OUTCASTS

“But Thor I don’t understand why..” Zoe’s voice is calm but clearly irritated, and she couldn’t stop fidgeting in her formalwear.

Thor cuts her off, “Zoe I don’t think we need to understand, Father never explained his decision to me. If I had to guess I think at the very least it’s to help build an alliance with Jotunheim,” he says firmly as they walk to the throne room.

Zoe scowls, “I’m not some pawn in father’s plans for peace with the realms, he should at the very least tell us what he’s planning. How do we know he isn’t some brute?”

Thor shakes his head, “regardless of father’s plans, I wouldn’t let him hurt you. I failed to protect you once, sister, I won’t do it again”

Zoe is silent as they finally walk into the throne room, she was grateful for her brother’s protection and he had taught her how to protect herself too. She just hated being forced into this, she wasn’t even given a chance to meet her betrothed until now, just days before the wedding. As she approaches the throne, her eyes are drawn to the group of Jotuns that were already there off to the side. Which was to be her husband? Her eyes are drawn immediately to a smaller one, still taller than her but shorter than the other giants. She can’t deny that he was handsome, her breath caught in her throat for just a moment, though she hides it well.

She doesn’t stare though, looking up to Odin at the throne as she curtsies, “Father,” she greets, bowing her head.

This story was entirely different than anything she'd expected and she has to stifle a shocked laugh a few times as Clint explains. But for some reason, the visual doesn't put her off as much as it usually would. She doesn't linger on the thought of it but the way Clint describes it, being between the door and Bucky, but for a moment...just a moment she can't help but picture it, and then other things. Then she shuts those thoughts down firmly and refocuses on the two of them trying to ignore the deep blush on her cheeks.

"Jesus...please tell me that you don't make it a habit to wind up in the ER everytime you guys...you know," she asks weakly, glancing between the two of them.

Neither Clint nor Bucky minded her laughing at the story.  It was a funny story and it’s why Clint had told it.  Bucky was always mortified when Clint proudly told it, but hearing those unintentional barks of laughter from Zoe when she was so stressed out being in the situation she was in right now, made it worth it.

“No.  Not always,” Bucky said.  “Though there was another time where I thought for a second we might.  Clint grew up in the circus, right?  So he likes to brag about how good he is at acrobatics, and he tried to hold this really weird position and - well - he couldn’t.  Screamed and said he broke his dick, but it was fine,” he said.

Clint barked out a laugh and covered his mouth.  “I swear, we aren’t usually totally awkward when we get busy.  Not that I can prove it to you or anything.   Normally we’re just super hot and mind blowing.  You know, the kind of shit they write in those books girls all like.  Like those ones about the hockey players.” 

Bucky chuckled. “Oh yeah, like the ‘girls’ read.  Right, Clint.  Like I haven’t seen you out on the fire escape pawing over one with a coffee in your hand.”  He looked at Zoe and then back at Clint. “And yeah?!  What the hell?  I’m not tiny!”  He reached over and smacked his leg.  “I can throw you about.”

“Trauma bonds are something else that’s for sure, I’ve seen it happen so many times with my crew. People start staying at the shelter and the amount of couples that get together in the first week of meeting..it’s hard to dissuade them because it is nice not to have to go through it all alone but it’s hardly the best thing to start a new relationship during such a stressful period,” Zoe reasons, before going pale.

Bucky chuckled. “Yeah.  I’m not sure kids think I’m particularly safe either,” he said. “But I’m glad your kids aren’t scared of you anymore.  That would have made keeping an eye out for them a lot tougher.” 

Clint nodded. “Oh yeah. That kind of adrenaline too, when you think you’re both about to die and then you don’t, it heightens feelings.  But I mean, I think we did good for a year.  It wasn’t even growing apart that really broke us up.  It was another trauma thing that we didn’t share and I think maybe after that we had trouble understanding the other’s point of view anymore.”  He shrugged. “Or we were young and dumb. It’s hard to say.”

This story was entirely different than anything she'd expected and she has to stifle a shocked laugh a few times as Clint explains. But for some reason, the visual doesn't put her off as much as it usually would. She doesn't linger on the thought of it but the way Clint describes it, being between the door and Bucky, but for a moment...just a moment she can't help but picture it, and then other things. Then she shuts those thoughts down firmly and refocuses on the two of them trying to ignore the deep blush on her cheeks.

"Jesus...please tell me that you don't make it a habit to wind up in the ER everytime you guys...you know," she asks weakly, glancing between the two of them.

