like the sun we will live to rise

Soo.. [Okay, what was he going to say, again? He forgot all the things he had made up in his mind. Perfect, he thought. He had to think again to find right words to explain his feelings. But it was hard, harder than all of his exams. That was the moment that he realized not everything was about exams, and that was the moment that he realized if he took out the studies, nothing was left. Except, Lorcan. There was two things that described him perfectly. Being clever and Lorcan. That was all about him.] You must have already realized this if you are not stupid but.. Well, I know I’m always teasing you, but I never said what I feel about you properly. We’ve been friends since like from the beginning and honestly I have no idea that what would I do without you. You are my best friend, but not just best friend. You are special to me, apart from everyone. I have this weird feeling when I’m around you. And I always tried to cover it with teasing you. I realized that was so stupid, I thought it would destroy our friendship if I told you this. But nothing can destroy it. If you don’t feel the way I feel about you, that is okay. We’ll just pretend that this talk is never happened. But if  it is the other way around, I can tell you rightly that I love you. [That was crazy, he was even sure that he blushed, feeling already ashamed was bad for him. And waiting Lorcan’s answer, it was deathlike. But on the other side, he felt relieved. There was no hiding things anymore. At least, Lorcan would know how Louis felt about him. Not taking his eyes away, Louis kept looking at Lorcan straightly. Analyzing his mimics to understand what Lorcan was thinking.]

[Lorcan’s heart felt heavy as he saw Louis putting on his serious face for the first time after a long time. Lorcan straightened up a bit as what he would be hearing soon was probably a big deal, he wanted to make sure he was ready for whatever it was. He didn’t want to think of someone having been hurt, that would cause him to shake, that was the last thing he needed. He thought he should choose being optimistic this time, he took a deep breath then he felt ready.]  I – I don’t quite understand. [He stopped for a minute to process all these things Louis said. Yes, he wasn’t stupid, he was aware of all the flirting of Louis’, but that never meant something exclusive to him, it was Louis, he’d pretty much flirt with anyone he liked. He was taken aback but somehow, he believed him. He could sense it from the intense look in Louis’ eyes, that look wasn’t something Lorcan often witnessed to yet he could recognize it easily. He had no idea what to feel let alone what to say. But as he saw Louis growing impatient and anxious, he just felt obliged to say something to free him from the pain.] You see, I wasn’t expecting this at all. You are quite a joker so that just might be one of your plays. But I don’t think so, do you know why? Because, If this wasn’t the truth and you wanted to fool me, you would have done it years ago, I know you would. And, as for how I feel about you, it is complicated. It really is. I’ve never felt these things towards anyone other than you so I’m not sure what to call them. These are new feelings for me that I’m still trying to get used to. I suppose that applies to both of us. [Lorcan had difficulty in grasping the fact that this was actually happening. He felt like he said too much so he thought it’d be better if he took a break, let the words sink in.]

I feel I should have focussed a lot more on my studying this week, but let’s be honest here: who has the focus - except for maybe the Ravenclaws) to do nothing but studying for an entire week? It actually helps you with studing if you take a few breaks every now and then.

A whole week of neglecting studying seems a lot for times like these but it’s not something you can’t compensate for. -The focusing part is right but come on, studying isn’t the only thing we do-

Lorcan, if that were a dragon, I wouldn’t be so calm. It’s Nutella, stacks of it, and that guy isn’t sharing!

Oh... You didn’t seem calm to me, I thought you were pretty excited. Well now, that sucks because I think I need to lower my expectations from now on. I’m sorry he doesn’t share, he probably only shares for his own interest so maybe you should offer him an exchange?

louisrav:

[Lorcan was clueless, well that wasn’t something Louis hadn’t expected. As they were walking to the lake, Louis wanted to break the silence and talk about something else in the meantime. It took him for a minute to find something to speak of.] So this is what you are doing when I’m not around? Creepy stalker. [He smirked a little, he was aware of that Lorcan got scared when he saw him with his book. Making fun of it wasn’t in the plan, but Louis couldn’t keep himself.] Just for the record, I don’t have a diary or something like that. If you want to stalk me, just talk with me. I know I’m irresistible but stalking is not nice.

[They were both walking to the lake with their heads down, quietly. Lorcan couldn’t comprehend the fact that Louis looked tense, he wasn’t guilty, Lorcan was, so what was that all about? But, then a few awkward minutes later Louis started talking and Lorcan was determined to face the accusation.] No. That was the first time I had ever laid hands on one of your books. And I had no intention of stalking. [Lorcan’s face was still. Though, he was burning up inside while cursing himself even for getting near the bookshelf. He regretted seeing the golden covered book and taking it, what if it was something personal? What if that was the reason why Louis had always kept it only for himself?] Well, I’m sorry but again I’m not a stalker or anything. I highly doubt you don’t have a diary, blogger boy.

