𝒜ngelis

⚚ . . . lunaefreya's abode ! . . .⚚

00:00 . . . navigation !

lunaefreya's masterlist !! most recent post(s): --- academic diaries: sharing is NOT caring ! (not if it's with you) --- 22.7 (cissia x reader) nonchalant boyfriend creature --- 24.7 (caelus x reader) a photo only looks good if the muse is loved by the photographer --- 25.7 (harumasa x reader) [2] retail woes: nurse phainon saves the day ! --- 26.7 (phainon x reader)

00:00 . . . more about the author ! ♡

⤷ ♡ you can call me faye or lunaefreya ! ⤷ ♡ 18 yrs // she/her // enfp // ⤷ ♡ for additional info: my super duper cool carrd that totally isn't hugo themed... ⤷ ♡ i'm a novice writer who writes for both self-indulgence and for the joy of others! ⤷ ♡ i'm fairly new to this whole thing so expect the occasional mistakes :D ⤷ ♡ if you see me @ my bestie @nemoibemoi it's because she's lowkey the goat for helping me articulate my disorganized thoughts 😵‍💫literally the bestest idk what i'd do without her <3 do check out her stuff she has amazing writing like omg?!? if you love LOVE!!! long works, then please give her works a like or reblog!

00:00 . . . author's only socials --- feel free to interact ! ⤷ ♡ disc: lunaefreya

⤷ ♡ major fangirl of . . . hugo vlad, caelus, wise, severian ! ⤷ ♡ honorable mentions . . . seth, vivian, cissia, phainon, moze, blade, cipher, kamisato ayato, promeia, velina

00:00 . . . blog content --- what to expect !

⤷ ♡ this is a zzz centered blog, but I won't hesitate to write for hsr characters too c: (maybe i'll dabble in a bit of genshin as well). ⤷ ♡ my canon au knowledge for both hsr and genshin may be a bit outdated, so i'm more likely to write hsr/gi characters in modern au (literally anything else other than canon au) to make my life easier ! ⤷ ♡ I write for both male AND female characters, however this blog will primarily be focused on male characters :) ⤷ ♡ i write either romantic or platonic works ! ⤷ ♡ while i mainly post my works on here, expect me to reblog things i find cool or some yapping once in a while !

00:00 . . . i post . . .

⤷ ♡ oneshots, bulletpoint hcs, multiple character fics in one post (the zzz bug one is a perfect example), some drawings that i post once in a blue moon.

⤷ ♡ no nsfw --- i don't know how to write nsfw nor do i plan on learning, it's not my cup of tea and that's fine c: (suggestive stuff is fine!) ⤷ ♡ i tend to write fluff, angst, maybe angst no comfort, but i primarily write comedic things in general ! ⤷ ♡ reader will ALWAYS be gender neutral unless stated otherwise. i make sure reader's personality/quirks/physical attributes are neutral at best --- unless i state otherwise in my 'notes' section :)

00:00 . . . requests ! ---

⤷ ♡ i will fulfill any request that tickles the writing part of my brain !! and even if it does, depending on the status of my flow state, i may finish it earlier or later. (don't take it to heart!!) ⤷ ♡ please state in your request whether you want the fic/headcanon post to be romantic or platonic! ⤷ ♡ feel free to include multiple characters in one post! (referring to the format of this post in particular). ⤷ ♡ i may take a bit to complete requests simply because the pressure to do better than usual is a higher, but overall i get it done in due time :) ⤷ ♡ please do be patient with me !

00:00 . . . tags ! ---

#lunaefreya's fics --- fic posts #lunaefreya's headcanons --- headcanon posts #lunaefreya's completed requests --- where i complete one of YOUR requests ! #lunaefreya's doodles --- rare drawing posts #lunaefreya's yapping sessions --- i yap to my heart's content #lunaefreya's revisions --- where my old posts undergo a MUCH needed makeover

00:00 . . . credits ! ---

chiikawa dividers + sparkles ⤷ ♡ @princsglitter silly dessert divider ⤷ ♡ @suupersonic

I start university soon.

less than 6 weeks to be exact.

(is that the right usage of than?? is it then??? i think it's than but i don't feel like googling it bro fuck grammar rules 💔💔 bro my brain is too fried i've been writing drafts for hours 💔💔 ) i work like a bulldozer i fear... aka i am more than capable of working myself to the bone for HOURSSSS and DAYSSS without breaking a sweat but then i laze around for a good week🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏 that's how i survive s*hool 🙏🙏🙏 bless 🙏🙏 then the cycle repeats 🙏🙏🙏 but bro my HOBBIES💔💔💔💔💔 gonna have NO time for all of that 💔💔💔💔💔 those professors are going to slime me OUT 💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔 gonna use the remaining amount of free time I have for myself to play !!! i like to play !!! /ref i like to write !!!! i like to play !!! but anyways since the big and scary uni is nearing your hg has to be a scholar !! i cannot be a bum AND failing school 🙏 but i can be a bum AND be passing school 🤔

. . . synopsis: phainon plays overbearing nurse and takes care of sick co-worker!reader while on the clock . . . wc: 3.1k

. . . notes: might be ooc, phainon is the sweetest co-worker you’ll ever meet, reader actively dying from a cold, phainon gets a bit flustered by your candid sick induced words, phainon is a tad protective.

Working retail was awkward and exhausting.

Where Phainon stays behind the counter as a cashier, greeting customers with that contagious smile of his, scanning items while a stretched, awkward silence settles between him and the next university student with deep, dark eyebags. Who oftentimes, were less concerned about the small talk and more concerned about the cost of their third 12-pack energy drinks for the day, making Phainon always stare at his poor classmate with mild distraught.

If his manager wanted to switch it up a bit, Phainon’s left on stocking duty for the day. Stays at the far back of the humble gas station. Where he spends a handful of his shift gathering boxes, organizing them in a way that leaves his mind slightly fatigued. Where the shelves are his enemy and the dead rodent he finds at the back corner of the station is one of his many friends.

Whatever the case may be, he knows first hand how exhausting it is to work at a retail job, even if it was part-time. So to see you stand behind the counter where he thought it was going to be another boring day?

It was nothing more than relieving for him.

Phainon ushers himself behind the counter, bowing his head slightly to you as a show of mutual respect. “Oh— Hey partner!” He greets, his voice never lacking the amiable tone he rocks. To which you gave him a sluggish nod. He stands beside you, letting his eyes survey the interior of the gas station draped in the morning sun— desolate in terms of customers.

Perhaps he can get away with chatting with you on the job? There’s hardly any customers in the morning anyways… Surely he can squeeze some light-hearted chitchat?

“…Morning.” You manage to greet, barely. To that, Phainon’s smile seemed to dampen a tad. He can get behind everyone not being a morning person like him— always appreciative of the dawn seeping through the curtains, kissing his eyelids as a soothing morning ritual.

But today?

Your voice lacks its usual oomph, sounding scratchier than an old record player, almost grating with a sickness that’s hard to miss. Not to mention the flickering white light hanging above you, highlighting the pallidness overpowering the vibrancy your sickly skin lacks. To top it all off? You look like you’d rather be anywhere else but here.

And that? Seemed to exacerbate the harsh worry lines on both his brows and forehead.

He clears his throat behind his closed fist, hoping to draw your attention onto him instead of the front door. “(Name)? Uh… pardon my manners, don’t take it to heart but…” He bites his tongue, almost afraid to state the obvious— but what more could he do without sounding like a prick?? On one hand, he knows it’s none of his business, knows he shouldn’t pry where it isn't his place to do so.

But on the other hand? He couldn’t keep his mouth shut when he’s made aware of someone’s suffering! Especially if it’s clear as day! And most importantly…

If he’s more than capable of doing something about it.

Phainon sighs, choosing to say it how it is rather than trying to sugarcoat it to the best of his abilities. It’d be easier to understand him if he was straight to the point when your mind is currently muddled with sickness. You’re already suffering as is. “Perhaps you should take a break?? Or better yet…” He lowers his voice down to a whisper, as if spilling a secret. “Take the day off? You know I'm more than capable and happy to cover your shift for you right? I can talk with our manager and see if we can arrange—”

Unfortunately, his advice seems to go in one ear and out the other. Your eyes slowly widen at his seemingly wild suggestion, before you shake your head with the same sluggishness as a snail. “Can’t.” You say simply, as if already accepting your ‘fixed’ fate that can so easily be changed.

Phainon stammers. “What do you mean ‘can’t?’” He asks, tilting his head off to the side like a puppy who didn’t know to call it quits. If it weren’t for his charming concern, you would’ve given him another half-assed response in hopes he’d leave you alone. But alas, it’s Phainon. “Can’t… because I need the Credits.” You attempt to brush off, which quickly blurred into a severe coughing fit, each harsh cough wracking throughout your body where your chest took most of the brunt.