"Andrew had to tell me to stop mean-mugging people without meaning to, the kids at my shelter used to be scared of me because of it," she admits before turning to Clint with surprise, "One day? Jesus...even in the movies that's fast, but I guess when you're in love..you're in love," she shrugs, knowing it wasn't as if she should judge anything, her own life decisions are questionable.

Bucky scowls at her, playing into the joke that he had a murder gaze. “What are you trying to say, Zoe?” he teased.

Bucky pushed him playfully. “You’re such an asshole,” he said. “Stop trying to scar her.”

He stifled a laugh and shook his head.  “Yeah.  I guess if you can work on not murder staring into space, I can too.” 

Clint nodded. “I mean, I would say it wasn’t the best decision I’ve ever made.  We just met in one of those intense moments, and I did the whole sacrifice play to save her life.  I guess we got trauma bonded or something.  And yeah, we were married by the next night.  It lasted a bit over a year before things started going south and then we had a bunch of therapy and fights and then we got divorced.  We are still friends though.  You hang around enough, you’ll meet her.” 

But nodded in agreement to Zoe’s next statement. “Yeah. I hate them too.  The smell of bleach and all the beeping.  Annoyingly this idiot seems to love them.  I’ve spent more time in hospitals with him since we got together, than I did over the entire time between escaping HYDRA and our first hook up.”

“Trauma bonds are something else that’s for sure, I’ve seen it happen so many times with my crew. People start staying at the shelter and the amount of couples that get together in the first week of meeting..it’s hard to dissuade them because it is nice not to have to go through it all alone but it’s hardly the best thing to start a new relationship during such a stressful period,” Zoe reasons, before going pale.

“That sounds like Katniss Everdeen’s symbol,” Clint said.  “And Tony already likes to call me Katniss.  I don’t need to add fuel to that particular fire.”  He hummed and shrugged. “I wear a chevron on my uniform. It could be a chevron.  Or a H. I have a really cool beanie with a H on it.” 

“I think it should just be a big target,” Bucky said. “It’d be his target on crime.” 

Bucky nodded in understanding.  “I did the same thing.  It was hard to believe people would like me.  And honestly, I don’t think a lot of people did, to start off with.  I didn’t think I was worthy of Steve’s friendship. But god, he’s persistent.”

"Andrew had to tell me to stop mean-mugging people without meaning to, the kids at my shelter used to be scared of me because of it," she admits before turning to Clint with surprise, "One day? Jesus...even in the movies that's fast, but I guess when you're in love..you're in love," she shrugs, knowing it wasn't as if she should judge anything, her own life decisions are questionable.

She grins at Clint, “I know, it feels like a high honor that he would get all deep with me, and I appreciate it. I just..” she looks down at her hands and sighs, “it’s more complicated than I know how to explain. But I won’t say I’ve written it off completely and I’m open to it happening honestly I’m just…pessimistic is all, I guess,” she admits before glancing up at them both with a faint smile. “I’m sure being friends with you two will be all kinds of inspiring, so who knows what could happen.”

Bucky nodded in understanding. “I get it.  Just as long as you don’t close off completely.  I mean - some people think there’s someone for everyone. I’m not sure that’s true.  I’ve been around a long time and sometimes people do end up spending their life alone, either because that’s what they want, or they just can’t find someone.  But you won’t find something if you shove away everyone who tries to get close. I can promise you that.”

Clint laughed.  “Yeah, tell me about it. Imagine if it wasn’t here.  We’d have to have run all the way back over to Brooklyn to get you help and that would have been crazy.” 

He nodded. “I get you though.  That’s kinda why I don’t work with the big team as much.  I think there are more of us wanting to just keep things safe on a smaller scale. Spider-Man likes that.  There’s Daredevil if you’ve ever heard of him.  A guy called Luke up in Harlem.  It’s hard saving the world with a bow and arrow, and I’ll step up when it’s needed, but it’s much easier keeping Bed-Stuy safe with a bow and arrow.” 

@lonelyxoutcasts | from here | accepting!

Steve looked around briefly as though he might see these so called stalkers hovering on the periphery of their space. Which was ridiculous, but a habit for a man who was rarely snuck up on. He wasn't used to stealth used against him, but this wasn't against him, was it?

"Any idea who it could be?" he asked Zoe, trying to focus his attention instead on the girl in front of him. "Or what they could possibly be after? Specifically now, or do you think this is interest in general?"

It didn't even occur to him to think about her fear being potentially untrue. Steve learned a long time ago to trust his own instinct as well as the instinct of those around him.

