Dec 19, 2017
KIM JONGHYUN, 04.08.1990 – 18.12.2017 “So it’s true, when all is said and done, grief is the price we pay for love.”
#it's so strange#his solo songs about depression and loneliness are hitting the charts#but I'm crying listening to all the happy energetic songs#he's arguably he vocal person kpop re: depression and mental illness#and he was very open about his own struggles#yet he smiled so much despite his pain#and loved and was loved by many in return#because he shone so brightly for everyone who was struggling#but in the end#the one he couldn't love was himself#I hate it so much when doctors and normal people say#just love yourself#(bc haha don't you think I haven't tried? don't you think I want to?)#bc there's a certain truth to it#but failing to love yourself isn't the source of the problem is it?#it's more of a symptom#but then the source of the problem is your own self#it's not like this is a new problem either#the source the symtoms and arguably even the means/rational to break out is well known by now#but how do you win against yourself#I don' really know where I'm going with this#but maybe something will change after this#I've been trying#but I can always try harder
