dearest creature,

“Beams thrown from the Heligoland Lighthouse.” Lightships and lighthouses. 1913.

7/

After much weeping, in secret

and in front of you, after having staged

many acts of desperation, you made

the final decision to surrender

and never to be seen again. I am done.

I have acted like a madman. I will not let the water run

from the source of my evil and my good:

these pacts between men are not for you or perhaps

you’re too skilled in the art of breaking them,

guided by a Genie that gives you certainty

by which you are transfigured.  You

know the right button to push.

When I speak you tell me “no”

and I tremble with disgust and fury

at the thought of our unforgettable happy hours.

Nothing thicker than a knife’s blade separates melancholy from happiness.

Laure Albin Guillot :: Mains et Piano | Hands and piano, ca. 1935. | src Artcurial

“there you sit with the bombs falling around you. What can one say— except that I love you and I’ve got to live through this strange quiet evening thinking of you sitting there alone. Dearest— let me have a line… You have given me such happiness…”