“I already took some medicine before clocking in, just gotta wait for the medicine to run its course.” You try to reason in-between coughs, hoping it was enough for Phainon to raise his hands and say ‘Well, guess you’re fine!’ and walk the other way. But of course, that’s only possible in a perfect world. “There’s no need to get worked up over a small thing—”

“Woah woah hey—” Phainon says softly, his eyes softening with worry as he places a gentle yet protective hand on top of your quivering shoulder, his hand holding you in place in worry of you potentially falling on your face. His frown deepened with how blatant your sickness was hellbent on making your life a living hell.

“I can see where you’re coming from— well, not really. In terms of ‘not getting worked up over a small thing’, seriously… Do you hear yourself?” He begins, prompting you to bite back a retort to his blatant logic. Brows furrowed in obvious displeasure. "But that doesn’t mean you get to clock in and neglect your health in the process just to appease the corporate hell this world piggybacks on.”

Phainon swivels his head around, surveying the gas station for any lingering customers. There’s no one, good. “How about this…?” He turns his head to look back at you, his usual cheerful demeanor taking a backseat. Now looking at you with a firmness that compelled you to listen to him. “Since no one’s here right now, then that means you’re able to take it easy for a little while.”

“And by doing so,” Phainon looks around once more, taking in the endless supply of cigarette packs and vapes. Nope, not what I’m looking for. Bad for the lungs. “I can take care of you in the meantime!” He looked further and spotted the thing he needed: Cough drops— cherry flavored. Perfect. “Ah,” He manages to smile, albeit a small one. “There it is.”

“Stay here—” He says, pushing down on your shoulder lightly, making you plop down onto the rolling chair without putting up a fight. “But what about—”

Phainon rustles the bag of cough drops obnoxiously in order to drown out your weak attempts in shooing him away. “Nope nope nope anddddd nope.” He crouches down in front of you, eyes patient as they were stubborn, opening the bag of cough drops that he knew for sure were bitter to the bone. “I’m not going to let your sickness break you apart, build you back up just to break you down for what you’re worth ‘kay?”

He stands up. “But our manager—” - “Manager what?” Phainon huffs, giving you a glare that’s meant to silence you for a moment; to allow him to let loose and let him nurse you back to health! “If you’re worried about me ‘stealing’ for opening the cough drops before paying, then I'd say that should be the least of your concerns.”

“I’ll pay for it later.” He says matter of factly, shrugging. “Manager will understand, or should.”

“So do me a favor,” He reaches his hand in for a simple cough drop, the sounds of flexible plastic film crinkling reminding you that: Yes, it’s ok to take a break when necessary. Not that Phainon gave you much of an out… though you didn’t really put much of a fight in the first place. You knew you needed a break. “Take…” He trails off, much more focused on unwrapping the cough drop. The tip of his tongue sticking out the corner of his mouth in deep concentration.

Eventually, he manages to unwrap it successfully. “Here,” He breathes out, placing the menacingly dark red cough drop onto your shaky cupped palm. The bitter stench prompting your nose to crinkle involuntarily. “Let it sit on your tongue—” He stops for a moment, catching onto the way you seem offended by the smell. Not good.

He sighs softly in understanding, your reluctant behavior almost tangible in the air. “It’ll be worthwhile… it smells bitter I know, even I don’t like how it settles in my nose, but I promise you it won’t be the end of the worl—” His little speech was abruptly cut short the moment you bobbed your head back, taking the medicine like it was a dreaded pill that made Phainon eyes comically wide and stop dead in his tracks.

He didn’t expect that.

You felt your eyes twitch upon the burst of harsh artificial cherry settling on your tongue, already reacting to the bitterness seeping into your tastebuds— threatening to shrivel up as a defense mechanism. This is disgusting beyond belief, but I have to push forward; for both my health and for Phainon’s peace of mind.

“…Tastes.. Eugh, gross.” You garble, your words hard to follow with how deep you scowled. Still swishing it in your mouth in hopes it’ll melt soon.

Phainon shakes his head, shoulders trembling in quiet mirth. “Ah.. uh… well.” He clasps his hands together, his easy-going smile already creeping its way back on his face with how you easily complied. “I didn’t expect that, but at the same time I should’ve… Should’ve known the moment you decided it was a good idea to waltz in here all sick!”

As you settle down from your cherry medicine disgust induced high, Phainon raises the back of his hand in eyeshot, looking at you attentively. “May I?” He asks, his voice taking on a softer lilt, gesturing to your sweaty forehead. “You look a bit warm, just want to know if there’s anything else I can do to ease your condition.”

Knowing how far Phainon is willing to take care of you while on the clock, there really isn’t much you can do to dissuade him from helping you. Not when he looks like he’d much rather take care of you than assist a potential customer. “Mm… fair enough,” You hiccup, prompting Phainon to lean closer, his free hand hovering over your seated form in case he needed to catch you. “Go ahead.”

He nods politely, pressing the back of his hand lightly against your forehead— warm as a furnace, moist with sweat that didn’t arouse disgust, failing to deter him from taking care of you. “Hm… It’s higher than normal.” He pulls away, brows knitted in deep contemplation, slowly stroking his chin. “Not good.. Not good.”

“Give me a moment, let me think…” He takes a good look around the gas station once more, trying to think of another game plan. Eventually, his eyes settled onto cooling pads neatly stocked on the nearby shelves. He let out a short sigh of relief. Thank the Aeons above I stocked that shelf yesterday, who would’ve thought it’d come in handy.

He turns to face you once more. Maybe the cooling pads will help ease your fever? He won’t know till he tries it! “I think I found something that can ease your temperature a bit.”

“It’ll take a second so wait for me here—”

Ding!

The sound of the bell chime echoed throughout the humble gas station, alerting Phainon’s gaze to tear away from your weak form and to the unknowing customers— two young men, probably around your guys' age. They enter without making a fuss, giving polite nods before disappearing to the many aisles within the station.

It wouldn’t be an issue if customers enter and browse. Typically, all he did was wait behind the counter until they place their items in front of him, scan them, state the cost, bag their items and watch them go their merry way. This time, however…

He has his hands full.

Even more when not only did those young men enter, but they also stood in front of the very shelf he needed to get to.

Great.

But even that, he didn’t let a small obstacle prevent him from playing nurse. He straightens his posture, glancing at you before whispering under his breath: “Stay put and don’t move, I’ll be back before you know it.”

With that, Phainon made his calm exit from behind the counter, already raising his hand up with the intent to wave politely. “Good morning!” He greets, his cheerful voice dripping with friendliness that made heads turn— those customers were no different. They smile, mirroring his greeting in kind.

He sets his eyes on the cooling pads, making a mental note to pay for them later. “If you’ll excuse me, I don’t mean to bother you both,” He states noncommittally, more focused on going back to you rather than prolonging his stay. "If you have any trouble finding anything, then feel free to meet me at the front.”

He responds to their awkward thumbs up with a stiff nod, grabbing a small pack of cooling pads before he makes a light jog towards the front once more— Good, you’re still there. “Hey..” Phainon whispers, his voice taking on a noticeably softer tone as soon as he goes behind the counter. “How do you feel? I know things probably haven't changed much since I left you,” He sets down the box of cooling pads on the floor, opening them with mild haste.

You nod weakly, wiping off the sweat from your forehead in an attempt to cool yourself. “You’re right,” You cough stiffly, sniffling. “Nothing’s changed, but I guess you helping me eases the overall discomfort I feel.”

Huh?

Now that got Phainon’s attention.

He couldn’t help but pause his movements as soon as those words registered in his brain, the cooling pad that lay limp on his open palm now forgotten. “….O-Oh?” He stammers. He did not expect that from you at all, much less if it made him flustered out of all things! Perhaps it was the vulnerability that clung to your words? Or was it because even where all your senses are overridden with persistent sickness, his presence was enough to ease the symptoms?

“Mmm,” You groan slightly, rubbing your eyes before you settle on the tip of his ears— slightly red. Cute. “Hmmm are you getting sick too…?” You ask simply, pointing to the tips of his ears with a limp finger, prompting Phainon to cover his ears immediately. “…Didn’t mean to if that were the case.”

“Eh!?!?” He shrieks. “N-No?!?!” He exclaims loudly, drawing unassuming eyes to the pair by accident. He clears his throat, attempting to save face. Ignoring the suspicious brow you raised. “I mean.. Uh… no.”

