Golden Wings

You stand there confused for a moment but you brush it off. It’s not unusual, this is how most of your conversations with him go. He always dodges questions with strange remarks. However, you still have a good relationship, maybe it’s more like a common understanding that just because you live together means you can be acquaintances without being friends.

Making friends with people isn’t really your strong suit. Mostly you feel too uncomfortable in social situations to really talk to others, and when you do start talking most people tend to stare at you as if you grew a second head. Someone once told you your sense of humour is apparently off-putting, whatever that means. Mostly you say the wrong things at the wrong time when meeting someone so you shy away from situations with strangers. 

That’s why you don’t really try too hard to get to know Jungkook. You feel it’ll only make things more awkward if he knew that his roommate is an awkward human who thinks talking about true crime is the epitome of conversation.

You head to the kitchen still in thought, and magically you’re able to make yourself coffee without burning your hand off with boiling water. It’s a real accomplishment at this time of night.

You sit on the couch for a bit, rejoicing in the silence around you before you hear the printer you were abusing finally coming to its senses and doing its job. With a sigh you place your cup in the sink and head back to your room, only to find your papers scattered across the floor as the printer keeps spitting out more. 

“Fuck” You groan out in irritation and you swear you hear a giggle coming from the room next door. 

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“He chopped up his victims and buried them in the woods near his house.” The true-crime podcast is playing in the background while you make notes. You’re up later than usual, much later, but you need to get these notes done before class tomorrow. 

You hear the front door creak open. You immediately stop what you’re doing, pausing the podcast in the process. You sit in silence waiting for the tell-tale sign of Jungkook walking to his room. The shoes he wears always make enough noise to be able to track every step. You once told him he can probably kick someone unconscious with his shoes. He only responded with a smirk. 

You don’t hear him at all and you’re getting paranoid now. Maybe listening to a true crime podcast this time of night isn’t such a good idea as you thought it would be. You take a deep breath in, deciding what to do. You reach for your phone and dial Jungkook’s number. 

He once told you that if there was ever an emergency you should call him. You scoffed at the time but now you hope that he counts a possible murderer as one of those emergencies. You press the phone to your ear but frown when you hear his ringtone blast through the apartment. You swear he is the only person you know who doesn't have his phone on silent all the time.

You get up hesitantly when he doesn't pick up. You follow his ringtone to the living room and freeze. 

There on the floor laying face down on the new rug is your roommate. You frown as the weird red tye-dye on his shirt seems to be spreading onto said rug. Your eyes grow wide as the realisation hits you. It’s not tye-dye it’s fucking blood!

You rush to his side. 

“Jungkook!” He groans, at least he is still awake, “Hey can you hear me?” 

“No.” He groans out and you would have laughed if he wasn’t currently possibly bleeding out. 

“What happened? Is there someone in the apartment?” Your frenzied mind immediately goes back to your suspicions of a murderer.

“No.” He says again and you feel a bit relieved even if he isn’t answering your first question. 

“Okay, I need you to turn around.” You try to roll him over but it’s only with his help that you manage. You never guessed all that muscle would make him this heavy. 

“Uhm okay…” Your hands hover over his torso. His entire shirt in the front is soaked with blood and he is too pale for your liking. “Okay, this is fine.” 

You pull up his shirt and gasp at the cut on his side. “Okay, maybe this is not fine.” Your breath is haggard as panic sets in, but just as it does the med-student in you take over. This is just another emergency patient right? You can treat this, you’ve done it before. Just not alone without a supervisor to step in if you mess up, and not without the proper supplies. Still, you know what to do at least.

You pull your shirt over your head and press it onto the wound, making him wince. You press down hard but realise all your supplies are in your room. 

“Okay Jungkook here.” You try to say it as calmly as possible, while you move his hand over yours. “Press hard okay.” You instruct and hope that he heard you because you’re up and running immediately. 

You fly into your room and snatch up your first aid kit before you sprint back, sliding on your knees to him in your panic. Your skin burns from the friction, but you don’t have time to look. 

You rip open your med kit and replace Jungkook’s hand on the cloth that was once your favourite baggy shirt. You cautiously lift it up and breathe out a sigh of relief when you see the bleeding has stopped. 

“You’re okay, I’m okay we are all going to be okay,” you ramble while you pack out your supplies. 

“That is very reassuring.” Jungkook jokes and you stare. 

“How can you joke right now?” You almost scream out.

Jungkook rolls his eyes. “It’s not that bad.” 

“Not that bad…are you looking at it?” Your eyes are wide while you survey his much too calm face. Why does he almost look used to this? “ Nevermind don’t look.” You’re afraid he’ll start panicking if he does.

You wet gauze with disinfectant. “ This is going to sting.” You warn him before pressing the gauze to the cut. He immediately groans and grabs your arm trying to stop you, before he realises what he’s doing and lets it go again. 

Once clean, you can get a good look at the wound. If you had to guess he tried to dodge whatever it was by turning out of the way. Clearly, it didn’t work and now you have no choice.

“It’s going to need stitches.” You bite your lip.

“Great then get on with it please.” 

“Get on with… Jungkook stitches.” You repeat yourself sure he didn’t hear. “ As in threading a needle through your skin and I don’t have any numbing agent.” 

“Is your bedside manner always this calming?” He hisses through his teeth in pain.  Your eyes are wide, and he sighs when he looks at your face. “Just do it okay, I can take it.” 

You nod and bite your lip before threading the needle. 

Throughout the procedure, he lies as still as possible but his constant wincing and the few whimpers that escape his clenched jaw give away that he is in pain. Overall you just try to work as fast as possible. For the first time, you’re glad for all the times your professor made you redo your stitches because now you at least know that you’re doing it right.

“Alright all done, let me just wrap you up.” You state after a few moments, snipping the thread. You place all your now blood soaked tools on the coffee table, you’ll clean it up later,  and come back with gauze and bandages. 

Jungkook is still breathing heavily from the stitches sitting up a bit now. As soon as you start wrapping the bandages you can’t stop your eyes from wandering. Yes, he has a nice body but the thing that makes you almost gasp is all the healed scars. The faint white lines contrast with his skin. Your curiosity about the situation is spiked.

“Ouch.” Jungkook let’s slip when you finish tying the bandage. 

“Sorry.” You apologise. For the first time, you survey him further. His torso is bruised badly, and for a moment you wonder if his ribs are damaged. His cheekbone is blossoming with purple hues and his lip is split, dried with blood. You sigh and pick up a gauze pad wetting it with the disinfectant.

“What are you doing?” Jungkook asks, leaning back until his back meets the wall while you lean forward, the gauze held up in your hand. 

“Will you please just hold still.” He hesitates long enough for you to press the gauze against his lip. 

“Ouch.” 

“Sorry.” You scoot closer to him so that you have more control and he looks at you. 

“Thank you.” He says it softy and you nod, trying not to look at his intense staring eyes, you rather concentrate on his lip, dabbing it lightly with the gauze.

“Y/n” He encases your wrist with his hand making you stop and look at him in surprise. He is frowning slightly.

“Really thank you.” His face softens as he says the words, truly meaning them. Your brain struggles to come up with a reply but your mouth is clearly not affected.

“It’s a pleasure, I’m just really glad you didn’t die. I don't know how I would have gotten rid of your body.”  You immediately mentally cringe. You always make stupid jokes like this in awkward situations. You had to learn to stop yourself for hospital practicals, but clearly, your training isn’t helping now.

Jungkook stares at you in shock and you’re just about to apologise when he starts laughing, wincing a bit but continuing. 

“Yeah, I doubt you would have been able to drag me to the woods to bury me.” His reply surprises you, most people rarely appreciate your sense of humour.

“No, I would have probably had to chop you up.” You wait for his response, you’re sure he will change the topic but he just laughs again.

“O yeah, serial killer style okay.” He nods as if in thought and you frown, laughing at the twist the conversation has taken. “I don’t think that would be the best way though.” 

“O and why not?” You have no idea why you feel defensive about the way you would dispose of a dead body.

“Because the mess would be way too much,” He says it so calmly, “Imagine the cleaning. You would definitely not get your deposit back on this place.” He grimaces at the idea and you laugh.

“You’re probably right,” You cave. “I’ll be sure to ask your advice if I ever need to hide a body.” 

“I am nothing if not helpful.” He jokes. 

You’ve never seen him smile this much, come to think of it you’ve barely seen him smile at all. It suits him, especially when his eyes crinkle up and his front teeth show the way it is doing now. 

“Jungkook?” His name calls his attention to you immediately. You know it’s probably overstepping a boundary but you just feel like you need to know. “What happened?” 

His face goes blank for a moment. He clears his throat. “ I was mugged.” 

You don’t believe him, it sounds almost practised. He also doesn’t meet your eyes completely, but overall you can’t be sure he is lying. You don't know his tells, hell you don’t even really know him. 

“I’m sorry that happened. I’m glad you’re safe.” You don’t push and you can see he appreciates it. If he was really mugged he probably doesn’t want to talk about it.

A lull falls over you two. You play with the gauze stretching it apart. You mentally chastise yourself. You just had to go and ruin the moment with your curiosity. 

“I’m sorry.” He breaks the silence.

“Huh?” You frown at him and you stare even harder when you see his cheeks becoming a pinkish shade. At least you know he has enough blood to blush. 

“I’m sorry about the rug.” He motions with his head to the big red stain on your once pretty rug. You can’t make him feel bad about it though.

“It’s okay, I like modern art anyway.” You awkwardly chuckle trying to reassure him, but when you see he is biting his lip still staring at the stain you sigh. 

“You can make it up to me okay?” You say patting his shoulder. The movement feels very weird, out of place for some reason. 

You watch his face morph into one of exhaustion very quickly. The adrenaline finally wearing off. 

“I think you should go rest.” You say in your best doctor voice. Jungkook shows no resistance and just nods before slowly getting up, wincing with every movement and holding onto his injured side but he refuses your help. 

You follow him to his room door. You worry that he’ll tear the stitches or what if you did it wrong and he bleeds out during the night? He turns around to face your anxious form. 

“I’ll be fine Y/n don’t worry.” He says as if reading your mind. 

“Call me if anything happens okay.” You get a nod in return heading to your own room, hearing his door close behind you. 

Once in the comfort of your room, you take a second to process what happened, leaning against your door and counting the events on your fingers. 

One, you had treated your first patient by yourself.

Two, unfortunately, it happened to be your mysteriously bleeding roommate at 3 in the morning, 

Three, afterwards, you had the longest and weirdest conversation you’ve ever had with him.

And four, apparently, as you move further into your room and catch sight of yourself in the mirror, you did all this in your bra.

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The morning light creeps into your room much faster than you feel necessary. Your head feels groggy as if every thought has to trek through mud to make an appearance. You rub your eyes and slowly open them, only to groan at the onslaught of the sunlight on your eyes. 

You sit on the bed for another second, before the desire for coffee drags you out of it. You swing your body to the side standing up only to stumble. Why do your knees hurt so much? 

You rack your brain for the possible reason for the bruises on them. You try to recall what happened last night before you .

You were making your notes when… o shit Jungkook.

You hurriedly walk out of your room, stopping at his door. You listen intently for any sign of him being in there, but you're only met with silence. Maybe you should go in, but you feel like that would be crossing a line, and you’re sure that if something was wrong he would have called for you. Or well you hope he would. So instead you continue to the kitchen.

Your sight is set on the coffee maker, it shines like a glowing beckon for your tired brain. You reach for it turning it on when you suddenly stop and backtrack. There on the black counter is one of your favourite cups filled with now lukewarm coffee. The coffee however isn’t what makes you smile. It’s the sticky note stuck to it. The letters were clearly written carefully, forming two words. Thank you.

You remove the neon pink note and stick it on the wall where it contrasts nicely with the white tile.

You wonder where your roommate is, it feels too quiet in the apartment for him to be home. Usually, there would be noise coming from his room. Games or something, but now there is absolute silence, which means he’s probably not home. You know he didn’t die through the night though because the coffee isn’t cold, so there is that to at least calm your anxious mind. You just hope that wherever he is, he is not tearing his stitches.

You take a sip of the coffee and wrinkle your nose at the bitter liquid. You can’t blame him that he doesn’t know to put sugar in your coffee. You drink it nonetheless, you can’t have the gesture go to waste. 

You smile as you catch sight of the note again, picking up a sticky note, from the pile you usually use for grocery lists you write a quick “my pleasure” on it. Something feels missing though, so without thinking about it twice you add a small “Don’t die” at the bottom, hoping he would appreciate it. You stick it on his bedroom door to make sure he sees it as you head past to get dressed because you just realised that you are late, very late. 

You don’t think you’ve ever gotten ready so fast. Your exciting 3 am seemed to have impacted your sleep a little bit too much and now you’re going to be late for class if you don’t leave. You barely remember to lock the door. Your last thought before you rush to the elevator is that Jungkook better not bleed out through the day.

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“No mom I’m fine, I just had a bad day.” You have your phone pressed between your ear and your shoulder as you talk to your mom while walking through the aisles of the convenience store. 

“No, there is nothing you can do mom, I’m just getting chocolate, and then heading home.” You bend down finally finding what you were looking for. 

You had a very bad day, classes have been killing you inside, and today of all days your professor just had to call on you with a question you didn’t know the answer to. The embarrassment and your group’s decision to work on an assignment till late have mixed together to make you feel drained and just completely over today. 

“Yeah, I’ll be safe,” You pack your things on the counter for the cashier to ring up. “Okay love you too.” You finally hang up. You don’t know how your mom just knew to call you but hearing her voice made you feel better. 

“Bad day?” The man asks you while packing everything into a bag for you.

“That obvious huh?” You ask handing over the money. 

“The amount of chocolate might have given it away.” He smiles and you blush and nod taking the bag that he hands over. 

“Hey if you’re not busy later,” He continues before you can leave. “Maybe I can try to make your day better.” 

You stare at him shocked, did he just ask you out on a date? 

“O, uhm…” You’re not sure what to say, obviously you don’t want to go out with him but you don’t know how to turn him down. 

“It’s alright I think the uhm… chocolate will do the job.” You say awkwardly, “Besides I can’t tell if you're an axe murderer.” He stares at you and you cringe inwardly, that might not have been the best way to turn him down. You guess after all the joking with Jungkook you forgot how people react when you say things like that. 

So leaving the situation you turn and walk out the door without waiting to see if he’ll reply. 

Blushing hard you walk down the street. How do some people react so well to your humour and others just don’t? Or well you guess only one person reacts well. But you mean you do have a point, he could be a serial killer or something, maybe it just wasn’t the best thing to say it out loud, to his face.

It’s already dark, but your apartment is only a block away so you decide to just walk instead of waiting for a bus. It’s a nice night out, not too hot or cold and the fresh air isn’t something you get enough of, so you continue down the street. 

There aren’t many people out and soon a strange feeling of being watched takes over you. You turn around to look behind you but there is only a couple following you down the sidewalk. You breathe out, nothing to worry about. That is until they cross the street and the sound of footsteps behind you makes you aware of someone else following you. 

Just relax Y/n it’s probably just another person like you walking home, you’re just being paranoid, that’s all, you try to convince yourself. But the feeling of being watched doesn’t disappear and you start walking faster. Your heart rate speeds up when the footsteps start becoming faster as well. You refuse to look back and let the person know you’re aware of them so you keep your head down and walk even faster. The footsteps are closer now and you can see an alley coming up. You’re just about to make a run for it across the street not caring if you’re jaywalking or looking foolish when a figure comes out of nowhere from the side. 

You freeze in fear but when the light falls over the stranger's face you relax. It’s Jungkook. 

“Hey what are you doing here?” You ask breathing out a sigh of relief and look back over your shoulder only to see the man that was walking behind you cross the street.

“I uh… got off of work early and saw you walking so I thought I’d join you,” Jungkook replies following the man with his eyes before he smiles and takes the bag out of your hand and carries it for you. 

“O, well thank you.” You say falling into step beside him.

“Did you do grocery shopping?” He peeks into the bag and immediately starts laughing. “I guess not.” He chuckles.

“I had a bad day okay,” You go to rip the bag from his hand but he moves it out of your grasp, swatting away your hand. 

“So your reaction is to buy half of the store’s chocolate?” He teases, smiling at you. 

You cross your arms over your chest defensively. “Yes, it is a coping mechanism.”

He just giggles and the sound makes you stare at him, you’ve never heard him giggle before and it almost makes you want to laugh. You survey the way he’s limping a bit to the side of his injury making a mental note to check on it.

“I’m glad to see you’re still alive.” You state without thinking and he frowns for a second before realisation seems to dawn on him and he nods. 

“I was planning on dying but then I saw your note and decided against it.” He smiles referring to the sticky note you left him. “I didn’t want to disobey my doctor’s orders.”

“Good, because that would really have tainted my reputation,” You state straight-faced, “ letting someone die before even graduating imagine.”

“Yeah, that would have been bad for you.” He agrees nodding profusely causing you to chuckle. 

You fall into silence, and you breathe in the fresh air deeply, glad that he showed up so you don’t have to be so paranoid. 

“Y/n.” He breaks the silence with a serious tone of voice. You look at him, his face is just as serious as his voice. “You shouldn’t be walking alone.” 

You sigh. “I know I just really wanted chocolate.” You try to justify your actions even if the excuse sounds lame to your own ears.

“Next time, call me okay,” You frown at him unsure of what he’s saying. “I’ll bring you chocolate.” 

You’re taken aback by his words. He’s offering to bring you chocolate so that you don’t have to walk at night? 

“I’ll keep that in mind.” You mumble not knowing what else to say. You didn’t expect him to say something like that, you guess maybe the fact that you two seemed to be able to have a whole conversation made it easier for him to talk to you or maybe it made it easier for you. He does seem much more approachable than he use to. He always came across as cold, but now you guess you’re seeing his true personality coming out to you and you like it, or maybe he hit his head last night as well.

“I’m sorry you had a bad day.” He tries to keep the conversation going and you look at him in surprise. Jip, he definitely hit his head. But you don’t want to be rude so you answer.

“It’s okay.” 

You reach your apartment door without saying another word, but the silence wasn’t awkward like you expected it was more like a comfortable one. 

“Careful,” he muses when walking into the apartment, “The rug is wet.” He says it almost sheepishly but plays it off as nonchalantly as he can.

You look down to find the rug wet and the bloodstain now a mere trace of pink. 

“You cleaned it?” You say in wonder, stepping over it so as not to get your socks wet. 

“Yeah I know you said you like modern art but I assumed you were joking.” He puts the bag down on the counter. “Unless you weren’t in which case I can bleed on it again.” 

You laugh at his serious face and it morphs into a smile. 

“That’s okay.” You giggle, before saying very seriously, “Please don’t do that.” He nods. 

You survey the way he is standing gripping onto his side.

“How are you doing? With the injury and all?” You ask trying to tread lightly in case he becomes defensive like some people do when asked.

To your surprise, he grimaces, “I was hoping you could maybe take a look at it?” 

“Yeah of course.” You nod a bit flattered that he asked. 

You lead him to the bathroom and instruct him to stand by the sink, that way you can easily throw the dirty gauze somewhere other than the coffee table. 

“Uhm you have to take off your shirt.” You say awkwardly, fidgeting in your med kit even though you already have the supplies you need in hand.

You see movement in your peripheral vision and you turn around, blushing a bit at the sight of him without a shirt. Of course, you’ve always known he’s handsome. When you first met him you thought he must be some kind of demigod, with his sharp jawline and pretty eyes, so seeing him now you gulp. You saw him without a shirt last night but that was while you were panicking. Now it takes a moment for your brain to stop going haywire. 

“Right uhm…” You clear your throat and the ghost of a smirk crosses his face. 

“Aren’t you going to take yours off again?” He teases and your blush deepens, burning your cheeks.

“O uhm…” You stammer over your words. 

 “I’m joking, I know it was because you needed to stop the bleeding,” he reassures you, poking you on the nose and bending down a bit to look you in the eye. “Stop blushing.” He adds when he sees how flustered you look.

“It’s not really something I can control.” You mumble and unwrap his bandages. You’re very close to him, you can feel his body heat radiating off of him and you can’t help but wonder if he has a fever.

“You’re really hot.” You say without thinking and he stares at you in surprise lifting an eyebrow at your statement before you realise what you said. “I didn’t mean…uhm you feel warm, I’m scared you may have a fever.” You stammer to try and explain yourself.

“No don’t worry I usually run warm.” He says to calm you down and you just nod, sticking a thermometer in his mouth anyway even if it just to keep him from teasing you any further. 

You can feel his eyes on you as you check his stitches. They are still intact so you can stop worrying about that at least. You disinfect the wound again before putting on the fresh dressing. 

The beeping of the thermometer comes and a moment later he’s handing it to you. 

“See no fever.” He triumphantly states and you look at the normal temperature flashing on the device. 

“Well, then I guess…” You’re cut off by his phone ringing and he immediately picks it up.

“Yeah Hyung.” He answers and you turn away to put everything back into your medkit. 

“I know I’m sorry but it was an emergency.” You frown. You don’t mean to eavesdrop but it’s kind of hard not to when he’s standing right next to you. 

“I’ll be right there,” He nods while the person on the phone continues to speak. He moves to the side to give you access to the sink and you remove the gauze from it, to throw it away. “Yeah okay bye.” He hangs up. 

“I have to go.” He states and you frown. 

“I thought you were off tonight?” You remember he said that when he joined you on the street. 

“Yeah but uhm… something came up, they need my help.” He pulls his shirt over his head again, letting a hiss through his teeth at the movement. 

“O okay.” You don’t know what you were expecting. Him to be home tonight and what? You two sitting on the couch watching a movie or something? That is absurd. Just because you’re talking doesn’t mean you’re suddenly friends. 

“Thank you for this.” He gestures to the medkit and you nod before he hastily leaves the bathroom. A few seconds later you hear the front door close, the “my pleasure” still on your tongue.

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The heart is enclosed in the pericardium, which’s main function is to protect it and prevent it from over-expanding. The pericardium is 

“Take that Jungkook!“

The pericardium is attached to the diaphragm and inner surface 

“I will end you Jimin!” 

The inner surface of the 

“Listen you little fuckers I am the king you will tremble before me.” 

Of the 

“Taehyung that’s cheating.” 

The 

“Ha, you losers I win again!” 

“The sternum!” You finally snap. You’re trying to study but you’ve been on the same paragraph for the last 20 minutes. You push your chair back from the desk, the wheels scrapping on the floor due to the speed. 

You can still hear them shouting at each other as you stomp down the hallway. 

You know they’re playing a video game. Jungkook moved his gaming system out of his room a few weeks ago because according to him the wifi is better in the living room. 

You round the corner only to find the three on the carpet. On the screen Taehyung’s name is on top of the board, the other two’s names following. Jimin is on Jungkook’s back, who is trying to strangle Taehyung. The scene may look scary but you roll your eyes. They do this all the time. 

The first time you walked out of your room to find two strangers on your couch you almost had a heart attack, but Jimin and Taehyung made a big fuss about how they finally get to meet Jungkook’s roommate. Apparently according to them Jungkook has been talking about you a lot. Jungkook obviously denied it, to his hyungs amusement.

Since then Jungkook’s friends seem to be here every day. Jimin and Taehyung could basically be living here but Hoseok sometimes drops by too. You know there are others you haven’t met yet because you picked up on the same names mentioned often. You would ask why you haven’t met them if you didn’t already have your hands full with the two currently trying to beat up your roommate. 

“Hey, guys?” Your voice makes them freeze, all three heads snapping to you. With their eyes on you now, you lose a bit of your fire. Surprisingly you’re more comfortable with them than most people, probably due to the close proximity, but sometimes when all three very handsome men look at you, you end up flustered. Unfortunately for you that seems to happen quite often seeing as you have been spending more time with Jungkook, which also means spending time with his friends.

“If you want to kill each other, do it somewhere else, please.” You roll your eyes, playing off your shyness by walking past them, feigning disinterest. 

“Sorry Y/n” Jimin laughs, getting up from the carpet, and joining you in the kitchen before Taehyung or Jungkook can even move. 

“Were you studying?” He asks, sitting on the counter and watching you make coffee for yourself. 

“Yeah, I was.” You rub your eyes until you see stars, your eyes burning from looking at your laptop for so long.

“What were you studying?” Taehyung leans next to Jimin making sure you pay attention to both of them. 

“The heart.” You don’t know why they both look at Jungkook who is leaning on the back of the couch watching you three before answering. 

“O well I can’t help you with matters of the heart.” Jimin states and you frown, you didn’t think he would be able to help you. 

“I can however help you with something else that doesn’t require the heart.” He smirks at you and your eyes widen at his suggestive sentence, you still can’t get used to Jimin’s casual flirty personality. 

“Hyung.” Jungkook’s voice is deep and the way he says it sounds like a warning. 

“I’m only joking Kookie,” Jimin and Taehyung smirk at the younger boy and Jungkook glares at them before rolling his eyes.

You look away from whatever is happening there and instead look at the now dubbed sticky note wall. 

It started with Jungkook’s thank you note and evolved from there. Now, whenever you leave, you leave the other a note, usually including a ridiculous reminder like don’t die, watch out for cannibals, don’t step into fairy rings. Stupid stuff like that. You both get teased by Jimin and Taehyung about it, but neither of you have stopped. Maybe the smile that adorns your lips every time you find a note stuck to the door or a coffee cup, if it’s in the morning, makes you ignore the teasing. In your defence, Jungkook doesn’t seem deterred by it either.

“Well, I’m going back to studying, try and keep it down okay.” You declare to the three, who were unbeknownst to you having a whole non-verbal conversation. You take your coffee cup and walk back down the hallway. 

“Y/n” You backtrack at your name being called. 

“Yes, Jungkook.” You wait for him to say something, staring at him, and he just stares back at you for a moment before looking away and clearing his throat.

“Uhm…” He looks to his hyungs standing in the kitchen observing him. “Enjoy your studying.” He looks like he wants to kick himself, but you do not have time to dwell on it now. 

“Thanks?” You tilt your head in confusion, getting a nod in return and walking to your room to finally finish the stupid heart, having to ignore the way yours is pounding from Jungkook’s eyes on you. 

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.

“That test was so easy. If anyone does badly they really shouldn’t be studying medicine.” Becky boasts walking next to you. 

You wish she would disappear and go bother someone else but she clearly can’t take a hint. The test she is referring to was actually hard for you and now her words are starting to make you feel worse than you did when you were struggling through it. You shrink into yourself chewing on your lip. 

She’s the type of person who does well in everything and likes gloating about it. She somehow decided that you were her friend and now you have to suffer through her long rants about how perfect she is and how everyone else isn’t, including you. 

“O my god.” She suddenly interrupts herself and you look up wanting to see what caused it. “Who is he?” she asks and you frown in confusion following her gaze only to land on Jungkook. 

He’s leaning on the wall next to the gate of the university talking on his phone. He’s dressed in all black as usual and his hair is falling into his face a bit. You understand why she reacted the way she did because he looks extremely hot, and not in the having-a-fever kind of way. 

“He looks like he was sculpted by the gods wow.” Becky continues gushing. “Do you think I should ask for his number?” 

“No.” The word escapes your mouth before you can stop it. For some reason, the thought of her asking out your roommate and him agreeing irks you a lot more than you thought it would. You’re sure it’s just because it’s Becky but the more you think about it the more it bothers you. 

Becky however didn’t seem to hear you or maybe she is just ignoring you. 

“I think I should.” She continues and you can feel yourself getting angry. “See he’s walking this way.” She sounds giddy about it, sure that he must have noticed her.

Jungkook, who hung up his call when he noticed you, is walking towards you two his smile fading when he sees the look on your face.

“Hi?” He phrases it like a question not sure why you’re looking like you want to murder someone. 

“H…” You respond before getting cut off.

“Hey, my name is Becky.” She flips her hair over her shoulder and smiles at him.

“Yeah, uhm… hi.” He frowns and her smile falters.  “I came to walk you home since it’s almost dark.” He explains himself to you turning away from the now seething girl. 

“O, thank you.” You smile, feeling a little smug when you see the shocked expression on Becky’s face. He’s just about to reply when Becky worms her way in between you two again.

“O do you know her?” Her voice is high and she giggles, you roll your eyes. “We’re like best friends, I’m sure she must have mentioned me.” 

“Not really.” Jungkook raises an eyebrow at her and for the first time, you see him getting irritated. His eyes go narrow and he sucks in his cheeks a bit staring at her. She shrinks under the stare. 

You’ve never understood why Jimin and Tae said that people are intimidated by Jungkook but now you do. You feel bad for Becky because you know under that stare you would be running for the hills. So you step in.

“Becky I’ll see you on Monday okay.” You step around her and take Jungkook by the arm pulling him away, leaving Becky speechless probably for the first time in her life. 

You walk fast to get away from the awkward situation. 

“Sorry about her, she’s just uhm…” You try to make an excuse for her, not really sure why you are trying to do so. 

“Spoilt?” Jungkook offers and you laugh and nod.

“Basically yeah.” That’s definitely one way to describe her.

 “Thank you for coming to pick me up.” You steer the conversation away from talking about her. 

“No problem, I didn’t want you walking in the dark.” His calm and smiley demeanor is back and you breath a sigh of relief.

You walk beside him in silence for a moment. You just can’t seem to shake Becky’s words, she makes you feel so inadequate most of the time. 

“So how was the test?” He asks pushing you to the side so that he can walk closest to the road. 

You groan and he looks at you, worried. 

“It was awful and she said it was so easy, you know which just makes me think well, that I’m not good enough.” You don’t know why you’re pouring your heart out but right now you just need someone to listen and recently that someone has become Jungkook.

“Wow wait.” Jungkook stops walking causing you to do the same. He places his hands on your shoulders forcing you to face him. “Y/n, you saved my life, stayed calm and stitched me up, not to mention all the times you’ve had to treat me since.” He’s right, he’s probably the clumsiest person you’ve ever met. Always coming home with bruises or cuts. 

“I’m sure she’s never done that.” He continues, pushing your head up to look at him with a finger underneath your chin. “You are going to be a great doctor.” His face is serious but he gives you a light smile when you nod.

“Thank you Jungkook.” You smile at him, feeling better after the pep talk. 

“What are friends for right.” He smiles again, using his one hand still on your shoulder to take your bag off of it. He flings it over his shoulder instead and starts walking again, and you follow. 

It’s the first time you’ve heard him actually say that you two are friends, it makes you glad to know he feels as close to you as you do to him. The space that was there for the first six months of him living with you is now completely gone, erased by the weeks you’ve been spending time together. 

“Does she do that often?” He wonders out loud and you know what he’s referring to.

“Yeah sometimes.” You admit looking to the side ashamed to admit how you let her get to you. 

“Do you want me to kill her?” He says it with such a serious tone that you laugh at him. 

“No, I think I’ll do it if it gets too much.” You joke and after a moment he laughs. 

“And how would you dispose of her body hm?” He keeps the joke going and you pretend to think, placing your finger to your chin and tilting your head up. 

“I’ll get you to do it for me.” You declare pointing to him. He laughs shaking his head. 

“No, your kill, your responsibility.” He says and you pout. 

“That’s not fair.” The running joke of you finding a way to hide a body has been going on since the night of him almost bleeding out. You’ve been bringing up ways randomly but he shoots them down every time. 

“How about a woodchipper?” You ask, already expecting his head to shake. 

“Wouldn’t work, you know how strong a human body is, it’ll only cause a mess, and leave too much evidence.” He explains and you groan. 

“How do you know all this?” You ask, glaring at him in feigned suspicion. 

“Call it an educated guess.” He smiles and nudges you only to pull you out of the way of a pole a second later because you were still staring at him. 

“I think you spend too much time thinking about this.” You huff, crossing your arms across your chest. 

“Like you don’t.” He retorts and you gasp.

“Only because of you.” You exclaim, throwing your hands up.

“Besides,” he continues, “It’s fun to see your reaction when you're wrong, you don’t like being wrong.” he elaborates.

You pout again. “Does anyone?” You glare at him but he laughs at you. 

“I guess not no.” He relents and you smile. 

You look at him waiting for him to say something. You marvel in the way the last rays of sunshine bounces off his dark hair, painting his facial features in a soft glow.

He looks at you suddenly, you gasp and look away embarrassed at being caught staring at him. He chuckles and you cringe, looking down as you walk.

“Y/n?” He asks and you look at him only to find him not next to you but behind you standing still. “Where are you going?” he chuckles and you blush when you realise you just walked past your apartment building too busy chastising yourself for staring at him.

“O right.” you chuckle, trying to hide your blush from him. 

He opens the building door for you and you enter. 

