My mind

Another begining addiction of mine - alcohol. Or more specific beer. I live in Czech republic where beer is national drink so if you want to have fun, there has to be beer present. Of course, we don't stay at just a beer, but we drink rum, vodka or plum brandy. Here in Slavic states it's always stronger tho, so it's normal to drink the whole bottle of plum brandy in one night, in some regions, even two.

I live at the dorms where if you come drink and they will find out, you can be expelled from the dorms and school. Here it's two strikes and you go. I have none so far and have year left in school so I can risk a little, but still, I drink little so I can come and act like nothing happened. So far this strategy works, but if I get one strike, I'll be a lot more careful.

This post is probably shorter than usual. I'm writing this while drunk so hopefully it's making sense. Thank God for autocorrect.

Once more, do what you gotta do, have fun, but don't try your luck. It may not work forever

Still happy and broken.

As I was working on my personal projects, late at night as I always do (finishing around 2 to 3 am), I went to bed and started my night thinking (I have to clear my thoughts so I can sleep better). I started thinking about my way to the dorms tomorrow. While in the middle of that thought, I asked myself "should I buy cigarettes on my way? should I?". This got me thinking: "If I had a pack on me then I could give one to someone." (Almost everyone in my class that smoke gave me at least one.)

The second reason was that when you smoke with someone, I feel that it unlocks more social potencial. By that I mean that you can talk to them easier about stuff. (It seems to be that case for me at least.) I do it for the social values. Suddenly after that I got the weirdest feeling, not painful but definitely there. In my head I had thoughts like "Man, I could go for a smoke right now" I now know what any addict feels when they don't have have their thing. It's not very pleasant feeling, more on that later

Another addiction of mine and most of young population, computers, smart devices, technology. Just as it was 30 to 40 years ago with television, it's kinda the same with computers (mainly computer games for me). But after some time, it looses it magic. You simply don't feel joy out of these things you used to, mostly because of growing up and getting more possibilities in life. I used to play tons of games, now I play like 3 total and most of my time I focus on projects, programming, art and music. Yes, you could be doing something better than playing games and being on the computer all day, as parents like to say. I do spend a lot of time on the computer, as long as I have something to do or something to work on. When I don't, then I move to other projects like sketching and doing architecture (dunno how to use this word cuz I almost never hear it, but you get the point.)

If I do things, it's only because of my social value. Now don't start smoking out of the blue, I do it because in the place I live in, there's no other option to get by socially than smoke, drink and having a new girlfriend every week.

Do what you have to do.