Hunter of hearts

I CAN'T BEAR IT ANYMORE! I can't... These TRASH HEARTBEATS. They are TOO STRONG, TOO LOUD... I can't fall asleep... I keep hearing them, every single moment. Drugs didn't make it. GOD DAMMIT! Why won't you go SILENT?! Just... STOP! Stop doing this! That's it. My OWN HEART left me no other choice. I need to teach it a lesson. If it does not want to rest, I will put it to rest. Forcefully. Inch by inch... So that I can finally rest. Now that my lungs are filled, I can see it, every single beat, right under my sternum. I can see it... My little pump, my little core, that little mass inside me. It's really, REALLY trying its BEST to show me its beats, to show me how BEAUTIFUL they are, to CONVINCE me they are worth feeling and hearing. But it isn't enough. While my little one trashes DESPERATELY inside me begging for forgiveness, I wonder... How DEEP should I plunge it to reach each one of its chambers, one by one? Apex to Right Ventricle (RV), then to Left Ventricle (LV)? Should I go straight into it? Should I go straight into the LV? Would you go one by one or straight into my little pump's? Here it comes, little one. Just... STOP.

-√\_-√\_-√\_-√\_-√\_-√\_-√\_-√\____-√\____-√\____-√\____-√\____-√\____-√\________-√\________-√\________ -√\________________-√\________________________________-√\____________________________________________________________________________________

.

.

.

This is a real, very old syringe made of glass and metal. I love it -- just think how far it could penetrate my chest. You could so easily slip the sharp tip through the muscle between my ribs, pierce my pericardium, and find my heart. So fast I don't have time to react before you've injected a lethal substance into my left ventricle... Or better yet, slow and deliberate, with me conscious but restrained. Watching the slender needle slide further and further into me, feeling the frantic beating of my heart and the exquisite pain as it catches briefly on the pericardial sac before penetrating the pounding heart muscle itself.