“I was thinking we could watch…” You trail off when you realise he isn’t following you in.

“You’re not coming up?” You guess and he rubs the back of his neck awkwardly.

“I have to go, sorry.” He apologises but you nod taking your bag from him. 

He always has to leave, you’d think you’d be used to it by now but you always find yourself feeling disappointed because you can’t spend more time together. It’s a new feeling for you, being upset because you can’t spend time with someone. Usually, you’re upset when you have to. 

“Okay, be safe.” You say sheepishly. 

“Thanks, we can watch whatever you were going to say next time okay?” You nod and he walks off.

You stand there a minute looking at his retreating back before you turn to the elevator. 

The elevator takes forever and when it finally does arrive you are horrified at what you find inside. 

A stranger. 

Shyly you walk in. 

“What floor?” The man asks and you press your floor button instead of answering. 

“Hi, I’m Damion.” You sigh, he’s the type to talk in elevators then. 

“I’m Y/n.” You mumble, but he caught it. 

“Hello Y/n, I’m new to the building, maybe you can show me around some time?” He says and his straightforwardness catches you off guard. 

“O uhm…” You rack your brain for an excuse, wishing for the elevator to speed up. “I would but I’m very busy maybe you should ask someone else.” 

“It’s alright I’ll wait for when you have time, Y/n.” He says confidently. You know he is just being persistent but for some reason the way he says your name gives you a bad feeling. 

You’re saved from answering by the doors opening on your floor. 

“Goodnight.” You say and try to rush out of the elevator away from him, but he grabs your arm stopping you. Your eyes grow wide and you look down at the hand encasing your wrist.

“See you around.” He says and lets you go, with a smile. 

You immediately run out and only let out a sigh of relief when you lock your apartment door behind you. You shudder when you remember his gaze on you but it’s quickly pushed from your mind when your eyes land on the sticky note stuck to the door. 

“Enjoy your evening, try not to get kidnapped by elves.” You laugh and stick it to the sticky note wall. 

By the time you get into bed, the only memories playing in your head are of Jungkook’s face as he laughs. Your creepy neighbour is pushed from your mind. 

.

.

.

Your back is killing you. You woke up seconds ago and found yourself not on your comfy bed but rather on your desk chair. You feel something sticking to your face and you wipe at it lazy. One of your pages of notes floats down onto the desk and you sigh. You haven’t slept more than five hours in the past three days and you can feel your head pounding from the lack of sleep. The past few weeks have been a blur of tests and classes so you haven’t had a day off. You look at your phone to find a few missed calls from your mom. You’ll have to call her back later after you’ve had coffee.

You slowly get up, stumbling a bit and having to support yourself on the wall. That’s how you walk to the kitchen leaning on the wall the entire time. You miss the three heads that turn to you, too focused on trying to keep yourself upright. 

“Morning.” Jungkook’s voice breaks through the muddled thoughts in your brain. You groan in response, leaning against the counter to try and catch your breath. Was the walk to the kitchen always this tiring?

“Are you making coffee? ” Taehyung asks getting up from his spot on the couch, eager for a cup of his own. 

“Yeah just give me a second.” You reply working up the courage to walk to the coffee maker a few steps away. You feel very dizzy. 

“Hey, are you okay?” Taehyung asks, stepping closer to get a look at your very pale face. 

“I’m fine.” No, you’re not but non the less you still have some studying to do and you have class in an hour. So you push away from the counter but as soon as you do you stumble and everything goes a bit hazy for a second. 

“Wow okay.” Taehyung rights you with a very worried look on his face, the other two have stopped their game and are now staring at you in worry. 

Jungkook jumps over the back of the couch and makes his way to you, replacing Tae’s arm around you. He is frowning at you and places his hand on your forehead. 

“Holly shit Y/n you have a fever.” He exclaims, but you groan at the information. 

“No I can’t have a fever,” You push away from him but immediately almost fall over, being caught again by Jungkook. 

“Y/n I think you’re sick,” Jungkook says softly and you shake your head.

“I can’t be sick,” You feel like crying, “I have a class to get to.” You’re in denial, you know you’re sick but being sick right now is a big inconvenience. Becky has been boasting about how much she is studying and how prepared she is for the tests, you’ve been trying to keep up.

“Hey come on,” Taehyung says. “ Jungkook why don’t you help her sit down and I’ll make her some tea.” You still shake your head but gasp in surprise when you’re lifted off the floor by Jungkook. He carries you bridal style to the couch and gently puts you down where Jimin has made room for you. 

“I can’t guys I have to go to class.” You protest making to get up again but you’re held down by Jungkook’s hands. 

“Y/n your sick, you’re not going to class.” Jungkook orders. Why is his doctor’s voice better than yours? 

“I’m fine okay, let me go.” You remove his hands from your shoulder. 

“Clearly.” Jimin pipes up and you glare at him. “All I’m saying is, that if you go to class you’ll probably pass out along the way, and what then?” 

“Then Jungkook will have to put his body hiding skills to work.” You state. The other two frown in confusion at Jungkook but he just shakes his head. 

“I can’t do that, it’ll be too noticeable if I’m seen carrying you off of the street,” He smiles at you, leans in and tilts his head to the side a bit, “Too risky you know?” He whispers, and you look up at him, he’s frowning slightly at you in worry. You’ve gotten closer to Jungkook than you would have ever thought possible. He’s become a constant in your life like you never thought you’d experience and definitely not with your once elusive roommate. He’s the one you run to after a bad day and he always listens intently to your rants 

“Besides what is going to happen if you miss one class?” Taehyung asks, making you tear your gaze away from Jungkook as Tae hands you a cup of tea that you wrinkle your nose at.

“I don’t know I’ve never missed a class.” You say frowning at the shocked expression on their faces. 

“You’ve never missed a class?” Jimin asks in disbelief and you nod. 

“Wow, just wow.” Taehyung shakes his head. 

“Then I feel like this is a good excuse to miss one,” Jungkook states and pushes the cup of tea closer to your face, prompting you to drink but you grimace and shake your head. 

“I have to go Jungkook.” You fight back. “I won’t be able to stand her if I miss a class and get a bad mark.”

“Who?” Taehyung frowns but Jungkook nods already knowing who you’re talking about.

“Is that why you’ve been overworking yourself?” He asks in concern and you nod your head slowly, looking away from him. 

“Y/n,” Jungkook kneels in front of you so you're at eye level. “ You can’t let her get to you, you know she’s just trying to tear you down.” 

“I know but still…” You trail off unsure how to voice your thoughts. 

“Tell you what if you promise to stay home and rest,” Jungkook empathizes the last word, “ Then I’ll help you study okay?” 

“We’ll help you study.” Jimin corrects him, already disliking whoever it is that is making you feel inferior.

“Sounds like a bad bargain.” You reply and cross your arms, but you know there is no getting out of it. 

You know Jungkook well enough by now to know that when he puts his mind to something there is no turning back. You once saw him try to fit a whole orange in his mouth because Hobi dared him to. And if you’re honest with yourself even though you know that they won’t be able to help you study the fact that they offered to makes you feel all warm inside.

They all hold their breath ready to fight more but you sigh, leaning back onto the couch. 

“Fine.” Is all you say and they relax. 

“Keep an eye on her in case she makes a run for it.” Jungkook jokes poking your nose, before getting up. 

“Yeah like she’ll be able to run in her condition,” Taehyung replies sitting down on the couch next to you.

You look around the room. Your apartment has become if you had to describe it, lively. Before the “shared” space in the apartment was clean and cold but since you and Jungkook have become closer the space shows that two people live here. Your textbooks and cups are on the coffee table where you were making notes while he played games, and two of his hoodies are thrown into the blanket basket because he was too lazy to put them away. The blanket that Jimin throws over your shoulders also belongs to Jungkook. It’s a thick fluffy blanket that you’ve been stealing from his room to lay on the couch with since you found out it existed. After a while, he just stopped taking it back to his room. 

“Here you go.” Jungkook kneels in front of you with freshly made coffee, that you eagerly exchange the cup of tea for. He chuckles and place the cup of tea on the coffee table. You wonder how he knew to make you coffee. 

“Thank you.” You clutch onto the warm cup and sink further into the couch. Jungkook sits down beside you and Taehyung takes a spot on the floor picking up the controllers they abandoned, and handing it back to them.  

They continue playing their game, on a much lower volume, while you slowly drink your coffee. It’s black coffee. You used to drink it with milk and sugar but every time Jungkook made you coffee he made it black. At first, you didn’t want to say anything feeling too awkward but now you actually prefer it the way he makes it.

You never thought you would be this comfortable with people around in your apartment but their presence is soothing. You guess you’ve never realised how lonely you were before, now you recognise when they’re not here and especially at night when Jungkook is gone you can feel his absence. You still don’t like being around people but maybe the man sitting next to you checking every few minutes if you’re okay, putting his hand on your forehead to check your fever, is the exception. 

The warm drink and background noise of the game and their voices are lulling you to sleep. You feel one of them remove the coffee cup from your hand as you fall to the side, onto Jungkook, your tired body finally finding the time to rest, and recover.

You wake up a few hours later. Your head feels foggy, your entire body hurts and you feel all hot and cold at the same time. You hear a voice coming from somewhere but they’re not talking to you so you keep your eyes closed and try to make out what is being said. 

Jungkook is speaking in a hushed voice probably to try and not wake you. “I know hyung but I can’t just leave her.” You frown, is he talking about you? 

“Jimin and Tae said they’ll take over for me today.” You can hear him pacing while he hums in acknowledgement at whatever the other person is saying.  “Thank you hyung, will you ask Jin-hyung about the food?” You are getting very hot now, it’s like a hot tingle traveling through your body and you kick the blanket off you, sighing at the rush op cold air that envelops you. 

“Hey,” Jungkook’s voice is right beside you, “you awake?” You must have not heard him hang up the call.  

You slowly open your eyes, and you're met with his worried face. His hair is disheveled as if he has been tugging at it and in your fever hazed mind you reach out a hand to flatten it. He doesn’t acknowledge it and instead puts his hand on your forehead. 

“You’re still very hot.” He frowns and bites his lip in worry but you laugh. 

“Good to know I still got it.” You joke, but the words hurt your dry throat. 

He picks up a glass of water on the coffee table that he must have put there earlier and hands it to you. “You have to drink all of this okay?” He gives you a stern look. 

“Okay doctor.” You sass but take the glass anyway and start sipping. As soon as the water touches your lips however you can’t stop drinking, realising how thirsty you actually are, you gulp down the whole glass. 

Jungkook stares at you in surprise. “Wow do you want some more?” 

“No thank you, I think I’ll be okay.” You smile and readjust yourself to sit up. 

Jungkook sticks his hand out stopping you. “Wait I don’t think you should get up just yet.” 

You shake his hand off. “I’m fine Jungkook.” You roll your eyes at him and sit up. “see I’m completely fine I can even,” You stand up, but as soon as you’re up you see stars, your vision goes black and you fall into Jungkook’s arms. 

“Maybe you shouldn’t do that yeah?” He laughs and you hit him playfully in the chest. “Don’t laugh.” 

“How can I not when you’re being so stubborn.” He puts you back onto the couch and you pout.

“Don’t pout.” He smiles but you only pout more causing him to laugh. “You’re cute when you’re  sick,” he teases and you look away from him crossing your arms. 

“I’m not that sick.” You retort but you know you’re lying. Your head is pounding and everything hurts. 

“Well in that case I’ll just return all this medicine that I got,” you nod and he gets up walking away but then he turns back, “ and I guess all the chocolates too.” 

You swing around to look at him. He’s already smirking at you, getting the reaction he clearly wanted from you. 

“You got chocolate?” You glare at him in suspicion. 

“Yes and you can have some,” You smile wide but he holds up a finger, “after you eat some food.” 

“Chocolate is food.” You retrot. Even though the thought of chocolate is alluring, the thought of food makes you feel nauseous. 

Jungkook shakes his head crossing his arms over his chest, but just as he wants to reply there is a knock at the door. 

You frown in confusion but Jungkook opens it with a smile. 

“Hyung you're here faster than I expected.” Jungkook says to whoever is at the door and you lean over to see, expecting Jimin or Taehyung but the man that is standing in the doorway makes you gasp. He is so handsome it almost hurts.  “I was already on the way when Namjoon called you.”

“This must be Y/n?” The stranger says noticing you before smiling. You openly stare at him and Jungkook clears his throat raising his eyebrows at you. You start at being caught and a blush rises in your face. 

“Yes this is Y/n.” Jungkook says amused at your reaction. “Y/n this is Jin, he’s my oldest Hyung.” 

You nod, “hi,” you cringe. You sound so stupid. 

“Well here is the food Kookie.” Jin hands Jungkook a bag, “I need to get going, but it was nice meeting you Y/n.” He waves and you wave back awkwardly. He laughs and ruffles Jungkook’s hair before walking away.  

“So that was Jin.” Jungkook smiles taking the food to the counter. 

“He’s uhm very…”

“Handsome?” Jungkook offers and you groan. 

“I didn’t mean to stare I promise.” You bite your lip but Jungkook laughs.

“It’s okay everyone has the same reaction, I promise he’s more flattered than anything else.” He chuckles and you cringe. 

You really need to get a grip on yourself but you just don’t understand why all these handsome men are suddenly popping up in your life. It’s like someone is playing a stupid joke on you. 

“Here you go.” Jungkook hands you a bowl of food that you wrinkle your nose at. “You have to eat.” Jungkook press but you shake your head. 

“I really don’t want to.” You pout and he sighs. 

He bites his lip. “Just a few bites.” You don’t budge. 

“Please?” He pouts and holds up a spoon full of rice. You frown before rolling your eyes and taking a deliberate bite. 

He smiles in victory. You have no idea why you gave in to him. You would blame it on your fever but you’re pretty sure you would have given in even if you weren’t as sick as you are. You take another bite that he holds for you.

“I can eat by myself you know.” You say after you swallow.

He chuckles. “I’m not taking a chance.” He lifts up another spoon full and you look him in the eye as you let him feed you. 

He gets happier after every bite until finally you hold up your hand. 

“I can’t eat anymore,” and he nods understanding, putting the bowl down on the table. You pull your knees closer to you and wrap the blanket around yourself getting cold again. 

“How do you feel?” Jungkook asks putting his hand on your forehead. “You’re still very warm, if your fever hasn’t broke in a few hours I’m gonna take you to the hospital okay?” 

You nod, feeling yourself falling asleep again. “Okay.” You lay down on your side. “Will you stay?” 

Jungkook smiles softly and nods, “Yeah of course.” He strokes some hair form your face. “I’ll stay.” 

You hum contently and fall into unconsciousness. 

.

.

.

A ruckus in the kitchen wakes you up. You immediately shoot upright in bed, your body on high alert. You listen again but it’s quiet now. You pick up your phone looking at the time. It’s just past three in the morning, you should still be alone.

You debate calling Jungkook for a second but push the thought aside, you’d only feel stupid doing it,  besides you don’t want to disturb him. He went out with his friends for the night, it’s the weekend after all so he is off work but he told you he’d be crashing at Jimin’s place. So instead you get out of bed and tiptoe to your door. You press your ear to it trying to listen for any movement but there is nothing. 

You chew on your lip and decide to investigate. If this was a horror movie the whole audience would be yelling at you now. 

You creep down the hallway and peek around the corner to look at the kitchen. The lights are on and you see Jungkook digging around in the fridge. You laugh at yourself for being paranoid. 

The sound startles Jungkook and he spins around to face you. His face relaxes when he sees you and it morphs into a lopsided grin. 

“Hey, did I wake you? Sorry.” He pouts and your eyes widen in surprise at him but you just shake your head walking to the kitchen island.

“What are you doing back?” You ask leaning over the counter to see what he was doing. “I thought you were sleeping at Jimin’s?” 

“No, I wanted to come home because…” He is cut off by a hiccup. You look at him, he is leaning a bit to one side as if he is off balance and his eyes look glassy. 

“Jungkook are you drunk?” You giggle when he shakes his head profusely, the movement causing him to grimace and fall a bit to one side, only to catch himself in time. 

“No, I am not.” His words are a bit slurred and you laugh again. 

“Then why are you rummaging through our fridge at three in the morning?” You ask lifting an eyebrow. 

He opens his mouth as if to say something but he closes it again with a frown, unable to come up with an excuse.

“I wanted ramyun.” He says after an embarrassingly long time, through which you were giggling.

“Well, you’re not going to find it in the fridge.” You state and watch in amusement when he frowns and points to the cupboard, looking at you for approval. 

“Sit down I’ll make you some.” You chuckle and move to the cupboard getting out the packet.

“Thank you.” He drawls out and sits down on the bar stool.

“I just don’t want to have to treat burn wounds tonight.” You explain and smile at him, which he returns with a grin. 

You boil the water and look behind you to find him spinning on the stool. He stops when he feels you looking at him and he grins lopsidedly.

“I missed you.” He says and you frown. “I didn’t see you at all this week.” He pouts and you giggle at the expression. He looks so cute. 

He’s right this week you’ve been missing each other the entire time. You had another group assignment and had to work in the library with them the entire day. When you finally got home he was already gone. His words do surprise you but you brush it off as nothing more than drunk rambling. 

“I missed you too.” You say and he gasps in surprise. 

“You did?” He sounds like a child that was just told something unbelievable, and it makes you laugh.

“Yeah, we’re friends right?” That word has been starting to leave a bitter taste in your mouth recently, and you have an idea why, but you keep pushing it down. There is no reason to be thinking like that part of you wants to think. “Friends miss friends.” You finish, turning back to the food you’re making. 

“You’re right, I miss my hyungs when I don’t see them for a long time.” He rambles on behind you. “I think it’s because we all used to live together, but now I live here of course with you, right?” He sounds unsure and you chuckle. 

“Yes, you do.” You confirm it for him.

“Okay great.” He sounds pleased about it. 

He babbles on about stupid things while you cook, telling you about his night. He mentions a few girls that came up to him and you prickle a bit every time but he always rambles on not mentioning them again. 

Finally, you turn around and hand him the bowl of food that he takes with a smile. You lean on the other side of the counter watching him eat. 

“This is amazing,” he exclaims in between bites. “If this doctor thing doesn’t work out, you should become a chef.”

“You only say that because you’re drunk.” You explain with a laugh but he shakes his head, cheeks full of food. 

The conversation dies down while he eats. You move around cleaning up and filling up a bottle with water for him to drink. You place it down beside his now-empty bowl.

“You have to drink all of this now okay?” You say in your doctor's voice and he groans.

“All of it?” He says in disbelief and you smile.

“Yes or else you’ll have a nasty hangover tomorrow.” He nods and picks up the bottle, you laugh at his dramatic show of drinking the whole thing.

“I like it when I make you laugh,” he says when he’s finished and you blush. He stares at you.

“I like it when you blush too.” He adds and you blush even more. 

“I blush too easily when I’m with you.” You admit and he gets up to put the water bottle in the sink. He comes back without a word and stands next to you. 

“Here.” He places his cold hands on your cheeks. “To cool them down.” He smiles and you gasp at the contact. 

Another thing you’ve come to notice since becoming friends with him, other than that you felt lonely before is just how  incredibly touch-starved you are. He is so casual with his touches, always hugging you or sitting close to you and you realised how much you’ve been missing human contact. You can admit to yourself the fact that it is coming from him does also impact the effect it has. 

“There see all better.” He removes his hands and you cringe at how quickly you miss the contact. 

He is standing very close to you, your chests almost touching and the realisation makes you blush again. 

“O no, Y/n.” He moans and places his hands back onto your cheeks, stepping even closer. “You’re ruining my handy work.” He whispers. 

You stare at him. He is so beautiful and you’ve never been so close to him before. His eyes are shining and his lips are pink and look so soft. You pull your eyes away from his lips only to find him staring at yours. 

You bite your lip at the attention and he frowns moving his finger down to pull your bottom lip out from under your teeth. 

“You shouldn’t do that.” His voice sounds huskier now and it makes your heart race. 

“Why not?” You ask him softly.

“Because it makes me want to do this.” He says before leaning in slowly. 

You stop breathing, your heart racing and you close your eyes in anticipation of his lips falling onto yours. 

Just when you can feel his breath breezing over your lips, a door slams shut somewhere, breaking you out of the trance you were in. 

You back away from Jungkook. You were just about to kiss him! You were about to kiss him and he is drunk! You chastise yourself, missing the hurt that crosses his face. 

“I uhm… I think I should go back to bed.” You stammer out and rush out of the kitchen to your room. 

You close the door behind you and sink to the floor with your back to it. You can’t believe you were about to take advantage of his drunkenness and why? Because you have a bit of a crush on him? It’s disgusting. You rake your fingers through your hair and focus on calming your racing heart. The blush is burning through your cheeks and you place your own hands-on them to cool it down. 

You can only hope he won’t remember tonight.

.

.

.

“And that is the last time I’m asking your dad to make Lasagna.” You laugh and take a sip of your coffee. The café is buzzing with activity and your mom just finished filling you in on the antics your family have been up to since you last saw them. 

Your mom came to the city for work but her last meeting was canceled so you had time to get coffee with her. You watch her add more sugar to her coffee and laugh. She’s always had a sweet tooth. You got yours from her. 

“Do you want some?” She holds out the sugar pot to you after seeing you eye her coffee, but you shake your head. 

“No thanks, I drink my coffee black now.” You watch her surprised face and giggle. 

“Who are you and what have you done to my daughter?” She clutches her hand to her chest and you shake your head at her dramatics, smiling widely. 

You’ve really missed her. You’ve always been close to your family, even if they drive you crazy. Even your little sister, who couldn’t be more different from you, always on the sports field, but despite your differences you’ve always loved her terribly. 

“I just like it like this now.” You explain and she narrows her eyes at you in suspicion but eventually shrugs.

“How have you been honey?” she asks leaning forward with a caring look on her face. 

“I’m doing good,” you smile and when your mom doesn’t seem convinced you place your hand on hers. “I really am mom.”

“Are you sure? You look like there is something bothering you, not to mention you look like you haven’t slept in a month.” Her voice becomes stern at the last part and you roll your eyes.

“You sound like Jungkook.” The words just slip out and her eyes widen in surprise.

“Your roommate?” She asks and you nod your head.

“He’s always telling me I should sleep more.” Your mom nods.

“Well maybe you should listen to him he sounds like an intelligent young man.” She muses and you smile but at the thought of your roommate, your mood drops slightly.

After you almost kissed him a week ago there has been a small shift. Mostly things are the same but it’s like something is off. When you’re with his friends he’s his normal self but as soon as you are alone it’s like he becomes tense and soon finds an excuse to leave the room. He doesn’t seem to remember that night but you’re not so sure, why else would he behave like he is? Maybe he regrets almost kissing you and he is just pretending to not remember anything. You guess you should be glad he hasn’t brought up that night, it is what you hoped for after all. But it has left you more confused than anything else, why would he try to kiss you and then just not say anything after that?

“Earth to Y/n.” Your mom waves her hand in front of your face to get your attention. 

“Sorry, mom, what were you saying?” You apologise. Pushing the thoughts bothering you away. You should be enjoying your time with your mom, not worrying about your relationship with Jungkook, whatever that may be.

“I was asking if Lilly told you she got first line for field hockey?” She surveys you worried while she repeats herself. 

“O no she didn’t,” You smile trying to show your mom you’re okay. “You have to tell her I said I’m very proud of her.” 

“I’ll tell her.” Your mom smiles. “She is very excited, she said she’s going to ask you to come to some of her games, you should try to come.” 

“I will I promise.” You know it will be hard but for her, you will make a plan, maybe you can even invite Jungkook and his friends, she would love that. But as soon as the thought crosses your mind you dismiss it, you doubt Jungkook would want to come to anything with you right now. 

The rest of the time you and your mom just talk about your studies and plans for after next year when you graduate and have to start your internship. You bask in the conversation until your mom’s phone rings, signally she has to head out. 

“I love you, honey.” She hugs you tightly, “Make sure you eat well and try to get more sleep okay?” 

“I promise mom.” You giggle in your mom’s embrace. She pulls away holding you at arm's length.

“We are so very proud of you, your dad loves boasting about you on a daily basis.” You both laugh. Your dad has always been the type to tell everyone about every small accomplishment that his daughters achieve. 

“Thank you mom.” she pulls you into another hug just as her taxi stops outside. “Mom you have to go.” You giggle her hold not lessening on you. 

“Just another second, I miss you.” She says and you hug her tighter.

“I miss you too mom.” She finally pulls away and with one last kiss on your cheek she gets into her taxi, waving at you as it drives off. 

You sigh and sniff back the tears that threaten to fall. You shake your head and walk home. 

You can already hear the sound of the movie from outside the door when you get home. You open the door to see Jimin and Taehyung spread out on the couch. Their heads turn to the door when you come in and they smile. 

“Hey, Y/n.” They say in sync, you smile back, removing your boots.

“Hey guys, what are you watching?” You query closing the door. 

“Some movie Taehyung chose.” Jimin sounds bored and Taehyung pouts.

“You told me I have to choose.” Taehyung defends himself. 

“I expected you to choose something good,” Jimin says and is met with a pillow to the face in response. 

You move to the kitchen filling up a glass of water. 

“Where is Jungkook?” You ask when you notice that there isn’t a third person in front of the TV.

“O he went out,” Tae says not looking away from the TV. 

“O” You feel disappointed before something dawns on you. “Wait if he isn’t here how did you get in?” You narrow your eyes in suspicion.

“O well…” Jimin and Tae look at each other. 

“He let us in before he left,” Jimin says after a moment and you nod at the explanation. 

“Do you want to join us?” Tae asks turning around on the couch to see you. 

“No thanks guys, I have to study.” You shake your head and they groan. 

“You always have to study. Come and hang out with us.” Jimin pleads and you have to giggle at his pout. You think about it for a moment, you don’t really want to study anyway. 

“Fine.” You give in and they both smile making space for you on the couch in between them. 

You walk over and sit down in the space. You lean back and make yourself comfortable. 

“Here you can choose a new movie.” Jimin declares stealing the remote from Tae. 

“Hey!” Tae exclaims before clearing his throat. “I mean sure Y/n you can choose a new movie.” He relents and you laugh but don’t take the remote from Jimin’s outstretched hand.

“I’m okay, making choices right now is only going to melt my brain.” You confess and Jimin nods. 

“Okay, I’ll pick.” He says, exiting the movie and starts scrolling for a new one. 

“So don’t you want to know where Jungkook is?” Jimin asks, a mischievous look in his eyes as he looks at you. 

“Jimin.” Taehyung’s voice is stern but Jimin ignores him turning in his seat to face you. 

“So do you want to know?” He asks again and you stare at him. 

“Uhm… okay?” You look between Taehyung and Jimin, unsure about what’s going on. 

“He’s on a date.” Jimin gossips surveying your face for a reaction and you stare at him in surprise. 

“O…” You have to control your face to not show the disappointment that floods through you. “That’s good for him.” You say. 

Jimin and Taehyung exchange a look.

“Does it bother you?” Taehyung asks and you look at him.

“Of course not why would it?” You ask surprised, your voice a little to high and Taehyung smirks.

“Just asking.” He turns back in his seat as Jimin’s movie choice starts playing. 

You sink deeper into the couch and try to focus on the movie playing but your mind keeps going back to the information you just heard. 

He’s on a date. It shouldn’t bother you, you’re friends you should be happy for him but you’re not. It hurts. If he’s on a date it means any feelings you deluded yourself into thinking he has for you aren’t real. You keep thinking about it throughout the movie and soon it morphs into anger. How dare he almost kiss you, not talk to you about it, borderline avoid you and then go on a date with someone else. The anger builds and by the time Jimin and Taehyung leave you are ready to scream. 

You go to your room and try to cool down by focusing on studying, but you can’t. Every time your head goes back to imagining him with someone else and it makes you angry all over again. You finally give up on studying and just when you turn off your laptop you hear the front door open. You sit still for a minute weighing your options. 

You can finally confront him about this and demand to know what is going on, why he tried to kiss you and smooth things over and go back to being friends. Or you can take the easy route out and just ignore him and things can back to how they were in the beginning. You frown, you know you don’t want that. You don’t think you’d be able to handle it if you never speak again, so instead, you get up. 

He’s in the kitchen eating a bowl of cereal when you enter. He stops with the spoon halfway to his mouth when he spots you. 

“Hi.” He says and uncomfortably looks around.

“Hi,” you say back, walking into the kitchen. His eyes follow you as you walk, chewing slowly.

“Well, I’m gonna uhm…” He trails off clearly looking for an excuse to leave but you interrupt him.

“Jungkook can we talk.” You ask and he looks at you in surprise. 

“Uhm, sure.” He puts the bowl done. “About what?” He isn’t looking at you. 

You mentally prepare yourself for what you’re about to say. You hate confrontation but you know you need to do this. 

“About what happened when you were drunk.” You start and he looks at you.

“What do you mean?” He sounds confused but you know him well enough now to know when he is faking. “I can’t remember anything from that night.” 

“Are you sure?” You ask, crossing your arms. “Because you say that but you’ve been borderline avoiding me for the past few weeks and I need to know why.” 

“O well..” He rubs the back of his neck.

“I think you remember and I get if you regret almost kissing me, but you could have at least told me.” You continue not giving him time to try and explain himself. “Then I hear you went on a date, and I mean I get it you can do what you want, but you could at least have talked to me and set things straight and said you were just drunk and not just leave me confused as fuck.” You’re getting angry again and he stares at you in surprise. 

“Wait a date?” Is that really all he got from that? You narrow your eyes at him, why is he playing stupid. 

“Who said I went on a date?” He asks confused and you roll your eyes.

“Jimin told me.” You answer him, getting irritated now.

“Fucking Jimin,” he mumbles before looking at you. “Y/n I didn’t go on a date.” 

“What?” You frown in confusion, caught off guard. 

“Yeah, Jimin,” He moves closer so that he’s in front of you. “He must have told you to get you to confront me because he knows how I feel about you.” 

Your mind reels, and you uncross your arms in surprise. “Wait what do you mean how you feel about me?”

He groans. 

“This wasn’t supposed to happen like this.” He says, running his hands through his hair. “I was supposed to come to you like we practiced.” He says without thinking and you frown.

“Practiced?” You’re so confused. 

“I also wasn’t supposed to say that.” He blushes, and sighs. “I practiced with them how to do this but I guess that isn’t going to happen.” He bites his lip. 

“Jungkook what are you talking about.” You don’t understand what is going on. 

He sighs again. 

“Y/n I’m sorry I’ve been avoiding you but I didn’t know how to say this, and after you pulled away that night I thought you didn’t feel the same and honestly I was scared of being rejected, I know I was being stupid, I’m sorry if it hurt your feelings.” He steps forward, explaining. 

“I just like you a lot, I mean since I got to know you, you’ve been on my mind the entire time, and I thought being friends would be enough but then I got drunk and came home and you were here, I knew I shouldn’t have tried to kiss you but I just couldn’t stop myself you were right there and I couldn’t muster up the courage to do it sober, and then you pulled away and I felt awful for putting you in that situation and…” He rambles and you cut him off.

“Wow Jungkook, calm down.” You don’t even have time to process what he’s saying. 

“How can I calm down?” He says, his face red from blushing and working himself up. “Fuck Y/n I’ve been wanting to tell you for so long.”

His words finally start to sink in and you can feel yourself getting hopeful but you have to make sure what he’s saying.

“Jungkook are you saying you like me?” You ask stupidly and he steps closer taking your face into his hands.

“God Y/n I like you so fucking much, you drive me crazy.” He breathes out leaning in closer and your heart soars, beating unhealthily fast. “Please tell me if you don’t feel the same because then I will stop right now.”

“Jungkook.” He rips his eyes away from your lips and looks you in the eye. “Kiss me.” 

He doesn’t need to be asked twice. 

Finally, his lips find yours, and your heart and mind go haywire. You’re sure if you were hooked up to a heart monitor it would be going crazy. His lips move against yours and his hands move from your face to your waist pulling you closer. You wind your arms around his neck, and push your hand into his hair, pulling slightly and you smile when you hear the small moan escape his throat. You relish in his soft lips on yours and you melt into his chest. 

Finally, you pull away a few inches. You both breathe heavily, chests bumping into each other as they expand. He smiles joyously, before pecking you softly again. 

“Fuck,” he breathes out, “I’ve been wanting to do that for so long.”

“And I’ve wanted you to do that so long,” you confess and he smiles. 

“Well in that case.” He leans in again and you gladly meet his lips halfway. 

