formally known as attentionplease 2010-2023 offical queen of smuttiesmut * No GenAI here * writing since 2010 * drawing since 90s Masterlist of masterlists
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AN: Well, there's Rick and we arrived at Season 1 Ladies and Gentlemen.
Chapter 8 - strangers
2198 words
Just keep going. Put one foot in front of the other. Keep going up the mountain. Follow the road. Ignore the pain. I repeat these phrases like a mantra. Iâm so fucking tired. Why the hell didnât I listen to Jen? No one could have guessed that she was right for once. She was so fucking right. I should have looked for a place to live far away, a cabin in the woods. Somewhere far away from this shit. I could have barricaded myself in, I wouldnât have bloody feet, I wouldnât be so exhausted. I was a breath away from becoming one of those undead creatures. I didnât even have time to pack the most important things. I stole diapers and other stuff at high risk. I look down at the little bundle I have tied safely to my chest. Was Penny right, and was it a mistake?
Tears well up in my eyes. No, never. I shake my head and gently stroke Charlieâs back. She sighs softly and snuggles closer to me. I would give anything just for this warm feeling. Sure, itâs not easy, especially now that I have to make sure we survive. But I have a pretty carefree baby. She hardly ever cries, only when sheâs scared or extremely hungry. But even then, sheâs easy to calm down. She sleeps a lot and doesnât notice any of this shit yet. Thank God. I envy her for that. That she can sleep so peacefully, that she doesnât have to be afraid. Once again, I wonder what it would have been like if I had listened to Jen. A small cabin on the edge of the forest, with supplies, waiting for it all to be over. But will it ever be over? How many supplies could I have collected? Without a car, I wouldnât have been able to move anyway. I had no choice but to walk to the nearest refugee camp with what I could carry. Shortly after the first cases became known in the US, people panicked. Chaos broke out in the stores, looting started. It was pure anarchy. I was lucky to get my hands on just enough of the bare necessities that I am still living on now.
Somehow, I even managed to get my hands on some pretty good equipment: a sharp knife and even a gun. Even though Iâve never used one before, it makes me feel safer. Fortunately, I havenât had to use it yet. Overall, Iâve been very lucky, but people around me have been dying like flies. At some point, I stopped counting. Many of them were bitten, while others killed each other because they wanted supplies and panicked, or out of sheer malice. The situation became more unbearable every day, so I had to decide to leave the refugee camp for Charlieâs safety. Because, in all honesty, it was becoming more dangerous in there than outside. The mood grew more and more aggressive, and I could hardly trust anyone. One of the people who was friendly towards me explained to me what was important when you had to kill the undead. That you had to hit them in the brain. He gave me the knife, and I couldnât have known at the time that it would save my life shortly afterwards. At night, I could always hide in a car or in a run-down apartment. I was actually only attacked by an undead once, yesterday morning, and I was even able to successfully fight it off and kill it with a stab to the head. I just woke up and got out of the car to stretch my legs. I wasnât paying attention to my surroundings, and then the walker was already standing in front of me. Luckily, Charlie was still in the car, because the bastard was so close to me that she would have definitely been injured.
My heart is still racing when I think about it. I am so grateful for the little training I received at the camp. After the walker collapsed, I couldnât move at first. I stared at the corpse, frozen in place. And at that moment, Jensâ words came back to me: »Go where there are as few people as possible.« Exactly, because if there are no people, there are no undead.
The only way forward for me was to the lake. And now Iâm on my way there. Up the mountain. In the past, there were always only a few hikers there. We should be safe there, at least for a while. Itâs been forever since Iâve been here. I used to come here often, by car. When I needed a break, sometimes even with Penny. We often stayed there overnight. Ah yes, Penny. Sometimes I wonder if she survived too. Or Daryl. My stomach cramps painfully, and I pause for a moment. If theyâre lucky, they were so high that they didnât even notice their end. I would wish that for them, for Godâs sake, not that they are dead. But at least they didnât have to suffer. No one deserves that. Iâve seen the walkers sink their teeth in, heard people scream in pain and despair. Blood everywhere â what is that? I stop and turn toward the downhill direction where the sound is coming from. Is that an alarm siren? I listen, my mind telling me itâs impossible. But still, the noise grows louder with every second and mixes with the loud hum of engines. Fuck. I have to get off the road. With a few quick steps, I reach the edge of the forest and take cover behind the greenery as best I can. I really donât need a few more nuts out there.
A red sports car speeds past me, the draft hitting me with a delay. The car alarm is so high-pitched that it hurts my ears. What the hell? Does this idiot want to attract the walkers here? Damn asshole. Thatâs the only plan I have. There is no plan B. The lake was already plan B, for fuckâs sake. Iâm about to step back onto the road when I hear another engine rumbling. Great, just what I need, more of the same. At least this time thereâs no howling. And itâs not going so fast. Luckily, Iâve stayed at the edge of the forest, but Iâm no longer hidden behind the bushes. I hold my hand over Charlie to protect her. Itâs not a car, more like a small truck, as far as I can tell. As they get closer, I take a few steps back. Shit, did they see me? Theyâre slowing down. Not good. Not good at all. I stumble as I continue to back away because I donât dare look away. Brakes squeal, theyâve seen me. Shit. The last thing I needed. Iâm about to start running into the woods when the loading ramp opens and a blonde woman gets out. »Hey, lady. Everything okay?« she calls from a safe distance, putting her hands in her pants pockets. She looks in the rearview mirror to talk to one of the men. The passenger door opens and a man gets out. I keep backing away, this time being careful not to trip over any branches. Iâve seen what happened to some of the women in the refugee camp, and I donât want to experience that under any circumstances. Itâs too late to run away, and Iâm not conditioned enough to keep it up for long. There is only one option. With a trembling hand and a last glance at Charlie, I grab the gun and point it at the two of them.
»Stay away from me!« I shout, surprised to find that they actually stop.
»We just want to help,« the man finally says, raising his hands in a calm gesture.
»Hey Rick. You used to be a cop, you said? We could use your help,« the man calls over his shoulder into the truck, and another man in uniform gets out. Iâm not sure if theyâre trying to calm me down or motivate me to run away.
»Go away! Leave me alone! Just drive on, please.« Damn, Iâm too loud. The walkers. They might hear me. Although. Haha. That damn sports car already did that. I look behind me. The forest is dark, itâs dangerous. I donât want to go there. Damn it, I just want to go to the lake. In peace. Alone.
