𝑪𝑳𝑬𝑴𝑬𝑵𝑻𝑰𝑵𝑬 .

         she’s grateful for sybill’s subtle brand of humour, offering a smile in return that she hopes only holds a smidgen of the tiredness that she feels. “ obviously so, ” she lets out a single breathless chuckle. “ not quite sure how it thinks it has the right, though. an’ it’ll be in the bottom of me trunk soon if it doesn’t fall in line. ” 

         “ i dunno if it’s quite fixable, but we can try. ” she shrugs, placing her hand in his despite the twinge of worry that pokes at the back of her mind. lily brushes it off, mirroring his smile. he’s happy, she’s happy that he’s happy, and the gesture is innocent. 

          “ would y’ come with me? ” she tilts her head ever so slightly, leaning forward, grateful for remus’s generosity. his words coax a smile onto her face, one she’s grateful for considering the unshakeable knot of anxiety that’s been living in her stomach for the past few days. “ i suppose a bit of nothingness could be a good palate cleanser. ”

the golden girls  +  aesthetics    ( @macmcry​ / @mvrleymk​ )

          she can’t help but let her smile widen as she takes in the image of him with bottles in hand, clearly still giddy from the fabled post-quidditch surge of energy she’d heard about from both mary and marlene. “ well, y’ should be proud o’ yourself, ” lily insists, “ i’m proud o’ you. ” she means it sincerely, especially considering the amount of time she knew quidditch players spent yearning for this exact outcome. “ i dunno. ” she shrugs loosely, pushing long red hair back from her face. “ the only parties i’ve been t’ in my entire hogwarts career have been slug club parties. i was actually voted world’s worst party girl 1977. ”

          a sigh leaks through parted lips as lily collapses onto the couch in a heap. in reality, she knows that lucky objects are all just little ways the brain comforted itself in the face of variables, but on the other side of the coin —- she wanted it back. “ maybe i left it in defense against the dark arts. ” she wonders aloud, looking to remus to discover that he looks lighter today. “ i should’ve asked about your day —- how was it? ” 

          “ m’ sorry —- ” lily bends down to retrieve her book bag, which had seemingly become sentient and hopped straight off of her shoulder to land at sybill’s feet. exhaustion is woven throughout her voice, having pulled yet another involuntary all-nighter —- the second one this week. “ such a bugger, this bag is. i simply don’t deserve this treatment, ” she jokes, offering a weak smile.

            inhaling quietly as she enters the gryffindor common room through the portrait hole, lily aims herself in james’s direction before she can lose her nerve. since the rose on valentine’s day, the ice that had set itself up around her heart when it concerned james potter had thawed considerably —- being treated as a person rather than an unreachable goal has warmed her to him. “ mind if i sit —- there? ” she asks, pointing to the seat beside him with a minuscule smile. 

           “ hey ⁠—- ” catching sight of rabastan’s tall frame in passing, lily spins on the heel of her sneaker. “ i heard about the scouts. ” she offers a warm smile, a brief nod accompanying it as to not seem too excited for her own good. “ and i saw the match. a really fierce performance from you, i have t’ say. might give our team a run for their money when the time comes. ”

          running around like a chicken with her head cut off, the source of lily’s panic is a misplaced lucky quill —- trivial, considering all that was going on with the war, but this is how lily expresses her nerves. over little things, quietly, and constantly. she’s searching the cushions of a couch in the common room when her fellow housemate stumbles into the wake of her mayhem. “ oh —- remus, ” she exclaims, “ have you seen my quill? the green feathered one. ”

“ maybe i couldn’t do it for you, ” lily starts, “ but i could show y’ some tricks. so y’ can put more time towards the fun bits. ” her offer is a tad on the scandalous side, that she knows –– but lily has always been giving towards those that she liked. rab was no exception. “ whatever you’d consider the fun bits to be. ”

watching mary’s dramatic outburst puts lily’s concerns at ease, if only for a moment. she watches her friend with wide eyes, eyebrows raised skyward in an act of offence that rival’s mary’s own. “ i have done nothin’ but care for you all these years, mary macdonald, ” she jabs, placing a hand flat over her heart, “ how dare you stand there effin’ and blindin’ when you know that for a fine fact. ” a laugh leaks from her lips, breaking her character in a second. “ everybody’s got somethin’ that they’re good at. ” lily’s shrug is small, her reluctance to sing james potter’s praises obvious. 

“ ah ––– i’ve blocked those few incidents out of me mind. and you should too, ” she jests, “ if y’ don’t want t’ risk triggering me into a month long vacation indoors once the sun does come back. ” though lily had hardened many of her girlhood sensitivities over the years she’d been at hogwarts, her pain threshold still left something to be desired. the few moments between acquiring a sunburn and letting dorcas heal it were not moments she relished. “ nothing could stop me, really. ” she shrugs, tilting her face up towards the clouds where they acted as a shield between her and the uv rays she was so susceptible to. “ i’d almost dare t’ say it’s hardly even makeshift anymore. ”  

“ i think that’d be the easiest, for me. ” she shrugs, kicking at a solid chunk of thawing snow and watching it skid a few feet in front of them as they walk. “ maths are guaranteed. there aren’t many rogue possibilities. ”

“ aye, lily evans misses the sun, ” she exclaims, voice haughty. “ i’d show up for your birthday, doe. any time, any place. dead of winter, hottest day of summer. ” she can’t help but giggle at her dramatic wording, but the meaning behind her speech remains the same. “ i am dead happy t’ celebrate with you and the girls, though. makeshift cake in the dorm is my favourite birthday tradition. ”

with a few long strides, lily falls into step at his side. it’s a stark contrast, to see him smile –– especially against the way he’d looked during their last chat. “ oh, y’know. ” she shrugs loosely, smiling down at the dew-soaked grass as she jokes. “ v formations. snitch catches versus overall point earning. it’s all very stressful for little old me. ” 

“ i hate to let you down, but –– my hand eye coordination leaves somethin’ t’ be desired. it’s quite shite, if i’m honest. ” she smiles, breathing out a laugh into the cool morning air. “ never can, these days. ”