in a not too distant future

Nobody calls each other “terminally online” anymore. I think that’s because everyone is terminally online now. Jobless too. And ugly as fuck. Stains all over our shirts. Stupid as well

The “Thunk” will always kill me.

14/10 doing his best

After a 5 year hiatus, national embarrassment Conor McGregor debuts in his own mma tournament called World's Baddest Man and his very first move is to blow out his knee and collapse to the ground

Reblog to turn Conor McGregor into a horse

many women are excited to get old and weird, but i have great news that it's fully possible to become weird now, before you get old. just imagine the heights of weirdness you will be able to reach in fifty years if you get started now. that's what I think

what is THE worst thing you've ever drank. all liquids acceptable. please tell me what it was, bonus points for why

Hairspray and the Shape of Water both take place in circa 1962 Baltimore and I absolutely think of the events of the two happening simultaneously

♪ Good morning Baltimore! There’s the fish man who lives next door. There’s the lady who rides the bus. I think they’re boning but I won’t judge. Good morning Baaaaaaaaltimore…. ♪

In my next life I will be reborn as #jesus fucking christ.

here’s my pitch for next doctor who. budget of 5 cents and a dream. a female doctor with female companions and a female master. they will all get horrendously gay for each other. we will make 5 billion dollars. bbc please hire me.