Lemon.Boy

It rises slow,

like a storm pretending to be sunrise,

a warmth that feels borrowed

from something I shouldn’t touch.

Then the lift hits —

sharp, metallic, undeniable —

and suddenly my thoughts ignite

like wires sparking in a dark room.

Everything is possible,

and that’s the part that scares me.

The world tilts brighter

than any sane sky should allow.

My pulse becomes a warning siren

I mistake for a song.

I move too fast,

talk like I’m outrunning shadows,

laugh like I’m daring the dark

to catch me.

There’s a sweetness to the rush,

but it’s the sweetness of overripe fruit,

the kind that hides rot beneath the skin.

I taste it anyway.

I always do.

And in the height of it —

that dizzy, glittering height —

I feel the ground loosening its claim on me,

as if gravity itself is stepping back

to watch what happens next.

The light is beautiful.

The light is wrong.

The light has teeth.

Still, I breathe it in,

knowing the fall will come,

knowing it always does,

but for now

I’m burning too brightly

The ghost of you has grown so thin,

A faded sketch on weathered skin,

But still, you find a way to grate—

To stir the embers of a hate

That should have turned to ash by now,

Beneath the weight of time and vow.

​I found you late, a jagged piece

Of a puzzle seeking some release,

And then you left before the glue

Could hold the shape of me and you.

You skipped the end, you missed the cost,

And left me tethered to the lost.

​It feels like rot to hold this flame,

To curse a stone, to spit a name

That everyone speaks soft and low,

As if the dead can only grow

Into the saints they never were—

While I am trapped within the blur.

​How dare I rage at quiet bones?

At empty rooms and silent phones?

There is a guilt that tastes like rust

For grinding down your memory’s dust,

For being angry you aren't here

To face the mess, the hurt, the fear.

​I’m sorry that I’m furious still,

Climbing this bitter, lonely hill.

It’s a hollow sort of misery

To fight a man who’s history,

To love you while I wish you’d stayed