cherry

is it foolish of me to think about you you who no longer belongs to my world? is it foolish of me to talk about you you who no longer belongs to my world? should i be happy or anguished that a piece of my heart, that i had once placed in the warmth of your palms crossed the celestial bounds and accompanied you to your new home? should i be happy, that you have been sent far far away from these demons in disguise of humans or should i be anguished, for i have been parted from my dearest and haven't the guts to lodge beside you

is it foolish of me to remember you you who no longer belongs to my world is it foolish of me to cherish you you who no longer belongs to my world having no one to blame, i blame myself for not noticing, for not being there for you how hard must it have been for you for you to make such a decision. for you to leave behind all your loved ones. how many scars did you bear? for you to feel like giving us one huge scar would be alright?

is it foolish of me to still love you you who no longer belongs to my world is it foolish of me to still care for you you who no longer belongs to my world how much did you endure alone, without breathing a word to us which made us incapable, incapable of conveying any number of words to you oh an year has it been. time sure does fly, slow for some, fast for few. which one was it for me? clueless i stand, for you is all that fills my thoughts time is no matter when what matters most has disappeared disappeared from my sight only. sight only. for you still reside in my heart in innumerable people's hearts for the person you were was too huge pieces of you remain in each of us and till our grave shall we carry them, engraved in our hearts.

is it foolish of me that i still feel your presence you who no longer belongs to my world is it foolish of me that i carry your essence you who no longer belongs to my world you were loved. you were appreciated. you were adored. i hope you know this, for if you don't a million pieces will become of what remains of my heart what remains of my heart, after giving most of it away away to you, in hopes of you holding it safe, safe in the warmth of your palms well, i have no doubt it's safe. it's safe with you, torn apart from me, far away in your new world.

is it foolish of me to make you a part of my day you who no longer belongs to my world is it foolish of me to still believe i could run to you you who no longer belongs to my world your name shall be spoken of, your legend shall be remembered, till those who love you leave the world i am in, to join your new home. to join your new home and love you more there.

She ran to get the door when Vernon rang the bell, leaving her just as breathless as were they. “Hi?” Sukee said to the both of them. Vernon just walked past his sister muttering the same word again and again, which sounded like ‘shorter’ but with context she could figure out he meant water so she went to get him some water right after Mingyu greeted her with a wide smile and a small wave.

After the guys caught their breath and had a glass of water each, she finally asked, “Now why would you climb 11 flights of stairs instead of just taking the elevator?” To which Vernon tried to hold his laughter, while Mingyu glared at him, which only made him burst into laughter. Since he couldn’t stop laughing, Sukee just looked at Mingyu hoping he would answer, thankfully he did understand her non-verbal cue and spoke. “He is so wily. I can’t believe I fell into another one of his traps. He made me believe that people normally can’t climb stairs after the 10th flight and that’s why there’s no stairs further than that. And I argued that that’s not true, and they probably have a different reason for not having stairs above 10th floor. Since I always used the elevator, I even believed the first half of what he said, but he kept trying to convince me which made me want to prove him wrong, and that is why…” he pointed at Vernon who was only laughing harder listening to his best friend narrate. “And only after reaching the 10th floor and seeing the staircase that led to the next floor did I realise that I was actually tricked.”

She couldn’t help but laugh too but as soon as she realised that Vernon hadn’t brought anything from her favourite restaurant as he promised, you were puzzled.  “Hey, how come you didn’t bring me any food when that was why you went out in the first place?”

Vernon put his arm around Mingyu’s shoulder and said, “I thought I could bring home your favourite chef instead of just your favourite food.” Mingyu tilted his head, “I am her favourite chef?” Vernon just nodded because his sister was looking at him with eyes that said, “if you dare speak more, I’ll rip your intestines and feed them to some animals.” Mingyu, unaware of that, just blushed at the thought of being her favourite, even if it was just as a chef.

Vernon who noticed that, smirked while she was still giving him that glare. Mingyu, on the other hand, was too busy admiring the way Sukee’s hair fell behind her shoulders, all the way till her waist, the way half of her collarbones peeped out of her boat neck top, the tiny studs that she wore on her ears, and also looked at the new addition to her accessory collection; her new nosepin. Oh, what that did to him, she could never imagine. He quickly snapped out of his thoughts as he heard her sweet voice slide into his ears like music.

“Okay, so what are we doing for lunch though?” she ask, with her hands on her tummy.

The way she pouted with her hands on her tummy as she asked drew a smile on his face. “I’m cooking for us, today and till the end of next week.”

“That’s what I was about to tell you, before you started threatening me with your eyes. He’s going to be staying with us for a couple of weeks because he’s moving but is homeless right now. His house doesn’t get ready till the end of next week.”

That was hard for her to digest. To live under the same roof as her crush, the Mingyu, that was one task she would say. First of all, she would have to talk to him, second of all, she would have to do that without letting him in on her huge crush, third of all, she would have to stop herself from throwing herself at him. Now wasn’t that tough?

“Alright, is he sharing your room or are we clearing the study?” she asked, trying to keep her composure.

“I’m fine even with sleeping on the couch, you guys needn’t change anything for me, I’m only here for a couple of weeks.” Mingyu said in the sweetest voice with his cute puppy eyes that his best friend’s sister found so irresistible.

Vernon side eyed Mingyu, “You’re staying here for a couple of weeks, and as the good hosts we are, we’re going to make you the most comfortable we can, so stop trying to adjust and just make yourself feel home. Who knows, you might want to get used to living with other people already.”

There was a hint of panic on Mingyu’s face, but he didn’t say anything and just shrugged.

“Help me clear the study while I go help Gyu bring his stuff, will you Sukee?” Vernon asked. If it was someone else, his sister would’ve been annoyed, but she wasn’t, because things were always different when it came to “her Gyu”.

It had been a couple of days but she had yet to have spoken more than a few basic words to him. It was mostly just, “Pass me the water” or “excuse me” or “where’s this/that” or “oh it’s here.”

That was improvement too for her, but she had to try to talk to him for things to not be too awkward between them for as long as he was there. And since Vernon couldn’t stand by and watch his sister and his best friend waste their opportunity, he called for a movie marathon. Of course, Vernon was in charge of preparing the movie list. Mingyu was in charge of the snacks and Sukee was in charge of the drinks. And once again, he stepped his game up by sending them both shopping together.

