༄.°loony 🫧⋆˙

There is a pause.

“And I’m not happy to be here… but my wife wanted so… I had no choice,” he sighs, making you chuckle beside him.

“Always so dramatic,” you roll your eyes at him.

“Whatever.”

He leans towards you just a fraction, voice dropping so only you and the nearest mic catch it.

“I better not find your tweets about me again,” he frowns playfully.

You glance at him, unimpressed, amused— lips curling.

“We’ll see, baby,” you give him a wink.

A few crew members chuckle. Someone laughs. Katsuki clicks his tongue, but the grin gives him away.

The producer clears their throat. “So— today’s segment is… a little different.”

Boards are handed out to you two by the staff. Two stacks.

“One of you will be reading tweets about your spouse,” the producer explains, “and reacting, of course.”

Katsuki’s brows lift. Slowly. Dangerous interest sparks in his eyes.

“…Oh?” he says, taking the boards meant for you. “This should be fun.”

You accept your own stack— tweets about him— and feel the weight of them like a loaded weapon.

“Try not to start a fight,” you tease.

“No promises,” he replies immediately.

The first board in Katsuki’s hands flips up.

thirst tweet #1

@/jackedup008

Have you SEEN Katsuki’s wife? GODDAMN WOMANNN I’m LITERALLY FOAMING AT THE MOUTH

Katsuki simply stares at it.

Then looks at you.

Then back at the board.

“Understandable,” he says finally, slow and smug, arm tightening around the back of your chair. “But chill, she’s taken,” he smirks and you playfully roll your eyes.

thirst tweet #2

@/y/n_bakugou_fanpage

Unfortunately Dynamight CAN fight us all 💔

“The fuck? You even got a fanpage?” Katsuki raises a brow at the username. “These people are fast”

You don’t even hesitate, letting out a chuckle.

“Also, I can and I will fight you,” he says immediately, leaning forward, eyes locked on the camera. No smile. Just confidence.

Then he relaxes back again, smirk returning. “Don’t test me.”

“Nobody would dare to do that,” you assure him, gaining a proud look from him.

thirst tweet #3

@/marry_me_dyamight

Y/N Bakugou… the woman that you are…

You inhale, amused, knowing what’s gonna come.

And before you can even speak—

“Yeah,” Katsuki cuts in, nodding once, firm. Possessive. Proud.

“My woman.”

His hand settles at your knee like it belongs there. Because it does.

thirst tweet #4

@/dekubakusupporter

I will always ship dekubaku BUT DAMN @/dynamightofficial, i get it. i would marry her too😫😫

He pauses when he reads it.

“…Dekubaku,” he repeats, tone neutral, eyes flicking off to the side like he’s shelving a thought instead of denying it.

He clears his throat, then looks back up, expression settling into something calm, controlled.

“Is this you again?” he turns towards you, frowning.

“No, of course not. But hey, people seem to like you and Deku—“

“Shut up. That damned— whatever.”

A beat.

“Next,” he says, voice a bit rushed as he grabs the another board.

thirst tweet #5

@/explosionsandzerofucks

@/y/n_m_bakugou just one chance please I’m not even the jealous type, you can keep your little boyfriend on the side!!!

Katsuki laughs. Loud. Sharp.

“Little boyfriend?” he repeats, incredulous, sitting up straighter.

He looks into the camera, jaw set, eyes blazing.

“I’m her husband.”

He makes a pause, the words sinking in.

“The fuck they mean by that? Do they want to d—.”

“Katsuki,” you cut him off instantly, offering a warning look.

He rolls his eyes, but keeps quiet.

thirst tweet #6

@/allmight_fan_page1

i saw the way y/n walks him around like a dog… oh katsubby… you are not escaping these allegations

He reads it.

Stops.

“…Katsubby,” he repeats slowly, like he’s testing the word.

He exhales through his nose, eyes sliding away for half a second— just long enough to be suspicious.

“What the hell is that?” he mutters.

Then he looks back up, jaw set, expression calm.

“And she knows what she’s doing,” he says simply.

A beat.

“I just complain less when I’m with her.”

He hands the board back, face neutral.

The damage is already done.

“Of course baby,” you smile at him, patting his thigh.

There is another pause.

The producer clears his throat. “Uh… ready to switch? Mrs. Bakugou, you’ll now read tweets about Dynamight.”

Katsuki settles back in his chair, arms crossing over his chest, posture relaxed but eyes sharp— the kind of calm that says he’s ready to enjoy this.

