Dagdromen

“That’s all I want. Just you and me. Always.”

But saying “If we’re meant to be together, it will happen” is bullshit. That’s not how love or anything like that works. You make a choice to love someone, you make a choice to forgive, you make a choice to make it work every damn day even when you can’t stand to look them in the eye, you make a choice to love them unconditionally even when they eat the leftover food that you were anticipating to eat all day, you make a choice to let them shower first even though you’re the one running late, you make a choice to sacrifice, you make a choice to love someone so much to just put your dreams on hold so they can go and finish school so y’all can live the dream together, you make a choice. This shit isn’t fate or happenstance, it’s a damn choice that you make every damn day. “Maybe we’ll end up together” has no say in this.

How many times does a girl have to get used before she finds someone who will love and care for her unconditionally?

“Dat je verliefd mag worden op iemand die steeds voor jou kiest en dat je je thuis voelt als je naar ze kijkt.”

“Salute to those who feel empty, alone and broken but they still manage to give encouragements to others.”

My father had taught me to be nice first, because you can always be mean later, but once you’ve been mean to someone, they won’t believe the nice anymore. So be nice, be nice, until it’s time to stop being nice, then destroy them.

I’m not used to being loved. I wouldn’t know what to do.

It wasn’t that long, and it certainly wasn’t the kind of kiss you see in movies these days, but it was wonderful in its own way, and all I can remember about the moment is that when our lips touched, I knew the memory would last forever.

Never apologize for burning too brightly or collapsing into yourself every night. That is how galaxies are made.

1. Every second of every minute you were with him, you thought of him as God, when he should have been seeing a Goddess in you too. But instead he just saw a girl and that is why it hurts this much. You need to love each other for the humanity within you, or you should love each other like Gods, there is no middle path. 2. The darkest version of this kind of damage is how little you think of yourself right now. And it is because he didn’t want you. But think of all the people who do want you, who think you are special, who think the world of you. They may not be him, but the trouble is, you let him become the sun when you should have let him be human instead. Humans are flawed. No one deserves that pedestal in your head but you. 3. There will always be another boy. But what you should be looking for is a man. 4. The strongest thing about you was the thing he had forgotten to appreciate. And you deserve someone who looks at that very thing about you and respects and admires you greatly for it. 5. He didn’t understand, nor appreciate everything you had given up just to see him smile that day. And who wants to be with someone that doesn’t appreciate you? 6. Even when you said you needed him the most, even when you had given him that third, fourth, fifth chance to make amends, he did not apologise the way he should have to you. and you deserve more than that any day. 7. There is enough kindness and strength in your heart that you will want to give him a third, fourth, fifth chance. Don’t. Not today, not tomorrow, not day after. No one is worth the time and effort, no one other than you for yourself. 8. Start thinking of three things that made you smile today and every day. And remember that without him, there are still things in the world that make you smile. Hold onto that. 9. Do everything you enjoyed when he thought was annoying or simply not good enough, even the smallest things. Feel the freedom of no one telling you what you should and shouldn’t do. 10. Remember the girl you were before you met him. Remember her, with the smiles and the grace and the funny stories that didn’t involve him. Remember her with the strength to get over anything. Channel her. Bring her back. She deserves resurrection.

Do you think the universe fights for souls to be together? Some things are too strange and strong to be coincidences.

I gave you things I wasn’t sure I even had.

My heart is so tired.