The car ride was silent, but what was new? Well, Sukee caught him stealing glances at her through the rear view mirror a couple of times, which flustered her but also made her wonder why, so she decided to ask. “Do you have something to tell or ask me?”

“Why do you sound so formal, are you here for an interrogation or something???” She beat herself up in her mind.

Mingyu cleared his throat. “Beautiful.” He said that in such a small voice that she couldn’t even tell if he had spoken or not, if not for catching his lip movement. “Pardon?” She asked hoping he would be audible this time.

He fixed his eyes onto the road and said, “You’re beautiful is what I said.” Refusing to look at her, he couldn’t believe what he had just said. The first ever proper sentence he said to his crush was that. What would she think of him? Some fuckboy flirting around just to sleep with her? He wasn’t thinking that way baselessly, it was true that many mistook him for such a person when he just genuinely complimented people when he felt like they deserved it.

“Thank you. You are beautiful too.” She barely managed to pull words out of her mouth as she was already imagining her future with him.

“Get a hold of the reality Sukee, that was one compliment, that’s all. Don’t get all delulu!!”

Once they both were done shopping, Mingyu carried the heavy bags leaving “his pretty girl” to only carry the bag that had his tissues, glasses and his shaving kit. Vernon let them in as soon as he heard his little sister knock with her elbow, well aware that they couldn’t possibly be able to fetch their keys and get the door themselves while carrying all the shopping bags.

Each of them got working to set up the screen, food and beverages. After they all finally settled down, Vernon started playing the first movie. They all watch so intently, as if they were all one of those characters and that was her life story.

By the first quarter of the second movie, Vernon got up saying his boyfriend had an emergency. Everyone knew Seungkwan was just dramatic like that and his emergencies could easily just be “lack of cuddles” or “how could I possible not fall asleep in my boyfriend’s arms” but Vernon still ran to him at each call, which was kind of cute. And well, there was no harm in that, he lived only a couple of apartments away.

“I have to go to Kwannie right now, but you guys are going to stay up and finish the rest of the movies too!” He signalled them that he had his eyes on them and rushed to the door after grabbing his jacket.

Sukee looked at Mingyu. He held her gaze and she stayed like that for a minute or so, oblivious to the movie playing in the background. But a loud noise from the movie brought back her attention to it, or at least their gazes. Because they were definitely looking at the movie on the screen, but neither of them was thinking about that for a few minutes. Then slowly they were paying attention to the movie again.

Around the middle of the third movie, almost all the snacks were gone except for a bowl of nachos and 3 cans of soda. Both of them had to scoot closer to reach the bowl. The moment her shoulder came in contact with his arm, she was intoxicated, and so was he. But both of them tried their best not to show it.

The close proximity didn’t allow either of them to focus on the movie. She was too tired to even keep her eyes open, they were just forced to stay open because of the person beside her. She was no longer shy and filled with thoughts about her future with him, she was completely in the present, just thinking about him sitting next to her. That was good, that made her feel like that was probably the moment where she had to start talking to him.

She paused the movie and turned to sit facing him. He shifted to a position mirroring her and looked at her as if he was expecting her to do something.

“So where are you moving to?” Sukee asked, her voice giving her sleepiness away.

“You will be surprised if you know that actually. I’m moving in to this place, the empty apartment right across this one.” He said pointing down, indicating her apartment.

“Oh, we’re going to be neighbours? Might as well break the ice and get to know you better then!”

He couldn’t stop smiling because this was the most that she had ever spoken to him and she had never seemed so excited. Maybe it was the night, maybe it was the tired, maybe it was the sugar, Mingyu had no idea which one of those it was but she looked prettier than ever, he could see stars in her eyes. But he soon realised that he had to reply.

“Yes, that would be great. Where shall we start?” He asked, trying to sound as confident as possible in hopes of hiding his nervousness. Right then, a few strands of her hair fell over her face. Mingyu couldn’t bear the hair covering her visuals, so he reached out to fix her hair. His heart wasn’t helping him, already, but his best friend’s little sister just had to make it worse. She just had to hold his hand. She kept his hand in hers as she asked her first question.

“Let’s skip the obvious, because we do know each other through Vernon. Let’s talk about things he wouldn’t have shared with us, personal stuff.” She shifted a little to adjust her legs but she still didn’t let go of his hand. After a while actually, Sukee even held his other hand too.

Dwelling deep into both of their pasts and getting to know each other well, her crush only became bigger and bigger. He was no good either, he kept falling deeper and deeper for her the more she revealed about herself. The way they both understood each other was new to them. It was as if no one else could ever understand them the way they understood each other.

Vernon was welcomed home by the picture of her and Mingyu all cuddled up on the couch, sleeping against each other. He smiled and tiptoed to not wake them up.

“Darling, you left your phone back at my place!!” Seungkwan entered, screaming at the top of his lungs, waking vernon’s sister and his best friend up. Both of them were so confused to find themselves in such close proximity, not to mention that their bodies were stuck to each other like they had been glued together. Vernon was looking at Seungkwan with an upset face. “Did I do something wrong hun?” He asked, to which Vernon replied, “I wanted to click a picture of them like that.” Seungkwan stood there with an “oops” written all over his face. Both of them break the connection and immediately headed to each other’s rooms and got refreshed for the day.

A few days passed by, both of them slowly became friends. Vernon joked about them being cute together all the time, just to see both of them act all flustered and speechless. But they had really bonded and she didn’t want him to leave even if it was just right across the hall.

She was making breakfast for herself, that was a rare sight. But it was Saturday and she had a lot of time for herself. She liked to keep it simple so she just went for omelette, toast and some smoothie. While she was switching on the frying pan for the omelette, she felt someone creep their hands around her waist. She almost dropped the bowl of beaten egg but she froze when she felt a chin rest on her shoulder.

“Let’s stay like this for a moment.” Sukee heard Gyu’s raspy morning voice. She had no idea what was going on and why. She was going insane while he was there resting his head on your shoulder and back-hugging her calmly. “Is he drunk?” was all she could think of. She turned off the pan and waited for him to pull himself away from her so that she could cook with full focus.

