wowww wow thank you this means a lot!!!! I enjoyed writing that fic so much! even tho it took forever lol :)) <3

thank you this is soooo nice :) I’ll always have a playlist w my fics not to worry <33

trying to acknowledge and process my cliched yet real eldest daughter guilt I’ve never in my life experienced something that feels too big to think about until now I feel like I’m holding myself to a standard that makes no logical sense I’m moving the goalposts quite often and I’m wallowing yet manic and even writing’s not helping because it looks like the psychotic ramblings of a crazy person like one lowkey flew over the cuckoo’s nest!!!! but I won’t throw them away I’m like holding space or whatever I just constantly worry about everyone I love and I’m hesitant to express this to them because I don’t want them to feel like I’m guilt tripping or adversity farming but omg. this feeling is crippling and I want to let myself enjoy things I want to be less abrasive I want to give people the benefit of the doubt I want to forgive everyone who has ever hurt me but I cantttt I can’t. I’m so bad at it!!!!! shouting everything I feel at my silly hrpf blog because I’m incapable of keeping my mouth shut and it’s lowkey really hard to be a girl and it’s hard in a different way to be a woman and I feel stuck in between I kinda wish I was 7 years old on a field trip with my friends in my old scratchy school uniform and sometimes I wish I was one of my mom’s childhood friends instead of her daughter even though I loved being her daughter!!!!!! 😑

11:11 by @yellowlemontime