Lunaria Sky

My characters are human. Complex. They have no "characterization". They're complex. They act like a human would.

There was a full year after Douxie became immortal where he ate nothing but toothpaste, just to see what would happen.

Did he only eat one brand?

but then douxie dies, and everything changes. there’s no build up, no slow motion giving in, it’s just that douxie is dead and now there must be something to beg. something has to be responsible and it can’t be me. something has to have enough power to bring him back. katie doesn’t make an active choice, but before she knows it she’s begging and crying and praying and becoming her father’s daughter in a way that nine hundred years of leaving never quite did to her.

douxie dies and katie is suddenly and horribly reminded of all those stories her mother told her about jesus on the cross, dying for the sins of the world. she never believed those stories - why would anyone choose to die to save a world like this? she certainly wouldn’t. but then douxie chooses to go back for the people he cares for even though he knows what’s coming, and he dies for that. and katie realizes that, despite how much she hates to admit it, maybe all those stories weren’t so wrong. after all, both douxie and jesus died innocent men, trying to save the world they loved. and it pains katie to her core to think that way, because of how long she spent resisting god, but all of a sudden douxie is dead and even an uncaring, unflinching universe isn’t capable of this.

Pretty sure no one cares, but...

Trigger Warning: Brief description of birth, mention of heart complications in a child under 1 year, death, and parental abuse

I has a dream in 2023, September 19th. I was at school, having a normal day, despite severe cramping in my stomach. Eventually, during my history class, the pain got so bad that I was writhing on the ground. Someone called who I thought was my mother– it was not in fact my mother, it was Hisirdoux Casperan (In the dream, it's fuzzy who it is, but I vividly recall his vibrant hazel amber looking at me from a pale tan face with black hair. And who could mistake that voice?)– and suddenly I'm in a car heading home, Douxie gently holding my hand and whispering reassurance as we drive.

We park in the driveway and BAM, my water breaks. I panic, because prior to this, I was a virgin and also hadn't known I was pregnant.

Next thing I know, I'm in a hospital bed, Douxie's low voice comforting me and whispering things like, 'good job, I'm proud of you' and 'You're almost there'. So I'm laying there, mind fuzzed out by pure agony that wrenches through my whole stomach and pelvis, and suddenly it's over, and there's a small bundle of life on my chest. She's 5 pounds even, and about 15 inches long. And her screaming is music to my ears.

I only very vaguely remember this, but the doctors told us that she was a month early, and [thanks a lot Douxie] her twin is healthy, but still growing. [Separate amniotic sacs and separate placentas, my dream was very specific on that.]

Well, like an hour later, I'm holding my daughter– Amily Rose Casperan-Hansen– Douxie in the chair next to me, and my mom walks in. Instantly, I panic. Not in an, 'oh no, what is she going to think' way, no... My immediate reaction is to try to shield my daughter, because I'm afraid my mother is going to take her and I'm never going to see her again.

Then I wake up.

About a month later, October 14 2023, I have a second dream. I and Douxie are home in a cozy house, small and compact, but perfect for our tiny family. I'm nursing Amily, and my water breaks. Well, unfortunately, we don't even make it past the bedroom door when Amily's twin starts to come out, so I end up crouched next to the bed, and give birth there.

A baby boy. No idea how heavy or how long, but I'm gonna guess about 8 pounds and 20 inches. So, not as small as his sister. His name is Alastor Thorne Casperan-Hansen.

After that, I have sporadic dreams, spending time with the twins and Douxie, and then- February 6, 2026, I'm back in that same hospital that Amily was born in, scared and sore, in labor again.

Another girl. Two months premature this time. I was bleeding out during the time they said her weight and length, so I can't tell you that. Her name? Elodia Melody Casperan-Hansen.

Well, I woke up after that thinking, okay, surely that's the end of it, right?

NOPE.

March 6, 2026, I fall asleep, and I'm spending an evening with my now two year old twins while Douxie works on putting Elodia down, when suddenly I hear him shout with panic.

Her heart had stopped.

