Reid: I read this fascinating study on how a body decomposes and-

Emily: One day I’ll be famous and you’ll all be sorry.

JJ: The only fame you’ll ever see is when the media shows your picture as “this woman is highly dangerous” and “last seen escaping police custody”

Emily: I don’t have emotions.

JJ: You cried watching Up.

Emily: I have the perfect murder plan.

Reid: Technically no murder plan is perfect, all serial killers usually get caught.

Emily: No one cares Reid, now on with my plan.

Morgan: How many people?

Emily: What?

Morgan: How many people are you planning on killing?

Emily: I don’t know I didn’t get that far, I said I had the perfect murder plan not my kill count.

Morgan: Fair.

Emily: Okay so for the plan, I read somewhere that some land can be protected, like it can’t be tampered with or torn down. So when I kill people I’ll dig a hole and then over their body I’ll plant a tree, then the tree grows but the body under it will decompose. And legally no one can uproot the tree so the police will never find the bodies until I’m dead or long gone.

Reid: I see several flaws in tha-

Emily: When I die-

JJ: We already have a plan if that happens.

Emily: You have a plan if I die?

Morgan: Of course, so first when you get murdere-

Emily: You assume I’ll be murdered?

Morgan: Well yeah- have you met you? You’ll probably make the wrong person mad and then BAM. Murder.

Emily- Okay true, but it will probably be because I told them that I called my best friend and she told me that didn’t have permission to die that day.

Morgan: We can work with that. So the next part of the plan would be taking your body. We’ll get on a plane and then we fly to Greenland.

Emily: How are you planning on getting a body into a plane, security is pretty tight.

Morgan: A boat then, we take your body onto a boat and we sail to Greenland, we stop in the ocean a few miles from shore. We go to the ice and cut a hole in it, after that we grab your body which by this time has been wrapped in plastic, and then we shove you under the ice and leave you there.

Emily: I-I when did you come up with all of this?

Morgan: I don’t know, we’ve been talking about it while you’ve been gone.

Emily: Well know I think you’re going to be the ones that murder me.

Emily: *is sleeping*

Morgan: *goes to poke her*

Emily: *sitting calmly at the table*

Reid : *visibly shaking*

Emily: What is wrong with you?