Robert Pattinson's Girl

Rob's Pov

⎯ You betrayed her Robert! Do you know what that means?!

⎯ Mom, I didn't want to

⎯ Shut up! ⎯ my mother yells at me ⎯ Did I raise you badly? Didn't I give you a certain education? Why the hell did you betray her!?

⎯ That's not it

⎯ Oh, it's not Robert. And don't even think about thinking that I'm going to wipe you out because I won't ⎯ she explains ⎯ Shit Robert, cheat on her?

⎯ This is a matter between me and her ⎯ I reply ⎯ Only she and I will know. ⎯ I didn't raise you like this.

⎯ For mother, please.

⎯ You had a family, a son Robert ⎯ she looks at me with depravity ⎯ You were happy with her, you had my grandson.

⎯ Harry died mom, ok. My son died, that's enough, it's over!

⎯ No, sir Robert Pattinson did not pass ⎯ she mocks ⎯ She was on guard for your son, she was in need of comfort!

⎯ And you think I didn't need comfort? ⎯ I reply ⎯ It's not JUST about her mom, not all about Y/n!

⎯ At least she calls her parents ⎯ I grumble in response ⎯ Without her you wouldn't even come here.

⎯ Do you want to make her a son? Go do it! ⎯ I answer cold

⎯ The same thing they did to you one day, you are causing it to her and without any pity ⎯ she lifts my face ⎯ I hope that one day she forgives you my son, or, you will be happy with this girl. But never forget that the wrong was you and not her.

⎯ I didn't want to go ⎯ I start to cry remembering the scene ⎯ I didn't want to betray her...and...it was a moment of weakness.

⎯ You're wrong ⎯ hug the short lady in front of me ⎯ I don't want to lose like I lost my mother son ⎯ bitter crying ⎯ I don't want to lose Y/n!

⎯ I'm sorry, you already lost her Robert. And it was like that for the next few days, looking through her things in small numbers in my apartment with giant memories.

I miss you my love, I miss Harry, I miss your smell, your warmth, your body and your love for me.

⎯ Get up now! ⎯ Victoria opens the bedroom door going to the window letting the light in ⎯ Come on Robert.

⎯ Leave me the fuck alone ⎯ I mumble through the sheets

⎯ What a fucking apartment huh, you took care of yourself now it's all dirty! ⎯ she keeps opening the windows

⎯ Get the fuck out of here, seriously leak! ⎯ I sit on the bed

⎯ "Get out of here" is the fuck, go take a shower and wait for me in the living room ⎯ she looks at me ⎯ I'm asking Robert!

⎯ Seriously Victoria leave me alone ⎯ I reply

⎯ Take off your clothes, young man, and go straight to the shower now, take as long as you want, you're the one who pays the bill ⎯ she finishes talking and but once it comes to your memory

Flashback: 2012, December 23

The room was dark with no life whatsoever, clothes on the floor, articles torn and looking like a movie set. I light another cigarette in the middle of the darkness that was, until I hear a knock on the bedroom door.

⎯ Rob, I know you need to be alone but ⎯ my girl's voice echoed through the doorway ⎯ You don't have to stay like this, without eating, without washing. Damn Robert it's Christmas ⎯ she walks into the room

⎯ That's why it's Christmas, you should be with your family, right? ⎯ I reply hoarse from the cigarette Y/n was a very good person for me, she was my Brazilian who surrounded me with party and joy.

She had the unique way that if the world knew her it would be enchanted, she knew about feelings, sensations and emotions. She writes erotic books and they are wonderful and horny on anyone, I love this girl for the simple fact that she is human and doesn't like herself sometimes but is who she really is. No filter or shit, just Y/n Arantes. Lying in bed laughing, I look at her seeing her eyes on me.

⎯ You're the one I never want to lose ⎯ I pull her body into mine ⎯ I need you, you're my best friend and my lost soulmate.

⎯ That was a compliment Mr. Pattinson?

⎯ I nod yes ⎯ You will never lose me, I will always be here with you regardless of whether I'm with someone or not.

⎯ I love you ⎯ I whisper to her giving her a small kiss on the forehead

⎯ I love you too, my love ⎯ he gives me a quick kiss ⎯ My little Robert.

End of Flashback

⎯ My little Robert ⎯ I whisper to myself whimpering

⎯ Are you crying Robert? ⎯ Victoria lifts my face ⎯ Talk to me go

⎯ I wish it had worked out ⎯ I answer sadly ⎯ Go Victoria I lost my son, damn it's hard. ⎯ Cheating wasn't the expensive option, even more so with her ⎯ she replies and crouches in front of me

⎯ I came here to curse you.

⎯ Go on, say I'm a motherfucker, bastard, heartless or worse ⎯ look down ⎯ Look at this fucking apartment, I still feel her here with me!

⎯ She didn't die Robert

⎯ You needed to see her disappointed look looking at me, she has the same fucking Harry look ⎯ crying ⎯ She was upset with me

⎯ Why betray her Robert? You had it all.

⎯ I don't have anything else, because everything I had I'm losing ⎯ I throw myself on the bed ⎯ I want her!

⎯ Who did you cheat on her with? ⎯ Victoria throws herself next to me ⎯ With a whore? With your ex? go talk

⎯ With the ⎯ grumble ⎯ Never mind

⎯ It matters to me Robert, who knows what that person can say out there. Fuck, it's Harry, it's the breakup and if this falls into the hands of any journalist, then the fuck is Y/n.

⎯ What are you talking about? ⎯ I'm saying that the attacks she's been suffering since Harry's death are not few ⎯ she gets up and takes her cell phone

⎯ Look! I start reading the comments about me and Y/n.

@robslover:this bitch never asked herself why Robert was with her

@mylovepattinson:Y/n fucking trash! Making my baby suffer!

@pattiworld:Fdp man taker dude, well done losing that fucking troublesome kid!

@ sukiandrob: I hope she dies next time like this child she was carrying, DISGUSTING FUCK

⎯ Victoria arrives.

⎯ See what she has to spend this time Robert ⎯ she sighs ⎯ I trusted you so much, I thought they would marry and be happy, but the fuck you take and fuck someone

⎯ I was trying Victoria but I don't know, I was stupid.

⎯ Give me her ring go ⎯ she holds out her hand ⎯ For you to get out of her life go

⎯ No, the ring is not

⎯ Have an ounce of feelings for her shit, give it to me and I'll give it to her.

