𐙚⋆.˚🧸˚.⋆𐙚

It was her junior year of college, and Y/n did not want to go to this party. But after rotting in her room for the past month, her best friend, Esme, basically forced her to. As they walked down the street, she lingered a bit behind from the rest of their group. It’s not that she wanted to dim their sparkle or make the night all about her… But she was really struggling to try to plaster that smile. 

It’d been a month since Shayne dumped her. A whole month! That should be more than enough time for her to be functional again… But the fact that it was her first time properly going out since sat heavily in her stomach. Pregaming to Fiona Apple also probably did not help her mood. Esme had to change the CD player from Sleep to Dream to some sort of R&B artist before she drank and wallowed too much. 

Walking toward the apartments just off campus, she crossed her arms over herself. In a little red tank top and matching skirt, she was defenseless against the night chill. Her kitten heels clicked against the sidewalk. Esme noticed her absence and turned around. She reached her hand out. 

“Don’t be sad. You look so incredibly hot.” Esme reassured.

She chuckled, “I need a cig.” 

“No. Stop it. You’re sobering up from the pre-game, and we need to get you a drink. Not a cancer stick.”

She raised her brows, intrigued, “I’ll bite…”

Once in the apartment building, the girls walked down the hallway and spotted the open door at the end of the hall. With TLC blasting from it and purplish light flooding out, it was definitely the party. Their pace picked up, excited at No Scrubs playing. 

She slowly walked in and was immediately somewhat grateful. It wasn’t like some other parties she had been to, where they were packed in like sardines. But it was still decently busy. The space wasn’t huge, but it worked for the amount of people. The main living room was turned into an impromptu dance floor where multiple girls danced and couples grinded. For the most part, though, people stood on the sidelines, drinking and talking. On the couch and bean bags, stoners sat smoking joints, making the place reek of weed. 

When the song changed to Family Affair by Mary J. Blige, a small sense of dread filled her. Esme gasped sharply.

“IT’S MY SONG.” She shrieked.

Okay. She couldn’t help but smile for her friend, who was barely even tipsy, but still so excited. Esme grabbed her hand and tugged her along to the living room area. Esme immediately started flipping her hair and shaking her body to the beat. Y/n, meanwhile, was still a little shy. She nodded to the beat. If she had another drink in her and it wasn’t her first night out as a single woman, she’d be dancing with little to no care. Which is why Esme exclaimed-

“Oh, my god. I KNOW you can dance better than that.”

She shook her head with a shy smile before starting to move more. Pointing her hands up to the sky, she let her hips move side to side. She closed her eyes and let her hands roam up and down her body. The familiar beat felt comforting.

Esme sang along directly to her. “WE JUST WANT YA’LL TO HAVE A GOOD TIME. NO MORE DRAMA IN YOUR LIFE.” 

She put her hands up in surrender, “Message received.”

“Good! Because that hot guy is staring at you.”

“What-” Her brows furrowed and followed Esme’s eyeline. 

Turning around, she could see a tall figure leaning against the front of the kitchen counter. In a navy Tommy Hilfiger polo and jeans, he crossed his arms. The short sleeves were tight around his biceps, which bulged when he did so. He was cute, with a round face that tapered to a point and dark, curly hair that was difficult to discern in the party lighting. 

And he was staring right at her. 

Once they made eye contact, he looked away with a shy smile before taking a casual sip from his solo cup. 

“Oh.” She said, turning back to Esme, “Yeah… Yeah, he’s really cute.” 

Esme’s eyes widened, and her lips pursed in expectation. 

“Go on. Go play.”

“Oh shut up. I’m not ready.” 

Esme groaned, “Ugh. Come on, girl. It’s been a month of nothing but ice cream and Fiona Apple, and 10 Things I Hate About You. I’m saying this as your friend. BUCK. THE FUCK. UP.” She looked over again, “Oh, look, he’s making his way to the kitchen. And you know who needs drinks? You. And me!”

She turned to see the guy rounding the counter and going into the kitchen. The light of the kitchen was a normal yellow tint, so she could now make out that his hair was a dark ginger. And that he looked even more handsome in the light. 

Esme’s head tilted with a shiteating grin, 

“Be a dear?”

She ran her hands down her face, “FINE. Fine. I’m doing this just for you.”

As she walked away, Esme called out,

“Fuck him for me too?”

She flipped her off as she strutted over. Okay. Okay. This is fine. Totally normal. It’d been a while since she’d been a fish in the ocean. Usually, she could hide behind the comforting shield of ‘Sorry, I have a boyfriend.’ But tonight… she didn’t have that excuse. And maybe she shouldn’t try to avoid it.

Walking into the kitchen, she looked up at the guy and realized just how tall he was up close. He was busy lining the neck of his beer bottle against the counter. In an instant, he slammed the heel of his palm against the top, and the cap peeled off with a loud thud and clink. Under the music, she heard a little grunt from him that made her breath hitch.

“Hi.” She blurted out suddenly. God. She was immediately regretting this. This was already a bad start. 

He noticed her, and his face lit up.

“Hi.” His voice was a little raspy. Cute.

