Your changes scares me. How about in the future? it made me step backwards from the original plan. And above all it pains me to see you that way
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@littlehan
Your changes scares me. How about in the future? it made me step backwards from the original plan. And above all it pains me to see you that way

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Dear Diary,
I was out for a while. A lot of things happened never get a chance to share it with you. This year is the heaviest so far. I'm drifting apart acads, family, life and him. You can't believe how my fortune torture me every single day.
Right now, I started to question my worth, Am I still worthy if I achieve nothing? How about my mama and papa, it hurts me. Seeing them so excited and proud of their little girl thinking I'm doing well in academic, graduating and skillful. But the truth is I am no one, I don't know what happen I just woke up stuck in college surviving, no skills, just me surviving. Not even sure If I could graduate on time. NO VOICE at home a mere lower rank family member, who has to follow everything like a dog patronizing, serving its master.
And in school? bruh it doesn't seems like a place for learning anymore it's like a battle field between faculties and students. And here I am onced a fighter but now a wounded soldier accepting a defeat in this rotten system.
And finally, Him. Where did we go wrong mal? Things has changed. You have changed. I don't know at what point I can still hold it. Your actions pushing my feelings away, I hope you'll know how much I'm trying to hold on help me please. Btw its 29th of the month, I miss those old good days.
Night.
To my papang,
Love you pang, your cute little actions secretly sending me 100 without me knowing. Kahit wala na nga halos kayo pambili bigas jan, naiisip mo parin ako.
Inshallah ako naman
It feels heavy:(
Today, I miss you both a little more.

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I'm missing these babies
6.10.25
My wet pillow at night witnessed it all, how harsh the world to me.
I sometimes think if only we're privileged enough I won't have to force my self to live, my papa and mama are not getting any younger
All their lives they're on the street under the scorching sun trying to survive and provide.
6.10.25
Ya allah, help me. Sometimes I think of cruel things and suicidal thoughts, remove this evil inside me. Ameen.
Let me use this platform as my diary
Be free self.
December 13, 2024
CPE312 Week 16
Sometimes in life, end of busy days is a relief but this time, this kind of end is something I couldnāt say a happy end. It was a mixed emotion. All those friday nights will mean a lot to me. The learning, unexpected friendships and little victory of moments we shared will always remains a special spot in my heart. So here we go, it may be a last day but it wonāt affect our usual routine, it was fun actually, weāre all thrilled during the quiz, the eagerness of us to submit on time and get the right answer was so evident. Especially in bonus point in which we have to be alert in the next 10 seconds to immediately count how many ā3ā is displayed in the monitor. Luckily, I got it correctly and aside from that, I felt so satisfied with my drawing in line graph, itās been a while since the last time I do that reason why I kind of took too much of my time for it. At the end of the class my team and I were able to get our papers consulted, Iām glad because finally itās almost done! Weāre almost there and the sleepless nights will be paid off. Happy farewell! till then, Iām Han, signing off.