In about 5 minutes, he detached himself and just walked back to his room as if nothing had happened. Whenever she tried to bring that incident up, he would either change the topic or act as if he didn’t know what she was talking about. He denied the happening so much that she almost started believing that she was just so delusional that she had started hallucinating. Once she was completely convinced that it had never happened, she started acting normal with him again, till he…

The four of them were drinking, talking, playing games, etc. Seungkwan kept signalling Vernon to follow him out once he left. It was so obvious that even Sukee and Mingyu caught on but Vernon didn’t notice. Seungkwan just got up, “For god’s sake!” he exclaimed and left, leaving Vernon extremely confused.

“Go after him.” Both of them said in unison. Vernon smirked at the sight of the two of them momentarily and ran to catch up with his boyfriend.

“I bet they’re making out, that’s why Kwan called Vernon out. Ah, how I wish I could do that too. Well, of course not with Vernon, but you know what I mean, right? I don’t even have to explain myself-” Sukee stopped rambling when she noticed that Mingyu stared at her intently with a wide smile plastered to his face. “Why are you looking at me like that?” she asked.

“You wish you could do what? Make out with someone?” He asked with a smirk. It was probably the alcohol running in his blood that made him feel so confident. Without even waiting for her response, he said, “I could make that wish come true.”

He pulled her chair closer to his, such that he had one of his hands on the side of her chair and the other on air right above her thigh, looking at her face for approval. She nodded and he rested his hand on her thigh. He started leaning into her face. The closer he got, the louder she heard his breath, the hotter she felt, the sweatier her palms became, the harder it became to keep her eyes on his. Once again, he stopped, right in front of her face, his lips almost touching hers. Dangerous. Very dangerous. She wanted to lean in and kiss him. That was what she wanted to do the most. But she didn’t. Instead, she pulled away and excused herself to bed.  

Mingyu stared at her door as she slammed it shut. He kept staring for a while before he went to bed too.

She left early in the morning next day and stayed a couple of nights at Seungkwan’s. She asked Seungkwan not to ask her anything but well, he was him. “So, when are you going to tell me what happened? You seem very off, I’m pretty sure you’re crashing at mine only because something has happened and not because this is one of our extended sleepovers.”

She sighed heavily. Where would she start? With the almost kiss? With the hallucination? With her crush moving in and also becoming her soon-to-be-neighbour? With her huge crush on him ever since she met him?

She decided to spill anyway, thinking that even if Seungkwan couldn’t probably help her with it, he could at least give her an ear.

Seungkwan only promoted communication as if he was endorsed.

But was the man wrong? Nope. She couldn’t just run away like that. Either she had to go back and pretend nothing happened or if he wanted to talk about it, she had to tell him the truth. But she needed some time before she could face him, so she decided to stay at Seungkwan’s for another night.

There was a huge power cut, and this was the peak of summer. She couldn’t possibly wear the clothes that she brought along and feel comfortable, so she went up to get her clothes. And who knows? Maybe she will find some courage to just stay there.

She went in and got changed into a spaghetti strap crop top with a pair of shorts. She wished she could walk around shirtless, that was how hot it was. She ran into Mingyu as she came out of her room, he was standing there wearing a black tank top, his hair, that he was growing out was pushed to the sides of his face.

“We need to talk” he said. His eyes weren’t laid on hers, instead they were looking for a place to look at other than her chest, she didn’t notice at first because she was doing the same. “Sure.” She said and followed him to the couch.

“Could you get me some water?” His best friend’s little sister asked him in order to buy some time for preparing herself to talk. Mingyu came back with water and sat next to her, quite close, she was taken aback. Sukee drank the water. “Thank you, so what is it that you want to talk about?”

“First of all, please come back, I feel so bad that you’re staying away from your own home just because of me.” He said with those puppy eyes that made her so weak. But she was determined to stay strong. “Who said it’s because of you? You’re delusional.”

He knew he deserved that so he didn’t counter that, instead he continued. “Second of all, I’m sorry I acted as if nothing happened the day I back-hugged you. I panicked. I thought you would be disgusted. I thought you would hate me for doing that, without even asking you too. I just, I just really want you to not hate me.” She just listened carefully, seeing her nod, he continued with the confirmation that she was listening.

“Third of all, this one’s a question, why did you run away that night? If you had just said no, I would’ve known you weren’t interested. But because you ran away without saying anything, my mind wouldn’t rest, I have constantly been thinking about that night. You let me come so close to you, but didn’t let me kiss you. It’s okay if you didn’t want to, I would understand that. But it clearly looked like you wanted to but then you thought of something and backed out. Why, Sukee?”

He called your name, looking like a lost puppy but also his body covered with sweat and a sexy black top and a pair of shorts that rode up to his mid thighs. He was talking seriously, she had to focus.

“Stay strong Sukee!! Serious talk!!!” She thought to herself.

“Well…” she took a moment to gather her thoughts.

“So, I am back. I just have to bring a few more things back here. It was because of you. The day you back-hugged me and then pretended it never happened made me think that you were just toying with my feelings or that you just tried something and your really hated it so you just ran away from the truth. And then, to answer your question, I didn’t kiss you because pretending that the back hug never happened was painful enough, I couldn’t even imagine how much it would hurt to kiss someone I like and then pretend it never happened just because you didn’t like it. That’s why I didn’t kiss you and instead of talking to you I chose to run away from the truth once too. Let’s call it even.”

Mingyu patted her head and pulled her into a hug. He nuzzled his head into her neck and whispered into her ears, “Dumbo! I like you, that’s why I back-hugged you and tried to kiss you and everything. But I panicked. I thought you might think I was taking advantage of you; I didn’t even consider the possibility of you liking me back because I am Vernon’s best friend, he’s your brother and I thought you would only see me as another brother. I’m sorry I hurt you like that, will you give me a chance to show you how much I like you and that I will try my best not to hurt you and even if I did, I’ll fix it in the best way ever.”

“Are we doing speeches?” she asked as she chuckled. “I’m still shocked that you like me back. Apology accepted, I’m sorry too for hurting you by running away instead of talking to you about the kiss we almost had.” She pulled away from the hug and look into his eyes.

“Apology accepted. Now why don’t we remove that almost?” He said as he leaned in. She could feel her noses touch and his breath falling on hers. Slowly she leaned in too and kissed him. He kissed her back slowly for a while, and then it changed. It became anything but slow, it became thirsty, hungry, driven. He was almost eating her mouth. He parted his lips from hers for her to catch her breath as he trailed kisses along her cheeks to her jawline, to her neck.