I flinch in fright when a soft whimper comes from the blanket. Shit.
»Not now, Charlie⊠be quietâŠÂ« I whisper as quietly as possible and try to rock the child somehow with my free hand. »You⊠you have a baby? Damn, how did you survive out here?« asks the other man, causing me to look up. I was so focused on calming her down that I didnât notice this Rick slowly approaching me. I stare at three shocked faces and raise the gun back up to Rickâs face. »Shit. Back off or Iâll shoot you!« My fingers hurt from gripping the gun so tightly. If I really had to shoot, Iâd probably hit anything but the threat in front of me.
»Maâam⊠calm down⊠put the gun away⊠We wonât hurt you or the baby,« Rick tries to calm me down, but it doesnât have the effect he wants.
»Go away⊠please.« I whimper as Charlieâs crying gets louder. I have to calm her down, otherwise her loud crying will attract a lot of undead.
»Please!« Iâm almost screaming through my tears, because the gun is now almost touching Rickâs chest, heâs come so close. Why the hell donât I just shoot?
»Maâam, you really should calm down. I donât know what youâve been through, but weâre not a threat,« he explains again, but I just shake my head, crying.
Charlieâs crying is now unbearable, every muscle in my body painfully tense. Why is he doing that? He looks at me, raises his hands, and takes a few steps back. »We have⊠a camp at the top of the hill, right by the lake⊠Itâs safe there⊠There are children there tooâŠÂ« explains the blonde woman, causing me to snort. Sure, of course there are sweets in the white van. »Here, take a lookâŠÂ« the other man mumbles, reaching into his back pocket. I flinch, but he only takes out his wallet. He opens it and approaches me after giving Rick a critical look. I squint to see whatâs inside.
»My wife and children⊠theyâre safe up there, and you can be too,« he explains. How many lies have I heard in the last few weeks? How many people have I seen die because they believed them?
»Please put the gun away,« Rick calmly demands a moment later. Damn, I donât know what to do. Three people talking at me, the crying baby in my arms, the gun in my hand, Iâm so hungry. It all comes crashing down on me like an earthquake, and I start crying like a stuck pig. And I lose my focus. When Rick takes the gun from my hand with a practiced move, I turn away in reflex and run as fast as my legs can carry me.
»We have to follow her, she wonât survive long like this!«
»Shit,« Rick curses, pockets my gun, and runs after me. Itâs not hard for him to follow me, because first of all, he only has to follow my babyâs crying, and second, Iâm pretty fast out of breath and lean against one of the trees, gasping for air.
»Please⊠I have nothing to give youâŠÂ« I whimper, holding both hands in front of my baby to protect it.
»We donât want anything from you. We want to help you,« Rickâs voice is gentle and soothing, but I still canât stop sobbing. He approaches me with a smile. What is he doing? Is he stupid? He actually holds out my gun to me. I quickly grab it before he changes his mind.
»Next time you want to threaten someone, you should unlock it.« Haha, thanks for the tip.
»If it makes you feel any better, I only met these people today. They saved me in the city, why would they do anything to you now? I get your concerns, but trust me, theyâre okay.« He keeps glancing at Charlie, whose crying has now turned into exhausted whimpering.
»Come on, check out the camp, and if you donât like it, you can leave anytime, okay? I promise.« I hate this. This feeling that no matter what decision I make, itâs going to be wrong.
»Shh⊠itâs okay, my little sweetheart.« Damn, where is that stupid thing? I search through the fabric; the stupid pacifier has to be somewhere. I attached it to her onesie with a chain so I wouldnât lose it a thousand times.
»I-I wanted to go to the lake anywayâŠÂ« Thank God, she takes the pacifier and only sobs now and then. Her little hand clings to my shirt, I pull her closer to me and kiss her on the head.
»Iâm sorry that Mama scared you so muchâŠÂ« I straighten the cloth and turn back to Rick.
»You really should come with us. You donât stand a chance with the baby on your own.« For another moment, my mind goes blank. I know heâs right, but I donât want to see it. What are my chances of survival, and especially Charlieâs, if I go on alone? Not very high, and that thought hurts. Are they really better with these people? Once again, I have no choice. The lake was the only option.
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Smutty One Shot "The winner takes it all" ( BBC Sherlock x Reader ) 18+
-> masterlist <-
Sherlock an alcohol, always an interesting combination. But sometimes it can hurt like hell
warnings: alcohol
1114 words
Sherlock and his experiments are always somewhat questionable. Normally, I am on the sidelines, enjoying the stories of others to a greater or lesser extent. I never thought I would be part of an experiment myself. Or that I would voluntarily agree to participate. But I couldnât resist. Who could have? Letâs be honest. When someone like Sherlock is desperate to prove that alcohol has no effect on his mind, itâs practically a law to prove him wrong. And I succeeded in doing just that.
The experiment was a complete success. Sherlock proved in every way that even he, with enough alcohol, does things he wouldnât normally do. Moaning, I cling to his curls and close my eyes as he pushes his long fingers into me again.
And yet the evening had begun so innocently.
I had assumed that at most I would make fun of him stumbling around and not bring out his talent for giving me the kind of orgasm that no one else had ever given me before. Several times. I already know that I will regret this tomorrow. I know that itâs not right. Oh God, those lips. Itâs as if he knows exactly where to touch me to make me melt like warm wax. There isnât an inch of my body that he hasnât explored. Fuck, Iâll never be able to look him in the face again, or heâll just ignore me and never speak to me again. I warned him. I told him to take it slow. Even after the fourth tequila, when he was already having trouble speaking and I wanted to stop because I was worried, he refused and insisted on continuing the experiment. After shot number seven, I knew it was a mistake. He stumbled towards me with a look I never would have expected from him. He never gave any hints.
And then? Bang, he holds my head in both hands and his lips are on mine. Not that it bothers me per se. I just never expected it. Not from him. From anyone else, but not Sherlock.
Itâs always been hard enough, but at least I could always tell myself that he wasnât interested in me. That made it bearable, I knew it would never be more than it was. Iâm also pretty sure that apart from the physical, thereâs nothing else going on in that direction. He has no interest in relationships, the most heâll go for is friendship, and thatâs difficult enough.
