One day at a time

You would think having struggled my whole life I would get better at it

I've done very little studying this week. I did however watch Off campus and fell into a fan edits rabbit hole.

📖The Intruder by Freida Mcfadden

200 books read!! I have read more but since I started recording 3 years ago I've reached a nice number.

Currently I am sharply focused on collecting the cutest pastries on the Forest app. I have never locked in this hard.

Finally met the sea after a long time. And painted a poorly defined dolphin.

📖 Phantom of the Opera - I regret not reading this incredible and jarringly strange book earlier.

This week has taken it out of me.

A pretty bad week. Things have spiralled; and by things I mean my mind and all the thoughts that encompass it. I find myself at a loss of novelty that makes everyday feel separate from others. The same routine over and over is making me sick. I crave something spontaneous and new and unexpected. Tragically, I'm responsible for creating it.

With respect to work, sometimes I find it so difficult staying on task paralysed by the fear of being on the wrong track. I know that all effort is worthwhile but, is it towards the right goal?

Did not die

Woke up earlier than ever.

Dreamt a lot and did just as much.

⏳ 8.5 h

Goodnotes has deleted random sections of a few of my notes and I am paranoid now to the point of constantly re-checking every single folder repeatedly. God what a mess.

A newly discovered access to a resource I should have known for a long time but anyway, we're here now.

I've been feeling behind lately as the exam date approaches and the fear of failure looms over me. I must overcome this, not give up. It has become a silent testament to my will and grit; I must defend it.

Week 15

I have nothing to say except,

Week 14

The new leaves of spring in the morning sunlight are my reason to live this week. Almost iridescent in their naive, hopeful colour. It feels like a blessing that such beauty is available freely for all to see. Even as the world crumbles slowly around us, even in the worst of times, life goes on.

New endings and new beginnings.

⏳8:46 h

☕ My best friend's parents invited me for dinner with them (friend lives away from home). It was a strange experience and yet, not that out of pocket. They have seen me grow up and go through school and college and they are almost my parents at this point.