If the first kiss was sweet this one is intense. He moves his hands to the back of your thighs and picks you up. You gasp but wrap your legs around him before attaching your lips again. He carries you to the couch and lays you down on it softly without breaking the kiss. You make out until you feel like your lungs may implode from the lack of air, but even then you don’t pull away, his lips more of a necessity than oxygen. Your head spins, and you push him lightly making him pull away, but he catches your hand on his chest pinning it above your head. 

“I’m not done with you just yet, princess.” His voice is husky and you groan. 

“Holy shit finally.” 

Both of your heads snap to the front door where Jimin and Tae are standing with bags of take-out in their hands.

You both scramble to sit up, Jungkook falling off of the couch in surprise. 

Taehyung gapes at you and Jimin looks at you smugly. 

You blush but the only thing that crosses your muddled brain is where the fuck did they get a key. 

.

.

.

“A sewer?” 

“Wrong”

“A lake?” 

“Nope.” 

“Ugh… just tell me.” You’ve been trying to guess the answer to this ongoing dispute and Jungkook has not given you even one hint. 

“Where’s the fun in me telling you hmm?” He replies, where he is sitting behind you, his legs on either side of you.

You’re both on the couch, the TV casting a glow over the living room as you sit in the dark. It started with you watching a movie but when he finally came home it didn’t take 5 minutes until he pulled you into him, and started playing with your hair. 

Ever since you two kissed and confessed, he’s been finding every excuse possible to have you as close as possible, it’s like he wants to be touching you  at all times. One would think you’d mind but you definitely don’t.

 “There I finished.” He proclaims happily, taking a picture and showing it to you. 

On the screen is a very messy-looking french braid and you grimace in your mind at the untangling that is waiting for you later tonight, or is it later this morning? 

“It looks great hey?” Jungkook asks for reassurance when you haven’t said anything. He looks so proud how can you not smile widely at him. 

“It looks amazing Kookie.” You laugh, turning around fully and kissing him on the cheek.

You’ve both been making an effort to spend as much time together as possible. A very hard feat as he is away most of the day and night and you are studying most of the time. But you finally found the sweet spot just past 3 am. He tries to be home and you set an alarm to wake up in time. 

It was one of the nights when he was late that you were sitting on the couch braiding your hair for lack of something else to do. He came walking in with a limp, he tripped and fell while chasing Jimin, you swear this boy is one of the clumsiest people you have ever met. When he saw you braiding your hair he immediately asked you to teach him. He’s still perfecting it, so he likes to practice as much as possible. 

“I think I should grow my hair out,” He says, pulling on his hair as if it will become longer. “ Then I can braid my own hair.” The strands he was pulling fall into his face and he blows them away unsuccessfully. 

“I think it’ll look cute if you did,” You push the hair out of his face, “ Then you can wear it in a lot of styles.”

“Yeah, I’ll think about it.” He smiles and takes your hand that was playing with his hair, turning it around and starts to pepper kisses on your palm. 

“That tickles.” You try to pull away giggling but he just pulls you closer, until you are finally face level with him. 

He cups your face softly and smiles, leaning in to kiss you. Your lips meet in a sweet soft kiss and you pull away after a few seconds. He follows with his lips and you giggle at him. 

“That’s just mean.” He pouts and you smile, giving him a peck to make up for it. 

Jungkook smiles widely, wrapping his arms around you and hugging you tightly. He sighs in content. 

“I never thought when I met you that I would be lucky enough to be able to do this.” You look at him only to see him smiling softly, as he leans his head on top of yours. 

“ I also never thought you would be lucky enough.” You joke. 

“Is that so huh?” He laughs wrapping his legs around you as he starts to tickle you. His finger dancing over your sides.  

“Never be this lucky huh?” He laughs while you squeal from his tickling fingers, squirming to try and get away. But his legs and arms are locking you in. 

“Okay, okay.” You exclaim trying to breathe through the laughter. He stops his fingers poised to attack again mere centimeters away from your sides.

“ What?” He leans closer so that his ear is right beside your mouth, “ i don’t think I heard you.”

“I said, okay, you were always going to be so lucky.” You lay it on thick and he seems pleased, laughing at you. 

He hums wrapping his arms tightly around you and pulling you into his chest.

“ Of course you wouldn’t be bale to resist my charms.” He kisses the top of your head when you scoff. “But truth is I would never have been able to resist yours.” You can feel his lips stretch into a smile on top of your head and it causes you to smile. 

Your phone vibrates and you frown. Who would be texting you at this time? Jungkook hands you your phone and you check it. 

“Why is she awake?” You mumble, and frown.

“Who?” Jungkook inquiries. Tilting his head to see your screen. 

“My sister,” You turn the phone so he can read the message. “She is inviting me to her first game this weekend.”

“O, that’s nice are you going to go?” Jungkook asks seeing that you haven’t replied to her yet.

“I don’t know,” you groan. “I mean I haven’t seen her in so long and i miss her terribly, but I don’t know, I have class on Friday afternoon and getting there and back again at night is going to be a pain.” You wish you had a car but with everything so close to your apartment you never saw the need, until now. 

“Hmm…” Jungkook hums. “You can think about it tomorrow.” he states and pulls the phone from your hand and tucks your head underneath his chin again. You decide he is right, there is no use in worrying yourself about it now.

You relish in the moment. In the feel of his arms around you, his skin on yours and his cheek pressed on top of your head. You close your eyes and breath in. You smile softly as his scent invades your nose. Jungkook smells just so Jungkook, his laundry detergent mixed with something else you can never place your finger on. All you know is that it smells amazing, and you nuzzle closer into his chest. 

The warmth radiates off of him, keeping you warm and his sweater underneath you cheek is soft. Your eyes are starting to get heavy, the time catching up to you, you peak at the clock. Just past 4 am, you guess it’s okay for you to sleep now. You wiggle until you're comfortable. Jungkook’s chest is rising and falling rhythmically, giving away the fact that he is also sleeping. You lightly close your eyes, ready to wake up cuddling later today. 

That thought is wrenched from your head just like your comfortable pillow, when Jungkook slips off the couch in surprise at his phone’s ringing, breaking the soft silence that occupied the space mere moments ago. You follow Jungkook to the floor, but quickly get up to help him search for his phone, that he finds a minute later holding it above his head triumphantly, before realising he has to answer the still ringing phone. 

His expression changes from sleepy and smiling to cold and serious as he listens to the person talking on the other side. You frown in confusion but he shakes his head getting up from the floor all while talking low and in short sentences that give nothing away about what they are speaking about. 

You know this routine, Jungkook’s work calls him at all hours of the day and night. You tried to convince him that he should quit but he refused, saying that finding a new job now is only going to stress him out. You don’t understand at all but you decided not to push, however the bunch of job ads on your laptop is ready when he is. 

“Sorry baby, I have to leave, apparently someone disappeared while on duty.” He explains pulling on his jacket and racing forward to give you a kiss on the cheek. 

“Okay, be safe.” You call after him. He gives you one last smile and disappears through the door. 

You sit in the quiet apartment for a while, thinking everything over. The past months have really thrown everything around,  but you couldn’t be happier about it. You can’t believe there was a time that you didn’t even speak to Jungkook. 

Everyone always calls him intimidating but you so easily got the sweet side to him you can’t understand what Jimin and Taehyung means when they say Jungkook can be scary and people are afraid of him. Sure you’ve seen him irritated but what they’re describing sounds more like people are really afraid of him.  He always denies it though and argues with them. They usually give up very easily, especially when they are reminded of your presence. You guess he doesn’t want you to think badly of him. 

You don’t think it would be possible to think badly of Jungkook, he is so sweet, so compassionate and so understanding. He goes out of his way to help you study and supports you before tests by always making you coffee. 

You get up, getting the sticky notes you now have an abundance of at all times. You write him a message for when he gets home, you know you’ll probably be asleep when he gets back. 

The notes have morphed from just telling each other when you’re going out to becoming a full conversation tool. Since you both struggle to see each other, missing each other some days completely you started leaving notes as a way of saying good morning, reminding the other of something or just give them a nice message for the day. The warning to not die or to avoid something horrible during the other’s absence is still a necessity. 

You smile and stick the note to his bedroom door. Taehyung has on multiple occasions double checked on both of your phones that you do actually understand the concept of texting. He gagged evey time at what he calls the “sickly sweet” messages between you two. Reminded of that, you do send him a text to be safe, before your get into bed. 

In bed, cozy and warm you finally fall asleep after two true crime videos.

.

.

.

Becky is rambling again. This time about how her parents won’t buy her a new car after she crashed hers. You roll your eyes when she isn’t looking and nod your head when she is. 

“I mean the crash wasn’t even my fault the other car wasn’t suppose to be there. Who parks in designated parking anyway?” She continues, even though you've long been blocking out her words.

You realise she is waiting for a response. 

“Yeah definitely.” you say to please her and she’s off again. 

Your mind wanders to your sister. You had to tell you couldn’t come to her game tonight and the sadness in her voice still hurts you every time you think about it. Maybe you should just go. You can take a taxi, but you already cringe at the amount of money that would be. You could ask your parents but you feel guilty. They are already paying your rent, and your studies prevent you from getting a job, so you can’t contribute to anything. At least you have a scholarship, you guess. 

“O my god.” Becky exclaims and it takes you a moment to realise she’s stopped walking. You frown at her, wondering what made her stop. “He has friends!” She pulls you closer and you frown finally looking up to see what she is looking at. 

Your eyes land on Jungkook, Taehyung and Jimin, who are all stood at the road, leaning against a car. When Jungkook sees you he smiles but the smile drops when he sees who you’re with. He whispers something to his friends who immediately look up from their phones. 

“Come on.” Becky’s nails are digging into your arm as she pulls you forward to the three waiting men. 

“I know you know that one but you have to introduce me to his friends okay?” She hisses into your ear, before throwing her brightest smile at the men. 

You grimace a bit at the thought of introducing them, your worst fear suddenly becoming her dating Taehyung or Jimin. She pulls you along until you’re standing in front of them. 

“Hey ba…” Jungkook can’t even greet you before Becky is chipping in. 

“Hey I’m sure you remember me, we met a few weeks ago.” She smiles at Jungkook. “But I haven’t had the pleasure to meet your friends. Right Y/n?” She squeezes your arm painfully and you wince, smiling awkwardly. 

“Right uhm..this is Jimin and this is Taehyung.” You gesture to the two men hoping she’ll release her hold on you now. You’re not that lucky. 

“Jimin, Taehyung.” She smiles dazzlingly. “ it’s so nice to meet you I’m…” 

“Becky.” Jimin finishes her sentence for her, glaring at her. 

“We know.” Taehyung adds mimicking his friend’s expression. 

Becky tilts her head to the side at their hostility, the smile still on her face as if cemented there. 

“Baby why don’t we get going?” Jungkook asks you, placing his hand on the arm that Becky is still clinging to, forcing her to remove her hands from you. Jungkook pulls you to his side, wrapping an arm around you as soon as you're next to him. 

“Baby?” Becky gasps in surprise. “Wow, are you guys dating?” Becky exclaims, her voice sickly sweet. 

“Yes we are.” Jungkook answers with an eyebrow raised, irritation seeping out of him. 

“You sure do have an interesting taste in girls.” Becky comments and looks you up and down her eyes judging you but as soon as she turns back to the men she’s all smiles again. 

Jungkook must have noticed because his hold on you tightens. 

“We should go on a double date sometime.” She winks at Jimin.

“Yeah you’re definitely not my type,” Jimin responds scoffing walking away from her to get in the car without a second glance. 

Becky gasps, bawling her hands into fists. Her smile is gone and instead her face is screwed up like a toddler’s who is about to throw a tantrum. She gasps for words but in the time it takes her to arrange her thoughts Jungkook is dragging you into the car before driving off. 

“Can you imagine the audacity of her.” Jimin rants.

“And the way she insulted you in front of us.” Taehyung adds. 

“It’s okay guys don’t worry.” You try to calm them down. The whole situation makes you laugh. “Thanks for teaching her a lesson.” You look to the backseat with a smile and both men seem to be placated for now. 

“Are you okay?” Jungkook asks, glancing at you before returning his gaze back onto the road. 

You sigh, “yeah I’m okay,” you stroke your arm where she was holding you. “ who knew fake nails could hurt so much.” You chuckle looking at Jungkook only to see his jaw clenching. 

“She hurt you?” He asks and you shrug. 

“Do you want us to kill her?” Taehyung pipes up and you laugh at the suggestion. 

“Thanks but Jungkook already offered.” You laugh and it makes Jungkook smile at the memory. 

“Wait,” you frown suddenly realising you’re in a car driving somewhere. “Where are we going? And whose car is this?” 

“We’re kidnapping you.” Jimin jokes and you frown in confusion. 

“No really where are we going?” You chuckle but they shake their heads. 

“Just trust us okay?” Jungkook says squeezing your thigh, leaving his one hand there while he drives, causing you to blush.

The rest of the drive is filled with you begging them to tell you where you’re going but they never budge. 

When you finally arrive you frown. What are you doing at a school? 

You hesitantly follow the boys’ lead and get out of the car. There are people everywhere, teenagers walking in little groups laughing, adults chasing after smaller children as they run to the food stands. There is excitement in the air you can feel it and it isn’t until a certain pair of faces catch your eye that you realise where you are. How could you not have figured it out sooner. 

Your mom and dad come rushing towards you, smiles plastered onto their faces and you feel your face mimicking theirs immediately. 

“Hi…” You barely get the word out before your dad pulls you into a bearhug. His arms tightening around your body and you let out a squeak signaling that you can’t breath. 

“O sorry honey,” He chuckles and release you, giving your mom the chance to pull you into a less squishy hug. 

“I can’t believe you came,” Your mother grins, brushing some of your hair back into place, “ Lilly is going to be so happy, what changed your mind?” 

You blush. “ It’s less of my doing and more of theirs.” You point to the three boys behind your parents who have been watching the scene with pleased smiles. “Mom, dad,” You walk to Jungkook when your parents turn at your pointing finger, “ This is Jungkook, my… roommate.” You glance at him afraid he’ll be angry at you for not introducing him as your boyfriend or something but he just smiles brightly, his nose scrunching up and you almost melt. 

“It’s a pleasure to meet you.” He sticks out his hand for your parents to shake, your dad smile at him shaking his hand and your mom throws you a look. You groan inwardly you already know that look, it’s basically saying “ why didn’t you tell me he is so good looking?”.  You give her a look back trying to prevent her from asking all her questions out loud. 

“Well Jungkook it’s so nice to finally put a face to the name,” your dad says happily 

“And who came with you?” Your mom asks looking past you at Jimin and Taehyung who has now taken a bunch of signs out of the back of the car. 

“O this is my friends,” Jungkook gestures, “ This is Jimin and Taehyung, they wanted to come support Y/n’s little sister with us.” 

“O isn’t that lovely,” Your mom says clutching her heart, clearly moved by the sweetness. 

“Don’t get it wrong Ma’m this was all Jungkook’s idea, we just made the signs.” Jimin smiles and turns the sign in his hand around to show your sister's name in glitter. You look at them in surprise, they probably made all of this last night, and you can feel your chest getting warm from the emotions bubbling up in you. You turn to Jungkook and he awkwardly rubs the back of his neck. 

He leans down to whisper to you while your parents fret over the Jimin and Taehyung’s effort. “They went a bit overboard.” He blushes slightly and you just shake your head. “I love it, thank you.” You want to kiss him but your dad is already there stuffing one of the signs in your hands.

“Come on you two the game is about to start.” Your dad proclaims, nodding to your mom who is  already walking to the bleachers with Jimin and Taehyung in tow. You and Jungkook follow quickly and as soon as you find your seats, the teams come rushing onto the field. 

“Which one is your sister?” Jungkook asks over the screams of the crowd and you point to Lilly.

Her hair is dyed blonde at the moment making her easy to find as the light bounces off it. She turns to the bleachers searching and you wave holding up the sign in your hands. You can see the exact moment she finds you because her eyes light up and a huge grin forms on her face, she follows the signs with her name on it and frown for a second at the three boys holding the others, lifting an eyebrow at you before her teammates drag her into huddle. 

“She looks like you.” Taehyung leans over Jungkook to tell you and you roll your eyes. Everyone says it but you and your sister have never seen the resemblance. Maybe it’s because you’re both so different in personality that it makes you unable to see the physical similarities. 

“Did you play sports in school Y/n?” Jungkook asks. 

At his question your mom dad laughs. “ No, Y/n-bear has always been the studying type.” He ruffles your hair and you groan. “She fell asleep in the library so often the librarian had our number.” Your dad jokes and you cringe. 

“Dad…” You whine and the three boys next to you burst out laughing. 

“Y/n-bear huh.” Jungkook giggles and you cringe and stick out your tongue at him. 

“As if your parents don’t have a embarrassing nickname for you.” You counter but his smile drops for a second, before coming back. 

“We just call him Kookie.” Jimin pipes up causing Jungkook to blush. 

“Or Bambi because when we met him he had these huge eyes.” Taehyung joins in smirking as Jungkook groans, clearly enjoying teasing the younger boy. Jungkook playfully smack him in retaliation and Taehyung is just about to fight back when the whistle blows, signaling the start of the game. 

The game is a stressful one, the two teams keeping the score even. You cheer with every goal you’re sister’s team scores and you have to physically calm your dad down from yelling at the referee when he makes a bad call, only to find the other three men yelling along with him. At some point in the game, Jungkook’s hand finds yours and you intertwine your fingers together. You’re jumping up and down in celebration of another goal when you turn to him smiling wide to find him staring at you. The intense look on his face makes you blush. 

“What ?” You ask a little out of breath but he just shakes his head. 

“ I think I might be in trouble,” He whispers in your ear and you frown in confusion. 

“Why?” You cock your head to the side, staring into his eyes. 

“Because,” he tucks a strand of hair behind your ear, “ I can’t help but think every time I see you, how much I love you.” 

The bleachers burst out in an eruption of cheers as the end whistle blows signaling your sister’s win. But all you can hear is Jungkook’s confession ringing in your ears. You’re both staring into each other’s eyes and you’re about to reply when your dad pulls you into a hug, cheering for your sister, and starts to drag you down to the field to go congratulate her in person. You look back to see Jungkook softly smiling at you as Jimin and Taehyung jump onto him for a group hug. 

As soon as your sister sees you she is running to you at full speed, crashing into you and making you stumble back. 

“Did you see I scored the winning goal!” she exclaims and her teammates burst into cheers again around her. 

“I saw Lils I saw.” you lie, it’s not like you’re going to tell her you missed it because you just heard Jungkook say he loves you for the first time. 

“O my god, I can’t believe you’re here, I’m so glad you came.” she gushes, shaking you and jumping up and down. In moments like these she reminds you a lot of a hyperactive puppy. She suddenly stops, looking over your shoulder and you turn to see what she’s looking at. “Who are they?” she asks and you smile when your eyes land on Jungkook and his friends.

“That’s…” 

“Hi, I’m Jimin, wow I’m a huge fan the way you just scored that goal amazing, just amazing!” Jimin interrupts you before you can even introduce him. 

“Right, that was awesome who knew Y/n’s little sister is such a badass.” Taehyung joins Jimin. “Im Taehyung by the way we’re Y/n’s friends.” 

“I didn’t know my sister had such gorgeous friends wow,” Your sister blurts out without a bit of shame. “Did you make the signs? I loved them by the way.” 

They both nod enthusiastically and she hugs them both. Your sister has never been the shy type, she shows how she’s feeling without a care, which is very nice when she’s happy but can be a pain in the ass when she’s mad. Jimin and Taehyung don’t seem to mind though and they happily accept the physical contact. 

“Lilly this is Jungkook.” You finally get her attention back to you. Her eyes widen at the mention of his name.

“So you’re my sister’s roommate?” She asks and when he nods she jumps up an down clapping her hands. “She told me a lot about you, it’s so nice to meet you.”

Jungkook chuckles, glancing at you at the new information. “It’s nice to meet you too, I’d love to hear all about the things your sister has been telling you.” He smirks and she laughs. 

“O yeah, I’ll tell you but come meet my teammates first they’ve all been distracted by the three hot guys on the bleachers.” Jungkook barely has a moment to react before Lilly is dragging him, Tae and Jimin to her friends. You just stand and laugh, ignoring their pleading stares for help as they are bombarded by teenage girls.

“Fancy meeting you here Y/n.” A voice next to you makes you jump and you look to the side, only to find a man who looks strangely familiar. You rack your brain and when you finally figure out how you know him, you freeze. It’s that creepy guy from the elevator. 

“I haven’t seen you around the building, have you been avoiding me?” Damion asks his voice making it sound like he’s hurt but his eyes are as cold as ever. 

“What are you doing here?” You blurt out, confused and you’ll admit a little bit scared.

“O my niece is in the other team, she asked me to come watch her game,” He waves his hand as if to brush off the accusatory tone in your voice. His eyes fall onto the scene behind you, “Is that your sister?” He asks innocently and you only nod. “She looks just like you.” He smiles but it sends a chill down your spine, he leans closer and you cringe back but his hand is holding you in place. “I’d love to meet her one day, “ he whispers.

“Y/n!” Lilly’s voice makes you look towards where she is beckoning you closer, you sigh out in relief to have an excuse to get away from Damion but when you turn to say something he’s gone. 

You shake your head a little to clear it and plaster on a smile. You walk to where Lilly and your parents are standing. 

“Hey you okay?” Jungkook asks when you’re close enough and you just nod. 

“Yeah I’m fine, just a bit cold.” You lie, although the night has turned chilly and without missing a beat Jungkook takes off his jacket and drapes it around you.  

“Y/n are you and the boys going to join us for post game celebrations?” Your mom asks, and you sigh.

“I’m sorry guys but I have a test coming up.” You bite your lip feeling bad. 

“You can miss one night of studying right?” Lilly interjects, “ I still want to hang out with you.” She pouts and it breaks your heart to have to say no. 

“Come now Lilly you know how hard your sister has to study, we don’t want to keep her out too late.” Your dad scolds her but your sister’s face doesn’t change. 

“We’ll come visit again,” Jungkook says trying to soothe her and she looks at him surprised. 

“Yeah and then we can go out to get ice cream or something.” You pipe up gratefully. “I promise.” You hold out your pinky finger and after a second she takes it in her own. 

“Okay, fine but you all have to come again.” She looks to Jimin and Tae too and they smile promising her. 

You all walk back to the together. Lilly who now seems much more satisfied is leading the way talking animatedly to Jungkook and Jimin while Taehyung is taking up your father’s attention , talking about god knows what. 

“He’s a very nice young man.” Your mom says looping her arm through yours while she stares at Jungkook laughing at something Lilly said. 

“Yeah he is.” You agree happy to know your mom likes him. If you were to tell her of your relationship with Jungkook you’re at least sure she’ll approve.

“You two make a good couple.” You look at her in surprise. “Mom…” 

“ O please save it,  do you think I’m blind?” She asks amused and you shake your head on impulse.  “ the way you two look at each other  is enough to make anyone see that you’re absolutely crazy for each other.” 

You blush and she coos, “O my sweet Y/n has her first boyfriend.” She squishes your face in her hands and you shake loose of her hold. “Mom stop it.” you whine but she just giggles. 

“I’m glad you’re happy sweety.” 

“Me too Mom,” you smile, “and I am really happy.” She nods and you say goodbye quickly, the others already waiting at the car. 

You hug your dad and with one last squishy hug from Lilly you get in the car. Although you love your family you can’t wait to get back to the apartment, because you have something very important to do. 

Jimin and Taehyung say goodbye to you in the street because they have to return the car that they apparently borrowed from Hobi, though you don’t know how loosely they used the term borrowed. So it’s just you and Jungkook who goes up to the apartment. 

“Jungkook…” The front door closes behind you. He turns around and you throw yourself into his arms. “Thank you so much for tonight.” You mumble into his chest, holding him tighter. 

You feel his chuckle reverberate through his chest. “ It’s a pleasure, I’m just glad your parents seem to like me,” he pulls away so that he can see your face, “they do like me right?”

You laugh. Is that what he was worrying about tonight? “Are you kidding my mom loves you.” 

Jungkook breathes out dramatically. “O thank god, otherwise we would have to be star-crossed lovers.” He smirks and you roll your eyes, earning a kiss on the forehead from him. 

“I did want to talk to you actually.” You bite your lip, looking away feeling shy all of a sudden. 

Jungkook lifts his eyebrows. “That doesn’t sound good.” He leads you to the couch to sit down, his hands holding yours.

“It’s nothing bad I promise it’s just after what you said on the bleachers well…” 

Jungkook interrupts you. “Y/n it’s okay, you don’t have to say it back if you don’t want to.” 

“No that’s not it I…”

“I didn’t say it for an answer I said it that you know how I feel.” He rambles.

“No Jungkook…” 

He isn’t looking at you but he continues to talk. “I mean I know it’s probably too soon to say it, we haven’t been dating that long but…”

 “Jungkook!” his gaze snap to you in surprise and you smile. “I’m trying to say that I love you too.” You watch in amusement as his face morphs from shocked to blushing and then it lands on something else.

“Say it again.” His eyes are hooded and he is leaning towards you.

“What?” You’re confused, your eyebrows furrowing. 

He raises your hands over your head causing you to fall back onto the couch. He leans over you now, smirking and his stare intense. 

“Say,” he kisses your cheek, “it”, he kisses your jaw, “again.” His lips find your neck and you squirm a bit.

“I love you.” You say breathlessly, he removes his lips from your neck to look at you. 

“Good girl.” Is all he says before his lips captures yours. You can feel yourself melt and butterflies erupt in your stomach at his words. He bites your bottom lip lightly and you moan, causing him to smile. His lips are hot against yours, impatient in its movements as if he can’t get enough of you. 

You tug at his hand that is still holding your wrists and he lets go, only for you to thread them into his hair pulling lightly. He groans and wraps his arms around your back pulling you onto his lap. 

You’ve made out before of course but something was different tonight it’s as if you’re both starving for each other. You tug at his shirt’s hem and he gets the message because he rips it off before pulling you closer again. You place your hand on his chest and gasp at the warmth of his skin underneath your palms. You lightly drag your nails down his chest and he moans into your mouth when it rests at the waistband of his pants.

He pulls away slightly giving you both a moment to breathe. “ Baby wait.” He takes your hand on his pants in his own, holding it against his chest. 

“Why?” You pout and he chuckles. 

“I really want to do this, really want to, but we can’t on the couch.” He explains and your mind immediately goes to the many times Taehyung and Jimin have burst into the apartment and found you both on the couch in compromising positions like this. 

“Fine,” You say and get up from his lap, holding out your hand for him, “Your bed or mine?” 

He smirks and picks you up. You gasp and wrap your legs around his waist as he carries you into his room, making sure to lock the door behind him.

.

.

.

You impatiently tap your fingers on the counter waiting for the coffee machine. You were too lazy to put on any real clothes not seeing the point so you’re dressed in one of Jungkook’s hoodies and socks. A podcast is playing over your headphones and you already have a cup ready in your hand. You’re taking a break from studying but you know you’ll probably finish the coffee in your room  in what is now essentially just your study, seeing as you don’t sleep in there anymore. You smile lightly at the memory of this morning, a relaxed sunny morning filled with soft kisses and cuddles. That is until you finally had to tear yourself away to go to class and Jungkook had to go to work. You got back from class a few hours ago but your boyfriend still hasn’t returned. His note had said he’ll probably be home late, so you’re not worried, but you wish you knew what he was busy with. 

Even after all this time you still didn’t know what exactly his job is. He would always tip-toe around the question claiming that he does a lot of things, odd jobs really, but you feel like he isn’t telling you the full truth. You don’t see a reason to confront him about it though, because what job could possibly be a bad one right?

You’re so lost in thought you don’t even feel the presence behind you until arms wrap around you. 

You scream, hurling around only to find a giggling Jungkook behind you. 

Jungkook takes out the headphones in your ears. “ You should be careful, I could have been a murderer.” He jokes.

You roll your eyes. “I knew you were there the entire time.” Which of course is a lie, you had no idea that someone was in the apartment. 

“Yeah?” You nod profusely.

 Jungkook pulls you closer. “Then why did you scream?” He smirks knowing that you’re lying. 

You open your mouth to reply but you can’t really think of anything to say so you close it again to his amusement. 

“Yeah I thought so.” He smiles at you. You stare at his smile. It always makes you smile too, the way his whole face lights up and you’re sure you can stare at him forever when he looks at you the way he is now.

“That doesn’t matter anyway,” you pull him closer, “because now that you’re home, we can spend the rest of the night together.” 

He raises his eyebrows, “Yeah? what did you have in mind hmm?” He is smirking again, backing you up until your back meets the counter, caging you in. His eyes are hooded, gone is the bunny smiling man and instead he looks like a predator, waiting for you to make the first move.

You smirk, and pull him closer until your lips meet. You kiss him sweetly but after a moment you rack your fingers into his hair pulling him even closer and deepening the kiss. He moans lightly into your mouth and you smirk pulling away. 

“Maybe we should watch a movie?” You say innocently trying to escape his hold but he doesn’t relent.

“O no you’re not getting away that easily. I come home and you’re only in my hoodie,” He tugs at the fabric lightly. “I’m definitely not watching a movie with you like this.” 

You shrug. “ Fine by me.” You giggle, leaning in for another kiss but he suddenly grimaces in pain. 

“Jungkook?” You question as he grips onto his leg. 

“Just give me a moment okay?” He says, his eyes a bit panicked, you nod and he backs away. You catch sight of his hand when it leaves his black covered leg and you’ve been patching him up so much you can easily see the red liquid that coats it. 

Your eyes go wide. “Jungkook is that blood?” You move closer to him but he moves back. 

“It’s fine, don’t worry.” He replies, but you’re not so easily convinced. 

“Let me see.” You command but he shakes his head. “Jungkook let me see.” You use your doctor voice and he sighs. 

“We better go to the bathroom then.” He looks worried which makes you worry, but you help him to the bathroom where he sits down on the closed toilet. You kneel in front of him.

Now that you’re closer you can see the wet stain that is growing by the second. And you gasp when he removes his pants and you get a good look at the wound. The skin is peeled away on his thigh leaving a long deep gash and a bunch of bruising around it. It isn’t something you’ve seen before in person.

“Jungkook what happened?” You sound a bit hysteric even to your own ears. 

Jungkook curses when he sees it. “I thought he missed.” He mumbles.

“Missed what?” You ask stupidly, staring up at Jungkook. 

“I got mugged again.” He tries to explain but you see the way he looks away not meeting your eyes. 

“Okay either you’re the most unlucky person ever that gets mugged a lot or you’re lying to me.” You know it’s the latter. Unlike the first time that he came home bleeding you now know him well enough to know when he is lying. 

“Y/n…” He pleads for you to not press but you’ve had enough. 

“Jungkook, I’ve been quiet every time you come home injured, I patch you up and let it go but this looks like a bullet grazed you.” There is no other injury you can think of that will look like this. You look at him waiting for him to deny it but he just sighs. 

“Y/n can’t you just patch me up and forget about it?” He sounds angry but you can see that it’s just clouding panic. 

“No, tell me what happened.” You demand. “I’m your girlfriend don’t you think I’m at least entitled to the truth?” 

He shakes his head. “You shouldn’t know the truth.” He says it through clenched teeth and you frown. 

“You really don’t think I deserve to know the truth?” You raise your voice, getting angry now. Why can’t he just tell you? 

“That’s not what I’m saying, it’s just better that you don’t know the truth.” He is getting angry now too. 

“That makes no sense, did this happen because of your job?” You can’t think of another explanation as to why he keeps getting hurt like this. 

He glares at you and for the first time ever you see his scary gaze directed at you. “That has nothing to do with you.” He growls and you flinch. He looks like he regrets it immediately but you don’t look at him. Instead you start disinfecting the wound. 

You don’t react when he tries to get your attention throughout the process, you just wrap up his injury and when you’re done you stand up without a word. 

Jungkook grabs your wrist and you stare at him. “ Wait, I’m sorry. Can we just talk about this?” 

“I don’t want to hear anymore lies Jungkook.” You retort but he doesn’t let you go. 

He gulps and bites his lip, clearly struggling. “If I tell you what happen you’ll run away from me.” He says it with such certainty that you hesitate for a second. He sounds so sad. 

“You won’t know that unless you tell me, besides you should know me better than to think I’d just leave you because you told me the truth,” you try to wrench your hand away from him, but he stands up winching a bit. 

“Okay, I’ll tell you but all I’m asking is that you remember what you just said.” You nod, now a bit scared because Jungkook looks so anxious. 

You wait for him on the couch while he changes into some pants. He comes out without a shirt on and you frown at all the bruises on his torso. There are some cuts too but they’re not very deep. Once again you see the white scars, you noticed that first time.

