Delibird

in the darkest night,

a brief of light shining bright,

lighten up the sight

- delibird - @Whisper https://t.co/grbuGvjaKO

January 05, 2019

The winter comes by

and covers the ground with snow

as cold as my heart

- delibird - @Whisper http://whisper.sh/w/8lhsja8

January 04, 2019

so you just questioning about how is your heart?

hmm, okay

let me see

let me reverse the question, then

how about the hearts that you've crushed,

for those hearts you've broke?

did you ever just thought about 'em?

did you ever consider about 'em?

how about me?

how about my heart?

how is my heart?

just a little thought, perhaps?

i am 100% sure, never

give 'em hope, then give 'em pain

how come you can be so selfish, you son of a bitch?

it hurts so bad, like some part of you been rip up and taken away

it lefts a big fuckin' hole that could never be healed

how am i heal myself now?

tell me,

how i fix myself?

2018 was a long year, a long long year for me.

It taught me a lot of things,

It taught me

to forgive who mistaken me,

to build a new relationship,

to be more cheerful,

to be brave socially,

to not afraid meeting new people,

to make new friends,

to not afraid and shy for doing what I love and do that even the others mocking you about that,

to think it's okay to be different,

to make peace with myself,

to accept myself as who I am,

to explore new places I've never been before,

to stand on my ground while watching everybody flee before me,

to express myself and my feeling,

to fall for someone for the first time in my life and back it up alive to my feet when no one catch me,

to speak up for myself,

to let go of my beloved one,

to tighten the bound with my old friends,

to try brand new style I've never tried before,

and many more.

I thank you so much for 2018.

And I look forward for 2019 to teach me things like 2018 did.

Footnote :

And yeah, I ain't being gay, but I am gay since I was born, that's two different things.

I was born like this. Always have been and always will be.

And I love someone who doesn't love me back.

He gave signs, I follow the signs, but it was all the false signs.

Turns out, he just wanted me to be his best friend.

It hurts so bad, so so bad that makes me depressed for several weeks before I come back up.

We still friends 'till now, we still talking and sharing about each other a lot like everyday.

Hahaha.

'til now, I still hoping that he will love me back.

But some part of me wanted to erase him, so I am looking for new opportunity of love through apps.

Silly right?