“Though…” Whatever the case may be, there was no mistaking the soft pink hue dusting the apples of his cheeks, highlighting the subtle shyness that lined the iris of his sky blue eyes. “I— I, I mean?? That’s…”

“Sweet?” He admits softly, slipping past his lips without much thought— breathless almost? Almost like he couldn’t believe it himself. A soft chuckle leaves his lips, shaking his head. His pale blue strands fall over his left eye, obscuring whatever is left of his momentary flusteredness. “Don’t mind me,” He exhales. “Just going through the motions, guess it doesn’t help that it’s morning… still muddled with drowsiness.”

Sadly for Phainon, the sweet and tender bubble the two of you shared quickly burst as soon as a faint thump of merchandise was placed on the counter— ah, he forgot. He’s still on the clock.

He snaps his head towards the nosy customers, who were busy angling their heads. Wondering why the pale blue-haired worker took too long. “Give me a moment,” Phainon says curtly, waving his hand that shows he did not want them to pry, nor did he give them much of a choice with how cold his voice sounded.

His typical warmth? Gone. Replaced with a firmness that meant he had no intention of entertaining disrespect. “You can afford to wait a minute or two.”

The young men sigh, shrugging their shoulders in unison as they stood there awkwardly. “…’Kay, sorry.” One of them had the courage to apologize, to which Phainon didn’t pay much attention to— He’s a man on a mission.

“Hmmm now where was I?” He hums softly, returning his attention back onto you, where you stared at him like he was a whole different person. He presses his lips in a tight line. "I know what you're going to say... So I'm going to beat you to it." He sighs deeply. Contemplative. “Worry not, I’m not mad… just…” He tried to explain as calmly as he could, his voice hushed, yet there was no mistaking the annoyance that rolled off his tongue. “…Somewhat peeved is all, there was absolutely no need to pry.”

“It grates my nerves a bit, nothing major.” He sets the cooling pad on your moist forehead, eliciting a quiet sigh of relief to slip through your teeth. It made his annoyance dissipate just a bit. “There, how do you feel?” He asks, his hands hovering over at your sides, looking at you with all the patience and worry in the world that it left you speechless— only then did you nod your head.

“Perfect!” He exclaims. Turning around to now face the young men with a smile— albeit strained. Apprehension lining their shoulders in fear of irritating the very much protective man behind the counter. He’s not one to be trifled with, they note.

Phainon scans the items without much issue, each swipe was meticulous as it was quick. “That’ll be 1000 Credits.” He states, gesturing to the card reader with an open palm. The men spent no time in paying, saying a short ‘goodbye’ before ushering themselves out of the gas station, allowing Phainon to let out a much needed exhale. “Phew…”

He turns to face you once more, giving you a onceover to see if there was any lingering discomfort you didn’t voice out. “Better?” You nod your head, giving a thumbs up.

“Better.” You smile weakly. “Better than before.”

a/n: this was just a mini warmup for the angsty hugo oneshot i so desperately want to write but i fear i need to force my brain to be in 'writing' mode rather than 'dilly-dallying' mode!!! i tried starting it yesterday night but i was drawing blanks 😔 so i knew i had to call it a day and sleep. but ngl i also want to write for lighter (which i'm kinda scared to write for since i'm not well acquainted with his character, but it doesn't hurt to try??? + challenging yourself is very much fun),,, so i may write for lighter first since it's more on the silly end of things and then i'll tackle the beast,,, which is hugo's angst ohngmgod </3 NEVERR giving him a break even if it's outside of zzz whoopsies 👀 so why not warm myself up with a silly and sweet phainon oneshot?? i've been meaning to write for phainon for awhile now, but no ideas felt good for him + i kinda forgot his little quirks so apologies if this is not an accurate portrayal of his character :) + I didn't mean to make it long yet again, I was just yapping towards the end man 😔

my plans may be scrapped

because now i have more ideas i want to write about!!! like at this point it's getting RIDICULOUS 😭😭😭GIRLL TAKE A BREAK !!! like girl omg take two deep breaths and CHILLL i have so many ideas bouncing off of my head at once and i'm like "omg wait let me write this down on the doc!!" because i know later on i'm going to forgegt but the moment i write down the summary of the idea, i end up writing the entire oneshot in one sitting (the recent nonchalant caelus one is the best example, like girl i wrote that in under 30 minutes 😭) ^ i think what helped me was that I was already writing the long harumasa oneshot by then so ofc my brain was still fresh or wtv (mind you, writing the ONE sentence summary of the nonchalant caelus oneshot thing was during my BREAK time from the harumasa one 😭) that's how yk i write for funsies 💔 ts a hobby 💔

a photo only looks good if the muse is loved by the photographer

. . . synopsis: You’re Harumasa's muse and he’s in awe but you’re unaware of his adoration. . . . wc: 4.4k

. . . notes: might be ooc, not proofread, harumasa may be whipped for his best friend, reader is self-conscious about their image on camera, reader scrutinizes their image, angsty in terms of low self-esteem, it gets stupidly fluffy at the end i pinky swear!! . . . mini reply: oh em gee it's been a fat minute LMAOOO but hehe yess,, harumasa fluffy oneshot mixed with some angst?!? literally the best way to introduce his rerun (finally!!) may the harumasa lovers enjoy this post hehe . . . song recs: hero (inst.) by meego (for the beginning) + everyone adores you (atleast i do) by matt maltese (the second song is purely for the lyrics, not the music itself. Think of lyrics as a glimpse of harumasa’s mind whenever he sees/thinks of you). + love. by wave to earth. (also for the vibes, only listen to it whenever you reach the '— ✧' mark). . . . minor note: happy birthday harumasa :)

Not everyone is photogenic.

It was a heavy fact you unfortunately had to come to terms with whenever someone managed to snap a candid photo of you. At first, you could get by with your candid photos not looking pleasing to the eye, you didn’t react in time to pose appropriately when one of your friends cheekily snapped photos of you cluelessly slurping your ramen.

But each time your friend ‘innocently’ showed you the candid photo on their phone, their expression eager and a hand barely covering their poor attempt in stifling their piercing giggles, trying to show the hilarity the picture caused— you were always left with a foul taste in your mouth, your shoulders trembling slightly before slumping in submission to being that day’s laughing stock.

And your self-esteem weakening bit by bit as the cherry on top.

“My left eye looks disproportionate in comparison to my right eye.”

“Why does my hair look so tacky and out of place?”

“Why am I slouching like that?”

“Why do I open my mouth like that?”

“Why do I look like that?”

Each little comment that flooded your brain was more than enough to make you second guess yourself, enough to scrutinize yourself in the gloomy bathroom of the quaint ramen restaurant. Fingers pulling at your lower eyelids, looking for any anomalies you swore were present. Poking and prodding at your reddened skin that begged to be treated with a respect you gave others freely, but rarely ever directed at yourself.

It was a dehumanizing act, but it was an act that made you feel alive. Picking yourself apart helplessly to find beauty that can easily be seen behind an artificial lens instead of your own, even more so when you scrolled through social media and saw others’ candid photos— effortless, raw and…

Beautiful.

Just the mere thought of someone asking to take a picture of you was enough to make you shake your head vehemently internally. To shrink back into the self-internalized scrutiny you forcefully conditioned yourself to find comfort in. But all that comes out from your shaky lips was a short and simple:

“No, but thank you for asking!”

All said with a polite yet wobbly smile. A smile that was sincere in its kindness, but insincere with the happiness of its wielder.

So when Harumasa approached you holding his trusty camera he rarely parts with, his pointer finger resting harmlessly on the shutter button.

It was practically hide or flight for you.

“Oh (Name)!”

Harumasa waves, picking up his pace a tad (which isn’t alot) in order to catch up with your quick steps in kind. His lips stretch into a genuine smile upon seeing his good friend out and about in Port Elpis.

“…I forget how quick you walk whenever I’m in the vicinity…” He says in between soft pants, chest heaving slightly, followed by his yellow headband sticking to his sweaty forehead. “I’m not sure if it’s to give me a good goose chase or if it’s to spite me, either way, don’t expect me to fall behind~”

You give a weak laugh at Harumasa’s light tease, choosing to pat his shoulder gently with silent remorse. “It’s not to spite you I can assure you of that,” Harumasa slowly straightened his posture. “I just like to get from point A to point B in a timely manner, it’s nothing personal.”

“But forget that,” You cough awkwardly into your elbow as your eyes betray your curiosity by settling on his camera, causing your mouth to feel dry upon its artificial lens glaring at you. “I… I think we have more pressing matters to acknowledge—”

“Oh this?” He speaks up, gesturing to the camera by holding it up to the center of his chest, eyebrows raised. “Ah this thing…” He shrugs. “Yeah, I managed to buy myself a camera during my time skipping—”

He pauses abruptly, looking side to side slowly before he lowered his voice to a whisper. “I mean…”

“My paid time off!” He circles back with a cheerful lilt, head tilting off to the side oh so innocently, acting like his little slip-up was nothing more than a comedic act. “And with how HAND has been breathing down everyone’s neck… it’s only fair I try to squeeze in some relaxation time before we’re sent back to the unforgiving Hollows–” A small defiant puff of air left his lips. “…And the woes of paperwork, can’t forget that now can we?”

