aeri

That summer, you met your best friend. Jake Sim and his family moved from Australia—which was the coolest thing to five-year-old you. Jake’s father worked for a well-known international company and been transferred at the time they moved. Since you were the only other kid his age in the neighborhood (there were mostly families with teenagers or newly-weds), he quickly befriended you, even knocking on your door the day after his family introduced themselves to ask if you wanted to play outside with him.

“Hi! It’s me. We met yesterday! I was wondering if your daughter could come out and play?” Jake had asked your mother sweetly after she opened the door for him.

“Hi! It’s me. We met yesterday! I was wondering if your daughter could come out and play?” Jake had asked your mother sweetly after she opened the door for him.

She was, of course, thrilled that there was another kid in the neighborhood, so she sent you out to play with the orders that you be back in time for dinner. You promised you would be and ran outside. And that was the beginning of a lifetime friendship with Jake Sim.

“Let’s play pirates!” Jake suggested, picking a spare branch up off the ground and swinging it through the air.

But you didn’t want to play pirates. So, you crossed your arms and pouted. “I don’t want to play that. We should play house instead! I’ll be the mom and you can be the dad!”

“Well,” he tilted his head to the side, “I guess we could play house. How do you play?”

“I don’t know. You just pretend to be the dad and I’m the mom. And we go grocery shopping and take care of the dog and stuff.”

“We can’t buy anything; we don’t have money!” He looked at you, completely surprised that you would suggest such a thing.

You just giggled, pushing him a little, “No silly. Fake groceries. Like this stick can be a candy cane, and that rock is a loaf of bread!”

“Oh. Well, what about the dog? We don’t have one.”

“We can just pretend the dog exists, silly.”

And that was that. Almost every day that summer, you and Jake played house or went on “adventures” to the end of the street or went swimming with your families down at the beach or spent the days watching movies at each other’s houses (though the movie selection you both had was pretty limited, so you watched the same five movies over and over again usually).

That school year, you both ended up attending the same elementary school and were even placed in the same kindergarten class. So, you were obviously attached at the hip there too.

That was the same year that you and Jake got a set of walkie-talkies for Christmas. Your parents had decided to gift them to you so that you could keep in contact easier during the winter when it was colder and so that you wouldn’t be pestering them to use the phone.

That night, you wanted to try it out, so you pushed the side button and took a deep breath, “Jake? Are you there?”

There were a couple minutes of silence, and you figured maybe it didn’t work or he was already asleep. But then the walkie-talkie beeped, and his voice flooded through the speaker, “Yeah. Sorry, I couldn’t figure out how to make it work at first. But I figured it out.”

And so, you stayed up way too late talking and giggling over the walkie-talkies—something you continued to do well into your teen years.

Later on, in second grade, when a group of girls bullied Jake because he was too kind to stand up to them (“They’re girls yn, it’s not like I can hit them back,” he had insisted), you were the one who stood up for him. You had yelled at them, reprimanding them for being so mean to someone who was too nice to do anything back. And when they didn’t listen the first time, you hit all three of them, not even concerned about your near suspension (“Jake doesn’t deserve to be treated like that,” you had shrugged as you told your parents about it).

When you started junior high, the two of you expanded your friend group. Jake met Heeseung, Jay, and Sunghoon (though Heeseung was a grade above both of you) and introduced them to you as soon as he started hanging out with them more. You befriended two girls, Karina and Winter, and a few boys in the class below you, Sunoo, Jungwon, and Riki. And you introduced them to Jake and his friends just as he had done for you.

That’s how the two of you grew from only having each other to having a small pack of people who had your back.

When you were in your last year of junior high, 9th grade, a boy asked you on a date. You were so excited because he was cute and seemed so sweet. And Jake, being your best friend, was excited for you. He helped you get ready by helping you choose an outfit, how to style your hair, and even which perfume to wear. But when he never showed up, you were disappointed. He didn’t even call you until three hours after he was supposed to pick you up, giving a half-assed, lame excuse for why he couldn’t show up.

Jake had been waiting at your house with you and when you trudged back into your room after the phone call, tears brimming in your eyes and your bottom lip wobbling, he immediately stood up to pull you into a hug and comfort you. And then he pulled away, grinning widely, “Let’s just go to the arcade instead!”

And who were you to say no to his sweet smile and kind suggestion?

Your mom had smiled as Jake led you out of the house and to the arcade a couple blocks from your house, promising your mom to have you back before 9:00. That was the first time you had wondered if maybe you had a crush on your best friend. But you pushed that thought to the back of your mind. That was just silly.

“Yn, let’s promise each other something.” Jake looked at you as the two of you walked back to your house.

You glanced over at him too, confused. “Okay?”

“If we’re not dating anyone or married by the time, we’re like… 25, let’s just marry each other!”

“Ew, that’s gross,” you screwed up your nose, pushing him. He stumbled a bit and pouted, holding his heart dramatically as you continued to talk, “I could never date you! You’re like my brother!”

He rolled his eyes at that. “Just promise. You’ll probably be with someone by that point anyways. It’s in, like, ten years.”

“Fine. I promise.”

With that, he grinned at you and the two of you did your special secret best friend handshake before parting ways and going to your houses across the street from one another. You slept easy that night, knowing that you had such a great best friend who would always be there for you.

𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊

“Yn!” your mom called from the kitchen, “Jake’s on the phone!”

You groaned, sitting up and rubbing the sleep out of your eyes. The first day of summer break after your high school graduation and he’s already making you get up early. You pushed the duvet off you and trudged to the kitchen, tugging your fingers through your tangled hair. You took the phone from your mom and walked back to your room. “Hello?”

“Hey, yn!” he chirped, a little too cheerfully for eight o’clock in the morning on a non-school day.

“What do you want,” you whined, “I was still sleeping.”

“Well, I was going to ask if you wanted to go to the beach today, but it’s okay if you’re too tired—”

“Nope, I’ll change right now. Are we taking your car or mine?”

He laughed at your sudden eagerness, “Well, we took my car last time. So, I think it’s your turn to drive us. Plus, your car is better for hauling the boards.”

You figured he was right. You had an ’83 Ford Bronco and it was easier to get the boards in the back when you took the canvas top off than it was to put on top of the ’73 Dodge Charger that he had. The Charger was also his pride and joy, and he hated the thought of it getting scratched by the boards. He had worked extra hours for it starting from the time he turned 15 and started driving his dad’s car to practice for when he could get his license. He had seen the Charger at the used car lot one day and decided he had to have it. So, by the time he was 17 and had saved enough money to buy it, he did.

Your Ford Bronco was half a gift and half earned. You started working at the movie theater to save up for it once you got your license but your parents, seeing how bad you wanted it, offered to pay for half of it as a birthday gift. And that was how both you and Jake got cars for your 17th birthdays.

“Yeah, you’re right,” you moved the phone to your other ear as you sifted through your closet looking for your bathing suit and wetsuit. “Okay, give me a few minutes to change and get all my things together and then we can get the car ready, yeah?”

“Cool. I still have to change too, so I’ll meet you out there in ten?”

“See you in ten!”

He hung up and you brought the phone back out to the kitchen, setting it back on the receiver and then hurrying back to your room to change. You pulled the white swimsuit you had bought two weeks earlier on and then tugged your wetsuit on over it. You tossed sunscreen, a water bottle, a hairbrush, and a towel into your bag before grabbing some snacks from the kitchen and shoving them in as well.

“You and Jake are surfing today?” your mom asked, not looking up as she continued wiping the counter in the kitchen.

You nodded, even though she wasn’t look, “Yeah. I’m going out to meet him right now.”

“Be careful out there today.”

“We will be,” you smiled and kissed her on the cheek, slipping on your sandals and grabbing your keys off the hook by the door.

As soon as you stepped outside, Jake came hopping down the steps of his front porch, grinning wildly and waving at you as he crossed the street. You met him at the driveway, hugging him tightly and laughing as he picked you up and spun you around. Anyone who didn’t know any better would think the two of you were in a relationship. The truth was, you’d just known each other so long that your friendship dynamic was just like that.

“Hi, sweetheart,” he teased, setting you down. “Let me help you load your board and then I’ll go back and get mine.”

“Okay,” You nodded, opening the garage and pulling out the surfboard as well as your surfboard leash. Even though you’re completely capable of loading the board into the back of your car, Jake likes to help anyway. He’s always been like that.

He loaded his things afterwards and hopped into the car after you, sifting through the cassette tapes in the glove box to find one he wanted to listen to.

“Pearl Jam, Nirvana, or Stone Temple Pilots?” he asked holding up a few cassette tapes as you pulled out of the driveway.

“Let’s listen to Nirvana. The first track on that cassette is “Come As You Are” and I really like that one.”

So, he pushed the cassette tape into the car’s cassette player and soon “Come As You Are” by Nirvana started to play through the speakers. You rolled the windows down and the two of you screamed the lyrics as you drove. It was about a thirty-minute drive to the beach from your neighborhood which wasn’t too long of a drive, and it also gave the two of you time to blast music and just enjoy each other’s company.

You turned the music down a little so you could hear yourself talk over it, “Is it just the two of us or did you invite everyone else?”

“Just the two of us,” he grinned, “It’s the first day of summer. And I kind of wanted to spend time with just you. Like we always do the first day of summer.”

It was true that you and Jake always spent the first day of summer break together, just the two of you. Though up until this point you had figured it was unintentional.

“Well, aren’t you sweet, Jakey,” you cooed, glancing over at him and squeezing his hand before focusing back on the road.

He hummed and then reached over to turn the music up again, blasting “In Bloom” and singing along again at the top of his lungs. Once the song was over, he turned the music down again, and you glanced at him to see his brows furrowed, indicating that he was, in fact, deep in thought.

“What are you thinking about?”

“I want to start a band.”

Your eyes widened at that. It’s no secret to you that Jake loved music. In fact, ever since he was young, he’s been incredibly musically inclined. He could basically do it all (which you always complained was no fair)—he had the voice of an angel, had learned how to play the guitar and the bass when he was seven before going on to teach himself the piano at age nine and then taking drum lessons when he was eleven. And he had continued to practice each of his musical talents pretty much every day since then while still somehow managing to be an honor roll student, go surfing with friends, and play team sports at school.

“Really?” you finally asked.

“Yeah. Is that crazy?” he chewed on his bottom lip, thinking it over. “I mean, I already know who I would ask to join. Heeseung, Sunghoon, and Jay. They can all sing. Heeseung plays piano, Jay knows how to play the guitar a little, and I know Sunghoon is really good at playing the bass even if he’s a little shy about showing off. And so, I could play drums. I’ve been playing around with some band names too. And we’d of course start with just covers. Maybe that’s all we’d do. I don’t know. But it could be fun. It would at least be a fun project for the summer.”

You shook your head, “That’s not crazy at all, baby. You’re all really talented and I think you’d have fun with that. Now is the perfect time to start. And there are so many songs you could cover. Plus, I know Hee writes music from time to time and so do you. If you got to that point, you could eventually write songs for your band. Go for it, Jake. I’ll be there to support you.”

“Thank you, yn. I think I’ll talk to them about it tomorrow then.”

“Cool,” you hummed as you pulled up to the beach. “We’re here now, are you ready?”

He grinned at you, climbing out of the car, “I was born ready, yn. The waves look good today.”

“Yeah,” you glanced out toward the ocean, “they do.”

You and Jake unloaded your surfboards and bags, taking them down to the beach and setting everything down. Jake looked at you as you attached the leash to your surfboard. “I waxed my board last night. Do you need to wax yours?”

“I waxed mine a couple days ago. Since I figured we’d probably be using them this week.”

“Smart girl,” Jake teased you, winking playfully. You pushed him into the sand and both of you erupted into giggles.

You both made sure everything was good to go before taking the boards out into the water, paddling further out to wait for another wave.

𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊

“Man, did you see how big that one was!” Jake cheered as you laid catching your breath on the beach next to each other.

“Yeah, it was huge. I’m surprised you didn’t wipe out.”

“Hey,” he pouted at you, “don’t say that as if I wipe out regularly. I’m good at surfing.”

You nod, “You are. Which is why it’s fun to tease you.”

He continued pouting despite the compliment you gave him. The two of you just laid in the sand, your boards next to you. The sky seemed bluer than usual, as if celebrating the start of summer vacation—the last summer vacation as kids. The waves crashed against the shore in a lulling melody and the distant thronging of laughter and chatter from other people further down the beach were in harmony with the sound of the ocean.

“Do you want to swim or do something else?” Jake asked, looking over at you.

You turned to look at him to, grinning slyly. “Well, I didn’t buy a new swimsuit for nothing.”

“Ooh, a new swimsuit?” his eyes widened as you looked at each other. “Let’s see it, then. Did you buy it by yourself, or did you go with the girls?”

“Winter and Karina helped me pick it out. We all bought new ones.” You sat up but crouched in front of him. “Can you help me unzip it? It’s kind of hard to reach on my own.”

He sat up too, reaching for the zipper. His fingers, cool from the drying saltwater on them, brushed your damp hair off your neck so he could see the zipper better. He dragged the zipper down your back enough for you to be able to grab it and pull it the rest of the way down.

You thanked him, standing up and unzipping the wetsuit the rest of the way before peeling it off your skin, shivering as the sun kissed your hidden skin. Once the wetsuit was off and you were only standing in the white swimsuit you had under it, you grinned and did a little spin for him. “Nice, right?”

“Hell yeah. It looks really good on you,” he tugged his bottom lip in between his teeth, but if you noticed you didn’t say anything about it. “The white is really pretty.”

“Thank you,” you laughed sitting back down in the sand next to him and enjoying the feeling of sun soaking into your skin, still slightly damp from the wetsuit.

“Well, I hate to break it to you, but my swimsuit isn’t nearly as sexy as yours,” Jake sighed as he stood to strip himself of his own wetsuit.

You giggled at the pink flamingos decorating his trunks as he shimmied out of the wetsuit and mocked you, spinning in a circle to show you the shorts. “Wow, flamingos. Those are sick.”

“Right? They were on clearance. I had to have them.”

He sat down beside you again, sighing at the feeling of sunlight on his toned chest. The two of you just sat there for a while, enjoying the sunshine. You breathed deeply, comforted by the familiar smell of the ocean and, faintly, fried food from a stand somewhere down the beach. Seagulls squawked as they flew overhead, and children laughed as they threw sand in each other’s faces. This was home. You would miss it when you left for college.

“So do you want to swim now?” Jake finally asked from beside you.

You nodded, standing up quickly. Jake followed you, stretching his arms over his head as he stood. You tried not to stare at his stomach as the muscle there shifted under his smooth skin. You had always thought Jake was cute. That much was just fact. But you tried not to think about how attractive he was to you because it felt wrong to think about a friend that way.

“I’ll race you to the water,” Jake smirked at you, and you grinned back. The two of you were always competitive against one another.

“I’m gonna win this time,” you muttered as he created a starting line in the sand, “I really am.”

“I’d like to see you try.”

(Spoiler, you didn’t win.)

𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊

“Do you wanna get a burger?”

You were climbing into the car when Jake asked you, eyes wide as he tilted his head to the side. You shrugged, “Sure. As long as you can get us free burgers.”

“Sick,” he smiled, buckling his seatbelt, “You know my job gives me my food for free. I would have gotten it for you even if we did have to pay, though.”

Oh, Jake. Always the gentleman. You hummed in response as you pulled away, leaving the beach behind you. Jake worked at a burger joint not far from your neighborhood. And it happened to be right next door to the movie theater you worked at. So, he frequently got you free burger meals and you helped him get into movies for free.

“Did you have fun today?” he asked, taking out the Nirvana cassette and replacing it with a Pearl Jam one.

“Yeah, I did. I’m glad we got to hang out together. Just the two of us. It’s been a while since senior year was so busy.”

He nodded and then turned the music up. Since the two of you had been friends for so long, words weren’t always necessary. Both of you appreciated just being together most of the time.

You finally pulled up to the burger joint, but Jake told you that you could stay in the car while he picked them up, so you waited. It didn’t take long for him to come back out with the bag of food. You smiled at him as he got back in the car, and he smiled back.

“God, I’m so hungry,” he groaned, opening the bag and peering in at the burgers and fries.

“Wait until we get home. Then we can enjoy it more.”

You didn’t see it, but he smiled to himself when you referred to your house as home—as if it was just as much his home as it was yours. As silly as it was, that made him happy.

The two of you unloaded your car in silence once you made it back to your house, trying to do so as quick as possible so the food wouldn’t get cold.

“We’re home, Mom!” you called as you walked into your house, Jake following close behind you.

Your mom was in the living room, reading a book on the couch. You hugged her in greeting and Jake did the same. Jake had always gotten along well with your mom. She spoiled him as if he were her own son. And he respected her just the same as if she were his mother.

After greeting your mom and telling her about your morning at the beach, you pull Jake up to your bedroom so the two of you can eat in peace. You grab a towel from the closet and lay it out on the floor, setting the bags of food on it. The two of you sit on the floor beside the towel, eating over it so you didn’t make a mess on the carpet. You eat in silence, too hungry to do anything except eat.

Once you’re finished, you stand up, wrapping up the towel and tossing it in the hamper in your bathroom. Then you turned to grab clothes from your closet, talking to Jake while you sift through outfit options, “I’m going to change now.”

“Are you showering?” he asked, looking up at you from where he still sat on the floor.

“No,” you shrugged, “I’ll just shower tonight before bed”

Jake would never say it out loud, but he liked the smell of salt and sunscreen and the outdoors on you, especially when it mixed with your perfume. Maybe he was crazy for even thinking about how he liked the way you smelled, but sometimes he couldn’t help it.

“Also, there are some of your clothes in the closet. I labeled the drawer that has your stuff in it. You can change in the bathroom, and I’ll change in here,” you added, coming out of the closet with a pile of clothing in your arms.

He stood up, making his way into your closet, squeezing past you. He pulled a pair of blue jeans, a white t-shirt, and one of his flannels out of the drawer before leaving your room and making his way down the hall to the bathroom to change.

Once he was gone, you closed your bedroom door and quickly changed into fresh, dry clothes. Then you sat on the edge of your bed, tugging a brush through your halfway dried hair. You hummed along to a song stuck in your head as you did. You stopped at the small knock on your door, followed by Jake’s voice, “Are you dressed?”

“I am,” you called back, smiling to yourself at how kind he was to ask first.

He opened the door to your bedroom, peeking his head in before walking in all the way. He sat down on the bed next to you, taking the brush from your hand and silently brushing through your hair for you. He had been doing it since you were young, and you broke your arm falling out of the tree in his backyard. He’d felt responsible for your injury and had decided to do everything he could for you from brushing your hair to tying your shoes. The habit stuck even now. And it made your stomach churn.