Why am I doing this? I shudder as another wave of tingling rushes through my body. I know exactly why: Iâve had enough shots to be unable to think straight. With the fatal addition that my emotions are taking over. And God, this feeling of being desired by this man. How often have I imagined what it would be like when he touches me, if he desires me? And it feels so much better than anything I could ever have imagined. Trapped under his touch, tasting his kisses, this warmth that flows through every fibre of my body.
I push away the thought that we donât suit each other. No, not now. I can think about that later. Why canât this evening last forever? Make time stand still, and all that. Tonight, everything is perfect. Tonight, he is mine. Thatâs all that matters right now. I curse under my breath and suppress a moan, instead channelling this overwhelming feeling into my hands, which dig into his upper arm. I have no idea if my nails are piercing his skin, I donât care. All I can feel is him slowly pushing into me, his breath on my chest, until he is finally deep inside me and pauses for a moment.
«You should stop him.» Shut up.
«Itâs wrong.» But I want it so much. I want to feel him, I want to taste him. I want to claw into his back while he moans my name quietly. Oh God, I never expected him to moan at all. He leans his head on my shoulder, finding his rhythm, itâs perfect. I wrap my arms around his chest. Itâs so perfect the way he fills me. So perfect that all my doubts are washed away. Itâs okay. To pretend that I mean something to him. To believe that the struggle was worth it, the struggle for his attention, for his love.
«Liar.» It doesnât matter. Iâm playing his game. I donât give a shit. With every thrust, with every kiss, I lose myself more in the idea that this will never end and is the beginning of something new. With his rhythm, he drives my body into a kind of trance, into a world where we belong together, where I am happy with him. A world where he doesnât just see me as a friend. Where he truly wants me, without alcohol. Where I can fall asleep next to him every night. Fuck the truth. Nobody wants to see it anyway. I donât want this emptiness anymore. I want to enjoy every second that brings me closer to paradise. Fuck it, Iâll never feel him like this again. God, this tingling sensation is driving me crazy. What is it? I donât know this feeling that takes over my whole body. His thrusts are getting harder, my mind is now lying whimpering in the corner. Who cares. Sherlock lifts his head, I lose myself in his blue eyes. His lips find mine. An electric shock runs through me as our tongues touch. My moans are lost in his mouth as he thrusts even harder. Trapped under his body, held tight in his grip. For a fraction of a second, everything goes numb, only to burst into a thousand little explosions, like a chain reaction, each one reinforcing the next, followed by the grand finale as he empties himself into me with one last hard thrust. His kiss is so passionate and full of longing. A kiss I will never experience again.
I gasp for air, his forehead resting on mine. He is also out of breath. For this little moment, everything is perfect, I feel like Iâm flying. Yet I make the mistake of opening my eyes. His gaze brings me back to reality faster than I would like. I can see it clearly and it hurts. The proof of everything I already knew. He will never desire me, never see me as more than a friend.
Smutty One Shot "The winner takes it all" ( BBC Sherlock x Reader ) 18+
-> masterlist <-
Sherlock an alcohol, always an interesting combination. But sometimes it can hurt like hell
warnings: alcohol
1114 words
Sherlock and his experiments are always somewhat questionable. Normally, I am on the sidelines, enjoying the stories of others to a greater or lesser extent. I never thought I would be part of an experiment myself. Or that I would voluntarily agree to participate. But I couldnât resist. Who could have? Letâs be honest. When someone like Sherlock is desperate to prove that alcohol has no effect on his mind, itâs practically a law to prove him wrong. And I succeeded in doing just that.
The experiment was a complete success. Sherlock proved in every way that even he, with enough alcohol, does things he wouldnât normally do. Moaning, I cling to his curls and close my eyes as he pushes his long fingers into me again.
And yet the evening had begun so innocently.
I had assumed that at most I would make fun of him stumbling around and not bring out his talent for giving me the kind of orgasm that no one else had ever given me before. Several times. I already know that I will regret this tomorrow. I know that itâs not right. Oh God, those lips. Itâs as if he knows exactly where to touch me to make me melt like warm wax. There isnât an inch of my body that he hasnât explored. Fuck, Iâll never be able to look him in the face again, or heâll just ignore me and never speak to me again. I warned him. I told him to take it slow. Even after the fourth tequila, when he was already having trouble speaking and I wanted to stop because I was worried, he refused and insisted on continuing the experiment. After shot number seven, I knew it was a mistake. He stumbled towards me with a look I never would have expected from him. He never gave any hints.
And then? Bang, he holds my head in both hands and his lips are on mine. Not that it bothers me per se. I just never expected it. Not from him. From anyone else, but not Sherlock.
Itâs always been hard enough, but at least I could always tell myself that he wasnât interested in me. That made it bearable, I knew it would never be more than it was. Iâm also pretty sure that apart from the physical, thereâs nothing else going on in that direction. He has no interest in relationships, the most heâll go for is friendship, and thatâs difficult enough.
Why am I doing this? I shudder as another wave of tingling rushes through my body. I know exactly why: Iâve had enough shots to be unable to think straight. With the fatal addition that my emotions are taking over. And God, this feeling of being desired by this man. How often have I imagined what it would be like when he touches me, if he desires me? And it feels so much better than anything I could ever have imagined. Trapped under his touch, tasting his kisses, this warmth that flows through every fibre of my body.
I push away the thought that we donât suit each other. No, not now. I can think about that later. Why canât this evening last forever? Make time stand still, and all that. Tonight, everything is perfect. Tonight, he is mine. Thatâs all that matters right now. I curse under my breath and suppress a moan, instead channelling this overwhelming feeling into my hands, which dig into his upper arm. I have no idea if my nails are piercing his skin, I donât care. All I can feel is him slowly pushing into me, his breath on my chest, until he is finally deep inside me and pauses for a moment.
«You should stop him.» Shut up.
«Itâs wrong.» But I want it so much. I want to feel him, I want to taste him. I want to claw into his back while he moans my name quietly. Oh God, I never expected him to moan at all. He leans his head on my shoulder, finding his rhythm, itâs perfect. I wrap my arms around his chest. Itâs so perfect the way he fills me. So perfect that all my doubts are washed away. Itâs okay. To pretend that I mean something to him. To believe that the struggle was worth it, the struggle for his attention, for his love.