He tilts his head towards you, a smug glint in his gaze.

“Oh, this,” he says, glancing at you sideways. “This I wanna hear.”

He smirks.

“Go on,” he says. “Read ’em.”

You lift the first board, already feeling his attention on you more than the cameras.

thirst tweet #1

@/dynadaddy69

Dynamight fucks like he fights. Loud, aggressive, and doesn’t stop until everything’s ruined🤤

“We are starting off strong,” you smile, shaking your head. “Even the username… should I call you that?” You jokingly ask, turning towards Katsuki.

He rolls his eyes.

“Try it and see what happens.”

“Pray for me people!” You laugh as your eyes flick down at the board. “Also… they figured you out fast.”

“Tch,” he scoffs, shaking his head. “They make it sound like I don’t have control.”

Then his eyes slide to you, slow and deliberate.

“…I do,” he adds. “I just choose not to.”

The crew goes very still and so do you.

“Let’s… cut that,” you mutter as you flip the boards.

thirst tweet #2

@/dynabaddie

i'm 67% sure dynamight's tip is the same shade as pepto bismol. we NEED a visual representation to sue the company for using a colour that's literally owned by you.

“Is this for real?” Katsuki scoffs.

You let out a small laugh, tilting your head. “This person… they’re definitely close.”

A grin curls at your lips, eyes flicking towards Katsuki. “Not that I’d ever confirm it for them, of course.”

You tap the board lightly. “But… yeah. Someone’s got good senses.”

thirst tweet #3

@/livelaughlovedynamight

I know Dynamight growls while eating it. I just know it. There’s no way that man stays quiet.

You glance up from the board, lips twitching.

Katsuki freezes for half a second.

Then exhales slowly through his nose.

“…Don’t you dare answer that.”

A pause.

Then, muttering at the camera, “Also, it’s none of your damn business.”

Your knee bumps his playfully, still repressing your smile.

thirst tweet #4

@/peonydance23

@/dynamightofficial definitely fucks like he’s trying to prove a point and I’d let him🙂‍↕️

Katsuki laughs, loud and unfiltered.

You grin, shaking your head a little, amused. “Oh, someone’s not subtle.”

Your eyes flick to Katsuki, who’s pretending not to care, and you laugh softly. “Not that I blame them. He does have a… certain energy.”

thirst tweet #5

@/allfordynamight

Y/N Bakugou is better than me because I wouldn’t have let that man leave the house dressed in that slutty little tight hero suit

You shake your head, smirking. “The suit is tight, sure… but honestly? The slutty little suit goes well with his slutty little waist.”

You glance at Katsuki, who’s trying not to react but fails just a little. “Can confirm. Totally matches.”

“The fuck… stop talking about my waist…” he groans.

thirst tweet #6

@/gravitationalpull_katsuki

“I want to meet Dynamight’s kids—” you read, tilting your head, “aww, that’s… actually cute.”

Then your eyes flick down to the rest of the tweet, and your smile falters just enough to let out a laugh.

“…my throat is ready 🙏🏻” you say, snorting softly.

A few seconds pass.

Your eyes widen, and a slow laugh escapes. “…Wait.” You tilt your head, squinting at the username. “…I think this is… my tweet.”

“…The hell,” he mutters, voice low, “yours?”

A smirk tugs at his lips, one corner lifting just enough to be cocky. He leans back in his chair, arms crossing, and shakes his head slowly.

“How many Twitter accounts do you even have, woman?” he adds, exasperated but teasing, eyes glinting with amusement.

You roll your eyes, laughing softly.

“Don’t even ask me…” you say, shaking your head. “They kept banning them because I posted… you know, NSFW stuff.”

“Tch. Figures,” he says, tone amused. “Don’t worry, though. You can meet the kids later.”

“Katsuki… you’re impossible,” you sigh, feeling the heat creeping to your cheeks.

He just laugh, shrugging calmly. “You love it.”

You toss the last board onto the pile, as you glance at Katsuki.

“You know,” he says, voice low and teasing, “you’re awfully chill about people losing their minds over me.”

You shrug, grinning. “Someone’s gotta keep the fans entertained. And you… make it way too easy.”

Katsuki’s smirk deepens. “Tch… don’t get too comfortable with me doing this,” he says, eyes flicking to the camera. “But… yeah. Thanks for the messages, made my day, surprisingly.”

You nod. “Seriously. Some of these tweets were ridiculous… but funny.”

