GO AWAY (◡‿◡✿)

if we make it through december and january and february and then march and april as well and may and june and july also and august and september. we’ll be fine

My deepest darkest fantasy is that I collapse on the street and I am rushed to the hospital. They perform a bunch of tests and find out I am severely deficient in some kind of vitamin. Then I start taking the vitamin and I become the happiest cleverest person alive because all my problems were caused by this one deficiency

Moreover, everyone gathers around to be tremulously compassionate and discreetly admiring: all this time, you lacked the Vitamin? And yet you persevered?

‘dont say gay if youre bi’ lmao lets all leave the house! lets all go outside and get a big gulp of fresh air is what im thinking

I love when men wear tiny lil slutty shorts. good job

Im not religious and wasnt raised as such until its time to say something unhinged at which point I become VERY catholic all the sudden

No atheistic sentence carries the same meaning as "god made me wrong on purpose"

im at your girls house changing their pronouns

this is what the killers song is about

centigrade sounds like an insect whose legs you're counting. celsius sounds like an ancient sea god. fahrenheit is what german people say after they sneeze, i think. and kelvin? i think i know him, didn't he just break his arm at the skate park