You nod your head as a polite gesture, trying your utmost best to distract Harumasa from the apprehension making itself home at the tip of your tongue. “Guess not,” You kick a pebble off to the side, watching it skitter away beyond the dock. “I’m assuming you haven’t gotten around to trying your new camera?”

Harumasa hums in agreement, allowing his gloved finger to caress the lens mount in thought. “Funnily enough, no I haven’t”

“But!”

He pauses, gazing at you with a mix of warmth and… concern? Like he knew something was awry, knew something was clawing away at you, drowning whatever was left of a positive attitude towards yourself. Which was close to none.

It made his stomach churn.

“You can help me change that!” He says, tapping the side of his camera rhythmically as you struggle to not visibly shift uncomfortably where you currently stood. “Consider it a little photoshoot between nature and man,” He offers with a steady open palm, as though trying to aid a drowning man from their own misery. “And I know you’d be the perfect candidate for it! Besides~, the rest of Section 6 aren’t here so obviously they can’t volunteer…”

“So… would you like to help your weak friend in need~?”

You stare at his open palm with quiet reluctance, feeling your heart skip a beat— not because you were flustered. No. But because the mere thought of being captured on camera again, for the camera to capture everything but the qualities you once thought were deserving of awe and love?

No, there’s absolutely no chance of you consenting to being his muse.

And yet?

Even if your self-deprecating addled mind says to turn your back on him and decline, to put a wall between you and the inevitable disappointment and despair that comes with being photographed.

Something about this was different.

Perhaps it was because you were told beforehand that you were getting photographed. No more candid photos? That means I can pose and smile with flawless intention? Or it was the way Harumasa was gazing at you like you were his last hope; with those damned puppy eyes of his.

On purpose or not, you didn’t know. But you knew you didn’t want to let a good friend like him down.

Though, the lack of response from your part made Harumasa’s throat dry, making him a teensy bit agitated with how your brows were furrowed. The deep lines that either screamed displeasure or deep thought— the young man didn’t know, and sincerely? He hoped it was the latter.

“Sure,” You agree willingly, although it sounded like you had to wrangle and force your vocal chords to cooperate. You give a weak smile, trying to ease the tense atmosphere back to its cheerful tones moments before. If I'm getting photographed, at least it’s by someone I trust. “I’ll… help you with your photography, just—”

Harumasa nods thoughtfully, encouraging you to continue. “…Don’t expect me to be phenomenal at it, I’m not photogenic in the slightest and I don’t want to disappoint you with my—”

“Woah woah woah woah there my friend!”

Harumasa put an immediate stop to your words— deprecating thoughts being spoken out into the crisp air of Port Elpis. He gives you a firm look that stops you in your tracks, your breath hitching without you realizing it.

Harumasa stares at you a bit longer, as though trying to communicate unspoken words through his gaze alone:

Listen to me.

“First off,” He begins, placing his hand on his hip. “I never asked you to look good as I take pictures, I asked you to help me— not once had I given you a vain requirement.” He scoffs incredulity, unable to swallow the subtle bitterness that hangs low in his mouth— and not the good type of bitterness he enjoys. What do you take me for? “And I trust my judgment. You’d be perfect for my photoshoot.”

“So please,” He whispers, his voice taking on a pleading tone, barely audible under the flippant wind; as though afraid of shattering this delicate and vulnerable moment if he raises his voice a notch. His smile was weak yet genuine. “Don’t doubt yourself when you haven’t even given yourself the chance to….” He laughs, a soft puff of air betraying his disbelief.

“Well, live freely without feeling like you’re occupying a space meant for someone else.”

Ah.

What do you even say to that?

There was nothing you could do but stare at your friend with eyes wide as saucers, your mouth slightly agape with the intention to…

What?

Give a half-hearted response and say “That’s how the cookie crumbles.” in that resigned tone of yours? Or to foolishly dismiss his words in an attempt to shield yourself from the blatant truth— that yes, you do feel sorry for occupying a space meant for someone who is photogenic.

Whatever the case may be, Harumasa didn’t give you much time to dwell on it further for how he snapped you back to the waking world, placing a gentle hand on top of your shoulder. Rubbing it in a way that’s a bit awkward, but the desire to see his friend’s smile outrivaled any discomfort from his part. "touchy subject… that I’m aware of,” He says awkwardly, trying to find a way to navigate the pool of vulnerability that lay bare in front of him. “But— here, how about this instead.”

He slowly glides his hand away from your shoulder, before reaching out for your limp hand on your side, allowing you to watch his gentle movements and to give you an easy out if you so wished. There, he gives it a light squeeze, feeling the way your pulse raced underneath his hold. He couldn’t stifle his frown.

He waits for you to give any semblance of a response— be it non-verbal or verbal. Anything.

You swallow back a dry lump, trying to disperse the lump of pins and needles filled with heavy emotions lodged within your throat. “Mhm.” You hum, barely audible with how inaudible it sounded when it slipped past your pressed lips.

“Stay with me now,” He murmurs under his breath, watching you with an attentive yet patient gaze. A gaze reserved for those he cares about, for those who needed a mini pick me up during rough times. “Just—” He gestures to the sea.

What is he trying to tell me?

“Watch the ocean with me,” He says simply, ignoring how his raven strands billowed in the wind with a quiet ferocity. Covering his eyes, obscuring the despair that draped over you so blatantly. “We don’t need to exchange any words for now, just watch and we can stop whenever you’re ready.”

And there, you simply watched with a distant look, lost in your own thoughts where time was nothing but a concept. No words between you two exchanged, just the comfort of each other's presence accompanied by the ocean breeze. There, you watch the waves crash against each other with strength that makes it practically impossible for anyone to not get swept up away in its chaotic currents; and despite it all? The ocean itself still went on like it was nothing.

That thought alone seemed to shake some weight off your shoulders. Like everything will be okay.

You clear your throat, attempting to garner his attention without using your words. He turns his head to face you, allowing a tiny smile to grace his lips, trying to coax you into speaking your mind— freely. Free of judgment. “…I— Thank you,” You manage to speak, your voice strained and edged with minor shakiness. “I don’t know where to begin, don’t even know how to thank you for not forcing me to spill thoughts that I have yet to confront myself.”

You let your elbows rest on top of the railings, allowing your gaze to sweep across the ocean without your insecurities holding you back. “You let me draw my own conclusions,” He nods, mirroring your movements in kind; though, he rests his cheek on his palm, watching you intently. “It’s liberating to be given support without feeling as though I’m forced to speak— Even now, I'm still struggling to put my gratitude into words.”

Harumasa sighs, the sound soft with how it landed between you two in a moment of prolonged silence. There, he studies your side profile with a tender-gaze smile. His golden eyes— now soft, traced the gradual slope of your nose, down to the curve of your lips that rarely smiles, to the small faded scars that littered beneath your skin’s surface— all of it. Nothing was left unseen by his gaze.

If only you can see yourself through my lens, maybe then you’ll stop in your tracks and see how radiant you truly are.

Sadly for the Section 6 Officer however, he was snapped out of his tender induced study with the sound of your voice— soft, but a lot livelier than before. A sound he didn’t realize he had missed.

“I’m ready for your photoshoot now, Harumasa!”

What?? Already?

He clears his throat, trying to gather his bearings by smoothing out the imaginary wrinkles on his normal attire. “You’re ready, you say?” He asks, sounding a bit unsure with how eager you sound, a stark contrast to the gloomy and reluctance oozing out from your being mere minutes ago.

To that thought, he nods stiffly. He restrained himself. Harumasa cannot afford your anxieties to resurface and diminish the confidence you’re barely regaining. Yet a tiny part of him wishes he’s able to take pictures with his mind, to be able to capture a candid shot of your happiness and hang it on his wall. But alas, he’s unable to.

Maybe next time.

“I am.” You reassure him, smiling shyly in such a manner that made him want to whip out his camera and snap a picture right then and there. You turn to face him fully, leaning your back against the railing. “I want to help you out of course, what type of friend would I be if I… didn’t?”

“What also helped me was watching the ocean waves crash into each other, and then…” You let a puff of air leave your lips, glancing at the ocean momentarily, sending a fleeting thanks before returning your gaze back to him. “Watching the ocean move on like nothing..? It shifted things in perspective for me, that yes, what I’m going through isn’t a permanent state of being.”

“That’s..” He shakes his head, looking both in disbelief but mainly… proud? “That wasn’t my intended message at the beginning, I was more so trying to get your mind off of your gloomy state, but—”

He offers a weak smile, shrugging. “If that’s what worked for you,” He pauses momentarily, like he was forgetting something. “Then who am I to interfere?”