Bucky nodded in understanding.   “I mean, I get it.  Trust me.  I do.”  He took a deep breath and let it out slowly.  He didn’t talk about this stuff very often, and never with strangers.  But he liked Zoe, and he wanted her to know she was worth love too.  “I mean look at me.  Ex assassin full of trauma.  I tried datin’ one other person, and I love her, but we were terrible for each other.  I didn’t think I was worth being loved.  I didn’t think I’d ever find anyone who would get me or want to even try dating me.  I like being alone more than I like being around other people.  And then, I met Clint. It didn’t happen right away.  Not by a long shot.  But eventually I realized that I couldn’t just shut out the world based on what other people had done to me.”  He patted her hand. “You’re really awesome, you know?  Don’t write it off completely.” 

Clint grinned at Bucky.  “God, you better listen to him, Zo.  You know he’s serious when he gets all deep and existential,” Clint joked, trying to lighten the moment a little.

She grins at Clint, “I know, it feels like a high honor that he would get all deep with me, and I appreciate it. I just..” she looks down at her hands and sighs, “it’s more complicated than I know how to explain. But I won’t say I’ve written it off completely and I’m open to it happening honestly I’m just…pessimistic is all, I guess,” she admits before glancing up at them both with a faint smile. “I’m sure being friends with you two will be all kinds of inspiring, so who knows what could happen.”

“I’ve never dated really but seeing you two together is really sweet,” she says softly, laying back against her pillows, more prone to unfiltered honesty given her injured state and just the relief at making it out of that earlier fight.

Clint laughed. “Well, I can’t help that,” he said.  “I didn’t make the e silent.  But I assure you, it was there when I said it.”

Bucky covered his face as he started laughing. “Jesus Christ,” he said.  “I can’t take you anywhere.”

They both looked over at her at the admission.  “Really?” Clint asked. “I love being in relationships.  You should try it out sometime.  I mean -I get men suck - but sometimes you find a good one.  Look at the one I got.  What a catch, right?”

Bucky rolled his eyes but he couldn’t help but smile at the one.  “It’s hard to trust people,” he said. “I get it.  But it is worth it when you find someone you can.  Don’t write it off forever.” 

Her cheeks are flushed when he says he prefers blonde women, ignoring it stubbornly though because the last time she’d blushed they’d teased her for it and she didn’t want to acknowledge it and possibly embarrass herself again.

“I’ve never dated really but seeing you two together is really sweet,” she says softly, laying back against her pillows, more prone to unfiltered honesty given her injured state and just the relief at making it out of that earlier fight.

“But Thor I don’t understand why..” Zoe’s voice is calm but clearly irritated, and she couldn’t stop fidgeting in her formalwear.

Thor cuts her off, “Zoe I don’t think we need to understand, Father never explained his decision to me. If I had to guess I think at the very least it’s to help build an alliance with Jotunheim,” he says firmly as they walk to the throne room.

Zoe scowls, “I’m not some pawn in father’s plans for peace with the realms, he should at the very least tell us what he’s planning. How do we know he isn’t some brute?”

Thor shakes his head, “regardless of father’s plans, I wouldn’t let him hurt you. I failed to protect you once, sister, I won’t do it again”

Zoe is silent as they finally walk into the throne room, she was grateful for her brother’s protection and he had taught her how to protect herself too. She just hated being forced into this, she wasn’t even given a chance to meet her betrothed until now, just days before the wedding. As she approaches the throne, her eyes are drawn to the group of Jotuns that were already there off to the side. Which was to be her husband? Her eyes are drawn immediately to a smaller one, still taller than her but shorter than the other giants. She can’t deny that he was handsome, her breath caught in her throat for just a moment, though she hides it well.

She doesn’t stare though, looking up to Odin at the throne as she curtsies, “Father,” she greets, bowing her head.

The kiss came to a halt, though, as voices sounded behind them. His head whipped around, and he clocked a couple of housekeepers approaching the beach with two baskets in hand. They had halted in their approach, though, and seemed to be whispering between each other for a moment. The waves were just loud enough that he couldn't make out what they were saying, but he couldn't help but feel a little embarrassed.

It was just a little kiss, but... still. They were out in public, and Zoe was on his lap. Loki was more private by nature, so he couldn't help the flush that wrapped his cheeks. He quickly turned away from the two women, hoping to save face a little.

"I appreciate that but we can save the big guns for..I mean if the King Pins ever do try to do something or attack the shelter, then maybe you could call them. But having Captain America and..and who else? Did you say Spiderman? And whoever else, that seems fine right now, at least until we know there's something to worry about," she reasons, before blinking at Clint, he sure did have an extensive dating history.

Clint nudges her. “Hey don’t you start too,” he said, playfully. “Getting ganged up on by everyone.  That’s not fair.”