Then she just stood there like a complete idiot. Her jaw dropped to say something, but nothing came out. Was she supposed to say something? What? ‘Come here often?’ No. No. That didn’t make any sense.

But before she could say something stupid, he spoke up again.

“I liked your dancing.” He said, walking up to her and speaking loud enough to be heard over the music.

“Thanks.” 

He put his hand to his chest. “I’m Stan.”

“Y/n.”

She was failing this social interaction miserably. She should say something. Invite him to dance. Ask him how his night was going. But the wording died on her tongue at every mere thought. And she could tell he was trying to decipher her, a little confused on her starting a conversation just to speak in one-word answers. 

Suddenly, he leaned down so his mouth was closer to her ear. Even though she knew it was just so she could hear him, she couldn’t help her reaction. The way her breath caught, heart pounding.

“Want a drink, sweetheart?” 

The hair on the back of her neck stood up straight, and she could’ve sworn a flurry of goosebumps sent up her arms. She quickly nodded. 

Stan stood up straight again. “What can I get ya? They’ve got…” 

He nodded for her to follow him. They walked over to the corner of the countertops, where a display of half-empty liquor bottles sat. 

“Vodka. Some sodas for mixers. Tequila.” He thumbed through the bottle tops and let out a chuckle, “Whiskey… I’m sure you don’t want that. And some beers. Coors. Heineken-”

“Can you just- pass me the vodka?” She stammered nervously. 

“Yes, ma’am.” 

With a smirk, he pulled out a bottle of Smirnoff and handed it over. She held it by the neck and walked in front of him to scan the soda options. He leaned his back against the counter next to her, taking a sip of his own drink. 

Instinct took over as she bit the bottle lid between her teeth and poured a hefty amount of vodka into her cup. God, it had been a while since she’d gone out to party. Shayne never liked her going out. Meanwhile, Stan just raised his brows as she spat the cap out and opened the Coke liter with a hiss. 

“You’re wanting a fun time tonight, huh?” Stan asked, watching her finish pouring her Vodka Coke, heavy on the vodka.

She took a sip. Yup. It was just as strong as she used to make them. She nodded.

“It’s my first time out in a long time.” 

He grinned, “That’s awesome. We should celebrate.”

He tilted his beer bottle toward her, and she clinked her plastic solo cup against his with a giggle. She took another sip of her drink and took a deep breath. On her heavy exhale, she tried to let all the nervousness go away. C’mon, girl. It’s not that hard to speak to a guy. A very cute guy. But still.

“I think it’s my turn to contribute to the conversation.” She looked nervously down at her shoes before looking back up at him. “What’s your major, Stan?”

“Biology.” 

Her head tilted. That wasn’t what she expected. A guy this hot and partying would normally be a business major. Especially since he was built like a jock. 

“Now what made you wanna do that? Study… organisms and science.”

He chuckled and shook his head. His smile was crooked in the sweetest possible way. It was clear he was shy about it by the way he looked away every time he smiled. 

“It’s a long story.” He nodded at her, “What’s your major?”

“English. I like to write.” 

The conversation was so commonplace, yet he hung onto every word she said. His eyes were fully devoted to her.

“What do you write?” 

“Fiction? Been working on a lot of science fiction.”

He practically choked on his drink. 

Her brows furrowed, “What? What’s so funny?”

“Shit. Nothin’. Nothin. I just- I have experience that could help you.”

She was curious now. How on earth could he have experience with sci-fi? Then she realized… duh! He was a science major! That’s why… No other reason. 

“Yeah! You could fact-check my work.”

Just then, she happened to look over at the group of guys who walked in. And her heart fell into her stomach. Her face completely sobered as it felt like an elephant sat on her chest. This couldn’t be happening. This literally couldn’t be happening. 

Lo and behold, in the group of guys stood Shayne. He looked worse than she had last seen him. His hair was nearly buzzed, and he looked somehow more smug. More like a douchebag. Seeing him in a backwards cap and tee, she felt like an idiot for dating him in the past. 

Stan noticed her freeze, and his expression grew more concerned. He tensed up when she inhaled a shaky breath. 

“You okay? What’s up?”

But she barely registered it. She was too focused on Shayne walking in and noticing her. He looked just as surprised. She tried to send a telepathic message to him- GO AWAY. PRETEND YOU NEVER SAW ME. Clearly, it didn’t go through since he started to weave through people to try to get to her. 

“Oh god-” She started to hyperventilate. 

Shayne was getting closer and closer. The music suddenly felt too loud, and the room felt swelteringly hot. Stan looked between her and him, worry struck across his face. 

“Hey, what’s going o-”

But he didn’t finish his sentence because she suddenly grabbed Stan’s cheeks and pulled him in for a kiss. He let out a muffled yelp, beer splashing onto the tile. But after a moment to process, he closed his eyes and started to kiss back. 

With her eyes shut tightly, she focused on the sensation of his lips against hers. He tasted like beer with the faintest hint of spearmint gum. His lips were surprisingly soft. The music faded out of her consciousness, leaving just the panting sounds of their breaths. 