Leaving a couple of hickeys on her neck, he moved down to her collarbones and then looked up at her as if he were asking for something.

“What is it?” she asked as she also kissed his neck. “T-take off. Can I take o-off your top?” He tried to talk while catching his breath as she kept kissing his neck.

She nodded into the kiss. He took her top off and stopped she from kissing his neck. He was admiring her body, the way she was carefully sculpted by the angels. Forget it, she was an angel herself to him. The staring made all the blood in her rush to her cheeks. “Can you stop staring?” she asked.

He raised an eyebrow and said, “How could I possibly not look at the beauty in front of me?” He placed tiny kisses on her chest and below.

“You do know that I like you, right Sukee?” He asked. She cupped his face and made him meet her eyes. “I like you, you like me. Now since our facts have been established can we continue what we were doing?” She asked, her eyes filled with desire. He just continued without a word.

“I can’t believe you have to move already.” She pouted. He patted her head and said, “I’m right across the hall, princess. But if it’s that unbearable you can move in with me anytime you want.”

“You’re so sweet for saying that even if it was just empty words.” She kissed his forehead.

He kissed her forehead back and said, “I meant every single word I said, you can come over any time you want, you can even move in with me if you wish.”

Vernon emerges out of nowhere, “I’m going to start another part time job if I have to pay the rent all by myself. I’ll go look for new jobs then, you lovebirds keep it up then.”

He went to Seungkwan’s.

“I told you this plan would work, didn’t I?” Seungkwan said with such a proud look on his face.

“What happened? Are you okay? Does it hurt too much? What happened to your finger?” Mark threw continuous questions at Haechan without even breathing, giving no gap for the younger to answer his train of questions while he eyed the counter to find out what happened. He spotted a knife and freaked out even more. “Who asked you to touch a knife? No. Never mind. It’s all my fault. I should have never allowed you into the kitchen. This isn’t the first time you hurt yourself in here. I should have known better-“ Mark was interrupted by Haechan’s laughter.

He looked up baffled on one hand and relieved on the other, realising that his lover was just joking. He’s glad that Haechan isn’t hurt in reality but is also very angry that he would joke about something like this.

“Leave the kitchen, I’ll cook for us,” were the last words that escaped Mark’s mouth that evening. He didn’t talk to the younger throughout the day and even in their long drive to NoMin’s engagement party.

Haechan did try to get Mark to talk to him, but the older wouldn’t budge. Not even when he pulled out the trump card: aegyo. Not the weird funny kind that he does all the time to annoy his friends, but actually being cute, for which Mark melted every single time. Even then he was, he just was as good at hiding it as much as he melted internally.

The younger was a bit upset for the rest of the ride.

Although, as soon as Chenle opened the door for them and he heard the music and his friends’ voices he was happy. For a short while. Till he realised that Mark was still avoiding him. He tried to be as cheerful as he could throughout the party so that no one else would notice, and luckily, he succeeded with that. But he couldn’t fool Mark. The older knew something was off, but he couldn’t give in so quickly this time. He was way too angry about the joke. He was still avoiding him even as they left the party.

Mark was so immersed in avoiding him that he failed to notice that Haechan had been very dull throughout their drive home. He’d been very gloomy in the elevator and didn’t even look at the older. There was an uncanny silence between them, which was when Mark got his cue that he went too far, for Haechan was always running his mouth from one random topic to another, but not a word rolled off his lips that night.

Seeing Haechan like that was something the blond could never get used to. It was always as if the silence were a katana piercing through his delicate heart. But Mark was smart, it was their 3rd year into this relationship, not to mention the 2 long years of pining. Mark knew exactly what he could do to make his lover feel better.

Haechan heard a knock on his door. He didn’t want to get out of bed, but he didn’t want to talk either. But looked like he had no choice but to respond, as the knocking continued, even after he sent Mark a text to just come in.

“Come in.” He said feebly, all cozily covered with his blanket and ready to explore dreamland. Mark entered the room with a small breakfast-in-bed setting, except it would be dinner given that it was nearly midnight.

“I prepared a little something for you. I noticed you didn’t eat much at the party.” The older placed the table on the bed as the younger adjusted his blanket and sat up.

“I’m sorry I avoided you too much. I was just too mad about the joke you made earlier this day. I was so worried about you because there hasn’t been one good experience of yours in the kitchen. So my heart jumped out of my rib cage when I heard your shout of pain. I was very relieved when I found out you weren’t actually hurt. However, I felt like such an idiot, caring so much about you when you were just playing around. I felt so mad that you would joke about something that serious.”

Haechan’s eyes were no longer filled with sadness, they held a delicate look that was filled with care. He finally spoke.

“I didn’t think it would affect you that much, I’m sorry. I just saw this prank in a movie and I wondered how you would react. I won’t do this again. I won’t even come near the kitchen. Not even 100 meters close to it. I swear.”

Mark burst into a laugh. “Are you not planning on being home ever?”

“You know what I meant.” Haechan laughed and playfully hit Mark’s shoulder.

Mark shook his head and started feeding Haechan.

“I’ll eat this now, but I’m expecting dessert too.” Haechan said with a smirk.

“Why did you agree to babysit Daegal when you’re not even free?” Mark asked.

Haechan replied with his eyes glued to the tv, “Well, I didn’t exactly check my schedule. I said yes as soon as I heard her name, Daegal. Not my fault she’s so cute and I want to do anything and everything for her.”

A Pororo plushie flew straight into Haechan’s face, right on his nose.

“Ow!” he screamed.

The scream being too loud, Mark actually got worried and checked if Haechan was fine.

Looking at his nose that was now pink, Mark said, “All you need is an ice pack. This is nothing, stop being dramatic.”

The older boy went to fetch an ice pack for the younger, as he was just sitting there, switching through the channels on the tv. Mark’s phone ringed with a few notifications, and very conveniently it was right next to Haechan so he could feed his curiosity.

Oh, how he wished he never saw that.