Clint chuckled.  “Spider-man not Spiderman like it’s a last name.  He’d kick your ass if he heard you say it like that,” he teased.  “I think you’re right though.  I mean, Cap on his own is usually enough to make old Willy pause and rethink things.  And he’s a Brooklyn boy too, so he doesn’t have to go far to come keep an eye on things.  It’ll be okay.”

Bucky choked when Zoe called Clint slutty.

“Hey now, I don’t discriminate,” Clint said. “My ex-wife was blonde.  So maybe Blondes are my favorite,” he said. 

“Hey!” Bucky said.

“Blonde women, Bucky,” Clint said. “Brunet guys are my most favorite.  You have to listen for the e at the end.  I know it’s silent, but it’s important as a gender identifier.”

Her cheeks are flushed when he says he prefers blonde women, ignoring it stubbornly though because the last time she’d blushed they’d teased her for it and she didn’t want to acknowledge it and possibly embarrass herself again.

She nods absently as he explains how the med staff here couldn’t look at his arm and just leans back on the bed, half leaning on Clint too. She finds herself wishing Bucky could sit with them too. Sue her, she felt safer between them, and this unknown tower surrounded by strangers and medical staff was tripping her anxiety.

Bucky smiled softly and nodded.  He didn’t normally like admitting something like that. HYRDA had done a real number on him, and admitting that it both had changed his ability to accept love and his self esteem made him feel weak, which was wholly contradictory to the feelings of weakness he felt for needing it in the first place.  But there was something about the way Zoe had pointed it out that just made him love Clint a little more for being as annoyingly persistent as he was.  It made his affection grow for Zoe too.  The fact she could read him so easily was impressive.

“Key word, annoying,” Bucky said.

“You old grump,” Clint teased. “You love it.” 

Clint tapped Zoe’s leg. “Hey, Zo,” he said.  “You need to stay awake.  Eyes open, okay?” 

Bucky nodded.  “Andrew knows you got hurt and what happened.  He knows that he needs to keep an eye out for the Kingpin’s crew and to make sure the kids stay out of trouble.  And he knows I’d be sending friends, but not which ones.  I called him before I called my friends.  I’m really thinking about calling in some big guns.  You know?  I bet none of the King Pins guys will want to face a Hulk.  But the Hulk… I dunno if that’s a good idea.  Maybe Jennifer?  I don’t know her so well though.” 

“I know, Jen,” Clint said. “We had a thing for a bit.”

“What?!” Bucky said. “How the fuck…? Jesus, are there any women superheroes you haven’t banged?”

"I appreciate that but we can save the big guns for..I mean if the King Pins ever do try to do something or attack the shelter, then maybe you could call them. But having Captain America and..and who else? Did you say Spiderman? And whoever else, that seems fine right now, at least until we know there's something to worry about," she reasons, before blinking at Clint, he sure did have an extensive dating history.

She refocuses when Clint confirms they’re still a team and she smiles gratefully up at him. She can’t understand why it was so important to her but she was glad to know they still valued her and wanted them to be a little trio. She nudges him lightly, he was on the side of the bed that didn’t have her IV, “oh yeah I can definitely imagine you having smartass shit to say to people when you fight, I bet you’re a regular comedian,” she teased, before looking back to Bucky when he mentions being hurt.

Bucky chuckled.  “Oh yeah.  He’s got a big mouth alright.  He used to annoy the absolute shit out of me.  One time he wanted to question some guy without me there so he sent me off to buy him a chocolate milk and then got annoyed when I couldn’t find one.” 

“Water’s not the same thing as chocolate milk, Buck,” Clint said.  “But I won you over right?  You love me now.” 

“Yeah, you really dug your way in there.  You’re a regular heart worm, birdy,” he said.

She nods absently as he explains how the med staff here couldn’t look at his arm and just leans back on the bed, half leaning on Clint too. She finds herself wishing Bucky could sit with them too. Sue her, she felt safer between them, and this unknown tower surrounded by strangers and medical staff was tripping her anxiety.

“Thanks, Short Stuff,” Clint teased as he squeezed into the side of the bed beside her.  “Of course we’re still a team.  If I got kicked off teams every time I mouthed off at a bad guy and ended up getting hurt, there wouldn’t be any teams left that would take me.  I’m an absolute sucker for doing it when I’m captured and being tortured.  I seriously can’t keep my mouth shut.  It’s like I’ve always got something to prove.  One time, HYDRA had me and…” 

“Alright, Clint, let’s not traumatize her more right now, okay?” Bucky said.  “You can save that story for another time.” 