Jungkook stands sheepishly at the entrance to the hallway as if unsure whether to sit or run away. 

“Do you want coffee?” He asks hesitantly.

“ Jungkook stop stalling please,” You sigh, “Just come sit down.” You just want to know what is happening.

He sighs and walks slowly to sit on the couch, keeping the distance between you two, which you’re thankful for.

You sit in silence waiting for Jungkook to say something but he sits hunched over scratching at his cuticles and avoids looking at you. 

“Jungkook the longer you take the more my head is jumping to conclusions,” You break the silence trying to spur him on to speak.

“Yeah?” He still doesn't look at you. “Like what?” 

You stare at him. “I don’t know,” You throw up your hands, “ like that you’re a serial killer or something.” 

Jungkook chuckles humorlessly. “I’m not a serial killer Y/n.” 

“Then what can be so bad?” You question, leaning in closer to him, not seeing a way that something can be worse. 

Jungkook takes a deep breath in. “I’m in the mafia Y/n.” He glances at you waiting for your reaction. 

To his surprise you laugh. “Okay, sure Kook you’re in the mafia.” You watch him, waiting for him to laugh too and give up the joke but he just stares at you seriously. 

“O my god,” It takes a minute to sink in, “ that's how you know how to hide a body isn’t it?.” 

“ Well I don’t actually do the hiding bit.” He chuckles again still glancing at you nervously picking at his fingers. 

You just stare at him. Everything feels cold all of a sudden. “Then what bit do you do?”

But you don’t give him a chance to respond something dawning on you. “O my god, you’ve killed people before haven’t you?” 

Jungkook just looks away, his reaction all answer you need. 

You pull your legs further away from him, into your chest, moving as far away from him on the couch as possible.

 Jungkook, your Jungkook is in the mafia, is a murderer. You can’t wrap your head around how the sweet, bunny-smiling man you love is capable of any of that. The man who showers you with kisses in the morning to wake you up. The man that makes you pancakes and coffee before a test, that braids your hair after you shower.  You don’t know what to think or do. Should you run? Should you call the police? You just don’t know. All you do know is that you suddenly feel the need to be as far away from him as possible. For the first time ever you feel scared being in his presence. 

“Please don’t run away,” he asks you, his hand twitching as if to hold onto you but he retracts it, “Remember you promised.”

“Yeah I promised because I thought you were going to tell me you're a stripper or something, not that you're in the mafia.” You sound a bit hysterical, unsure of what to think or do, your head running a thousand miles an hour. 

Finally you decide. You stand up from the couch, and you can see the hurt written all over his face. 

You sigh. “I’m not running away, I just… I need a moment to think okay?” 

He just nods. “Do you want me to leave?” 

You shake your head  “No, I don’t know, maybe? I just don’t know anything right now okay.”  

You turn on your heels and walk to your room, leaving him on the couch. 

You close the door to your room and you sink to the floor. You have to process what you just heard. You finally found out the truth and now you wonder if your should have just been kept in the dark. Maybe it would have been easier. No, you decide it’s better that you know.

In some ways you feel stupid. All the late nights calls, him coming home with various injuries and vague explanations. Even the tip-toeing around what his actual job is. You feel like a fool for not at least expecting it to be a possibility. But how could you have it feels so unreal and yet it is the reality, no changing that.

 You just have to decide what to do now, so you go sit down at your desk, throwing all your notes on the floor and pulling out a clean piece of paper. You draw a line down the middle. A pros and cons list. 

You laugh humorlessly at yourself. You used to do this when you had to decide whether to join the debate team or decathlon team, not whether you should stay with your mafia boyfriend or not. Is he even your boyfriend anymore? Do you want him to be? 

You sit with the pen tip pushed on the page but you can’t write. Of course the cons are obvious. You stay with him and know that he is doing illegal things every day. You stay with him knowing you could be putting yourself in danger as well. But you can’t come to a conclusion even though the cons outweigh the pros. The only pro is that you love him.

You’re a logical person, you always have been, so it should be easy when you look at the list, but you just can’t get the sad look on his face out of your head. The way he didn’t want to tell you because he was so sure you would leave him. 

It’s happened before you realise. He wasn’t keeping this from you just because he didn’t want to tell you but because he didn’t want you to leave. You think of all the things he’s done for you, walking you home after class because it was getting dark. Taking you to see your sister’s game just because he knew you were sad to miss it. Taking care of you while you were sick. That man wasn’t someone malicious. So who is the real Jungkook then?  

You start to look at it differently. From a different angle the way your dad always told you to do when you were struggling with something. You don’t know the full story, you don’t know how he got sucked into this life. 

Finally you get up. If you’re going to make a decision you need to know everything. 

.

.

.

You knock on his door a few hours later. You can hear shuffling inside and finally it opens. Jungkook’s hair is disheveled as if he’s been tugging at it and his eyes are red like he’s been crying. Behind him you can see bags half packed. 

“What are you doing?” You ask, suddenly panicking that he is packing.

“You said you needed space so I thought I’d make everything easier for you and leave.” He says sniveling a little bit. 

“Jungkook I didn’t mean you have to move out I just needed some time that’s all.” Even now you have the urge to hug him to make him feel better. 

“Does that mean you want me to stay?” He asks hopefully. 

“It means I want to know everything.” He frowns in confusion. “I want to know what happened how this all happened.” 

He nods and step aside inviting you in. “Well then you better sit down it’s kind of a long story.” 

You enter his room, that just a few hours ago was the room you shared with him. How ironic that just his morning you were tangled up in his bed with him and now you’re sitting on it waiting to hear him tell you how he got into the mafia. 

He sits down next to you, still keeping space between you two as if too scared to sit near you. 

He sighs and racks his fingers through his hair. “I haven't told anybody this, the only people who knows are my Hyungs.” 

You frown. “ Wait so Jimin and Taehyung are also in this?” You can’t believe it. But he holds up his hand, stopping you from asking anymore questions, and even though your head is full of them, you keep quiet.

“I’ll get to that part but I guess I have to start at the beginning.” He sighs before looking at you. 

“My childhood wasn’t like yours, there were no picnics and movie nights or family dinners. My dad wasn’t a good person. He would beat me up daily. I remember him locking me in a closet because I was afraid of the dark when I was 5, saying that it will teach me a lesson.” You gasp not even being able to imagine what that must have been like. 

“He would punish me for the most basic things, and as I got older it only got worse.” He grimaces at the memories. 

“My mom on the other hand was the best. She tried to intervene even if it meant getting hurt herself. She would sneak me food when my dad refused to give me any, and every year on my birthday she would make me a small cake, just enough for me and her.”

 He smiles softly. “ She tried her best, always telling me stories of how we’ll escape and get a house near a river with wildflowers, and how she would bake me cookies and I can catch fireflies in the summer.” He sighs. “Of course that couldn’t happen, my dad kept her locked in the house and she had no money of her own but yet she tried so hard to find a way out.” He swallows hard. “ One night she came into my room and told me to pack a bag, that we were finally escaping.” His voice is almost a whisper at this point “We were so close, almost out through the small window in the basement when he caught us.” His voice breaks and you can’t help but put a hand over his. You asked for the whole story but now you wish you hadn’t, just so that he didn’t have to relive the memories. 

“He killed her.” He looks at you with teary eyes. “Right in front of me.” 

“O Jungkook.” But he just shakes his head wiping away the tears. 

“So it was just me and my dad and well you’ve seen the scars.” You immediately understand where those white scars you were wondering about came from and you have to stop yourself from hugging him. 

“I’m not telling you this to try and manipulate you into letting me stay, I just want to give you background information.” He says softly and you can't imagine why he would even think that you were considering him trusting you with this as manipulation. 

“So anyway,” he continues. “ My dad at some point got involved with some pretty bad people and one night they burst into the house, demanding him to pay what he owed them but of course he couldn't. He gambled it all away.” He takes a breath. “So they shot him. They didn’t know I was in the house so I climbed through a window to get away,” 

He chuckles lightly looking at you and it surprises you. “Let me tell you running away with a broken ankle isn’t easy.” You don’t know what to say startled by the way he laughs at this, so you just wait for him to continue, which he does. 

“ I lived on the street for a while, trying to get scraps from dumpsters behind restaurants you know that kind of thing.” He looks to you as if you know what he means but you don't. You’ve never had to live like that before and knowing that it was what he was used to for who knows how long makes your heart break. 

“That’s where Namjoon-hyung found me, I was 10 at the time, some guys were beating me up because I had wandered into their territory. He and the others intervened and after that he took me in.” He looks at you again. “I didn’t know what they were doing in the beginning, I was so skittish barely anyone could get near me, but eventually Jimin got through to me and  slowly I learned to trust them all. When I was 13, Namjoon-hyung  told me what they did. I was disgusted at first, but they had become my family. A real family, so how could I ever leave them.” 

“Did they force you into it then?” You ask when he pauses.

But Jungkook shakes his head. “No, they never forced me to do anything, but I wanted to train with them and one night I asked Jimin if I could tag along on a mission.” He looks to the side as if imagining it. 

“The mission was routine, just getting a shipment nothing serious, but on the way back we came across a man trying to pull a girl into an alley.” His face goes hard. “Jimin made everyone stop and we saved her. He told me after that we have a code.” He looks at you. “ We protect the people in our territory, that we may live in a world full of violence but we don’t have to let innocent people live in it too.” 

You nod your head trying to understand what he means and you think you do. 

He risks taking your hands into his. “Y/n I may be a bad person and I have done bad things but you have to know that I never acted with you, everything I did or said it was real, is real. Hell, I wasn’t even supposed to be living here anymore.” 

You frown. “What do you mean?” 

“When I came to live with you I just needed a place to hide for a few weeks, but this place became like a sanctuary to me away from all the violence, where I can just be myself, and after a while, I realised it wasn’t just the apartment it was you too.” He takes a deep breath and his eyes fill with tears. 

“I understand if you want me to leave and never want anything to do with me again, I can’t ask you to still love me but I can only make sure that you know that I truly love you.” He waits for you to speak and you know he is waiting for you to kick him out. 

“Jungkook, a rational person would kick you out right now,” A tear makes it way down his cheek, “Luckily I have never been a rationale person.” You pull him into a hug. 

“If we met differently yes maybe I would be running for the hills but Jungkook,” You pull away a bit, wiping the tears from his face, “I love you for the person you showed me you are and I believe that, that is the real you, and that the only thing you ever wanted was a family, and now that you found one you will fight for them no matter what.” 

Jungkook pushes his face into your neck and let’s out a sob. You place your hand on his back rubbing circles on it trying to soothe him as he lets it all out. You sit like that for what feels like hours, hugging and him just nuzzling into your neck even after he stopped crying.

“So I’m basically a mafia doctor then?” You joke trying to lighten the mood.  

He chuckles. “Yeah, everyone is jealous that I can just get patched up by you without doing it myself.” 

You frown. “Do you guys just, what ,patch yourselves up?” 

“We’ve learned how to do the basics so we help each other.” He sighs and plays with your fingers. “I was suppose to go to headquarters that night you helped me for the first time but I guess my brain just wanted safety.” 

You sigh. “ Well I mean I could help the others too if they want me…”

“No.” Jungkook interrupts you, and you look taken aback. “Not because I want to keep you to myself but I don’t want you anywhere near that part of my life, it’s too dangerous, that’s why I didn’t want to tell you in the first place even if some of the others said I should.” 

You frown. “ Who said you should?”

“Jimin and Hobi hyung.” He mumbles looking away.

“Not Tae?” You raise an eyebrow at the information.

Jungkook shakes his head. “No, he said it would be too unsafe, Jimin didn’t want to keep you in the dark and Hobi said you deserved to know the truth.”

You look down at your intertwined hands as a thought dawns on you. “Are you going to get in trouble for telling me?” 

Jungkook shakes his head . “No, the others were more indifferent than against it, so I should be fine.” He smiles lightly at you, placing his finger underneath your chin making you look at him. 

“I’m glad you didn’t run away, I don’t know how I would have broken it to the other two. They like you too much.” He jokes.

“Well I mean I guess I knew too much anyway so you would have had to drag me back.” You play along as he leans in closer.

“Yeah probably would have had to tie you up too.” He smiles and you roll your eyes.

The moment is broken however by Jungkook’s phone ringing. He looks at you solemnly as he answers. For the first time, your heart skips a beat when you see him seriously listening to what is said on the other side, now knowing what is happening. 

“You have to go?” You guess and he nods sadly. 

“I’m sorry, but it’s just a meeting okay no danger.” He tries to ease your worried look. You just nod and walk him to the front door. 

But before he leaves you pull him into a tight hug. “Just promise to come home okay?” You almost feel like crying, is this how women feel sending their husbands off to war? 

He pulls away and leans down so that you’re at eye level. “I may come home hurt,” He smiles lightly, “ but I will always come home, I promise.”  He kisses your forehead before leaving. His words not reassuring you at all. 

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.

“Why can’t you guys just tell me?” You plead with Jimin and Tae who are sprawled out on the couch, barely glancing at you standing in front of them with crossed arms. 

“Because Jungkook told us not to.” Jimin says lazily, not looking up from his phone. 

You’ve been trying to get them to tell you the best way to hide a body for the past 15 minutes. The joke with Jungkook turning into a real competition after you found out he actually does know the right answer. 

It’s been a few weeks since he confessed to you he’s in the mafia and you’ve gotten used to the idea now. You still worry about him but you’re more relaxed when he lets things slip about his other life. He still looks at you anxiously whenever he does slip up as if you are going to change your mind and run away at any moment, but you never do. You have to say after he told you a lot of things fell into place that you never really gave too much thought to, like the way he would smirk or smile at remarks you would make from time to time. Everything finally at least makes sense now.

Jimin and Taehyung acted like polar opposites to the news that you know the truth. Jimin seemed relieved before he started almost spilling everything about what they do before Jungkook had to drag him away by the back of the neck to make it very clear to him that he doesn’t want you to know any details about it. 

Taehyung on the other hand seemed angry and didn’t talk to you at first, glaring at Jimin whenever he would make a joke about their real lives. After a particular joke about who is best with a sniper, he stood up and dragged you to the hallway.

“Taehyung I know you’re angry that I know but…” You were cut off by his arms wrapping around you. 

“I’m not angry, I just didn’t want anything to change.” He admitted still hugging you. “I didn’t want to lose you as a friend.”

You pulled away slightly to look into his eyes. “Tae, I already made my choice, I’m not going to run away from you guys.” 

After that, he warmed up again, happy to know his fears weren’t going to become a reality. 

You did however have a small falling out with them when you learned how they kept getting into your apartment. 

You had found them playing video games when you got back from class one day and knowing that Jungkook wasn’t home at all that day you had stepped in front of them making them pause their game and demanded to know how they got in.

Jimin had blushed profusely as Tae admitted embarrassed that they have been picking the lock. You had blown up at that, scolding them about privacy and personal space and yes, how illegal it is. 

They had stared up at you like two naughty children the whole time. They tried to kiss-ass the entire day after that but you ignored them, and the chocolate and coffee they brought to you as an apology.

It wasn’t until later when Jungkook asked you what was wrong and you told him everything that he made you understand. To them, like Jungkook, the apartment is a place they don’t have to even think about their lives. In the mansion where they all live, apart from Jungkook, they always have to be reminded in some way or the other of the reality of their lives, but here they could just truly and fully relax. 

You felt bad so to make up for it you had something made for them. 

“A key?” Tae had asked confused holding it up and turning it around. 

“Yes a key,” You had sassed, “I’m sure you’re not very familiar with the concept but now you don’t have to pick my locks every time you want to hang out here.” You had explained and were immediately pulled into a group hug, sandwiched between the two of them.

Of course, you had laid down some ground rules eventually like texting you before coming over so that they didn’t catch you in your underwear… again. But for the most part, they came and went as they pleased, happy to be trusted by you. 

Which brings you back to the present, of them completely ignoring your wishes. 

“I thought we were friends.” You pout making them at least look at you. 

“No, don’t give us that face,” Taehyung physically puts his hand over his eyes. “We can’t tell you, we promised.” 

“But what’s a promise really Taetae?” You know you’re playing dirty but you’re willing to if it means you can best Jungkook in your little game. 

“Y/n what are you doing?” Jungkook’s voice comes from the front door, you didn’t even notice that it had opened. 

“Kookie she is trying to get us to tell her how to hide a body.” Jimin spills the beans immediately and you glare at him earning only a smirk in return. 

Jungkook gasps and walks to you. “Y/n that is cheating.” 

You sigh dramatically. “You never said that I couldn’t get any help.” 

“It is an obvious rule, besides they won’t tell you.” He glances at his friends lifting an eyebrow at them “Right guys?”  

They both just nod, their attention back to their phones. 

“Ughh that’s just unfair,” You whine and stomp your foot but smile none the less when Jungkook pulls you into his chest.

“No, that's the game and you should play fair.” he chuckles kissing the pout off your face. 

“Ewww guys.” Jimin complains, at the show of affection. 

“Hey, you're in my house.” You glare at him, kicking a pillow laying on the floor at him. 

He just shrugs, “fair point.” 

“That being said Y/n,” Taehyung pipes up, “What are we gonna eat?” He smiles a boxy smile at you. 

You turn to him, Jungkook hugging you from behind tucking his chin in the crook of your neck. 

“What am I your mother? Damn” You question rolling your eyes, “You can make your own food.”

“Baby we haven’t gone grocery shopping.” Jungkook whispers in your ear and you cringe as the other two laugh. 

“Well, then you can order your own takeout.” You say instead, earning more laughter. 

“Or better yet you can go get takeout for all of us.” Jungkook adds.

Jimin and Taehyung groan but gets up from the couch nonetheless. Grumbling about stupid friends, and third-wheeling they head out the door. 

“We’ll be back in like 20 minutes so just keep that in mind.” Jimin yells as Taehyung pulls him out the door. 

“20 minutes huh?” Jungkook whispers into your neck, “ we can do a lot in 20 minutes.” He lightly kisses your neck and you moan softly. 

“Are you trying to seduce me?” You giggle and you feel him smile against your skin. 

“That depends are you seducable?” He asks.

“No,” You lie,  stepping out of his hold, his arms still in the shape they were when you were in them. He looks shocked. “You’re just trying to get out of doing the dishes by using your …” You wave your hands randomly trying to come up with the right word, “charms.” 

“My charms?” He questions stepping forward holding you by your hips. “Well then do I charm you a lot?” He leans down to kiss you. 

“Yes, but not tonight,” You lean back away from his lips even though they are hard to resist. “I have no coffee cups left.”

He laughs loudly throwing his head back. “Okay, okay,” he relents and lets you go, moving past you but not before whispering in your ear. “But I’m having you all to myself tonight.” 

You feel a tingle travel down your spine and for a moment you regret your decision to make him do the dishes now, that is until you see the pile stacked in the sink and agree that you can wait until later tonight even if you have to kick Tae and Jimin out to be alone with him. 

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You wake up in Jungkook’s arms. His bare chest pressed against your back, his leg hooked over your hip. You smile softly as you feel his breath breeze over your neck, your gaze travelling from his arm that you’re using as a pillow to his hand. You place yours in his, playing with his fingers and running your fingertips over the callouses on his palm. 

You giggle as you're pulled closer into him by his other arm his lips now right by your ear. 

“What are you doing pretty girl?” He asks in his husky morning voice and you melt at the sound of it. You’re sure if you could you’d record it and put it as your ringtone. You’re also quite sure he wouldn’t mind. 

“I’m just thinking.” You reply, intertwining your fingers with his. 

“O yeah?” He asks, moving his lips down to your neck, not kissing just resting his lips against the skin. “What about?” 

You smile wide and turn around in his hold to face him. His eyes are hidden a bit by his hair falling into his face. He wraps both of his arms around you at the change in position. 

“I was thinking about how happy I am.” You tell him pushing his hair out of his face and revealing his relaxed eyes, the deep brown of them sparkling in the morning light. 

He smiles widely at your answer, “ And what makes you so happy?” He asks scrunching his nose.

You place your finger to your chin to show you’re thinking.  “Probably the thought of coffee.” You chuckle and he groans burrowing his face into the crook of your neck, knowing that this means he’ll have to let go of you. 

“No,” He tightens his grip on you. “I refuse, I think you should just stay right here.” His words whisper over your skin and feel goosebumps popping up in their wake. 

You pout. “That’s a bit selfish don’t you think?” You ask, pulling back so he has to look at you. 

He shrugs. “Then I’m selfish.” He says before nuzzling back into your neck. 

“Being selfish isn’t a good thing Kookie.” You giggle at him, running your fingers lovingly through his hair.

“I’m in the mafia I’m not supposed to be nice.” He mumbles into your neck and you laugh.

“But you’re suppose to be nice to me, because you love me.” You sing-song, making him laugh. His laugh reverberates through his chest and you can feel it vibrating against yours. 

“You’ve got me there.” He admits, and sighs. But he doesn’t release you like you thought he would. He grips you tighter and sits up with you still in his hold. 

“What are you doing?” You ask in surprise, before you let out a squeal as he stands up making you wrap your legs around him. 

“I’m getting you coffee in a selfish way.” He smiles down at you and moves you up higher by holding you by the back of your thighs. 

“You are such an idiot.” You laugh as he walks to the kitchen and without putting you down he turns on the brand new coffeemaker he got you. 

“Yeah but you love me anyway.” He replies, walking over to the cupboard and waits for you to pick out a cup. He smiles at your choice. It’s one of those cups that has a printed photo on it. The photo is of you two when you went to the arcade, in it Jungkook is pouting while you hug a huge plushie he won for you instead of him.  Jimin had taken the photo laughing his ass off at Jungkook’s expression. You had it printed on the mug as an accessory to the new coffeemaker much to Jungkook’s amusement. 

He finally puts you down on the counter as the coffeemaker pours the coffee into your mug. He stands in between your legs playing with his shirt that you’re wearing. 

“What’s the plans for today?” He asks you.

You tilt your head a bit. “ Well I have class,” You see his expression drop, “but, I think I’ll skip today.” You finish chuckling as his face lights up. 

“Really?” He asks grinning widely.

“Yeah,” You nod, “I think I like how this morning is going too much to tear myself away from it.” You shrug as you admit it.

He smirks and leans in. “I think I’m a bad influence on you.” 

“O you don’t have to think, you’re definitely a bad influence.” You laugh before meeting his lips half-way and pulling him closer with your legs to kiss him properly. His lips are soft against yours and you relish in the feeling of this domestic moment. Something you two don’t get to do enough. 

You pull away. “But I do have plans.” You tell him.

“And what are these plans hm?” He smiles softly, tilting his head to the side in curiosity. 

You smirk. “I’m going to kidnap you for the day.” 

He holds up his hands as if your going to put handcuffs on him, pressing his wrists together. “Then I’m your prisoner for the day.” You both laugh happily. 

You weren’t lying though you do have a surprise for him today so your excited to get going after your cuddle session on the couch while you drink your coffee. 

“I didn’t think you meant we would have to go outside.” Jungkook whines as you drag him into the shower. 

“You’re going to like it I promise,” you say while you wash his hair. 

“If I don’t then you have to make dinner tonight,” he bargains and you only shake your head laughing.

You're both finally ready, after getting side tracked many times with kisses and hugs as you got dressed. 

You hold hands as you walk down to the bus stop, making puns out of the different signs you see as you walk past. You finally get on the bus and you make up stories for the other people on it. 

“I promise he is going to dispose of a body look at the size of that bag.” You whisper, gesturing to the man in front who has a bag so big it takes up a whole seat next to him. 

Jungkook laughs and shakes his head. “ The girl behind him probably helped him kill the person.” He gestures to the person sitting behind the man.

You snort, “You mean the old woman who has a basket filled with flowers?” 

“Hey, you should have seen the look she gave me when we got on.” He justifies himself, staring at you while you laugh. 

“Why are you staring at me?” You ask, your laugh now only a chuckle.

“How can I not,” He wraps his arm around you and pulls you into him. “You’re just so god damn beautiful.” 

You blush and turn your face away from him , but he already saw your blush and when you glance at him he smiles at you satisfied at making you blush. 

You finally arrive at your stop and you pull Jungkook along down the street to your destination. 

He gasps when he sees where you brought him. 

You turn back to him smiling. “See I knew you’d love it.” You gloat.

The park is situated right by a river and the wildflowers are blooming in patches swaying softly in the breeze. The big trees cast shade over the green lush grass. You had remembered how he described what his mom told him so you had Google searched for hours to find the right place to bring him to.

You walk to a big tree close to the river and then demand the bag he has been carrying. You pull out a blanket and spread it onto the grass while Jungkook discovers the snacks you packed.  

You spend the day laying on the blanket, eating the snacks and ice cream from a stall nearby. You try to find shapes in the clouds, and every now and again have to tilt the other’s head to make them see it the way you are. 

“That is definitely not a rabbit Kook, that is obviously a duck.” You giggle from your spot on his lap as he keeps on insisting the cloud is a bunny. 

“Just tilt your head more to the left and close your eyes and then it is definitely a bunny.” Jungkook says and you laugh hard. 

You get an idea. “Here let me show you something.” You get up holding out your hand for him to take, he smiles and takes it happily. 

You pull him over to the patch of wildflowers closest to you, and bend down starting to pick some. “What are you doing?” He asks but follows your example all the same. 

“Just wait.” You say as you bring the bouquets back to your blanket. You sit down and pick out a few from different colours and start weaving them together. Jungkook just sits and watches you and when you finally hold up the finished flower crown he grins. 

“Here,” you lean over placing it onto his head. “Now you’re my prince.” You laugh and he giggles when you take a photo of him.

You spend a few minutes showing him how to make one of his own and soon you’re sporting his creation too. You grin into the camera as he takes photo after photo of you. It turns into a mini photoshoot as he smiles and directs you how to pose. 

Finally you sit leaning your head on his chest as you watch the sunset over the river. 

“Y/n?” He says softly and you hum letting him know that you’re listening. “Thank you.” 

His voice makes you remove your head from his shoulder looking at him. “It’s a pleasure Kook.” 

He shakes his head bringing his hand up to cup your cheek. “No, not just for today for everything,” he lightly kisses your forehead leaving his lips against your skin as he whispers, “I love you so much.” 

You grin at him. “I love you too. ”You whisper back. You sit like that for a moment until you hear him gasp.

You open your eyes and see the green flickers rising up from the ground. 

“Fireflies.” Jungkook whispers and you smile softly at him. 

You watch his eyes light up as they follow the little bugs. He turns to you with slighty glossy eyes. “You remembered?” He asks softly.

“I thought since she couldn’t take you some place like this I thought I would.” You say placing your hand over his. 

He stays quiet and for a second looking out at the river as the fireflies light op the night and you start to wonder if you overstepped. But then he looks at you with a huge smile. 

“She would have loved you.” He says a small tear escaping his eye and running down his cheek. You wipe it away with your thumb. You smile sadly at him, and he wraps his arm around you pulling you close to him as you both watch the little flickers dance across the water. The scent of the wildflowers entangling itself in the moment. 

You sit like that speaking softly, as if you were to speak normally it would break the moment, until it starts getting cold. So you pack up and with Jungkook’s jacket over your shoulders you make your way back onto the bus. 

The drive back is peaceful as you watch the scenery pass by the windows. He holds you close to him the entire time, talking about plans to go back to the park in a few weeks.

When you finally cross the threshold of your apartment, he pulls you into a soft hug and drag you to the couch for a movie. The movie plays softly while you two talk, talks about plans for the holidays that he wants to spend with your family, and if you’d like to meet his hyungs and spend new year with them. You talk about the future together like you never had before, long past the end of this year or even the years after that.

You lay with your head on his chest as you listen to his voice, and when you close your eyes you can see your whole life with Jungkook. Walking to him down an isle in a white dress, sitting and drinking coffee at little shops up and down the coast, travelling to different countries with him, and one day looking over a river on a porch somewhere with him by your side, grey haired and wrinkled faced. The thoughts of his job or the implications it may have on your future pushed away by the softness of the moment.

You smile as the last things you hear before you fall asleep is his whispered words. “I can see my  forever in your eyes Y/n.”

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.

You know you shouldn’t be walking home in the dark, but you didn’t want to trouble Jungkook. He’s on an important mission with Jimin and Yoongi apparently. The details you of course know nothing about, he never tells you anything of what they are doing. On some level, you guess it you’re glad you don’t have to hear it but on another, it makes you anxious to not know what is happening, and if he is in danger. 

You scoff, of course, he’s in danger. Every time he leaves for missions or meetings he’s in danger and it makes you lay awake unable to sleep until you feel him crawl into bed next to you. Only then when he pulls you closer can you finally fall asleep. 

Your phone vibrates and you pull it out of your pocket to check. You smile softly at your lockscreen the picture of him with his flower crown from that day at the park. You look at the text, it’s your mother reminding you of the games night tomorrow that you and Jungkook said you’ll attend. He confessed to you that he loves spending time with your family and although he doesn’t say it and you’ll never ask if it’s true, you know it’s because he never really had a family dynamic like yours.

 So even if Lilly goes overboard and bombards him with questions and your mother fusses over  him and makes him eat all the experimental food she made, or your father having long boring talks with him, he always smiles and when you look closely you see a sadness in his eyes when you have to leave. 

He’s told you multiple times that the members are his family and that they can all be themselves at home, and you believe him fully. You just think that he finds some normality in spending time with your family that he can’t always find with them. 

You reply your mom and put your phone away, you know you shouldn’t walk with it out, and it’s almost dead anyway. 

With your focus back on the streets you can’t help but feel the forever paranoia sinking in. You’ve gotten used to walking at night with Jungkook by your side, swinging your intertwined hands back and forth and talking to you about his hyungs and what they have been up to. He only tells you the domestic things of course, but you sometimes wonder about what their roles actually are in the mafia. You know they are all part of the inner circle and that Namjoon is the leader but other than that he keeps the information about that side of their lives secret.

You sigh. Your life really is strange, but to be honest as long as Jungkook is in it you don’t mind too much. Which is probably a stupid thing, him being a criminal should be the biggest red flag you have ever seen in a person but you know what lies beneath it all so you don’t mind too much being a stupid bull and running into it head on. 

You hear footsteps behind you and you sneakily look over your shoulder to see someone following you. No, they are just walking Y/n, not following, it’s okay not everyone is out to get you. 

You turn back to the front continuing on your journey home. Your apartment only a block away and you know a sticky note will be waiting for you with a sweet message probably adding to not get kidnapped or something. 

You smile, only to let it drop when you see a man lingering on the wall next to an alley. You still hear footsteps behind you too. You bite your lip and take a deep breath in deciding to cross the street instead just to be safe. 

Just as you step off the curb the man in front of you starts walking towards you. You look back and see the man behind you walking faster now. You throw caution into the wind and quickly walk to the other side of the street, your heart racing when you realise both men are following you. 

You decide fuck it and start running scared out of your wits now, you pull out your phone to call Jungkook, but just as you press the call button a van almost hits you as you cross the street. You stare into the headlights frozen and say sorry walking past quickly only for it to stop behind you. 

Before you can react the door opens and hands grab you, pulling you inside. You scream but a hand over your mouth stops the sound. The door sliding closed.

“Hey baby, I’m on my way home.” You hear Jungkook answer your call. You thrash and kick at the man holding you, the van is moving now and you’re forced to sit down. 

“Y/n?” Jungkook questions worry in his tone. 

You bite down hard at the hand over your mouth. The man gasps and lets go of your mouth, startled by your bite. 

“Jungkook help!” You scream before someone picks up the phone. 

“Y/n ?!” You hear Jungkook scream over the phone before the person holding it hangs up. 

You stare up as the phone’s light illuminates the person’s face and you feel a cold wave travel through your body. 

“Well hello Y/n” he smirks, “Fancy meeting you here.” 

You just stare at his face, Damion looking down at you. Before you feel a hard pain in your head and everything fades to black.

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.

You're woken up by a fist hitting your face. You groan in pain, trying to move away, but you feel your hands tied behind the chair you’re sitting on. The rope cuts into your wrists as you try to move.

You open your eyes, your blurry vision taking in your surroundings. You’re tied to a chair in the middle of an open space what you assume is a warehouse. The brick walls and concrete floor give it away. You see it’s staring to become light outside now, the sun almost rising. That means you’ve been missing for about 10 hours now.

“Welcome back Y/n.” You look up at Damion leaning on the wall in front of you. He slowly make his way over to you and kneels in front of you. 

“What do you want?”  You glare at him but you can see that he is aware of the panic sinking into your bones. You have no idea how you’re going to get out of this.