«Liar.» It doesnât matter. Iâm playing his game. I donât give a shit. With every thrust, with every kiss, I lose myself more in the idea that this will never end and is the beginning of something new. With his rhythm, he drives my body into a kind of trance, into a world where we belong together, where I am happy with him. A world where he doesnât just see me as a friend. Where he truly wants me, without alcohol. Where I can fall asleep next to him every night. Fuck the truth. Nobody wants to see it anyway. I donât want this emptiness anymore. I want to enjoy every second that brings me closer to paradise. Fuck it, Iâll never feel him like this again. God, this tingling sensation is driving me crazy. What is it? I donât know this feeling that takes over my whole body. His thrusts are getting harder, my mind is now lying whimpering in the corner. Who cares. Sherlock lifts his head, I lose myself in his blue eyes. His lips find mine. An electric shock runs through me as our tongues touch. My moans are lost in his mouth as he thrusts even harder. Trapped under his body, held tight in his grip. For a fraction of a second, everything goes numb, only to burst into a thousand little explosions, like a chain reaction, each one reinforcing the next, followed by the grand finale as he empties himself into me with one last hard thrust. His kiss is so passionate and full of longing. A kiss I will never experience again.
I gasp for air, his forehead resting on mine. He is also out of breath. For this little moment, everything is perfect, I feel like Iâm flying. Yet I make the mistake of opening my eyes. His gaze brings me back to reality faster than I would like. I can see it clearly and it hurts. The proof of everything I already knew. He will never desire me, never see me as more than a friend.
CN: toxic friendship, toxic relationsship, abusive behaviour, drug and alcohol abuse, unplanned pregnancy, and the usual stuff from twd, starts before the virus , based on a request, smut in a few chapters
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
â Live Streamingâ Interactive Chatâ Private Showsâ HD Qualityâ Free Actions
Free to watch âą No registration required âą HD streaming
AN: Well, there's Rick and we arrived at Season 1 Ladies and Gentlemen.
Chapter 8 - strangers
2198 words
Just keep going. Put one foot in front of the other. Keep going up the mountain. Follow the road. Ignore the pain. I repeat these phrases like a mantra. Iâm so fucking tired. Why the hell didnât I listen to Jen? No one could have guessed that she was right for once. She was so fucking right. I should have looked for a place to live far away, a cabin in the woods. Somewhere far away from this shit. I could have barricaded myself in, I wouldnât have bloody feet, I wouldnât be so exhausted. I was a breath away from becoming one of those undead creatures. I didnât even have time to pack the most important things. I stole diapers and other stuff at high risk. I look down at the little bundle I have tied safely to my chest. Was Penny right, and was it a mistake?
Tears well up in my eyes. No, never. I shake my head and gently stroke Charlieâs back. She sighs softly and snuggles closer to me. I would give anything just for this warm feeling. Sure, itâs not easy, especially now that I have to make sure we survive. But I have a pretty carefree baby. She hardly ever cries, only when sheâs scared or extremely hungry. But even then, sheâs easy to calm down. She sleeps a lot and doesnât notice any of this shit yet. Thank God. I envy her for that. That she can sleep so peacefully, that she doesnât have to be afraid. Once again, I wonder what it would have been like if I had listened to Jen. A small cabin on the edge of the forest, with supplies, waiting for it all to be over. But will it ever be over? How many supplies could I have collected? Without a car, I wouldnât have been able to move anyway. I had no choice but to walk to the nearest refugee camp with what I could carry. Shortly after the first cases became known in the US, people panicked. Chaos broke out in the stores, looting started. It was pure anarchy. I was lucky to get my hands on just enough of the bare necessities that I am still living on now.
Somehow, I even managed to get my hands on some pretty good equipment: a sharp knife and even a gun. Even though Iâve never used one before, it makes me feel safer. Fortunately, I havenât had to use it yet. Overall, Iâve been very lucky, but people around me have been dying like flies. At some point, I stopped counting. Many of them were bitten, while others killed each other because they wanted supplies and panicked, or out of sheer malice. The situation became more unbearable every day, so I had to decide to leave the refugee camp for Charlieâs safety. Because, in all honesty, it was becoming more dangerous in there than outside. The mood grew more and more aggressive, and I could hardly trust anyone. One of the people who was friendly towards me explained to me what was important when you had to kill the undead. That you had to hit them in the brain. He gave me the knife, and I couldnât have known at the time that it would save my life shortly afterwards. At night, I could always hide in a car or in a run-down apartment. I was actually only attacked by an undead once, yesterday morning, and I was even able to successfully fight it off and kill it with a stab to the head. I just woke up and got out of the car to stretch my legs. I wasnât paying attention to my surroundings, and then the walker was already standing in front of me. Luckily, Charlie was still in the car, because the bastard was so close to me that she would have definitely been injured.
My heart is still racing when I think about it. I am so grateful for the little training I received at the camp. After the walker collapsed, I couldnât move at first. I stared at the corpse, frozen in place. And at that moment, Jensâ words came back to me: »Go where there are as few people as possible.« Exactly, because if there are no people, there are no undead.
The only way forward for me was to the lake. And now Iâm on my way there. Up the mountain. In the past, there were always only a few hikers there. We should be safe there, at least for a while. Itâs been forever since Iâve been here. I used to come here often, by car. When I needed a break, sometimes even with Penny. We often stayed there overnight. Ah yes, Penny. Sometimes I wonder if she survived too. Or Daryl. My stomach cramps painfully, and I pause for a moment. If theyâre lucky, they were so high that they didnât even notice their end. I would wish that for them, for Godâs sake, not that they are dead. But at least they didnât have to suffer. No one deserves that. Iâve seen the walkers sink their teeth in, heard people scream in pain and despair. Blood everywhere â what is that? I stop and turn toward the downhill direction where the sound is coming from. Is that an alarm siren? I listen, my mind telling me itâs impossible. But still, the noise grows louder with every second and mixes with the loud hum of engines. Fuck. I have to get off the road. With a few quick steps, I reach the edge of the forest and take cover behind the greenery as best I can. I really donât need a few more nuts out there.