Ah right, the shoot…

He almost forgot.

He shakes his head, attempting to get a clear mind before he even begins the shoot. “Right, right— How can I forget that little detail?” He laughs, a closed eye smile showcasing his happiness at your confidence peeking through the once bleak shadows called insecurity.

With that, he claps his hands together like a director using a clapperboard before executing the scene. “I do have a few poses I want you to try out, so…” He hums, already picking up his camera— the same one hanging from his neck, now in his gloved hands.

“Just.. follow my lead! It doesn’t matter how goofy I look when I try to show you the poses,” he tries to reassure, though his voice did waver by a tad, yet he ignored it. Out of earshot, out of mind!!! “I just know you’ll do a better job than I, that’s why I’m the photographer instead of the oh so lovely muse~”

— ✧

For them, time passed by like a blur.

Harumasa couldn’t recall the many times he swears he looked like a fool doing a finger heart or by doing the upside down peace sign with his palm facing upwards— he felt silly, sure. But when your giggles rang throughout Port Elpis, prompting those bloodthirsty seagulls to whip their heads at the melodic sound before flying away?

Gods, he was beyond elated he caught that unforgettable moment on camera.

But alas, time flies when one is having fun. The sun began to make its descent below the horizon, the once blue skies now mixed with orange and pinkish hues, clouds of all shapes and sizes evaporating into the sunset ridden skies. The small crowds that once shrouded Port Elpis with effortless cheer and boisterous chatter, now dissipated into subdued chatter and awed eyes marveling at the sky.

Just like the two of you.

There, the two of you decided to call it quits for today. Relaxing while shaking away the tension that came with posing for hours on end, your eyes fix on the gargantuan Hollow that stared back at you— like an abyss staring back at you. “…Man I’m spent,” Harumasa says in-between a yawn, a tiny tear escaping his waterline. “I didn’t expect photographing to be so time consuming,” he says with a feigned frown, all for show. Feeling your eyes on him now. “Though I should’ve known…” He shrugs, pretending to act clueless. “Eh, whatever… anything that isn’t related to work or rigorous activity shouldn’t—”

“Mmh, I'll save my chatter for later,” He says with a sigh, “I warrant you’re far more interested in the pictures I took rather than my boring words boring you to death?”

“No?” You say with a giggle, shaking your head. You knew Harumasa gets a bit sassy whenever the time struck, now was no different. “Quite the opposite… I’m more interested in whatever you have to say than how the photos turned out.”

You sigh, the once light-hearted mood now taking a slight melancholy turn. “If I’m being quite honest,” you pause momentarily, squeezing the metal railing in an attempt to ground yourself. “I’m a bit apprehensive about the idea of seeing a photo of myself, this type of… well, insecurity, cannot disappear after a single talk and watching the ocean, y’know?”

“It isn’t simple, though I sincerely wish it was.”

Ah, I see. He thinks. Of course it won’t be easy.

“Although your words ring true…” Harumasa takes the opportunity to scoot a bit closer to your side, thumbs resting on the cross buttons. “…It doesn’t mean it won’t dictate your world forever, y’know?”

“You’re right.”

He angles the screen towards your eyes. Gazing at you with a patience that couldn’t be found in your aforementioned friend at the ramen restaurant. “Here,” He says softly, his voice a tender rumble in his chest with how he placed his treasured camera in your hands. “How about you be the judge of what photos stay in my camera roll in the meantime, hm?”

You accept his offer with mild apprehension. With your past experience slowly resurfacing once more: The snickers, the hands covering their mouths, their piercing gaze meant to unravel your insecurities and morph them into mere toys for their amusement.

Those thoughts were enough to elicit an involuntary shiver. Sighing, you glance down at the small screen that broadcasted a captivating person that pulled you right in, forcing you to stare at the screen head on. This.. person, whose presence through the screen was nothing short of bewitching, looked a whole lot like…

You?

“Wow,” you marvel, your eyes widening with each photo that Harumasa manages to capture effortlessly. You could’ve sworn your heart skipped a beat each time you stared at a picture of… well… yourself for too long.

“That’s me?”

Oh, how Harumasa wanted to quip a teasing comment. Saying “Pfft yeah that’s you, who else would it be? Everyone adores you.” Though the way your voice got higher with each tiny, excited squeal that left your lips, with how your eyes seem to sparkle underneath the last few rays of light making its descent below the horizon?

He didn’t have the heart to tease you now. Even less with how he has his cheek propped up against the palm of his hand, elbow resting on the metal railing, gazing at you the same way a love-struck boyfriend would whenever their lover did anything in his general vicinity.

“Oh my goodness it is me!!” You exclaim, beaming ear to ear with each light press of your thumbs on the rubber cross keys, your cheeks almost hurting with how long you smiled. “I didn’t know I could smile like that? It looks as though my smile lit up the entire space?? Is that even possible??”

Whenever you’re concerned, yes it is. The sun pales in comparison to your beaming smile.

“Even with my hair looking out of place, it almost… Doesn't? Like the wind knew how to capture the ‘crazy but stunning’ look? It’s… perfect.”

Your hair always looks perfect, you don’t need the wind to try to perfect something that’s already perfect.

“And my eyes?? I look so..” You hiccup, taken aback with the gorgeous person looking back at you on the screen— with their kind eyes staring at the artificial lens like nothing could knock them down, like everything was okay. “…Happy, so sparkly… I’m sure it had to be the light reflecting off my eyes, right?” You say, finally looking up at Harumasa for answers.

Though he didn’t offer a response. Only continuing to look at you with dilated pupils, his ill heart slowing its heartbeat when your dazzling eyes locked eyes with his own.

The sun’s rays didn't cause your eyes to ‘sparkle’, your eyes already sparkle on the daily.

You’re finally realizing what I’ve known since I’ve had the fortune of meeting you.

“Hmm?” Your constant calls for him seemed to rouse Harumasa from his mild daydreaming, blinking to refocus his gaze back to reality. “Oh—” He clears his threat, a soft pink hue lighting the tips of his ears at being put on the spot. Thank god my hair covers the tips of my ears. “Your eyes, you say? Well… they were already like that when I took the photo.” He shrugs, trying to act indifferent even though he was making sure he got your good angles, even if his body tried to defy him for moving more than he could withstand. “Don’t flatter me too much or else it’ll get to my head~”

You sigh. Part of you didn't believe his humble words of "oh that was totally not me and was obviously all you! Ha ha ha ha!" but then again, you didn’t know if that was your insecurity thinking for you, or if it was the facts.

Either way, you didn’t allow yourself to dwell on it for too long. All you were interested in were these gorgeous pictures and how to print them out as soon as possible!

“To answer your previous question…” You begin. Harumasa hums intently, scooting a bit closer, to not only watch you pick whatever photos you want to keep in your camera roll.

But to see your face up close.

You browse through the plethora of photos your good friend took, marveling at them with a gleeful expression that made Harumasa’s heart do two flips. “I’d say keep them all!”

“All?” He answers, the way his tone of voice rose in pitch slightly was a dead giveaway of his shock.

“Mhm!” You beam. “All of them! You make me look otherworldly, as if I didn’t have any flaws at all? Like, you captured all my good parts so effortlessly!”

Flaws?

Harumasa bit back his frown, resorting to biting his cheek for some solace in the name of your cluelessness. If only you knew your flaws are also your good parts.

Harumasa coughs weakly into the back of his gloved hand, not missing the way your face visibly scrunched into worry. Ah, they’ll think it’s my illness acting up. If only they knew. “Mm? You’re looking at me as though I coughed up a storm,” He waves his hand dismissively. “Relax, it’s just a bit of pollen that got into my nose, nothing entirely worrisome I’d say~”

“Now come on,” He hums, placing both hands on top of your shoulders as he turns you around— away from him and his pink hued ears. “Reserve a bench for us in the meantime, i’ll freshen myself up by taking my ‘daily dose of medicine’ ‘kay~?”

You press your lips in a tight line, grumbling words he and you could barely make out, but you acquiesce anyway. It was on brand for Harumasa to take his medicine at specific intervals of the day, and you respected him enough to give him the space he desired.

You clutch his camera tightly. “Fine, fine, I understand…” You give in, your shoulders slackening. “I’ll go find a place for us to wind down, you try to get better alright?” You remind him before escorting yourself out, your figure shrinking with each step you take away from him, prompting him to look up at the now night sky— all with a wistful expression that was rare for the Section 6 Officer.

He rests his forearms against the metal railing, looking up at the stars, looking for answers— or perhaps a star that mirrors the radiance you’re oh so blind to. “Is this what it feels like when someone fails to see what you see?” He shakes his head. Ridiculous.

