All the Stars in Texas

I hate cigarettes so much I hate that smoking is becoming cool again I hate that we're becoming contrarian hipsters about this disgusting habit that has literally killed so many people and destroyed so many lives I'm so serious we need to become absolute killjoys about this again it's time to go 90s scolds on cigarettes until the scourge is wiped out entirely.

Genuinely I just don't think people younger than 35 know how good they have it. I distinctly remember the year in my childhood that it became illegal to smoke in restaurants, I remember what it was like when people used to smoke indoors everywhere, you all think it's cool because it's this illicit fun thing people are doing drunk outside bars now, you don't remember what it was like when fucking everything reeked all the time and you couldn't get away from it and how life changing it was when you could suddenly go out to eat and everything didn't taste like ash and all your clothes and hair didn't stink for days when you got home.

Schism? Schism today?

Wow, I didn't have "catholic schism" on my 2026 bingo card

You would kick the Pope like the football? Jail! Jail for separatists for one thousand years!

I firmly believe what ever you’re obsessed with at 11/12 years old becomes a core part of who you are, regardless if you lose interest in it or not. Maybe some of you were lucky and were obsessed with warrior cats or smth, and if you’re real unlucky it was probably twilight.

I'm instituting a new policy of "if I can't easily read your crusty scanned PDF then I'm sending it back to you, telling you to get your shit together and save your .docx as .pdf, and causing snakes to manifest inside your house"

this but also if you are in accounting and you have an Excel file please do not save it as a PDF or take a screenshot of it and then paste it into another Excel file

I take it back whatever you have going on is way worse than what I was dealing with holy shit

yeah no this is a real thing an actual human being said to me

never be good at your job. it's a trap. they'll just give you more and harder stuff to do and it'll pull you away from your true passion of writing gay fanfiction for people on the internet

Somebody in a Twitch stream chat was trying to insult a streamer by saying, "You're almost 40, and you've only gotten a tarot card reading once?" And I don't know, I'm still amused by this. I'm in my late 20s and I've also only had a tarot card reading once. One of those ones on the street you pay for. The guy doing my tarot card reading was like, "You're going to join the military," or something like that, and 15 year old me thought to myself, "Okay, well that's not true. So I guess I just got scammed," and then I just never got a tarot card reading since then.

(military recruiter tarot card reader in august of 2001) *draws The Tower* *draws a second The Tower* now that's not supposed to happen

If I’m loaning someone a couple hundred, we can discuss repayment, but my husband is adamant that money to friends and family is only ever supposed to be a gift. And he’s right. I’ve gifted thousands to friends and family, and I expect zero return. It’s my money to give and I have the privilege and luxury to give it!

Similar though somewhat more cynical motto I was always taught was never to loan money that you wouldn't be willing to gift to that person. Lots of loans aren't repaid and lots of relationships end over it, but if that money was more important than the relationship to you, then you shouldn't have been loaning it to begin with.

am i allowed to say kill all trillionaires or is that too specific of a threat