A red sports car speeds past me, the draft hitting me with a delay. The car alarm is so high-pitched that it hurts my ears. What the hell? Does this idiot want to attract the walkers here? Damn asshole. Thatâs the only plan I have. There is no plan B. The lake was already plan B, for fuckâs sake. Iâm about to step back onto the road when I hear another engine rumbling. Great, just what I need, more of the same. At least this time thereâs no howling. And itâs not going so fast. Luckily, Iâve stayed at the edge of the forest, but Iâm no longer hidden behind the bushes. I hold my hand over Charlie to protect her. Itâs not a car, more like a small truck, as far as I can tell. As they get closer, I take a few steps back. Shit, did they see me? Theyâre slowing down. Not good. Not good at all. I stumble as I continue to back away because I donât dare look away. Brakes squeal, theyâve seen me. Shit. The last thing I needed. Iâm about to start running into the woods when the loading ramp opens and a blonde woman gets out. »Hey, lady. Everything okay?« she calls from a safe distance, putting her hands in her pants pockets. She looks in the rearview mirror to talk to one of the men. The passenger door opens and a man gets out. I keep backing away, this time being careful not to trip over any branches. Iâve seen what happened to some of the women in the refugee camp, and I donât want to experience that under any circumstances. Itâs too late to run away, and Iâm not conditioned enough to keep it up for long. There is only one option. With a trembling hand and a last glance at Charlie, I grab the gun and point it at the two of them.
»Stay away from me!« I shout, surprised to find that they actually stop.
»We just want to help,« the man finally says, raising his hands in a calm gesture.
»Hey Rick. You used to be a cop, you said? We could use your help,« the man calls over his shoulder into the truck, and another man in uniform gets out. Iâm not sure if theyâre trying to calm me down or motivate me to run away.
»Go away! Leave me alone! Just drive on, please.« Damn, Iâm too loud. The walkers. They might hear me. Although. Haha. That damn sports car already did that. I look behind me. The forest is dark, itâs dangerous. I donât want to go there. Damn it, I just want to go to the lake. In peace. Alone.
I flinch in fright when a soft whimper comes from the blanket. Shit.
»Not now, Charlie⊠be quietâŠÂ« I whisper as quietly as possible and try to rock the child somehow with my free hand. »You⊠you have a baby? Damn, how did you survive out here?« asks the other man, causing me to look up. I was so focused on calming her down that I didnât notice this Rick slowly approaching me. I stare at three shocked faces and raise the gun back up to Rickâs face. »Shit. Back off or Iâll shoot you!« My fingers hurt from gripping the gun so tightly. If I really had to shoot, Iâd probably hit anything but the threat in front of me.
»Maâam⊠calm down⊠put the gun away⊠We wonât hurt you or the baby,« Rick tries to calm me down, but it doesnât have the effect he wants.
»Go away⊠please.« I whimper as Charlieâs crying gets louder. I have to calm her down, otherwise her loud crying will attract a lot of undead.
»Please!« Iâm almost screaming through my tears, because the gun is now almost touching Rickâs chest, heâs come so close. Why the hell donât I just shoot?
»Maâam, you really should calm down. I donât know what youâve been through, but weâre not a threat,« he explains again, but I just shake my head, crying.
Charlieâs crying is now unbearable, every muscle in my body painfully tense. Why is he doing that? He looks at me, raises his hands, and takes a few steps back. »We have⊠a camp at the top of the hill, right by the lake⊠Itâs safe there⊠There are children there tooâŠÂ« explains the blonde woman, causing me to snort. Sure, of course there are sweets in the white van. »Here, take a lookâŠÂ« the other man mumbles, reaching into his back pocket. I flinch, but he only takes out his wallet. He opens it and approaches me after giving Rick a critical look. I squint to see whatâs inside.
»My wife and children⊠theyâre safe up there, and you can be too,« he explains. How many lies have I heard in the last few weeks? How many people have I seen die because they believed them?
»Please put the gun away,« Rick calmly demands a moment later. Damn, I donât know what to do. Three people talking at me, the crying baby in my arms, the gun in my hand, Iâm so hungry. It all comes crashing down on me like an earthquake, and I start crying like a stuck pig. And I lose my focus. When Rick takes the gun from my hand with a practiced move, I turn away in reflex and run as fast as my legs can carry me.
»We have to follow her, she wonât survive long like this!«
»Shit,« Rick curses, pockets my gun, and runs after me. Itâs not hard for him to follow me, because first of all, he only has to follow my babyâs crying, and second, Iâm pretty fast out of breath and lean against one of the trees, gasping for air.
»Please⊠I have nothing to give youâŠÂ« I whimper, holding both hands in front of my baby to protect it.
»We donât want anything from you. We want to help you,« Rickâs voice is gentle and soothing, but I still canât stop sobbing. He approaches me with a smile. What is he doing? Is he stupid? He actually holds out my gun to me. I quickly grab it before he changes his mind.
»Next time you want to threaten someone, you should unlock it.« Haha, thanks for the tip.
»If it makes you feel any better, I only met these people today. They saved me in the city, why would they do anything to you now? I get your concerns, but trust me, theyâre okay.« He keeps glancing at Charlie, whose crying has now turned into exhausted whimpering.
»Come on, check out the camp, and if you donât like it, you can leave anytime, okay? I promise.« I hate this. This feeling that no matter what decision I make, itâs going to be wrong.
»Shh⊠itâs okay, my little sweetheart.« Damn, where is that stupid thing? I search through the fabric; the stupid pacifier has to be somewhere. I attached it to her onesie with a chain so I wouldnât lose it a thousand times.
»I-I wanted to go to the lake anywayâŠÂ« Thank God, she takes the pacifier and only sobs now and then. Her little hand clings to my shirt, I pull her closer to me and kiss her on the head.
»Iâm sorry that Mama scared you so muchâŠÂ« I straighten the cloth and turn back to Rick.
»You really should come with us. You donât stand a chance with the baby on your own.« For another moment, my mind goes blank. I know heâs right, but I donât want to see it. What are my chances of survival, and especially Charlieâs, if I go on alone? Not very high, and that thought hurts. Are they really better with these people? Once again, I have no choice. The lake was the only option.
AN: Let's say hello to the walkers and annoying Penny. Daryl finds something.
Chapter 7 - Charlene
2070 words
Loneliness
The only feeling that has a firm grip on me and pushes all others into the background. Despite the little miracle growing inside me. Iâm standing in front of the mirror again. I try to pull in my stomach, but the bump can no longer be hidden.
A slight pressure works its way through my stomach from the inside, as if my insides were riding a roller coaster, to the spot where my hand is resting. As if she wanted to show me: âHey, youâre not alone. Have you forgotten me?â Sometimes I wish I could. Sometimes I even manage to. But then the restlessness returns, the questions that torture me night after night. Am I ready for this? Will I even be able to manage this? Was my decision a mistake?
âOuch.â I pull my hand away in reflex. That kick was a lot harder. It makes me sad to know that my daughter will grow up alone with me. A tear runs down my face as I gently stroke my belly.
