I just realized something to what's happening with my life especially when it comes to my past lovelife. For sure maraming makakarelate lalo na yung mga naka-exeperience na ng "Almost" Relationships. Ang nangyayari kasi, every time I meet a new guy tapos a-awra sa akin and I find him interesting, of course, ini-entertain ko naman pero I'm not the easy type of girl. So syempre I get to know him first and then most of the time, from my different experiences on dating with guys, I found out the guys I've met came from a long-term relationships. Me, being an NBSB (No boyfriend since birth) tends to have this intimidating feeling and some sort of hesitation na parang "Uy, baka hindi pa to nakaka-move on sa past niyakasi ang tagal nila." or "Oops, mahirap yata kalabanin or higitan yung matagal na realsyon." But then, I said to myself, every relationshipshave their own levels and are special in its own way. So, I tried to know the person more and open myself and see what I can give for the process to grow. However, after series of dating, exchanging of sweet messages, late night and morning talks, suddenly, the guys I've met started to pull away, gave me cold treatment, or even worst, just shut the communcation down. I don't know why. Basta laging ganun yung nangyayari sa mga nami-meet ko. Most of their excuses were: 1. "Busy lang talaga." 2. "I also have my life other than looking at my phone." 3. Ito matindi na akala ko sa palabas ko lang maririnig, "It's not you, it's me." (Ang bullshit). Hahaha 4. "You're too good to be true." (WTF??!!) 5. "Madami lang talagang inasaasiko lately." I dunno, nangyayari tong eksena na to kapag I'm starting to be attached or express myself tpwards the guy. Lalo na yung malapit na ako ma-fall and nag e-effort na din ako makita lang yung guy. Sabi ko ng, hindi lang once nangyari, most of the time na may nami-meet ako, ganun. Parang sumpa, ang bullshit lang. Haha! Then sa pagtataka ko and sa sobrang curious ko bakit bigla nalang silang nawawala, I found out that they're back on their long-term exes. Whew. Ang galing. Yung akala kong busy, busy pala makipag balikan sa ex. Another bullshit moment. Haha! Kaya kapag may nami-meet ako ngayon careful na ako lalo na kapag sinabi nung guy na move on na siya sa ex niya. Hahaha! Of course, masakit yun sa akin. Kasi parang "Hey, una sa lahat nananahmik ako tapos bigla kang dadating sa buhay ko tapos iiwan mo nalang ako basta basta kung kailan na fall na ako sayo." Pakshet. Hahaha! Intro boys kumbaga. Diba, how could these guys be so heartless to hurt such pure soul? But then, blessing in disguise na rin na hindi isa sa kanila ang nakatuluyan ko dahil obviouly, none of them deserves my love. Minsan naisip ko, baka ako yung cupid. My mission is to make these men realize to fight for who they really love and huwag ng pakawalan yung love na yun. Yun nga lang, sad part is, hindi ako yun. Yung long-term ex pala nila. Siguro din along the way na nakilala nila ako, narealize nila na mas okay pa rin yung matagal na na kakilala kasi they already know every detail of each other. Ayaw na or tamad na mag adjust for a new relationship kaya they just don't give their best sa akin. Haha! Sad life. Well, for a positive note, in time I know makakahanap din ako ng perfect man para sa akin. The one who will fight and enjoy my company. Yung kahit ilang past na ang dumating sakanya whether long term or short term, ako yung makikita niya na makakasama niya always. ALWAYS. Kasi walang forever! Hahaha! And kapag nangyari yun? I'll make sure that he will be the luckiest man on earth. <3
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