daydreamer.

She wanted to be of more help, but how could she? After failing to even identify herself among dozens upon dozens of missing children’s posters– how would she recognise another? She was certain to fail, though that didn’t drive away from, at least, trying.  ❛  Why take someone at all?  ❜  The teen began, gaze wavering.  ❛  There’s really no… good reason for anything people like that do, is there?  ❜  Bitterness held the words captive and she made a conscious attempt to conceal it.  ❛  Okay, so… besides, her, Rowan– ❜  The name felt odd to speak aloud: familiarity with the way lips would form and familiarity with the identity sounded once they had. Maybe she’d heard Dalton speak of her, after all. She wasn’t as attentive as she’d like to claim, after all.  ❛  Who else has been taken in Sheffield? ‘Cause… a lot of them seem to connect to him, and it should be LAUGHABLE, and it is, but– it’s plausible, isn’t it? If two’s a coincidence, and three’s a pattern… It might just be crazy enough to be true.  ❜  The teen paused, allowing cobalt tints to reunite with Lila’s.  ❛  But I’ll look wherever you want me to.  ❜

      She fails to connect the dots, her initial suspicion directed towards the urban legends of Sheffield.  ❛  I’m so sorry.  ❜  It feels odd, expression sympathy towards someone on the other end of her own trauma. Even if it’s not her own, specifically. But she understands it, suddenly, the withdrawn nature of Marion Blake– the reason for the family being torn apart. Though as sought for pieces of the puzzle connect with one another, so does one unwanted. Kevin might’ve played the part of a victim, but she was once the culprit: the reason children disappeared as he herself once had, the reason families like Warren’s fall apart. And guilt was quick to set in.  ❛  She might not be. Tons of kids, they… they come back.  ❜  The words are false reassurance, those entering the Oswalt premises never holding the fate.  ❛  Do they think it’s the same person who… who took Tommy? ❜  

eyes narrow with the beginnings of a sly teasing grin. as IF she hadn’t suspected from the START. there is no PITY here. lila hasn’t lost anything, there’s no reason to enable her to feel sorry for herself.  ❛  you could have led with that. i mean the flowershop comment is still a deal-breaker for ME anyway, but what did you like about him? eyes? hair? obviously not his BRAIN, i can see where that went.  ❜

      Thin brows were brought closer together, lips pursed as she took in the other’s words. LOOKING FOR SOMEONE. Lila wasn’t the only one, even if her & Kevin’s search differed greatly from one another. At least, that’s what the younger assumed.  ❛  Not weird at all, ❜  She assured, more so to herself than the brunette.  ❛  Who are you looking for?  ❜ 

❛  it’s still an option, your words are not that bad, but it wouldn’t hurt to be open. hey, maybe one day you’ll have the opposite problem, too many things you’re decent at and not knowing which skill to hone and polish.  ❜  she is careful with her compliments — she strays from superlatives, keeps it subtle, believes in telling her children the TRUTH.  most of the time at least, where they’re concerned. the rules are different when it comes to what she tells them about herself. the last time they lived in sheffield they’d never seen her cry ( oh but she had, behind closed doors, in closets, once on akiva’s shoulder )  ❛  you weren’t CRUSHING on him or anything… were you?  ❜

       Kevin was used to being the one in need of help– helpless & lost; incapable of aiding anyone, even herself. The ability to be of assistance brought warmth to her chest, shielding her from the cool autumn air.  ❛  Yeah,  ❜  The younger begins, shifting in her current position.  ❛  Of course, I wouldn’t– offer, unless I really wanted to. And I do. What’re friends for, right?  ❜  The last statement is seen as risky, at best. Though she hopes, prays even, that she hasn’t overstepped any unforeseen boundaries. 

          They’re caught up in vague comments & avoidance of situations experienced by both. To what extent, unknown to the girls themselves.  ❛  You’d be surprised.  ❜  Words are spoken with a huff, eyebrow quirked in the process.   ❛  Sometimes, maybe, you just need another perspective. I could help, if you want.  ❜  The offer doesn’t derive from nosiness, rather a desire to be of help– to garner trust & friendship.

❛   honey ‚  you have free will. that’s a powerful thing. and you have time. feel free enough to try everything. if creativity is what you KNOW you have, try it all, poetry, journalism, art, music, academia, copywriting, advertising, even if it’s science … travel — find yourself. take your time. it’s okay. the world is not going to run away from you for taking time to figure yourself out. ❜  lila’s following concession is met with a sideways grin, fingers reaching to trace her dark hair, IDENTICAL to her own raven tresses.  ❛  his life probably lacks colour and variety, if thats all he thinks women are for.  ❜

          Eyes narrow as Lila speaks, the teenager being all too familiar with the situation the other found herself in.  ❛  Well, – what makes you think they’re lies? Is it a gut feeling, or… ‘Cause I’ve learned that you should REALLY trust those.  ❜  Advice doesn’t mean much from Kevin Oswalt; after all, she wasn’t exactly the poster-child for a successful life lead. And no matter how much she loved her friends & those she surrounded herself with, she was never going to be.  ❛  You’d be the first.  ❜  

❛   listen to me. he doesn’t know you. or your worth.   ❜   a FLOWERSHOP.  not that marion has anything against flowershops or florists, perfectly lovely people, but it’s the principle of the matter.  ❛   and we, in this family don’t let chauvinist pigs define us.  right?  you’re a wordsmith. slice him up gently piece by piece and arrange them with his innards in a pretty vase. metaphorically. in fiction. in poetry. in whatever word form you want. and when the people admire it? send him a thank-you note.  ❜ peter kimball. at the next parents week, you’re a dead man.

          The statement brought on unwanted memories; a bitter reminder of her situation, one that appeared to never quite change. She still had her friends, but a family? Kevin would only be given one she’d chosen for herself, but perhaps, just maybe, that was the better alternative.  ❛  Has anyone ever lied to you? Big lies, I mean… Not ‘ Oh, you look great in that ’ or– ‘ Yeah, I’ll totally… call you ’ - - -   ❜  She trails off.   ❛  I don’t know about that. Not a lot of people listen to what I have to say. Or think, I guess.  ❜  

sometimes she feels like lila just plays her for compliments — it’s hard to tell. the question had been at the tip of her tongue — to avoid the cliché statements, UNTIL that last part. ❛  what?  did he really say that? who is this guy again, name, details. have i seen him?  ❜

     “ an awful lot of people come up to buy concessions, miss. i’m sorry i can’t be of more help. — – do you want a free slurpee ? ” 

          Kevin wasn’t the most philosophical person around, but she wasn’t about to shy away from the conversation. Or the opportunity to get to know the older further. So, she shrugs and brows drew together in thought.  ❛  Maybe we should just start saying what we think.  ❜  The teen offers in response, arms crossing against a slender frame.  ❛  We’d be much better off without lies, anyway, right?  ❜