Yuta had texted Mark. Haechan stormed off to the fridge himself, ears red from feelings which he couldn’t identify whether they were anger or jealousy or hate towards himself for not acting sooner. He snatched the ice pack from Mark and sent him off to check his phone.

yuta : mark yuta : MARK yuta : MARK !!! yuta : we’re going to rainbow café yuta : red velvet cake and americano, sound’s tempting eh? yuta : 7pm tomorrow yuta : before you ask, yes this is a date mark : hey man woah mark : okay wait mark : I’ll lyk by tonight yuta : quick mark : yessir

Haechan locked himself up in his room for the rest of the evening. He read the messages on the notifications and realised that he had to do something before his stupid fat crush on Mark is put to an end without him even getting an opportunity.

He would rather die than become Mark’s best man for his wedding with Yuta. Even the stupid thought made his blood boil up. He decided to confide in his best friend instead of overthinking alone.

He called Jaemin and started ranting about the whole situation. Jaemin being Haechan’s best friend since middle school knew everything about him and knew what exactly he needed to tell Haechan for him to man up and ask Mark out.

“Hey there’s no use in thinking how Yuta got ahead of you. You are literally around Mark always… well, except when he’s in class, but you get my point. You should have manned up and asked him out first. It’s you who brought yourself here. Did Mark give Yuta a reply?”

“No, I kind of stormed into my room as soon as I saw those messages.”

“Dumbass!” Jaemin said. “You should go find out if Mark is interested or not first, if he is considering it then go stop him, if not just ask him out. Mark isn’t the type to make it weird between you guys just because you asked him out, right?”

“Yes, yes, I know mom. I’ll go find out and do what I can.” Haechan let out a long sigh. Patting his cheek a bit hard, he pulled his senses together. “Did I interrupt your date again or something?”

“Took you long enough. Jeno’s getting upset now, I have to go. Update me through text or call me tomorrow. Bye.”

“Bye Jaem.”

Haechan searched his room for water only to find an empty bottle. He dragged himself to the kitchen for some water. As he was filling his bottle with some water, he unintentionally overheard Mark talking to someone on call.

Keyword : unintentionally.

“I seriously don’t know man. What if things get weird. We literally live under the same roof. I don’t know if I can handle it and I really don’t want to move out too.”

There was a small gap where Mark only let out a few “oh”s and “maybe”s.

Unaware of what or who Mark was talking about, a nervous Haechan gulped down a whole bottle of water.

“Okay, maybe it’s time to face it? I’m still not sure though. I’m going to wait actually. Yeah. I’ll wait and test the waters first. Anyway, thanks for listening dude, see you tomorrow.”

The older hung up.

Haechan quickly refilled his bottle and headed back into his room as he heard footsteps moving towards the kitchen.

He couldn’t help but think that Mark had already caught on and was thinking about how to reject him. Worriedly, he paced back and forth in his tiny room. Starting to feel a bit dizzy, he sat down and told himself that he had to do it that day, whether it was a yes or a no, he had to get it done that day because if not then, then never will he ever have the balls to ask super popular cute Markie boy who was the dream boy of every person who was interested in men, even slightly.

Knock. Knock.

“Dude can you come out and help me make dinner?”

Haechan yelled through the door, “I’ll be there in 5, till then think about what you want to make.”

“Alright man.” Mark said and walked back to the kitchen.

Haechan walked out to the kitchen as if he wasn’t internally screaming with every step he placed on the floor. Mark Lee. How could that man look so breathtaking even by just standing and staring at a box of eggs.

“Just staring at them won’t get them cooked... Or are you just waiting to call Gordon Ramsay?”

Mark almost jumped out of his clothes. Of course, it was easy startling the boy.

“Okay since you’ve been staring at eggs, you must have an idea. What do you want to make?”

Mark grabed another apron for Haechan and got closer to him to put it on him. “I want pasta. Now turn around.”

Suddenly getting ballsy, Haechan said, “And why should I listen to you?”

“Okay, you have no reason to listen to me so don’t.” Mark said as he got even closer and put the apron on Haechan and was practically hugging him to tie it up behind.

Haechan stood there still, as if he were participating in a statue game.

Mark started getting the vessels and turned some music on. “Standing there won’t get pasta done, you know?”

“Right.” Haechan said and started helping Mark.

Now. It’s the right time to strike, he thought.

“So… uh I accidentally saw your messages on notifications. Are you going out with Yuta?”

Mark froze. He wanted to talk about an entirely different topic with him tonight. He didn’t even think of Yuta getting in the way.

“Well, I’m only considering it still… Honestly, I don’t know what to do man.” Mark said as he opened the fridge to get the cheese out.

He felt Haechan turning him over, such that he’s facing Haechan and his back’s facing the fridge. The cold air on his back felt colder because with Haechan’s sudden action his senses shot up their sensitivity.

Mark just stood there, literally frozen, staring into Haechan’s soul.

Haechan finally opened his mouth. “Don’t go.”

That’s all he said as he put his hands on the fridge, leaving mark in between his arms, staring intensely into the shivering boy’s eyes.

“Are you talking to me dude?” Mark said, blinking a bit too much now.

“No, I’m talking to the fridge. You’re just in my way.” Haechan rolled his eyes.

Mark was utterly confused and let out a small “Oh.”

Haechan moved closer, leaving no gap between them. “No, you dumbass. I’m talking to you. Don’t go on a date with Yuta.”

Although it was Mark against the fridge, Haechan was trembling more from the nervousness. Took Mark a minute to even react to what Haechan said.

“My back’s getting cold.”

Yeah, it took him one minute to even reply, and the best he could say was “My back’s getting cold.” !?!??!??!?!?

Haechan stepped back, leaving way for Mark to move. Mark did move, but he stepped closer to Haechan.

“So you just asked me not to go out with Yuta… why?”

“Isn’t it obvious?” Haechan replied.

Mark just shook his head.

“Okay see I won’t repeat this, it’s okay if you say no. I mean, I don’t know… just whatever your reply is, please listen to me fully and take your time to think about it I don’t mind waiting a few hundred years. I could just become sleeping beauty.”

Mark shook Haechan to stop him from talking. “Hyuck. Calm down. What’s it?” He asked patiently.

“The thing is… Doyouwanttogoonadatewithmeinstead?”

“Sorry what?” Mark took a second to understand what he said. “Oh. OH!”

“So…? Okay no. I’m not going to rush you. Take your time, think carefully because I don’t want to get hurt. I really like you.”

“Hyuck…” Mark melted in his lion cub slippers. “I was going to talk to you about this over dinner.”