Katsuki lets out a short laugh, rolling his shoulders. “…Alright. That’s enough chaos for today.”

“See you in the next one,” you wave and smile.

“Or not,” Katsuki rolls his eyes.

thirst tweet #1

@/dynamightsnumberonegirl

thinking of a certain blonde pro hero's biceps... (and how good they'd feel if they were currently around me, headlocking me as he fucks the air out of me...) sigh.

His brow lifts just a fraction, lips parting as he exhales through his nose— not annoyed, but ssessing.

He flexes his arm without even realizing it, bicep tightening beneath the fabric of his shirt.

“…Do you actually know how strong my headlock is?” he asks, eyes flicking up towards the camera, voice low and deliberate.

He tilts his head, mouth curling into a sharp grin.

“—Actually,” he adds, rolling his shoulder, “you’d probably be happy about it. Dying in a real good place and shit.”

thirst tweet #2

@/dynamightluvr2009

you btter believe that this man is a MUNCH. he will eat pussy so good. tongue thrusting in and out while he sucks on your clit. literally drooling rn... and then he'd get up from between your thighs with your slick all over his face ahskshdhkjkhaahaha

Katsuki reads all of it then lowers the board and stares straight ahead.

Then slowly drags a hand down his face.

“…Did this person get footage from my house?” he asks flatly.

He squints at the username.

“…Is this my wife again?”

He makes a pause.

“Because this shit is way too accurate.”

He clicks his tongue, shaking his head like he’s offended— but the smugness ruins it completely.

thirst tweet #3

@/warriorpoetry

do you think dynamight is mean with it??? does he bully it??? makes fun of how wet it is??? how full of cu—

He stops abruptly, then clears his throat once.

“…Yeah, no. I see where this was going.”

He snorts, shoulders bouncing as he leans back.

“I got a feeling everyone was ovulating at the same damn time while writing these,” he says, laughing under his breath.

Then, quieter, amused:

“Not wrong, though.”

thirst tweet #4

@/bakugousb1gfattoe

i filled my rose toy with exploding poppers so i could really experience riding that Dynamight D

Katsuki lowers the board just enough to stare over the top of it, brows knitting together in genuine disbelief before his mouth twitches despite himself.

“…That’s,” he starts, then stops, huffing out a short laugh through his nose. He rubs his thumb along the edge of the cardboard, shaking his head.

“That’s… weirdly creative,” he admits, clicking his tongue. “What the hell.”

He squints at the tweet like it personally offended him, then leans back in his chair, arms crossing over his chest, biceps flexing without effort.

“And how do you all know it sends sparks?” he adds, incredulous but clearly entertained. “That’s not public information.”

thirst tweet#5

@/herohearts

Guys PLEASE i need dynamight to yell at me (for research purposes ofc)

He doesn’t even read it twice.

“I think someone made a whole damn compilation of me yelling,” he says immediately, deadpan. “Go search that on YouTube.”

He pauses.

Then smirks.

“…If that does something, that’s on you.”

thirst tweet #6

@/katscherry

yearning for a blonde haired pro hero with the words murder god in his hero name to save me from my ovulation right now please god. he'd be so mean too...

Katsuki barks out a laugh.

“Jesus Christ, I was right about the ovulation,” he mutters.

He shakes his head, grin sharp and self‑satisfied.

“Yeah,” he admits, tapping the board against his knee, “I’m not gentle when I’m needed.”

Then he looks straight at the camera.

“And I always show up.”

thirst tweet #7

@/whorefordynadaddy

his face card has literally never declined. angry? hot. calm? hot. bleeding on the battlefield? unfortunately still hot. god has favorites. and i get it.

He hums, slow and pleased.

Runs his thumb along his jaw like he’s considering the evidence.

“…Can’t argue with facts,” he says simply.

thirst tweet #8

@/murdergoddynamightsproperty

trust that dynamight would keep his hero uniform on while he fucks you for stress relief after a rough day... mind you he's on you like the moment you open door.

Katuski exhales sharply.

“…Okay,” he admits, nodding once, “you got me with this one too.”

He squints suspiciously at the board.

“But how the fuck do people know this shit?” he mutters. “Am I that predictable?” he asks more to himself.

“Maybe I should change up some things about my sex life. Wife. Be ready.”

thirst tweet #9

@/handsomeandangry

so dynamight creates explosions? oh honey... i will show him what a REAL explosion looks like when i open those legs

Katsuki shakes his had in disbelief, as he stares at the card board.