“I just want to have a chat,” he grips your bruised face and you flinch as he turns it to the side, inspecting the bruises and digging his fingers into them. “Just like the one I had with your little boyfriend when he called back. He was so worried.” Damion pouts and wipes at something on your forehead, his thumb coming back red from blood that must still be there from when they knocked you out. 

Judging by the pounding in your head you’re sure you have a concussion, if not you’re definitely on your way to one if they keep hitting you. 

“Jungkook will find me.” You say, certain of your words as you rip your face out of his grasp. 

“O no don’t fret, I’m counting on it.” Damion stands up walking a few feet back. “And what will he do when he sees you in this condition I wonder.” 

“What?” You question before someone hits you again. You taste blood in your mouth and you spit it out to the side. Damion comes back kneeling before you again but this time with a knife, he presses it against your cheek.

“You see Y/n, we, as in my organisation, have been looking for a way to get to Bangtan for a while now.” He trails the knife down to your collarbone. “And imagine my surprise when I found you, the little weakness to the most feared maknae.” he presses down on the knife cutting into your flesh and you scream as he drags it down. 

“You won’t be able to fight him off.” You say through the pain and he widen his eyes at you. 

“O we’re not planning to fight him off Y/n.” You frown at his words, but scream again as he cuts into your arm deeply, dragging the knife from your upper arm to your elbow. You can almost count the number of stitches you’ll need as the knife tears through your flesh.

“You see,” he smiles at you as if he didn’t just cut you, “we want to do something much worse.” 

He steps away wiping the blood off the knife with a cloth that one of the other men bring him. 

“And you little dove,” He bends down to be on your eye level, “are going to help us break him.” 

“I will never help you.” You spit out. 

He chuckles as one of the men brings something over. “I think you’ll change your mind about that.”

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Jungkook’s POV

His breathing is ragged as he slips past another guard. He feels the adrenaline pumping through his veins, his phone vibrating continuously as the others try to reach him. 

He can still hear your scream for help ringing in his ears, and the taunting words of Damion after that. 

How had he been so stupid? To let you out of his sight, no, how could he not have known one of their enemies were so close? 

Yoongi had raced home faster than ever after Jungkook told them what happened. Jimin’s face was hard as he spoke on the phone to Namjoon. Everyone met in the library. Jungkook knows he had screamed a lot especially when they weren’t working as fast as he wanted them to. All he could think about was the fact that you were alone with those men doing who knows what to you. You could be dead for all he knows. The thought still making tears bubble in his sinuses. No, you’re not he will find you and take you, wrap you up and make you some coffee and hope with everything in him that you won’t leave him after this. 

He runs past another hallway, flattening himself against a pillar as two men walk past going the other way. 

He came alone. He knows the others are following but he couldn’t wait so when Yoongi had finally found your location from your phone Jungkook had rushed out without thinking twice. He ignored the others or the rational part of him that kept whispering that this was too easy. It was too easy to find you, but he doesn’t give a shit as long as he can just find you and have you in his arms again. 

Even before you two were actually friends he had vowed to himself to keep you safe. His little roommate with her forever playing true crime videos and pens sticking out of her hair as she studies so hard. He always had a lower member follow you at night to make sure you got home safe. After you became closer he took over that role happily. You were so precious, so sweet how could he not have tried to keep you away from the bad things in the world, the girl who had patched him up when he came home half-dead, the girl that took him to see the fireflies, the girl that he loves. Even when he told you the truth he promised himself he will try to keep you as far away from everything bad surrounding him daily to, ironically,  avoid a situation like this.

He peeks around a corner to see two men guarding a door. He assumes that’s where you are. 

“She stopped screaming huh?” One of the men comments and Jungkook can feel anger like he’s never felt before rise up inside him. 

He sneaks closer using pillars and shadows as cover until he is close enough. He jumps out catching them by surprise because they both drop to the floor a few moments later, knocked out or dead he’s not sure and he doesn’t care right now.

He slowly opens the door, scanning all around before realising it is empty except for you tied to a chair, your head hanging forward. 

He rushes forward, you barely acknowledge his presence, only groaning lightly. He cuts the ropes holding your hands. The bruises are a deep purple around your wrists. He also takes note of the cuts on your arm and collarbone and it makes him sick. How could he have let this happen to you? 

“Hey baby,” Jungkook kneels before you, lifting your head up to look at you, he bares his teeth at the bruises covering your face, you flinch away from his touch before opening your eyes. Recognition swim in them as you fall forward into his shoulder. 

“O Jungkook.” You whisper into his neck.

“I know baby, but we have to get out of here okay, the others are on their way.” He says in a hushed voice, knowing that the sooner he gets you away the less violence you’ll have to see. And there will be violence, nobody touches you and gets away with it.

 He tries to get you to move but you don’t budge. 

“You have to leave.” You say softly, lifting your head up from his neck.

“What?” He frowns in confusion. “Y/n I’m not leaving you here.” 

“Please,” You beg, “You have to go.” You shove at him to try and make him move.

“Y/n…” Jungkook stares at the state you're in, trying to shove him away from you before you still. He sees your pleading eyes move from his, to look over his shoulder. He follows your gazeand is met with Damion and about a dozen men standing with him. 

“Welcome Jungkook.” Damion’s opens his arms wide, smiling. Jungkook moves infront of you to shield you. 

“You have me now, so let her go.” He growls out to the narcissistic man in front of him. He knows he can take them all, he’s done it before. There is a reason people are scared of him. He just wants to make sure you’re safe first.

“She can go,” Damion waves his hand and smiles. “But you want to do something first don’t you Y/n?” 

Jungkook frowns as you stand up behind him, you don’t look at him as you walk past him into Damion’s outstretched arms . 

Jungkook is frozen as he watch you walk away from him. He doesn’t even realise the two men that are grabbing onto him before they force him to his knees. His eyes don't leave your figure in the arms of the enemy. Why would you go to him so easily?

Damion hands you something and it takes him a second to realise it’s a gun. “Now just like I told you to do okay?” Damion says into your ear, his arm turning you around and Jungkook struggles at the sight of his hands on you. Damion smiles sinisterly at him from behind you.

You slowly walk to Jungkook, tears stream down your face and Jungkook frowns. What are you doing? He struggles to get to his feet, now that you have a gun he can use it to help him fight these men off. 

“Y/n?” He asks trying to have you explain to him what the fuck is happening, because he feels like he is going insane. 

“I’m sorry Jungkook.” You whimper, and Jungkook stops struggling as you slowly, as if in slow motion, raise the gun pointing it at his head. 

He stares at the barrel of the gun pointed at him and then at your face. You’re crying but there is a certain determination in them that he doesn’t understand. He can feel his heart breaking as he realise what is happening. 

You are betraying him. 

“Y/n why?” He asks his voice cracking, staring up at you. He is shocked, frozen in place. He knows he can fight back but it’s like all the fight has left him.  “ Please I love you.” He begs.

You bite your lip, wiping your tears away with your cut arm streaking your face with blood. You cock the gun, it trembles as it points at his head, but your face is void of emotion now.

“I love you too Jungkook.” You stare directly into his eyes, “ but sometimes, somethings matter more.” 

A/N Okay don’t kill me! I am planning a sequel so you can all stop screaming. I hope you did enjoy their little awkward strange love story. 

Please let me know your thoughts!

Where are you going? Are you okay? The thoughts taunt him as he sits down and works. He hates working from home, but he can’t go back to the studio. He can barely go to the café. Everywhere he goes there is the memory of you. Your face that night in his studio swims before his eyes every time he sets foot there, your laughter rings in his ears when he enters the café, and even driving past that tree on the side of the road makes his heartache. 

He wishes he could say that night is when he realised his feelings, but it wasn’t. He realised them in the studio, the darkness was electrifying, your body was so close and your lips were so tempting. But he restrained himself then because you were drunk, and since then he has been pushing the feelings down. He refused to acknowledge the way he reveled in the way your walls came down when you let him in that day in the rain.

No instead he fucked around and tried to drown himself in other people, but every time he kissed someone all he could imagine was you. Your lips on his, your body underneath him and it made him sick. 

He reads over another line of the new song. When had it become about you? He doesn’t know.  

You invaded every aspect of his being since he met you in the hallway. He had waited for your call back then and when the fighting started you became a constant in his life. He really hated you, he knows that but even then the fact that he knew you would be back brought him comfort because he could count on it. The deal only enforced that closeness and now. Now you’re gone, and it’s his fault.

At one point he would have reveled in it but he can’t. Not only because of the way it ended. No, because he knows he broke your trust, something he built up over the weeks you were forced into each other's company, and he broke it so easily.

Footsteps and voices invade his pity party. 

“Jungkook you can’t tell him.” Jimin sounds anxious as he speaks.

“He needs to know it wasn’t just his fault.” comes the youngest’s reply. “He’s been hating himself so much.”

‘’Not only that but he needs to know what happened to her.” Hobi’s voice joins the mix. Yoongi is surprised he is here, he was only suppose to come over after his shift. 

“Wait what’s happening?” Namjoon quiets the mumbled arguing. 

“Hyung,” Jungkook speaks finally. Yoongi guesses there was a conversation he missed between the other three.

“There are accusations against the football captain.” Jungkook continues and Yoongi frowns, why is that important?

“What accusations?” Namjoon asks calmly waiting for an explanation. There is silence for a while until Jimin finally breaks it

“Sexual assault ones Hyung.” Yoongi freezes. His body runs cold and hot at the same time. He stares at the ground. He can’t hear anything further. Was that what happened? He can’t stand to sit anymore, he rushes out of his room. 

Jimin and Jungkook stare at him but Hobi is looking at him in pity, and Namjoon is staring in shock, his calm composure faded away.

“What did you say?” Yoongi asks, his words strained. He doesn’t know if he really wants them to repeat the words but he needs to know. 

“We think he tried something that night with Y/n,” Jungkook whispers finally and Yoongi spirals.

That's why you were so broken. That's why you had those bruises. Fuck that’s why you came home early and that’s why you tried calling him. He feels disgusted with himself, here he was moping around because he broke your trust, and you have been dealing with this. 

“Yoongi say something please,” Hobi says, looking worriedly at the older man who has been standing still for far too long. 

“I am going to kill him,” Yoongi growls out, everyone looks at him shocked. “ I am going to fucking kill him!” he shouts, any reserve he may have had is gone. He is going to track this fucker down and smash his face in with his bare hands.

“Hyung please just calm down,” Jimin says, approaching Yoongi, he’s never seen him like this, none of them have. 

“Calm down?” Yoongi shouts. “Calm down when he did something like that to her!” 

He stomps forward. “ To Y/n!” He is trembling with rage. “To my Y/n!” He misses the way Jungkook and Namjoon look at each other.

He races to the door and grabs his jacket, already reaching for his keys on the hook, but it’s not there. 

“Where are my keys?” He tries to say it calmly, and everyone in the room exchange looks. 

“Yoongi you can’t drive in this state.” Hobi tries to reason with him. “Why don’t we just sit down for a moment.” 

“No.” Yoongi glares at his friend. 

“Yoongi, please try to be rational.” Namjoon stands up. “ What happened was awful but you can’t just storm out here and attack him.”

“Like hell, I can’t,” Yoongi replies, looking around the room frenzied before he spots the keys on the table beside the bonsai. 

As soon as his eyes land on it, Namjoon’s does too and they both lunge for it. Namjoon being closer gets them first. 

“Joon gives me the keys,” Yoongi says through clenched teeth. But the taller man holds the keys tighter. “Namjoon give me my fucking  keys,” Yoongi demands his chest heaving. 

“ Yoongi..” Namjoon tries but he’s cut off.

“No, you can’t say anything. You didn’t see her that night, tell him Jungkook, tell him how absolutely fucking scared she was.” Yoongi gestures to Jungkook but doesn’t wait for an answer. “She had to deal with this alone, and I couldn’t be there because you told me to give her space. She didn’t need fucking space, she needed me.” Yoongi steps closer to Namjoon, taking his bonsai off the table.

“Hyung,” Namjoon warns but Yoongi is having none of it.  

“Give me my keys or I will smash this.” He threatens. “ Give it to me!” Namjoon doesn’t relent. 

“Smash it, I don’t care.” Yoongi stares at him.

“That’s just it isn’t it, you don’t fucking care!” Yoongi shouts, holding back tears of rage. “You always act so aloof, you never care about anything, you call Y/n your friend but you don’t give a shit, because if you do you’d give me those keys so I can try to fix this.” 

“You’re not going to fix anything by murdering someone.” Namjoon says. 

“Then let me find her.” The fight is gone from him, he just wants to find you and pour his heart out. 

Namjoon surveys him for a moment before stretching his hand out, the keys in his palm. 

“Namjoon,” Hobi says but he is cut off by the younger ones shaking their heads. 

“Go find her.” Namjoon says and with that Yoongi takes his keys, trading them for the bonsai in his hands. 

Yoongi nods and disappears through the door. 

He runs for his car still in his slippers that get drenched in the snow immediately, but he couldn’t care less right now, he just has to find you. 

It’s just past five, you would be going to the library to study by now. Strange how he knows your schedule so well, but he guesses that’s what happens when you drive someone around for so long.

His car takes a second to start, standing out in the cold for so long but when it finally does he reverses and drives off in record time.

Someone hurt you. He takes a turn hard. 

He not only broke your trust but he left you alone after something like that. He should have tried harder. No, he shouldn’t have been an idiot. If he had only confessed earlier. If he hadn’t pushed his feelings down if he had gone to that party like everyone was telling him to that night. If he had found you, if he had picked up his phone, all of this could maybe have been prevented. He was such an idiot and he hated himself. 

He takes another turn and speeds up if he had just kissed you while parked under that tree when he wanted to if he had just done something, fucking anything maybe you wouldn’t have gotten hurt.

He curses and drives even faster, rounding the last corner. His tires slip, and before he can do anything that big old tree is approaching him too fast, he tries to jerk his steering wheel but it’s too late, he hits the tree, the airbag expands and he can feel the pain travel up his arm and blossom into his chest. 

The last thing he remembers thinking is how much he misses you.

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The hospital bed is really uncomfortable, he barely gets any sleep, and the three men arguing in hushed voices are not helping. It also doesn’t help that they are talking about you.

You still haven’t come to see him. The first thing he asked when he woke up here is where you were. No one could give him an answer. They all just stared at him in pity. 

He knows they have been trying to reach you and if his phone hadn’t been smashed in the accident he would have called you himself. He tried to, on all of their phones but you never picked up. 

Is that how little you want to do with him? You are even ignoring your shared friends. Namjoon said he was going to finally get you today after seeing Yoongi’s dejected face when they once again had to tell him you were still ignoring them. Hell, he would have gone and found you himself if he wasn’t stuck here for “observation”.  

The whispers in the room stop and he frowns slightly until he hears your voice. You’re here. It takes everything in him to not open his eyes, but he wants to hear what you say to the others. Too scared that you’ll tell them all to fuck off. He doesn’t think he’ll be able to take it, so he pretends to be asleep.

He listens to you, you sound so tired, he just wants to hug you, and when you ask them if he knows about what happened he can hear the slight fear in your voice. Do you think he will judge you? You know he would never do that don’t you? 

Finally, after what feels like an eternity Namjoon tells everyone to leave, he has to remember to thank him later. 

You come to sit next to him and he hears your whispered words. Not being able to take it anymore he finally “wakes up” saying the first thing that comes to mind. 

“You’re wrong.” How ironic. 

The banter and teasing come so naturally but he knows he needs to get this weight off of his chest so when he sees the opportunity he takes it. 

“ Y/n,” He sits up, the pain in his chest shooting into life, protesting but he pushes through it.

 “Hmm?” You hum showing him you’re listening. 

“I’m sorry,” He holds onto your hand tighter as if you’ll disappear if he doesn’t hold onto you. 

“For what?” What do you mean “for what” surely you know? But he continues, maybe you just want to hear him say it.

“About a lot of things really.” He looks down at your hands, they’re so soft and he can’t imagine why he hasn’t been holding your hand the whole time you've known each other. “ But mostly I’m sorry for not being there when you needed me to be. I hate myself for not picking up your call that night. an above all else I’m sorry you had to go through that.” Every word is true and he looks at you, he begs you for the forgiveness he knows he doesn’t deserve.

“It’s okay,” You say after a moment of silence and he breathes out, but you look away from him. “You have nothing to be sorry for.”  He is shocked of course he has something to be sorry for, he has a lot to be sorry for, some things you don’t even know about. 

“ No, I do.” He swings his legs off of the bed so that he is sitting in front of you. The position reminds him vaguely of the one you were in, in his studio, when he so badly wanted to kiss you. He still remembers the emotions, the intense want to hold you close, and he feels it now as well. 

“Yoongi maybe you should lie down.” He almost wants to laugh at that, he really doesn’t care about laying down right now.

“ You know I really hated you.” You stop and stare at him. Okay, maybe not the best way to start his confession.

“What?” He flinches a bit at you, but he continues on.

“ Yeah I did, you were a pain in my ass, always storming into my apartment and fighting with me,” He continues, the words bubbling out and he for once doesn’t try to stop them. He looks away from you though, not being able to look you in the eye just yet, he needs to get his off his chest, and if he looks at you he knows he’ll falter.

“ And when Namjoon purposed this carpool thing I accepted because I was sure I could get you to give up, and never have to see you again. And you tried the same thing. I cursed you every time I had to go drop you off at your stupid classes or when you called me away from something important, I hated you even more.” You huff and cross your arms. He wants to stop and try again, but he started now, no backing out so he takes a breath in and goes on. 

“ But then,” He’s been staring off into the distance but now he meets your eyes. “Something changed. I don’t know how, I can’t pinpoint when it happened but suddenly calling you to come and get me wasn’t purely because I wanted to irritate you. Suddenly it was a way to see you. Of course, I didn’t admit this to myself at the time.” He shakes his head, thinking again how stupid he was. You're frozen under his gaze and he almost smirks, but there is no time to enjoy the way you blush under his stare. 

“I was stupid, I tried even harder to ignore you, and to fight you, to hate you. But you made it so hard.” He takes your hand again, intertwining your fingers this time. “ I kept trying to find the things that I used to despise you for, but it got harder and harder to find them. I found myself being jealous of the rest of the boys.” You quirk your eyebrow up at this, not understanding. “I was jealous about how easily you talked to them, I wanted you to tell all your stories to me too, I wanted you to be as casually touchy with me too, fall into my lap when you laugh too hard.” He can still feel the burning jealousy he had to press down whenever he saw the way you so easily interacted with his friends. The way Jungkook and Tae so easily touched you and you let them, the way you always laughed at Jin’s jokes and thanked Hobi with a kiss on the cheek when he sleepily made you your coffee. The way you always had these long conversations with Namjoon and the way you always hug Jungkook so tightly. He hated them for that he always thought it was because they were nice to you when you were the bane of his existence, if only he knew the real reason.

You want to say something but he holds up a finger to stop you. He can't stop now or else he’ll never get the words out.

“ I tried to drown those thoughts out of my brain, but the more I learned about you the harder it became.” He is leaning in closer to you. “ and I do know you, y/n. I know you hate your tennis talent because your parents made you play it. I know you prefer exactly two and a half marshmallows in your hot chocolate and that you write every poem by hand because it feels more authentic to you. I know that when you're sick you become a huge baby and that you like the colour purple because you couldn’t decide between blue and pink when you were younger.” he smiles when he thinks of all the ways he’s come to know you and it makes his heart warm.

He is just a few centimeters away from you now, your noses almost touching. Your eyes flicker down to his mouth, and he smirks.

“I have been a fool Y/n,” he whispers the words, afraid to say them too loud. “but god I can’t keep kissing other people pretending that it’s you.”

He smashes his lips onto yours, and he groans, your lips feel so soft and his imagination didn’t do them or you justice. He wants to pull away but you tangle your hands into his hair, pulling him closer. He smiles you really want him as much as he wants you, he pulls you onto his lap, but he flinches, pulling away, his brain screaming at him not to do so,  but the pain in his ribs is flaring up again.

You stare at him in concern and he chuckles, taking the opportunity to survey your face, he strokes your cheek. God, you are so beautiful, he can’t say that he ever forgot that, he hadn’t, you were one of the most beautiful people he's ever seen and he thought that since that day he met you. He couldn’t even stop himself from catching you when you fell then. 

He doesn’t give you time to speak before he is pulling you down and kissing you again, a soft kiss. You reposition yourself, straddling him. 

You keep kissing him until you’re both out of air and even then when you pull away it is only a few centimeters. He grins widely, his wild look reflecting on your face. 

“ I’m sorry I shouldn’t have just…” He feels bad that he just sprung a kiss on you, after what you went through he should have asked for consent.

To his surprise, you cut him off by placing a soft, quick kiss on his mouth. 

“ I think you’ve apologised enough for one day.” You smile and he kisses the tip of your nose, unable to stop himself.

“You know you stole my speech,” You say, and he frowns. “ I was going to say the same but you had to go first didn’t you?” 

“Is not, you’re lying.” He scoffs, once again he revels in the way this banter comes so easily now without any real menace behind it.

“ I am not lying.” You gasp.

“ You are.” He smiles.

“Is not.” 

“Is too.” 

“You’re an idiot.” You declare, pushing him on his non-hurt shoulder, he’s thankful that you remembered, but now when you call him an idiot he feels like he should add one more thing.

“Yeah,” he nods in agreement. “But now I’m your idiot.” He grins, pulling you closer, wrapping his arm around your waist as he stares up at you, your face brimming with happiness and he is so proud to say he is the one who put it here.

“Unfortunately.” You smile, leaning down. 

“Hey, that’s mean.” He pouts and he takes note of the way you seem to melt a bit. He smirks internally, he’ll have to remember that. 

“ O hush and kiss me.” You say leaning down closer. There is nothing that be would rather do than obey you right now.

“With pleasure.” He smiles again before pressing his lips against yours. You run your fingers through his slightly tangled hair. You lightly pull and he moans, causing you to chuckle into his mouth. He feels like he’ll never be able to get enough of you.

He pulls away, your noses touching, smiling goofily.  You look perfect, your eyes are sparkling and your cheeks a beautiful shade of pink, your lips puffy, he thinks he’ll keep kissing you forever to be able to see this look on your face every time.

“O my god.” You both look to the door, where Jungkook is standing with his jaw hanging open, before he groans. 

“Fuck, I owe Namjoon 40 bucks.” 

You and Yoongi look at each other a moment before you both burst out laughing. 

Yoongi guess Namjoon can thank him for that, but right now he couldn’t care less about Namjoon or anyone else for that matter, because he finally has you, and he would be damned if he is ever going to let you go again.

“O, please do come in.” He sarcastically replies. Your blood is boiling, and you barely hear the door close before you’re spinning around to face him.

His apartment looks the same as always, perfectly decorated, and clean. It makes you hate him even more.

You’ve known him for a while, and you wish you could say it’s been a pleasant experience but instead the way you became acquainted with the music major was anything but ideal.

Your stupid university decided that your apartment block’s parking was so conveniently close to the sport fields that the first team football players might as well just park there, while they build new parking for them. So subsequently a shortage of parking for the people actually living in the building arose.

You and Yoongi both moved in this year so unfortunately neither of you really knows who the one remaining parking spot belongs to. You like to believe that it has to be your apartment’s seeing as it is right outside your window. Yoongi however does not share the sentiment.

“So, what will it be this time? A cappuccino or a Latte?” Yoongi asks, his voice coming from the kitchen space, where he is currently standing with two cups in hand, eyebrow lifted.

“Hot chocolate please.” You snap back, as you cross your arms and impatiently tap your foot.

The drinks thing is a tradition that formed a while ago, after you both realised that the parking spot argument happened at least twice a week. You’ve tried going to the university board but unfortunately they didn’t really seem to care all that much as neither of you are part of any winning sports team. 

In the beginning you tried to be civil and set up a roster, but you quickly realised that neither of your schedules were very compatible with that. Both of you being night owls didn’t help the situation, so you started going for alternative tactics or as your friends call it, sabotage.

 It evolved from relatively harmless pranks like shaving cream on his windshield, and him throwing glitter in your exhaust pipe to more extreme things.

He parked you in right before a test and you out of spite didn’t move your car from the spot for weeks. It wasn’t until he had your car towed that you called a truce on the pranks and just decided that the weekly fights will have to be endured. Him being an absolute caffeine addict, and to your great displeasure being able to make great coffee, decided that if you are going to fight all the time he at least needs a drink to stay sane.

“I’m sorry I took the parking spot, I thought you had already left.” Yoongi sighs out, his hand holding an amazing cup of hot chocolate out to you, which you take with a roll of your eyes.

 “Left to where? It’s pouring!” You state, irritation seeping into your bones along with the warmth of the drink. Now it’s his turn to roll his eyes. 

“I don’t know maybe to one of the hundred parties you’re always going to, and then I park all the way at the other space, only for you to come Ubering in at three in the morning.” His voice isn’t raised with the accusation, he never raises his voice which only irks you more.

“O I’m sorry and all the times I’ve had to park two blocks away because you’ll be coming home late from the studio. Only to find out the next fucking morning you never did come home?” You throw back at him, trying to keep your voice as calm as his but not succeeding at all. You are so irritated, and your wet clothes and hair is starting to give you a headache.

Yoongi is ready to retort with probably another snappy comment when a ghostly groan cuts in, making you start and spill hot chocolate all over your hand. Great as if you need another bad thing today.

“Are you guys fighting again?” Namjoon asks, his head peaking over the back of the couch where he was probably taking a nap judging by his ruffled hair and red eyes. You in your rage completely overlooked the fact that Yoongi’s roommate might be here.

Namjoon is a year above Yoongi, and instead of music, his major is more botanically inclined. He spends most of his time in his greenhouse, doing god knows what. There are rumours however that he cooks up more than just petunias in there, and his calm and relaxed demeanour makes it all more believable. Nevertheless, whatever he is doing is working because he is one of the top students. Mix that with extra modules like math and physics he’s just very strange all around, except for his face, which is not strange but rather knee shakingly beautiful.

Namjoon surveys you and Yoongi. “Have you guys finally started dating?” He lifts his eyebrow at you both, who with the possibility of a groaning ghost, had jumped into each other’s arms, and in shock are still standing in the same position. He looks between you two and you follow Namjoon’s eyes from your face to Yoongi’s.

Upon realising how close you’re standing you push him away, with a little cough. His coffee comes sloshing out of his cup with the backwards movement. You have no idea how he managed to not spill it when he had jumped into the air.

“No, Joon we definitely did not start dating.” Yoongi groans, wiping the coffee from his shirt. “Like I would ever date her.” You roll your eyes, crossing your arms over your chest.

 “Yeah, believe me, that will never happen.” You can’t believe people keep suggesting that you and Yoongi should be together. His friends keep teasing him about it every time you come up in conversation, and yours are not much better on the subject either. 

Unfortunately, the nature of your fights does nothing to deter them, as calling each other in rage and storming into each other’s apartment, is apparently the new way to hit on someone. To you, their conviction that Yoongi and you are secretly in love with each other seems more like a mom telling her preschool daughter that the boy who threw her with a rock likes her.  

“O, well in that case Jungkook owes me money” Namjoon states casually not even trying to explain. You roll your eyes at him as he walks past you to the kitchen, but he doesn’t seem to see your face.  

“Sorry for waking you Joon, you know how she is.” Yoongi says, quirking his head to you, looking at Namjoon who is now pouring cereal into a bowl. It takes a moment for your brain to register what the asshole next to you just said.

“How I am? Excuse me, as if you haven’t been fighting with me at all.” You huff, glaring daggers at the cocky bastard, “No? I guess you calling me in the middle of class just to shout at me is fine, is it?” It would be so easy to just slap him, you can’t help but feel an itch to do so. 

“Please it wasn’t that bad.” He scoffs blowing the hair of his fringe from his face.

 “Wasn’t that bad…” you stammer in disbelief. “You idiot I got kicked out, while we were doing test prep, I nearly failed.”  You glare at him you don’t think you’ve ever really shown him any other facial expression.

“I called you to ask you why you weren’t fucking home when your car was in the spot.” He defends himself while throwing his hands up in the air. 

He stares at you waiting for an answer. You reel to find a good one, so you don’t have to tell him you went straight to class from some guy’s house. So instead, you do the sensible thing, you lie.

“Well maybe if you had told me you were going to need it I wouldn’t have accepted the ride from my friend.” You retort, trying not to waver from his eye contact, knowing it will be suspicious, but clearly, it doesn’t work. 

He scoffs “Your friend right, maybe you should carpool all the time with whoever you’re sleeping with and give me the parking spot.” He says, his eyes are narrowed at you, clearly irritated. You already have the reply on your tongue, the blush on your face rising with your anger.

“Wait.” Namjoon jumps in. He has been quietly watching you guys from behind the counter. Eating his cereal and following your argument with his eyes the way one would follow a tennis match. 

“I have the best idea.” He states with a grin on his face. Both of your heads turn to Namjoon to hear this magical idea.

 “Yoongi you’re completely correct,” he says as if you know what he’s talking about.

“I usually am, but about what this time?” Yoongi asks cockily and you have to resist the urge to gag. Namjoon just rolls his eyes, as if Yoongi is being incredibly stupid. 

“You just said it.” You and Yoongi share a confused glance. Namjoon finally realising that you’re clearly idiots, explain his idea the way you would to a two-year-old, word for word and slowly.

“You two should carpool together.”

“Joon what the fuck are you talking about.” Yoongi exclaims and for once you actually agree with him.

 “How can we carpool when our schedules don’t overlap at all?’ You ask irritated. You’re getting pretty tired of being in wet clothes, the urge to fight is gone and no matter how much you like Namjoon you honestly do not want to listen to stupid ideas right now.

“Listen I know it sounds weird but just hear me out okay?” He asks walking to stand in front of the couch and motioning impatiently for you both to sit down. After exchanging a look with Yoongi, you both follow his instructions.

Already expecting a fit from Yoongi for sitting on his too perfect couch with your wet clothes, you opt to sit on the armrest. You not so patiently wait for Namjoon, who is looking more and more like an evil genius ready to monologue his plan.

“Okay, so I know the roster didn’t work out, but what if you guys each get a week to park in the spot downstairs and then you switch.” His hands are flying around as he explains, gesturing with them, but you already see a flaw. 

“Okay, but what if I need to go somewhere? Walking all the way to my car at night isn’t exactly safe.” You comment, but at your question, Namjoon’s smile only grows, he has to be crazy to think this stupid plan would actually work. 

“Then the person whose car is in the parking spot has to drive you.” He states casually as if it is the most obvious thing in the world.

“Wait what!” You and Yoongi both exclaim at the same time. You have to drive each other around now? No way that’s happening. You look to Yoongi to see him in thought, he glances out of the corner of his eye at you and after a moment he nods. “Okay.” He states calmly, way too calmly for your liking.

“I’m sorry what? You can’t be serious.” You can’t believe he is agreeing, “We couldn’t even keep to a stupid roster, if you really think this will work then clearly you’ve been spending time in Namjoon’s greenhouse.” You look to the subject of your accusation who is only calmly watching you two from a chair he fell into, “No offence” you say to him, but he merely shrugs, a smile on his face, denying nothing.

Yoongi sighs and pinches the bridge of his nose, clearly just as tired of you, as you are of him. “Look the year is almost over and next year the parking at the sports field will be done being built.”

 He has a point but driving each other around still feels like a bad idea, but maybe, just maybe it can work out. 

You internally laugh at yourself. “Okay fine,” You give in to Namjoon’s delight, “but under two conditions.” You smile evilly at Yoongi holding up two fingers. You’ll make sure, that if this is going to happen, it will work out in your favour.

“The person to call it off has to park in the far-away parking spot for the rest of the year and,” You pause putting one finger down and wait for him to cautiously nod, “You have to start.” You smile, and after a moment he smirks at you. That stupid smirk that you want to wipe off his face. 

“Fine princess, you’re on.” He holds out his hand to you, to shake and make it official but you ignore it, jumping off of the couch and flipping your wet hair, splashing him with cold water droplets instead. 

“Okay, then I’ll see you tomorrow morning at seven for my first class.” You give Namjoon a wave who returns it and quickly make your way out of the apartment not listening to Yoongi shouting after you as you close his front door in his face.

 You suddenly feel much better. Your plan forms in your mind as you evil laugh once safe in your own apartment, the warm water of the shower washing away the cold. That parking spot will be yours. .

.

. “Morning sunshine” you sing-song, trying to pull the covers off of the grumpy man in the bed. “What the fuck are you doing in my room?” His morning voice is raspy, and he groans as he  desperately holds onto the covers. “Namjoon let me in.” You state simply, shrugging and letting go of the covers, You instead move to the window, blackout curtains hanging in front of it. “I didn’t ask how you got into my room,” he spits out trying to untangle himself from the covers that sprang back over him. “I asked what you are doing here”. He demands finally sitting up, looking at you as if you just insulted his whole family. His hair is messy and face is a bit swollen from sleep. Overall, he looks entirely too much like a cat that was waken up from a nap.

