Cerisier de la Lune

Although i do know i don’t have anyone that will answer this, i thought i wanted to vent out a thought i had when i woke up today:

Why is it that your dreams at time portrait scenes that were non-existent or that involve people you no longer feel anything about?

Know that nagging cozy feeling of friendship that your mind knows it’s not true but in your dream it creates a strange illusion of peace and friendliness that is no longer there. Routines that you have in real life that for a reason or the other your brain decides to input people that are so so off your life but it seems normal in your unconscious state. I confess i woke up a bit annoyed with myself because i feel happy with the friends and little things i achieved, while my unconscious self feels the need to add something more? No dear, i do not miss my previous companions nor i miss situations like High School (ugh, no seriously, who the hell misses school anyway?) nor i miss the older part of me that was so afraid of everything and so confused (i still am, but i’m not as afraid nor i am as alone as i used to be) 

I’m glad of who i became to be, knowing that i might be mentally ill like so many folks out there but that unlike what i thought in high school, i’m not mad, i’m a result of circunstances that weren’t the best and yet, i have the ones i love where i want them to be (except...mom but...At times we gotta resign to certain things...) and that is next to me, in my heart, in my mind and even far, they do know i love them.