⎯ You don't know what it's like to love Victoria ⎯ I look at the ring

⎯ Who loves doesn't hurt or betray Robert, doesn't remember Kristen and I'm sure you remember that it was Y/n who was with you when you were down ⎯ she throws the words at me

⎯ Get out of here go ⎯ She leaves ⎯ by eye

⎯ She wants to leave here Robert.

⎯ But she can't have her job, her house, her friends and even her family here!

⎯ BUT SHE DOESN'T FUCKING HAVE YOU! ⎯ she screams ⎯ YOU HURT THE GIRL AND GET THAT GUILT FACE BECAUSE IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT!

⎯ I know that!

⎯ Give me the ring and let her get on with her life Robert and I as your sister want you to do it for her or your son ⎯ she says ⎯ If you really consider your son's death to be you Robert Pattinson, you're going to give this to me and will disappear from her life.

⎯ You are nobody to decide what I do Victoria, the story is between her and me and nobody else!

As 1 week has passed, 2 months have passed since Harry happened, I may still be recovering but I'm a little better than before to be more exact and if it depends I wouldn't be. I started to leave the room more often, I went back to my house, sometimes I visit Harry with flowers he would like. I could be in the last phase of grief, acceptance, I knew my son would never come back and I knew I would remember him forever. It was the most beautiful and pure chapter of my life and it will continue to be, my parents call me everyday asking me about my day or how I'm doing. I went back to drinking. Robert, we don't pull away but it seems like we're the line of distances, everyday or when he gets it he lies next to me, puts his arms around my waist and falls asleep with me. Something in both of us has changed and we know that our relationship has gone downhill, we are distant and sometimes a little close. We no longer have the issue of love at the moment, he always comes back late and already tired I can't judge him I arrived like this, I think the relationship is no longer the same, we are both healed and now it's time for new air. I love Robert but I love him enough to let him go.

⎯ How was his day? ⎯ look at him ⎯ Rehearsals with Dior, interview for a magazine, no big deal ⎯ he answers ⎯ And yours?

⎯ Looking for a job and talking to Noah a few times ⎯ sigh ⎯ Don't look at me like that, I lost that huge job and there's no turning back.

⎯ Come home, to our house, you and I.

⎯ Our relationship is so far from us ⎯ I reply ⎯ Robert, I think we should take it easy, all over again.

⎯ You know ⎯ he gets up

⎯ That's your problem Robert, we hardly ever talk to each other and when we do it's just to say "it's ok".

⎯ As if you were the right one here, right ⎯ he replies ⎯ You closed in on me, before it was you and me Y/n and now we're not even half of it!. Do you think this is how I want to live this way!?

⎯ If you can forget about our son faster than me, congratulations Robert ⎯ I get up ⎯ For me this shit is still in my head ok!

⎯ Stop using our child for excuses!

⎯ HE DIED ROBERT! ⎯ shout at him ⎯ OUR SON IS DEAD!

It was a little easier to say it out loud than to think and state the sentence in thought.

⎯ We need time.

⎯ I'll get my things and leave ⎯ he enters the room and I stare at the floor until the cell phone rings and I look

"Yara" the name flashed on Robert's cell phone screen, why was she calling him at 9 pm on a Friday? Wouldn't he be cheating on me or something? I go to my room and stop him.

⎯ You know when I stayed with you when Kristen cheated on you, you said you would never do the same Robert and you saw the state you were in that fucking day! ⎯ he looks at me ⎯ So why the fuck, at this time of night my stepsister is fucking calling you!?

⎯ It's nothing you're thinking about.

⎯ I swear Robert, I hope this is a fucking lie ⎯ I touch your face ⎯ Tell me this is all a lie Please tell the truth.

He looks at me with that same look as when he was wrong with me, he takes my hand and I take a deep breath.

⎯ I'm not cheating on you ⎯ he speaks and I hand him the ringing cell phone

⎯ Answer Robert, please ⎯ he answers and turns on the sound

- Hi blondie, how are you?

- Why are you calling me at this time Yara?

- Wow, how bad, I missed my favorite brother-in-law

- Miss what?

- You know, of our nights, you and I together. In that motel remember?

⎯ Robert ⎯ I sigh looking at him

- There's nothing like a motel Yara, are you delirious?!

- Yes, yummy, I'm delirious later that night! He hangs up his cell phone and throws it on the bed and hugs me.

⎯ Please don't go please ⎯ he asks hugging me ⎯ Sorry fuck sorry, please, please Y/n don't go away!

⎯ Let me go ⎯ I speak without a voice

⎯ Please Y/n, it was a please moment and it wasn't like that...

⎯ LEAVE ME THE FUCK! ⎯ I take the air

⎯ Please ⎯ he whispers and I push him away ⎯ Let's talk please.

⎯ I was guarding and mourning our son and you betraying me Robert!? ⎯ I speak indiguinated ⎯ OUR SON DIED AND YOU TRAINED ME!?

⎯ I DON'T BETRAY YOU!

⎯ Oh no, you didn't cheat on me Robert, really? ⎯ I approach him ⎯ Was what she said a lie? Or did I hear wrong!? Go SPEAK!

⎯ I DON'T BETRAY YOU! ⎯ he insists

⎯ So what the fuck did you do to her Robert? ⎯ clean my face ⎯ Please speak for your remaining dignity!

⎯ I went out with her a few times and... A... We talked and she understood me!.. ⎯ he responds stuttering

⎯ So she understands you!?, really Robert?! ⎯ I sit on the bed ⎯ We were going to get married, I was going to try a child again Robert and you go and do this with my sister!? ⎯ he kneels in front of me

⎯ There was no sex I promise, it was just drinking and nothing else ⎯ he starts crying

⎯ Please don't go away, please go away.

⎯ The same thing they've done to you is doing to me.

⎯ I don't betray you, for our son Y/n!

⎯ STOP TALKING ABOUT HIM!

⎯ I'm sorry, please ⎯ he takes my hand ⎯ Forgive me, please!

⎯ Take your things and get out of here Robert.

⎯ Please Y/n, let me explain please ⎯ he insists.

⎯ I won't repeat, take your things and leave ⎯ the eye ⎯ You're dead to me Robert Pattinson.