We donât need them. Neither Penny nor Daryl. At first I was angry, although no, thatâs an understatement. I was furious. But now? That scumbag doesnât deserve me or this baby.
âWe donât need them, my little girl, youâll see. We can do this!â I whisper, trembling as I breathe in. I hope so, so much. But what if Iâm not a good mother? I have to be strong, more than I could ever imagine. That becomes clearer to me with each passing day. I saw Penny not long ago. It was painful. At first, I didnât recognize her. She was totally skin and bones, with dark circles under her eyes. It was just assumptions running through my head. But each one was worse than the last. She has changed so much. At first, I thought about saying something to her. But then I realized that Penny was never the person I thought she was. She took advantage of me so many times, but she hasnât been as mean as she has been since Merle. And me, stupid idiot, actually felt guilty for a moment. As if I were responsible for what she does with her life.
Since then, Iâve thought a lot about talking to Daryl again. But letâs be honest. Why would Merle and Penny take drugs and Daryl just sit there and watch? Heâs definitely just as deep in the shit. My baby doesnât deserve a life like that. And neither do I.
Until two weeks ago, at least work was like family. For a few hours, I wasnât alone. Some of my coworkers even helped me get things like a crib and set it up. Daisy, the receptionist, even took me to the supermarket once a week because my damn car still isnât fixed. Itâs just too expensive, and Iâll definitely need the money when the little one is born. Everything was fine, I felt good. But then came the shock. Iâm not allowed to work anymore. And since then, I havenât heard a word from Daisy and the others. They donât even reply to my text messages. Only a few more weeks, then sheâll finally be here. And then maybe I can go back to work. At least, I hope so.
The shrill ringing of my cell phone makes me jump. Somehow, Iâm glad to be torn away from these thoughts. But when I look at the display and recognize Jennyâs number, who worked with me in the office, my stomach clenches painful. Sheâs not interested in me or the baby. The only thing this woman is concerned about is herself and the gossip she can spread. I was always good for that. No matter what she heard or saw, she always spread it as quickly as possible to everyone she knew. Unfortunately, I belong to that circle. The stories she tells are indeed sometimes amusing, like listening to a fairy tale as a child. But nothing more than that. A smile crosses my lips. I remember well how she told everyone in a panic that the government was planning to smuggle humanoid androids into society, for control purposes, of course. This would all be related to the pigeons that eavesdrop on us every day. I look at the flashing mobile phone. A little distraction certainly wonât hurt me. Maybe I should write down all her stories and become a best-selling author. Shaking my head, I finally accept the call. âHey, Jenââ
âListen, you need to listen to me carefully now!â Okay, wow, not even a hello or anything. She doesnât even let me answer, but talks so fast and so much that my brain canât process it. Does she breathe through her hair or how is that even possible?
âJen! Wait a minute. I didnât understand a word. Slow down, please.â On the one hand, I want to laugh, but on the other hand, thereâs this feeling in my stomach thatâs growing stronger. I donât like it. Not even a little bit.
âYou â have â to â leave. Go to the ââ What kind of shitty connection does she have?
âFew people. Promise me, please.â Damn, what the hell. Somethingâs wrong. She sounds totally frantic.
âJen! Why? Whatâs going on?â My pulse quickens. No, not a good idea. I canât get upset.
âVirusâwaitââ Crackling.
âJen? Hello?â
Fuck. fuck. fuck.
âNow Iâve got everything in the car. I went shopping before everything collapses. Fuck. You know, okay, listen. Give me a second. I need to take a deep breath.â Okay, Iâll wait. But could you please hurry up? My nerves. I hear her taking deep breaths and counting. Is she struggling with a panic attack?
âHoney, listen. Letâs start over. You have to get away. Go to the outskirts of town. Where there are few people.â Why does Dixon immediately come to mind? Fuck it. âThis is going to be the end. The Frenchââ She takes another deep breath. I can literally hear her shaking. âThe French have discovered a virus. Itâs said to be very dangerous and no one knows where it came from or where it is already.â Okay, now I canât help but smile. So, the usual conspiracy theories. âDonât you think we would have heard about it on the news?â
âI donât think Thomas, whose uncle works in one of these labs, is lying to me. He never has.» Oh, right, Thomas. Why didnât I think of that? That makes it more convincing. âI know youâre going to laugh at me. They always laugh at me. But this time itâs real. He showed me videos. Peopleâthey attack othersâand bite them. They want to eat them.â
"Calm down, Jen. People are assholes and attack each other⊠even with unconventional methods. Mike Tyson has bitten other people too.â
âNo, Iâm not going to calm down. They were dead! Do you understand? No longer alive! They woke up again and chewed the flesh off other peopleâs bones like fucking animals.â Her voice is increasingly drowned out by tears, which she is obviously fighting back. Damn, sheâs really got herself into something here. And when I think about it, she didnât react any less dramatically about the androids. Although this is really next level.
âDo you really think no one would notice?â
"Theyâre covering it up, for fuckâs sake. Please. You have to get out of here. For the babyâs sake, if nothing else. Just trust me this one time. I beg you.â Even though I think itâs all nonsense, my pulse is still racing. I close my eyes for a moment, trying to calm down. Under different circumstances, I probably wouldnât react this way. âPlease! You have to promise me!» Wow, okay. So now Iâm getting yelled at? I exhale with a huff and clench my free hand into a fist.
âIâll do what I can, okay?â I force the words out between clenched teeth.
Silence
âReally?â Ugh, that sound. The thought of her wiping the snot from her nose disgusts me.
âYes, as soon as you hang up, Iâll take care of it. I promise.â Good thing she canât see my crossed fingers. But if it makes her feel better when I tell her that, then itâs okay. âThank you! You know, itâs important to me to save as many people as possible. Thank you for believing me! I still have so many people to callâŠâ
âYouâre welcome⊠Good luck!â I end the call and put the phone on the table. What the hell was that?
Like a horror movie, only without the picture. Iâd better find a bunker, or a military base equipped with EMP, or what? I laugh out loud. For the first time in a very long time. At least it distracted me and cheered me up for a short while.