“You don’t have to do that, you know,” you whispered, but you didn’t try to take the brush back from him. “My arm’s been healed for years.”

He laughs, “I know. But I like doing it for you. I like helping you.”

He finishes brushing your hair in silence and then you stand, putting the brush away and stretching your legs. The two of you migrate to the living room and he settles himself on the couch while you look through the movies you have.

“We still mostly have VHS tapes. Mom hasn’t been buying very many DVDs ‘cause they’re a little more expensive. But we have a few.”

“I’m good with whatever. We could watch a Disney movie, though. Like when we were kids!”

“Oh my god, can we watch Beauty and the Beast?” you turned towards him, holding up the VHS tape.

His eyes lit up as well when you held up the movie. The movie was associated with good memories for both of you. You had both been twelve when the movie was first released, and you had begged your parents to let you go see the movie. At first, they were reluctant to let the two of you go alone because as much as they let you wander, they were still cautious about where you were allowed to wander. But eventually, the two of you convinced them and they gave you money to buy movie tickets. You had gone to the theater that afternoon and you had both loved the movie.

“Yes,” he grinned, all but leaping off the couch to grab the movie from you so he could be the one to push it into the VHS. “Wow, I haven’t watched this in a while. Do you remember when we saw it in the theater?”

You nodded, “I remember. We had to beg our parents to let us go. They thought the theater was too far for us to go alone and they were too busy to take us.”

“But we eventually got them to let us go,” Jake finished, pushing in the tape and hitting the button to rewind it back to the beginning of the movie so you could watch it. “Do you have popcorn? We can make some while we wait for it to rewind.”

You stood and he followed you to the kitchen. You searched through the pantry until you found the microwaveable popcorn. You passed it to Jake, and he ripped off the plastic before putting it in the microwave and starting it. You got cups of water for both of you (your mom didn’t usually keep sugary drinks other than juice).

Once you had your snacks, you sat back down on the couch and Jake grabbed the TV remote. The tape was finished rewinding so he pushed play and then fast forwarded through the previews. “You didn’t want to watch the previews, did you?”

“Not for movies that came out six years ago,” you giggled, rolling your eyes playfully.

He stopped fast-forwarding it when he got to the beginning of the movie. You snuggled into his side as the movie began. He wrapped an arm around you—another habit of his he’d been developing since he was younger. Time spent with Jake, like this, was always comfortable. Jake was comfortable. He was familiar. You didn’t want to think about what it would be like when summer was over. So, you pushed the thought out of your mind and focused on the movie.

For the rest of the afternoon, the two of you watch your favorite childhood movies on VHS as well as a few of the new DVDs your mom had bought recently. When your mom gets back from running errands in town, she invites Jake to stay for dinner, so he does.

“Thank you so much for dinner, it was really good.” Jake thanks your mom, smiling as he rinsed off his plate in the sink. “I always enjoy dinner with your family.”

“I’m glad you enjoyed it, Jake. You know you’re welcome any time,” your mom had answered, taking the plate from him and cleaning the rest of it, shooing the two of you away to do something else.

You decide to go for a walk through the neighborhood. Though the sun is starting to set, it’s still warm outside. Jake walks so close to you, your shoulders brush against one another with every step.

“Do you ever think about how it seems like just yesterday we were kids? Like just yesterday we were playing house down the street and causing mischief?” Jake’s voice is soft as he speaks, as if he doesn’t want to disturb the stillness around you as you walk.

“Sometimes,” you say, just as softly, “Actually, I can’t even remember what my life was like before I met you. Since you’ve been a part of it for so long.”

He nodded and sighed, looking up at the sky as the first few stars started to wink into consciousness overhead. “I don’t want to think about what life would be like without you.”

“Then don’t.”

“Okay.”

You turned and started walking back home. You didn’t talk for the rest of the walk, just enjoyed the pleasant hum of life around you as the sun dipped lower and lower below the horizon. When you finally made it back, Jake hugged you, kissed your cheek and headed back to his own house across the street from yours, turning to wave again when he got to the door. So, you did the same.

The next morning, as you sat at the dining room table eating a bowl of cereal, the phone started to ring. You set your spoon down and went to retrieve it. “Hello?”

“Yn!” Of course, it was Jake. No one else would call your house at 9:00 am during summer vacation. “Guess what!”

“What?”

“They said yes!”

“Uh, what?”

He laughed at your confusion, “The guys! They agreed to start the band with me!”

“Oh!” you felt silly that you had already forgotten all about his plan to start a band over the summer. “That’s great, Jake!”

“We’re meeting today to come up with a set list and practice so that we can start putting our name out there and booking gigs! It’s gonna be so much fun, don’t you think?”

“Oh, for sure. And you’re definitely gonna invite me to every single one of your gigs, right?” you asked, cereal long forgotten as you got excited about Jake’s newest passion.

“Yes,” he giggled, “Do you maybe want to come watch us practice today? You could also give us input on what songs you think we should do. You know, as an audience member.”

“Sure. What time?”

“I’ll just grab you when I’m headed over to Seung’s. Is that okay?”

“Sounds perfect,” you smiled even though he couldn’t see it. “I’ll see you whenever.”

“See you!”

You hung up the phone, setting it back down on the receiver before going to put the bowl of soggy cereal in the sink. You couldn’t wait to see what Jake and his new band would come up with.

𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊

“Tell me why we’re going two hours early again?” Jungwon complained as he squeezed into the back seat of your car next to Sunoo and Riki.

You glared at him playfully, “Because Jake’s my best friend and I want a spot in the very front.”

He huffed out a sigh and sat back, buckling his seatbelt. Sunoo leaned forward, tapping you on the shoulder, “Are Karina and Winter going to meet us there?”

“Yeah, they’re taking Karina’s car. I just live closer to you three than she does, so I decided to pick you up.”

Sunoo sits back in his seat too and you turn the music up in your car. The three boys banter playfully in the backseat while you sing along to the music pouring out of the speakers in your car.

It only took a few minutes to get to the venue after you picked Jungwon up. As you pulled into the fairly empty parking lot, Karina pulled up beside you in her car, waving frantically and grinning widely. You smiled as you turned the car off and stepped out of the car, wrapping her in a warm hug and then hugging Winter right after. The boys greeted them as well and then you all walked into the venue together.

Once you were past the venue security, you were guided into the concert hall where Jake and his band were setting up for a sound check (you had shown the security guards the V.I.P. lanyard Jake had given you and they let you right in). The six of you settled in the front of the venue and you waved up at Jake who sat adjusting his drum set. He waved back at you and smiled.

You talked to your friends as the band played through the first few bars of each of the songs they had prepared before disappearing off the stage to wait in the dressing rooms. You couldn’t wait for the show to start. You had visited Jake while he practiced a few times and truthfully, they were all really good. They were all charismatic, so you were excited for the performance they would give. It was just a small gig—a performance in place of another local band who had to cancel last minute—but it would pave the way for them to perform more in the future.

The next two hours passed by quickly, thankfully, since you were talking and laughing with your friends, watching as the venue filled up with people who were intrigued by the band who would be playing in the place of who they had expected.

When the four boys finally step out on stage, the crowd claps before falling silent as Jake starts speaking into the microphone in front of him, adjusted just right so he could still play drums. “Hi everyone. I know we’re not exactly who you were wanting to come see, but we’re so happy you all came out anyway. We hope you’ll enjoy our performance and continue to support us in the future.”

And with that, their setlist started. You had helped them pick songs you thought people would like the most, suggesting “Come As You Are” by Nirvana, “Even Flow” by Pearl Jam, “Interstate Love Song” by Stone Temple Pilots, an a few others.

As Jake and his friends play through the songs, you can’t seem to pull your eyes away from him. Maybe you were just going crazy, but he looked… different. He looked hot. And it shouldn’t have been any different than any other time you saw him. He was wearing an outfit that he’d worn before—just jeans and a black turtle neck under a jean jacket—but for some reason it looked different up under the stage lights as he sat behind the drum set and sang.

You try to push away the thoughts surfacing in your mind as the night goes on, but it’s no use. You’re impossibly attracted to your best friend.

“They’re really good,” Winter leans over to say loudly in your ear and you just nod in response, eyes still focused on Jake.

When the show ends, you make your wave goodbye to your friends, who leave together, and push your way backstage, flashing the V.I.P. pass so they let you through. You walk down the hall to the dressing room where the four boys are freaking out about how amazing it felt to perform.

“Yn!” Jake cheers as he sees you enter the room. He stands immediately and rushes to hug you. “I’m so glad you came. You’re like my very own good luck charm.”

You smiled shyly as you hugged him back. “You were great, Jake. I don’t think you needed me here for you to be great.”

“I’m glad you were here regardless.”

“I’m glad I was able to come.”

“Okay,” Heeseung cleared his throat, and stood from the small couch in the back corner of the room. “Do you want us to stay to help clean up, or are the two of you going to do it?”

Sunghoon and Jay stood as well and Jake looked at you before turning back to Heeseung to answer, “I couldn’t make yn clean up after us. She didn’t—”

“I can stay and help Jake clean things up. You guys go on ahead and celebrate,” you interrupted him. Truthfully, you wanted to spend some time with just Jake and Heeseung was giving you the perfect opportunity for that.

“Are you sure? I won’t make you.”

“I want to. Let them go on ahead.”

So, he looked back at his friends and nodded. You gave each of them a short hug as they walked out of the dressing room, carrying their own instruments with them. You helped Jake clear trash and pack up the last of the equipment. At first, the two of you worked in silence. But the question that had been weighing on you for the last hour finally slipped past your lips.

“Have you ever had sex before?”

Jake choked on his spit and turned to look at you, eyes wide. Though the two of you were, obviously, very close, one thing you hadn’t ever really talked about was sex. It was, of course, a pretty awkward topic for two teenagers, hence why you had never brought it up before.

“Uh, yeah, a couple times, why?”

You shrugged, suddenly self-conscious. You’d never had the opportunity to go all the way with a boy. You didn’t really date in high school, focusing instead on doing well in school so you could get into a good college. But Jake didn’t need to know that, “No reason. I was just curious. You look good on stage. I’m sure lots of girls will be all over you soon enough.”

“Ah,” Jake shook his head, looking away from you again, cheeks burning, “I don’t know if I want girls to be all over me.”

You just hum and finish packing the equipment. “You really did do a great job today, Jake. I’m really proud of you.”

“Thank you,” his voice came softly, and he walked behind you to hug you again.

“I think that’s the last of it,” you looked at him with a small smile, “I should probably get going. Winter, Karina, and I are having a sleepover at Winter’s tonight. They’re already there waiting for me.”

He nodded and walked you outside, carrying the last of the band’s equipment along with him. He took your hand in his as he led you to your car after packing the equipment into his own car. When you reached your car, he kissed you on the top of your head and squeezed your hand. “We have another gig on Wednesday… if you want to come…”

“I’ll be there. Are you guys practicing any other days this week at all?”

“Yeah. Every day this week. So, we probably won’t be able to hang out much.” Jake sighed as he wrapped his arms around you, holding you close to him. He liked having you close like this. He liked having you in his arms.

“That’s okay,” you sighed as well, burying your head in his neck, “I’ll be there to watch your gig. We can hang out then. And maybe afterwards as well?”

“I’d like that.”

“Okay. I have to go. I’ll see you later, though, okay?” you pulled away, kissing him on the cheek and getting into your car. He waved as you started it and drove off and somehow, he couldn’t stop the aching feeling in his chest as you left.

𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊

“So, what’s up with you and Jake,” Karina asked as she painted her nails, sitting cross-legged on the floor of Winter’s bedroom.

“Nothing?” you looked over at her, your head cocked to the side in confusion, “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Winter giggled and glanced at you slyly, “I think she’s referring to the way you couldn’t take your eyes off of him all night.”

You felt your face heat up as you shook your head, playing with your fingers and looking anywhere but at your friends. You had admitted to yourself that you may have the tiniest (biggest) crush on your best friend, but you weren’t sure if you were ready to admit that to anyone else yet. Your biggest concern was that if you did end up telling him, he wouldn’t want to be friends with you anymore and everything would be awkward. And that was the last thing you wanted.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Deny it all you want,” Karina shrugged, “we still saw you. Anyone with eyes can see the way you two look at each other.”

“What do you mean,” you finally looked up at her again, brows furrowed as you thought about her words.

“I mean that both of you look at each other like you hung the stars in the sky. He looks at you like you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to him. And, especially tonight, you look at him like he’s the human form of a god. That and you tend to undress him with your eyes.”

Your jaw fell open at her words, “I do not!”

“You kind of do,” Winter chimed in, smirking.

You groaned, falling back on Winter’s bed and holding a pillow over your face as you screamed in embarrassment. But a part of you was relieved that they knew. You didn’t feel like you had to keep your feelings inside anymore.

“When did you know you liked him?” Karina asked, already back to painting her nails.

“I don’t really know. I kind of just… woke up one day and realized that I had a thing for him. To be honest, I think I’ve always kind of liked him. But I just told myself it was just a friendly sort of like…”

“I knew it!” Winter all but shrieked, clapping excitedly, “Oh my god, we have to get you guys together.”

“You should tell him you like him, yn. I’m like 99.9% sure that he likes you too. That 0.1% is just a precautionary so that if something goes wrong you can’t be mad at me. Otherwise, I would say 100%.” Karina laughed as you looked at her in shock, but she didn’t seem fazed by your dramatic look.

“Do you really think I could just go over to him like, “hey Jake, I really like you and I want to be more than friends”? Because the answer is no. I could not do that.”

“Well, I think you should,” Winter suggested, “You said they have another gig Wednesday. That’s the perfect time to do it!”

“Are you kidding me? That’s so soon!”

“The longer you wait, the less likely you’ll be to actually tell him,” Karina sighed and finally screwed the top of the nail polish bottle back on, blowing on her nails to help them dry faster, “Look. We just want you to be happy. You’d be happy in a relationship with Jake. And judging by the way he looks at you when you’re not looking, there’s a really high chance he would agree to being your boyfriend. Plus, you only have the summer before he leaves and goes to that school all the way on the East Coast. And of course, you’ll stay in contact because you’ve been friends for forever, but it won’t be the same. But if you finally start dating, you’ll be more inclined to actually keep in touch more.”

“Exactly. And if for some godforsaken reason he doesn’t want to be your boyfriend, we’ll be right here with ice cream and cuddles. We’ll always be here for you, yn. But you have to be brave sometimes,” Winter agreed, sitting down next to you on the bed and wrapping an arm around you.

You sighed and leaned into her touch. You knew they were right. And you did want to tell Jake about your feelings. It would be better than keeping them locked away inside. You just didn’t know how.

“Okay. I’ll tell him at the gig on Wednesday. Promise you’ll be there if it goes wrong?”

“Promise,” Karina smiled at you and Winter squeezed your shoulders. You closed your eyes, imagining what dating Jake Sim would be like. And the only thing that came to your mind was perfection.

𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊

This time, you stood off in the wings, watching Jake perform from offstage. And he was just as hot as before. His skin glistened under the stage lights, shiny from the sheen of sweat that covered him. He wore blue jeans and a black t-shirt that stretched tight across his chest under a black jean jacket. And his dark hair hung in his eyes as he played, the front pieces sticking to his forehead slightly. Just like the last time you had watched him, you couldn’t take your eyes off of him as he played and sang.

And though you didn’t notice, he kept sneaking glances at you too, noticing just how beautiful you were. He doesn’t even know when it happened—when he started thinking you were the most gorgeous girl he had ever seen. He just knew that he got up one day, saw you standing on your front porch waiting for him and knew that he didn’t want anyone except for you.

And now you were watching him play, standing off in the wings on the side of the stage in those blue jeans that suited your frame perfectly and white tank top. The outfit was so simple, but the icing on the cake was that you were wearing his windbreaker on top of it all. He looked away from you, biting his lip as he tried not to get hard in the middle of the performance. He just had to make it through two more songs and then he could find a bathroom like he so desperately needed.

When the show ended, he hurried off the stage, but you stopped him, “You did so good, Jake.”

“Ah, th-thanks yn.” He smiled and hugged you quickly before pulling away, heart aching at the small frown that tugged on your lips. “Sorry, I just… really need to use the bathroom.”

The frown was gone in an instant and you grinned sheepishly at him, “Right. Sorry. I’ll let you go then. I’ll just wait in the dressing room.”

He started toward the bathroom, but stopped when Heeseung, Sunghoon, and Jay walked past, already carrying their instruments and other equipment. Heeseung winked at him, whispering as he passed him, “You know, I’m sure she’d be willing to help you with your problem.”

Jake’s face flushed red, and he smacked Heeseung in the arm. He just laughed and walked away. Jake went to the dressing room instead of the bathroom, taking a deep breath before pushing open the door. He tried to keep his breathing even when he saw you laying sprawled out on the couch, your shoes kicked off and sitting on the floor beside the couch, reading a magazine that had been sitting on the coffee table.

“Oh, you were fast,” you looked up at him from the magazine. He locked the dressing room door behind him.

“Uh, yeah. I didn’t… I didn’t actually… go to the bathroom.”

You frowned a little, confused, “Oh.”

Jake sat next to you on the couch, and you sat up too, looking at him and taking in how hot he looked. And he did the same.

“You asked me a few days ago if I’ve ever had sex…” his voice trailed off before he cleared his throat and continued, “But you never answered the question yourself. Have you ever had sex?”

Your face grew hot almost immediately and you wanted to back away as his face got closer and closer to yours, but you didn’t move. You swallowed thickly, “N-no. I haven’t.”

“Really?” he looked surprised, his brows furrowed, and head tilted to the side.

“Is that really so shocking?”

“You’re hot as fuck. I’m surprised no one’s ever wanted to have sex with you.”

“I didn’t say that,” your eyes narrowed and somehow you didn’t quite catch on to the fact that he had called you hot. “I just never wanted to have sex with any of them.”

“Oh.”

You stayed like that for a moment, just staring at each other. He was so close at this point that you could feel his hot breath fanning across your face. His eyes were narrow, and you could see the lust in them at this point. And you were sure you were looking up at him the same way.

“You look really hot right now,” Jake whispered, scooting a little closer to you on the couch, “I kinda wanna kiss you.”

“Only kind of?” you teased, putting a hand on his knee and searching his eyes for any signs of discomfort. But he only looked at you with eyes clouded with desire.

“I really wanna kiss you.”

“Then do it.”

And that was all it took for him to lean in and press his lips to yours in a desperate kiss. His lips moved against yours expertly. You’d only kissed a handful of boys in your life and had made out with even fewer, but none of them had kissed you like Jake was kissing you.

He nipped at your bottom lip, and you groaned, opening your mouth enough for him to slide his tongue into it. His tongue worked against yours, exploring every inch of your mouth. He tasted a little bit like Starbursts—which made sense since he always ate Starbursts when he was nervous.

