empty;

MALIA: yeah! i said what i said! banked into the sunset :D

MALIA: ... on that note, i take back the :D and replace it with a loud D: you callin' me a liar?

Lex: Mm.

Max: icb i never noticed those theatres exist

Max: do you like them?

Max: ....the fuck do you mean there's BDSM based theatres?? wtf do they show, obnoxious pornos?

MALIA: he's alive n' kickin' 😃 maybe not punchin'

MALIA: okokok enough jokin'-- yeah, he's okay! he had to have surgery and now he's home restin' or gettin' banged into the sunset, pretty sure

MALIA: and 'course i'm okay! i'm always okay~

LEX: Oh. I.. banged into the sunset?

Those, I’m well aware of. I’ve seen a few where people get..questionable things stuck inside themselves and honestly, just a few episodes of that was enough. It depends on what you’re looking for. There’s the romance/claim ones. Home renovation, claim swap, etc. Well– have you had first hand experience thus far? Seems as though a lot has changed in a week.

Questionable things stuck inside people is actually just a regular night in the New Eden Emergency Department. I don’t have to watch that one TV to know that experience. The claim ones can be fun, if a bit dramatic. It has-- actually. A close friend of mine has shown signs. 

MALIA: this is a semi-formal apology for my drunk shenanigans with jasper that probs took super, super precious time away from you n' your boo 😬😬😬😬

Max: smh

Max: uh

Max: like what kind of places, exactly?

MALIA: oh goqd

MALIA: oh no

MALIA: kcan you gput her back where you found her

MALIA: i don'et watn jasper sad

LEX: I.. we're already here, I'm sorry.

Max: yeah, no shit lol obviously

Lex: Ha. Ha.

Amira closed her eyes as sure fingers ghosted over the scars that marred her face. Funny how the world worked like that, beginning and ending in a kitchen with a shrieking smoke detector. Fighting the urge to cling as Lex pulled away slightly, Amira hesitantly made eye contact with her. “I- they are. I’m just…” With an audible groan she looked away in frustration. “I get freaked out and I do stupid shit like this and just make it worse when all I have to do is just talk to you but talking always gets me in trouble so I try doing something and it’s just… this,” she muttered half-waving at the kitchen that was probably still somewhat ruined. “I’m not young or pretty or good in the kitchen. I know it’s not something you care about, but I keep thinking about how you… you were tempted, and I swear this isn’t about that.” 

She let out another frustrated sound as she tried to find the proper words to explain how they’d gotten here. “I know you do important things. And.. I’d never ask you to stop. Just like you never asked me to stop protesting. But I… I need you a little more. Here. Just for a little while, and I’ll get better, I swear. I won’t always be this messy, but.. just for now? Please?”

“Talking does not get you in trouble,” she laughed slightly, but she understood it. Understood why. Talking was difficult, and Lex knew how hard it could be just to spit it out. “You’re not good in the kitchen, you’re younger than me, and you’re absolutely fucking stunning. And yes, I was tempted. I was, I admitted that, fully. But I also know that what we have is irreplaceable. You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me, and I wouldn’t throw that away for anything. So just-- please remember that I love you.” It was a bit of a ramble, and she knew it. She paused when it looked like Amira wanted to talk, so she slowed down and let her get it off her chest. 

MALIA: okuay! i knew i could colunt on you! f

MALIA: wait who is we d

LEX: You're welcome.

MALIA: manzor park :( in front of that place tiwh the byig sign

MALIA: we're gonan fidn the street

LEX: It'll be there in fifteen.

MALIA: 😭😭😭😭😭😭

MALIA: dum yeps? DDO YOTU THINK I WOULD KID ABOUT THIGS?

MALIA: oh god cacps lock

MALIA: jaasper threhw up and his arm snappd i need hcelp plesae mqiss

LEX: He.. oh god.

MALIA: hellog? hospital?

MALIA: is miss xaddi there?

MALIA: zmiss lex?!? hello? 911 aforreal, lxike forreal forreal.