He inhales slowly, allowing the fresh and crisp ocean breeze to calm his senses, to wallow in the way the world seemed to stop whenever you were in frame, to how his thoughts seemed to escape his mind whenever you happen to lock eyes with him.

It was cathartic to be on the receiving end of your sublime, and though it renders him a speechless, gawking fool whenever you’re around? Harumasa’s more than happy to be your fool, and more so when it comes to documenting the beauty that exudes from your being effortlessly.

He’d take care of the beautiful fairytale between you two— the fairytale between the lovestruck artist and his adoring muse.

a/n: i know i'm practically late to the party with the harumasa post,, by like what? 6 days?? uh ouh, i mean... better late than never?? and harumasa got LUCKY because this is my longest single oneshot BY FAR??? but wowie i guess this can be considered my first proper angst post? it's been a while since i've written angst ever since my first long writing hiatus, so apologies if the angst is a bit rusty! it's my first time introducing the fic in the reader's perspective!! i decided to challenge myself this time around, so if it reads a bit awkward then you know why!! feuifseuighegsu harumasa yearner is real ok let the man YEARN !! + i got inspired by a comment i saw on an instagram reel so uhhhhh yeah that's where the inspiration came from wowie ok !! i think it's safe to assume that i'm on a roll today!!! thjis is my second fic of the day are we proud of ourselves here !! this is what happens when i'm in a flow state, i write too much!!

nonchalant boyfriend creature

. . . synopsis: in which you easily melt caelus' faux nonchalance with your mere presence alone! . . . wc: 943 . . . notes: might be ooc, caelus is a whiny dorky loser in this one (all said with nothing but aggressive affection), genuinely down bad for his s/o, established relationship, reader is a tease, mild suggestiveness but it's fluffy overall. . . . mini reply: UFHAEFUJIGSJN I'm sorry that I never replied to this ohmg like all it has been doing is sitting in my inbox for well over a month or so uhhh !! ik you didn't ask for a caelus oneshot by any means but consider this a mini apology for my lack of response 🤔😵‍💫

“What’re you doing..?”

Caelus grumbles with a slight pout, his speech almost garbled with how you were smushing his cheeks against your hands like he was some little raccoon that needed to be taught a lesson. He must admit, the feeling of your warm and soothing palms pressing against his flushed cheeks was almost enough to render him a puddle of your soft and gooey affections.

No, he must stay focused and remain unbothered!

He has an image to upkeep. To remind you that he is not one to be trifled with under any circumstances, to remind you that he is unflappable and most definitely not a pushover!

But he wasn’t sure how long that faux bravado of his is going to stay upright with how he’s currently trapped in your soft and warm hands.

A soft, easy-going giggle slips past your lips upon seeing your boyfriend’s adorable little pout, the way his bottom lip jutted out slightly, making his cheeks all the more doughy and kneadable?? Aeons, does he know what effect he has on me?

“Mmh nothing,” You hum, causing Caelus’ eyes to narrow in suspicion, trying to look intimidating. Which only served to be against his favor with how he only seemed to be getting cuter by the minute. How can my boyfriend be this cute?? “Just admiring my boyfriend when he tries so hard to be something he’s not, it’s really adorable if i do say so myself.”

“Uhn!??!”

Caelus places his hands on top of your wrists and tries to pry himself away from your everso loving grip that he, internally, does not want to free himself from. He’ll gladly be a prisoner to your whims if it weren’t for the fact that his nonchalance was on the line.

He won’t tell you that though.

“No I’m not,” he whines, his voice wavering and raising a bit to the point of sounding pathetic. A burning sensation lines his now red hued ears, to the point that if you were to touch them a little sizzle could be heard, alongside steam pouring out from your fingertips. “I’m just..”

“Ugh..” He smushes his face against your palms, giving into his true feelings for a split moment. “I’m nonchalant…” He mumbles breathlessly into the comfort of your warm palms, trying to convince himself. “Can’t you see? I haven’t crumbled to your very mean way of trying to derail me— I remain standing!”

By those sheer words alone, you couldn’t tell if your boyfriend was trying to convince himself or if he wholeheartedly believed he was winning.

You assume the former.

“Is that so?” You croon softly, your voice dripping with slight mischief that made Caelus’ stomach do a few tricks, pulling at heartstrings he so believed were made out of steel— Set in its ways and unrelenting. You lean down, letting your breath fan the outer edge of his red hued ear in a teasing manner. “‘Cause I think your body is singing a whole different tune with how you’re acting like a meek raccoon in my hands.”

“And I didn’t do anything yet—”

“Yet?”

The flustered man gulps, his Adam's apple bobbing with each shaky breath that warmed your palms, his once defiant grip against your wrists now turning slack with each sly word that caressed his ears. He’s so stuck in your web.

And the worst part? He didn’t mind it.

And suddenly? That once nonchalant bravado was thrown out the window with how you were speaking to him in that downright sinful tone of yours.

And with that, without taking into consideration of your reaction, he practically pounced on you with whatever was left of his strength, ignoring the soft ‘oomph’ that left your lips as your back collided with the cushions. Small pillows that once adorned the couch were nothing but a second thought, scattered across the floor when faced with Caelus’ recklessness.

Even if he was technically the one in control, with his body smushed on top of yours, clothes to clothes, skin to skin— a tiny part of him knew very well that he was nothing more than a small puppy pawing at the floor, whining for any semblance of affection from the one he adores.

A breathless huff slips past your lips, but even then you still wrap your arms around his waist in your loose hold. “Seems like someone wants to get a bit handsy—”

“No…!!” Caelus whines against the curve of your shoulder, nuzzling his flushed cheek against the juncture between your shoulder and neck, eyes forcefully shut in an attempt to ground himself. “Your words they…” He gulps in-between shaky breaths, voice wobbly with unrestrained agitation. “They make me feel warm, okay?? I can’t help it!!”

You sigh. Part of you wanted to egg your sweet boyfriend on to see what other adorable reactions and sweet sounds you could elicit, but from how he was practically shaking like a leaf in your arms?? You couldn’t bring yourself to tease him further. Not if you wanted to risk him exploding on the spot.

“Shh shh, fine fine.” You give in softly, your voice taking on a warmer tone than usual. His breathing patterns slow in response to your soft croon. “No more teasing tonight.” You whisper against his gray strands, your fingers massaging the back of his head with tender care.

“I’ll take care of you.”

He curls up to your comfortable form, his eyes relaxing from their once forced muscle tension. “…Mphm.. Good.”  He slurs against your skin, the tip of his nose stroking your shoulder in an attempt to lull himself to sleep.

“I’ll take your word for it.”

. . . synopsis: you let classmate!cissia borrow your pen and she doesn't give it back but the reasoning behind it is sweet . . . wc: 3.2k . . . notes: might be ooc, cissia is a chatty and bumbling mess, reader is lowk done with her shenanigans, severian mentioned briefly, p*syics mentioned, overall fluffy and silly . . . heart divider: @angeliicide

“Darn it!! Do I not have a pen on me?”

Cissia groaned into her hands, feeling as though the world around her began to crumble when she was the only one standing. Had it not been for Chalky who ‘accidently’ ate her pen, to which till this day, Cissia still thinks it was to spite her because she prioritized her cravings over Chalky… Then she wouldn’t be in this predicament in the first place. If it were a normal week, Cissia wouldn’t have cared if she lost a pen. For all she knew, she would’ve used her ‘pen-less™’ condition as a way to weave herself out of finishing up assignments, to maybe even have a chance of sneaking past that ‘demon lord’ of the student council president from giving her a glare that reeked of severe condemnation each time she skipped had lunch!

But with finals week steadily approaching her like an unwanted shadow alongside her questionable marks— both unseen yet heavy entities breathing down her neck like an unspoken taunt. Refusing to back down until she actually took her studies seriously for the first time in the 4 years she’s been in school.

Just the mere thought about it made her shiver violently in her seat. Eugh… that demon lord better not be on my case again.

It was nothing short of a miracle she managed to pass some most of her classes. But even then, a cunning snake knew when to call it quits when her luck began to run out, and had to rely on sheer skill when it came to passing classes at a decent level.

So it was no surprise when her eyes never strayed too far from your pencil bag, filled deliciously to the brim with a wide variety of pens and pencils. All stacked so elegantly in a way that made her want to ‘stretch’ her arm over to your side and snatch one without looking back.

“Uh… (Name)?” Cissia gulped, feeling like her underlying guilt was tripping her up on purpose for how she sounded like a bumbling fool in front of you!

Out of all people!