You pushed his jean jacket off of his shoulders as you continued to make out and he did the same to you, sliding his windbreaker off of your arms. You grabbed his face in both of your hands, holding him close to you and his hips involuntarily rolled into yours. He groaned at the friction, and you opened your legs a little wider to accommodate for his body in between them and so that you could feel his bulge against your core better.

“Fuck,” he moaned against your lips, continuing to grind his hips down into yours. “Fuck, I want you so bad, yn.”

“Want you too,” you gasped, your fingers tangling in the hair at the nape of his neck.

He sat up, tugging his t-shirt over his head, his broad chest on display for you. You propped yourself up on your elbows so you could pull your tank top off as well, leaving you in your bra. He leans in to kiss you again, reaching around behind you to unclasp your bra. You squeezed your eyes shut as he pulled away from you again to look at you now that your chest was completely exposed. You weren’t sure what he would think, but you were nervous to see him looking anyway.

“Look at me,” he whispered, holding your face gently until you opened your eyes to look at him. “You don’t have to hide from me. You’re beautiful.”

Your breath felt stuck in your throat at his words. Everything felt like a dream. You couldn’t believe that your best friend—the same best friend you realized you had feelings for—was telling you that you were beautiful. Of course, he had told you that you were beautiful before, but this was so different.

“Jake,” you breathed out, finally. But your words died out as he kissed you again, hands finding their way to your breasts and kneading them gently.

He leaned down and pressed sweet kisses to your neck, then to your collarbones, then your sternum, and then he sucked faint marks onto the swell of your breasts. “So, so beautiful, yn. You’re so perfect.”

You whined and then let your hands find their way to the zipper of his jeans. You fumbled blindly with it as he continued sucking marks onto your soft skin. After what felt like forever, you finally managed to tug the zipper down and then you pushed at his jeans. He stood up, slipping his shoes and socks off and tugging his jeans all the way off before climbing on top of you again on the small couch.

He pulled down the zipper of your jeans in return before pulling them slowly off of your legs and tossing them to the side. You reached down, pulling your socks off and dropping them beside your shoes on the floor. You felt shy again now that you were only in your underwear, but he ran his hands comfortingly over your legs and your hips and your sides and you felt at ease with him.

You looked up at his face again, searching his eyes, but for what you weren’t exactly sure. His eyes were still clouded with desire, but you knew he was thinking clearly in everything he was doing.

“You can tell me to stop and I will.” His voice came softly, pulling you abruptly from your thoughts, “It doesn’t matter how far into it we are, or if this is as far as we go. If you tell me to stop, I will.”

“Okay.”

“Do you want me to keep going?”

You nodded, grabbing his face again and kissing him, “Please keep going.”

“I have a condom in my bag,” he said softly, kissing your forehead, “I’m just gonna go get it, okay?”

“Okay.”

You watched as he climbed off of you and then crossed the dressing room to where his bag was, reaching into a pocket to grab the condom.

“Jake,” you called, and he looked back at you, “Won’t we get in trouble back here? What if they need the venue soon?”

Jake shook his head and smiled reassuringly at you. “I know the guy who runs the venue. We were the last people to use it. He left me the keys and asked me to lock up behind us. We’re the only ones here right now. But uh, just so you know, I didn’t… plan this… It just kinda worked out that way.”

He came back over to you, settling himself over you once more. You hung your arms around his neck as he held himself up.

“Can I take these off?” he asked, playing with the elastic band of your underwear. You nodded shyly and he pulled them down slowly, eyes fixed on your exposed folds. “Holy fuck. Fuck, you’re so beautiful.”

You squirmed shyly under his gaze, and he tore his eyes away from his core to look you in the eye. He took one of your arms from around his neck, and then the other one, and he brought your hands to the waistband of his boxers. You knew what he wanted and so, with a deep breath, you pulled his underwear off as well, immediately watching in curiosity as his dick sprung up, slapping lightly against his abdomen. He was perfect.

Though you hadn’t had sex before, you had seen a few dicks (the farthest you’d ever gone with a boy before this moment, though, was a blowjob). Jake’s was by far the best you’d ever seen. You felt like your mouth might start watering at any second, so you slowly looked up toward his face to find him with his bottom lip tucked between his teeth as he watched you.

“You have a really pretty dick,” you whispered, “Can I touch you?”

“Fuck, yeah. Touch me. Please.” His voice came out in a desperate whimper as his hips jerked forward toward your outstretched hand.

“So eager for someone to stroke your dick, hm?”

He shook his head, “No. Just you, yn.”

“Oh?” His words caught you by surprise. You figured everything was just a result of him being horny, that he was just desperate to get off. Hearing that it was you that had him all worked up was a bit surprising. But you couldn’t complain about that. It was like a dream come true.

So, you finally took his dick in your hand. You started by licking his shaft, trying to wet his dick to make it a little more pleasurable for him. You watched his face as you started off slow, stroking languidly from the base to the tip. You frowned a bit as you thought that it might feel better for him if you had lube, but since you doubted, he carried a bottle of it in his bag, you made do without it.

“Shit,” he groaned, throwing his head back as you continued, “Fuck, you’re really good at this.”

You only hummed in response, watching to make sure his reactions stayed positive. You sped up your pace a little and paid more attention to his tip, which he seemed to like as he started bucking his hips into your hand.

You felt his dick twitch in your hand and he sat up quickly, pulling at your wrists, “Fuck, wait, wait, wait.”

You stopped, looking up at him with wide eyes, worried you hurt him, but he only shook his head and panted heavily.

“Sorry. Sorry, I just… I don’t want to cum yet. Wanna cum when I’m fucking you.” He breathed heavily, trying to compose himself before he continued. “Can I touch you now?”

You nodded and he ran his finger through your folds. You shivered at the contact and willed yourself not to close your legs. He gently rubbed at your clit and around your entrance. When he pulled his fingers away to show you, they were so wet you could see them shine under the dim light of the dressing room.

“Fuck, look how wet you are. Is this just for me?”

You groaned, looking at him through hooded eyes, “Just for you, Jakey.”

“Gonna stretch you out now. Don’t wanna hurt you on your first time,” his voice was gentle but the look in his eyes was anything but. “Has anyone ever touched you here before?”

You nodded slowly, “Yeah, b-but it didn’t… didn’t feel that good…”

“It didn’t?” Jake asked, looking at you with concerned eyes.

“No. It wasn’t… bad… but it just didn’t… feel good.”

“Oh, baby,” he brought his fingers back to your core, rubbing gently, “then they must have been doing something wrong. Tell me to stop if it doesn’t feel good, okay?”

“Okay.”

He slowly pushed a finger into your entrance, watching your face carefully to make sure you were still doing alright. You whined a little, already loving the way he touched you more than you’d ever loved anything—already craving it. So, he pumped his finger in and out of you a few times to get you used to the feeling before slowly adding a second.

“Oh,” you gasped, and he paused, looking at you intently. “N-no, keep going. I just—I wasn’t expecting it to feel… like that.”

“Like what, baby?”

“Good.”

He continued pumping his fingers in and out of you, curling them upwards and prodding against that soft spot that had you seeing stars—something you’d never felt before. You gasped again and through the haze in your vision, you saw him smirk. “Found it. Does it still feel good, sweetheart?”

“Mhm,” you moaned, trying to keep your eyes open as his fingers continued to nudge your g-spot.

He hummed in acknowledgement and then stretched his fingers apart slowly, trying to stretch you open as carefully as he could. It stung for a moment but there was no denying the pleasure that followed. He watched your face as he continued scissoring his fingers to prepare you.

“Can you take one more?”

“Yes. Please,” you whined. At this point, the stretch was gone and all you felt was pleasure—you were desperate for more. No one had ever made you feel as good as Jake did. He didn’t answer as he fit one more finger inside of you, stretching you even further. But you were so wet that you hardly felt the sting this time. “Jake, please. Just want you.”

“You sure you’re ready sweetheart?”

“Yes, I’m sure,” you grabbed at his hand and looked into his eyes, trying to convince him that you were ready for him.

“And you’re sure you want this?”

“Yes, Jake.”

He took a deep breath and grabbed the condom packet from where it had fallen on the floor. He tore it open and took the condom out, rolling it down his length. You watched his fingers work the condom down his dick. He had such pretty hands. Everything about him was beautiful. You could look at him for hours.

“Okay, I’m gonna put it in now,” Jake murmured, positioning himself with the tip of his dick at your entrance, you grabbed one of his hands in yours, intertwining your fingers together and looking him in the eye as he started to push in.

It felt perfect. It was strange. You weren’t sure what you were expecting, but it felt so much better than you had imagined. He was perfect. He leaned down, groaning in your ear as he bottomed out inside of you. You let go of his hand, wrapping both of your arms around his neck and kissing him. Your brain felt fuzzy, but nothing hurt.

“You can move, Jake. Please move.”

Slowly, he started thrusting into you, his hips smacking into yours. You loved how full it felt. Even with the condom on, you felt like you could feel all of him. You loved how close he was to you, you loved the noises he made, you loved how good he was at sex, you loved everything about sex with him, and you started to wonder if maybe you loved him.

“Fuck, you feel so good. So good and tight for me, sweetheart,” he grunted over you, gradually increasing his pace.

The tip of his dick brushed against a spot inside of you that you weren’t even fully aware you had. And it felt like magic. You could feel that familiar knot starting to build in your stomach, and you felt guilty for not being able to last longer.

“Jake, I-I’m gonna… cum soon,” you managed to gasp out through deep moans.

“I want you to,” he mumbled back, kissing your neck and holding on to one of your hands again, “I want you to cum.”

You whined as he thrusted harder, trying to make you cum. But it wasn’t until he reached one of his hands down between your bodies and rubbed at your clit that you felt the knot tighten even more.

“Oh,” you groaned, your eyes squeezing shut at the feeling, “please, Jakey. Please, don’t stop.”

“I won’t, baby.”

It didn’t take long after that for you to reach your high. You came hard—something you’d never experienced before. You clenched hard around his dick as you rode your high, and that sent him over the edge too. You felt him fill up the condom inside of you before his hips stuttered to a stop and he pulled out carefully, disposing of the condom before collapsing beside you.

He brushed his fingers through your hair gently and held you close to him; both of your bodies were sticky with sweat. You breathed heavily as you breathed him in. He still smelled like his cologne.

“Come on, let’s get you home, sweetheart. Don’t want your parents to worry,” he murmured, kissing the top of your head sweetly, before standing up. “We don’t have any washcloths in here, but there are paper towels. Is that okay?”

“Y-yeah, that’s fine.”

He made his way to the sink and turned the temperature to hot. He tore off a few sheets of paper towel from the rack and got them wet in the warm sink water. He hurried back to you, crouching on the ground and carefully wiping the sticky evidence of your release from your core. You whined a bit at the contact, but he just squeezed your hand gently, “I know. I’m almost done, baby.”

With how sweet he was being to you, your hopes were high that he liked you the same way you liked him. After he finished cleaning you up, he quickly dressed himself before helping you back into your clothes as well. He let you sit on the couch as he finished picking up the dressing room. He helped you out of the concert venue, a hand on the small of your back, and then he locked the building behind him.

You had ridden to the venue with Jake that day, so thankfully you didn’t have to worry about driving back home. But once you were in the car together, you didn’t think you could just go home. Your chest felt tight and all you wanted was to lay with him in his bed and feel him close to you again.

“Jake.”

“Yeah, sweetheart?”

“Can I sleep over at your house? I’ll call my parents to let them know…” your voice trailed off before you cleared your throat to finish your train of thought, “I just want to stay with you tonight.”

He felt his heart melt at your words, and he nodded, “Yeah. Of course, you can stay over. Are you sure you don’t want to grab stuff from home first?”

“I don’t want to. I just want to be with you. I still have clothes at your house anyway.”

Jake just nodded and the rest of the drive to his house was silent except for the music playing through the car from the random cassette tape you had pushed into the player while he was packing stuff into the trunk of his car. He drove with one hand on the steering wheel and the other on the gear shift, but you wished that he would move his hand just a little more to the right so it would rest on your knee.

When he finally pulled into the driveway of his house, he told you to wait in the car while he unloaded the equipment from the concert and then he’d be back to help you. He was being so sweet, you had no choice but to listen to him. It didn’t take very long, thankfully, so after a couple minutes, he was back, opening your door and helping you walk up to the front door.

His parents weren’t home since they had an important business trip they were on. They were aware regularly for business trips in the summer, which Jake was used to, so it didn’t bother him that they weren’t home. When he was younger, he would stay at your house frequently when his parents were gone, but now that he was older, they trusted him to be alone.

Once you were back in Jake’s room, you slipped out of your jeans and collapsed on his bed in just your tank top and underwear. You didn’t see the blush that spread across his cheeks at the sight of you sprawled out in his bed in so little clothing.

“Don’t you want to change into pajamas?” he asked, trying to keep his voice steady as he grabbed his own pajamas from his closet.

“No,” you mumbled sleepily, “too tired. This’s fine.”

“Okay,” he said softly, changing quickly and then turning off the bedroom light before slipping into his bed beside you.

He pulled you close to him out of habit. The two of you weren’t strangers to physical touch with one another. You often cuddled together when watching movies. This was different though, and he realized that after a few minutes. This felt more intimate. By the time he noticed, though, you were already asleep, and he didn’t want to move and startle you awake, so he just closed his eyes, breathed deeply, and willed himself to sleep.

When you woke up again, it was morning. Soft morning light filtered through the crack between the curtains covering his window. He still had his arms around you, and you were warm. You curled your body closer to him, desperate for more of his warmth and to feel him all around you.

He breathed deeply and his eyes fluttered open. He looked down at you and smiled sleepily. “Good morning.”

“Morning,” you mumbled back. It was quiet between the two of you for a little longer until you sighed. “So, are we going to talk about last night?”

He swallowed nervously. He knew this moment was coming. He knew he was going to get rejected. But he played off the fear he felt, shrugging slightly, “I’d be okay with hooking up from time to time. If you want that, anyways.”

“Oh,” you whispered. You weren’t expecting that to be his answer. You weren’t actually sure what you were expecting, but Jake telling you he wanted to be your fuck buddy was not it.

“I-I mean, only if you want. I won’t like, force you to—”

“Okay.”

His eyes widened as he looked at you, “Okay?”

“Okay, we can… hook up sometimes.”

What you really wanted from him was a relationship. You wanted to call him your boyfriend. But since that seemed to be the last thing that he wanted, you would settle for this. After all, the sex was really good, and you were so head over heels for him that you were willing to do anything to have even a semblance of a relationship while still maintaining your friendship.

Jake smiled and hugged you closer to him, “Do you want to go to the beach later?”

“To surf?”

“No, just to go to the beach. We can swim or lay in the sun. It’s supposed to be a nice day today. I just want to relax.”

You nodded in agreement, “Okay. I should go back home then. My swimsuit is there.”

He let go of you (albeit, reluctantly) and watched as you waved playfully to him after pulling your pants and shoes on again.

As soon as you stepped into your house, your mom looked up at you from where she sat on the couch, reading a magazine. “You didn’t come home last night.”

And that’s when you realized you totally forgot to call her when you got to Jake’s house. You opened your mouth to answer, but nothing came out. She sighed and put the magazine back on the coffee table in front of her.

“You’re lucky I saw Jake helping you inside his house, otherwise I would’ve called the cops and sent out a search party for you.” You felt embarrassed that your mom had witnessed Jake helping you stumble into his house, but more than that, you felt terrible that she had worried. “It’s fine for you to stay out late and it’s okay for you to spend the night at Jake’s, but I would appreciate at least a phone call, so I know you’re safe. I get that you’re an adult now and you’re leaving for college soon, but I’m still your mom and you’re still living here. I just want to know you’re okay.”

You nodded and swallowed, “I’m sorry I didn’t call, mom. I was really tired. We were at the concert venue until late. It completely slipped my mind to call you.”

“It’s okay. Please just try to remember next time.”

“Okay.” You started toward your bedroom, but stopped before you got there, turning to face your mom, “Jake and I are going to the beach today. I don’t know when I’ll be home.”

She just nodded, already back to reading the magazine. You let out a deep sigh of relief that she didn’t seem upset anymore and quickly changed into a swimsuit. It was a colorful two piece that Karina and Winter had convinced you to buy, and it was definitely showier than the classic white one you had worn the last time you’d gone to the beach with Jake. But you wanted to impress him. So, you took a deep breath and slipped the swimsuit on, covering it with a pretty white sundress so you weren’t walking around in only the swimsuit.

You met Jake outside after you brushed through your hair and got your beach bag together. He was waiting leaned against his car in only his swim shorts and a pair of flip flops. You forced yourself not to stare at his toned stomach and you forced yourself not to remember the night before. He glanced you over as you came skipping towards him, but you didn’t notice. Once you were in front of him, you wrapped your arms around him, hugging him and sighing in content. You liked being close to him. “Hi.”

“Hi,” he whispered back, grinning at you. He kissed the tip of your nose and then let go of you, opening the car door for you and shutting it once you were inside the car.

The two of you turned the music up all the way on the drive to the beach, like you always did. This time, though, your heart was soaring, and you couldn’t get rid of the huge smile on your face because his hand was on your knee like you’d wanted it to be the night before. He had the windows rolled down and both of you were singing and smiling as he drove.

The beach was more crowded than the last time you had gone together. But you didn’t mind. You set your towels out on the beach in a spot that was half sunny and half shady, just in case you got too warm or started to burn. You slipped your sundress off and almost giggled at the way Jake’s eyes fixed themselves on your body, staring until he realized what he was doing, and his face turned red. He helped you apply sunscreen, and you did the same for him and then you just laid there in the sun, enjoying his company and the warmth of the day.

“Let’s go swim!” Jake cheered after you had both been laying in the sun for a while, “It’s getting too hot in the sun.”

You sat up, “Okay, okay.”

He smiled even wider and pulled you to your feet, dragging you down to where the water lapped against the sand. You giggled as he waded in until the water was up to his waist, waving for you to join him. But as you were about to join him, someone tapped on your shoulder and you turned, facing a boy who had graduated from the same school as you and Jake. His name was Jeongin, if you remembered right.

Truthfully, you thought he was kind of cute, but you hadn’t ever been that attracted to him. He smiled charmingly at you before he proceeded to speak, “Hey, yn, how are you?”

“Oh,” you were surprised that he was even talking to you. You’d never spoken back when you were in school together, “I’m good, how are you?”

“Good, good. So, this might be kind of random, but I was wondering if you wanted to go on a date with me tonight? I’ve always thought you were gorgeous and when I saw you here, I knew I couldn’t pass up the chance to ask you out.”