You shake your head and instead of giving him an answer you pull open the curtains, letting the early morning light stream into the room.

Yoongi screeches shoving his face into the pillow to protect his eyes from the sun. You roll yours at his dramatics, you’d think he was about to die from the way he was moaning.

“Come on you have to take me to class,” you pull the covers off him, this time he doesn’t fight it. Groaning he peeks at you from where he is still face-planted into a pillow.

 “You can miss one class.” He states turning his head away from you and the window.

 “I cannot miss this class dipshit,” you cross your arms and tap your foot getting impatient. “Unlike you, I have grades to keep up.” You smirk at him, “unless you want to call the deal off?”

Yoongi groans again and finally sits up. “I hate you, you know that right?” He glares at you, before blinking in the bright sunlight staring at the window personally offended by its existence and yours.

Now that he’s sitting up and rubbing his hand over his face and through his hair you’re quite sure he won’t go back to sleep. So, turning on your heels you walk out the door, throwing a sentence over your shoulder at him. 

“Get dressed or I’m going to be late.”

He throws quite a few curses after you, and you’re sure a few hand gestures to your back. You however just close the door, not giving in to your instinct to argue with him. You’re leaning on the door and looking at Namjoon who is laying on the couch, eating what looks like a brownie, and smirking at you.

 “What Namjoon?”

“Nothing.” He keeps smiling though. Stuffing the rest of the brownie in his mouth, he stands up from the couch. Your eyes follow him as he walks to the kitchen counter, where three potted plants are standing. They seem to be some kinds of flowers, you’re not completely sure what they’re called though.

 You’re just thinking to ask Namjoon when the door behind you swings open. You’re support gone you fall backwards. You’re about to fall into Yoongi’s chest where he is standing in the doorway.

You look at him in betrayal as he turns his body out of your way and a moment later you feel the hard unwelcoming wooden floor underneath you.

“Ouch.” You groan out, curling onto your side to get the pressure off the sore part of your back.

“Wow, princess you’re really falling for me hey?” he laughs as he merely steps over your body. You grumble after him. How dare he step out of the way? It would have been so easy just to catch you or even to just help you up off his bedroom floor.

“I hate you.” You grumble at him, as you try to stand up. “And stop calling me that!” You shout at him, clutching onto your head, you hit it harder than you thought. There is definitely a whole day headache waiting on you.

“I know” he smirks at you answering your first question, “and come on princess you’re going to be late, remember?” He opens the front door, giving you one last look before strolling out, his car keys spinning on his finger.

You huff again but walk to the door anyway, because he is right, you are going to be late, and you’re not going to back out of this class now.

Namjoon gives you a worried look as he gives you the bag you had thrown down when you came in.

 “You okay?” his voice is genuinely concerned, and you give him a smile.

 “I’m fine Joon, thank you.” He gives you one last smile before closing the door behind you.  

Yoongi is already sitting in his car, waiting for you.

The rain from last night has left the ground filled with puddles and the air is chilly from the still looming heavy clouds hanging from the sky. You’re glad you decided to opt for comfort over cute today because the outfit you had planned would have left you with even more bruises than you already have. 

You dodge the puddles, hoping over the last one almost falling on his stupid car, before finally yanking the door open and getting into the already heated up car. You’ve barely closed the door before he drives off.

“Where is your class?” he asks stopping at a red light. He hasn’t looked at you and this is the first time he’s spoken since you got in the car. You appreciate that, him not talking is about a thousand times better than when he speaks.

You sigh. “Just drop me off at the main gate.” 

He scoffs. “Are you sure you don’t want a personal escort to your class, princess?” You roll your eyes at the way he sneers the last word. He’s being more grumpy than usual and you’re getting tired of it.

 “Do you always attend your morning classes?” His voice is irritated. You look at him, glaring.

“Yes” Lies, you almost never attend them, but to get that parking spot you knew you had to hit Yoongi where it hurts, interrupting his sleep. So, to deter him from asking you any more questions, you turn your attention away from him, opting to look around.

You’ve never actually been in his car before, and you’re sorry to see it is just like his apartment, clean, perfectly organised, and even smells nice.

You look out of the window, before you get irritated again, sitting with your legs turned as far away from him as possible. The rain has started up again, a soft mist falling onto the university town.

You’ve been looking forward to university since high school, getting away from your stupid town and being able to start over has been an amazing experience and mostly you get along with everyone. Everyone but the man driving a bit too fast on the wet road for your liking.

You and Yoongi met at the beginning of the academic year. It was moving-in day and being able to move out of the university provided dorms and into the apartment building was an exciting and much-anticipated event. The building was still technically university-owned but now you could live alone and get away from the stupid rules of the dorms. 

The way you had met Yoongi was straight out of a rom-com as your friends like to describe it. Maybe if a romcom ended with them hating each other. You also know now that everything that happened was probably just a way to get into your pants. Because, unlike you trying to keep your escapades discrete, the string of people always leaving his apartment at ungodly hours confirm the many rumours of his playboy habits.

You had been carrying boxes up to your room when the carpet tripped you, causing you to tumble down. You were caught however by an, what you then thought, unbelievably handsome man. His eyes had been kind as he righted you again, bending down to pick up the boxes that had flown from your hands.

You remember how you had squealed and giggled with your friends about how sweet he was to carry the boxes for you all the way to your apartment. About how he had introduced himself and put his number in your phone just in case you ever needed anything. It was about a week after that, that you had your first fight in the hallway.

The car comes to a halt outside the main gate, and you open the door to get out immediately. You want to thank him but when the car door swings closed he drives off. You glare at his car for a good few seconds before remembering how far the class actually is, and how little time you have to get there. Pulling the hood of your hoody up to defend yourself from the misty droplets, you quickly walk to the class.

.

.

.

Your phone is ringing, cutting through the quiet bedroom, and waking you with a groan. You roll over, your hair all over your face, and you try to push it away to be able to see the name that is flashing on the screen. Once your tired eyes finally make out the letters on the screen you groan again. You debate just letting it ring, but you’re pretty sure he would hold it against you, so you slide the green circle to the side and press the phone to your ear.

“Yes, what is it Yoongi?” Your voice is raspy as you whisper and it’s quite clear that you were sleeping. You push the hair out of your face fully now as if it will help you be more awake.

 “I want you to come and get me.” He just states it, no asking or anything and it irks you. 

“Yoongi I dropped you off and you said you’re going to be there the whole night.” You raise your voice just a bit not wanting to wake up the guy sleeping next to you. He throws his arm over you and sleeps on, oblivious to the conversation taking place.

 “I know I said that but I want coffee, and the place I go to doesn’t deliver.” You roll your eyes and sigh, removing the guy’s arm from your waist you silently get up out of bed, the phone pressed between your shoulder and your chin. 

“Yoongi I was kind of in the middle of something.” You cast a glance at the shirtless man while you try to find your clothes. 

“I don’t care, come and get me unless you want to back out?” He clearly knows what he’s doing, and you are not going to give in that easily. 

“Fine, I’m coming.” You whisper yell and hang up, pressing the red button with unnecessary force.

You clench your jaw and run your hand through your hair in frustration. You breathe in and out, suppressing all the murderous thoughts in your brain, and instead focus on finding your pants. You jiggle into them and with shoes in hand you walk to the front door. 

It’s unlocked, you always tell them to keep the front door unlocked. You claim it’s because of claustrophobia but really you just want a way out if anything goes wrong. He didn’t wake up at all with your walking around, so you decide you’ll text him in the morning, or well later today seeing as it’s 2 am. 

You reach your car in record time and you’re pulling away before you can second guess if the parking spot is really worth all this.

It became your week yesterday, and he has been on your case ever since. You thought you were bad, but he’s already driving you out of bed on the first day.

 To be fair you were trying to be bad. You had him drop you off and pick you up for classes, you’ve never attended all your morning classes before, parties and even a chocolate run at midnight. He complained and glared, but he still bore it which you now see was probably because he was planning how he will torture you this week.

You bite your cuticle as you drive, your headlights illuminating the road and falling onto the reason for you being here, and missing morning after pancakes. 

Yoongi pulls open the door and gets in before you’ve barely even stopped. 

“The café is called Spring day.” No greeting, no nothing, just simply ordering you around. As if to make it any worse, the café he just ordered you to, is right down the block.

 “You could have walked.” You are irritated and you know he is delighted to see you getting worked up. 

“I wasn’t in the mood for walking.” He is looking at you out of the corner of his eye. “Sorry to drag you away from your plans.” He might be apologising but there is not an ounce of sincerity in his voice. In fact, he is being sarcastic, and it makes your jaw tick in frustration. 

“You sound very sorry.” You snap at him, turning to him, ready to literally kick him out of your car. He however is smirking. 

“Your shirt is on backwards.” Your eyes go wide, and you can’t help but blush as he raises an eyebrow at you. You hold his eye contact refusing to look away, he breaks it first, looking to the road in front and then back at you. 

“Are you going to drive?” You sigh and turn, putting your hands on the steering wheel. 

Like you said it’s only about a minute’s drive to Spring day café, so neither of you really has a chance to say anything more before the car is parked in front of the lit shop’s window. You didn’t even know it was open this late.

The sign on the door says otherwise, but Yoongi just waltzes in. You follow him cautiously, only to liven up when you see the familiar faces turn to you. 

“Y/n what are you doing here?” Jimin is sitting on the coffee bar drinking something that doesn’t really look like coffee. He bounces off to come greet you, throwing an arm over your shoulder. You just smile at him.

 “Yoongi wanted midnight coffee apparently.” You glare at the pale man now helping himself to the coffee makers, not caring about Jin, the owner, sitting at the counter. 

Taehyung is sitting at a table with his feet on top of it, his chair rocking back in froth as he balances on it. 

“Yoongi give the poor girl a break, clearly she was busy.” His eyes run over your shirt and you groan. 

You forgot about that. You pout at Taehyung, sticking your arms back in the sleeves and turning the stupid shirt around. 

“There, happy?” You cross your arms and Jimin laughs at you throwing his arm around your shoulder again. Taehyung gets up and joins him on your other side. 

“Don’t pout, we’re on your side remember?” He smiles at Yoongi who is glaring at you three over his cup of coffee. 

You met most of Yoongi’s friends through the occasions of storming into his apartment for fights. The first time they had stared at you open-mouthed, noodles halfway to their mouths. It took them about three seconds before they were introducing themselves, apparently already knowing who you were.

The only three you met by yourself are the two men who are now leading you to a barstool next to Jin and the youngest who isn’t here.

Jimin and Taehyung are in your English class. On the first day of class, they took it upon themselves to squish in next to you and talk the entire class. After that, they insisted on sitting next to you in every class. You couldn’t help but become friends with them. Their whispered comments turned from irritating to honestly very entertaining and funny. 

The first time you saw them in Yoongi’s apartment you made a big dramatic deal about them betraying you by being on Yoongi’s side of the parking spot war. They in turn made a big dramatic deal to show you they were on your side. They even helped you throw a bag of glitter on Yoongi’s car, but of course, he doesn’t know that. 

The youngest, Jungkook, you met one day when he was floating around campus completely confused and lost. You watched him walk around in circles for about ten minutes before you decided to take pity on him. 

Turns out he was looking for a class on the other side of campus, so you walked with him to make sure he doesn’t get lost again. On the way, you came across Namjoon who apparently knew Jungkook from when he tutored him. 

You left him in Namjoon’s care but afterwards when he was staring from the couch while you and Yoongi fought, and Namjoon ignoring it completely, he made a point to find you on campus, especially after he became friends with Jimin and Tae.

 Jungkook never took a side though and instead follows Namjoon’s lead in teasing you. He also happens to be one of the biggest supporters of the whole, “Yoongi and y/n are actually madly in love with each other,” thing.

“Where is Namjoon and Jungkook?” You ask, opting for sitting on the counter rather than the stool. 

“Namjoon is helping Jungkook study or something.” Hoseok is swirling around on his chair in circles, going faster and faster. Yoongi is next to him, watching him and finally reaching out a hand to stop his best friend from falling off of the spinning chair. 

“More like Namjoon is dragging Jungkook along in the library, poor kid.” Jin comments. He looks tired and you feel a bit guilty for keeping him here so late, but then you realise you aren’t doing anything. Technically it’s the other guys' fault. You all do laugh at him, knowing that he is most likely telling the truth. 

Jimin and Tae keep bothering you, telling you all about their week and everything they’ve been up to. Even some of the others join in however they all seem content to just listen to the two boys babble on. You are clutching your stomach sitting in Tae’s lap, where you fell into a few minutes ago, due to the aforementioned laughing when Yoongi,  eyes narrowed gets up from his chair. 

“Come on, I need to get back.” He looks at you. Waiting for you to spring into action but you just blink and stare at him. 

“No, you can walk.” You turn your head away. 

Everyone in the room is holding their breath already anticipating what is coming. Jungkook once told you that there is tension before you and Yoongi start fighting, almost like the air before a thunderstorm. 

“O, I can walk?” Yoongi’s voice is cocky, and you hate it. “Where was that attitude when I had to drive you one block to the store at one in the morning to get you chocolate?” 

You roll your eyes, getting up from Tae’s lap. He doesn’t even try to hold you back. “O because asking you to drive from the same fucking place is as inconvenient as calling me when you specifically said you’ll be here the entire night?” 

Yoongi scoffs. Walking closer to you until it would only take one step before you’re toe to toe. “The deal was that we drive each other around whenever the other needs to remember princess?” His voice is so condescending you can almost feel hatred radiating off from him. 

You won’t back down, not in front of everyone, and not to the bane of your existence. So, you take the step closer, you and Yoongi are chest to chest.  

“You agreed to this deal first, you being an asshole isn’t making anyone’s life easier.” You poke him in the chest, getting your point across. 

Yoongi looks at you, his eyebrow raised. “Let’s get one thing straight right now I’m not trying to make your life easier, I am trying to make my life easier, because I know you’ll give up, and then I won’t have to ever deal with you again.”

You’re eyes go wide for a moment, but his words don’t hurt, you don’t care. You’re trying to do the same thing. “Good, at least I know we feel the same. I won’t give up, but I will make your life a living hell, and when you give up, the real reward will be that I never have to see you again.”

You both stand there for another second, chest to chest, glaring at each other. 

“Drive me back.” Yoongi says it word for word, empathising each one, not breaking eye contact. 

“Get in the car.” You say in the same way, glaring at him, your faces are inches apart, and your eyes don’t move from each other, challenging one another. Hatred and dislike reflecting in each of them, the tension in the air that Jungkook talked about is growing, stifling you both until Jin finally clears his throat, and it disappears.

You blink and finally look away, turning to Taehyung and Jimin both staring at you, a smirkish look on both their faces. 

“I’ll see you guys later,” you turn to the other two men, “Thank you Jin, see you Hobi.” You catch your car keys that Jimin threw, and storm to the door, yanking open your car door and already starting your car as soon as you close the door behind you. 

Yoongi gets in a few minutes later, and you drive off, faster than you usually would to get the cocky ass out of your sight as soon as possible. 

“Get out.” You sneer at him as soon as your car stops. He doesn’t protest, getting out and slamming your car door very hard. You flinch at the loud sound, rolling down your window, to yell at the retreating man’s back. 

“Don’t slam my doors asshole.” He doesn’t answer just throws his middle finger back at you. You roll your eyes, deciding it's not worth it, and you drive back home.

The convenience of parking right in front of the door is enough to lighten your mood tremendously, and once in your apartment you realise how icky you feel, so before falling into your bed, you take an extremely very hot shower. 

The shower doesn’t clear your head as much as it usually does. All you can keep thinking about is the idiotic man that you have to go pick up in a few hours. You used to think that maybe you could get along one day, maybe when you both have parking spots, but after what he said tonight clearly that won’t happen.

 The fights and arguments since the carpool deal started have been becoming more intense. It hasn’t been this bad since when the arguing started. You feel that you and Yoongi have fallen into a routine of fighting and now that you’re forced into close proximity it is intensifying the irritation and hatred that have evolved between you two. 

Your skin is still red when you get out of the shower. The cold air meets your body, cooling it down too fast for your liking. It is starting to get very cold and you’re sure the rain will turn into snow soon. 

You originally wanted to spend your day catching up on some work, maybe cleaning your apartment, but now you know you’re just going to spend the day catching up on sleep, before once again facing the most infuriating man you think ever existed. 

.

.

.

 The pounding on your door is synchronising nicely with the throbbing in your head.

“Y/n, open up.” The pounding continues on the door and in your head. “You were supposed to come fetch me hours ago.” Yoongi’s voice carries through the apartment, and you flinch at his words.

He’s right, you were supposed to go fetch him. Today is your last day as driver and you couldn’t be more than glad to have a break from Yoongi’s never-ending calls. When he said he’s going to make you give up he wasn’t joking, and you’ve been struggling to not do so. 

He has been calling you at all hours to drive him somewhere, and more than once he’s called you to go pick him up at someone else’s apartment. He comes strolling out, with lipstick marks all over his face and you have to try very hard to not gag at the sweet sickly stench of perfume that hangs around him.

The driving him around part you can manage, him calling you nonstop you can manage, you just scheme how you’ll retaliate next week. What you can’t manage however is the fact that he barely says a word other than giving you directions or orders. You would think you’d be happy with the silence and only talking when absolutely necessary, but it bothers you. Even when fighting with him he at least acknowledged your existence, now it just feels like you’re truly an Uber driver. The silence feels eerie, and you don’t like being seen only as a tool for him to get somewhere. You’re still a human being.

Speaking of you being a human being, all the driving around at all hours, and trying to study and get all your assignments done have been leaving one thing severely neglected. Yourself. 

You haven’t slept more than two hours at a time the whole week, and today it finally caught up to you. You’ve been feeling a bit sick since yesterday, but you didn’t want to give Yoongi an excuse to twist it around, that your asking for a day off is you giving up. So, you didn’t say anything but when you finally got home after another one of Yoongi’s midnight coffee runs, Jin and Hobi knows your coffee order off by heart now, you literally collapsed onto the couch where you are still laying right now.

Yoongi keeps knocking on the door and it takes a good minute for you to drag your very sore and weak body up to open it. When you do, you see a very smug Yoongi, clearly ready to tell you that he wins.

“Princess, you do know that you not picking me up means that I… hey are you okay?” He trails off from his original speech, his smug look fading as his eyes roam over your very pale face and notice how you’re leaning on the doorway for support.

“Y/n are you sick?” He frowns. He sounds concerned and you really don’t feel up to pretending you’re not sick when you feel like you’ll fall over from a light breeze.

“Yeah.” Your voice is hoarse, and it hurts to talk, you can see his frown deepening.

“Sorry for not picking you up Yoongi.” You push yourself off of the doorframe, getting ready to just face defeat and retreat to your comfy bed, or couch rather, you don’t think you can make it to your bed.

As soon as you’re erect however your eyes go black for a moment, stars dance in the air and you feel yourself stumble. You’re righted by a hand on your shoulder. Your fuzzy eyes take a moment to return to normal and the head rush passes. You blink a few times before you’re able to focus again and when you do the sight that greets you is a strange one.

 Yoongi is standing closer than before, his hands are on your shoulders, but the strangest thing is his face. You and Yoongi rarely see each other with any facial expression other than glaring, so to see Yoongi’s brows furrowed and his eyes wide moving all over your face in concern is not something you’ve ever seen before.

“Y/n, come on let’s get you inside.” His voice is softer than usual, not very different, you doubt a lot of people would be able to really tell you the difference, but you hear it, the softness, and you’re startled by it. So much so that you don’t resist when he drags you to the couch. You sit down on instinct, and he throws one of the blankets surrounding you over your shoulders.

“Why didn’t you tell me you were sick?” His voice is stern, and you glance up at him. It sounds like he wants to fight, and you cringe at the thought of having to spend so much energy on arguing right now, but he’s waiting for an answer, so you give it.

“I didn’t think you would really care about that.”  You look at his face cautiously expecting to see the usual anger bubble up, and you can see it starting but he presses it down. Apparently, this morning is full of surprises. He bends down sitting on the coffee table in front of you.

“Y/n I know you see me as an asshole, but you should know, I’m not a monster.”

“Well, you certainly had me fooled this week, you barely talked.” You shoot back at him struggling to hide the pout, but you’re sick not dying so you succeed and this time you see he rises to the poking.

“Maybe I just wasn’t in the mood to fight, seeing as we clearly can’t even speak without fighting.” He stands up again, folding his arms.

“Well maybe if you acted less like a jerk then we wouldn’t have to fight all the time.” You counter. The pounding in your head is killing you and speaking is making your throat burn, him being here is only making it worse.

“Maybe I only act like a jerk because your personality brings out the worst in me.” He snaps, not raising his voice but sneering at you all the same. His words finally push you overboard.

“Listen here you asshole, you are the one that made me drive you around all night, so don’t blame your jerkiness on me you stupid ...” You push yourself up to be closer to his eye level before finishing the insulting names you plan to call him but immediately you feel the head rush again.

“Will you please for the love of all that is holy sit down.” He growls out and you frown at him, but once again you can’t argue, you really need to sit down, your head is spinning. “Now I am going to make you some tea, you’re going to drink it and sleep.”

“No,” you say glaring at him. He stares and sighs, pinching his nose bridge.

“Fine, be like that I’m only…”

“I want hot chocolate.”

Yoongi looks at you in surprise. “What did you say?”

You cross your arms and look him right in the eye. “I don’t want stupid tea. I want hot chocolate.”

Yoongi keeps staring at you for another moment, and you swear you can see a quirk of his mouth corner. He wants to laugh. But instead, he clears his throat and walks out of your front door. You stare in disbelief. He really just left.

You curse him out in your head. You were joking, kind of, mostly you were arguing just for arguing’s sake. You shake your head at the audacity and pull the blanket tightly around yourself. After a few minutes, you place your feet on the ground and prepare yourself to stand up when the door swings open, revealing Yoongi with a mug in each hand.

“I thought I told you to sit down?” He raises an eyebrow at you closing the door behind him as you sit back, secretly glad you didn’t have to stand up now.

Yoongi hands you one of the mugs, which you take to survey its content. You’re expecting the clear greenish liquid of tea, but you’re met with warm chocolatey goodness, two and a half marshmallows melting slowly on top. You look to where he is sitting in your one armchair.

“Hot chocolate.” You state.

“Hot chocolate.” He nods and you can’t help but give him a smile, probably one of the firsts ever.

He merely surveys you over the rim of his cup as he drinks. His hot chocolate is really the best you’ve ever tasted and combining that with the absolute exhaustion you’ve barely finished the cup before you’re sleeping soundly.

After that, things seem to shift a bit, not a lot, most people don’t even notice it except maybe Namjoon who according to Jimin upped his bet against Jungkook. You and Yoongi still argue but compared to the previous weeks it’s not nearly as heated and more importantly, after the chilly silence that shrouded you the arguing is a bit welcomed. 

What does change however is the fact that you two actually talk, it’s not much but it feels completely different, even if most of the conversations still end up in an argument.

The arguments become less personal, of course, you still hate each other but after the olive branch that was the hot chocolate when you were sick, his company has become almost bearable to you, almost.

.

.

.

“Yoongi I want to go home.” You’re whining you know but you’re tipsy and tired. Your feet hurt from all the dancing and you’re glaring at the softly blurring form of the black-haired man who is driving. 

“It’ll be quick” he retorts, he’s irritated, you can tell by the set of his jaw. 

“Stopping at your studio is not quick it’s out of the way.” Your voice is drawling a bit and you roll down the window. The cold air helps the fogginess disappear and you  focus on it so much that you barely realise you’ve stopped in front of the music department building. So much for winning the argument.

Yoongi turns to you while he rolls up the window. You turn around, your cheeks and nose red from the cold air and your eyes more alert than it’s been the whole drive here. He clears his throat to get your attention and your head snaps to him. 

“Do you maybe want to…” he hesitates and looks away pulling out the keys from the ignition. You stare at him not sure what he is going to say but you are definitely not expecting him to say, “Do you want to come up with me?” 

You think for a second before nodding. “Well, I don’t want to sit in the car.” He rolls his eyes and gets out of the car. You follow, a bit wonky on your sore feet still stuffed into the stupid high heels. You walk a bit behind him, letting him lead the way.

 He invited you to his studio, he’s never done this before and when you step through the door you feel like you’re almost intruding. You’ve been in each other’s homes more times than you can count but his studio feels more personal, more intimate and you’re unsure what to make of it. 

“You can sit down, I just need to transfer this file.” He states as he moves over to the computer, pushing his office chair to you. You sit down as he requested and take the opportunity to look around the room. The music majors can hire out a studio room for the year. Most people don’t go to the trouble, but Yoongi has fully made the space his own. The furniture is dark and the soundproof black sponge lining the walls darkens the space even more. The only light breaking the darkness is the blue LED strips running around his desk. 

“Why did you put so much effort into your studio?” You wonder out loud. He looks at you over his shoulder, his profile illuminated by the computer screen and for a second you remember why you thought of him to be so handsome when you met him. 

“What do you mean?” He asks, looking back at the screen and continuing what he was doing.

“I just mean, most people don’t put so much effort into a room you won’t be using for that long,” You spin around on the chair as you speak. “Most people just put effort into their apartments.”

“Well, I don’t like working at home.” 

“Why not?” You ask without giving it much thought, you’re stopped from spinning more by a foot appearing on the seat. “Maybe because I am constantly disturbed at home by a certain someone.”

You glare ready to fight and defend yourself when you see his face. It’s not his usual arguing face, his one eyebrow is raised and there is a slight quirk to his mouth. You haven’t seen him looking like this, he looks playful. 

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” The reply slips out and you blame the past week of having conversations with him that had minimal arguing in them. You stare at him though, challenging him to say something snarky, but he merely laughs. You don’t know if it’s by accident but his foot on the seat next to you pulls the chair closer to him. You stare up at him, now almost against his body. He stares at you too, his eyes surveying your face.

“Of course, you don’t know.” He says it with a smirk, the joke continuing but you feel like the mood’s changed, like that static before your arguments. His eyes are stuck on your face, and he is leaning in slightly. You don’t know if you’re imagining it or if he’s also aware of it. You’re about to reply when a ding from the computer pulls his eyes away from your face and you feel able to breathe again. 

He pulls the USB from the slot and walk past you after switching the computer off. “Come on princess or do you expect me to carry you down.” The snap is back in his voice, and you roll your eyes standing up and walking past him down the hall, not waiting for him. 

He catches up quickly though, you’re still not able to walk properly because of your shoes.

“Why are you walking so god damn slow?” He snaps at you, falling into step beside you. You glare at him.

“My shoes are killing me, you might feel sorry for me if you had an ounce of sympathy for anyone.” You snap back, irritated at his change of behaviour, but comforted by the fact that whatever happened back there was just a moment of something stupid, nothing to think or wonder about.

“Right, I am so sorry princess that your poor feet are hurting,” His voice is high pitched, sarcasm dripping in it. You glare at him out the corner of your eye as he continues. “because of the stupid shoes you chose to wear.” His voice returns to normal, but the insane amount of sarcasm remains, and you scoff finally having had enough. You stop and rip the shoes from your feet, stomping out of the building all the way to the car.

You wait outside of the passenger’s side door for him to unlock the car. Your feet and body are freezing as you stand on the cold concrete. Yoongi comes waltzing out of the building a few seconds later, twirling the keys around his finger as he slowly descends the stairs. He could unlock the car from where he is but because he is an asshole he only unlocks it when he is at the driver’s door.

“Climb in princess.” Is the only thing he says as he gets in the car and if it was a warmer night you would have refused to do anything this infuriating man said to you. Unfortunately, it is not a warmer night, and your feet are turning red with cold. So reluctantly you get into the car just before he speeds off.

You ignore him the rest of the drive home, irritated and angry. The feeling is so easy to sink into, you almost feel bad, but then you look at his face, and the infuriating feeling takes over completely. He is just so frustrating, and it makes you want to scream sometimes.

The car stops in the parking spot, and you jump out as fast as you can. Walking into the building with your shoes in hand you completely ignore the man walking just behind you.

He stops at his door but doesn’t go in until he calls out with a giggling voice. “See you tomorrow for your class.”  People are staring at you, you understand why, you’re walking shoes in hand in a party dress with your mortal enemy screaming about seeing you the next day. 

You zap him without turning around and burst into your apartment, rage bubbling up. You fall onto the couch, pushing your face into a pillow and you let out a scream of frustration. The sound is muffled by the material, but you feel better after letting it all out. 

Tonight has been a rollercoaster and for once it only applies to things happening after the party. The way he invited you into his studio,  you’re sure that isn’t something that happens often. You play with the frills on the edges of the cushion. Maybe he was trying to be nice, maybe you should try to do the same. You roll onto your stomach and press your face into the cushion again at the thought. He was nice and polite and suddenly something happened that you will not think about. No, you will only think of how irritating he is with his stupid face and stupid smile. You scream again.

.

.

.

“Maybe we should pull over Yoongi.” 

The rain is flooding the street and the wind is blowing so hard you’re scared the whole car will be blown away at any moment.

“It’s fine,” Yoongi scoffs rolling his eyes at you. You’re about to retort when the hail begins. With a glance at you, Yoongi sighs. 

“Okay maybe just for a moment.” He pulls the car over under a tree. “I’m sure the storm will blow over soon.” He says wistfully, turning the ignition off. 

“Yeah let’s hope so,” you stare out the window at the sheets of rain that keep assaulting the car. 

It’s quiet, you two being quiet is nothing new, but usually, during the short drives you talk, but now, stuck with each other for who knows how long you’re not sure what to say. You don’t want to start a fight accidentaly by saying the wrong thing, because that will just make the situation worse seeing as neither of you have a place to storm away to. So instead of speaking, you look around the car searching for something polite to talk about.

“What is your favourite colour.” The question bursts from your mouth, and you bite your lip, cautiously looking at him to see his reaction. He stares at you in surprise before smiling and then he starts to laugh. 

You stare at him now, your head tilted and your eyebrow raised at his weird reaction. His laughter bubbles down to a chuckle and he clears his throat when he realise how you’re looking at him. 

“Sorry, it’s just you trying to make small talk is  funny.” He tries to explain. 

“Well, I’m sorry.” You scoff. You can’t believe him, you’re just trying to be polite at least. 

“I didn’t mean it like that,” You give him a distrusting glare, but he continues. “I promise.” He turns to you, unbuckling his seatbelt to turn fully in his seat.

When he sees you’re not going to say anything further he tilts his head until he is in your sight. 

“To answer your question.” he smiles lightly, “ My favourite colour is purple.” 

You glance at him. “Mine too.” 

“Really?” He pulls away a bit and he laughs, “ I didn’t know that.” 

You glance at him again, before relaxing your posture. You turn a bit more towards him. 

“We don’t really know a lot about each other.” You state. Thinking about it, it is strange, you spend so much time together, you technically share friends, and you are in each other’s homes often, and yet you know almost nothing about him.

“You’re right,” he sounds a bit surprised, “ well we have time, why don’t you tell me about yourself?” 

You look at him fully now. He seems to be in a good mood, and you don’t think you’ll be able to handle the awkward silence the entire time. So why not get to know your nemesis just a bit. 

“What do you want to know?” You ask cautiously, still not completely trusting that this isn't some prank.

“O uhm,” he thinks for a second. “ What are you studying?”

“Really?” You chuckle a bit, you have no idea why this is so funny, maybe because it is so foreign behaviour for you two.

“Yeah, you know what I study, but I have no idea what studying  I’m always dragging you away from.” He smiles brightly at you, encouragingly. “Also I don’t think I’ve ever come across a major that has so many early morning classes.”

You chuckle. “English,” he tilts his head slightly, “I want to become a writer.” you explain as if to justify it. “I know it’s a stupid dream to have, but it’s been mine since childhood.”

“So no wanting to be a princess or actress?” he asks, his head still tilted.

You shake your head. “Nope, I’ve always wanted to write poetry.” 

“Poetry,” he sounds surprised, leaning back a bit, and you just nod. He stares straight ahead of him, and you take that as the cue that the conversation is over so you turn back to the window, to look at the rain.

“I don’t think that is a stupid dream.” He says suddenly and you turn back to him. 

“You don’t?” You don’t really believe him.

“Yeah, I mean, I’ve wanted to be a music producer since I was a child. How is that so much different than wanting to write poetry,” He turns his head to you while speaking. he smiles softly at you in reassurance. “If anything I think it’s amazing.” 