“Those are some big words,” he says, eyes gleaming.

Then he leans forward slightly.

“But I doubt you can back it up.”

He pauses for a bit.

“Also, what’s with this obsession with explosions and orgasms? You really are freaks,” he snickers as he moves to the other board.

thirst tweet #10

@/explosiveaesthetics

Dynamight looks like he could handle heavy loads but so can I👀👀 try me sir

He clicks his tongue, eyes widening slightly at the phrasing. He looked almost impressed.

“Now… aren’t you having a way with words?” he smirks. “But I respect ambition.”

Then, smirking:

“Just don’t collapse under pressure.”

thirst tweet #11

@/glowuptokyo

Day 1272 without hearing dynamight call me a good girl... life is pain 💔

Katsuki’s expression shifts— slower, more deliberate. Then he tilts his head.

“…We’d have to be in a very particular setting for me to say that,” he replies evenly.

The implication hangs thick in the air. “But I will surely tell that to my wife.”

thirst tweet #12

@/dynamightdaily

NO guilotine will take away the HEAD im about to give to this man. #whore4dynamight

He exhales through his nose, amused.

“Damn,” he mutters. “That’s commitment. Keep fighting for me, please.”

thirst tweet #13

@/goldenblast

I need PRO HERO SEX GOD DYNAMIGHT TO BLAST THIS PUSSY RIGHT NEOWWWWW!!!!

Katsuki laughs, loud and unapologetic.

“Tch. Control yourself,” he says— then lets out a little smirk. “Also, blast? Funny way of calling it.”

thirst tweet #14

@/chaoticbeauty

Please reject me so I can get over you @/dynamightofficial💔

Katsuki pauses a few moments, then scoffs softly at the confession.

“…Not happening.”

He lowers the board, eyes sharp and unapologetic.

“Get comfortable, you’ll stay there for a while.”

Katsuki lets the last board slide down onto the stack as he leans back in the chair, posture loose, completely at ease— like this whole thing has just been a warm-up for his ego.

“…Y’know,” he says, voice low and calm but with that edge that makes it clear he could snap at any second, “this is getting good actually.”

A corner of his mouth lifts. Not a smile— but a warning.

“Even though all his confidence,” he continues, tapping the armrest once with a sharp, deliberate motion, “only ever shows up online.” He shrugs, slow and casual, like it’s the most obvious thing in the world. “Figures.”

He leans forward slightly, elbows resting on his knees, hands clasped loosely, gaze tightening. Every twitch of his smirk, every slight raise of his brow, makes it clear he knows the effect he has— that this room is hanging on him, powerless, and he loves it.

“Still,” he adds, voice dropping low, slow, the air around him thickening with tension and amusement, “keep it coming. I like knowing exactly what kind of thoughts I’m living in rent‑free.” His smirk curls slightly, more teasing than threatening, but still enough to make anyone in the room squirm.

“…Now if this is finished,” he mutters, voice low and almost teasing, “…I’ve got a reputation to uphold.”

The camera lingers for a beat on his figure. The studio is quiet, the tension thick, the air practically humming.

thirst tweet #1

@bakudekudefender69

Pro Hero Dynamight saving the city with explosions AND that slutty waist. Pick a struggle, sir

He leans back in the chair like he owns the space, tongue pressing briefly to the inside of his cheek.

“…Slutty?” he repeats, incredulous, then scoffs. “I’m literally working.”

His eyes flick up, sharp with amusement. “And I’m doing it well.”

thirst tweet #2

@greatexplosionfuckmegod

Dynamight could tell me to shut up and I’d say thank you.

He doesn’t even look at the camera at first. Just reads it. Then—

“Shut up,” he says flatly, like he didn't even care. He glances up with sharp eyes.

“Now where’s my thank you?”

Laughter breaks out, loud and immediate.

thirst tweet #3

@peonypunk00

i’m going to destroy every chair on earth so the only place he has to sit is on my face

He drops his gaze, looks at the chair beneath him, then spreads his legs just slightly — claiming the space.

“Well, you’re doing a terrible job,” he says, smirk slow as his gaze dips. “I’m clearly sitting just fine.”

thirst tweet #4

@dynadaddy_

top me @/dynamightofficial, i deserved it

Katsuki hums, slow and thoughtful, like he’s genuinely considering it. He tilts his head, eyes narrowing with interest rather than annoyance.