POV Daryl
Two months later
âThatâs not mine.â Those words pound in his head. He feels paralyzed, unable to look away despite his conviction. Without another thought, he turns the photo over with a trembling hand. Before reading what is written on it, he glances at Merle and Penny. The two are busy clearing out everything that was still in the shelves. He adjusts his crossbow, clears his throat, and looks at the back of the photo again. In beautiful handwriting decorated with a little heart are written the date of birth, weight, and a name. Charlene. So itâs a girl. He shakes his head unconsciously. Not that he cares. After all, his heart was already racing when they entered the apartment. She could have been one of the undead, and they have to be prepared for any attack. Adrenaline canât be controlled. âIdiot. You know exactly why your pulse is racing.â Daryl has to pull himself together so as not to scrunch up the photo and is torn from his thoughts by Merle.
A photo
A damn Polaroid
Thatâs the only thing he could find about her in her apartment. And that was just by accident. Several people must have been here already and taken everything that was even halfway useful. Everything is scattered around, the furniture is destroyed, and so far they havenât been able to find any food or water. At least they havenât found a body. Neither hers nor a babyâs. Instead, a single photo, probably taken soon after the birth. His chest tightens painfully as he looks at it.
âThereâs nothing here. Letâs go.â Merleâs voice has become surprisingly quieter since the walkers came around. Penny is right behind him and already on her way out when her gaze brushes Darylâs hand.
âWait. Whatâs that? Give it to me.â Oh, he hates her. He has learned to hate her. Sheâs not like Merle, sheâs worse. Much worse. Sheâs so fake and evil. Merle doesnât care, on the contrary. He praises her for it.
âFuck,â he mutters as Penny quickly approaches him and snatches the photo from his hand faster than he can react.
"Oh shit⊠Merle! Did you see that? She really had the baby before the dead got up.â Her laughter is so unsettling that Darylâs face distorts in disgust. âWell, she wonât survive long with that brat anywayâŠâ Penny shrugs and carelessly throws the photo behind her onto the floor. How can a person who used to be your best friend be like that? In a situation like this?
âCome on⊠we have to go⊠before more of them show up and we canât get out of town anymore,â calls Penny as she leaves the apartment after Merle. Daryl curses under his breath. He canât just leave like that. Something is holding him back. He bends down with a slight sigh and picks up the photo.
And just like before, when he sees the baby, he feels his chest tighten again.
What if it is his daughter? No, it canât be. He shakes his head. These thoughts have to stop. Not after what they said about her. He sees his hand start to shake again and hears Merleâs voice in his head.
âBe realistic⊠Even if only a small part of what Penny said is true⊠itâs bad enough and itâs hardly likely that itâs yer child. Sheâs not yours! Be reasonable!â Heâs right. Merle must be right.
âShitâŠâ he curses again and puts the photo in his pocket after another moment.
Maybe sheâs still alive, then he could give her the photo if he ever meets her. That would be the least he could do, because the photo must mean a lot to her.
He pushes away the thought that immediately comes to mind, that he might also be taking it for himself and that he secretly hopes to find her and the baby one day.
AN: Let's say hello to the walkers and annoying Penny. Daryl finds something.
Chapter 7 - Charlene
2070 words
Loneliness
The only feeling that has a firm grip on me and pushes all others into the background. Despite the little miracle growing inside me. Iâm standing in front of the mirror again. I try to pull in my stomach, but the bump can no longer be hidden.
A slight pressure works its way through my stomach from the inside, as if my insides were riding a roller coaster, to the spot where my hand is resting. As if she wanted to show me: âHey, youâre not alone. Have you forgotten me?â Sometimes I wish I could. Sometimes I even manage to. But then the restlessness returns, the questions that torture me night after night. Am I ready for this? Will I even be able to manage this? Was my decision a mistake?
âOuch.â I pull my hand away in reflex. That kick was a lot harder. It makes me sad to know that my daughter will grow up alone with me. A tear runs down my face as I gently stroke my belly.
We donât need them. Neither Penny nor Daryl. At first I was angry, although no, thatâs an understatement. I was furious. But now? That scumbag doesnât deserve me or this baby.
âWe donât need them, my little girl, youâll see. We can do this!â I whisper, trembling as I breathe in. I hope so, so much. But what if Iâm not a good mother? I have to be strong, more than I could ever imagine. That becomes clearer to me with each passing day. I saw Penny not long ago. It was painful. At first, I didnât recognize her. She was totally skin and bones, with dark circles under her eyes. It was just assumptions running through my head. But each one was worse than the last. She has changed so much. At first, I thought about saying something to her. But then I realized that Penny was never the person I thought she was. She took advantage of me so many times, but she hasnât been as mean as she has been since Merle. And me, stupid idiot, actually felt guilty for a moment. As if I were responsible for what she does with her life.
Since then, Iâve thought a lot about talking to Daryl again. But letâs be honest. Why would Merle and Penny take drugs and Daryl just sit there and watch? Heâs definitely just as deep in the shit. My baby doesnât deserve a life like that. And neither do I.
Until two weeks ago, at least work was like family. For a few hours, I wasnât alone. Some of my coworkers even helped me get things like a crib and set it up. Daisy, the receptionist, even took me to the supermarket once a week because my damn car still isnât fixed. Itâs just too expensive, and Iâll definitely need the money when the little one is born. Everything was fine, I felt good. But then came the shock. Iâm not allowed to work anymore. And since then, I havenât heard a word from Daisy and the others. They donât even reply to my text messages. Only a few more weeks, then sheâll finally be here. And then maybe I can go back to work. At least, I hope so.
The shrill ringing of my cell phone makes me jump. Somehow, Iâm glad to be torn away from these thoughts. But when I look at the display and recognize Jennyâs number, who worked with me in the office, my stomach clenches painful. Sheâs not interested in me or the baby. The only thing this woman is concerned about is herself and the gossip she can spread. I was always good for that. No matter what she heard or saw, she always spread it as quickly as possible to everyone she knew. Unfortunately, I belong to that circle. The stories she tells are indeed sometimes amusing, like listening to a fairy tale as a child. But nothing more than that. A smile crosses my lips. I remember well how she told everyone in a panic that the government was planning to smuggle humanoid androids into society, for control purposes, of course. This would all be related to the pigeons that eavesdrop on us every day. I look at the flashing mobile phone. A little distraction certainly wonât hurt me. Maybe I should write down all her stories and become a best-selling author. Shaking my head, I finally accept the call. âHey, Jenââ
âListen, you need to listen to me carefully now!â Okay, wow, not even a hello or anything. She doesnât even let me answer, but talks so fast and so much that my brain canât process it. Does she breathe through her hair or how is that even possible?