With time the pain of the two would dissolve according to the media, the two knew that the pain was the feeling now both physically and mentally, a child was something that the two had had in their dreams. It was the chance for the two to fulfill their dreams and settle down, everything was ready, clothes, house, money, and it wasn't even for the money but for the son. The pressure on Y/n was even greater than Robert's was things and troubling sensational headlines even, it was things like: "She was too weak", "It was all her fault", "She deserved more". The whole world knew about the loss but they only welcomed Robert for his position, in addition to the machismo and prejudice about the girl her name was being used on several horrible occasions, a mother always wants the good of her child and even if it hurt a lot, Robert and S /n knew that the best thing for little Harry was for him to go in peace. Y / n is now the mother of an angel who looks at her from above every day and keeps her face and little body in memory of her. 1 month of the loss and they were still reporting on websites, magazines, gossip newspapers and just listening to Robert's part. He is not to blame and positioned himself in various situations about what he wanted or did not want to say, he returned to smoking and drinking, he had promised in his beloved's pregnancy that he would not do anything like that to preserve the health of the beloved and her angel. They buried the little one and it was the image they will never forget. Some famous and friends of the two manifested and left their condolences to the couple, Y/n's parents returned to Brazil and insisted the little girl to go with them to clear her head but she didn't want to. Since then Robert has given her as much love and tried to be strong but the mother misses her son, they no longer have the intimacy of intimacy, sex, touch, they were not prepared for that. Maybe someday there would be a chance to have another chance to be happy again. Y/n spent a lot of time in the hospital, postpartum depression was the cause, crying coerced by the fear of going out on the streets and being attacked. She never deserved this and neither of them could do anything. Robert's parents always supported them both, his sisters knew HOW hard it was for both of them, Y/n's friends too. They won't go through life together but their hearts will be together even if the world ends, Robert Pattinson and Y/n Arantes will ALWAYS love each other. ⎯ How was your day? ⎯ Noah asks her friend next to Robert ⎯ It was normal. ⎯ Noah knew that his friend was gathering all her strength to answer ⎯ Tell me about yours. ⎯ Anna and I went to the park today, you should have gone ⎯ he replies and she looks down sadly ⎯ But I'm glad you had this big guy here, huh. ⎯ Yeah, glad he was here ⎯ she replies and settles down next to him ⎯ Did you meet anyone? ⎯ Yes and no, well it was a glimpse ⎯  Noah responds and looks at Robert ⎯ Are you okay? ⎯ Huhm ⎯ he replies, Robert was recovering better than Y/n just like she was when he needed her. ⎯ Tell me more ⎯ Y/n asks her friend to smile because she is interested It was few moments that Y/n was interested in something, Robert wished his mind was too busy not to think about what had happened, Noah was her best friend and he came every day to see his friend and try to cheer her up. ⎯ How did she spend the night last night? ⎯ It was a small advance, the doctors said she is starting to accept it but it's too early to say anything about it ⎯ Rob responds by covering his beloved in bed ⎯ This shit they're talking about her is so cruel, how can they think something like that about the girl ⎯ Noah wanted to cry now ⎯ Take care of her Robert, she's still very hurt. ⎯I am caring. But was Robert weak too?, had he gotten over the death of his son?, or, he just hoped that someday his life would be normal. The day in Los Angeles was even a little too cold for the temperatures there, Robert walked covered in the icy streets, it was the warmth he wanted so much at

*narrator on*

For all those who have lost a child and the feeling of guilt is anger makes their head now, well people are human and have feelings no matter how big or small, they will always have their own answers. Saying goodbye to a person is a strange pain that never seems to go away and that hurts most of our chest, that feeling of guilt and anger at oneself is comforted by coldness. When someone is lost, feelings organize themselves to appropriate the address in the dark place of life, look at the sky and see the stained in its blue moonlight.

Even though they were aware that death could come for the little one, both of them had the feeling of hope between them that to this day he pulsates to know his true face. Your child's happy face will be forever etched in your memories that are now being stained with grief, the famous feeling of discrediting and reinforcing. You can't predict the future or change the past, and maybe we should learn from our present if it hurt you in the future you will know and if in the past it made you happy, today in the present they feel grateful.

An image of a strong man and woman who are never shaken is the purest lie, it's small fractions of courage to try again but they are giant reasons to give up. Harry wasn't a child who came to earth just to show his love in hours and go back to heaven, but to show everyone that love is real, he really wanted to go back and stay in his mother's arms, feeling her warm lap and your heart like a beautiful piano, I really wanted to have the life that was directed but your little place is now in the immense love of your parents. Harry could say and describe his parents in beautiful and beautiful words, purity and innocence, work and effort, sadness and rupture, a passionate Brit and connected to a Brazilian safe with everyone.

At the moment the house was painful, it was the house that Robert and Y/n had chosen to raise little Harry there with them. Outside the gates there were many people, reporters, paparazzi and present, it was a fact, they knew that there had been the first tragedy of the Pattinson family but not everyone was there with good intentions. Many wanted a positioning of the same to create a sensationalist news on the networks to earn raises and even a promotion, when you have fame you carry the burden of feeding on fake caresses and real pain, that world lost the total color it had at the time that the little being stopped breathing.

It was difficult for Robert to see that empathy was the biggest fault in the world, the house was closed by curtains that went to the floor giving little light in all the rooms. The sky was sadder than the weather in Los Angeles was predicted, channels around the world reported the loss of Robert Pattinson but not the true feeling of Y/n Arantes. She felt her son all the time until her last tear, it was killing the house, everyone was busy with their bodies and their minds alone and dark. Finally, the ray of light is gone.

Robert had to be strong to help his mate and he owes it to her in every way. They were boyfriends but both knew that their relationship was much more than just "boyfriends" there was the passion of centuries, the chemistry of years and the pure essence. Looking at his relatives taking turns to see how they were making him angrier with himself, it wasn't his fault or anyone else's, it was science.

⎯Rest Robert I see her,she is my daughter I know her well⎯it was true for Robert he and Paulo knew his way of dealing with pain.

⎯I'll try to dismiss everyone downstairs, I'll take care of the housework and the funeral⎯there was pain in Robert's voice and as hugs were the way Arantes show love it was no different

⎯Don't blame yourself or cover yourself, it was a loss and there will be others but Harry is too proud of his father⎯Paul tells Robert he was sniffling with tears⎯There is a difference between all the moments and this is those moments when you you need to put your head down and see the calm of human contact, today in that room my daughter cries but in a long time she will get over it.