“Oh, um,” you turned to look back towards Jake who had his head cocked to the side and his brows furrowed as he watched you. For a moment, you wondered if you should turn Jeongin down since you had just agreed to hook up with Jake occasionally. But that made you realize that you and Jake weren’t even in a relationship. So why should you turn down a cute guy who was interested in you? “Yeah, sure. What time?”

“I’ll pick you up around eight? Is that okay?”

“Sounds perfect, Jeongin. I’ll see you at eight.”

“Oh, hey, before you go,” he grabbed your arm stopping you, “What’s your address?”

You felt embarrassed that you had forgotten to tell him, so you blushed and pulled your arm away, telling him the address slowly so he could write it down on a piece of paper he had in his hand. You waved as he jogged away, joining a group of boys who must have been his friends. You finally waded out into the water to join Jake, grinning widely.

“Jeongin just asked me on a date!”

“Yeah, I noticed,” he grumbled. You didn’t understand why he was acting so upset about it. After all, it wasn’t like the two of you were dating or anything. You just brushed it off, figuring maybe he was just upset that you had intruded on his time with you. He noticed your small frown at his words and his face softened. He hugged you. “I’m happy for you. And if anything goes wrong, I’ll be there for you.”

The two of you splashed around and swam for a little longer before you got tired of playing around and Jake had to go to the bathroom. You both made your way back to the sand and you settled yourself on your towel as he made his way to the public restroom.

While he was in the stall (even though it was faster, he wasn’t a huge fan of the urinals), he heard a group of guys walk in. One voice was familiar to him, so he peeked through the crack in the stall door. Is that Jeongin?

“Dude, I can’t believe she agreed to go on a date with you,” one of his friends laughed loudly.

Another one laughed along, “Yeah, if I was her, I would have laughed in your face and told you to get lost.”

“Wow, what supportive friends I have,” Jeongin rolled his eyes, shoving one of them playfully.

The first guy shrugged and talked again, “I’m just saying, you have a well-known reputation for screwing girls over. I’m surprised you even asked her on a date to begin with. That’s unlike you.”

“Oh, trust me, this is only going to be a one-time thing. I’m not interested in dating her. I just want to fuck her. But she doesn’t strike me as the type of girl to just say yes if I were to ask her to come have sex with me.”

Jake couldn’t stand listening to them anymore, so he flushed the toilet, quickly washed his hands without looking at the group of boys and hurried out of the bathroom, making his way quickly back to where you were.

“Yn, I have to tell you something about Jeongin—”

“Ugh, please don’t give me the talk again. Jake, you’re not my dad. Yes, I’ll be careful, yada yada yada. I don’t need you telling me who I can or can’t date. It’s not up to you to decide.”

“No, I wasn’t going to—”

“Can we go home please? I just want to hang out there.”

He had tried to warn you about what he had heard Jeongin saying, but it was obviously no use. You were too blinded by excitement to listen to him. You didn’t sing along to the music playing in Jake’s car on the way back. You couldn’t understand why he was upset. You weren’t dating. He obviously didn’t have feelings for you like you did for him.

When you got back to your house, you let Jake hang out still. After all, the two of you were still friends. And he didn’t know you liked him, so you couldn’t be petty and act angry at him without coming clean about your feelings. So, instead you spent the day watching movies again, telling each other stories you still somehow didn’t know about each other, and Jake even helped you paint your nails for your date later that evening.

Finally, the time had come. There was only about half an hour until Jeongin would be there to pick you up. You were just finalizing what you were wearing, touching up your hair, and choosing accessories for your date. But Jake figured it was time to try and warn you again.

“Yn, I really need to tell you something.”

“Do you think he would prefer the gold necklace or the silver one?” you asked, not even paying attention to what he had said before.

Jake was always patient with you, though, so he just sighed. “I would pick the gold, but I don’t know much about him, so I don’t really—”

“Gold it is.”

“Seriously, yn, I need to—”

“Which shoes do you like better, Jakey?” you interrupted him again and he frowned, growing more and more frustrated.

“The second ones are nice. But like I was saying—”

This time he was cut off by the sound of the doorbell ringing and he groaned in frustration as you tugged your shoes on, hugging him quickly. He kissed your forehead softly, whispering a small, “be careful” into your ear before you left, kissing your mother on the cheek. Jake watched as you left with Jeongin and then he kissed your mother on the cheek as well before crossing the street to his own empty house.

In the car with Jeongin, you looked through the cassette tapes in his glove box. You frowned when you noticed he didn’t have any of the artists you typically listened to. You just picked a random one and were surprised by the slow, sensual music that filled the car. You shrugged it off though. Music taste was just a small thing in comparison to more important things like personality.

The date was going really well at first. He took you to a diner for dinner and paid for your food. He opened doors for you and acted like a complete gentleman. You felt like you had a lot in common other than your taste in music and he seemed like such a sweetheart. You almost didn’t want the night to end as he helped you into his car to drive you home.

But things started to go wrong when you were about halfway back to your neighborhood. He pulled his car into an empty convenience store parking lot and sat there, just looking at you.

“Jeongin? Why’d we stop? What’s wrong?” You were confused. You didn’t understand why he had pulled into the empty parking lot or why he was just looking at you with such a terrifying look in his eyes. You wondered if maybe he was a psychopath and if this was how you would die.

He didn’t answer your questions. He just leaned in closer to you, unbuckling your seatbelt and pulling your face closer to him so he could kiss you. You were shocked. You hadn’t expected him to kiss you tonight since it was only your first date. And you weren’t even home yet.

At first you closed your eyes, leaning into him. You were fine with kissing a little. He was cute, after all and after your experience with Jake the night before, you liked the feeling of kissing just a little bit more. But when his hand creeped from your side to the bottom of your dress you started to panic. Was he going to touch you? You didn’t want him to touch you. You weren’t ready for that.

His hand slid up your leg, closer to your core and you tried to push him off. At first, he didn’t move but the more you struggled against him, pushing at his hands and his chest, the easier it was to get him off. When you finally managed to get him off of you, you scrambled to get out of the car, sobbing as you started to walk home. You couldn’t stand to be in there with him for another minute.

He drove his car slowly next to you as you walked. “Yn, baby, I’m sorry. Just get back in the car, I’ll take you home, I promise.”

“Stay away from me, you bastard.”

He scoffed at your answer, “Fine.”

You cried as he drove away, speeding way too fast down the road. You were grateful that the convenience store you had been at was only a seven-minute walk from your neighborhood. You tried not to cry too much as you walked. You wanted to be aware of your surroundings since it was dark outside and getting late.

When you finally made it to your neighborhood, you looked over at your house and then over at Jake’s and you decided you didn’t want to go home. You let yourself into his house, knowing it would be unlocked since he had mentioned he would be waiting for your date to be over. He was sitting on the couch reading a book and when you walked in, red-eyed and sniffling, he looked up.

You immediately sit down on the couch next to him, curling into his side and sobbing. “I-I should’ve fucking l-listened to you. You w-were trying to tell me about h-him, weren’t you?”

“Yn…” Jake’s voice was soft as he rubbed your back. He stood up and you watched with wide teary eyes as he walked toward the phone. “Wait for just a second, baby. I’m just going to tell your mom you’re here with me.”

So, you waited while he talked to your mom, explaining briefly what had happened when you had come over. He assured her that he would take care of you, and have you call her in the morning when you felt better. When he hung up, he came back to the couch, cuddling with you as you cried until you had no tears left.

“Jake,” you mumbled as you clung to him, now sitting on his lap, “can we have sex?”

He looked at you, eyes wide in surprise before his face softened. You were just desperate to forget the way Jeongin’s hands had felt against you. You want Jake to make you forget.

“Sweetheart, I don’t think that’s the best idea, right now,” he said softly, combing his fingers through your hair gently and kissing your cheeks.

“Why not?”

“You just came in crying because some dick just tried fucking you. I don’t think it’s a good idea for me to have sex with you when that’s the reason you’re upset in the first place.”

“But I want to have sex with you. I didn’t want to have sex with him. That’s the difference.”

“Still, I don’t think tonight is the best night.”

You sighed. You were upset because now that you were seated on top of him, breathing him in so deeply, you were horny. But his reasoning made sense so you couldn’t argue with him. So instead, you let him guide you to his bedroom, change you into your pajamas, and cuddle you to sleep.

You woke up the next morning with a pounding headache, thanks to the hours of crying and lack of hydration from the night before. You sat up slowly, looking over at Jake who slept peacefully beside you. Your heart pangs in your chest and your stomach churns. You couldn’t help but wonder what would happen to the two of you when the summer ended. Your friends with benefits relationship would obviously have to end since you were going to be on opposite sides of the country, but what would happen to your actual friendship?

“What are you thinking about?” Jake asked, mumbling in his sleepy state.

“What’s going to happen to us when the summer is over. We’re going to be so far away from each other.”

Jake pulled you down so that you were laying in his arms again. “I don’t know what’s going to happen when the summer ends, but I promise that you’re not going to get rid of me so easily. You’re stuck with me as a friend whether you like it or not.”

Right. As a friend.

You didn’t say anything in response, caught up in your thoughts once again. Jake fell asleep afterwards, though, too tired from how late the two of you had stayed up the night before. When you were sure he was asleep, you slipped carefully out of his bed, collecting your things and crossing the street to your own house.

After greeting your mother, you made your way to the kitchen, dialing Karina’s number first, then Winter’s. “Hey. Can we meet up today?”

𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊

Jake woke up again, but you weren’t there anymore. He rubbed the sleep out of his eyes and sat up. He looked around his house, but you weren’t there anymore, and all of your things were gone. So, he figured you had gone back home. He showered and got ready. He had band practice later.

Once he was completely ready, he dialed your house, wanting to ask if you wanted to come to practice with him. But no one answered the phone. He put the phone back on the receiver and gathered everything he needed for practice, loading it all into his car and then crossing the street. He knocked on your door, but the person who answered the front door was your mother, not you.

Jake frowned, “Is yn here?”

“Oh, no, she’s not. She went to hang out with Karina and Winter. I thought she told you.” You mother looked just as confused as he felt. You and Jake always told each other everything. Even if it was just something like this.

“That’s okay. Thanks anyway. Uh, when she comes back, if I’m not back yet, just… let her know that I’m at Heeseung’s for practice.”

Your mother nodded and watched as Jake quickly crossed the street again, getting into his car and driving away. She sighed. She knew something was up this morning when you returned.

𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊

“Wait, and you just agreed to be hook-up buddies?” Karina asked you, eyes wide as saucers as you finished your story.

You groaned, burying your face in a pillow, “I know, it was stupid of me. But it was just… so good and I really just… wanted to be with him, you know. It was stupid. But I don’t know what to do now.”

“You know,” Winter started, and you looked at her, “you could always do what we tried to tell you to do in the first place and, oh, I don’t know, tell him you like him.”

“It’s not that simple now. I don’t think I can do it.”

“Well, that’s about all I can think of as far as helping you,” Winter huffed, crossing her arms.

Karina sighed and put a soothing hand on your shoulder, “I don’t really have advice for you either. Winter’s is probably the best you’re going to get from us.”

“I just… I’m sure he’s doing just fine without me, and that’s what’s killing me.”

But he was, in fact, not doing fine without you. And his friends could see that.

“Dude, that’s eighth time you’ve screwed up the tempo today,” Sunghoon groaned, taking the bass guitar off and setting it in its stand before crossing the room and sitting on the couch in Heeseung’s garage.

“Yeah,” Jay mumbled, taking his guitar off as well, “What’s up with you today, man?”

“Is everything okay?” Heeseung asked, sitting beside Sunghoon on the couch.

Jake sighed and rubbed a hand over his face, “I’m sorry guys. I guess I’m just a little distracted.”

“A little?” Sunghoon scoffed, yelping when Heeseung punched him in the arm with a glare.

“What’s got you so distracted?” Jay asked, taking a sip from his water bottle as he watched Jake stand from behind the drum set.

“It’s yn.” The boys all looked at each other before breaking out into smirks and laughter. Jake frowned, “What’s so funny about that?”

“It’s nothing, what’s up with yn?” Heeseung shook his head, brushing off their odd behavior.

“We had sex a few nights ago,” Jake paused as the boys cheered for him, “and she acted like she was going to reject me so I… offered for us to be friends with benefits. And she agreed, but now I kind of feel like she’s blowing me off. I mean, she did go on a terrible date last night, so maybe that’s it, but I… I feel like she’s upset with me for some reason.”

The laughter stopped at Jake’s explanation. And finally, Jay spoke, “Oh, I’m sorry man. I don’t really… know what to say to make you feel better, but I’m here for you. Hopefully she just needs space because of that shitty date, but if she continues to ignore you, we’ll be here to support you no matter what.”

Heeseung and Sunghoon murmured in agreement, nodding their heads and Jake smiled a little at them. He was grateful to have such supportive friends. Heeseung suggested they end practice early, which Jake was grateful for. But then he didn’t see or hear from you at all that day.

Or the next day. Or even the day after that. It was like you were actively trying to avoid him. And that was killing him. So, he finally decides to wait out on his front porch for you. Every time he had gone to your house you weren’t there, but every time he had looked out his window, you weren’t coming or going. He didn’t know what to do. So, he settled for waiting on his porch until you finally showed yourself.

He was reading a book, bored as hell, when you finally walked out of your house. He scrambled out of his seat on the porch and ran across the road to stop you from getting in your car.

“Yn!”

You looked at him, eyes wide before you fumbled with the lock on your car, trying to get it to open. But he grabbed your wrist stopping you.

“Jake, I have to go to the store for my mom.”

“Tell me what the fuck is going on first,” he begged, eyes searching for yours, but you refused to look at him.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, Jake.”

It hurt that your answers were so short and that they left your lips so harshly. His eyebrows furrowed and his mouth fell into a small pout, “You’ve been avoiding me, yn.”

“No, I haven’t.”

“Yes, you fucking have. For the past three days. Yn, you’re my best friend. Do you know how much that fucking hurts?”

You finally looked up at him, tears brimming in your eyes, “Of course I do! Do you think it’s easy for me to just ignore you? It’s not. But I have to because I—”

You cut yourself off and his gaze softened. “Because you?”

“I fucking like you,” you finally whispered, the tears falling over your cheeks. “I like you so much and all I am to you is a friend. And it really, really sucks.”

“Yn—”

“And after we had sex I just—I knew that if we really did try the fuck buddies thing, I wouldn’t be able to take it. Losing my virginity to you was everything I ever dreamed of and it was perfect and you were perfect. And it just made me realize just how big my feelings for you are.”

“Yn, I—”

“And it’s okay,” you sighed, wiping your tears with the back of your hand, “I know you don’t like me the way I like you—”

“Yn, will you fucking listen to me?” Jake finally interrupted you, grabbing your face to make you look at him. You don’t say anything as he looks into your eyes. “I like you. I like you so much and I’ve liked you for so long. Please don’t try to tell me I don’t, because I do.”

You didn’t say anything, you just kissed him. You didn’t care that you were outside where anyone could see you. You didn’t care that your mom was probably watching out the window. All you cared about was that Jake liked you.

You pulled away, head spinning, “Wait here.”

You ran back into your house to tell your mom you were going to hang out with Jake and ask if she could get the groceries instead. She didn’t look up from her magazine when she waved you off, telling you to have fun and be safe. Truthfully, your parents and his had been waiting for this moment for years (they had been convinced that you would end up married at some point).

When you got back outside, he was leaning against your car and you grabbed his hand as you walked past him, dragging him to his house and pulling him inside. When the door was closed behind him, you grabbed his face and kissed him again, “I want you fuck me.”

But he shook his head, and you felt your heart sink. “I don’t want to fuck you. I want to show you how much I love you. And that’s going to be a lot different.”

You felt your heart soar again and you pressed yourself into him again to kiss him fervently. As you kissed, he guided you back to his bedroom and both of you slipped out of your shoes on the way. He slid his tongue into your mouth as you pushed the open flannel he was wearing off of his shoulders and he pulled your jacket off of your arms as well, tossing it somewhere in his bedroom.

He pulled away from you to tug his t-shirt over his head and you pulled your own shirt off, immediately attaching yourself to him again, kissing him so hard you wondered if your lips would be bruised the next day. His hands were all over you, never settling in one place for too long.

You reached for the button on his jeans, undoing it in one swift motion and pulling down the zipper before pushing his jeans off of his hips as he reached to undo the button and zipper on your pants as well. When you were both only in your under, Jake tugged you down onto his bed, still kissing you desperately.

“I love you,” he gasped as you palmed him through his pants.

He kissed your neck, sucking gently at your skin and leaving little love bites in his wake. He kissed down your chest, unclasping your bra and throwing it behind him in the process. He kissed your stomach and your hips and then he kissed the insides of your thighs, leaving marks there too.

“Fuck, I love you so much,” he whispered, “I’m so sorry it took me so long to realize it. I’m so sorry I didn’t tell you before.”

He kissed up your thighs, getting closer to your core with each kiss until he pressed a small one to your clit through your underwear. You whined, throwing your head back and tangling your fingers in his hair.

“Can I eat you out?” he asked softly, looking up at you through his eyelashes from between your legs. The sight alone was almost enough to make you cum. You nodded quickly in response and groaned in frustration as he pulled your underwear down your legs ever so slowly. He smirked at your impatience. “Baby’s getting a little needy, isn’t she?”

“Hm,” you hummed, squeezing your eyes shut, “I just want you.”

“Then open your eyes,” he murmured, and you could feel his warm breath against your core.

You were already dripping, but his voice, lower than you’d ever heard it, and his breath against you had you even wetter. You willed yourself to open your eyes, looking at him through fluttering lashes. He attached his lips to your clit, sucking gently, slowly.

“Oh, Jake,” you whined, fingers still threaded through his soft hair.

He gradually started sucking harder, increasing the pressure and drawing you closer to your high. He was messy. His spit was everywhere, mixed with your arousal. And he was noisy too. Slurping and sucking and humming. You were seeing stars for the second time in your life, and you gripped his hair harder as you approached your high, too far gone to warn him. But you felt him smile against your body as he helped you ride out your high.

When he pulled away, chin shiny and dripping with your release, you wondered if there was a more beautiful sight than this. He wiped at his chin with the back of his hand and then he pulled his own underwear off. He leaned over and pulled a condom out of his bedside table, rolling it over his hard length, already dripping pre-cum.

He laid back over you, rubbing his length through your folds to lubricate it. You whined, pulling him closer, “Want you inside.”

“Just a second baby,” he groaned.

And then he pushed himself inside, slowly so he didn’t hurt you. You clung to his shoulders tighter, holding him as close to you as you possibly could; holding him so close the two of you molded into one, so close nothing could break you apart.

“God, you’re still so tight,” he huffed, kissing your neck as he laid still inside of you. “So tight, just for me.”

“Jakey, move. Please.”