You stare at him. No one has actually ever said that to you. Most people just act surprised and brush it off, not wanting to be the one to tell you how unrealistic it is. He looks sincere and it makes your heart clench a bit, you can feel a burning in your sinuses, but you swallow the tears away.

“ Thank you,” you whisper, afraid to speak too loudly and have your voice crack.  He stares at you, not in surprise but with a soft stare, his eyes warm and you can’t believe he is directing that look at you. 

You clear your throat, unbuckling your seat belt you turn your body fully, putting your feet on the seat and hug your knees to your chest leaning on the closed door.

“ How about your parents?” He frowns in confusion at your question. 

“What about them?” 

“Are they supportive of your dream?” You clarify.

“O,” his face turns into a gummy smile and you can’t help but stare at how pretty it makes him look. “Yeah, they are very supportive. My mom took me to music classes every week, and my dad helped me soundproof the guest bedroom to work in.” He smiles larger while he talks about his parents and all their help. “How about your parents?” he asks he looks genuinely curious.

“Uhm,” You try to figure out how to exactly say it. “They don’t really care for it.” You don’t look him in the eye. “They wanted me to be a lawyer. I applied here because of the amazing English program, and I got in on a tennis scholarship, so my parents didn’t have to pay.” 

“Wait tennis?” He is shocked you can tell without even looking at him. 

“Yeah I’m actually really good, but god Yoongi,” You turn back to him, “ I fucking hate tennis.” You chuckle out the words so glad to finally be able to say it to someone. He stares before he starts laughing, causing you to laugh harder. 

You both just sit there laughing in the car, with the rain pouring down around you, and the wind blowing through the big old tree you’re parked under. You laugh until your stomach hurts. 

“So I dropped it, with the excuse that my studies are too much.” you continue after you calmed down a bit. “But that means my parents have to pay my tuition now, so the deal is they keep paying if I keep getting good grades.” You finish kind of sadly, they really don’t support your choice of major and it has always hurt you.

“That’s why you are so anal about tyour grades?” Yoongi guesses, and he is right, so you just nod. He bites his lip in thought a moment.

“Well,” Yoongi takes your hand sensing how sad you really are about the subject, “You’re here now, and you’re doing what you love, and you seem to be balancing your studies with partying,” You roll your eyes at the teasing bit, “no but really you’re following your dreams, that’s a big win, and it makes you very brave for doing it.” he smiles reassuringly at you and you return it after a moment. His words actually do make you feel better and the weight of his hand around yours reassures you even more. He is right of course, you are studying what you want, and you are following your dreams, it is something to be happy about. 

“Thank you Yoongi.” You squeeze his hand lightly in thanks. 

“Don’t even mention it.” He squeezes back. “I’d like to read some of your poetry sometime, maybe they make good song lyrics too.”

“Really?” He nods at your question. You have thought about it in the past but overall you never actually tried writing songs, maybe you should try. 

“Okay, maybe that’s where my true talent lies.” You chuckle. 

“Hmmm,” Yoongi hums out, leaning back in his seat, looking at the rain that is a lot calmer now, the hail has also cleared up. 

“ I guess we should get home?” He words it as a question, and you kind of want to say no, you realise with a shock you want to keep it like this. No arguing or snappy comments, just talking. But you doubt it could ever truly be like that, Yoongi has made it clear he can’t stand you and wants this deal to be over so that he can be rid of you. So instead you pull your hand away and nod. 

He merely nods as well, the silence returns and he drives out from underneath the tree.

 You stare at your hand. You already miss the warmth of his. You shake your head, you can’t feel that way, you’ll only get hurt.  

You get out of the car as soon as it stops in the parking space. You don’t look back at the man following you to your floor, you don’t want to know how his face looks. Is he sad that you pulled away? Or is he relieved to be away from you? 

You rush through your door, closing it tightly behind you. Resisting the urge to look at Yoongi. You sigh as you sit on the floor. What on earth just happened?

.

.

. 

The music is loud and the cup in your hand is already empty again. You’re dancing chest to chest with one of your friends, you’re both screaming the words to the song playing. You came out with them tonight, Yoongi is going to some club with his friends leaving you to drive with yours. 

Your brain is right on that edge of being tipsy and drunk and you revel in the feeling, all your responsibilities and worries melted away by the alcohol. 

The next song comes on and taking that as your cue you scream to your friend that you’re going to the bathroom. She merely nods, drunker than you are and you leave the dancefloor heading up the stairs wonkily. 

Your legs are struggling to move but somehow with a lot of concentration you make it all the way up. 

You know the house well, having been to multiple parties here in the past. You walk to the bathroom. The door is open and the light illuminates the otherwise dark landing.

 You’re halfway there when a voice calls your name, making you turn around, the action causing you to lose your balance but you’re righted by the arms gripping you tightly. You look up, the face that greets you is not the one you want to see. His face isn’t as pretty, his eyes not as perfect and there is no gummy smile adorning his mouth. Instead, the face belongs to the football captain. You had once found his face the epitome of attractiveness and due to that, you have hooked up a few times.

He helps you stand on your feet again, but his hands don’t release your waist and after a minute you push away from him. 

“Hey, what are you doing?” He asks with a teasing edge to his voice, he’s always teasing, you used to like that as well. 

You shake your head at him. “I’m a bit too drunk for this.” 

You know what he wants, what he always wants but you do not feel sober enough to consent and honestly seeing him again now you’re having trouble pinpointing why you liked him so much.

“Ag no come on.” He pulls you against him again, this time with a bit more force, and you stumble, off-balance.

 You shake your head, uncomfortable in his arms. “Why don’t we go somewhere a bit more private?” He whispers in your ear, and you can smell the alcohol on his breath.

You shake your head again, more sober than you were a moment ago, all your instincts flaring up.

 “No, I really don’t want to.” You push him away again, this time walking past him as you do so. He however grabs your arm, your wrist being crushed as he drags you back.

“Come on, don’t be like that, I promise you’ll like it.” He is smiling at you, but it makes the hairs on your neck stand up.

“Let go, you’re hurting me.” You try to pull away, but he only holds on tighter, causing tears to spring to your eyes.

“Don’t be difficult Y/n.” He is tugging you further down the hall, his voice is impatient.

“Let go of me.” You try to release his grip on your arm by clawing at his hand, but it doesn’t budge. 

Instead, he pushes you to the wall, groping your ass, and slamming your head against the wall painfully. Your arm is pressed above your head, as he leans in, smiling at you, surveying the way you’re struggling to getaway. 

Your head is shaking from side to side as you kick and try to make him back off, but he is so much stronger than you, and when he grabs your face you can’t do anything at all. 

“Just relax it’ll feel good if you do.” He whispers before pressing his lips onto yours and sticking his tongue down your throat. 

His hand travels up your skirt and you try to push him away again, biting hard into his lip. The shock makes him release you and you run down the hall on wonky legs, but he grabs you again. He is outraged now and you’re shaking in his hold, tears streaming down your face. 

You’re about to be dragged back again when a voice has both your heads swinging to the stairs.

“What’s going on here?” Your friend is looking from your teary face to his hand clenching your wrist. 

“Nothing, just mind your own business.” Comes his authoritative voice, but you’re staring at your friend willing her to please help. She gets your signal because she steps closer.

 “Y/n why don’t you come down with me, everyone is waiting.” She looks at him when saying those last words, and you almost cry from relief when he lets you go. 

You don’t waste any time quickly walking down the stairs, your friend's arm around you guiding you down the steps.

As soon as you’re in the crowded room she turns to you, inspecting your face, frowning. “Are you okay?” she looks at your arm, but you pull it away, “Did he hurt you?” You merely shake your head, too stunned to speak, still in shock.

“Fucking bastard.” She says with a sneer, turning her head up to the landing, before turning back to your shaking form. “Do you want me to take you home?” Her face is soft and worried, and behind her you see her boyfriend waiting. You shake your head not wanting to inconvenience her.

 “It’s okay, I have someone I can call for a lift.” Your voice is shaky, and she frowns. 

“Are you sure? I can take you.” She insists but you shake your head again. 

“I’ll be okay, I just want to go outside to call him.” She follows you out and stands a bit away keeping you in her eyesight but giving you your privacy.

Your fingers are shaky as you press the call button, Yoongi’s number being at the top of your recent calls. Voicemail greets you again and again as you keep trying. You stare at your phone for a moment before pushing the call button again.

“Hi, Y/n” his voice greets you, and you let out a small sob in relief, “y/n is everything alright?” he asks clearly concerned and you shake your head, taking a shaky breath in. 

“Can you come pick me up please?”

Your friend waits with you until the car pulls up next to the curb. The driver gets out and walks over to you, his brow furrowing at your tear-stained face, mascara running down your cheeks. He gives you a hug when he’s close enough, and you let out little snivels into his chest. 

“Thank you Jungkook.” You whisper but he clearly hears you because he pulls away, his hair in a bun and big eyes assessing you, but he doesn’t ask the questions burning on his tongue. You appreciate that, not sure you can talk about it now. 

“Come on let me get you home okay?” You nod and he leads you to his car, opening the passenger door for you.

The drive back to your apartment is mostly quiet just filled with your snivelling once in a while and Jungkook’s worried stares. He turns to you fully when you’re stopped at a red light. The light is shining onto you both, giving the car a strange hellish look.Strangely appropriate.

 “Y/n, are you okay?” You feel your bottom lip quivering again so you bite it. You can’t speak so you just nod your head. 

“I don’t believe you. You’re stubborn but you never try to hide your emotions like this.” The red turns to green and he turns back to the road, the car moving again. He is much more serious than he usually is.

“I understand if you don’t want to tell me, and I’m glad you called me, I am, but I just want to know.” He looks at you before looking back to the road. “Why didn’t you call Yoongi?” He looks at you again, waiting for an answer, but you look out the window. 

You wipe away a tear and take a breath in. For the first time since you called Jungkook, you say something. 

“I tried.” You look down at your phone the time reading just past eleven. “He… he didn’t pick up.” Your voice cracks, but you swallow the tears down. You have to get a grip on yourself.

 Jungkook sighs, “I’m sorry Y/n, he probably turned his phone off after they went to his apartment.” 

He sounds very apologetic, but you can feel the numbness setting in now. Everything is drowned out but your brain catches onto something. 

“They?” You look at Jungkook who is pulling up in front of your building. He starts and realises what he said, he gulps and avoids looking at you. 

“Yoongi and a girl.” Jungkook cautiously looks at your expression, expecting to find rage there, that like always you’re going to storm in on Yoongi and fight with him and then you’ll calm down and probably have coffee. 

He doesn’t find that, instead, your expression holds something far worse. Nothing. You don’t frown or cry or look mad at all, that scares him.  

You feel the hurt mix into you along with the disgust and fear but it doesn’t rise at all. It doesn’t reach your eyes in the form of tears or your head in the form of rage. It just lies there, like everything dead and cold.

You thank Jungkook, an empty thank you, you want to hug him and tell him that you appreciate him so much, but instead, you can’t even muster a real smile for him.

The walk to your apartment is blurry and you don’t really register anything until Jungkook sets a cup of hot chocolate in front of you. He must have walked you up. He leaves after helping you put on a cardigan and saying that you can call him whenever you need something, anything.

You just stare at the black tv. 

You’re fighting, trying to keep the emotions away. Jungkook was right, you never hideaway your emotions. You cry when you’re sad and express your anger and irritation. You don’t pretend nothing is wrong when something is. So now when your body is trying to protect you, it feels strange and some part of you is seeking the emotions. Trying to wake them up, digging through the darkness they borrowed into. Another part is fighting against it, hiding it deeper away, knowing that if you find them it might be too much. You are aware however that there are three distinct emotions hidden.

The first is fear, the fear of what could have happened if your friend didn’t find you in time. The fear that suffocated you when that creep had pinned you to the wall, how helpless you felt.

The second is guilt. You feel guilty that you ever put yourself in that situation. Guilty that you drank so much and maybe you shouldn’t have worn such a short dress.

The third is hurt. Hurt that the person you had spent the past few weeks with trying to drive each other crazy had actually left you. Hurt that clearly you haven’t been getting as close as you thought. Hurt that the few weeks making the fighting and hate of the past year melt away was only clear to you. Hurt that he didn’t care and hurt that you’re realising that you care too much.

You’re struggling to keep it all away, sitting on the couch not moving. Not touching the hot chocolate because you know it won’t taste as good as his.

There is a knock at your door and for the first time since you moved in you use the peephole, just to make sure who is on the other side. As if you summoned him by thinking of his hot chocolate, Yoongi is standing outside your door. By instinct when you see him you open it.

He looks out of breath. His eyes are worried but the rest of his appearance makes the hurt bubble a bit.

His hair looks ruffled as if someone had been tugging at it. His silk shirt was clearly thrown on in a haste, the buttons not lined up with the right holes. 

You look at his face. His cheeks are a bit too pink, and his lips are swollen, and red. You’ve seen this look on too many men to know what it means and if you were able to feel right now you would be angry and sad.

“Y/n are you alright?” He is surveying your face, his eyes darting across it. “Jungkook called me, he said you asked him to take you home. That he…he was worried about you.” You just nod.

 “I’m fine.” You get the sentence out without letting the emotions you’re starting to lose a grip on follow it.

“Are you sure? You don’t look fine.” He is standing closer, and you wish he wouldn’t, his presence is making it harder not to cry.

“I’m sure I’m fine Yoongi, just go.” Your hand is searching for the doorknob to close it. Yoongi follows your arm movement confused when suddenly he gasps.

 “Y/n” he grabs your arm. At first, you think he is trying to stop you but you see he is looking at the purple bruised skin. Finger shapes clearly visible in the tender flesh. 

You stare at it. Suddenly the hallway is dark and you’re being pulled away, your arm is pressed above your head, and you’re completely helpless.

“Let go.” You scream, and as soon as the words leave your mouth you’re back in the doorway of your apartment, Yoongi staring at you in shock, his hand dropping from your arm immediately.

“Y/n, who did this.” His words are laced with rage. “Y/n,” He takes a breath in trying to calm down, trying to not scare you, “please tell me who hurt you.” You shake your head, cradling your arm to your chest.

“It doesn’t matter alright, just leave me alone.” You can feel the tears coming, your lip trembling and your nose burning. Yoongi however doesn’t turn and leave, instead, he takes a small step forward.

“Y/n I don’t know what happened, but why don’t we go inside hmmm?” His brow is furrowed in worry. “Why don’t you let me take care of you?”

You stare at him. You really want to give in. You can see yourself fall into his arms, see him carry you to the couch and hold you as you cry, telling you it’s going to be okay as you tell him what happened. You so badly want to tell him what happened and have him chase away the badness. You want him to make you hot chocolate, his hot chocolate that always makes you feel alright. You want to give in.

You’re close to doing so when your eyes catch on his shirt again, the bruise on his neck and you swallow. He isn’t yours to be comforted by. So, you take a step back, back into your apartment, your hand on the door. He watches you, waiting for you to let him in. Instead, you shake your head. 

“Leave me alone Yoongi.” He stares at you.

 “Y/n please…”

“Leave me alone!” The tears are finally breaking from their bonds and you’re screaming again, your emotions found. 

“I’m calling it off okay, this stupid deal, you can have the parking space, now just leave me alone and go back to whoever you were going to fuck tonight.” You swing the door closed. 

The hurt that was written on his face now courses through you as everything breaks. Everything that happened, that could have happened and what didn’t happen. 

You slide to the floor sobbing. The knocks at the door and your name being called, end only after a neighbour comes out to complain. When it does you return to the couch, picking up the cup of hot chocolate. 

You sob again because you were right, it doesn’t taste anything like his.

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.

Your boots crunch through the snow. The sidewalk is slippery and you walk carefully,  trying not to fall. You’re almost at your apartment building. As you pass the empty parking spot you look away. 

You haven’t spoken to Yoongi since that last fight when you called the deal off. You haven’t told anyone what happened that night, however, your friend with your permission did send in an anonymous complaint to the school board that is apparently being investigated. Your friend has also been very supportive and you have been working through everything over the past few weeks. However, you still feel guilty about how you screamed at Yoongi and in the same breath you also still feel hurt. 

You know you have no reason to feel hurt, it’s not like you were in a relationship with him. He is free to do as he pleases, and yet you can’t shake the betrayed feeling, no matter how hard you try. 

The parking spot was occupied by his car for a while but for the past few days, it has been completely empty. Your phone has also been ringing non-stop again.

The boys keep messaging and calling you, more intensely than before, but you have been ignoring them. You feel stupid for how you reacted but you’ve been feeling so numb you haven’t had the energy to deal with any of them. You have even been skipping classes you share with Jimin and Taehyung. 

Eventually, they stopped but a few days ago they started up again. You almost want to answer and ask them why, but you don’t, you’re way too stubborn for that. 

Yoongi however hasn’t called or messaged you once since that night and you understand why, but once again it hurts. You know you’re being just as stubborn as he is, and yet you feel like he messed up just as much as you have, he can at least try.

Your freezing hands struggle with the keys to your apartment. You hear a door open somewhere down the hall and instinctively you start moving faster, just in case it is Yoongi. You do not want to face him, you refuse to.

“Y/n?” You hear your name being called and you freeze, you hear hurried footsteps approach and you try harder to unlock your door. It swings open and you rush inside closing it. 

A hand catch it just before it closes. You stare as it opens to reveal a frowning Namjoon. 

“Why are you ignoring us?” He cuts straight to the point and you swallow guiltily. He steps into your apartment closing the door behind him. 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”  You go on the defence, feigning ignorance.

Namjoon scoffs crossing his arms. “Please Y/n don’t try and play dumb we have been trying to call you.” 

“I must have missed your calls.” You remove your jacket and boots, trying to ignore his presence. 

Namjoon grabs your phone from your jacket pocket. You forgot to remove it before taking the jacket off. 

“Clearly.” He turns the phone to show the 40 missed calls from them, except Yoongi of course. 

“Listen Namjoon I thought you got the message when I didn’t answer,” You cross your arms staring at him now. You’re getting irritated. “I don’t know why you have started up again so drastically.”

“Because…” He starts but you cut him off.

“Besides I don’t understand why you are trying to call me, Yoongi can do it himself.” You glare at Namjoon. You’re not used to glaring at him, it feels strange. 

“We told him not to, to give you space,” Namjoon explains, and you frown for a second. If that’s true it makes sense why he didn’t call you beforehand, or why he hasn’t tried to visit. He takes what they say very seriously, you know that.

“Well, I still don’t understand why he can’t call now.” You argue, going back to glaring. If they all are so insistent to reach you now, why isn’t he part of them?

“Because..” Namjoon starts to answer but you interrupt him again.

“And for that matter, he lives five doors down, if you can come to visit me why can’t he?” You are angry now, not at Namjoon but at the stupid man who is probably at someone else’s house, doing god knows what. “And…”

“Y/n!” Namjoon interrupts you. You stare at him in shock. You’ve never heard Namjoon raise his voice, never mind at you. 

“Just listen please,” He says in his normal calm tone. “There is a good explanation for all of this.”

You nod for him to continue, still a bit in shock at hearing Namjoon scream.

“The reason why we’ve been calling all the time, and he hasn’t is because, well,” Namjoon pauses as if to brace himself before continuing, “  Y/n Yoongi was in a car accident a few days ago. He hit the ice wrong and crashed into a tree.”

You gasp, eyes huge in shock. “What!” All anger at Yoongi flies out of your body and intense worry and guilt take over. 

“Is he okay?” 

“When did it happen?”

You assault Namjoon with questions. Your breathing is coming too quickly, and you can feel tears running down your face as all the possibilities of what could have happened run through you.

“Wow Y/n, breathe” Namjoon holds you by the shoulders leading you to the couch where you sit down, still hyperventilating. You feel a panic attack coming on and Namjoon senses it too. 

“Hey, breathe with me okay.” You nod looking at him, “Deep breath in, and out.” You follow his breathing and soon you’re calming down, the tears lessen and your breaths come slower. 

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to react that way.” You sniff. Namjoon hands you a tissue, and you blow your nose. 

“It’s okay,” He soothes you. 

You look up at him, your eyes still shimmering with tears. 

“Is he okay Joon?” You are scared to hear the answer.

“Yeah, he’s okay,” Namjoon nods. 

“O thank god.” You let out a relieved and shaky breath. 

“He is in the hospital though, he broke his arm, and bruised a couple of ribs,” Namjoon informs you. 

You nod at the new information, glad that he isn’t hurt too badly. 

“He’s been asking for you,” Your head shoots up, “ that’s why we have been trying to reach you.”

You stare at him for a second, your mind reeling. You try to sift through the mess that is your thoughts but as a collective, they all say the same thing before becoming a mess again. You should go see him.

“Can I go see him?” You ask timidly and Namjoon smiles, his eyes scrunching up.

“I’ll drive.” 

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.

.

The hospital room is full of whispers as you approach it. You’ve never been in this hospital before so Namjoon had to lead the way. You follow him cautiously into the room stopping in the doorway. Yoongi is asleep on the bed, the rest is sitting around the him, only Jin and Hobi is missing but you guess they’re at the cafe.

“Maybe I should try to call her again.” Jimin whispers. 

“Jimin, maybe she just needs more time, you didn’t see her that night, she was so scared” Jungkook tries to deter him. 

“Yeah but Yoongi hyung isn’t going to stop asking for her, so we should just keep trying,” Jimin replies.

“I don’t know if she’ll come Jimin, she’s even been avoiding us,” Taehyung interjects. “Jin and Hobi hyung says they haven’t seen her in the cafe for weeks.”

At this point, you feel it’s a good time to make your presence known so you clear your throat. 

Everyone’s attention swivels to you, except Namjoon who is just gathering his jacket. 

“Y/n you came?” Jimin sounds like he is unsure about it. 

“Yeah, Namjoon found me and told me what happened.” You explain sheepishly, you shrink a bit under their stares. You’ve been ignoring them and they know that, they must think you’re an awful bitch. 

“ I’m sorry,” you blurt it out, afraid that if you delay it you’ll chicken out. “I shouldn’t have ignored you, I was just going through a lot.” You move further into the room, before continuing, “I know it’s not an excuse, but…”

“Y/n, it's okay,” Jimin interrupts your rambling. You shut your mouth frowning at him, why do they all look so forgiving. 

“Jungkook told us what happened,” Taehyung explains, but your frown deepens.

“I didn’t tell him what happened,” You stare at the boy in question. “How did you know?” 

He gulps under your stare. “Well, I didn’t exactly know but when the accusations against that guy came out, we put two and two together.” He shrugs, waiting for your response. 

Your mind reels, you feel embarrassed that they know, but truthfully you’re glad you don’t have to tell them what happened. But them knowing also means that the sleeping man on the bed probably knows as well.

“We’re sorry you had to go through that Y/n,” Namjoon says, comforting you, clearly speaking for them all because everyone nods, looking at you with sad eyes. 

“Thanks,” You nod in acknowledgement, “ I”m uhm…working through it.” You bite your lip not really looking at them. 

“Does he know?” you gesture with your head towards Yoongi. You look at them one by one while they shift uncomfortably. 

“Yeah, we told him,” Jungkook confirms and you merely nod. You should have known they would tell him.

“ Yeah he was angry,” Namjoon reminisces, you frown at him, “ We had to stop him from hunting the guy down.” 

“Really?” You tilt your head a bit to the side in confusion. 

“O yeah, we had to save Namjoon’s bonsais because he was screaming and throwing everything around,” Taehyung informs you and your eyes go wide. 

He screamed and threw things. You can’t believe it, in all the time you’ve known Yoongi he has never raised his voice, even when you were screaming at him, he never screamed back. You can’t even imagine it. You bite your lip in thought, looking at the sleeping man. 

“Come on guys let’s give her some space,” Namjoon says to the other three, shepherding them out of the room. You give him a grateful smile. He nods, giving you one in return.

Now alone you sit in the seat closest to Yoongi. You stare at his face for a while. He has a nasty cut on his lip and his cheekbone is blossoming with blue and purple hues. Yet he is still the most handsome man you have ever seen. His arm is in a cast and a sling, and the IV is pushing into his hand as he holds it at an awkward angle. You carefully take his hand, moving it so that it’s flat in yours. 

“ I’m sorry” You know he can’t hear you but you still feel like he should know. “ I’m sorry I yelled at you.” You stroke some of his fringe out of his face. “ I’m really glad you’re okay, and when you wake up you’ll probably be mad at me and I get that. But I just wanted you to know just in case I don’t get the chance to say it while we’re fighting.” 

“ You’re wrong,” Yoongi grumbles out. Ironic that those will be the first words he says to you in weeks. “ I’m not mad.” 

“Yoongi,” You gasp, “you’re awake.” He slowly opens his eyes, turning his face to you.

“Last time I checked yeah.” He smiles and you roll your eyes, but you can’t keep the smile off of your face. 

“It is so like you,” You huff out, “ Going to the extreme to win an argument.” 

“ Believe me this wasn’t my choice,” he retorts, “Besides this is technically your fault.”

You gasp. “Excuse me how is this my fault.” You can’t believe he is blaming you. 

“Because it was your week.” He smiles, squeezing your hand, and you immediately relax. 

“You are such an idiot.” You chuckle. He really is but seeing him again is making you regret ignoring him. 

He sits up, flinching but refusing your help.

“ Y/n,” He is sitting fully up right now and you look at him.

 “Hmm?” You hum showing him you’re listening.

“I’m sorry,” he is holding onto your hand tighter.

“For what?” You’re not being mean you’re genuinely not sure what he is apologising for.

“About a lot of things really.” He looks down at your hands. “ But mostly I’m sorry for not being there when you needed me to be. I hate myself for not picking up your call that night. an above all else I’m sorry you had to go through that.”He looks at you, his eyes are soft and begging for your forgiveness.

You swallow around a lump in your throat at the mention of that night. You’ve been wanting to hear this since then but now that you have, you realise you don’t really care that much. 

“It’s okay,” You look away from him. “You have nothing to be sorry for.” 

“ No, I do.” He swings his legs off of the bed so that he is sitting in front of you. The position reminds you vaguely of the one you were in, in his studio. 

“Yoongi maybe you should lie down.” You don’t think it is healthy for his injuries to sit like this. You reach behind him to find a pillow so he can lie down again. But he ignores you 

“ You know I really hated you.” You stop and stare at him. 

“What?” You are very confused, about where he is trying to take this conversation.

“ Yeah I did, you were a pain in my ass, always storming into my apartment and fighting with me,” He continues, it sounds like the words are bubbling forth like he can’t stop them.

“ And when Namjoon purposed this carpool thing I accepted because I was sure I could get you to give up, and never have to see you again. And you tried the same thing. I cursed you every time I had to go drop you off at your stupid classes or when you called me away from something important, I hated you even more.” You huff and cross your arms, is he really just going to remind you about how much he hates you.

“ But then,” He’s been staring off into the distance but now he meets your eyes. “Something changed. I don’t know how, I can’t pinpoint when it happened but suddenly calling you to come and get me wasn’t purely because I wanted to irritate you. Suddenly it was a way to see you. Of course, I didn’t admit this to myself at the time.” He shakes his head. You're frozen under his gaze waiting to hear where this is going. Your heart is beating faster.

“I was stupid, I tried even harder to ignore you, and to fight you, to hate you. But you made it so hard.” He takes your hand again, intertwining your fingers this time. “ I kept trying to find the things that I used to despise you for, but it got harder and harder to find them. I found myself being jealous of the rest of the boys.” You quirk your eyebrow up at this, not understanding. “I was jealous about how easily you talked to them, I wanted you to tell all your stories to me too, I wanted you to be as casually touchy with me too, fall into my lap when you laugh too hard.” 

He takes a breath, but when you try to say something he holds up his finger for you to wait. It’s clear he has been holding this in, and you’re honestly so entranced by him you don’t want to interrupt the story. 

“ I tried to drown those thoughts out of my brain, but the more I learned about you the harder it became.” He is leaning in closer to you. “ and I do know you, y/n. I know you hate your tennis talent because your parents made you play it. I know you prefer exactly two and a half marshmallows in your hot chocolate and that you write every poem by hand because it feels more authentic to you. I know that when you're sick you become a huge baby and that you like the colour purple because you couldn’t decide between blue and pink when you were younger.”

He is just a few centimeters away from you now, your noses almost touching. Your eyes flicker down to his mouth. You can’t believe he caught onto all these small things. The static in the air is back and you wait for his last words, waiting for what he is going to do. 

“I have been a fool Y/n,” he whispers the words, he’s so close you can feel the air on your lips. “but god I can’t keep kissing other people pretending that it’s you.”

He smashes his lips onto yours. You’re startled for a moment but then you melt into the kiss. He wants to pull away but you tangle your hands into his hair, pulling him closer. You feel him smile at your movements and he pulls you onto his lap. 

He pulls away, flinching from the pain in his ribs, and you stare at him in concern before he chuckles a bit, stroking your cheek. He doesn’t give you time to speak before he is pulling you down and kissing you again, a soft kiss. You reposition yourself, straddling him. 

You keep kissing him until you’re both out of air and even then when you pull away it is only a few centimeter. You can’t stop smiling, and you imagine you look just like him, grinning like an idiot, eyes sparkling. 

“ I’m sorry I shouldn’t have just…”

You cut him off by placing a soft, quick kiss on his mouth. 

“ I think you’ve apologised enough for one day.” You smile and he kisses the tip of your nose. 

“You know you stole my speech,” You say, and he frowns. “ I was going to say the same but you had to go first didn’t you?” 

“Is not, you’re lying.” He scoffs.

“ I am not lying.” You gasp.

“ You are.” He smiles.

“Is not.” 

“Is too.” 

“You’re an idiot.” You declare, pushing him on his non-hurt shoulder. 

“Yeah,” he nods in agreement. “But now I’m your idiot.” He grins, pulling you closer, wrapping his arm around your waist as he stares up at you. 

“Unfortunately.” You smile, leaning down. 

“Hey, that’s mean.” He pouts and you melt. That is definitely a weapon he is going to use way too often now. 

“ O hush and kiss me.” You say leaning down closer.

“With pleasure.” He smiles again before pressing his lips against yours. Your stomach explodes into butterflies. The first time you were shocked but now you can relish in the feeling of his lips on yours. They’re softer than you could imagine, and they mould perfectly with yours. You run your fingers through his slightly tangled hair. You lightly pull and he moans, causing you to chuckle into his mouth. 

He pulls away, your noses touching, smiling goofily. He looks perfect with his eyes staring into yours, his chest heaving against yours slightly out of air and his lips swollen. You’re just about to kiss him again when you hear a loud gasp behind you. 

“O my god.” You both look to the door, where Jungkook is standing with his jaw hanging open, before he groans. 

“Fuck, I owe Namjoon 40 bucks.” 

You and Yoongi look at each other a moment before you both burst out laughing.

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A/N: I hope you enjoyed, please let me know any feedback that you may have, this is my first one shot so I hope it was okay. Please consider liking and commenting. 

Love you guys 💜

More Carpool:

…..

Leaves crunch under the feet stomping over the forest floor, urgent in their tread. They have been searching for what feels like forever. They saw it, a beam of light shot straight into the night sky. They followed but it faded away too fast, so now they are scattered across the forest, searching, trying to find you. They ran into the forest mere minutes after you were dragged away when the shield fell due to everyone’s shock.

After losing the beckon to lead them to you, they decided to split up into twos, hoping that two pairs of eyes will be better than one. So far they have all been unsuccessful, and every minute that passes scrapes away at the hope they try to hang onto. 

“Hyung, what if…” Hobi’s voice breaks the silence that has been shrouding the duo. All he can think about is that the hug he gave you may have been your last, it makes him sick to think what they might find if they do manage to find you. Yoongi stops and turns, grabbing onto Hobi’s shoulders, not giving him time to finish his sentence. 

“Don’t even think about that, we will find her,”  he stares into Hobi’s eyes, “We have to find her.” He says a bit softer, he looks close to tears as if his words are meant to convince himself as well. Hobi nods, squeezing Yoongi’s shoulder in comfort. 

“Of course, we will.” Yoongi lets Hobi go, his hands shaking slightly and continues onward, deeper into the forest. His mind is stuck on finding you, he doesn’t seem to be able to think past that. 

All across the forest, seven minds are solely focused on you, your smile, your laugh, and above all how much they realise you mean to them. The silent realisation that you wormed your way into their lives and the space that you now occupy will forever be empty if they can’t find you.