“What’d you do to earn that?”

thist tweet #5

@explosive_thoughts

‘Oh look at me I’m so strong and handsome and I defeated afo’ girl fuck you

He squints, then laughs— sharp, surprised.

“…Okay, first of all,” he says, sitting up straighter, “accurate.”

Then he shrugs.

“Second, I kinda wanna meet them. That’s my level of confidence.”

thirst tweet #6

@dynamight_s_waist

oh i know its veiny @/dynamightofficial

Katsuki’s smile turns slow. He tilts his head, eyes gleaming.

“Oh?” He leans back, arms crossing, gaze never leaving the screen.

“Then go on,” he says. “What else do you know?”

thirst tweet #7

@sparksandzerofucks

Dynamight’s explosions are loud but my moans would be louder.

He exhales through his nose, amused, shoulders relaxing like he’s settling into this now.

“That’s a big claim,” he replies, shaking his head.

thirst tweet #8

@/groundzero0

I could take Dynamight

“In a fight?” Katsuki asks immediately, brows furrowing, genuine confusion on his face.

The director coughs. “Uh… no.”

He blinks. Then groans, dragging a hand down his face. “…I hate this place.”

thirst tweet #9

@bunnyspony

dynamight’s name is so long, i wonder what else is

Katsuki leans forward again— slowly, intentionally— forearms braced on his thighs.

“I’ll tell you what isn’t,” he says coolly. “My patience.”

thirst tweet #10

@y_n_bakugou

@/dynamightofficial tomorrow isn’t promised!!! we need to fuck today!!!

“The fuck—” He freezes. Stares intently at the username, then groans so hard he drops his head back.

“Why is my wife on this list?” He points at the screen. “And why does she have internet access?”

thirst tweet #11

@no1pussypopper77

I need to see Dynamight’s abs right now 😫😫

He sighs, already halfway standing. “Relax.”

With zero hesitation, he lifts his shirt just enough— no flexing, no posing, just defined muscle and obvious strength.

Gasps and giggles erupt in the studio, and one very loud oh my god can be heard.

He drops the shirt like nothing happened.

thirst tweet #12

@redsoji

Dynamight’s fav sex position must be missionary since that man never shuts his mouth. We can argue in peace while he’s dicking me down.🤤🤤

Katsuki considers it, nodding slowly.

“Clever theory,” he says.

Then he looks straight into the camera. “But wrong.”

There is a pause, then,

“It's doggy.”

People in the studio gasp, again.

thirst tweet #13

@dynamightfanpage

the way he leans in when he’s annoyed??? Sir, this is not foreplay. Or is it??👁️👁️

He reads it, then deliberately leans in again— closer, heavier, gaze unwavering.

“This is how I get people to listen,” he says evenly. “If you’re distracted,” his mouth curves, “that’s your problem.”

thirst tweet #14

@katsuki_s_lefttesticle

I’m IN LOVE WITH THIS MAN THERE’s JUST SOMETHING UNDIAGNOSED ABOUT HIM

Katsuki snorts.

“Yeah,” he says. “It’s called drive.”

thirst tweet #15

@explosionbetweenmylegs

Dynamight makes me see sparks but can he make me see stars as well???

His smile turns sharp and controlled.

“That depends,” he says slowly, “on how much you can handle.”

thirst tweet #16

@kurabaku88

I love Great Explosion Sex God Dynamight or whatever is name is

He exhales, shaking his head.

“…They never say it right,” he mutters.

Katsuki exhales slowly through his nose and finally lowers the last cardboard, as he lets it drop onto the pile.

He leans back in his chair, spreading his legs, one arm draped over the backrest, the other sitting in his lap. There’s a grin pulling at his mouth— lazy, entirely too pleased with himself.

He quickly scans the studio: the crew still half-laughing, the director rubbing their face, someone behind the camera very clearly regretting their life choices.

“You’re all insufferable perverts,” he says, voice low and rough with amusement. Not angry. Not scolding. He’s entertained. His eyes flick towards the camera, sharp and knowing.

“Seriously. You really think you could handle me just because you’re typing behind a screen?”

He scoffs, shaking his head once, smirk widening as he taps the edge of the cardboard against his knee.

“Pathetic,” he adds— then pauses, grin sharpening. “…But I don’t hate it.”

Then his grin fades into something slower, more deliberate. His eyes narrow as if he has just remmebered something.

“…And you,” he says, lifting hand, finger pointing towards the camera, voice dipping into something dangerous but unmistakably playful, “just wait until I get home.”