You didn’t have to tell him twice, because as soon as he had your permission, he was thrusting into you. His pace was already faster than last time, each thrust deep and precise. You felt like you were on cloud nine.

“I love you so much,” he moans in your ear, nibbling softly at your neck, “I love you, I love you, I love you.”

“I love you, Jake,” you gasped back, tears falling down your cheeks.

He was right about this time being different from the last. Last time you were both horny as hell but this time he was showing you just how much he loved you. It was almost overwhelming.

“Jake, I’m gonna cum,” you whined, clutching onto his back now as he thrust his hips into you.

“Me too, baby.”

He rolled his hips a couple more times and then you came for the second time, crying out his name and holding onto him tightly. Your high triggered his and his hips stilled as he came hard, face buried in the crook of your neck as he moaned.

“I love you, yn,” he whispered again, not pulling out of you yet.

“I love you, too.” You kissed him, and as you did, he wiped the tears from your cheeks.

He pulled out after you laid back down. You watched as he stood on shaky legs to discard the condom and get a warm washcloth. He wiped your release off of you and cleaned the sweat from your skin before helping you to the bathroom so you could pee. And once you were done, he helped you back to the bed and laid beside you, wrapping the comforter around the both of you and holding you close to him.

The sun was starting to set outside. You left small kisses across his chest as the two of you cuddled. Your voice was soft when you finally spoke, “So, what are we?”

Jake laughed and kissed the top of your head, “Well, we sure as hell aren’t gonna be fuck buddies anymore because that’s not enough for me.”

“So then…”

“Fuck, yn, just say you’ll be my girlfriend, please,” he whined, pouting at you.

You giggled as you kissed his cheeks sweetly, “Okay, I’ll be your girlfriend.”

He couldn’t hold back the grin on his face as he leaned down and pressed a small kiss to your lips. And another. And then another and another until he was peppering hundreds of small kisses all over your face. You laughed, pushing him away a little to get him to stop. And he did.

You both laid in silence for a few more moments until your thoughts started to get the better of you. You thought about how the summer was ending in just a couple more months. You thought about how perfect Jake was. You thought about how much it sucked that just when you finally made him your boyfriend you were going to have to leave him.

You didn’t even realize you were crying until he held your face gently in his hands, looking into your eyes, “Fuck, what’s wrong? Did I hurt you?”

“No,” you whispered, shaking your head and smiling at him through your tears, “You were perfect. You are perfect.”

“Then what’s wrong? Why are you crying?”

“What are we going to do when the summer ends and you leave for college?”

𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊

꒰ t a g l i s t ꒱ || ⤹ bolded accts couldn’t be tagged

You don’t know why, but for some inexplicable reason, he always makes you fall in love with the wrong people. Such as Lee Taeyong from eighth grade, or your failed relationship with Kim Jisoo from your biology class in high school — a pretty girl, but you were as compatible as Mentos and Coca-Cola. Hell, there was even Jung Sungchan from senior year, who you naturally drifted away from during an exam period. They’re all chapters in your book now, but you’re currently stuck on the one about your best friend, Lee Haechan.

It seems like you’re Cupid’s mortal enemy, too. You and Haechan are always side by side, down one another’s throats, there’s no way his arrow could have hit you and missed Haechan.

Perhaps, it’s a hole you dug yourself in. Via mutual friends, when you were seventeen, you met Lee Haechan — jock, senior, and the most beautiful boy you’ve ever seen. There was an instant connection between you two, all it took was a convo at a party about coincidentally both failing the same math exam, and you quickly became friends and close enough to pour out your heart into little rants whenever there was something personal bothering either of you, and you needed an outlet. You liked him because he understood you. He was patient with you. You see, you aren’t the best at communicating how you feel, and he never makes you feel bad about it.

You remember breaking up with your then-boyfriend, Jung Sungchan, and while you weren’t heartbroken since you saw it coming and all the love had evaporated by then, you were devastated that you no longer had someone to kiss. That being your main concern made Haechan laugh. He thought it was the most you thing ever.

“Can I kiss you, then?” you asked, a little grin on your face, although you were very serious. It wouldn’t be the end of the world, kissing your best friend. He has pretty lips, and it isn’t like it’ll mean anything, you think. It’s just one kiss.

Haechan scoffed, biting off the last remaining piece of his Tootsie Pop off the stick. You’re kidding, he thinks. Why would you seriously want to kiss him? And after breaking up with your now ex-boyfriend? The wound’s still fresh. “You wouldn’t dare.”

To Haechan’s surprise, you dared.

He tasted like chocolate, exactly like a Tootsie Pop, as expected of him. You didn’t mind, though. You never do. It was fun, you liked the way Haechan held you in his lap and kissed you back with fierceness, and he still kisses you with that same passion, like there’s no tomorrow.

And that’s the problem. One kiss turned into more than you can count on your fingers and toes.

Fast-forward four years later, you’re still best friends with Lee Haechan, only this time you’re in college, and have the fattest, most gigantic crush on him. Somewhere along the way, those lines between love and friendship were blurred. It’s impossible to pinpoint when, but you fell deep and hard for your best friend.

And the worst part? You doubt he’ll ever reciprocate those feelings.

Should you continue making out with your best friend who doesn’t reciprocate your romantic interest in him? Probably not.

Are you still going to, though? Absolutely.

“Y/n, I’m going to kill you,” Haechan states as he stumps inside the dining room. His hair is tussled since he’s just waken up from a nap, but you like this raw side of him. He looks gorgeous, and despite him basically threatening to murder you you still want to kiss him.

“Romantic,” you deadpan, training your eyes back on your laptop. It takes everything in you not to stare, but if you want to keep your feelings low-key, you need to follow a couple of rules.

“I know you took my Tootsie Pop. Where is it?”

You smirk a little, but it quickly fades into a line. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Okay, so maybe that’s a lie, and you both know it. You aren’t the only other person in the house, but Jungwoo, Haechan’s stepbrother, is asleep and wouldn’t cut his nap time short to do something as stupid as stealing the last of his brother’s favorite candy. That leaves you. As his best friend, you’re the first person to know Haechan turns murderous over those stupid lollipops, and that he’s the last person to know how many licks it takes to get to the center of a Tootsie-Pop. In your personal opinion, they’re not even that good. But he’s loved them ever since you’ve known him.

“We’re best friends, y/n. I know when you’re lying,” he remarks, and doesn’t give you the chance to answer before he persists, “where is it?”

There’s only one way out of this.

Run.

Haechan follows almost automatically, and in spite of being barely awake he obviously has the upper hand because he’s always leaned more towards the sport-y side. This doesn’t deter you though, because you have a getaway plan.

In your attempt to somehow outrun a man that used to do track and field, you make a beeline for the backyard door. He’s not going to outrun you in the grass in slippers, you think as you turn to see if he’s caught up on you. You’re in the lead, albeit barely, with your body almost being in arms reach. You try to pick up your speed, and once you reach the door you hurry to turn the knob. Except, there’s one, itty-bitty problem.

The door is fucking locked.

And you already know you won’t have time to open it, so you cave in to defeat, whirling around with your hands up in a surrendering pose. Your plan’s backfired; you’ve been caught.

“Oh, I’ve got you now,” Haechan says cockily. He has you—hook, line, and sinker, and at this point you aren’t even upset. You can’t be upset. His eyes are on you, and his body is close to yours, dangerously so.

“Okay, you win. Happy?” You murmur.

“Not until I get my Tootsie Pop back,” he shakes his head, “now where is it?”

Smiling, you shrug. Of course, you know where the candy is, but he’s either going to have to win or pry the answer out of you.

Then, he steps even closer, and your heart starts pounding in your chest twenty times faster than your feet were against the hardwood. This isn’t your first rodeo, you’ve made out with your best friend countless times, yet the anticipation gives you a rush, like you’ve never done this before. It makes you feel like a teenager in love all over again — seventeen, young and head over heels in love with the man closest to you.

He backs you into the door, and you can’t keep your eyes off his lips. Beautiful, plush, soft, and your eyes flutter shut as you prepare to feel the same skilled pair against your own, closer, and closer, and closer—

Crunch.

“I fucking knew it!” Haechan yells, jolting your eyes open. You aren’t even given the opportunity to register the situation before his hands are digging into your back pocket, retrieving his fortunately unharmed Tootsie Pop.

It feels like he’s gone before you can even blink, and realizing he’s slipped back into the hall, you begin to follow him into his room. “Hey!” you yell, and he doesn’t say anything, just looking up at you from his gaming chair with that damn candy hanging from his mouth, “why didn’t you kiss me?”

“Why’d you steal my Tootsie Pop?”

Okay, that was stupid, yes, but there was a particular goal in mind which was reached, even if for a short-lived moment.

You frown, “I wanted your attention.”

Haechan shakes his head, laughing. “C’mere.”

Somehow, those words never fail, making you melt and slip into his lap effortlessly every time. You’re like Jell-O to his voice, to his touch, to his whole. You’re a goner, some would say, and a part of you is alright with never coming back if it means you get to feel all the weird, Cupid-y emotions he makes you feel.

At this point, you don’t think you’ll ever stop kissing Haechan. In the time that you’ve been together, you’ve both been in relationships, hence putting the make out sessions on hiatus. They were never really long though, because you’d break up with them and inevitably find your way back to one another in the end.

His fingers guide your chin up, and once more your eyes flutter shut as his lips unite with yours. Haechan kisses in a manner that contrasts with the soft feeling of his lips. He always starts off gentle, but there’s a hunger that overcomes him as he stands up and pushes you against his desk, rough yet graceful and holding you so firmly, like you’re glass, but he wants to break you. And when he shatters you into all those tiny pieces, you don’t care. You want him to glue you back together and do it all over again. He’s intoxicating, he’s an addictive drug, but he tastes like candy, and you can’t stop coming back to him. He feels like home, the place where you belong. The place where you can be one-hundred percent, authentically you, safe and whole, more than the general perception than you. And fuck, does he kiss like the damn devil himself.

You were silly for ever believing it would only be one kiss.

Jungwoo thinks that for people who are trying to keep their not-so relationship-y relationship under wraps, you two are very loud.

Speaking of which, and despite the nature of your relationship, you and Haechan haven’t even discussed your label. You know that you aren’t friends with benefits—you haven’t crossed that line, but to be honest, those lines have been starting to look blurry for a while—but you also aren’t in a relationship. You see other people, you fuck other people, and when other people ask if you’re dating, you both deny it immediately. You’re just best friends, you both say each time like some rehearsed line, even if it breaks your heart to hear him friendzone you.

Karina and Mark even have an ongoing bet about you two. Karina is one-hundred percent positive there’s something going on, whereas Mark is probably the only person in the world that wants to give you guys the benefit of the doubt.

“For heaven’s sake, I can’t get any type of sleep around here,” Jungwoo rasps, leaning against the doorframe, “I really hope you guys don’t do this shit when Dohwan’s here.”

His judgmental eyes practically bore into your soul, and you thank heaven that you don’t have to worry about keeping this secret from Jungwoo, even if he would probably appreciate it more if you did. He finds you in a rather interesting position, straddling Haechan’s lap as you press kisses into his collarbone.

It’s all Haechan’s fault, really. Three years ago, Jungwoo made the mistake of walking inside Haechan’s bedroom without knocking, accidentally finding you two making out in a very touchy way on his bed because a certain someone didn’t think to lock the door. Not only did you ruin his quote-unquote innocence, but his perception of you forever, and ever since that ordeal, Jungwoo has never opened his stepbrother’s door without knocking. This time, it just so happened to be wide-open.

You bite your lip, feeling bad. Kim Dohwan is Haechan’s other brother of whom he babysits whenever available (and you like to tag along, because dealing with children is stressful and Haechan’s already stressed enough with school and practice slash jock duties), and on weekdays Jungwoo has to wake up from his nap earlier to pick up the kid from school and bring him back home, then leave for work. You were too loud and disrupted the poor guy’s nap time.

“Oh,” Haechan says the syllable blankly, not too sympathetic, “did we wake you?”

“Of course not, I usually wake up at 2pm and take extra long showers to start my day,” Jungwoo deadpans, “but whatever. I’m heading out. Don’t forget to go grocery shopping today.”

“Noted,” you and Haechan say simultaneously, gazing at one another and stifling giggles when you catch each other’s gaze. Jungwoo smiles at you, then flicks off his brother before parting.

When you’re both all alone again, a few seconds pass before Haechan’s eyes do that thing where they twinkle every time something catches his interest (or perhaps that’s the in love side of your brain making you see things.)

“Hey, you coming to Chenle’s Valentines Day party Monday?” You don’t know why he’s even asking, you follow Haechan everywhere he goes like a lost puppy. Maybe he’s discreetly asking you out. “Unless you’re actually busy, by the way, I hope you know you’re going. And maybe you’ll find some single pringle interested in a relationship. You can’t just kiss me forever, you know.” Oh. Well that eliminates that thought.

A part of you is yelling at you to decline, to lie and say that you actually have a dick or pussy appointment scheduled for the 14th, yet another is weak, in spite of you being aware of how this works. First of all, Valentine’s Day parties are mainly for single people who don’t have anything better to do, and each time one of you goes to one, you end up meeting some stranger and hooking up with them. You know that’s more than likely what he’s going to do, and you aren’t strong enough to watch him flirt with other people.

You know how to put up a good front, though, so you’ll fake it until you make it.

“We can do a lot more than kiss,” you suggest with a wink.

Haechan grimaces, “No thanks. Now get off my lap.”

You frown, but climb off his lap nonetheless. “Wow,” you drag dramatically, “You’ll make out with me for what feels like hours, but sticking your dick in me is where you draw the line?”

“Precisely.”

You gasp in faux offense. “Oh, come on. Sex doesn’t seem so bad. Like, think of it as my pussy giving your dick a nice warm hug.”

Haechan’s at a loss for words, his face bright red. How do you even come up with this stuff? You’re like the personification of that’s what she said, “Oh my god, are you coming or not?”

You joke, “I thought you said sticking your dick in me was where you draw the line?”

He shoots you a glare so sharp you’re sure that if you were still on his lap, he’d be barely resisting the urge to shove you off. You don’t miss the way his cheeks heat up, though.

Haechan groans exasperatedly, leaning back his gaming chair, “Y/n, seriously!”

“Fine!” resisting your best friend is literally impossible, you conclude, because you have officially caved in to his request—or, more or less, demand, rather, “fine, fine! I’ll go!”

“Great,” he grins with satisfaction, beaming with his thirty-two teeth, and you even see little gleams of smiles in his eyes, “anyway, Dohwan’s gonna be here soon, so let’s get ready to go shopping.”

You furrow your brows. You have a solid twenty minutes left, and all you really need to do is slip on your shoes.

“I need more Tootsie Pops,” Haechan adds, and suddenly everything makes a lot more sense.

And you roll your eyes. “We’ll get you some more Tootsie Pops, but you better not ditch us for the candy aisle!”

“Of course, not,” he smiles, not even trying to sound or appear convincing. “I’d never leave you guys.”

That’s exactly what he does.

You aren’t even remotely surprised, though heavily disappointed when he announces in the middle of the thankfully empty cereal aisle that he’s going to find Tootsie Pops, managing to run off before you can even protest.

Gripping the shopping cart, you avert your gaze from the Cinnamon Toast Crunch boxes to his figure, almost missing him jog onto the following aisle. You shake your head, a small smile tugging your lips. If it were the end of the world, Haechan would stock up on those candies before he would even think to consider water.

“Auntie Y/N,” you aren’t quite adjusted to being addressed as an aunt, but you aren’t against it either. You have the image all put together—rich, thriving, and the kids adore you, “do you love my brother?”

That was perhaps the very last question you expected the six-year-old boy to ask you. Your eyes are a little wide, but it’s a kid, you remind yourself, so you shouldn’t be worried. But shit, then again, if a first-grader can figure it out, you’re fresh out of luck.

“Why do you think that?” You crouch down to be eye-level with him, having a feeling there’s some misunderstanding here. Dohwan’s bright for his age and doesn’t let anyone forget it, but you’ll be damned if he’s sniffed you out.

He makes a face. “I saw you kiss him, just like mommy and daddy do. And my mommy and daddy love each other very—” he stretches the vowel, and you can’t help but giggle, “—much! That’s why they made me!” then he gasps, and you fear what it means, praying he doesn’t ask what you think he will. “Will you and my brother have a baby, too? I wan’ a new friend!”

On second thought, you think you’d rather he would’ve asked you what you thought he was. You nearly have a heart attack in the middle of the aisle, yet still, Dohwan gazes up at you with his innocent, sparkly eyes. You assume it’s in the blood; Jungwoo doesn’t have them, and he isn’t blood-related to Haechan, but Dohwan partially is, and the twinkle is prominent.

Calmly, you reply, “Don’t you already have a lot of friends?”

He does, you both know it. You vaguely remember pulling up to his sixth birthday bash and being in shock of all the little kids jumping and flipping on the Spider-Man bouncy house. You haven’t been surrounded by that many children since, hell, probably since kindergarten.

“Yeah, but I wanna be a big brother,” he folds his tiny arms and pouts, “It’s not fair Hyuckie and Woo get to be big, but I don’t!”

With minimum success, you manage to stifle your laugh, stretching out your arms to bring the little boy in for a hug, “You’ll be big one day. Trust me, you don’t wanna rush it.”

“And strong like Superman?”

“And strong like Superman,” you reassure, all smiley and convincing. “Now let’s go check up on your big brother, he’s taking too long.”

Dohwan rocks from side to side as he walks, murmuring some Nickelodeon TV show theme song, and you push the cart until you’ve reached your designation.

Quickly, you regret acting on your impatience. The scene taking place at the back of the aisle is anything but comforting—Haechan’s talking to some girl, whom of which is literally throwing herself onto him, and you can’t help but notice the way he wallows in the attention. For fucks sake, all the attention you give him and he doesn’t even give a fraction of it back! Then here comes this random girl from your campus.

Sometimes, you think about how you could do everything she’s doing right now—twirl your hair around your finger, be touchy with him, giggling girlishly at everything he says, funny or not—and yet he wouldn’t bat an eye, because you’re best friends and nothing more. Kissing each other breathless is already normalized between the two of you, what’s a little flirting.

Sometimes, you wish you hadn’t kissed your best friend that day. You’re both too comfortable, everything is too weightless. I love you, Haechan says it back without a thought. C’mere, he calls and pulls you onto his lap or cuddles you to death. Fuck, he—on very rare occasions when making out goes a little too far—groans into your ear, groping you a little. Scratch that. It may be weightless on his end, but it isn’t on yours, and everything has an everlasting effect on you.

“Auntie?”

When you look down at Dohwan, your gaze is so, so tired. Your eyes do the talking; you can’t move your lips.

He hugs your leg. “I love you.”