Her eyes scrambled to maintain eye contact with you… and a random wall within the classroom, but resorted to your forehead instead. “I hope I didn’t catch you at the wrong time or anything like that…!! If I did then I am so terribly sorry—” She paused abruptly, already second guessing her impulsive decision of asking you right off the bat the moment her ears caught onto the squeakiness of her voice.

This cannot get more embarrassing than this! Why does my voice sound like that? I don’t remember having such a squeaky voice… You can’t be this much of a wimp, seriously… Come on Cissia!! It’s just a stupid pen.. It shouldn’t be that hard to ask for one—

“Yes Cissia?”

Crap.

Her shoulders went rigid immediately, as though unable to handle the guilt of asking for something she deems trivial. Were my thoughts too loud? “Oh (Name)!!!” She coughed loudly, trying to hide stabilize her shaky hands by steepling. “Oh you know,” She hummed thoughtfully, feigning nonchalance she’s clearly lacking with the way her voice wavered. “I just… wanted to ask you a favor! a tiny one… It can truly save my life if you’re able to help me out here!”

You raised your eyebrow, taking note as to how freakishly on edge Cissia was. Hell, she couldn’t even maintain consistent eye contact with you— resorting to staring at your forehead instead in hopes you didn’t catch onto the anxiousness oozing from the young snake thiren.

Whatever the case may be for her sudden nervousness, you couldn't bring it in yourself to deny your seatmate’s whims. Not when it looked like she was mere seconds away from either bolting out the classroom, or sweating buckets until she’s a puddle of her own nerves.

Biting your inner cheek, you stared at Cissia’s sheepish expression for a moment longer. “I don’t see the harm in helping you out,” You shrugged, trying your best to ease your seatmate’s neverending anxieties with a tiny smile. To which the slight, persistent apprehensive quiver that lined her shoulders seemed to mellow out. “If it has gotten you that worked up, I’m sure it’s something worth mentioning.”

“So? What seems to be the matter? Is it notes?? Are you struggling to understand the material..? Or—”

“Oh no no no!!” Cissia vehemently shook her head, waving her hands in front of her chest to squash any potential misunderstandings and ‘what ifs’ “Oh it’s definitely not that, alright?? I do not need a mini lesson on how to… uh,” She stroked her chin in deep thought, her nerves suddenly forgotten. “Do math? Science?? Language… arts??? I dunno. Don’t know, don’t care. That’s not my problem, okay (Name)?” She huffed.

“Anyways… back to the topic at hand,” She cleared her throat, “My favor.. So uh… I kinda need a pen…” She gulped. “For some inexplicable reason, Chalky had the gall to eat my itty bitty pen that I was saving until the end of our final year!”

What.

Cissia did NOT miss the confusion and concern that swirled within your pupils, to which she took it as an opportunity to continue spewing her unavoidable tragedy . . . in typical Cissia fashion. “Ugh… thinking about it makes me want to—” She slammed her head against the wooden desk, eliciting a suppressed yelp to slip past her fangs, drawing confused murmurs and prying eyes from curious classmates in your general direction.

This day could NOT get any weirder than this.

“Ah… I see.” You managed to mutter with barely restrained embarrassment, refusing to let the awkward silence settle in the classroom. “I guess that is a cause for concern—”

Cissia jolted suddenly, her body springing vertically like a whip. Her head swiveled to face you once more, blinking erratically like she was at her breaking point. I probably look like an actual crazy person in front of them, but I already dug myself a hole deeper than anything I’ve dug through… so I might as well play into it!!

Her hands slammed against her desk, causing her poor empty plastic water bottle to crinkle sharply in protest to her rambunctious behavior. “And oh don’t get me started on Chalky’s insatiable appetite… I can hardly keep up with my voracious appetite as is!! What makes anyone think I can continuously supply Chalky with the goods!??!”

“And also oh my god, talking about Chalky—”

“I think I got the memo, Cissia.”

“Oh.. really?” Her voice jumped to an octave, a traitorous squeak slipping past her lips.

“Yes… really.” You sighed sharply. “You need a pen, right?”

“Uh…” Cissia picked at her nails. “That’s right, you’re right on the money!” She blinked rapidly before her shoulders sagged alongside her mood dropping just a smidge, her little blonde ahoge drooping on cue. “…Eugh… Which I don’t have…”

You reached for the pencil case settled on your desk neatly, the quiet sounds of pencils and pens rustling against soft fabric seemed to wake Cissia from her saddened state. Just a little.

Eventually, you managed to fish out a cute pen— a light pink base adorned with a cute, smiling bear charm attached to the clicker shaft. It’s simple, but it gets the job done.

And the moment Cissia’s eyes locked onto that cute pen in your gentle grip?!?!

It was over.

Without her noticing, Cissia let out a scandalized gasp upon your gracious offer, her eyes going wide as saucers at your generosity of not just accepting her urgent favor, but by also letting her borrow an adorable pen?!

God you were her life saver.

“Oh my god?!?!?!” She squealed before snatching the adorable pen with shaky hands, thrumming with unbridled elation. You swore you saw her slit pupils shift into sparkling hearts upon seeing the pen, her genuine giddiness was enough to elicit a tiny smile from you in kind. “This is so adorable!?? And to think you were hiding this from me should be considered a crime!!”

She tucked the pen into the small pouch in front of her bag, where the seams were fighting for dear life to remain attached to the main zipper, the shoulder straps looking close to mangled from whatever adventure Cissia participated in.

It was a surprise her bookbag survived all her 4 years, not that she had much of a choice anyway.

“Whatever the case may be,” Cissia marveled, already fantasizing on how smooth gliding the pen would feel the moment it touched her notebook paper. Just thinking about it made her fingertips steep like a madwoman. “I’ll expunge your past crimes!!! Yes yes yes.. I’ll look the other way and pretend like I did not see a thing! Isn’t that great?”

“Right.”

“Mhm mhm!” She wrapped her arm around your mildly tense shoulders, as though unable to handle Cissia’s boisterous behaviour during a dull physics class at 8 in the morning. As much as she was a loveable dork at times, there were sometimes where you wished she knew when to keep it on the down low…

Sometimes.

“Just as I thought, gosh… you’re so good to lil ol’ me ya know?!”

A drawn out sigh slipped past your lips as a defense mechanism against Cissia’s whims, already getting swept up with the thundering and chaotic blur of chattiness and wit your seatmate possessed. The sheer thought of it gave you a headache. “Just make sure to give it back before the end of the day today, okay?”

“Alrighty then~!”

—

Slowly, yesterday blurred into today and still— no signs of Cissia ever giving your pen back.

Had it not been for her being your seatmate, you would’ve been under the assumption that she so happened to lose it. Which still isn’t the best outcome by default, but it’d be slightly understandable as to why she hadn’t returned it to you in the first place.

However.

Your eyes ‘accidently’ glance at her hands to assure yourself that yes, she still has it. Only to see her grip onto your stylized pen like her life depends on it. Sketching random.. Doodles? Doodles of her and that white snake of hers munching on deviled eggs? At the corner of her notebook paper with a frenzy you didn’t know she possessed in the middle of history class, to then conveniently switch into ‘writing mode’ whenever the professor passed by with a critical eye.

That Cissia sure is a tacky one.

Fueled by your desire to put an end to the lack of communication between you two, you lightly tap her shoulder, causing the snake thiren to let out a quiet squeak upon your sudden presence.

Uh oh.

“So uh… Cissia?”

“Hmm oh...! Uh.. yes?” She clears her throat awkwardly, shrinking slightly in her seat as though she already knew what the conversation was about. God how I hate confrontation. “Is it what I think it is? She glances side to side, making sure no pesky student was around to eavesdrop in their little conversation before leaning in, eyes narrowing slightly. No one's paying attention. Perfect!

She grips the edge of her seat tightly, clammy hands fighting to simply get up and make a run for it. “So…” You begin, trying your best to sound as calm and punctual as humanly possible, all while trying to aim and put a direct end to Cissia’s skulking tendencies. “Cissia. . . where’s my pen?”

Oh it’s so wraps.

Cissia was about to answer with a weak excuse, but your innate ability to communicate your mild disappointment seemed to silence her. Forcing her to listen. “It’s been more than a day and you have yet to give it back,” You gesture to your pen being held captive in her iron-like grip. Unamused. “I’m not annoyed, all I want is answers.”

Cissia clears her throat, feeling her stomach drop at the sound of your slightly accusatory voice being directed at her. She swears on Chalky’s life that she did NOT mean to steal your pen!

“Uhhhhhh? Your pen?” She scrambles, eyes visibly darting left to right in a poor attempt to look for a visible out— and out from the truth slowly closing in on her mercilessly. I’m so toast… “So uh…” You narrow your eyes, watching her clearly clutch your favorite pen behind her back, the one with a cute, smiling bear charm attached to the clicker shaft.

The same one that you let her borrow two days ago.