⎯He was a lot like her⎯he wipes her face after hearing his father-in-law's words

⎯ He was yes, don't worry about crying and giving up because we are parts of human lives that suffer, suffering is everyone Robert now needs to accept his.

Paulo was not good with words as his daughter was writing loves but they shared the same feeling of insecurity and living, two hearts formed one and from that one heart was born Robert's favorite person. He waited for her for only 3 years but he waited for millions of years and in other lifetimes.

It was him for her and she for him always.

With a sinking heart and solemn anguish he entered their shared room, she was sitting there by the window listening to the crowd scream instead of silence. With silent footsteps Rob takes her to his chest and strokes her head, that's comfort.

⎯I could go back in time and save him⎯she says in her crying voice and it was not her custom to cry

⎯Need to get some sleep and eat⎯he suggests thinking listening to her mate's low cries⎯Don't cry, look at me.... honey.

Eye contact is the smart and formal way to communicate. There was only pain and loss in her eyes there, it killed him.

⎯ It's okay⎯ it wasn't but it was time for him to be the strong one⎯ It's going to be okay, my love.

In days Robert didn't call her that, she didn't want to be called or heard she just wanted to be left for dead.

⎯ It's wrong to cry like a child, I should be tidying up the funeral and house daddies⎯ Y/n says wiping her eyes trying to take away all the worry Robert had about her ⎯ I want to go home, to my house.

⎯Yes of course⎯it was not the choice to walk away from him or her today the need was to join

⎯Come on⎯she puts a fake, sad smile on her lips to face the crowd.

There were all kinds of fans and representatives that had already taken a large proportion, the world of celebrities had already known and resolved how to be discreet. It was a life the motive and it was a thousand problems.

And in the moonlight of the night, they lay in the same bed with complete respect. Y / n still had labor pains and stitches but what hurt that it wasn't her son who would wake her up at dawn but her sad nightmares with the death of the little one.

⎯Y/n....

⎯Yes⎯whispering

⎯I love you⎯Rob says and it was the purest truth

⎯I love you too little Robert⎯she replies in all sadness

It was never height or anything related to Rob; little Rob's promise was always little Harry's conquest that for Y/n, his reasons were small to give up and giant to be in his heart.

Warning; Contains a trigger and an account of a mother who lost her child, if you are sensitive do not read.

This is the point of view of Harry's little life with his mother.

On July 25th at almost 5 am you arrived in the world, fragile and too small. I carried you for 6 months and it was 6 months, you couldn't have come today but you did, with your little cry announcing your giant arrival. Today you a beautiful baby made me a better woman, made me a stronger and noticed woman, you are not just a small human but a great warrior from now on.

I heard your low cry but it was the most beautiful music to my ears, it was in a bathtub, in a humanized and premature birth that brought you to life.

Your father was a great helper for your arrival, he has been with me since you were made until this time. You have his face and frame and even with your fragile little body reveals a big brave boy, of those who would surely protect everyone around you.

All my pain was gone the moment you were, but now the pain is different, at this moment the pain I carry is the pain of losing you and not being able to tell you how important you are to me.

Your father will love to hold you in his lap and tell you a thousand whispers that you are strong and that you can.

The moment you arrived, Marcos wrapped you up and placed you on my lap showing me that you were alive and well, I looked your complete gaze at me and your body was so tiny, Harry, my private little crowd.

⎯He's so beautiful⎯I say because I didn't have the strength to cry⎯It's our baby Robert.

⎯You did it my love⎯ he whispers in my ear smiling

⎯Hey mom, it's me⎯I reply trying to keep my conscience clear⎯Hey mommy.

⎯Robert⎯Marcos talks approaching⎯She's going to faint⎯he says and everything becomes even darker

Harry you were so full and so natural in my arms, you were in complete control of me at that time and all I wanted to do was see you and take care of you.

I already imagined our trips to Brazil, I would show you the beaches of Rio, the great buildings of São Paulo, the entire Goiânia culture for you. Brazil would be ours, you would be my private crowd along with your father. Would love to see you in some of the thousands of pictures they would take of you, would protect you from the worst and protect you from death, you are just a little baby and a baby that will survive.

I wake up with my mind dizzy and not feeling as muscular as possible, I assume it's an anesthetic for the pain of the stitches.

⎯Woke up, you did so well⎯the crying voice of my father beside my mother relieves me

⎯Where is he?, where is my son? Robert?⎯I worry

⎯Hey, it's okay. They took Harry for normal procedures and Robert is with him⎯ my dad responds and I look at my crying mom

⎯ Mom, why are you crying?

⎯You are as strong as I imagined⎯she replies sure of my mother I could see the fear in her eyes

⎯Come on, Rob needs to come in⎯my says saying goodbye and making room for Robert who comes in with a surgical outfit

⎯Robert....⎯I say to him taking my hand and smiling

⎯ You were so strong, thank you so much for all that strength⎯ he says kissing my hand ⎯ Harry, he's fine but with complications in his lung, he's with Marcos.

⎯Bring him here, please⎯he helps me sit up and going

It was there that I truly saw you, you wrapped in blankets and wearing your first outfit I chose for you. Your father put you on my lap and I was filled with emotion to see what I had created, fed and brought to this true world in hours. All worry was abducted as I laid your little head against my chest to see you breathing.

⎯He looks so much like you⎯I say proud of myself with the little one on my lap⎯Harry Thomas Arantes Pattinson

⎯Yes, he looks like me but he has your look⎯he replies smiling and sitting next to my bed⎯Y/n....

⎯Please, I beg of you....⎯cry making as little noise as necessary⎯Leave me with him, he is a healthy and strong baby.

⎯ It's not within our reach, I don't want to either.

⎯He is our son Robert, we fought so hard to have him here⎯I take a deep breath

⎯Y/n.....⎯he looks at me with the most beautiful eyes in the world⎯Marcos said that, it's normal to happen.

⎯Fuck Rob, normal?⎯I say terrified⎯He's a baby.

⎯ I know my love ⎯ He wipes my tears and I see it hurt him too ⎯ He's our baby and always will be, but it's the facts...

⎯I don't want to lose our son Robert, I don't.

14 hours after giving birth.

The hours could pass but no time is enough for me to stay by your side Harry, can you hear my help for you?. Looking at you inside a cramped incubator with artificial air without you by my side, kills me, slowly and forever.

My crowd.