His face is pure, innocent, but he reads you so perfectly. The corners of your lips turn up, and you ruffle his hair, “Love ya, too. Let’s go get your brother, alright?”

He bounces eagerly, and you both begin to stroll down the aisle until you’re beside Haechan. You’re in a selfish mood today, so you think of some remark to make in the process.

“Nice Tootsie Pops, Bowlcut,” you mask your tiny emotional breakdown with a joke, “Hi, Faith.”

“Hope,” she corrects, evidently annoyed by your presence, though she doesn’t state it outright. “My name is Hope. And… bowl cut?”

“Interchangeable,” you dismiss her correction carelessly. In all honesty, you already knew her name, but you’re feeling like a bitter bitch currently, “and yeah, in high school Haechan had this hideous bowl cut that he—”

“Shut the fuck up,” Haechan grumbles, “that was four years ago!”

“And I’ll never forget,” you’re smiling blissfully, nostalgic. “Anyways, what’cha two doing?”

“We were catching up, it’s been a minute since I’ve seen Hope here,” you hear Hope snicker at this, and something about it is extremely off-putting. He turns to her, “So, I’m in a bit of a time crunch. Could I have your number?”

Ouch. Right in your face, literally.

She giggles some more, typing her number in his phone, and you try to focus on Dohwan so that you don’t cave into your desire to knock her upside the head. There’s already so much on your plate, you don’t need an assault charge.

She smiles, all bubbly and giddy. You know jealousy isn’t a good look, but it’s still pissing you off. “See you around?”

“See you around,” Haechan replies. She hugs him, not forgetting to shoot you a look from across his shoulder as she does, and only once satisfied does she turns on her heel, sashaying away.

“Didn’t know pussy was on the shopping list,” you sneer, relieved once she’s finally gone. Her presence was suffocating.

“Yeah, yeah, whatever,” he rolls his eyes, “at least I’m actually trying, I don’t know what you’re going to do when I’m cuffed down and—holy sh—I mean crap! You’re so quiet, I forgot you were here,” Haechan jumps, only noticing Dohwan when he pokes at his leg. “And don’t you dare make a cuff joke, y/n. Not in front of the kid.”

You yell in that defensive tone which is a tell-tale sign you’re lying, “I wasn’t gonna!”

Haechan gives you the look.

The we’re-best-friends, I-know-when-you’re-lying look.

And that look is utterly withering, so you decide you’re accepting defeat. “Okay fine, maybe I was thinking about it, but I wasn’t actually gonna say it. Not with him around.”

Haechan snorts, like you said something funny, but in reality he just doesn’t believe you. “Yeah, alright. Let’s finish shopping.”

You don’t argue, but there’s a lingering thought in your mind as you push the cart, rattling around in your brain still.

When he’s cuffed. Hmm. You can’t speak for him completely, but you both know how that one goes. When you get into a relationship, you think the person is great and they serve as a nice temporary distraction—that is, until you’re bored and realize no one will ever compare to Haechan, and especially not in the kissing department. So you break up, and then you go back to making out with Haechan, solidifying your suspicion that no one will ever replace your best friend. It’s the reason you don’t do relationships anymore, you feel bad for using people when you know it isn’t going to change a thing. It never does.

As far as your knowledge extends, things aren’t too different with Haechan. You and him don’t push things, you don’t pry too deep. There’s some unspoken boundary, and you know when to drop things. That’s why you both say the same thing each time you ask one another why you and whoever it was that you were previously seeing broke up—it wasn’t working out.

Like a moth to a flame, Haechan always finds his way back to you too, because apparently you’re the only person that can keep him tied down. You don’t think that’s the case, though. Your problem is you’re in love with your best friend, no matter how hard you try to suppress the feelings. His problem? You can’t be sure, but you’d guess commitment issues.

Whatever it is, and as selfish as it may sound, you want it to stay. He isn’t yours, but you like the comfort of knowing that he isn’t anyone else’s, either.

If Cupid had a human counterpart, it would be Na Jaemin in reincarnated form. He may not have wings nor a bow and arrow, but he does have dedication and a gigantic mouth.

“I can’t believe you called me over here for this,” you stand in an effort to leave, but Jaemin pulls you back down by your wrist, so you sigh, accepting that you’re stuck in the cafe and in the middle of a Jaem-terrogation.

“Not so fast, Sonic. You still haven’t answered my question. I don’t have all day, you know, I have other people’s business to be in,” he admits unabashedly, and you snort at his honesty.

Jaemin is an extremely shameless, extremely straightforward individual. He knows what he wants, how to get it, and the only time he’s afraid of letting someone know what he’s chasing for is when it interferes with his goal of obtaining said desire. He loves all things drama and gossip, and these are the lengths he’ll go to squeeze information out of you. No wonder he’s one of the writers for the campus newspaper.

“I don’t have feelings for Haechan,” you fiddle with your fork. “And even if I did, why would it matter? Haechan doesn’t have feelings for me, either.”

“Forgive me, but you’re a fucking dumbass,” Jaemin concludes, and you gasp in dramatic offense. “Why would I be here if he didn’t like you back, y/n? You know that he hasn’t had anyone over in two weeks? There’s like, three things at the top of Haechan’s list of shit he needs to survive, and that’s you, Tootsie Pops, and sex. Yet he’s gone two entire weeks without it. He likes you, really fucking bad.”

“Golly gee, Haechan hasn’t fucked anyone in two entire weeks. He must be head over heels in love with me,” you deadpan, ignoring how Jaemin rolls his eyes in response. “Be serious, Jaem. He literally got this girl’s number the other day. The man said himself that he doesn’t want to stick his dick in me. There’s nothing going on.”

Okay, so maybe Haechan is a raging sexaholic. Maybe he’s been a little horny recently. And maybe contact-full makeout sessions have been a reoccurrence in the past two weeks, but none of that matters, and he typically has extreme self control. Fresh as yesterday, he was definitely trying to get into Hope’s pants. It’s weightless, everything between you. It means absolutely nothing, and you’re trying to come to terms with the possibility that it never will. You wish your friends would accept the fact, too.

At least they don’t know you and Haechan make out, and have been for the past four years. They’d be insufferable, and you two would absolutely never hear the end of it.

“Y/n, please. Your biggest competition is those damn Tootsie Pops.”

“And if you told him that he had to live without me or the candy, he’d choose them over me any day.”

“Actually, he’d tell me to fuck off—and stop asking him stupid questions. You can’t tell me I’m wrong because I’m speaking from experience,” Jaemin grins, “I pushed the question until he gave me a proper answer. He chose you, by the way.”

You groan into your hands, “Unless you have some other evidence to provide besides this stupid question and him not getting laid in two weeks, you’re wasting my time here, Cupid.”

Jaemin sighs, “I thought I could pressure you into admitting your feelings—”

“I don’t have feelings for Haechan!”

“—that you deny having, but I guess taking the high road doesn’t work. Don’t worry, I still have plan B. I mean, you should be worried, but it’s whatever.”

You blink. “Plan B?”

He ignores you, standing up and preparing to take his leave. You’re still curious about whatever his alternative, backup plan is however, and he doesn’t look like he’s going to tell you.

“Jaemin!” You shriek. “What are you talking about?”

“February 14th, Chenle’s party,” he answers vaguely, swinging his bag over his shoulders. “Be there, or be square. Whatever that means.”

He exits without another word, leaving you dumbfounded and with a sudden dread in your chest. They don’t… know, do they? No, of course not. How could they? You’ve been keeping this secret for nearly four years, and the only people that know are Jungwoo and Dohwan.

Great. Another reason to dread the fourteenth, and despise Cupid—and his human counterpart, your actual mortal enemy.

“I know you like Regina George, but the dress code is Cady Heron.”

Bummer. You didn’t exactly plan on attending as a sexy bunny in fishnets and knee-high boots, but you don’t intend on wearing a Party City outfit, neither. It’s only the 6th though, so you still have a week and some change to outfit plan.

You frown, “Why the change? None of his past parties have had much of a dress code.”

“Because Chenle is also stuck babysitting his baby brother on Valentine’s day while his parents are having a date night,” Haechan answers. “I’m not saying you have to dress like a prude, but don’t dress like a slut, either.”

Ignoring the insinuation behind his words, you don’t miss the fact he said also. “What do you mean also? Don’t tell me…”

“Exactly what you think. Dad is whisking my stepmom away on a romantic evening date to only God knows where, and Jungwoo is busy with his girlfriend, so me being the sole single-pringle in the family gave him the bright idea to have me baby sit,” he explains, though he doesn’t seem burdened by the task. “I don’t really mind, though. It’d be one thing if I planned on getting some pussy that night, but no one’s smashing at a party where there’s children. I hope not, at least.”

You wince at that. You hope not, too. It’s a setback that you have to re-plan your outfit, but on the plus side, Haechan can and will help you decide this time, even if you have to force him.

So that’s where you find yourself a couple hours later, your bedroom a mess as the aftermath of the meticulous care you’ve put into your self-styling. You’ve narrowed it down to two outfit selections; option A, the white crop-top with the cute pink pants; or option B, the pretty and red mini-dress with stilettos. It’s a little embarrassing that hours of your indecisiveness have led you to this conclusion, but you want to choose the perfect outfit that’s also not overbearing.

“And I have to help you why?”

“Because you’re my best friend, and that’s what best friends are for, duh.”

Haechan’s favorite thing about your place is you have all his utmost favorite games—and that literally everything there is like a piece of you, from the decoration to the smell of your perfume bottles you keep in your bathroom. He’d never tell you that, though—so he wasn’t too enthusiastic about being interrupted from his video-gaming session. But then, he realized he gets a special preview of your Valentine’s day outfit, and Haechan loves the way you dress, probably an abnormal amount. Slutty or prude-y.

“Then what’cha waiting for? Strip for me, princess,” he demands jokingly. It isn’t normal for you to feel bashful by anything a guy says, but everything is so different with Haechan. It’s the littlest, simplist things that drive you over the edge, that make you want him in ways you probably, scratch that, definitely shouldn’t.

And all the questions, assumptions, and rumors regarding your nonexistent relationship with Haechan aren’t exactly unwarranted. You two flirt and touch an abnormal amount, and while it’s common knowledge that Haechan is a touchy person, and you’re a natural flirt, people say it’s extreme between you two.

That makes you laugh. When it comes to the tension between you both that people speak of, you wish you could see what they see.

“You want to watch me strip?” You’re genuinely surprised, only the other day he seemed repulsed by the thought of you naked. “That’s new. I’m guessing you haven’t gotten laid in a hot minute.”

Haechan rolls his eyes, silently confirming what Jaemin told you at the cafe, but you shake the thought away, refusing to let it spur you on. It doesn’t mean anything. “Anyways. You’ve got nothing I haven’t seen before, baby girl. Now, you gonna strip or what?”

“I’m stripping, I’m stripping! Relax, Liam Payne!” It’s really nothing he hasn’t seen before, because Haechan’s seen naked girls, and he’s seen you half-naked before, so neither of you actually care. You peel off your top, slowly and in a strip tease sort of way and look him in the eye, giggling once you catch him shaking his head. You don’t repeat the movement with your shorts though, simply taking them off and picking up your new shirt to slip it off the hanger.

Successfully discreet, Haechan wallows in the sight of you half-naked for as long as he can before you’re slipping on the crop top and the pink pants. Now that he thinks about it, he bought you those pants, and darn do they make your ass look good. Then he realizes he’s thinking about your ass and taking not as discreet looks at it, and shakes the thought away.

“So?” Your voice cuts through the silence. “What do you think?”

He needs a moment to gather himself and recollect his thoughts, because he feels like turning on Destiny’s Child’s Bootylicious and if spoke his mind he would definitely say something he’d regret. Like, I could fuck the shit out of you. He doesn’t think he should say that.

“What do you mean, what do I think? I bought you those pants, I’d be damned if I thought you didn’t look good in them,” Haechan supplies, making you roll your eyes in response.

“Very underwhelming reaction. I wanted you to fall out on the floor and pass out for a few seconds with your hand on your chest,” you pout.

“Definitely not doing all that,” he chuckles. “But you do look good enough to garner that type of reaction. Anyways, it’s stripping time again. Get in that dress for me, princess.”

If he doesn’t stop with the pet names you’re going to combust. You hide it though, taking off outfit option A and putting on option B. You feel confident in your appearance, with or without him, but the way Haechan’s practically gawking at you does boost said confidence.

“What about this one?”

Okay, so Haechan’s one-hundred percent biased in his decision—or maybe he isn’t, since he didn’t buy this outfit—though nonetheless, he loves this dress on you. In his personal opinion, you’ll look good in anything you wear, but the way this particular dress hugs your figure perfectly is a bonus. He knows all eyes are going to be on you the moment you step inside Chenle’s house, and maybe he’s going to have to keep you and Dohwan close to his side.

Rather than replying verbally, Haechan walks forward and pulls you into a kiss. His hands dip around your waist, skirting the area until he’s gripping you like he’s afraid of letting go.

And as always, you melt into his lips. Like ice to the sun, or wax to a flame. It’s the umpteenth kiss in your whole lifetime, but Haechan always makes it feel like the first time. Like two love-struck highschoolers, except with a lot more experience. Haechan kisses you like he loves you, and you hate it. You might even loathe it.

His fingers slip down your hips, to your revealed thighs, like he just so happens to know that’s one of your weak spots. Luckily you’ve learned some of his weak spots too, and not really thinking, you don’t hesitate to aim for his most sensitive one - his neck. You can’t get used to how beautiful he sounds as he moans, your lips pressing into his sweet spot and leaving undoubtedly a mark.

“Fuck,” Haechan moans, “you’re my kryptonite, you know that?”

“A kiss is all it takes for you to fold?” You gasp out with a smirk.

“Shut up.”

Your grin widens. “Make me.”

Just as he leans in, about to pin you down to your duvet and kiss the life out of you while you’re thinking that maybe this is the tension people speak of, his phone rings in his back pocket. It feels like snapping out some trance or spell, like a reverse Cupid’s arrow, and he instantly backs off of you.

He takes a look at his phone screen. “I um, I gotta take this.”

Biting your lip, you nod. “Okay.”

“You look great though,” he comments, and you smile thinly at him as he slips from between your fingertips yet again.

It seems that you’re left all alone, pathetically wet, and wondering if that person on the other line is Hope - but you try to shake that thought off.

Sighing, you flop against your sheets. Love is some extremely cruel, extremely rigged game that only lucky people win, and it seems that Luck has sided with the evil that is Cupid. You’ve been dealt cards, and Haechan refuses to show you his hand. All you can do is watch it play out.

Haechan knew that something was dangerously off when Jaemin bought him a brand-new bag of Tootsie Pops without being asked, and invited you over for a movie night with the guys, offering to open up with you and Haechan’s all-time favorite movie, Mean Girls. He even offered to play The Kissing Booth next! Everyone else instantly protested of course, but the fact he offered in the first place is borderline suspicious.

Sure, Jaemin’s not the devil or anything, depending on who you ask. He’s… kind, and he can be a sweetheart. But Jaemin does nothing for free, and Haechan can’t shake the thought that this is planned bribery. And it isn’t hush-money. Jaemin doesn’t buy silence, he buys words.

By the time Jaemin asks Haechan to help him with the popcorn, he’s ninety-nine point nine percent sure that something is definitely wrong here. Yet still, he follows him into the kitchen.

“Alright, what’s up man?” Haechan wastes zero time, wanting to get to the bottom of all this. “I know you want something out of me. There’s no other reason you would offer to play The Kissing Booth, or buy me Tootsie Pops for free.”

Jaemin scoffs, but he doesn’t try to front, “Glad you know. Since we’re on the same page, let’s address this thing with you and y/n.”

“That’s what this is about?” Haechan grumbles. “I’ve told you, I don’t have feelings for her!” He whisper-yells.

Jaemin has heard that far too many times for it to be convincing. He’s positive that even Helen Keller herself could tell you two are hopelessly in love. Takes one to know one, he thinks. It seems the three of you must be blind, because you and Haechan are oblivious to your feelings for one another, and it’s painfully obvious.

“And Mary wasn’t a virgin,” Jaemin says ironically, making Haechan roll his eyes. “If you’re not in love with her, then explain what the hell is going on between you two. I know that she’s your best friend or whatever, but you don’t act like it at all. From a fresh perspective, someone would totally think you’re in love.”

Haechan hates that he’s right. It doesn’t make sense the amount of times you’ve gone to public places and had cashiers refer to you as a couple, or elderly people ask you if you’re together. Because you’re not. You’re best friends, and even if Haechan wants to be more than that, that’s his label. And he’s sure he’s stuck with it for life.

“You’re fucking Hope to distract yourself from your feelings for y/n,” Jaemin adds, and it’s a statement, not a question.

“I’m not—”

“You are,” Jaemin interjects. “Head over heels, in love with a girl you think doesn’t reciprocate your feelings, and you’re also being an ass to her, whether you know it or not.”

If Haechan was in a situation where he needed to simplify the reason you two click so well, he’d say chalk it up to compatibility and say it’s because you’re like a mirror of one another. Which also means he knows you, better than anyone else even, and he knows neither of you do the whole catching feelings things anymore. You like to fuck and flirt, and fuck some more, to avoid the fact that you love too hard. If you fuck people whose names you don’t even remember, it doesn’t mean a darn thing that you two make out.

No one really knows about that part yet. But they do know that you like to fuck, and that’s why Haechan thinks that if he’s an ass, then that means so are you. What the fuck is he doing that you aren’t?

Even if he is an ass, what is he supposed to do? He’s only recently realized that damn, he actually does have feelings for you, which is where Hope comes along and yes, he is fucking her to distract himself from you. So what? It’s not like it’s working, he’s still stuck on you, obsessed with the thought of you, craving your touch and the sound of your voice. He still loves you, and it’s so scary because no matter what his friends say, he thinks they don’t know you or your relationship like he does. They think they do, but they don’t.

“I’m not in love,” Haechan lies through his teeth, “maybe I’m in like.”

Jaemin snorts. In like? That’s the stupidest thing he’s ever heard. Not in love his fucking ass. “You’re in denial, that’s what you are.”

Haechan grumbles, trying desperately not to raise his voice so that the others don’t hear him from the living room, “Even if I did like her—and I’m telling you, I don’t—it wouldn’t change anything because she doesn’t like me.”

“You two are the same breed of oblivious and stupid,” Jaemin takes the popcorn out of the microwave, pouring it all into a bowl. He’s even laughing, much to Haechan’s confusion, but he’s apparently unbothered by Haechan’s lack of confession, “but fine. Lie to my face. I still have a backup plan.”

“A back-up plan?” Haechan repeats, lost.

