THE FIRST KISS WAS SPITEFUL.
       at first his advances towards meredith were purely to feed his own ego, play the game he was best at--- one night stands. she was pretty, funny, mysterious. all the tributes that attracted the manwhore, himself. but his heart still ached for the redhead he had come to seattle for. and this little game of his became much more malice as time went on, the more he flirted, the angrier derek got, and well the angrier derek got--- the closer mark got to getting addison back. meredith was a mere pawn in the sick game to win who he thought was the love of his life, back. maybe he wasnât the best guy, but he was a man in love ( or so he thought--- he wasnât quite sure what that felt like ).Â
           idly stepping into the bar, a devilish grin grew across his face. meredith grey, sitting alone at the bar. stepping up to the counter he waved two fingers for Joe to get them two rounds. sliding into the seat a smirk slid up the corners of his lips as eyes drew towards her own gaze. âCome here often?â her response was a simple eye roll and mark knew he would have to work harder. he liked a chase. maybe this wasnât entirely to get Addison back after-all.Â
         the night went on and they talked till Joe practically kicked them out, wanting his own good nights rest.  for just a moment mark forgot about anything and everything on why he was here in Seattle and it got the better of him. leaning forward as he walked her to her car, lips connected in a short kiss, which would have been longer if meredith grey hadnât come to her senses and pulled back.Â
                   â donât let that happen again,â she replied, got in her car and left.
          derek has great taste in women.Â
THE SECOND KISS WAS GOODBYE...FOR NOW.
        it wasnât a quick recovery nor was it an easy one. mark was at peace for most of it, hoping just hoping him and lexie would meet again. but they never did, even in his dreams she had disappeared. the man had always been full of jokes and kept that composure around just about everyone in the hospital... everyone but meredith grey. they were two strong souls, finding weakness in showing any sort of emotion. running from emotion and fear only to create more. he found comfort in knowing that. they never talked about it. they never admitted it. they just sat in silence, contemplating it. both knowing what each one was thinking it, but never saying it out-loud. an unspoken friendship. it was refreshing to say the least.Â
            but once mark got better he knew the best thing for him was to move out of seattle. his plan was to go back to new york, or move to where addison was. have a start over. anything was better than the pain of having to see âgrey memorial hospitalâ plastered across every window. so with a heavy heart he said his goodbyeâs. derek and him sharing a brotherly hug, that almost took the air out of both of them.  a hand grasped averyâs shoulder and squeezed it tight. he was going to be a great head of plastics.Â
                and then he went to say goodbye to meredith. once again their words were brief and most interaction was unspoken. giving him a small hug she leaned forward and pressed a kiss on her cheek--- quite usual for meredith grey.Â
            he smirked and his last words before he walked out were âdonât let that happen again,âÂ
THE THIRD KISS WAS HELLO...YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN HERE SOONER.
                 he should have been at the funeral. he should have been a better man. a better friend. just a better person in general. but he hadnât been, and the surgeon flew down to seattle, took a taxi to the funeral, and never got out. he couldnât do it. lexie dying years ago was hard enough, this, now this was impossible. it had to be untrue. derek shepherd couldnât be dead. but he was, and mark sloan wasnât able to accept it. he took the taxi back to the airport and headed straight back, ignoring the constant calls from ms. shepherd. he didnât want to face anyone right. his emotions were beginning to show through, and he wasnât fond of that at all.
            months later the man returned to seattle, with no call ahead. he wanted to be able to cop out if he wanted to and letting people know of his arrival prevented that. stepping into the hospital after years he was shocked to see how much it had changed, it no longer held the dark tone of lexieâs death but the emptiness of derek shepherdâs vacancy.                        âiâm sorry,â
                                           that was the first thing he said to her the moment he locked eyes with her. he was sorry for everything. that derek had died. that she had to feel the same pain as him. that he hadnât show for the funeral. everything.   and after moments of stern stars and a few exchanges of harsh words, she finally agreed to grab coffee with him.  a brief hug and kiss on the cheek.Â
     and for once they didnât sit their in silence. they didnât talk about domestic stuff, or have any small talk. they just spoke about themselves, about how they felt. it was odd and out of both of their comfort zones, but just like always it was refreshing.Â
THE FOURTH KISS WAS FOLLOWED BY GUILT.Â
         he didnât think it would end up like this. that he would fall for her in this short amount of time, that this ordeal was possible. it was so wrong but felt ever so sweet. the mere thought of her had him acting like a giddy school boy all over again, a feeling he was never expecting to have again.  he had been working out of seattle for a few months now and derekâs death was finally out of the topic of conversation for the nurses gossip. things had gone back to as normal as they could be. except mark. mark couldnât go back to how things use to be.Â
             his arm snaked around her hip and pulled her forward. he let their lips linger for just a moment. breaths emanating from both their lips, connected. lips finally met as a hand came up to softly grasp her cheek, his whole body melting into the moment. and it wasnât until then did he realize how much he had been longing for this.Â
            but before he knew it was over and she was walking out of the door with a demeanor that carried a different tone then his own. he tried to run after her, but she waved him away.     Â
     THE FIFTH KISS WAS FILLED WITH ADORATIONÂ
      âis it because of derek or lexie? or are you just not feeling what iâm feeling? because if itâs the second one, iâll stop trying, we can go back to being just friends. but meredith, if itâs the first one, iâm not letting you go. i never thought iâd feel this way about someone again. i dated after she died, or at least i tried. but it was like i had just reverted back to my old ways, where sex was replaced with love. but then when i came back, i realized it was just because i hadnât found the right person. that right person is you. and you donât have to feel guilty anymore.âÂ
      it felt like hours the stood their in silence, hearing the crickets creek from outside. heart racing face as he wondered what she was thinking, for the first time he couldnât tell. but soon her feet picked up and before he knew it, she was in his arms and lips were locked.  a kiss filled with adoration and love rather than hatred and guilt.Â
                            âdonât let this happen again, huh?â he smirked
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