I could hear Rob crying from behind the door, my crying came from the bathroom because I couldn't cry next to him. You don't deserve to be in such a situation, I without any religion decided to appeal to those who call God.

⎯I've never talked to you and I don't know how to say it, but my son doesn't deserve what is happening to him is not fair to that child. He only has hours to live, let my son live⎯I try to complete without embarrassing my tears⎯He is a child, take me in his place. I've lived a lot in this life, I've never given any problems so help me with it now. You help those who ask right?, because then, I'm in a bathroom asking you to help me.

I didn't know if anything would help you Harry, but I asked Him a lot. You're such a sweet child why you leave now? I don't want you to go We need you so much.

That same night I dreamed that you were fine but I cried when I saw that it was just another illusion.

20 hours after delivery .

I could feel his father's gaze on us behind the glass, he'd been there for almost a whole day and I knew he wouldn't know.

⎯Harry, did you know that I fell in love with your father when I was very little, I saw him playing and I thought he was a prince and he thought I was a princess. When you grow up you will see that love is the most beautiful weapon in the world, it destroys all insecurities and everything you can imagine⎯I tell him⎯I took care of your father, who took care of me when you were inside⎯me I get up and get close to him⎯ He's beautiful, like his father.

You are so beautiful Harry that the angels are jealous of your greatest purity, you slept even smiling and breathed it for me, of everything it was the greatest.

⎯Come⎯Weary Robert sneaks by my bedside and joins me⎯No need to stay awake, he'll stay here with us.

I saw my father cry like a lost child of the mother, he was hurt and much more I was more if I came to the world I came with a mission to help. He would be fine to take care of me and he would be fine for you, entirely for you Harry.

27 hours after giving birth.

By strumming the sweet melody of the guitar, the little dances around the room, the fun extended and made for you. It made my best 7 hours of my life, being able to feel several sensations and feelings I always wanted. I gave you your first milk and you took it touching my heart, I was your mother Harry for 27 hours and it was the best.

With the little happiness I have left, I ask you today Harry:

-When will I see you again?

And with the same smile you left, and the same pure and sweet look you answer me:

-I will always be in your heart and I will be your private crowd in that big heart of yours.

With your eyes pure and bright you give me one last breath and say goodbye to me and your daddy. I love you so much Harry, even little.

⎯Date of death, June 26 at 8:00⎯Marcos announces with revolt⎯Little Harry.

With the tears I shed now of sadness, they were once of joy, the feeling won't pass but it will only grow. I love you so much son, wait for mom to arrive soon.

I love you, my little and eternal crowd. See you later son, thank you for putting up with so much and I want to say that no love is greater than I have for you.

With immense sadness I give you away and let myself die in your father's arms.

⎯Goodbye son⎯I speak

It was not unexpected that nothing would happen to little Harry, a baby under 6 months old to come into the world and survive is an almost miracle. These are the risks of something happening and someone needed to leave to show that love doesn't always save, I'm sure that in this world Harry would be the happiest child in the world. Having an actor and storyteller father and his mother the creator of his stories, imagine him with that smile and small body telling his classmates how he felt to have the two most precious dads in the world.

Then he came into the world on June 25th almost a month before his mother turned 33, weighing less than 2 kilos and measuring about 28.4 cm. He had everything to live and to be strong.

His skin was so fragile and almost transparent with his veins and nerves apparent, he had Robert's face, his mother's gaze one of the last 7 times he'd seen her. Harry Thomas Arantes Pattinson is the most beautiful little angel that ever set foot on this earth but today he meets his creator, but his parents know that regardless of everything. He, Harry, looks at them the same day he left. Smiling and next to their dear daddies.

⎯Robert⎯Marcos calls him out with his son

P.o.v Robert Pattinson

When I saw him born I realized and saw two things, that my partner was the strongest woman in the whole world and that my son was the miracle. Until Marcos directs a sad and lifeless look at me.

Seeing Y/n unconscious in my arms made me even more nervous, until Marcos leaves with my son in his arms and the nurse helps Y/n with the procedures.

⎯Do you know what he can do?⎯I ask helping her

⎯Procedure inducing life for him⎯she responds by applying sedatives to Y/n

⎯You were too strong⎯I tell her kissing her forehead⎯I'll be right back.

I go to the huge room we prepared for something to happen, with cleaning, hospital supplies, everything so that Harry doesn't get any bacteria or fungus out. His lungs were still too weak for him to be able to breathe just using it. And a ward for mother and son to be together

⎯Put on the clothes⎯Marcos says inside the room until I put on the clothes

⎯How is he? I need to see him⎯I reply entering

⎯Harry Thomas Arantes Pattinson, June 25th at 4:57 am⎯he answers dry⎯Weighing 1,659 kg with 28.4 centimeters.

⎯Hey big boy⎯I approach the incubator induced there I see him so small and fragile, the true face of an angel⎯You know who's talking,your daddy⎯I whisper looking at him breathing low with his body splendor

⎯He doesn't last long⎯the voice says to me⎯Enjoy him, he won't make it.

9 hours after delivery.

Telling my parents about Marcos' chart was the worst thing for me, and I still knew that it wasn't just them that I would have to tell, but my partner. You're an actor Rob, think.

⎯He looks so much like you⎯Y/n says proud of herself with the little one on her lap

⎯Y/n.... ⎯calling her with just her name is something very important

⎯Please, I beg you....⎯she cries making my heart ache⎯Leave me with him, he is a healthy and strong baby.

⎯Y/n.....⎯down on your side of the bed⎯Marcos said it's normal to happen.

⎯Fuck Rob, normal?⎯she says terrified⎯He's a baby.

⎯ I know my love ⎯ Wipe your tears leaving your face red ⎯ He's our baby and always will be, but it's the facts...

⎯I don't want to lose our son Robert, I don't want to⎯she cried beside me.

I've done so much for you, you need to stay here with both of us. You need to be strong Harry, you can't have any weaknesses and you can do it. I believe in your potential boy, your father believes in you and no matter what, I will always believe in you.

14 hours after giving birth.

Harry looking at you and your mother depending on each one kills me, her mother is the most affectionate and precious person for me, she saved me and I need to save her. I also need to save you, I would trade everything to be in her place and to see you safe and well.

⎯How are you?⎯ your grandfather's voice echoed to me

⎯Er....⎯my heart tugs and I start to collapse on the floor crying⎯I didn't protect her!

