Broken Linc

Couldn't we just be training passengers? Places to be, TTC. Places to be.

Now I can pick up ANYTHING? Marvellous! Alaska, prepare to be relocated to the Caspian Sea; you're welcome.

"What was his name again...Lincoln...Clinton...one o' them presidential fellas anywho."

Do not touch or red-hatted nag birds will be deployed.

What the hell is "gluten friendly"? Sounds like there would be MORE gluten welcome in this dessert.

A typo? Or maybe the writer is lactose intolerant and that's what they call it.

I think my brain just went into shock.

"Includes everything but the girl"? So, how much extra for the "Suit, Shirt, Tie & Girl" package? Does it cost extra to get a girl who can smile in a picture? Also, it should be "this year's", not "this years"...maybe grammatical errors were in fashion when the guy's hair was.

Guessing the "live" part happens before the "halves" part. Either that or science is up to something.

Ah, so THIS is why the Leafs didn't make the playoffs. Maybe next year, less of the donuts and more of the not losing.

"Why do the kids keep CRYING? Don't they LIKE the Easter Bunny? Sure, there's likely some twitchy meth head in there who's four hours late on his five o'clock shadow and is only doing the gig to hide from his parole officer. But when the little kids look up, all THEY see is a gargantuan furry glassy-eyed permasmiling abomination who would as soon give you chocolate eggs as decapitate you with his giant flat guillotine teeth...never mind; I get it now."