“Fine,” Clint huffed.  “But my point stands.  We’re still a team and teams stick together.” “Fisk is erratic.  We couldn’t have known what would work best.  I thought it being daytime with his staff there he’d hold back. Or at least he’d go after me.  He fuckin’ hates me.  You’re not to blame,” Bucky added. “And for the record.  He did get me too.”  He lifted his shirt up at the side revealing a nasty bruise that was forming on his ribs. It had already started to turn purple.  “He really wrenched my shoulder too which already has issues.  But that’s the game right?  You gotta expect these things to happen when you’re fighting for something important.” 

She refocuses when Clint confirms they’re still a team and she smiles gratefully up at him. She can’t understand why it was so important to her but she was glad to know they still valued her and wanted them to be a little trio. She nudges him lightly, he was on the side of the bed that didn’t have her IV, “oh yeah I can definitely imagine you having smartass shit to say to people when you fight, I bet you’re a regular comedian,” she teased, before looking back to Bucky when he mentions being hurt.

She squeezes Bucky hand gratefully when he offers to let her stay. Sure there would be issues she’d have to deal with if she did stay there, because her PTSD and trauma was harder to hide when in close quarters especially if they were going to look after her for two weeks. But anything would be better than staying here in this medical facility.

She looks up at the doctor, “deal, deal, deal I’ll follow all the rules and..and do whatever I need to. I can’t stay here but..but I’ll stay with them, as long as I need to,” she promises softly.

The doctor looks less than convinced but nods slowly, “okay..well I’ll leave you to get settled for a while and a medic will check on you in half an hour, alright? Don’t get too worked up, try not to,” she says gently before setting her chart down and leaving the three of them alone.

Bucky is relieved that the doctor accepts the deal, even with the attached terms.  It was going to be a pain in the ass coming in and out of the city while they needed to prepare for Fisk’s retaliation, but they could handle it. 

“Thanks, doc,” Clint said.  “We’ll make sure she behaves.”

When they’re left alone, Bucky pulls over a chair and sits down.  “You’re no hassle, darlin’,” he said. “We’re a team, remember.  And a team takes care of each other.  You know that.  You do that all the time.”

Clint nodded in agreement.  “That’s right. And don’t worry.  I have a two bedroom apartment.  My friends Nat and Katie are always staying over.  You’ll have your own space.  We can use the time to come up with a plan to fight back against Fisk.  We can get pizza and a big white board and everything.”

Zoe was laughing to Clint softly, too tired to move but he made her laugh anyway, “trust me bird boy, I’ve got enough scars I don’t need a head scar to tell the world about my stupidity too,” she chuckles.

“Zoe, right? I’m sorry, your wound didn’t seem to cause any permanent damage but it does look as if you have a concussion and we need to keep you in observation to make sure it doesn’t cause any further injury or damage to your brain,” the doctor says quietly, coming to her bedside to look over the stitches and nodding, they looked good enough.

Zoe looks alarmed, trying to sit up more, “wait observation? How long would..”

“We would need you to stay at least a few days, if not a week,” she says absently before noticing the way Zoe’s leg was bruised, “is your leg hurting still? It may need to be checked out too,” she observes and Zoe shakes her head frantically, wincing because holy shit that hurt more than anything.

Clint moved, so he was crouched beside her, holding her hand and looking into her face. “Hey, Zoe, honey, look at me,” he said.  “Getting worked up isn’t going to help you at all.  The most important thing is that you heal.  There’s no point going home if you just end up in a coma or something, right?”

Bucky looked over at the doctor.  He could relate to her need not to stay here.  He wouldn’t want to either.  “Is there any way she could go home with us?  If we keep an eye on her?  I mean, you could give us some instruction.  It’d be better than having to sedate her to be here, right?” 

The doctor furrowed her brow and looked at the chart. “It really wouldn’t be the best for her.”

“Doc, come on,” Clint said. “How many concussions have I had?  I know what to do.  And if anything happens, we’ll bring her right back.”

She squeezes Bucky hand gratefully when he offers to let her stay. Sure there would be issues she’d have to deal with if she did stay there, because her PTSD and trauma was harder to hide when in close quarters especially if they were going to look after her for two weeks. But anything would be better than staying here in this medical facility.

She looks up at the doctor, “deal, deal, deal I’ll follow all the rules and..and do whatever I need to. I can’t stay here but..but I’ll stay with them, as long as I need to,” she promises softly.

The doctor looks less than convinced but nods slowly, “okay..well I’ll leave you to get settled for a while and a medic will check on you in half an hour, alright? Don’t get too worked up, try not to,” she says gently before setting her chart down and leaving the three of them alone.