Mark took a couple steps closer, leaving no gap between them.

“Yes.”

Haechan couldn’t believe his ears. “You said yes? Like “Yes, Hyuck I’ll go on a date with you.” yes?”

Mark laughed, “Yes, I’ll go on a date with you, and since we’re both oblivious idiots and thankfully you’ve spelt it out, I think it’s my turn now.”

With that Haechan was trapped in a kiss by Mark Lee.

MARK LEE KISSED HIM?????????

He couldn’t believe it but he felt really happy. His long-time crush on his roomie had finally been reciprocated? He no longer had to rant about every single thing Mark did, like breathe or even opening his eyes, to Jaemin, he could do that to the Mark Lee himself. Oh, how happy he was.

Mark pulled away but still kept his face close to Hyuck’s. “I like you too, seemed like you didn’t catch on either.”

A blushing mess Haechan became at that spot. Mark took his phone out.

“Now that you know and I wanted to do this anyway…”

mark : I can’t go out with you tomorrow mark : or any day anymore mark : I have someone now yuta : oh… well, congratulations ig mark : IN YOUR FACE NAKAMOTO YUTA yuta : what. mark : sorry that was hyuck- yuta : oh he’s the one you’re with? mark : yes yuta : alright, you guys have fun, bye. mark : bye.

Mark hit Haechan playfully on his shoulder. “Why did you do that?”

“Because now the world needs to know you’re mine and I’m yours. Just to be clear, since neither of us asked this. Would you like to be my boyfriend, Mark Lee?” Haechan asks with a widespread smile plastered onto his face.

“How can I say no to you Hyuck. Of course, I’d love to be your boyfriend, if you would be mine.”

“We’re boyfriends now. Yay!”

“I’m like very happy for us right now dude but I’m hungry too.” Mark said followed by a small grumble by his stomach.

we chose this day for a reason, of course. the very same reason that everyone dislikes the day for. since it’s right in the middle of the week, unable to have hope for the weekend but also unable to loosen up because the week just started.

to not hate the day like the rest, and to have some motivation, every wednesday is our recharge day.

wednesday 7pm is the one moment I wait for every week. I get to see my tiger baby. well, I was forced into calling him tiger baby and then it kinda grew on me, but no, I will not admit that in front of him… getting back to the point, it’s 5:50pm right now, I’m stuck at my desk for 10 more minutes for me to clock out. all I have to do is check some data and mail it to seungkwan and I’m done.

y/n : baby y/n : babe y/n : babbbbbbeeeeeeeeeeeee y/n : babyeyeeyeyye y/n : baaaaaaaaabeyeyey tiger baby <3 : I’m assuming ur not drunk yet and ur juz missing me y/n : bingo y/n : can’t wait to see u later tiger baby <3 : same babe tiger baby <3 : i’ll pick u up at 7 y/n : luv u tiger baby <3 : luv u too tiger baby <3 : now finish up soon and leave tiger baby <3 : need to see u at 7 sharp y/n : can’t even waste a moment without me eh? tiger baby <3 : bingo y/n : not u using my “bingo” when u say it’s weird all the time tiger baby <3 : sometimes I like to flatter u y/n : right tiger baby <3 : see u soon y/n : see u luv

okay. I’ve got this.

using 7pm as my motivation yet again, I checked the data pretty quickly and mailed it too. but the thing is, I’ve mailed it to seungkwan. and he’s definitely going to be here in 3, 2, 1—“missed me already?”

rolling my eyes in the most noticeable way, i replied coldly.

“it’s a work mail, seungkwan. get over it.”

“oh come on, we all know you love me.” he said with playfully shiny eyes and smug all over his face.

as much as he was cute, he was annoying too and he was fixated that I was in love with him, despite the fact that I made it very clear that I had a boyfriend, multiple times at that.

“in your dreams.”

“at least there then.” he winked and left.

not having enough time for seungkwan’s drama, I packed up quickly and headed home, right as it ticked 6.

getting all excited for the date, I couldn’t erase the smile off my face. seems like the obvious little smile was too obvious to go unnoticed, I could feel people staring. but who cares, I have a cute boyfriend to see at 7pm.

it’s been over 2 years since we started this tradition, a bit more than 2 years since we started dating, not to mention the painful 1 year of secretly pining over each other in the name of being friends. yet I’m always excited when it’s date day.

oh no, we don’t have any special story behind how we met though, isn’t it important how special our love is instead?

we just met at vernon’s party 4 years ago. yes, nothing special. we just randomly danced together and seemed to find each other interesting and became friends.

man, little did I know that night, that he would be the love of my life.

alright, let’s put the thoughts away for a while.

tiger baby <3 : it’s 6:59 and I’m at your doorstep tiger baby <3 : open the door exactly in tiger baby <3 : 6 tiger baby <3 : 5 tiger baby <3 : 4 tiger baby <3 : 3 y/n : hi love tiger baby <3 : 2 y/n : oh tiger baby <3 : I see you luv y/n : I see you too luv

standing there, my boyfriend, my love, kwon soonyoung, handed me flowers. now that’s a surprise. he rarely buys me flowers. but these are so pretty! I love it!!

“right on time love.” he smiled brightly.

I received the flowers and returned his bright smile. “baby, thank you, I love them.”

knowing what more he needed than those words, I pulled him into a hug and gave him a small kiss on his ear.

we left for our date.

it’s usually not very grand. we just walk along the long road that leads to the beach since my house is pretty close to it.

strolling through, we also have a lot of snacks while we’re headed towards the beach and light dinner on our way back.

there’s nothing much to it but doing this, even if it’s repeated and could be boring if done alone or with someone else, since it’s with him, it feels like a new experience every time. even if it’s once every month, and it’s like the 19th time we’re doing this together, still feels new.

“so, how was your day?” he asked.

I started ranting about my whole day and then it was my turn to listen to him rant. and once we were done with that, we had some light talks about random topics or about our friends or our future while eating those snacks.

but once we reach the beach, we switch our silent modes on.

literally, on our phones yes, but also our mouths. we don’t talk there for half an hour, it’s just us, laying down on the sand, listening to our beach playlist and the waves, and looking at the sky.

we’ve done this so many times but I don’t think I’ve asked him what he thinks about during that half an hour. I spend the whole 30 minutes thinking about how pretty he is and how much I love him and how grateful I am to have this wonderful person in my life, as the love of my life.

by the end of the 30 minutes, we both get sleepy so we leave for dinner.

then we go on a long walk to ease the digestion.

once back at home, we get ready to sleep.

we can’t afford to stay up late when we’re both working adults. having an evening off every week is fairytale-like enough for our economy.

snuggling into the sheets he wrapped his arms around me, “good night love.” he whispered in my ear and hugged me tighter.

