Malvie

First a wee disclaimer, I absolutely loved the movie. There was so much that was amazing especially the actors, music, costuming and set design... but equally there was so much stupid that at times it seemed like watching a riverdale episode

Any previous reference or hint to Hades being Mal’s dad would’ve been great. The whole dynamic while awesome was pretty left field

On that... why does she go from not caring about him and barely knowing him basically HER WHOLE LIFE, to having the isle answer to a loving parent and a good dynamic between them? With no real resolution to the past 16 years of abandonment..?

What happened to Lizard Malificent?

What happened to the other VKs parents? End of the first film we had Cruella, Jafar and the Evil Queen dramatically staring out over Auradon... then nothing? A throwaway comment in the second film that they don’t want to run into their parents while back on the isle?

Where’s Lonnie?

If the septer is the most powerful object, or even the ember being the most powerful, why didn’t they take one of those in the first film and drop the barrier immediately? Why bother with the wand at all?

Where did Bens beard and fangs go? Why were they still there if they were gunna disappear again?

Why didn’t Jane just go about soaking everyone asleep and turned to stone with the enchanted water?

Mals idea to close off the barrier for good was the most wildly out of character thing... like why the fuck would she care about Auradon? Wasn’t the 2nd film all about her feeling so restricted by their shit and wanting to go home? Now she’s choosing Auradon over all the suffering children on the isle? What the actual fuck?

Dougs ponytail

On that why did Hades try to escape in the first place? Then not really be brothered any other time the crosses the barrier

What happened to him draining some of Mals power?

Couldn’t Evie have woken Dizzy with a kiss? She says she loves her like a little sister... Frozen anyone?

Why did they pick some of the only kids with actual good supportive parents?? Not the abused sad kids in rags they’d alluded to? Like look at Smee with the twins he’s so sweet with them! And Celia and her dad clearly have a different relationship to Jay and his, in terms of duping others and getting the best deal for yourself

dougs ponytail

Why didn’t Audrey face any repercussions?

Why didn’t they think to make the museum more secure after the last time random kids broke into it?

How did they get from the isle back to Auradon after the bikes were crashed? Did they get held over the water in Umas tenticals? Did they ride Mal like a big ol’ dragon bus?

DOUGS PONYTAIL

Why did the core 4 seem so out of character and out of touch with how crazy different Auradon is? Like when Gils tries actual fresh fruit for the first time! Isn’t it meant to’ve only been a few months since they came over?

All 3 movies are one school year right? That’s dumb

Seriously why was everyone so out of character? The start of the film they’re running about the isle singing and getting praised for BESTOWING BASIC HUMAN RIGHTS on their own fucking people

Why’s there’s no explanation for most of Mals power (bar the ember) being Fae not Demigod? Would that not be at least equal power?

THE FUCKING BARRIERS DOWN ARE YOU KIDDING ME?

Why not just bring the kids over?

Or get an actual judicial system in place?

Or provide fresh food, medical supplies, sanitary products, contraceptives yanno BASIC HUMAN RESOURCES to the isle? provide the guards to ensure it’s not taken and horded by a single gang