What’s the most ridiculous false rumor that has been spread about you?

I joined my wife’s workplace about 12 months after she joined. When we worked together (same department, same roles), we’d keep mostly away from each other so not to crowd each other. When we’d take breaks, we’d be hanging out together. You know, normal stuff. Thing is, no one picked up on the fact that we were husband and wife. They knew she was married, and that I was married - but not to each other. Someone saw us holding hands on the walk back to our car after work, someone else saw us kiss when I dropped her in to work when I had the day off, and rumours started flying around that we were cheating on our significant others. People took it upon themselves to ‘intervene’ and approached me to tell me she was married and that I should be ashamed of myself. Someone else made a comment to her that she should be more discreet if she was going to continue on her relationship with me. Truth be told, we both found it pretty fucking funny. Didn’t get a chance to run with it, because we were so taken aback by it when it was brought up to us individually, that we just blurted out the truth on the spot.

imagine ur otp

college professor: i’m rejecting your evolutionary biology thesis me: wtf why dude college professor: you added “(lmao)” every time you mentioned the species Homo Erectus

This is one of the rarest species of African cats, but most people don’t even know it exists.

!!!! HOLY SHIT THINK OF WHAT THIS CAN DO FOR ENDANGERED SPECIES THROUGHOUT THE WORLD! especially ones who can’t handle captivity or have weird gestation periods that can’t be replicated in captivity

shoutout to people with simultaneously great and terrible memories. like oh yeah i remember in perfect detail that random story you told about the banana costume from a year ago but all of novemeber? completely blank.

why is this making me laugh so fucking hard

He committed to how pissed off he was