“I just thought it would be nice of me to try and get you to confess before I have to work a Valentine’s day miracle, but unfortunately you two are a match made in heaven—both terribly stubborn,” Jaemin says vaguely, not really answering Haechan’s question, “so I guess we’ll all know the truth at Chenle’s party.”

Jaemin exits with the popcorn bowls before Haechan can even part his lips to ask another question, and he stands there, shocked and unsure of how to react. He’s concerned, though. Jaemin has something cooking (besides the popcorn), and he isn’t sure what, but it’s Na fucking gossiping blabbermouth Jaemin. That means it can’t be anything good.

So apparently when you and Haechan had that heated makeout session the other day, you left a trail - or in other words, you marked his neck the fuck up.

You hadn’t noticed because he covered it up with concealer, but you’re in the middle of another one of those when he stops you, preventing you from repeating your mistake.

“You can’t do that. People will see,” Haechan frowns. You wonder what’s the problem with hickeys. Is he embarrassed? No way. Haechan? Embarrassed? About hickeys? He has much bigger fish to fry.

In contrast, you’re over the moon. Even if he isn’t yours, marking him up makes you feel like he belongs to you. Plus, other people will see, and they’ll know that he isn’t theirs, either. Haechan also has a beautiful neck, you realize as you stare at his skin. It makes you wonder if there’s anything about him that isn’t beautiful.

“Would that be so bad?” You ask. “You’d look sexy all marked up by me.”

Haechan groans, “Do you ever think with your head and not your pussy?”

“I wish my pussy was my head. My head’s just so full of you,” you sigh dramatically.

It’s rare for Haechan to blush, but you somehow manage to make him full-on flush sometimes and you take that as an achievement. It’s partially the reason you love flirting with him so much, he’s so reactive. His reactions are cute sometimes.

“Be serious for 5 seconds,” he whines, and you giggle.

“I was serious,” you insist, “but fine, I’ll think with my head since yours is clearly not working. No one’s gonna assume they’re from me, Hyuck. Just tell them they’re from one of your hoes.”

“I know, but it’s not them I’m worried about. It’s, um…” he trails off.

You’re confused, blinking. If not your friends, then who on earth—oh, for fucks sake.

“It’s Hope,” you utter tonelessly.

“Yeah, uh, yeah,” he wonders why you suddenly sound so dry, and then the whole grocery shopping thing seeps back into his mind. You obviously don’t like Hope, and it’s not just you, really. Lots of people don’t like her. But Haechan needs a pretty face to compete with the image of yours in his head, even if it isn’t winning. “She kinda likes me, and—”

“Do you like her?” You don’t mean to ask so fast. It slips, like your mouth has a mind of its own.

Haechan shrugs. No, he doesn’t like her. He likes you, but he thinks that maybe he can somehow convince himself it’s the other way around. So he replies, “Maybe.”

Fuck. You try not to appear suddenly devoid of life, forcing a cheery smile. “That’s… nice,” you lie through your teeth. “Let me take this opportunity to have one last kiss before I possibly never will again?”

Haechan snickers, to silently say as if. He isn’t wrong for it, either. One kiss is never one kiss with him — never has been, never will be. There’s a reason you both bonded over bombing a math exam.

D-day rolls around, and you’re eyeing your frame in your full-length mirror, smoothing your palms over your dress as you give yourself a quick once-over before the clock strikes 7PM. You look like that bitch, and everyone in that party is going to fucking know it because you’re going to walk in there like that bitch. Fuck Cupid. You don’t need his stupid bow. And fuck Haechan, too. He’s your ride, but he’s gonna ditch you at some point in the party like he always does. It’ll be no different now, and this time, you’ll be the first one to leave.

The chime of the doorbell jolts you from your mental slumber, and you quickly reach for your purse then head towards the door with a heavy heartbeat. You know he’s already seen you in this dress, he chose it for fucks sake, but there’s something else that gets your heart racing—no. You can’t think about him. Fuck Haechan, remember? He’s no good for you.

“Here goes nothing,” you mutter to yourself, palm on the doorknob, “you can do this.”

Haechan’s sucks in a breath the moment you open the door. You look gorgeous. You always do, but in this particular moment, you look better than you ever have before. Those corny romance sayings usually make him laugh with mirth, but he’s genuinely convinced you look better everyday that he sees you. All dressed up like this, or not.

“You look so pretty, Auntie!” Dohwan beats him to a compliment.

You bend down to ruffle the boy’s hair, “Thank you, Dohwan. You look very handsome.” And then you look at Haechan.

He looks handsome as well, unfortunately. Jet black hair, exposed forehead, and his outfit is black with red hearts in the center of the shirt. You try not to pay him too much mind, but your heart and the place between your thighs don’t seem to agree with your mind. He catches you looking at him, and feels a twinge of anxiousness in his heart. Get it together, man, he tells himself. Lee Donghyuck doesn’t get nervous looking at pretty girls. Lee Donghyuck doesn’t hesitate about his actions, either, wondering if he should hold your hand, he doesn’t rethink what he should say. It all comes to him naturally.

“Yeah, you look beautiful,” he settles, mentally cursing himself for being unable to think of anything else. He blames you. Ever since you first snuck in his mind, you’ve been living rent-free there, and make it hard to think about anything else sometimes. That’s why he thought that needed distractions.

If you could relay the message to your heart, you’d tell it stop beating. Instead, you mask your emotion, smiling. “Thank you, likewise. Now c’mon, we gotta get there by 7:30!”

Haechan’s saddened by the dismissal, but you don’t catch his face as you walk to his car.

If you ignore him, you can do this.

Haechan cannot do this.

Something isn’t right. It wasn’t right the second he noticed you gave him a simple, rushed compliment, not bothering to make some sexual remark that usually makes Haechan’s cheeks feel like fire. You didn’t even kiss him before you got in the car. And Haechan’s sure you’ve been avoiding him like the plague, scurrying off and getting lost in the red and pink sea before he could even ask you if you wanted to check out the drink menu.

He doesn’t know where you are, and that haunts him. Turns out Chenle is paying Yangyang, Ten and Jisung to keep the kids entertained on one end of the house, whilst the adults do adult-y things on the other. You could be with someone else for all he knows, hell, you probably are. He was practically fuming when he saw some people staring at you as you walked in.

“Uh oh, I think y/n divorced Haechan,” Chenle jokes, and a choir of laughs follows suit.

Haechan grumbles, “A guy can’t miss his girl best friend?”

“Of course, you can,” Chenle drawls, “but everyone knows she’s more than just a friend to you. Like even if you aren’t together, there’s no way you guys don’t have feelings for each other.”

“Right? And they’re so cute together, too. A literal match made in heaven by angel Cupid,” Jaemin agrees, speaking as though Haechan isn’t right there.

“You’re dating y/n?” gasps Karina, overhearing Jaemin much to Haechan’s dismay. Oh, great, she’s as much as a blabbermouth as he is. The whole world’s going to think Haechan’s dating you in five minutes or less.

“No!”

“Yes, he is, spread the word,” Jaemin says, already knowing he doesn’t have to tell her. Karina’s mumbling I knew it under her breath before jogging somewhere.

“You know,” Haechan starts, downing a shot because if he’s not at least tipsy he’s going to die at this party, “she’s been making me watch murder documentaries with her and I’ve definitely picked up a thing or two. I’d be careful.”

Jaemin scoffs, “Please. You’re going to be kissing my ass and the ground that I walk on by the time this party’s over.”

There it goes. Haechan wonders what’s so special about tonight that Jaemin’s been hinting at vaguely. It’s been keeping him on his toes, but he doesn’t ask because he knows Jaemin, and he isn’t going to tell him a thing. The one time this guy wants to keep something secret.

An hour flies by, and Haechan still hasn’t seen you. He’s looked for you, and refuses to believe his eyes are somehow missing you, even though you’re in a crowd. He literally went up the stars and gazed over the railing for a better view, and you were no where to be found. You’ve refused to answer your phone, too, and Haechan doesn’t know what to do. He would just start talking to some random chick, but that’s not what Haechan wants. He doesn’t want some random chick. He wants to be with you. Hold you. Touch you. Kiss you, with no shame, no fear, in front of everyone, and he isn’t in denial about it. He wants you.

And Jaemin is fed up.

“Alright, I’m tired of you moping around drinking like a divorced man. Let’s go to the kitchen,” Jaemin suggests. Or commands, but still.

Haechan quirks a brow. “Where there’s nothing but more drinks?”

“Trust me, I’m not letting you drink anymore tonight. You have a wife and a kid to drive home,” Jaemin jokes. Usually he’d deny any sort of relationship with you that isn’t best-friendship, but Haechan simply shakes his head, following his friend and roommate into the kitchen.

Then he sees you, and his jaw doesn’t just drop, but it falls flat on the ground, bounces a little, and comes back down. You’re clinging to Chenle’s side with a confused face, equally as surprised to see him, though not very delighted.

“What’s going on?”

“What’s going on?”

You stare at one another.

“Stop copying me!”

“Stop copying me!”

Jaemin and Chenle stare at one another, then stare at you two staring at one another, and stare at one another again.

“I hate to interrupt your… stare-off, but there’s a reason we brought you two here,” Jaemin interjects, making you two finally split gazes as you stare at him, confused.

“Which is?”

“Which is?”

You glare at him. Jaemin’s success was short-lived, it seems.

“Drum roll, please,” he says, and Chenle begins tapping against the counter, “Dohwan!”

Suddenly, Dohwan pops up from around the corner. He’s on the completely wrong side of the house, and while he’s under adult supervision, you still wonder why he’s here.

You blink. “What’s he doing here?”

Jaemin smirks. “I’m glad you asked. Dohwan tells me he’s witnessing some very interesting sights of the two of you. Go ahead and tell us what you saw, kiddo.”

“I saw Haechan and Auntie y/n kissing, like mommy and daddy do!” Dohwan shares, grimacing in disgust. If you weren’t practically fearing for your life right now, you’d probably laugh at his reaction.

“And how often do you see this?” Chenle adds.

“Um…” the kid ponders, “every time Auntie y/n comes over. I heard them say they wanted to keep it a secret from me, but they’re not very good at it.”

Haechan shoots you a panicked look, and you’re wearing the exact same one. By the time you realize that this is what Jaemin’s been hinting at this whole time, it’s much too late. Your secret has been exposed to the worst people ever, and now they’re definitely going to think you’re dating. 

“Thank you for your input, Dohwan,” Jaemin smiles, then turns to look at you and Haechan. You’re both frozen and stiff, unsure of how to respond. “So, anything to say about this?”

“It doesn’t mean anything,” Haechan’s quick to say. You hope no one catches the way your face falters with hurt for a split second. “If you want me to be honest, then fine, I will. Yeah, we kiss. We’ve been kissing since high school, but it didn’t mean anything then and it doesn’t mean anything now. We just, I don’t know, do it for fun.”

Chenle deadpans, “So you just kiss for pure, innocent fun.”

“Exactly,” Haechan nods. “It means nothing.”

It means something to me, you think to yourself, and when you notice the silence in the room, you gaze up to see everyone’s eyes on you, Haechan’s a little wide. Oh, fuck.

“I said that aloud, didn’t I?”

“Yep,” Jaemin grins. He was right. “Is there something you want to share with the class?”

Stupidly, you decide to look at Haechan, and he’s re-lost his composure, frozen up and stiff all over again. Your heart is pounding harder than it has been all night. It’s partially the alcohol, but you can feel it in your veins and all around you. It won’t leave you alone, and looking at Haechan, it’s faster, as if to say he’s the one I want.

So you choose to make another decision that you might possibly regret, but you have to get this off your chest. It isn’t news to anyone but Haechan anyways.

“Donghyuck,” you start, and he knows it’s getting serious because you just said his government name. You literally never call him by his government name. “I know we agreed to keep things platonic, and for it to mean nothing, but I want you. Like really, really bad. I think I—no, everyone’s right, I really am, extremely in love with you. If you don’t feel the same I understand, I just had to get this off my che—”

You aren’t given the chance to finish before Haechan swoops you in his arms, reaching for your waist as he pulls you into a kiss. There’s a chorus of cheers from Chenle and Jaemin, followed by a shriek of disgust from Dohwan as he covers his eyes, but you two aren’t trying to hide anymore, you want to scream from the rooftops that you’re in love. Yes, the infamous Lee Donghyuck and y/n know more than flirting and fucking. You’re in love, drunk off of a sip of it and the taste of Haechan’s lips, and god, has kissing your best friend never felt better.

“Let’s give the newlywed couple some privacy now,” Jaemin says with a grin. Gosh, he really is the spawn of Cupid, but you have to thank him. This wouldn’t be happening if it wasn’t for his stupid ‘gotcha!’ plan. “You two work this out.”

The three of them pile out, and you and Haechan part from one another to breathe. You stay in comfortable silence for a moment, his hands slipping into yours.

“Your hands are sweating,” you comment after a while.

“It’s hot.”

“It’s the middle of February.”

“So? Global warming is real, you know,” Haechan shrugs, refusing to acknowledge the fact that his hand is sweating because he’s nervous. He’s accepted that you make him feel all warm inside and his heart feel like mush, but he still isn’t used to not hiding the way you make him feel.

You laugh but don’t press things. “Newlywed couple, huh. Can’t be, you still haven’t popped the question.”

“Yeah?” He laughs, too. “Then will you take my hand in marriage and take me as your illegally wedded husband?”

You hum, pretending to contemplate, “Hmm, I don’t know. You sure you don’t wanna marry a giant cardboard Tootsie Pop cutout? Or what about that girl? What happened to her, by the way, I thought you said you liked her.”

Haechan groans, not really wanting to think about her right now, “No more Hope. Ironically, she’s a lost cause. I had to cut shit with her because she can’t comprehend what a fling is. She wanted a relationship, and you know, I lied to you when I said that I might want her. I didn’t know you liked me back until, like, now, so I was just saying shit in hopes of convincing myself I could stop liking you. That plan failed, though.”

His words lift a massive weight off of your shoulders, and you finally feel like you can breathe now. Take that, bitch, you think with a smirk. She was giggling in your face so hard at the grocery store, but you’re having the last laugh.

You tilt your head. “What about the Tootsie Pops?”

“Yeah, sorry but I can’t give them up as easily. Would you mind a Tootsie Pop bouquet?”

Gosh, this is the man you love. You roll your eyes, but smile as you reply, “You know, you’re like a Tootsie Pop.”

If Haechan were a dog, his ears would perk up right now. “How come?”

“I’ll never know how long I’ll be able to kiss you without wanting to fuck you,” you lean in his ear to purr, voice tickling his neck. You eye it and his lips, and lord knows you can’t wait to finally be able to mark him up again.

“Yeah? Wanna go home, put Dohwan to sleep, and let me take this dress off you?” He grips at your waist, his hand resting there with the burning urge to dip lower. He bites his lip.

“Thought you drew the line at sticking your dick in me,” you joke.

“That was when I was in denial about wanting you,” Haechan whispers, “but now I can admit to myself that even though you amazing in this dress, I wanna take it off of you. Your body’s perfect.”

“I kinda hate the scar on my thigh.”

“Don’t. It provides depth to your character. It makes someone wonder how you got it, the story of how it happened,” he answers, ever so deeply.

“Poetic,” you snort, “can’t tell if you’re giving me Bruno Mars or John Legend vibes more right now.”

Haechan rolls his eyes, smiling. “You said you’d never know how long you’d be able to kiss me without dying to fuck me, right?”

“I never said dying.”

He ignores you, “Then let’s put it to the test, shall we?”

Your lips wind up pressed firmly to his, with your hands on his cheek and his palms on your hips yet again. It’s fiercer than ever, Haechan’s kissing you like he doesn’t want to let you breathe, like he wants to stay in this moment with you forever. He kisses you with love and lust, with passion and desire, with emotion and no more fear in his chocolate-y eyes. You don’t regret kissing Haechan that day. It took a while, but it brought you to this moment where you can finally call him yours. And that one more kiss stuff is bullshit. His lips are yours and vice versa, and as you’re by each other’s side, you’ll never stop kissing him. And he’ll never stop kissing you.

“They’re here!” Karina suddenly bursts into the kitchen, pointing at you and Haechan. “Look! I told you they were dating!”

Oh, god. You totally forgot about Karina’s stupid bet with Mark. Mark looks entirely devastated and surprised, devastated because that’s twenty-five bucks gone from his wallet, and surprised because he genuinely believed you and Haechan have been best friends this whole time. Technically, he isn’t wrong, but you’re not sure if you want to interrupt to tell them that.

Mark whines, “Oh, c’mon! I really thought you guys were just friends.”

“Pay up, loser,” Karina smirks, and with a pout, Mark pulls cash from his pockets.

Haechan looks at you, and while you don’t say anything, you can tell you’re both thinking the exact same thing. The whole campus is about to know you two are dating. Karina’s for sure going to tell everyone she knows, hell, probably even people she doesn’t know, and there’s a ninety-nine point nine percent chance of Jaemin raining your business on everyone in his latest report for the school newspaper.

You can’t say that you care, though. This is what you wanted, to unashamedly love Haechan, to be able to state it proudly in front of everyone, to let everyone know, to claim him as yours and yours only. So fuck Cupid. Fuck his bow, fuck his arrow, because this relationship is all a product of you and Haechan’s hard work and dedication.

Who needs Cupid’s bow when you have tasty lips and Tootsie-Pops?

bonus <3

“You’re telling me you’ve been in love with me for the past four years? Oh, you’re a soldier. I would have given up in the first month.”

You snort. Part of becoming Haechan’s girlfriend is the process of telling one another the secrets you’ve been keeping, such as how long you can been in love. Haechan’s been in love with you for a solid year, he thinks, maybe two, but it’s been almost four years for you, on the other hand.

“If only it were that easy,” you sigh. “Trust me, I tried getting over you by getting under other people—how Jessie Reyez of me—but that didn’t work out, obviously.”

“You are too much like me,” Haechan shakes his head. “What made you think we should date anyways?”

“You mean, four years ago, or now?”

Haechan shrugs. “Either. Give me three reasons.”

“Oh, brace yourself. I could do a presentation on this. One, we know each other’s McDonald’s orders. Two, like you said, we’re very alike. When have we ever argued over pizza toppings?” You reason. “Three, I can’t imagine kissing anybody else. I mean, we’ve basically been practicing on each other for the past four years. I’m the reason you can kiss so good, it would be insane for you to make out with other people. Four, I have a fat ass and sometimes I catch you staring at—”

“I said three reasons!” Haechan cries, face blooming red as a rose.

“I could go for a fifth,” you grin, “we’re both terrible at math.”

“Damn right we are,” he mutters. “But that’s what makes us… us, isn’t it? The only reason we’re dating right now is because we couldn’t resist kissing each other after one time.”

He’s right. It practically only took one kiss to fall in love with Haechan. He’s giving you major Dua Lipa vibes right now.