“it would be a goodnight if I could breathe babe.” I joked, making him loosen his grip a bit.

it wasn’t even a few minutes after that I already find him asleep.

the way his eyes were closed and his hair had fallen towards his sides as he laid down next to me, the way his breath was also a nice sound for me, oh how hopelessly in love I was with him. I smiled and whispered into his ears,

Unlocking his door, Changbin entered his home, tiredly, with wet hair and clothes, a bag and a few papers which seemed to be his mail. A full working day with a busy schedule, one must be relieved to get back home, but not Changbin. It rained when he was almost home so it’s not like he can just lay down and rest with wet hair.

He put the mails on the table and the bag at its spot and went to take a warm shower.

Drying his hair, he went up to the kitchen to make some warm lavender tea to drink while he read.

Once he was done with reading and the tea, he finally extended his bulky arm and reached for his mail. There were, of course, unwanted mails too, but the second one seemed to be from someone unexpected, someone special, yet not, for the expression on Changbin's face was mixed. He seemed shocked, yet melancholic. Relieved, yet tensed. Comforted, yet scared.

Almost chickening out, Changbin put away the mail. But he's Changbin. He could never sleep after having an unsolved problem. He got the mail back and opened it, it was sent by his ex. Straightening his posture, stiffening his facial expressions, he read it.

I know I’m not supposed to be writing to you after what happened… but I couldn’t help it. I hope you read this till the end though. I don’t know where to start… should I start from the first time we met? From when we actually became acquaintances? When we became friends? That time when we discovered that just like some cheesy k-drama, we also have a destiny like story? Or from our painful break up? I seriously don’t know what I am supposed to do now that I have lost the most important person to me. I still love you and I know that you know that, but I just wanted to let you know once again. What is love? I used to ask myself. You gave me an answer. Thanks to you I understood what love was and I was finally able to give some of that to myself too. You embraced me and accepted me for who I am. You loved me despite me being that fragile kid who just wore a smile and acted unaffected. You helped me turn over a new leaf. If I am in this chapter of my book today, it’s all because of you filling out the previous chapters. I really love you for being such an important person in my life. I still love you and I don’t want to let go already… but I guess that’s it for us? Ever since you got your new job it’s been hard on both of us… slowly we became distant. After a point, you didn’t have the time and energy for me. I don’t blame you because you finally got to do the work that you have dreamt of doing all your life. All your efforts had finally paid off. I didn’t want to be that boyfriend who held his boyfriend back, and stop him from living the life he had looked forward to for all his life. I know I must have made many mistakes too and I apologise, love. I know things can’t go back to the way it was before. But just keep in mind that I’m only a couple streets away and that I’m always up for a drink. I still love you and I want to be there for you whenever you need a shoulder to lean on, whenever you need an embrace to hug you. We started off cute and were so lovey-dovey and then the hurdles started showing themselves, we were able to get through quite a few but then came the worst. We weren’t able to cross the ocean of monsters. But that’s alright, right Binnie? We did our best and we’ll always remember us. I still love you but unfortunately, although we have such a romantic destiny-like set up, we failed to stay together. I guess we are that one out of thousand k-dramas that have a sad ending. It’s alright I keep saying, but am I alright? No, not at all. You not being by my side makes me feel so empty. It feels like I’m all alone in this world. I feel like I can never be loved. I feel like my eyes have been plucked out for I can no longer see the beauty of life. I feel like I have lost my goal, I have lost my life. I have lost the love of my life. All I wanted to do for you is stay by your side and listen to you ramble on about your day and then cuddle with you to sleep. If that’s a lot to ask for, then I’m sorry for being greedy. All that I have left to say is that, I hope things don’t get awkward. I understand if you want to take a break from seeing me, like not that it’s necessary since we barely saw each other even when we were in a relationship, I understand. I’ll not bother you from now on. You can contact me when you’re ready to see me, when you need me, whatever it is. I will wait for you to talk to me, I won’t bother you until then. If you read so far, which I am kinda sure you did because I know you, thank you for reading. - yours and yours only, felix <3

4 years ago

They dated well for a few months and then Jihoon got accepted into the university where the music course he had been dying to study was allotted for him, he wanted to go there ever since he started making music. Seokmin got accepted into a local university which he wanted to and he studied English. He even secured a part-time job that paid well, he wrote a couple of books that became unexpectedly pretty popular. Jihoon studied and made music. The long-distance was killing both of them but they managed to stay together.

After 4 years of being separated, Jihoon finally got a proper month-long leave and he was coming back to Seokmin. Seokmin had been doing something for Jihoon, he wanted to surprise him so he wrapped up quickly and started the business.

Because of the concept of the store, it was pretty popular among students and people with 9-5 jobs.

Today, the day his boyfriend returns, he closed the store. Just like those whole restaurant reservations that rich main leads do in K-dramas, he wanted the store for himself and his love only. He wanted to show Jihoon what he had done for his boyfriend while he was away, he wanted to tell him how he got this whole business idea because of him, he wanted to tell him everything.

Fixing his hair, Seokmin paced through the dense crowd as soon as he entered the airport to the watch shop Jihoon mentioned he would wait next to. The moment the shop lined with his vision, he paused. He stopped there, scanning the entire place to find his boyfriend. Looking at the tiny figure of his boyfriend who was checking out watches. Not moving a finger of his, remaining at the place where he stood, he admired Jihoon for a couple of minutes. His mind was blank, thinking about nothing but how cute Jihoon looked in his grey hoodie and faded black jeans, the way he opened his eyes wider when he saw each watch, the way he bopped his head to the music playing in his ear pods, just everything about him.

He could swear his mind was about to burst because of the bazillions of thoughts he had when he was on his way and till just before he spotted his partner at the watch shop. It was all kicked out of his head by the cuteness of his favourite cat.