“What pen?? I know nothing about your favorite pen!! Must’ve been the wind ya know??”

“The wind, you say.”

“Hah… Ha.. ha.. yeah..” You press your lips in a tight, taut line, fighting the urge to throw your hands up in the air and express your annoyance beginning to bubble within your veins. “…And… you’re being serious?” Cissia nods her head slowly, looking more and more like a child being scolded by their parents rather than a proper fourth year in university. Her scaly tail coils around her leg in a pitiful attempt to soothe herself. “Mhm… uhm…—”

A lump in Cissia’s throat began to form the more she was under your scrutinizing gaze, there was absolutely no way she could charm her way out of this one. “…It’s…” She steeples her fingers once more, trying her best to appear a teensy bit sure of herself even when under your scrutiny.

“..The real reason is kinda… kinda dumb… maybe a bit selfish— no,” She straightens her posture. “Not a bit.. But incredibly selfish of me.. And I didn’t want to say anything in fear of you potentially disliking me,”

She took a major deep breath she didn’t know she held captive in her lungs, allowing her erratic heartbeat to slow just a tad. Her tone taking on a more quieter and vulnerable approach. “But I think I totaled that plan with my combined idiocy and cowardice… Hah... How ironic..."

“But I'm being for real!! I didn’t give back your pen because…” She shifts in her seat uncomfortably. “The moment the pen even touched my notebook paper?? I grew instantly attached to it, attached to it to a fault to the point of embarrassment!”

Finally, she looks at you in the eyes. Trying her best to face the very thing she was deathly afraid of: confrontation. “I had so much fun writing away to my heart's content, doodling little egg shaped hearts of me and Chalky enjoying the spoils of our shared labor after 8 grueling hours of pure hell!”

“I’ll never forget how it glides on my notebook paper with ease,” She lifts the stylized pen within eyeshot, marveling at it with a rare warmth that makes your heart skip a beat at how pure the sight is. “Kind of like an ice skater gliding around an ice rink without a care in the world, like no burden will be heavy enough to weigh them down and prevent them from giving an enchanting performance.”

“And the cute charm…” She says with a weak laugh. “Its smile reminds me of yours— so full of life and serenity— I can’t help but feel like everything is going to be okay,” She mumbles under her breath, her words almost hard to decipher, feeling as though she had to force her vocal chords to be in tune with her heart. “I feel… calmer whenever we take those stupid tests that determine whether or not we’re going to make it in that messed up world of ours.”

“It’s funny,” She gives a weak smile, her eyes crinkling. “I’ve never said these words to anything, or anyone for that matter. I never gave feelings such as these with much attention and care, not until I had the privilege to hold such a cute pen!”

Now that changes things. You think, seeing Cissia’s apologetic gaze glance between your slight frown and to the bear charm— her thumb caressing the charm with a gentleness that rivaled her typical haste.

Your eyes began to soften up a bit without your consent, just the mere sight of Cissia acting vulnerable?? That was rarer than her actually arriving to class on time! However, even if the snake thiren can clearly see you begin to lower your defenses, she didn’t seize the opportunity to weasel her way out of this predicament with mere charm alone.

No, not when you so graciously helped her out when she needed it the most. The guilt chipping away at her typical bravado was more than enough for her to give into her remorse and try to absolve herself of her cowardly ways.

“And when yesterday came?? I really didn’t want to give your cute pen back,” she admits, twirling the pen between her thumb and pointer absentmindedly. “I know, I know how horrendously selfish that sounds… but it’s the truth.. And—” She sighs. “You asked for the truth and it’s only fair I give it to you.”

Placing a gentle hand on top of Cissia’s shoulder elicits a breathless gasp to escape your seatmate’s lips. Will they understand?? “Your words are…” An awkward cough left your lips, unable to come face to face with Cissia’s sincerity. To which she only smiled softly, not even bothering to tease you when all the ammunition was there for her to use for her own amusement. “…Sweet. Unexpected for sure, even I don’t know what to say.”

“I must admit that I’m a bit baffled that a single pen was enough to trigger all these warm and positive feelings,” You gave her gentle shoulder a gentle squeeze, serving as a gentle ‘I'm not mad at you,’ to which Cissia leaned into your comforting touch without meaning to. Like a plant leaning towards the sun. “But seeing as though you’re putting my pen in better use than I ever will.”

With your free hand, you gently push the pen into her hold, grasping her sharp manicured nails and curling them on top of the pen— now in a fist-like grip around the stylized pen that was once yours.

“Keep it, it’s yours now.” You nod, smiling. “I trust that it’s in good hands.”

Cissia’s breath hitches.

Trust.

She likes the sound of that word, even more when paired with that smile of yours.

But even so, she couldn’t lower her guard. There’s no way they’re giving this to me willy-nilly… it all has to be some part of a ruse to get back at me, right?

… right??

Yet no matter how long Cissia stares at you with wide eyes, searching for any malice or deception within your gaze, only to be sorely mistaken when patience and understanding stared right back at her.

Now it was Cissia’s turn to be taken aback.

She shifts in her seat once more, not because she was overly anxious like she was before— no, something a bit more complex than that.

Giddiness?

The feeling of mutual camaraderie?

Whatever it was, she was left intrigued with whatever this feeling was. This feeling that came when she was on the receiving end of your unconditional kindness and understanding, the feeling of being seen without ever having to over explain yourself.

Maybe attending class wouldn’t be too unbearable, not whenever you’re concerned.

. . . a/n: i FINALLYYYY wrote for a zzz woman lets go!??! first zzz woman appearance on my blog??! and the fact that it's cissia makes it extra special bc she's literally my goat </3 like that's literally my twin + and yes !! academic diaries is gonna be a mini series (?) in a way. they're not all connected to each other, moreso that all the zzz characters are in the same university and you deal with whatever shenanigans fits best with their character! (kinda like the retail woes mini series i have going on with hsr lmaoo) anyways heufheuhefa i had fun writing this as always and i meant to write this as a short oneshot.. aka... 500 words... uhm.. but ... the ideas were ideaing and the flowstate was SO good i actually held in my pee because i KNOW if i stood up and went to the bathroom I would've lost my flowstate and then you wouldn't see another oneshot for a few weeks !! (dw the moment i finished writing this i basically BOLTED to the bathroom ok!!) more revisions incoming... </3 + it's 4 am yet again oh my god my sleeping schedule </3 it's actually wraps bro omg ok lemme sleep shnoook mimimimimi

man thjis is reminding me to write AND post that zzz world cup headcanons ugdjsjss

I can imagine him critiquing the SHITTT out of the script handed to him and i know ppl around him would roll their eyes but he literally doesn't care 💔💔💔💔 he's in it for the arts 💔💔💔💔

oehsksiwkwkw i will write about it usjsoshdksskskss i have a literal outline for him 💔💔💔 watch out for me when i post it eventually 💔💔💔 thats NOT a threat 💔💔💔💔 rhats a PROMISE 💔💔💔 AND OAHDKSJEE THE HARUMASA BIRTHDAY THING I NEED TO START IT HJELPP 😭😭😭😭😭 god forbid a girl has ideas 😭😭😭

00:00 station 1 ! --- zenless zone zero !

♡ . . . fics . . . ♡ ⤷ ♡ the woes of a computer whiz! --- wise x reader ⤷ ♡ (wip) a sweltering summer! --- hugo x reader ⤷ ♡ hugo being a (loving) ragebaiter towards his lover <3 --- hugo x reader ⤷ ♡ (wip) unrelenting affection ♡ --- hugo x reader

⤷ ♡ academic diaries: sharing is NOT caring (not if it's with you) --- cissia x reader ⤷ ♡ a photo only looks good if the muse is loved by the photographer --- (harumasa x reader) ♡ . . . headcanons . . . ♡ ⤷ ♡ asaba harumasa headcanons: school au ⤷ ♡ hugo vlad headcanons: idol au ⤷ ♡ hugo vlad headcanons: school au ♡ . . . fics + headcanons . . . ♡ ⤷ ♡ insect mayhem ! ! ! --- multiple characters (hugo, harumasa, severian & seth) x reader

00:00 station 2 ! --- honkai: star rail !

♡ . . . fics . . . ♡ ⤷ ♡ [1] retail woes: 3 am rendezvous ! --- caelus x reader ⤷ ♡ [2] retail woes: nurse phainon saves the day ! --- phainon x reader ⤷ ♡ nonchalant boyfriend creature --- caelus x reader ⤷ ♡ (wip) caelus being a silly loser (lovingly) --- caelus x reader ♡ . . . headcanons . . . ♡ ~ tba ~ ♡ . . . fics + headcanons . . . ♡ ~ tba ~

00:00 last stop ! --- thank you so much for visiting!