in a not too distant future

Frequently pronounces video games as “Blideo Bames”

Will often say “I need help passing this level it’s really hard” then when you look at their screen it’s running Microsoft Excel 2007

They invite you over to their place to check out their game collection and it’s just every season of Frasier (still impressive)

Their Xbox One is actually a series of tissue boxes glued together with the word “NINTEMDO” painted over it

When you ask their favourite video game they respond by doing a series of skillful backflips, temporarily distracting you from having asked the question in the first place

hour 6: if youu go to the store and buy groceriers you are a piece of shit

* Do Men Ever Visit Boston (ranks of nobility)

* Daring Kings Play Chess On Grand Scales (Taxonomy)

* Every Good Boy Deserves Fudge (Treble clef lines)

* King Henry Died By Drinking Chocolate Milk (metric measurements)

* My Very Elegant Mother Just Served Us Nine Pizzas (pre 2006 planets)

* Never Eat Shredded Wheat (cardinal directions)

* Nuclear Restrictions Constrain Fishing and Sailing, People Say (marine right of way)

* Please Excuse My Dear Aunt Sally (order of operations)

* Richard Of York Gave Battle In Vain (colors of the rainbow)

* Some Lovers Try Positions That They Can’t Handle (bones in the wrist)

* “OP, how could you leave out [X]!”

* see results

It didn’t take long but it felt like some tiny bit of good to do. Pit the corporations against this shit, they have far more power than I ever will. Just a thing for spare time if you feel the need to DO something but can’t find a way. Worked for me at least.

If you do- Be polite, send nothing that police could call a threat, and maybe remind them that Flock has been caught using these to spy on children and such. Why would anyone take their family to a big corporate owned restaurant when that’s happening? Things like that.