He then snapped out of it and walked towards the shop. Jihoon spotted his love approaching him and he exited the shop. The moment Seokmin realised that Jihoon had noticed him, he ran towards his boyfriend and hugged him. The smile he couldn’t hide was perhaps contagious, for Jihoon had started smiling too and hugged the younger one back.

“Straight home or do you want to stop by somewhere?” Seokmin asked Jihoon still having him in his embrace.

Jihoon replied, “Home. I want to cuddle with you and sleep for a while.”

“Your wish is my command.” Seokmin said as he broke the hug and saluted. Jihoon laughed and handed some of his luggage to Seokmin.  

Walking through the bustling streets, Jihoon told Seokmin all about how this elderly woman next to him on the plane kept talking about her granddaughter’s wedding which she was going to attend in a couple of days. She had gone away for a surgery, she accepted to get the medical process done only because it meant she could happily enjoy her granddaughter’s wedding with her, even though there was a risk of losing her life and not even being able to be a part of the family’s celebrations. He told the sharp-nosed dude how this heart-warming story inspired him to write a warm song.

Just before they turned right, Seokmin grabbed his boyfriend’s arm and stopped him. “I’m going to blindfold you.” He said as Jihoon smirked, “Right here?” To which the younger one blushed and said, “No. I just have a surprise for you. Now let me tie the blindfold.”

They walked a few more steps and when they were right in front of Seokmin’s store, he instructed Jihoon to remove his blindfold and so he did.

HOONIE’S MAGIC SHOP

Looking at the banner on top, Jihoon was super confused. He was at a loss for words.

He had so many thoughts at that moment. ‘Am I dreaming? Is this for real? Is that Hoonie as in Jihoon? Is this Minnie’s shop? What is going on here? Am I still asleep?’

Seokmin, his right hand on the nape of his neck and his left hand slightly pushing his love towards the entrance of the store, instructed him to go inside.

Jihoon was once again speechless.

The store looked exactly like what he had mentioned to Seokmin while sleep talking. The place looked exactly how he described his wannabe-hideout. He couldn’t believe that Seokmin still remembered that and did all this for him.

A big hall with the perfect temperature and scented candles every other corner, a small fireplace, a couple of beanbags around, soothing lofi music playing in the background, a counter where you could borrow headphones, a row of cubicles inside which you can request to be customized according to your comfort. The lights not too bright, not too dim. The music not too loud, not too quiet, the scent not too strong not too weak, everything just perfect to calm people down. There was even one cubicle which was soundproof for people to bring in their pets if they wished to. A beverage stall too, for anyone who wanted hot tea or hot cocoa or any other drink for that matter. All you had to do was get an appointment beforehand. It wasn’t even that expensive considering the effect that place has on you.

Jihoon was overwhelmed. He just sat down on one of the beanbags and pulled Seokmin on top of him. Seokmin was flustered. Jihoon smiled and pecked Seokmin’s nose. He said, “I can’t believe you did all this.” To which Seokmin replied, “Anything for you love.” He eskimo kissed his boyfriend and got off him.

“I wanted to stay like that for a bit more.” Jihoon pouted.

Seokmin walked towards the headphones counter to plug his phone in and he played some of Jihoon’s songs from the playlist that he requested Jeonghan to make for him and brought back a gift-wrapped box that was about the size of an average pencil case.

Seokmin tossed the gift to Jihoon and pulled the other beanbag closer and sat next to him. Jihoon opened the navy-blue gift wrapper and found a box with a pendant, he noticed that it was the exact same design that Seokmin was wearing. He handed it to his boyfriend to let him put it on him and that wasn’t the only gift. There was a letter.

Hoonie!! I miss you so much. I can’t wait to see you again. You have been such a great boyfriend the past few years. Though you were extremely busy, you always made time for me. I am really grateful to have you in my life. The fact that we are apart breaks my heart but one smile from you during our video chats makes my day and I forget all pain. You have been nothing but nice to me when I may be lacking. You are the best thing that ever happened to me and so I want to be my best self for you. Because of our damned society and how people are so narrow minded, we haven’t been able to come out except to our best friends. It does feel frustrating at times, yes. But what matters most is how safe and comfortable you feel so it’s alright. I know you’re sorry about that but I’m telling you that you don’t have to be. Let the idiots think whatever they want to, we can come out about us only when you feel like it, alright baby? You have always made me feel loved, you never abandoned me during my tougher times, you were always there for me. You on the other hand are kind of reserved and you don’t open up much, it does upset me a bit but then I understand that you’re doing your best by telling me whatever you can. I want to be your safe place where you can rest without any disturbances. I want to be that person who makes you feel better, I want to be that person with whom you feel safe, I want to be that person with whom you have nothing to hide, I want to be that person in front of whom you don’t mind being vulnerable. In your stressful world, where you are always busy, I want to be your escape, your stress relief zone, I want to be your comfort person, I want to be anything that soothes you and makes you be yourself. I want to give you all of my love just like you give me your all. Forgive me for any mistakes that I might have made. When you come back for good, can we live together and have those mundane lives where we’re just lovey dovey and there’s no stress? Are you willing? Because… I do. I do is all you have to say. - love, your Minnie <3

The older one was in tears, he put away the letter so that it doesn’t get stained. He rolled over and fell on Seokmin and they rolled over again to hit the floor. Seokmin embraced Jihoon. Jihoon couldn’t stop crying which made his boyfriend cry too.

They cried for a fair amount of time and then Jihoon spoke. “You are the best.” That’s all he could say, with the heavy breathing because of all the crying. Seokmin’s grip tightened and Jihoon buried his face into the younger’s firm chest.

“About the letter…” he spoke again after catching his breath after wiping his tears. “I would love to live with you, in fact I have been thinking about it for quite a while now. And who told you that you have to become any of those only hereafter? You already are, love. You already are my safe place, comfort person and someone in front of whom I can be vulnerable. You haven’t made any mistakes for me to forgive you.” He paused for a couple of seconds to peck Seokmin’s cheek and then continued. “You are my everything, thank you for understanding that it’s hard for me to open up. I know you get frustrated at times because of that but you still understand and for that I really really… I love you.”

Seokmin’s eyes widened. He heard the L word from his boyfriend for the first time. He was ecstatic. He lowered himself to get his face aligned in order with Jihoon’s and kissed him. The older one kissed him back just as passionately as the younger one had.