“I know you’re thinking about that Dua Lipa song right now.”

You smirk. “You know me very well.”

He tilts his head. “And what else are you thinking about?”

“That you look like all I need,” you say in tune, making Haechan laugh. “And I just want to feel your skin on mine.”

“Then we should do something about that, right?” Haechan smirks back.

You couldn't help but to let out a light chuckle before turning back around, focusing on the professor's heavily lazy voice, making sure to take notes to give your shy boyfriend extra help later. But your mind wandered, was he wearing that sweater today? The one you bought for him, telling him he looked unreal in it. Is that the one he wore? It didn't hurt to check. You glanced over your shoulder, straining your eyes only to be met with his soft ones again. His gentle smile made your heart race, but you were done for when you saw that black and brown wool sweater; sitting on his shoulders and complimenting his glowy skin as he flashed his braces at you.

You couldn't help but to let out a light chuckle before turning back around, focusing on the professor's heavily lazy voice, making sure to take notes to give your shy boyfriend extra help later. But your mind wandered, was he wearing that sweater today? The one you bought for him, telling him he looked unreal in it. Is that the one he wore? It didn't hurt to check. You glanced over your shoulder, straining your eyes only to be met with his soft ones again. His gentle smile made your heart race, but you were done for when you saw that black and brown wool sweater; sitting on his shoulders and complimenting his glowy skin as he flashed his braces at you.

You smiled back timidly before turning back around. It was stupid really, seeing how into Seungmin you were. It's not like he wouldn't be able to tell. You often gave him compliments, telling him how smart he was, how lucky you felt to him in your life. It wasn't a secret that you were big on words of affirmation, but Seungmin... not so much. He was more of a quality time kinda guy. Always asking if you were free, coming to your apartment or your study sessions at the library. But he wouldn't ever bother you, he'd sit there, doing his own work, or playing on his phone. It was your favorite when he brung his guitar from his music class. He'd never say no when you asked him play you a tune. That's how he showed you meant the world to him. But still, it never got through to you, how much you meant to him. After all, you were big on words.

"Alright, class done, dismissed, whatever." Your professor didn't even bother wiping the board before he left. Students soon found their friends, packing up together, making plans. You packed extra slowly, waiting for what happened after this class every time you had it. "You free later?" You smiled as you finally put away your laptop before turning around. Your heart melted as you looked into his eyes that held a plethora of emotions you couldn't decipher. "I'm always free for you Seungmin." You grinned and put your bag over your shoulder as the boy blushed, letting out an embarrassed chuckle.

"Movie night?" Your lips curved up at his suggestion, smiling as his ears turned red. Rolling his eyes, Seungmin let out a sigh. "I'll see you later, y/n." You watched as walked down the steps and out the door of the lecture hall, leaving you alone to think if you were too much for him to handle, too expressive of your emotions, but how else would you tell him you loved him without him having a cough fit? You haven't told him those 3 words yet, you wanted to. You fought the urge to tell him when you two studied, when you two hung out with friends, every time you saw him. You didn't want to scare your boyfriend, force him into saying it back. So you settled for the sweetest of words, hoping he'd understand without hearing it so bluntly.

Your phone buzzed as you walked to your next class. You answered with a polite smile, "Hey Changbin, what's up?" You frowned as your heard rustling and shouts over the phone. "Hello?" you asked hesitantly, only to hold the phone away from your ear as Changbin screamed you name. "Are you guys okay?" you chuckled. "I just wanted to say... you and Seungmin have the place for yourself's." You widened your eyes at his words, but before you could ask for further explanation the line went dead.

Your last class was spent in thought, what was Changbin implying? Well, you knew what he was implying, but every time you tried to accept it your face started to heat up. Seungmin wouldn't want to do that with you yet, right? You didn't know what he was thinking half the time, but you were positive he wasn't thinking of that. The professor dismissed the class and you soon got a text from Seungmin, telling you he'd meet you outside.

"Hey." You said nicely, giving him a kiss on the cheek before getting his car. "So what movie do you wanna watch?" He asked. You pondered, letting out a playful "Hm?". After a few more seconds you said what you were thinking ever since he asked the question. "Anything you pick will be okay with me." He bit his lip in response, holding in a shy grin, but you grew worried at the lack of response. "Sorry." You let out, your boyfriend was confused at the sudden outburst, ready to ask "for what" until you interrupted. "How about avatar? The one with the blue people!" You chipped. He nodded, giving a soft "Okay" as he pulled into the driveway.

You watched from the dinning table as Seungmin moved around the kitchen, cleaning the dishes and throwing out the bag of chips you two finished throughout the movie. Thoughts were swarming your mind, eventually you gave up keeping them there. Your eyes followed his movements as he smiled and plopped down on the couch next to you. "Am I too much?" Seungmin was taken back by the question, immediately letting out a surprised no and asking why you felt the need to ask.  "I feel like I come on too strong. I just... I like you a lot and..." He watched in worry as you cut yourself short, having an inner conflict as you stared down to your fiddling fingers. You sighed in defeat, it was now or never. "Seungmin, I love you. Okay? It's alright if you don't love m-" "Who said I didn't love you, y/n?" You grew silent. Looking up to be met with his eyes as he stared deeply into yours, watching as you processed his words; you felt uncertain. "Don't say you do if you're no-" You were cut off once again as his lips pressed themselves flush to yours.

Any breaths you were hoping to make were on hold as Seungmin had your mouth preoccupied. Kissing you with passion you've never felt from him. You couldn't even form thoughts as his hands found their way to your cheeks, pressing you impossibly closer to himself. Your chest heaved as he slowly pulled away, looking into your eyes to offer a reassuring smile. "You don't get to tell me how I feel," you stayed silent, not finding the right words to even respond. "I'm gonna show you how I feel, hopefully you'll get it that way. Is that okay with you?" His thumb rubbed over your cheek as he asked you quietly. You nodded, curious of how he'd express himself to you in a way you'd understand.

He glided his hands from your cheeks to your neck, you watched him as he watched his hands. Moving as delicate as he could, not wanting to make any mistakes, not wanting you to second guess his feelings again. You shivered as he leaned in once more, pressing his lips softly to the skin on your jaw. His lips followed right after his hands until he finally reached your shoulder. You gasped as he softly bit, a breath escaped your lips as he started to suck at your skin, leaving the softest marks as his lips traveled back up to your neck.

You were speechless, not ever being touched by him like this before, not being touched with such softness ever. "Go to my room, I'll be there in a second. Okay?" You nodded, closing your eyes as he placed a peck to your forehead. You steadily got up from the couch and tried not to embarrass yourself as you walked to his room. You stood in silence, staring at his perfectly made bed; coming to terms with what was probably going to happen.

"You okay?" You turned around to be met with Seungmin smiling at you softly. You hummed an "mhm", your face heating up as he chuckled. "Why are you just standing there?" he asked. You plop down on his bed in response, trying not to show your nervousness as he locked the door behind him.

"I'm sorry I made you think that I'm not in love with you." Despite how shy his words make you feel, you shook your head at his apology; not wanting to speak as he sat down next to you. "I'm not good with words, you know that." He grabbed your hands, "Of course, I know that." You smiled. "But you also know that I'm much better at actions." Your breath hitched, hiccuping as you spoke back in understanding, "Yeah.. I know that."

Seungmin's hand placed itself on your lower back, without breaking his gaze, he lifted your shirt slightly. "Is this o-" "Seungmin just take it off please." He grinned in amusement, taking off your top slowly. Peering at how your breasts sat comfortably in your white bra, dragging his hand up your arm and cupping the back of your neck. You felt immense pressure under his gaze, his eyes locked on yours, not faltering as you dryly gulped. You felt as if you could really see him, his eyes finally holding emotions you might actually be able to grasp. "S-Seung- '' your talking ceased as he shook his head in dissatisfaction, a playful smile painted on his face. "You don't have to speak this time, I got you."

With a fluttering heart, he kissed you once more. But this time deeper, more passionate than sweet. You sighed into him, letting his hands feel over your chest and torso. One hand buried into your hair, holding the back of your head, and pulling you closer as the other held your naked back for stability. The hand on your back glided up to the hooks of your bra, unbuckling with no warning. You gasped away from his lips, "Sorry," he muttered, trying to clip it together again but you stopped him with a soft grin, moving away from his body to let it fall. "No no it's okay, just surprised me is all."

He tried not to stare, he really did; it made you chuckle. "Here," you grabbed his shaky hands, "touch me." You didn't force him, you just hovered his hands over your mounds. For the first time tonight he broke eye contact, just to see if he was handling you correctly. He clutched the flesh, not squeezing, just holding. "P-play with them." you whimpered. He parted his lips at your command, not sure about what you meant, so he did what he assumed you meant.

"O-oh min-" You gasped as he attached his lips to your left bud, letting you gently fall back onto his bed as he climbed on top of you. His warm tongue swirling around, sucking where he saw fit. Seungmin listens to your whimpers, fascinated with the sounds you were capable of making. "I didn't know you'd be so sensitive here." He says, looking up while pinching your fully hardened nipples. "Is the other one like this too?" You didn't answer, the sensation of him pinching and flicking was too much. You let out a shallow whine as he resumed his assault on the other bud. He was so gentle, and for some reason that made you feel everything at once. Your nerves were heightened, due to the satisfying feeling of him being this close to you. As you unknowingly bucked your hips, but Seungmin did plan trying to stop you, only smiling as your tiny noises made their way to his ears. Finding your reactions to such mediocre sensations, adorable.

"O-off, please." You begged, gesturing to your sweats as your legs suddenly felt too hot. He nodded, "You know what, I don't think I'm doing this right." You let out a breathy "Huh?" as he undid the strings of your sweats, making the move to kiss your smooth thighs as he pulled the thick cloth down your legs. "Am I moving too slow for you, baby?" You grew flustered at the unfamiliar pet name. "B-baby?" You whispered. He stifled a laugh, only showing you his grin as he parted your legs open; kissing the inside of your thighs. "Can you answer my question please?" You tried, but his delicate kisses got closer and closer to your clothed core. "Y-you're doing amazing." He planted a kiss to the covered bud as a thank you. You licked your lips at the teasing action, watching as he looked up at you; hints of mischief laced in his gaze. "Thank you." He grinned, laying a kiss right next to the seam closest to your core. "Just relax for me." His hands soothed the skin on your outer thighs as he laid them on his shoulders, pulling your underwear to the side.

His lips parted at the sight of your glistening heat, cursing under his breath as you dripped to his sheets. "What's got you this wet?'' The rhetorical question has you whining with embarrassment. He laughs softly, his breath hitting your flesh as you timidly squirm at the feeling. "Okay Okay, shhh." He hushed you sweetly as he planted kisses to the inner lips, pressing a chase peck to your clit as, chuckling as you became a little agitated.

"Stop teas-" Your head hits his pillow as he laps up your arousal. "So good." He murmured. Gasps of pleasure were sent out into the air as his tongue reached every part of you he could. Your hands blindly scrambled for something to hold, Seungmin looked up, smiling against your most sensitive area before grabbing your hands and placing them in his hair, only continuing when you got what you needed.

As he sucked and licked your clit, one finger played at your sopping entrance, the lewd sounds amplified as he slowly inserted. All of the sudden you weren't a words person anymore, letting out gasps and shallow whines as you grinned against his tongue, gently tugging at his hair as devoured you. "C-cumming... I'm... keep going" You managed to let out. He curled that one finger, taking his tongue away and replacing it with this skilled thumb. He watched as your back arched, kissing the skin of your pelvis as your body shuddered in his hold.

He eased you though your orgsam, rubbing your clit slowly as he slid his now slicked finger out of your heat, admiring how your walls tried to suck him back in. He hummed lowly, acting your attention as you opened your eyes, lips parting as he tasted your juices off his appendage. You never thought you'd get to see him like this, making you beg for him to be close to you in any way possible. "Are you done for the night?"  You shook your head in protest, "Get naked Seungmin." He laughed at your bluntness, pulling out a condom from his back pocket before unbuckling his pants.

Any remaining thoughts left your mind as you got the sight of his hands; Moving at just the right pace in order to talk off his pants. His views bulking though his silky skin made your mind wonder. After he was done taking off his top, your motor skills had a mind of their own. "Y/n?" he asked curiously as you took one of his hands, holding it up to your lips. His breath hitched as you stuck two of his fingers into your mouth, sucking as you stared deeply into his glossy eyes. Seungmin understood he's got you to a state of mind he's never thought you had, what else did you have in you to make his member leak into his boxers like this? He watched you suck on his fingers with a foggy mind, his dick twitching in his underwear as he imagined what your tongue would feel like around his length.

You released his fingers with a pop, giggling at his dazed out face. He grunted, watching as you placed his hand to your cheek, kissing his palm out of admiration. "Pretty." He trails his hand away from your cheek, placing his palm flat on your belly and grabbing the condom, sliding himself out his boxers, he's eyes never leaving yours. "Are you ready?" You nodded, your gaze fixed on his member, jumping as his hand made contact with the sensitive tip, gliding the latex on easily with the help of his arousal.

"Come here." You say softly, pulling him down by the shoulder to meet your lips for another deep kiss. You whimper, feeling his dick slide through your slicked folds before lining up with your entrance. It's the euphoric feeling, the amazing mind numbing pain of being stretched that makes your eyes roll back as you let out a gasp. "Shhh, I'm right here." He kissed your forehead, your tightly shut eyelids, the tip of your nose, all the way down to your flushed lips, attempting to soothe you in any way possible. Your eyes fluttered open, your gaze never leaving his as he slid in further. Your walls stretched around him until the final inch. At no time did Seungmin's eyes falter from looking into you, catching every emotion you shared with him non-verbally as he gave you time to adjust.

"You're eyes are so pretty." He says bluntly, smiling as you softly hit his chest, not expecting the sudden compliment. He keeps his small grin on his face as he looks down, lifting one of your legs and resting it on his waist. Whimpers fill the room as he begins with a long steady thrust, pushing into you with no rush so you'll feel all of him. He picks up his pace soon after a couple of test thrusts. Your breathing gets labored as he whispers softly into your ear, "So warm. you feel so good." His name falls from your mouth like a soft steady chant as he finds a deeper angle to make you feel the best you ever did. "S-Seung... oh my god." Your mouth falls open as he hits your most sensitive spots perfectly. "Mm, right there?" You frantically nod, wrapping your arm around his shoulders, trying to bring him impossibly closer.

"Fuck," He grunts quietly. Your walls tighten around him as the pleasure overtakes every nerve in your body. Seungmin pulls away from your neck, watching your low glossy eyes and partially parted mouth as whispered profanities and erotic sounds move passed your lips; his name falling in the mix every once in a while. He smiles tiredly, loving the feeling of making you feel this good, his member twitching inside your velvety walls every time he hears his name. "You look so beautiful like this." A low sob-like sound emits from your throat at the praise, biting the skin on his shoulder to stop yourself from getting too carried away.

"I know baby, you're doing so good." He tried not to get too lost either, anchoring himself for the sake of showing you how much you mean to him. But he moans as you tighten particularly around him, groaning as your moans get louder. He can't help but to lift your other leg and wrap it around his waist, briefly telling you to lock your legs around him, you do. Your loud moans turn into gasps as he speeds up, hitting that spongy spot inside you every time. "Fuck you're so good." You spoke, it seems as if he liked the praise as well. "You're fucking me so well." you whispered into his ear, "So big, fills me up s-so well." He whimpered, not expecting such filthy words to escape your lips. "Jesus Y/n." he groans, placing his head into the crook of your neck.

"Cu-um? Pl-lease..." He wasn't sure why you were asking, but what's the fun in saying yes? Even if he was torturing himself in the process. "Hold it for a little while longer baby." That pet name made it even harder for you. "I- I can't, I can't please." You begged, over and over, feeling his dick jump inside of your walls as you clenched around him. "Okay okay, cum baby." And you did, your legs shaking and you tightened even more around him. Seungmin bit down on your shoulder, trying to quiet himself from being too loud. He moaned the loudest he ever did against your skin, panting as his thrusts got sloppy. He spilled into the condom as you ran your fingers through his hair, soothing him though his climax. "I love you Y/n." He panted, looking at you deeply. You grinned, "I love you too."

You were supposed to do your assignments and study when you went over to Donghyuck's dorm, not end up mindlessly flipping through one of his comic books as he does something on your arms. You don't know what he's doing, probably drawing inappropriate drawings to be on arms.

You're half asleep, you know this very well. The warmth of Donghyuck's bed, with the warm rays of the sun that shine through his thin curtains, and his own presence right next to you, it feels incredibly live heaven.

You place the comic book down by your side, opting to take a nap just for a while.

Though your eyes are completely closed, it's still bright from the sun shining into the room, but you manage to somehow fall asleep. You think it's the soft humming coming from Donghyuck that lulls you sleep completely.

And the nice sensation of the tip of a pen dragging against your skin. You really hope he doesn't draw a dick on your arm.

However, the nice soothing sensation stops, and suddenly your eyelids aren't as bright as before, it's as though someone was blocking the sun away from you.

As you peek an eye open, you find your suspicion was correct. Donghyuck is looking down at you with a lopsided smile, head tilting to the side. God, he looks adorable with his messy hair.

Before you know it, he's reached out and pressed 2 heart stickers to each of your cheeks, stroking them to smooth them out. But he does stroke his whole palm against your cheek, and you lean into his gentle touch.

Donghyuck strangely looks like an angel, with the sun shining behind him and a peaceful smile adorning his face, it's mesmerizing. He's mesmerizing.

Donghyuck lifts one of your hands up, and from your wrist, all the way to your shoulder, scatters small drawing of smiley faces and such on your arm. You smile warmly at the sight, finding the deed very endearing.

Your best friend presses his lips to the first drawing he finds on your arm, before he quickly peppers kisses all the way up your arms, the vibrations of his chuckles against your skin feeling blissful.

By the time he's reached your shoulder, he's staring into your eyes with so much emotion, you're not so sure how you can keep up with him.

Donghyuck then presses a kiss to your cheek, right where he stuck the heart sticker, and reaches to press another one to your other cheek with smiley lips.

It's all to fast, or maybe you're just half asleep, but before you know it, Donghyuck has his lips between yours, lightly smiling into your lips. When did he become so bold? For all you know, he's always just been a flirty guy, you never thought your crush since 8th grade actually meant all the flirting.

You deepen the kiss nonetheless, threading your fingers in his oh so messy hair.

It's when he pulls away, when you completely realize what's happened.

"Never knew you were so confident," You breathe out. It blows against his lips, and feels all too good.

"You just looked so kissable."

You raise an eyebrow at this, the corners of your lips curling up, "For a best friend, I don't really think so."

"Yeah?" Donghyuck whispers, "want me to prove it?"