âJen! Wait a minute. I didnât understand a word. Slow down, please.â On the one hand, I want to laugh, but on the other hand, thereâs this feeling in my stomach thatâs growing stronger. I donât like it. Not even a little bit.
âYou â have â to â leave. Go to the ââ What kind of shitty connection does she have?
âFew people. Promise me, please.â Damn, what the hell. Somethingâs wrong. She sounds totally frantic.
âJen! Why? Whatâs going on?â My pulse quickens. No, not a good idea. I canât get upset.
âVirusâwaitââ Crackling.
âJen? Hello?â
Fuck. fuck. fuck.
âNow Iâve got everything in the car. I went shopping before everything collapses. Fuck. You know, okay, listen. Give me a second. I need to take a deep breath.â Okay, Iâll wait. But could you please hurry up? My nerves. I hear her taking deep breaths and counting. Is she struggling with a panic attack?
âHoney, listen. Letâs start over. You have to get away. Go to the outskirts of town. Where there are few people.â Why does Dixon immediately come to mind? Fuck it. âThis is going to be the end. The Frenchââ She takes another deep breath. I can literally hear her shaking. âThe French have discovered a virus. Itâs said to be very dangerous and no one knows where it came from or where it is already.â Okay, now I canât help but smile. So, the usual conspiracy theories. âDonât you think we would have heard about it on the news?â
âI donât think Thomas, whose uncle works in one of these labs, is lying to me. He never has.» Oh, right, Thomas. Why didnât I think of that? That makes it more convincing. âI know youâre going to laugh at me. They always laugh at me. But this time itâs real. He showed me videos. Peopleâthey attack othersâand bite them. They want to eat them.â
"Calm down, Jen. People are assholes and attack each other⊠even with unconventional methods. Mike Tyson has bitten other people too.â
âNo, Iâm not going to calm down. They were dead! Do you understand? No longer alive! They woke up again and chewed the flesh off other peopleâs bones like fucking animals.â Her voice is increasingly drowned out by tears, which she is obviously fighting back. Damn, sheâs really got herself into something here. And when I think about it, she didnât react any less dramatically about the androids. Although this is really next level.
âDo you really think no one would notice?â
"Theyâre covering it up, for fuckâs sake. Please. You have to get out of here. For the babyâs sake, if nothing else. Just trust me this one time. I beg you.â Even though I think itâs all nonsense, my pulse is still racing. I close my eyes for a moment, trying to calm down. Under different circumstances, I probably wouldnât react this way. âPlease! You have to promise me!» Wow, okay. So now Iâm getting yelled at? I exhale with a huff and clench my free hand into a fist.
âIâll do what I can, okay?â I force the words out between clenched teeth.
Silence
âReally?â Ugh, that sound. The thought of her wiping the snot from her nose disgusts me.
âYes, as soon as you hang up, Iâll take care of it. I promise.â Good thing she canât see my crossed fingers. But if it makes her feel better when I tell her that, then itâs okay. âThank you! You know, itâs important to me to save as many people as possible. Thank you for believing me! I still have so many people to callâŠâ
âYouâre welcome⊠Good luck!â I end the call and put the phone on the table. What the hell was that?
Like a horror movie, only without the picture. Iâd better find a bunker, or a military base equipped with EMP, or what? I laugh out loud. For the first time in a very long time. At least it distracted me and cheered me up for a short while.
POV Daryl
Two months later
âThatâs not mine.â Those words pound in his head. He feels paralyzed, unable to look away despite his conviction. Without another thought, he turns the photo over with a trembling hand. Before reading what is written on it, he glances at Merle and Penny. The two are busy clearing out everything that was still in the shelves. He adjusts his crossbow, clears his throat, and looks at the back of the photo again. In beautiful handwriting decorated with a little heart are written the date of birth, weight, and a name. Charlene. So itâs a girl. He shakes his head unconsciously. Not that he cares. After all, his heart was already racing when they entered the apartment. She could have been one of the undead, and they have to be prepared for any attack. Adrenaline canât be controlled. âIdiot. You know exactly why your pulse is racing.â Daryl has to pull himself together so as not to scrunch up the photo and is torn from his thoughts by Merle.
A photo
A damn Polaroid
Thatâs the only thing he could find about her in her apartment. And that was just by accident. Several people must have been here already and taken everything that was even halfway useful. Everything is scattered around, the furniture is destroyed, and so far they havenât been able to find any food or water. At least they havenât found a body. Neither hers nor a babyâs. Instead, a single photo, probably taken soon after the birth. His chest tightens painfully as he looks at it.
âThereâs nothing here. Letâs go.â Merleâs voice has become surprisingly quieter since the walkers came around. Penny is right behind him and already on her way out when her gaze brushes Darylâs hand.
âWait. Whatâs that? Give it to me.â Oh, he hates her. He has learned to hate her. Sheâs not like Merle, sheâs worse. Much worse. Sheâs so fake and evil. Merle doesnât care, on the contrary. He praises her for it.
âFuck,â he mutters as Penny quickly approaches him and snatches the photo from his hand faster than he can react.
"Oh shit⊠Merle! Did you see that? She really had the baby before the dead got up.â Her laughter is so unsettling that Darylâs face distorts in disgust. âWell, she wonât survive long with that brat anywayâŠâ Penny shrugs and carelessly throws the photo behind her onto the floor. How can a person who used to be your best friend be like that? In a situation like this?
âCome on⊠we have to go⊠before more of them show up and we canât get out of town anymore,â calls Penny as she leaves the apartment after Merle. Daryl curses under his breath. He canât just leave like that. Something is holding him back. He bends down with a slight sigh and picks up the photo.
And just like before, when he sees the baby, he feels his chest tighten again.
What if it is his daughter? No, it canât be. He shakes his head. These thoughts have to stop. Not after what they said about her. He sees his hand start to shake again and hears Merleâs voice in his head.
âBe realistic⊠Even if only a small part of what Penny said is true⊠itâs bad enough and itâs hardly likely that itâs yer child. Sheâs not yours! Be reasonable!â Heâs right. Merle must be right.
âShitâŠâ he curses again and puts the photo in his pocket after another moment.
Maybe sheâs still alive, then he could give her the photo if he ever meets her. That would be the least he could do, because the photo must mean a lot to her.
He pushes away the thought that immediately comes to mind, that he might also be taking it for himself and that he secretly hopes to find her and the baby one day.
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