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December 6, 2024
CPE312 Week 15
Ā Last CPE312 night was full of busy preparation and learning, filled with valuable insights. The day started with the upcoming quiz on my mind, and I knew I had to be well-prepared. I had spent the previous day reviewing all the topics covered so far, focusing on key concepts from the last few lessons. The quiz was coming up fast, and I wasnāt about to leave anything to chance. I woke up early, reviewed my notes one last time, and organized my thoughts. The night before, I had created flashcards for quick memorization and worked through practice problems. I felt ready, but still, there was a sense of nervous excitement. I somehow forgot my nervousness as we started with a discussion of lesson 10 first, aside from learning I got I also somehow felt calm. As the quiz began, I felt a bit of anxiety, but I took a deep breath and reminded myself that preparation was the key. The first few questions were challenging, but I managed to recall the material I studied. I found myself thinking about the intricate details of the topics, like algorithmic concepts and system design principles, all thanks to the hours I spent reviewing. I paced myself, ensuring I understood each question before answering. However, I was mental blocked and couldnāt answer it all. But I long accepted it and keep trying again.
November 29, 2024
CPE312 Week 14
Wellness weak came yet doesnāt sounds like a wellness at all, it was supposed to be a day of calmāa part of Wellness Week designed to let students unwind, recharge, and step away from the usual hustle of academics. However, rest was the last thing on my agenda. Instead, I found myself navigating a packed day of responsibilities, balancing tasks for both my minor subject and our ongoing Data Profiling System project. The day kicked off with preparations for our PIT roleplay. Though itās a minor subject, the roleplay required attention to detail and practice to make sure everything went smoothly. My groupmates and I spent hours fine-tuning our delivery, rehearsing lines, and adjusting every small detail to ensure we were ready to present confidently. It felt like an intense but productive session, leaving us both exhausted and satisfied with our progress. In the afternoon, I shifted gears to focus on our major project for the Data Profiling System. We held a group meeting to discuss updates, tackle issues, and plan our next steps. Collaborating with my teammates always gives me a sense of accomplishment, and seeing how far weāve come as a team made the extra effort worth it.
November 22, 2024
CPE312 Week 13
An announcement came, that sir Carl couldnāt make it today to have a class to us yet we have a lecture video to watch and learn. Here I go expanding my knowledge of APIs (Application Programming Interfaces) through Sir Carlās lecture video. I set aside time to study at home, ready to immerse myself in the topic. Though I encountered an unexpected challenge, the day turned out to be both productive and rewarding. Sir Carlās video was incredibly insightful, explaining how APIs act as connectors, enabling software systems to communicate and share data. I found it amazing how APIs work in terms of requests and responses, serving as the backbone of many applications we use daily. Just as I was in the flow of studying, a power outage struck. It was an unexpected interruption, leaving me unable to watch the lecture or use my computer. Rather than waste time, I reviewed the notes I had already taken and sketched out diagrams to solidify my understanding. Once the power returned, I picked up right where I left off and completed the lecture. Whenever I came across terms I didnāt fully understand, like REST, endpoints, or JSON formatting, I do more search online for additional explanations. The combination of Sir Carlās video and online resources made learning much easier and more enjoyable. Despite the power outage, I ended the day feeling accomplished.
November 15, 2024
CPE312 Week 12
Another day of one of those days in CPE 312 wherein in we explore the Software Reliability and Quality Management indeed this subject holds the key to deliver successful, dependable systems. The lecture began with our instructor introducing the importance of ensuring software reliability. We learned that software reliability isn't just about making the program work; itās about ensuring it works consistently over time, even in varying conditions. The discussion covered handling error detection, and how to ensure a good quality system. I found it amazing how these concepts apply not just to critical systems like medical devices or aviation software but also to everyday applications like social media or online shopping platforms. When the topic shifted to Quality Management, I had a lightbulb moment. Quality isnāt just a one-time thing; it's a continuous process. From proper requirements gathering to meticulous testing, every stage of development plays a part in ensuring the final product meets expectations. We also discussed different quality models like ISO 9000 and how they provide frameworks for maintaining standards. Which actually inspire me to do better and learn smarter, giving me a goal of āif they can maybe I can too?ā after the discussion we had a group work activity, but thereās a twist! we are free to go after writing our names on it. It was also a reminder of the importance of collaboration and lighthearted moments amidst the seriousness of our studies. Little victories, like early dismissals, help keep us motivated for the journey ahead, kidding.
November 8, 2024
CPE312 Week 11
An asynchronous class of CPE312, our group focused on Activity 3 User Manual for our project. We began with a brainstorming session to discuss how to structure the manual and divide the tasks. We agreed that the manual should be user-friendly and aligned with the systemās requirements specification. My responsibility was to provide detailed steps on how to install, access, and use the developed system. I was tasked with ensuring the content was clear, concise, and followed the system requirements. As I began drafting the installation steps, I encountered some confusion regarding the technical aspects of the setup process. To clarify the details, I reached out to our programmer, Alinor Casidar, who provided valuable insights. Alinor explained the necessary dependencies and the exact procedure for installing the system. With this guidance, I was able to write accurate, step-by-step instructions on how users could install the system, access it, and navigate its features. I made sure to align the content with the systemās specifications and included visuals, such as screenshots, to make the instructions easier to follow. By the end of the day, I had successfully completed my section of the user manual. The task not only helped me understand the system better but also highlighted the importance of collaboration and clear communication.

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October 25, 2024
CPE312 Week 10
The deadline for the presentation of performance innovative task in this subject is held today, we are all pressured at the same time worried because what if it wonāt work? Iām too busy for the paper works and only Casidar my team mate is the one keep working hand to hand into the back end of the system therefore I donāt really know if he made it, I went to School 3 hours earlier than the scheduled time of presentation to test the system we made and prepare it for the presentation. I am so glad we did that because we found a new problem into the system which is something we didnāt noticed before, we debug it for almost 2 hours trying to figure out where did we go wrong, luckily Casidar is such a big help he's really good at analyzing and troubleshooting honestly, Iāve learned a lot from him when it comes to this. Ā Ā We burst into happiness as we successfully made it and able to test each feature without errors, by then we are confident enough that we met the required 70% functionality from the rubrics. As the presentation go on, sir Carl have few questions to us, we demonstrate it to him and fortunately able to gain his approval, weāre also thankful for the suggestions sir Carl advised us, making it easier for us to fill the part we missed to comply, what a tiring day yet worth it.
October 18, 2024
CPE312 Week 9
Exam day! As what I am always feeling Iām, nervous thereās a lot of what āifsā in my mind, oh how I miss to have decent 8-hour sleep but I guess that doesnāt exist in college. I am confident to answer the exam, my sleepless night will be worth it I manifested that. Honestly, it was kind of hard because the day before this is 3 consecutive exams for different subject so it really gives me a hard time to study more at a right time, I was just hoping that all of the topics I reviewed will come out in the test paper. As the exam started, I feel worried because I focused too much in studying the process of the lecture and its application analysis but the exam is a multiple choice based on a definition. I expected something worst little did I know it wonāt go that way. I havenāt studied the easier one, then now Iām having a hard time, but despite of that I really tried my best to recall everything my stock knowledge is out of stock already bi think Iām 50% sure of my answer. I feel bad and motivated to strive even harder for the next term.