[Realizing that he was holding his book, Louis squinted at him. It was kind of funny to catch him like that. If he didn’t have a super important thing to talk about, he would definitely make fun of that, but it wasn’t the right time. He cleared his throat and looked at him once again.] Can we go somewhere else? It’s kind of important. [Well, It was very important indeed. Before coming there, Louis felt so confident about saying things he had been feeling. But being in front of him and knowing the fact that they’d start a conversation about it, he was already willing to cancel it and keep the things like how they used to be.But it was too late. Trying to remind the possibilities, he started to talk again.] We can go to the lake or wherever you want. I don’t know. 

[Lorcan looked away, then a few seconds later he decided that was quite weird so he turnt to Louis again. He was sure Louis had seen the book, but he didn’t punch Lorcan in the face so he got a bit confused by this unforeseen inaction of Louis’. Could they go somewhere else?  Did that have something to do with the punching part? Lorcan wasn’t sure but he nodded.]  We can go, wherever you are comfortable at. Yeah, I see. [Of course it was important, Lorcan was holding one of the dearest books of his, Lorcan decided he’d bear the consequences regardless.] Lake sounds good, It’s cool.

Unsaid || f2f: Lorcis

[It was crazy how easily Lorcan could get bored when Louis was not around. When he was out, Lorcan could find nothing to do and he would just sit on his bunk and stare at blank walls. That was creepy for him, wasting his time, so later on he’d find a book and curl up somewhere with the relief of finding a companion. Today was no different for Lorcan, except the book he picked was not his, he borrowed it, even though the owner hadn’t permitted him to do so. Lorcan would never do such thing, if the book wasn’t Louis’. He felt a little guilty but he was curious because Louis always had held his books sacred and hardly ever lent them to anyone. Lorcan slowly walked to Louis’ corner and gazed at the bookshelf, a shimmery golden covered book caught his eye, he got the book without hesitation. When he was making his way back to his bunk, he heard the door squeaking and then he froze when he saw it was Louis. He couldn’t even hide the book, but Louis didn’t seem to care at all with that determined look on his face. He started talking with the first step he took.] Oh, we, uh – we can talk, I guess.

You will be mine…

Is...Is that what I think it is? A dragon? Hugo, what do your elf eyes see? 

Oh, only since the end of second year. We’re not really, I was kidding. Uh, there was a little bit of complication due to some, uh, student-mentor relationships. I’m prepared to wait until I’m graduated and not get him sent to Azkaban. Thanks for the lookout though, Lorc.

I see now, oh... He’d be sent to Azkaban for that? Poor Professor Rogers, I can’t imagine him in there. Good thinking, Kits. Waiting seems reasonable. You’re very welcome.

Well, people shouldn’t think of you that way. You’re not boring…just not doing that much. I mean at least you’re not acting like McClaggen so I prefer you the way you are. I WILL NOT CHILL IF PEOPLE DISRESPECT BABY SCAMANDER.

I can’t change what they think of me but maybe they could try not to think that out loud, or maybe I can try to change their mind, I still have 2 solid years in Hogwarts. AND I ACCEPT YOU WITH YOUR ‘’NO CHILL’’ ATTITUDE, still so lovely of you.

If we’re allowed to date teachers now, I’m really wondering why Professor Rogers still won’t give me the time of day. I can show him a whole new world that didn’t exist when he was a Capsicle.

Sounds like you’ve been plotting this for a long, long time. And how are we allowed to date teachers? Like are they allowed to date students, too?  Sorry, Kit. That just sounds a little messed up. 

I know you miss me Lorc, but don’t worry no more going to library early in the morning. And god, I must admit that ignoring people and just study for a long time was the worse decision I’ve ever made. 

You know nothing, Louis Weasley. Come on, that was not the first time you’ve made that decision, you ignore people in order to study a lot. Maybe you just don’t realize it, but unfortunately, you’re no different than me.

One of the ravenclaw students saw me at  Quidditch Pitch today, she acted like she had seen Joker or something. Yes I’m still alive and I’m back, hows everyone doing?

It’s about time. Everyone’s been asking me about you like I had any idea- you wake up and disappear so early that I don’t even think you come to the dorms to sleep. Mental. Just mental.