynicism is truth and the worst interpretation is the one to rely on, but it’s just frustrating to no end. In three stories that all have happy endings for their leads and an improving world at the end because of their willingness to stand up for their beliefs and not let cynicism win, why has it become the most popular way to engage with these books?