We start CPR, and I honestly don't remember much after that until my baby girl was in the NICU fighting for her life, with doctors telling me she's fine because she's alive now, so surely her heart just stopped for no reason.

For the next two weeks, I dream of being in that NICU, knowing there is something very wrong with my daughter, and no doctors are willing to hear it.

March 20, 2026, 11:59pm her heart stops again. I stand there, watching my baby turn blue, hearing her flatline. It was terrifying... but I'm glad that it happened, because then doctors started running tests. It was some heart condition, they wouldn't tell us what.

So, she gets put on a transplant list.

Miraculously, she gets moved to the front of the line, and gets her new heart on the 31 of March.

It's a lot... but I just needed to get it out there.

Pretty sure no one cares, but...

Trigger Warning: Brief description of birth, mention of heart complications in a child under 1 year, death, and parental abuse

I has a dream in 2023, September 19th. I was at school, having a normal day, despite severe cramping in my stomach. Eventually, during my history class, the pain got so bad that I was writhing on the ground. Someone called who I thought was my mother– it was not in fact my mother, it was Hisirdoux Casperan (In the dream, it's fuzzy who it is, but I vividly recall his vibrant hazel amber looking at me from a pale tan face with black hair. And who could mistake that voice?)– and suddenly I'm in a car heading home, Douxie gently holding my hand and whispering reassurance as we drive.

We park in the driveway and BAM, my water breaks. I panic, because prior to this, I was a virgin and also hadn't known I was pregnant.

Next thing I know, I'm in a hospital bed, Douxie's low voice comforting me and whispering things like, 'good job, I'm proud of you' and 'You're almost there'. So I'm laying there, mind fuzzed out by pure agony that wrenches through my whole stomach and pelvis, and suddenly it's over, and there's a small bundle of life on my chest. She's 5 pounds even, and about 15 inches long. And her screaming is music to my ears.

I only very vaguely remember this, but the doctors told us that she was a month early, and [thanks a lot Douxie] her twin is healthy, but still growing. [Separate amniotic sacs and separate placentas, my dream was very specific on that.]

Well, like an hour later, I'm holding my daughter– Amily Rose Casperan-Hansen– Douxie in the chair next to me, and my mom walks in. Instantly, I panic. Not in an, 'oh no, what is she going to think' way, no... My immediate reaction is to try to shield my daughter, because I'm afraid my mother is going to take her and I'm never going to see her again.

Then I wake up.

About a month later, October 14 2023, I have a second dream. I and Douxie are home in a cozy house, small and compact, but perfect for our tiny family. I'm nursing Amily, and my water breaks. Well, unfortunately, we don't even make it past the bedroom door when Amily's twin starts to come out, so I end up crouched next to the bed, and give birth there.

A baby boy. No idea how heavy or how long, but I'm gonna guess about 8 pounds and 20 inches. So, not as small as his sister. His name is Alastor Thorne Casperan-Hansen.

After that, I have sporadic dreams, spending time with the twins and Douxie, and then- February 6, 2026, I'm back in that same hospital that Amily was born in, scared and sore, in labor again.

Another girl. Two months premature this time. I was bleeding out during the time they said her weight and length, so I can't tell you that. Her name? Elodia Melody Casperan-Hansen.

Well, I woke up after that thinking, okay, surely that's the end of it, right?

NOPE.

March 6, 2026, I fall asleep, and I'm spending an evening with my now two year old twins while Douxie works on putting Elodia down, when suddenly I hear him shout with panic.

Her heart had stopped.

We start CPR, and I honestly don't remember much after that until my baby girl was in the NICU fighting for her life, with doctors telling me she's fine because she's alive now, so surely her heart just stopped for no reason.

For the next two weeks, I dream of being in that NICU, knowing there is something very wrong with my daughter, and no doctors are willing to hear it.

March 20, 2026, 11:59pm her heart stops again. I stand there, watching my baby turn blue, hearing her flatline. It was terrifying... but I'm glad that it happened, because then doctors started running tests. It was some heart condition, they wouldn't tell us what.

So, she gets put on a transplant list.

Miraculously, she gets moved to the front of the line, and gets her new heart on the 31 of March.