MALIA: sI need an ambulance for kmy buddy, stAT!

LEX: I.. did I not say be careful?

Amira felt Lex falter and filed it away for later. The before and after moment. But she stayed, solid but soft with her arms around Amira. For once, it didn’t feel claustrophobic to have someone crowd her after an episode. It had been years since she’d had one, and Rosana was the only one who had successfully managed to breach that wall entirely. And here, she had let Lex in without even realizing. Her heart swelled and she let her massage out the tension in her hands and wrists. Skillful fingers pressed into muscle, coaxing her into relaxing. “Sorry,” she whispered, cheeks burning red. 

“I know you’re not. And… I- God, this is so embarrassing,” she huffed out, but she tamped down the urge to run away. “I haven’t had an episode like this in a long time. Years, really. The last time was after-” she paused, carefully avoiding the elephant in the room. “After I was burned. But things had been better, but I guess with the alarm and the smoke and the look on your face and your voice, it just… it’s been a rough couple of months.”

“No need to apologize.” Lex smiled down softly at her partner. “And it’s really not embarrassing, either. It’s trauma. It’s messy and awful, but a response like this is normal, even after years.” But immediately Lex understood why she was hesitant and embarrassed about it, and touched the scar on her lips lightly. It took nothing away from Amira’s beauty or handsomeness, but was just a part of her and her past. Moving her fingers away she trailed them down her cheek and jawline. A gentle reminder that she was listening and she would never. 

Amira flinched as Lex leaned in and her brain realized with a sudden drop why she was having such a visceral reaction to this. She had known on some level but it sank in with a finality that made her want to throw up. Ducking her head so it pressed against Lex’s shoulder, she took comfort in her closeness without having to see the look in her eyes. The bewildered confusion, the unconditional love and worry. The way that she seemed to know exactly what Amira needed before she knew herself. It made her shake, realizing what her body feared even before her mind had. 

“It’s how our mom died,” she said hollowly. “She was making dinner and.. me and Rosana were loud. Distracting. Being kids, you know? She turned around for one second to tell us to knock it off and-” Her fingers dug further into her palms and her breath caught. “She burned something. Set the smoke alarm off and then he came charging in. There was yelling and screaming and the alarm and smoke and.. blood.” Amira whispered the last word, seeing the scene as clearly in her mind’s eye as the night it had happened. “I’ve never told anyone that before.”

Fingers continued to card through Amira’s hair, and she rested her cheek against her, giving her some closeness to show that she was going to be right there. And keep her safe. She expected a response to her own words, more tears, a few kisses, and then some joking around and laughter as the tension faded. As they both realized that this was silly. But then. It wasn’t silly. It was-- Her mom. She swallowed hard, faltering a bit with her fingers in her hair, but continued right after. 

Her world was a million miles away, an acutely vivid memory that dug up all of the trauma she had spent hours unpacking and dealing with. She was supposed to be better, to be fixed. Her fingers curled inward into fists, nails digging into her palms as Amira tried to shove it all back away. But the second Lex touched her, the efforts crumbled and the tears began to fall. An ugly sob bubbled up and she lurched forward. Lex was apologizing for doing nothing wrong, and it made the guilt sink further in her stomach. 

“I’m sorry, I just wanted to do a g-good thing,” she hiccuped out through hitched breaths. “You were.. I th-thought if I was better, you’d s-stay with me.” Saying the words out loud only confirmed how silly they were, but at the time, she had believed it with her whole heart. “And I j-just made it worse. I’m s-sorry.”

It was confusion that displayed on her face at all of Amira’s words. She would stay if Amira was better? God-- she was perfect for her. Eyebrows twisting together, she leaned forward to press a gentle kiss to her forehead, then her nose. Thumbs swiped at the tears that fell, and she made sure to shift closer, trying to unfurl the ball she’d made herself into. “Baby, it’s okay. It’s okay.” The amount of upset that Amira was displaying was a bit disproportionate to what had happened and Lex didn’t understand, but she didn’t have to. All she had to do was comfort.