'♡

me when any women’s sports come on:

Back in 2018, an Argentine journalist gave Messi his mom’s lucky red ribbon when the team was struggling.

My family always told me and my sisters that there was no such thing as same-sex attraction. Rather, it was a choice that people made because they were lonely, ugly, or insecure and unable to attract/hold on to someone of the opposite sex. I just grew up believing that gay couples were in these relationships because they just…couldn’t find someone “correct” to love them.

Now I want you to imagine how I internalized that once I started experiencing attraction to other girls and developing feelings for them. Or when I realized I couldn’t connect with men on a romantic level, but had no issues connecting with women. I completely believed I was too ugly to attract men, so I was experiencing this false attraction to women. Or that I was just too lonely and not getting enough attention from men. This is all laughable since attention from men is a dime a dozen.

It's just never gonna click, man. Why can't I like a guy. I could have so many options and so many possibilities but I just had to be gay. I could've dated that kid who liked me way back in elementary school, that dude I walk to geo class with, or some even random guy. I could get the most ridiculous crushes on the stupidest fictional dudes. Having any of that would make me so happy, but no. I just had to be lesbian huh?

It never bothered me, not loving men. I was out as aroace (I am aro and aspec, but I keep those parts of my identity more private for personal reasons) but it never bothered me, because I didn't have to like anyone. But now I'm stuck here, and I don't know where I went wrong.