⎯Rob⎯he says in the same tone as his daughter hugging me⎯Don't do that.

⎯If I had helped her none of this shit would be happening!⎯I say angrily to myself

⎯ LOOK AT ME BOY!⎯ he yells⎯ None of this is any of you three's fault, please don't do this to you boy. Harry is our miracle now.

⎯ I'm sorry.....

20 hours after giving birth.

⎯He's so handsome⎯Y/n says looking at him from the outside and smiling⎯He pulled his father.

⎯Harry, you are your mother's masterpiece⎯I reply looking into her eyes red from crying and hugging her

⎯I'll never forgive myself if something happens to him Rob, he's just a baby and he hasn't even lived right⎯she whimpers in the

my ear with all your pain

⎯ He will live, I promise.

That's the only promise I'll keep forever, I'll have you as my soon. Let's be happy together me, you and your mother.

⎯Son⎯the soft voice called me⎯Rest;you have been sitting in front of this room for a day, you need to rest.

⎯If I rest something might happen, it's not the first time I'm going to do this⎯I reply looking at him through the glass

⎯He wanted you to rest⎯she says

⎯But I don't want to rest in this shit because my son is there, in that damn breathing machine⎯I reply thickly

⎯Ok⎯she leaves and I see my partner call me after Marcos enters

⎯Robert, enjoy.

⎯ no my son, please don't my son⎯ Y/n was crying in pain with her son in her arms⎯ god damn my son!

⎯Sorry⎯Marcos says and I take my guitar

And it was like this in the strum of the guitar, composing the song to the angels that you told me it was in thought:

-Never again, Harry?

With the simplest and purest look, you answer me:

-No daddy, it's forever.

I knew your time would come but not now, but it was the most important hours of my life. Seeing your mother giving a small smile after so much struggle and pain, hearing your grandparents by the side of the glass be happy after so much worry and weakness. Dance with you on my lap, feel your little heart beat in my chest, look at your little features and look at your pure gaze. You are my life until you're gone someday.

27 hours after giving birth.

With my last song, you look at us with your greatest strength and give us a small smile until a small tear forms. See you later Harry, see you my little piece of heaven.

⎯Date of death, June 26 at 8:00, little Harry⎯Marcos announces

⎯My little angel⎯Y/n says feeling all the pain and suffering for losing our son

With the look you came into the world with Harry, it was the look you left. Don't forget about me, daddy will never forget you. Even more my little cro

wd.

⎯MOTHER!⎯Robert yells from the bedroom door bringing everyone to the bedroom⎯Calm down, everything will be fine.

⎯It's early Rob, he's only 6 months old today⎯I speak nervously⎯I don't want to lose our son please.

I know 6 months he was still almost graduated but it was the most confusing and amazing 6 months of my life. It was the 6 months that I respected myself and took care of myself completely, they helped me to become the strongest woman possible and I know that this was all because I am having my son.

It wasn't just sex but my love developed into a child, I no longer knew what you were Harry but I already loved you.

You are my reason now, you are the reason for my heaven Harry and I will try everything to have you in my arms.

I remember when I wrote you a letter.

Flashback on

⎯Now I wanted to say to you dads of the year⎯Zoe said announcing everyone

We were in a small meeting, like a revelation tea only different maybe, because we already knew it was a boy.

⎯This letter is a letter made by many mothers, like me⎯Clare says

Dear mom and dad, today I turn 4 and a half months old my grandma said it's almost 5. Yes, I can already hear you. I love Dad's voice when he talks to me about the movies, I'm glad to be the son of such a fun father. My mom is the most beautiful mom in the world, and for you mom I want to say: Mom, in a few months I'll be in your little arms, I'll be your private crowd. The lady will fill me with kisses, affection and will look at me with her perfect gaze.

I hear his sweet voice talking to me, I'm learning to give little kicks but for you to know I'm here.

You may be crying now, but this cry is for joy.

I'm dying to see my daddies, and say that we love them even from here.

Daddy show every day that you love mommy and mommy I love you so much.

Love, your little Harry.

⎯So Y/n and Robert, know that inside is the fruit of their love⎯Clare speaks emotionally

Flashback off

Now the moment is of pain and suffering, we prefer a natural and home birth because I wanted to bring our child to the world with the strength that all women have.

No contraction is as strong as my desire to have you in my arms, no pain is the anguish I feel for having you so fragile and premature.

⎯ The water broke, see ⎯ Marcos says warning ⎯ The baby's heart is good and everything will be fine.

⎯I don't want to lose him⎯I say trying to have the strength not to think the worst

⎯We will bring this child alive, everything will be fine, I promise⎯he says helping me up

Every pain I feel in my life doesn't compare to this one, you were coming into the world and always giving me new sensations. You would be a fresh start for everyone and even Rob, we would have our first child and our first life together.

My head was heavy with weakness, my heart was beating fast, my moans that were once of pleasure are now of pain. I was bringing my son to life, a life that I had generated.

⎯I love you⎯Rob says at the moment⎯Let's make it right.

Rob, we made it work for 27 years. 27 years of living together with passionate lovers.

⎯You're going to sit in front of him and we're going to start dilating that lap⎯Marcos says adjusting me in the bathtub between Rob's legs⎯Only the father can stay here, I ask everyone to leave.

Everyone gave us strength and hope, the three of us need faith now. Nothing else is important now just Harry.

⎯I'll do the touch on you⎯Marcos starts the procedure inducing labor

⎯Look at me⎯Rob asks and I look at him⎯You are so enough, so important to me. You are my life now, I love you so much. If I could be in your place I would bring him to you.

⎯That's good, your cervix is ​​dilating⎯Marcos says optimistically⎯Just a few more contractions and he'll dilate completely and he'll be with his son in his arms.

Pain pulsed through me, my whole body was aching, I could go to hell and back in a matter of seconds. It was early and too much for him to come but it was time to find his way.

⎯You're doing so well, you're strong⎯Rob spends time saying how much I can do this in my ear

⎯Let's snuggle this baby in place⎯Marcos warns and I scream with the contraction coming⎯That scream, come on girl!

⎯ IT HURTS A LOT!⎯ I scream feeling all the pain and screaming even more

You're on your way son, my little private crowd.....

⎯Fully dilating⎯he looks at me⎯And now, let's go Y/n you can do it!