He quickly put the beer down on the counter and wrapped his arms around her, letting his wrists cross each other on her lower back. She crept her hand up the back of his hair and scratched at his curls. He let out a small moan at that before smashing his lips back onto hers. 

After a moment that felt like eternity (not that she was complaining), she pulled back. He kept his forehead against hers. 

“What was that about?” He asked, laughing slightly in disbelief. 

She peered over, trying to tell if Shayne had left. And after she determined he had gone away, she stepped back. 

“I’m so sorry.” She panted.

His brows furrowed, a little confused, but a sense of genuineness appeared behind his hazel eyes. He put his hand on her shoulder as her head whipped around. She was completely on edge.

“Hey. Hey. Want some fresh air?”

She nodded, and he began to lead her out; his hand strayed to her lower back. He nodded, talking more to himself than her.

“Yeah. Yeah, some air’ll do you some good.”

They walked out of the party and down the stairs to the outside of the lobby. She stepped forward toward the sidewalk. The rush of fresh air was a complete relief. A cold breeze slapped her face, and she felt much better almost immediately. She took a few big breaths before turning back to find Stan standing by the entrance, just watching her. The street lamps and entry lights lit them in the dark. 

He put his hands in his pockets. “Can I ask what was up with that guy? Do I need to beat his ass?”

She laughed at that and slowly blinked. She wished she were a lot drunker for this conversation. 

“I wish. But it’s not that bad.” 

He carefully made his way over. She slumped down to sit on the curb and patted the asphalt next to her in defeat. Pursing his lips, he shrugged and sat down. She held her knees to her chest and looked down at the rough street below. 

Guilt gnawed at her. Yes, she had wanted to kiss him, of course. But she had also… kinda used him. 

“Remember when I said it’s my first night out in a long time?”

He nodded, but let her continue. 

“That was my ex-boyfriend.” 

“Oh…” He murmured. He looked down at his sneakers and swallowed before getting the courage to ask, “When did you guys break up?”

Her shoulders hiked up anxiously, “A little over a month ago?”

“That’s… That’s not too bad.” He tried to reassure, “How long were you together?”

Her eyes started to tear up. More out of embarrassment rather than actual breakup pain. 

“It’s so stupid. It wasn’t even that long. Six months? He’s just a complete douchebag…”

“Yeah. I gathered that from the backwards hat.” He joked so sincerely.

She laughed again and was able to keep the tears at bay. 

“He cheated on me. Which is funny because he never wanted me to go out and party because he was so scared that I’d cheat on him.” 

He put his arms on his knees. “So I definitely should go beat his ass.”

“Nah. I had it coming. I was totally naive.”

“Don’t say that. You didn’t deserve that.”

There was silence between them. The music above was muffled but could be heard from the floors below. She wouldn’t be surprised if the party got busted. Crickets chirped as the street lamps buzzed, creating a nighttime symphony. 

She finally got herself to say,

“So… I’m really sorry for kissing you like that. I-I mean, I should’ve at least asked you.” 

He shrugged.

“I would’ve said yes.”

She looked over to find that he had been looking at her the whole time. Admiring her. Even when she wasn’t exactly being fun and smiley and the life of the party. She actually felt like a bunch of broken pieces. A complete mess. But he looked at her like she was completely worth the time. 

He leaned back on his hands. “Hey. It’s not so bad. I got to kiss a pretty girl. Save her from her douchebag ex. Even if it didn’t mean anything to her, the karma outweighs it, I think-”

“Wait, wait, wait-” She found herself speaking before thinking, “It wasn’t nothing.  I-”

She swallowed. Her tongue involuntarily clicked against the roof of her mouth as she tried to think this through. Until she suddenly shot up. Looking down at him, she threw her hand out.

“I want to start over.”

His eyes sparkled under the street lamps as he looked up at her. His mouth dropped slightly in surprise before it slowly melted into a smile. He took her hand and shook it as he stood up. 

She took a nervous breath.

“Hi. I’m Y/n. I was dragged to this party by my friend because I got dumped a month ago and haven’t gone out in nearly a year.”

He squeezed her hand.

“Hi, Y/n. I’m Stan, a complete doofus who feels real lucky talking to a girl like you.” 

Their nervous smiles sparked a few giggles as they stopped shaking hands. Butterflies fluttered in her stomach, adrenaline pumping. She rocked back and forth on the balls of her feet.

“Well… Stan… You’re really cute. Would it be crazy to say that I want to kiss you? For the first time ever and totally not the second?” 

He strutted up as if he had been waiting the whole time. His calloused hands landed on the divot of her waist and hips. 

“Stole the words from my mouth.” He murmured before leaning down to press his lips against hers. 

This time, she completely relaxed into it. Her arms wrapped around his neck. When he pulled her against him, she let her body completely fold. Her back arched as he splayed his hand against her upper back. She let out a little noise, and it seemed to spur him on more. 

In between kisses, he managed to get out, “Date? Tomorrow? Is that too fast?”

She chuckled and nodded.

“I’d love to.” And she shook her head, “No. It’s not too fast. I’m more than ready.”