⎯Come on baby, come on⎯Rob says

What remains for me is to push so hard until I hear your cry. Pushing until I see you got here, feeling you slip into my body, and feeling every total pain for you to come makes me feel totally strong.

⎯His head⎯Marcos announces and I keep pushing screaming

⎯You can do it⎯my companion's whisper makes me feel my strength come until my eyes rest

⎯Little Harry⎯Marcos says and I hear Rob's chest get drunk from crying⎯You did it!

I heard your little cry for the first time, I glanced at you dizzily. Her fragile and almost transparent skin, her veins showing, her small bones and her look so mine.

⎯Oh my dear, it's okay⎯Clare says smoothing her hands on my back⎯It's okay.

⎯ Y/n, nothing will happen. It's going to be all right we know⎯my mom says sitting me down and I trying not to cry

⎯I'm tired don't they realize I'm pregnant and I'm human?!

6 months pregnant and here we are, I can say that now I feel like crap, I look like a shaggy ball and my beauty is gone but not for that. When you become a girlfriend of someone famous, the charges come, Robert and I are in a phase of trying to enjoy this whole pregnancy and after the news that this pregnancy is risky, all that has changed.

His "fans" haven't accepted that he has a concrete relationship with someone, he's still his exes but they don't realize the pressure I have. I stopped writing to focus entirely on Harry, our baby isn't even born and is already being slaughtered in nets.

My name is being used for a lot of horrible things, I'm being cursed with filthy and terrible things and that's for everything, for just loving and having a family. I wanted to teach and learn a lot from the world but I'm not perfect.

Robert and I are in an anxiety crisis together, he helps me with some chores but if I think about it I'll see him go away and soon.

⎯Half of these people don't know the harm it does to you, sowing hate is not cool⎯Clare says beside me⎯You are so precious to him, and so is this baby. If he loses one of you two, I don't know what he can do.

⎯If your son hadn't had anything to do with her none of this would have happened⎯my mom tells Clare⎯We're not from this world Clare, you guys carry the big Hollywood name and we carry a simple family name.

⎯Mother please⎯I beg her trying to stay calm

⎯Please Y/n?⎯she gets up⎯Do you ever hear what these fans say about you? That you're a bitch, slut, opportunist and worse!

⎯But I'm not!⎯I answer calmly

⎯They say that and everyone believes it, I didn't raise you like this Y/n and I honestly don't think you deserve it⎯she says⎯Change your life for a man, move house and country, try your dreams and fail!

⎯Don't talk to her like that!⎯Clare gets up

⎯I tell the truth!⎯she screams at me⎯Can't you see he's not yours?,he'll always be someone else's and never your husband,do you think that's how life is?⎯I look at her⎯Life It's not just finding a rich man and having sex with him.

⎯Please let's stop this⎯I stand up supported

⎯Like it was with my father?, all those memories and promises of love you made to him were in vain!?⎯I approach her⎯Was it his money?, I'm sorry mom but I don't think about money because I already I have mine!

⎯You're not from this world Y/n.

⎯Tell me what I did to you to make you hate me so much!?⎯the weak eye⎯WHAT THE FUCK DID I DO FOR YOU TO TREAT ME LIKE THAT FOR NOTHING!?I AM NOT WHAT I WANTED!?

⎯Y/n calm down⎯Clare asks pushing me away

⎯ SPEAK! ⎯ I scream in my bitter voice ⎯ HOW BAD I DID TO YOU!

⎯YOU WERE BORN!⎯ she replies coldly

⎯You are a bad mother⎯my face burns with the slap until I look into her eyes now scared

⎯ENOUGH!⎯Clare says⎯Get out of here Mistress Arantes!

⎯Y/n I'm sorry...⎯ she whispers

⎯Get out of here Mistress Arantes!⎯Clare she exclaims and I turn away hearing the door close⎯Darling....

⎯Clare....⎯Frightened whisper⎯Leave me alone...

She knew that even if she sat down she wouldn't answer her, even after all I felt even weaker. I'm not the "person" who knows about feelings but knows she's felt them someday, who also killed her once, that day "My girl" was gone.

Having an unwanted pregnancy is like that, after they grow up they will feel both mistakes. Society needs to learn not to play with the feelings of others and even more of those we love the most.

A campaign on how not to get involved with those butterflies in your stomach, tremendous illusions and out of reality.

My feeling goes away every time I think of him as a good thing, sometimes it's my fault but who asked to be born?.

Do humans really think we wanted to leave our protections and warm placentas to come into the world?, ask the homeless person how their Christmas was or an orphan how their parents died. There are thousands of reasons to try and billions to give up.

But what the fuck "her life is beautiful", yes she is beautiful, when I make her and now I want to give it up.

Enough of being and enduring silence listening to the world scream and you in silence, life is not beautiful but illusory because everything in it is fleeting and EVERYONE, I say, EVERYONE knows.

I breathe trying to keep control of the hot breath and no air coming out of me, crises are part of me all my life and they are the ones that are with me now. Where is the happiness that this "God" promised us?, was it a lie or "God has his favorites" is it right?.

The rain continues outside and my heart keeps beating even after my thought command says "stop".

⎯Harry, you will walk in such a horrible world⎯cry⎯You will have to be so strong.

My head starts to feel heavy and my lap starts to burn, I get up and take one of the thousands of developmental meds for Harry. If his father were here but he's too busy with his work.

⎯When you are born, I promise to protect you until the end of the world⎯I continue⎯Or your father can help me, I miss your father.

Not that anything happened to Robert or that I'm someone in love but I need him with me, I quit my job and he can't. People forget the least that they are HUMAN, Robert is a machine for society and a puppet for some. He can never have his family or anyone else.

⎯Love...are you awake?⎯I feel the scent and heat of your body next to mine

⎯ It took

⎯Didn't see it get closer to you⎯he says and I turn to him⎯Your mother didn't want to tell you that,okay

⎯ I'm not enough, it happens⎯ I snuggle next to you

⎯You are more than enough⎯ he whispers in my ear giving me a little hope

⎯We miss you⎯I take a deep breath placing his hand on my belly⎯He likes to hear his voice.

⎯Hey Harry, daddy loves you son⎯he says caressing⎯You are my lives now⎯he says kissing my forehead

⎯You wear it⎯I mean the infinity ring I gave him when I was pregnant⎯I thought I would take it off.

⎯It's a gift from the most important person to me⎯he smiles

⎯And who would it be?⎯I mock

⎯Oh, it's a secret but she's my favorite person⎯he looks at me⎯Do you think Harry would mind if I kissed his mother?

⎯I think he would tell you to go ahead⎯two smiles and a passionate kiss

Sensation of our lips together, our bodies together and the two of us together.

Until I felt something burning in my lap, letting out a loud groan.

⎯What is it?⎯ he looks at me worried

⎯ I think my water broke ⎯ I say looking at my part in the wet bed

⎯You really seem to like him⎯Marcela says disassembling her suitcase

⎯Er, time really works miracles⎯I reply awkwardly⎯Robert is a very special person to me, and now we're going to be three.

⎯Romantic and shy like her father⎯she says looking at me⎯You know I like you very much as if you were my daughter, if you want to say anything, don't hesitate to tell me.

⎯I wish it were like that with my mother⎯I sigh and Marcela hugs me⎯I think she doesn't like being my mother.

⎯ Oh my dear, your mother likes you so much but she is camouflaged, in her heart there's only one little person called Y/n Arantes.

⎯Good⎯out of the hug⎯I need to buy some things for the baby and prepare one where extra exams.

⎯ Why so much concern? ⎯ she looks at me worried

⎯For about 3 days I've been having mild cramping and sometimes I've seen a reddish discharge⎯I explain⎯Marcos and my gynecologist said it's normal and nothing to worry about.

⎯Son of Fatima, take care of him. His mother was expelled from the village a while ago for stalking⎯ she insists until we hear knocks at the door

⎯Sorry, can I come in?⎯Rob says behind the door, there's a big difference between him and Marcos⎯Let's have lunch with your father, hello Marcela.

⎯Love, I had forgotten I was entertained with gossip from Brazil⎯kiss her lips quickly⎯Marcela see you later, enjoy the house and condo. Robert is exaggerated for buying this house.

⎯Our home, of the two of us and our beautiful baby⎯crouch in the form of length kisses the softness of my belly

⎯Go if you don't want to be late⎯Marcela says

The way to the Brazilian food restaurant, as a huge craving hit, was fun. We listen to a lot of music, such as MPB, sofrencia and even funk that Rob has been interested in lately. We were lucky the paparazzi were busy with the president walking through the streets of Los Angeles, kind of random.

Robert warned me that he would have a quick job in the UK, he would have to go to one of the meetings for his new project, The Batman, which continues to break records.

I am very proud of my partner.

⎯Should I be angry with your father again?

⎯We saw him last year, he hasn't changed a thing⎯I reply by entering the place⎯Dad!

⎯Daughter⎯he gives me a tight hug, something he had promised me for years⎯Robert⎯he greets him sitting in front of us

⎯Please, no formalities. You've known Rob for a long time⎯I exclaim in "good"

⎯But before he didn't get my daughter pregnant⎯he looks at Rob⎯Let's go to some necessary questions.

⎯ Father!

⎯I can handle it, love⎯ he puts his hand on my thigh

⎯What are the intentions with my daughter?⎯he says the obvious

⎯Only the best and certainly the naughtiest⎯ he says

⎯How are you going to deal with the pressure on my daughter after delivery,you are a highly sought after artist,would you leave my daughter alone postpartum?,And in this modern world,can you handle being a father?⎯even I wait for the Rob's answer

⎯ I want to make your daughter the happiest woman in the world, even if I have to stop everything. I love her every day I look into her eyes, I've organized my entire 6 years⎯he replies⎯I'll be with her in childbirth, postpartum and for all the years.

⎯Thank you my love⎯I reply placing my hand over yours

⎯Boyfriends?⎯ he asks

⎯For now, I'll be able to call you Mrs. Pattinson soon⎯ escapes a smile from my father

⎯Well, if so⎯my father sighs⎯May my grandson come with good health and may you two be very happy.

⎯Sorry⎯wipe the fallen tears

⎯ That makes my princess very happy and if something happens to her, well I'll be arrested for killing Robert Pattinson⎯ he's serious

⎯I need to go to the bathroom and dad behave!.

I feel something moving inside me, is this my baby's first stunt. A burning pain starts in my lap, I take a deep breath trying not to delirious with the pain.

I enter one of the stalls and sit on the toilet, lowering my skirt, I look at my underwear with the reddish discharge almost like blood.

My body starts to shake with my emotional instincts, I take a deep breath shifting my calm state.

I go back to the table seeing food already laid out.

⎯You took a while, is everything ok?⎯Rob asked me

⎯Boosts were busy⎯I answer anything trying to get away from the subject until I hear a scream

⎯ROBERT PATTINSON!?⎯thank that person for yelling⎯Can you take a picture with me?!I'm SUPER your fan!

⎯Oh sure⎯he takes a picture with the girl and turns to me

⎯I've seen you since Twilight, your romance with Kristen, with FKA, and now with Suki. Wow, Robert you're a catcher!⎯ she says

⎯I'm not with Suki, I'm with my partner Y/n⎯she looks at me and gives him a hug and leaves

⎯Is this our routine now?⎯my father asks in our language

⎯It's his routine⎯I reply confirming⎯Relationship with Suki, it seems that even though you say it and I'm pregnant.You'll always be your ex⎯I phallus and he stays quiet embarrassed

And so was our lunch, lots of fans harassing us or something. Some being polite and taking pictures with me and even with my dad, now being in a park taking a little walk to show my dad the real USA.

Rob holds my hand in public, he likes to have fun in public minus the part that is invaded by photographers. And yet another fan with a child comes to us.

⎯I'm going to buy an ice cream⎯my dad says leaving us alone

⎯Good afternoon Robert and Y/n, could you take a picture with my son because he is a big fan of Harry Potter⎯she explains and I lower myself to the child dressed in the Hufflepuff cloak

⎯Who is this little guy fighting?⎯I see his name written on his shirt⎯Well Harry, I knew that this big man here is my boyfriend.

⎯I thought Cedric was killed⎯he says innocently as I laugh⎯Is there a watermelon in his belly?

⎯Well I think Cedric had a proposal and went back to earth, now he's going to have a family⎯I reply and the child smiles and Rob picks him up

⎯Let's take a picture little Harry Hufflepuff⎯he laughs and turns to his mother

⎯Thanks a lot Robert and Y/n⎯he thanks us with a kiss on our cheeks saying goodbye and leaving

⎯He knew how to choose the right house⎯Rob says