On the other side of the forest, Namjoon and Jungkook are both keeping their eyes glued to the ground, trying to look for a sign that you had been dragged past. They are too focused to talk, although every once in a while one of them will crouch down, thinking they found something only to stand up again, having found nothing. In the beginning, the other one would stop and wait, but now when Namjoon bends down Jungkook merely continues walking. 

Jungkook is getting desperate. All he can think about is that he should have been there, should have tried to help you, should have been faster to hold you back. He could see what you were going to do, he saw the look in your eyes from where he was standing. It’s the same look you wore when he was poisoned. Everything is foggy from that night, but he remembers when you showed up, your gaze had frozen on him, and your eyes had gone from wide and shocked to determined. He had not been fast enough to reach you when the realisation struck him, you ran seconds after he started moving. And then when he wanted to go after you the people behind him held him back. He should have fought harder. 

“Jungkook.” His name makes him stop dead in his tracks, dragging him from his guilt-ridden thoughts. He swirls around to see Namjoon holding his fingers up, dark liquid staining them. “Blood, ” Namjoon confirms Jungkook’s suspicions. 

Jungkook doesn’t know whether to cry in relief that they found something or cry in horror at the thought of you bleeding out somewhere. Their eyes scan the ground searching for more droplets, and they soon find them.

The blood smears lead deeper into the trees, and they hurriedly follow. The urgency is weighing on them, you’re bleeding and who knows how much blood you’ve lost. They call the others, hearing the same reaction of relief and worry when they are told. Lizzy is getting healers while the rest tries to meet Jungkook and Namjoon there, wherever “there” may be.

They are led to a clearing, a small one, more like a break in the trees than a true clearing. Their eyes adjust to the added light of the moon, searching the ground for your form, calling out your name, but are met with no response. 

The clouds shift slightly and the moonlight illuminates the clearing enough to show you, laying in the middle of it. Jungkook does not think, he only rushes forward, sliding on his knees until he’s next to you, sliding into a warm liquid that he looks down to inspect. The sight that meets him makes his stomach turn. 

Blood, you’re laying in a pool of blood, and judging from how mangled and torn your body is, it all came from you. Your body is cold from the night air, and your face is pale, eyes closed. “No, no Y/n no please no.” He begs. He’s in tears now, they’re streaming down his face, as he carefully lifts up your head, turning your face towards him.

Namjoon sinks to his knees on the other side of you, tears leaking from his eyes. He doesn’t seem to know what to do with his hands as they hover over your body. Finally, he decides, he takes off his jacket and throws it over your mangled torso. He picks up your wrist, trying to find a pulse and lets out a small sigh when he finds the weak thrumming of your heart under his fingertips. 

Your eyes flutter at Jungkook’s insistent begging, and slowly they open. Both men lean over you, relieved gasps mixing with the tears. They stare at you while you look from one to the other. 

“Y/n it’s gonna be alright, help is coming okay.” Namjoon tries to soothe you afraid that you may start panicking, but you merely stare at him.

Jungkook is crying fully, staring at your pale face. He brushes the blood matted hair from it. He shifts to sit behind you resting your head in his lap, giving your neck more support.

“You’re going to be okay,” Jungkook repeats it a few times, rocking back and forth a bit, still crying, some of the tears landing on your face and he quickly wipes it away.

 You frown at their faces while both of them bend over you. Your hand reaches up to cup Namjoon’s face, the tears still streaming down his cheeks. Your frown deepens while you wipe away his tears, your hand leaving bloody trails in its wake. Namjoon grips your hand against his cheek, pressing it to his face harder. He read somewhere that it helps keep someone from passing out, however it doe not seem to be working because your eyes are getting heavy.

“No no, Y/n you have to stay awake okay.” His other hand cups your cheek now, panic in his voice, “ stay with us.” Namjoon sniffles as he stares at you slowly losing consciousness.

 Your head is still in Jungkook’s lap, who is crying too much to speak, but the sound of twigs breaking spurs him on to turn his head in the direction, screaming out for help. His scream has barely died down before the rest of the band breaks through the trees. They all stare at the scene in front of them. Your mangled body, covered by Namjoon’s jacket, head in Jungkook’s lap. Namjoon is desperately trying to keep you awake, and Jungkook is staring at them, begging them to help. 

Jin and Jimin are the first to rush forward. Both fall down next to Jungkook. You look at them both, dazed, your eyes drifting between the new faces. 

Jin falls in with Namjoon trying to keep you awake, understanding the importance of it right now.

“Hey pretty girl, you have to stay awake for us please, fight it Y/n.” His voice is a bit too high pitched giving away his panic and fear. He throws his jacket over you as well to try and keep you warm, because your lips are turning an alarming shade of blue.

“O my god, y/n” Jimin’s voice cracks when he makes it to your side, his eyes taking in all the bruises littering your body, barely visible through all the blood coating you. He puts his arm around Jungkoook and the youngest turn into his shoulder, sobbing, as Jimin continues to stare at you in horror.

“Namjoon we have to apply pressure to the wound.” Hobi’s voice comes from behind, as he makes his way over to them but stops dead in his tracks. “O” is all he can say when he realise why they haven’t done it, there is no way of knowing where it is coming from. So he instead sinks down next to Namjoon, his hand on Namjoon’s shoulder for support. 

Wordlessly Yoongi and Tae walk closer. Tae feels like he is going to be sick, his mind is reeling. This is the third time he has to see someone he cares about in pain, close to death. That is what you are now, someone he cares about and he can’t stand to look at the amount of pain you are surely in, his body aches every time he does. 

Yoongi on the other hand can’t think. His mind is blank as he stares at the others trying to help you, trying to keep you awake, he slowly walks closer as if in a daze, and your eyes meet his. Your eyes, he can always read so much of your feelings in your eyes, they crinkle up when you smile or laugh really hard, and they shimmer when you are about to cry. But now they are unfamiliar to him, they are cold and empty, not even panic that he suspected is present in them. 

You keep staring at him, and slowly you reach out your hand to him, he can’t help but sink to his knees and take it. It is full of blood but he still holds onto it like a lifeline, but you are starting to lose consciousness properly now, all the shouts and begging from the rest of the boys are not helping while your eyes slowly heavily start to close. As if in slow motion your eyes finally close and your hand goes limp in Yoongi’s. 

….

The healing house is just like they remember. The walls are still full of sigils and the crystals still float a bit too close to their heads sometimes. They all think of the unfortunate resemblance in events that brought them here for the second time. Except this time they do not have to wait in the waiting room, no they get to wait in your room. Which they are all grateful for, they don’t think they would have been able to sit in the waiting room with no way of seeing you.

The VIP room is huge, big enough for them all plus Lizzy. Couches and chairs are strewn around the big four-poster bed in the middle of the room. The bedframe is engraved with hundreds of glowing sigils. 

 Your face is still eerily pale, and your eyes are closed. There are crystals floating above you, and you are hooked up to monitors. The IV in your arm is full of different coloured liquids and every now and then a healer will enter and replace it with a different potion, trying to explain to them what this one does. They have lost track of them all throughout the night, potions for blood production, potions to speed up healing and potions to keep you asleep longer because the pain will be unbearable. The last time a few hours ago the healer told them that the current potion dripping into your veins is a pain potion, meaning that you will probably wake up soon.

Lizzy sits beside you. She hasn’t said anything. Her throat is raw. They all flinch when they think of her screams when she saw you. It was like her heart was being ripped out of her chest, and she had fallen to her knees unable to stand anymore. She just kept screaming while the healers carried you away. She only stopped when Alice finally arrived and even then the screams merely turned into sobs against her girlfriend's shoulder. Now she stands up every few minutes, adjusting your blanket or fluffing your pillow, even though nothing is out of place she keeps fretting over everything, trying to distract herself, not letting a tear drop. 

The boys are sitting all around the room. Yoongi sits by your one side, having pulled a chair closer. He holds your hand. He had to let go when the healers burst into the clearing when you passed out, right on time, but as soon as he could he returned your hand in his. You had reached out for it in those last moments and he hopes that perhaps it will bring you some comfort now as well. 

Namjoon sits next to him, trying to read to calm his nerves. He hasn’t turned a page in over an hour, mostly just staring blankly at the pages. His cheek is still covered in blood from where you had tried to wipe away his tears. Someone, perhaps Jin, had tried to wipe it away but he had yanked the cloth out of their hands, refusing to wipe away the marks. How sweet you were, he almost wants to laugh at how silly it is, you wiping away his tears in that situation.

Jungkook and Jin sit on the couch at the foot of the bed. Jungkook had cried for hours and finally fell asleep in Jin’s lap. Jin is now caringly running his hand through Jungkook’s hair, staring at the younger boy in worry. He himself had cried and his face is puffy. Usually, he would try to crack a joke to ease the tension but he can’t even think of something funny to say, he doesn't want to either. His brain is running the scene of you laying on the ground over and over again, and it makes him feel sick every time he wants to say something. 

Jimin and Tae are bunched up on the other couch, and although they are wrapped around each other they don’t speak, no one in the room does. Jimin after supporting Yoongi to the room finally broke down, falling onto the couch. Taehyung had gone straight to him, pulling him into his arms and letting him cry it out. Taehyung himself hasn’t cried once since they found you. He just stares at the wall, emotionless. 

Hobi is sitting on the floor despite the abundance of chairs. His knees are bent up into his chest, and every few minutes he looks up to check if you somehow woke up without anyone knowing. He feels drained more than anything, and he feels like he won’t even be able to even fake a smile ever again if they were too late. No one had said it but they all know they barely made it in time, and the thought of them being late makes their throats close up.

It is on one of these occasions that Hobi looks up to check on you that he lays his eyes on your awake form. 

“Y/n” he immediately jumps up, drawing everyone’s attention to you. There is a scramble all around the room to sit up and stand up to see you. You look a bit panicked, so they give you space but overall you look alert enough, to put them a bit at ease. 

You stretch out your hand slowly, the movement making you flinch as you use your arm, it trembles in the air, and you say one name in a raspy soft voice. 

“Lizzy.” You say her name in urgency. She’s by your side immediately taking a seat on the bed to be right next to you. You stare at her, your eyes not moving from your best friend’s face.  

“Hey, I’m here it’s okay” she smooths back some of the hair that’s fallen into your face. She is finally letting herself cry, and the tears slowly drop from her eyes at the relief that you woke up. 

“It hurts.” You whimper, pouting at your best friend. They all look at each other, you haven’t noticed them and they don’t want to interrupt but you’re making it really hard for them to not comfort you. Your face is twisted in pain every time you move and all Jin wants to do is force you to lay still.

“I know honey, but I’m gonna go get the healers in a second okay.” Lizzy reassures you, already starting to stand up to go get them. 

“Okay” your voice is so soft it’s barely above a whisper, but you catch onto her sleeve, holding her in place. She turns around, her eyes drifting from where your hand is shakily holding onto her, to your face. 

“Did everyone make it out?” You ask, biting your lip, your voice urgent. 

“Yeah everyone is okay,” Lizzy sets you at ease, smiling a tiny bit before adding, “thanks to you.” She turns again but you refuse to let her go, nodding your head before you stare at her intensely, your eyes shimmering slightly as if you are about to cry. “And the boys?” Your hand is trembling a bit at the mention of them.  

Lizzy smiles and places her hand over yours. “They're right here.” 

Your head swings around, letting Lizzy go immediately as your attention fully turns to the seven men hesitantly staring at you. At the sight of them, you give a sob, a smile stretching over your face. 

“Hey, y/n it’s okay.” Jin takes Lizzy’s seat next to you.

You turn your head to him, and shakily nod your head before falling into his shoulder crying. He strokes your hair softly, as everyone moves closer finding a chair close by. After a minute you sit up again, wincing the entire time.

“I was so scared,” you whisper into the room, looking down at your hands, not wanting to look at them. It feels like their hearts are going to burst at your words. 

“We were too,” Yoongi takes your hand, softly holding onto it in both of his, “but you’re okay now.” 

“And you?” Your eyes scan over them and land on Namjoon’s blood-covered face. “Joonie are you okay?” You gasp out, in shock and Namjoon stares at you, before moving closer. 

“I’m fine,” he smiles softly, a bit teary-eyed “ You… uhm.. tried to wipe away my tears when we found you.” You nod and look around before spotting a damp cloth on the table, you painfully reach for it, waving away Jin’s hands trying to stop you. 

“C’mere.” You look to Namjoon holding out your hand for him, which he takes moving closer to you, sitting down in front of you. 

You softly wipe away the blood on his cheek, everyone in the room is quiet as you do so. You are focused on the task but Namjoon stares at your face. Your brow is scrunched up in concentration, and his gaze can’t help but get stuck on your cheekbone, which is badly bruised.

“There,” you declare when you’re done, smiling at his now clean face, “you know blood isn’t good for your skin.” They chuckle. 

“I’ll remember that next time.” Namjoon smiles at you, taking the cloth from you, and putting it back on the table next to you. 

“How did you find me?” You ask, looking at them one by one, waiting for the response. 

“Joon and Jungkook did, we were scattered throughout the forest when they called,” Jimin informs you, his face still looks puffy from crying, and he feels like he might continue crying at any moment. He holds it back though, they all do, you shouldn’t be comforting them. 

“You shouldn’t have been in the forest, it's dangerous.” You frown. 

“ It doesn’t matter, we had to find you,” Tae says from his spot at your feet, he looks very serious, his eyes staring into yours, leaving no room for arguing, and for once in your life, you don’t. You just nod. 

“ Do you want to sit up?” Hobi offers and you nod again, he squeezes past the others and wraps his arms around you lifting you up as Jungkook comes to help, pressing pillows behind you. Hobi can feel you shaking and softly whimpering into his neck. You’re biting your lip to try and stop the sounds from escaping. He tries to be as gentle as possible when putting you down again, he softly strokes your cheek before moving back.

“Thank you,” you say once sitting comfortably. Hobi and Jungkook nod but you clarify. 

“Thank you for finding me, I can’t remember much but I know I was bleeding a lot, if it weren’t for you I would probably have…” You trail off not wanting to say it out loud.

“ Don’t even mention it Y/n,” Jungkook says, his tone very serious, “like Tae said we had to find you.” They all look seriously at you, hoping the message sinks in. You stare at them for a moment your face soft, your eyes warm and it looks like you’re about to say something when the door opens.

“Welcome back.” Miss Lara is at the door pushing a cart filled with potions and oddities. Lizzy is following her, her face looks lighter and happier upon seeing you as if she needed confirmation that you’re still alright.

You smile at Miss Lara while she squeezes through the chairs that everyone quickly moves out of her way to give her access to you.

“You won’t be able to get rid of me that easily.” You joke, smiling at the older healer, happy to see her. She merely chuckles. “I wouldn’t have it any other way.” 

Mrs Lara checks your chart and the monitors before opening a box, removing a bottle of liquid that she wipes onto her hands. Her hands glow a greenish tint and you flinch upon seeing it.

“This is going to hurt, you know how it feels, but I’m afraid it’ll be a bit worse now.” She tries to be comforting, as she places her hand on your waist. Immediately you start cringing in pain, struggling, trying to get away from her. She merely holds you down, limiting your motion. 

Taehyung and Jungkook immediately jump up, their protectiveness over you set in, as you struggle and whimper. Your teeth are digging into your bottom lip, and they can see when the flesh gives way under the pressure and a bit of blood gushes out. They are held in place however by Hobi’s arm blocking their path, they can’t intervene. 

You squeeze Yoongi’s hand that you are still holding until it feels crushed but even then he does not try to pull away. 

After what feels like an eternity of watching you struggle and wither, you finally relax as Miss Lara removes her hands.

“That should do it, for now, I know that was unpleasant but it helps the healing process, and we want you on your feet as quickly as possible.” She wipes some of the sweat off of your forehead with a cloth. You merely nod, looking too tired to say anything. You release your grip on Yoongi’s hand slightly but he still holds yours, even though you basically crushed it, he doesn't let go.

“Now I think we should let you rest.” Miss Lara says with a pointed look at the people in the room. 

“Wait, when do I get to go home?” You are trying to sit up taller, but every movement is making you wince. “I need to handle this crisis, the media must be going crazy, I need to set everyone at ease and…” 

“Wow, hold on there sweetheart, you are going to be doing none of that for now, you are going to stay here and rest.” She is giving you a very stern look, and Jimin has to cover a laugh with a cough at your stubborn face. Your mouth is in a pout, blood still on them from biting your lip, and your eyes are narrowed, they are sure your arms would be crossed if it weren’t for the state of your body. 

“How long do you plan to keep me here?” You sound tired and yet you are acting as if you could argue for days about this.

“Your body was torn to shreds Y/n,” They flinch at the memory that Miss Lara’s words conjure up, “ You can barely move without pain right now. You can go home when you are able to at least move comfortably without the risk of bleeding out.” 

“And until then,” Lizzy cuts in, seeing you want to argue again. “I will handle the media and clean up this mess, everyone will understand.” 

“And my house?” They can see you’re only looking for excuses now. 

“We’ll take care of it” Namjoon states, everyone else nodding in agreement. They’ll talk it out later but right now setting you at ease is more important. 

You huff, your plans foiled. “Fine, I guess I’ll just have to stay here.” Your hands are fidgeting with the end of your bandage. 

“We’ll come to visit every day we promise.” Jimin takes your other hand, rubbing the back of it softly. 

“Well with all that settled, I think we should let you sleep, the medicine will kick in, in a moment.” Miss Lara says, throwing an extra blanket over you. 

They all say their goodbyes, your eyes getting heavy, they can tell you’re fighting sleep, and only when you finally fall asleep do they leave you.

Y/n’s pov

Being in the healing house sucks. You’ve been stuck in the same bed for the past week and the first time you were allowed to get up you refused to get back in bed for hours. It took Yoongi’s very good bargaining skills to get you back under the covers. 

It’s not that you don’t like being taken care of, although having to do everything the healers say is a bit of a challenge, it’s the healing house itself, you have nothing to do. Your only saving grace is the boys that kept their promise and visits every day. 

“ Listen to this one,” Jimin is seated on the bed next to you, sharing your pillow, while he reads through the magazine, “Pact members or spies, can the seven bandmembers be trusted? apparently, we’re evil spies now, that’s my favourite one so far.” 

You snort at the stupid rumour. Since the demon attack more and more rumours have been spreading, some more logical that are being investigated and some like this one that is just preposterous. The boys have been reading the funny ones to you when they happened upon them. You’ve been so bored that they try to bring as much entertainment as possible without requiring you to move too much. 

“I’m back,” Tae bursts in through the door, plastic bags in his hands. “ I brought food.” Your smile grows tenfold at the mention of actual food. 

You’ve been living off of snacks that Yoongi and Jin have been sneaking in for you. You had to promise not to say anything to Jungkook and Hobi who were taking the rules regarding your recovery very seriously. But after Yoongi saw how little you were eating of the hospital food he decided that you eating is more important than the rules, and you definitely agree. However, you got the green light to eat whatever you want yesterday and Tae took it upon himself to bring your favourites. You’re technically not allowed to eat outside food but clearly, the man now unpacking all the containers on the table next to you couldn’t care less about that. 

“Ooo what did you bring me?” You survey the food as he points to every container telling you what it is and where he got it. You giggle when he exaggerates a story and his eyes gleam at the sound. 

“And for these macrons,” he proudly displays them for you to see, “ I had to go find a dragon.” You laugh at his serious face. 

“Why would a dragon have macrons Tae?” 

“Because he has a sweet tooth y/n, don’t judge him.” He is clearly fully committed to the story and you laugh even harder, reaching for the plate with the round sweets in question. 

“Ouch!” You retract your hand, you overextended and the pain in your waist flares up badly, you grip it to try and lessen the burning sensation. At your exclamation both Tae and Jimin stop what they’re doing and look at you in concern

“Y/n be careful, let us help,” Jimin states, picking up a macron that Tae holds out to him, and gently placing it in your hand. “We’re here to help, remember?” 

And they have been helping. Every time you need something they are there handing it to you or doing it, it’s almost like they can feel what you need sometimes before you ask. You want to question it but it’s very convenient. You also should probably be putting up a fight, refusing their help all the time, and sometimes you do when they are being ridiculous, but overall you kind of enjoy being taken care of. You’ve always been the one taking care of others, at the orphanage the kids would run to you when someone bullied them or when they were sick. At the academy, you were the one that protected the younger students from the harsh older kids and now you’re literally in charge of running and taking care of all witch covens. So maybe when these seven boys are giving you their full attention you don’t fight it because you revel in it. 

You stare at the macron in your hand. There is another side to basking in their attention, the side that you’re not sure you want to think about too hard because it scares you. So you have to remind yourself that they’re doing this because they are your friends and above else this is their way of paying you back for saving them. 

“I walked into Mrs Lara on the way here,” Taehyung’s voice cuts through your thoughts. “She said she thinks you might be able to go home tomorrow.” He smiles at you, his big boxy smile that has been appearing a lot more often when he looks at you. 

“That’s great right y/n?” Jimin turns to you, joy written over his face and your first reaction is to smile back. 

“Yeah, I can finally get out of this room.” You chuckle and they agree nodding their heads, their mouths full of food. 

You bite into the macron. Getting to go home, to see Leo and sleep in your own bed, is what you’ve been waiting for. Then why do you feel so sad all of a sudden? You stare at the two of them eating and fighting with their chopsticks over a piece of food, smiling at each other like idiots. You’ll miss them when you go home. The thought of not seeing all of them the entire time makes you depressed and if you had to choose you’d rather stay in this stupid healing house forever if you could keep seeing them so often. 

“Hey, y/n are you okay?” Jimin asks. Tae is chewing, clearly having won the little fight but they both look at you concerned. 

“Yeah, I’m just a little tired.” You make up the excuse not wanting to make them feel guilty, or make them feel like they should stay with you when you go home. They share a look, you can tell they don’t completely believe you but they don’t push it either.

“Why don’t you tell me about what everyone is up to?” You ask changing the topic before they get a chance to probe into your sadness. They have been keeping you up to date about how everything is going at the estate, apparently, everyone found something to occupy themselves with when they're not working.

“O well Namjoon- hyung is still mostly in the library, he says he’s gotten quite good at navigating it but other than that he’s either in the gym or garden,” Jimin smiles a bit as he talks, “ I join him sometimes for his walks it’s quite nice.” 

“Jungkook is still exploring a lot but he is mostly in the gym, he and Namjoon have been working out a lot since they discovered it,” Tae adds to Jimin’s story, they share a look smirking and then Tae shakes his head, as if shaking an imagine from it before he continues, “ and Hobi may have discovered the boutiques in the town, he has been buying a lot of clothes.”

“You have too,” Jimin interjects, pushing Tae lightly smirking.

“Yes but I customise them.” Taehyung retorts pouting at Jimin gesturing to his pants that he clearly painted on. 

“It looks nice Tae, and you can trust me I have an amazing fashion sense.” You compliment him. Lizzy has always teased you about your love for clothes, so knowing Tae and Hobi share the sentiment is fun.

“Thank you.” He smirks at Jimin who rolls his eyes, but smiles at him a moment later.

“Anyway, Jin and Yoongi- hyung have been trying out some new cafes, I don’t know where they keep finding all the new ones,” Jimin shrugs, “Other than that Yoongi-hyung is enjoying his time off when he is not working by napping in the different rooms.” You chuckle at the thought of Yoongi sprawled out on the couches and window sills in the large house.

The door opens to let in Mrs Lara. “ Good afternoon,” she greets and casts a look over the containers of food on the table but says nothing.

“Good afternoon.” You reply, staring to unbutton your pyjama shirt to show Mrs Lara your waist and bruised torso. The two boys in the room excuse themselves already used to the routine of leaving while you’re being examined. 

“You know they all surprise me every time.” Mrs Lara speaks up, smearing salve on one of the cuts on your back. The cuts have been healing quickly due to the magic salves and potions you’ve been getting, but they are still tender and some of the deeper ones still bleed sometimes.

“What do you mean?” You flinch when she presses too hard on a bruise.

“Sorry,” she apologise, “ I just mean they are so good to you, it’s nice seeing you treated so well by someone other than Lizzy.” 

You nod, she’s known you since you started at the academy and she is very right, not many people treated you well there, Lizzy and a few other people being the exception. As you got older and your shenanigans increased, and your talent for magic came to light,  you became more popular but those admires were never truly friends.

“They are very sweet.” you agree with her. They truly do treat you differently than most people do, they never have all these expectations of you, which makes it so refreshing and calming to be around them. You really do appreciate them. And you doubt that the space they all have in your life can be filled by anyone other than them. 

“Hold on to them,” your head shoots up.

“What do you mean?” You tilt your head to the side in confusion.

“I mean not many people are lucky enough to find a person who cares so much about them, never mind seven of them.” She fixes you with a stern look, “don’t take it for granted. You nod.

“There then I am finished.” She says it loud enough that the two waiting outside can clearly hear her and not a second later two heads pop through the door.

“Can we come back in?” Tae asks, his head above Jimin’s making it look like they are stacked on top of each other. 

“Yeah, you can.” You answer giggling slightly, as they take a seat on either side of you on the bed.

“Well Y/n,” Mrs Lara draws the attention in the room to her, “I’m very happy to say that you have recovered enough to go home.” She smiles widely, and the two boys beside you cheer at the news. You smile at their excitement.

“ Of course, you still need to rest so no working,” she adds to her announcement. “ but overall you are well enough to be at home, as long as someone can help you change your bandages and reapply the potions and salve.”

Right, you start to wonder who you’ll ask, maybe you can come back here when that needs to be done. You’re going through the possibilities when Jimin pipes up from beside you, not hesitating for a second.

“That won’t be a problem, we’re all going to be there to help,” Jimin assures her, smiling. You frown in confusion at him, but he just smiles at you. 

“I have to tell the others, they are going to be so happy.” Tae says, already getting out his phone to send a text in the group chat. 

You stare at the two surprised before you break into a smile a moment later, a truly genuine smile because they are going to stay with you and more importantly they seem like they actually want to, making you feel just a bit stupid for thinking they would just leave you alone. Maybe they do care as much as you do. 

You really can't wait to go home.

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The anticipation is heavy in the air as you look to the ground, your witch mark showing itself, the antlers breaking through your scalp. You feel the moonlight on your skin, your witch mark drawing energy from it and you feel the magic rush through you as you start to sing, your voice rippling through the clearing like a wave, and when it has filled it you start to dance. The music joining in while you move, your feet leaving a trail as you intricately dance within the circle, holding your hand out to the initiates asking them one-by-one to join you. They join the dance, the song, melodies mixing through one another as their voices weave with yours. Their feet tracing their own patterns as they twist and turn.

The song is coming to a climax as you dance faster and faster, you don’t think of the movements the magic taking control of your body and mind. It leads you without fault, without faulter through the song that is slowing down, the song that is drawing to a close now. Each of you are turning on the spot, your hands reaching out above you to the moonlight, and suddenly one-by-one the initiates start falling to the ground. Your voice alone sing the last notes of the song and then you stop, your hands still held aloft.

The music continues, now building tension and holding it, the initiates are sprawled out around you and the spell is pushing down on you. The weight is almost unbearable, your own magic push back, it courses through your body, suffocating you in its struggle to hold the spell. Knowing that if you fail the teenagers laying on the ground will die. The other’s wants to step in to help you, but you push them away, you can do this alone.

You can feel the spell’s magic overcoming you and suddenly magic floods through you, your own, escaping from a place you never knew existed. It pushes the spell back, it overtakes your whole body, it tuns your blood to magic and cause you lungs to freeze. You feel this magic choke you, surging through your body, making you strain at the seams. You feel like you’re going to pass out when it all lifts. The spell recedes and you lower your arms, pushing the initiate spell into the ground. It vibrates softly underneath you for a moment.

You look to the line of lantern bearing children and you nod to them. They enter the circle, their hair whipping around them as they walk to the initiates softy harmonizing, swinging the lanterns above the initiates. The focus is on the initiates, their white ritual robes turning red. The dark colour seeping into the fabric, and when it has fully taken over the robes, the initiates’ eyes open, and glow as their witch marks appear for the first time, the ritual complete.

Music fills the clearing, now joyous and energetic while witches dance through the clearing. The voices of the watchers scattered around the rim of the clearing mix with the music. Everyone is celebrating the newly initiated members of the coven. Said members are strewn around, easily seen by their red attire, some dancing merrily, while others show off their witch marks to siblings and parents. The children in the space staring up in awe at them, their hands stretched out to touch the horns, fins, embers, and many other oddities.

You reminisce of all the times you too were the younger one. Staring up at the initiated members, you always envied them. Wishing for the day that you too can join their ranks and you always wondered what you would do afterwards. A smile quirks at your mouth at the thought. If only younger you knew what awaited her.

“Penny for your thoughts?” A voice pulls you away and you turn to find Lizzy. Her own white dress sweeping along her body, her fiery hair loose and wild. She looks free and happy and exactly how one would imagine a witch temptress.

“You did amazing by the way,” her voice is soft, and you smile at the praise, “everyone is talking about how you were able to hold the spell alone.” She blows a stray curl from her face. “they’re saying you’re one of the first witches to do so in years. But I personally think you were just showing off.” You both laugh at her words, but when you look away from your best friend’s gleeful face you see the group of people standing a little distance away awaiting for their chance to bombard you.

“Looks like they want to come say the same.” She jerks her head towards the group, and when they make eye contact with you, they take it as a sign to pounce.

Adoring eyes and praising words meet you everywhere you look. You nod and smile as you accept the compliments given to you. However, the crowdedness is a bit too much, and your body is still recovering. Your head spins a bit as you start feeling claustrophobic, people insisting you answer their questions. You look around at all the faces staring at you and when you look over their heads your eyes catch onto the seven figures. The insisting crowd forgotten as you stare at them. They’re watching the dance floor, talking to Alice and another teacher.

“Go say hi, you’ve barely had time to speak to them. I’ll handle your adoring fans for a while, besides you look as if you’re about to pass out.” Lizzy whispers in your ear and push you towards their direction. You should probably protest but you honestly don’t want to, so a bit grateful to leave the throng of people, who are now focused on Lizzy, you thread through the crowd.

Breaking through to the other side, you walk to towards the subdued space were they are bidding farewell to Alice and the other teacher. As the two walk off, the boys see you approach. You catch them looking you up and down and you assume it must be due to your witch mark still in sight. Usually, you would have retracted the antlers by now, but it is a ritual after all and they asked to come, seeing you in your full witch form is to be expected, you have to keep reminding yourself that. You also need to keep reminding yourself that they’re staring just because it is the first time they are seeing you in your robes, because the way they keep looking at you is making you think idiotic thoughts.

“I’m glad to see I haven’t scared you off.” You greet as soon as you’re in ear shot.

“Glad to see you could spare a second from your adoring fans.” Jin teases, and you merely roll your eyes and smile. “You should know all about that, now shouldn’t you.” You retort now in front of him, earning a smile from his beautiful full lips.

“And we would always spare you a second too, I promise.” He says smiling, and you smile back blushing slightly. You’re about to ask them how they found the ritual when you’re lifted up off the floor and spun around, it seems Hobi has taken it upon himself to redirect your attention to him. He hugs you tightly and giggles in your ear, as he puts you down. “You can’t just talk to Jin-hyung.” He teases. “I was about to turn around.” You laugh, “Y/n don’t lie to them, you can tell them that I’m your favourite.” Jin exclaims from behind you. You don’t even get a chance to answer before they are jokingly arguing, laughing the longer they continue.

You watch them as they laugh. They look good, and not just healthy good but handsome good. They clearly dressed up for the occasion and you appreciate the effort, you are sure the other people here also appreciate their effort. They are all wearing tight pants, tucked in shirts, not all of them fully buttoned up you may add, and jackets, ranging from velvet to ones with beaded symbols. Chokers adorn some of their necks and overall, they look jaw droppingly beautiful, but that’s not the only reason you can’t stop staring as they laugh and carry on with a conversation you can’t seem to follow although you try.

You’ve missed them, you haven’t seen them in a while, with all the preparations of tonight and the dilemma what to do with the poisoning information you’ve barely had time to sleep, never mind visit them. You do notice however that you feel better, the pain and exhaustion that accompanied you is less and less noticeable the longer you stand next to them.

“I’m really happy you stayed, it means a lot to me.” You tilt you head to the side as you smile, your nose scrunching. “Of course, you said you wanted us here after all so why wouldn’t we stay?” Yoongi asks his face a bit tilted reminding you of Leo looking at something peculiar in his cat form.

“I don’t know maybe after you saw the antlers sprout from my head, you decided to make a run for it.” You laugh but a small part of you is scared they might just do that, now that you’ve drawn attention to it.

Jungkook frowns. “We wouldn’t do that,” He looks you straight in the eye, before smiling his sweet bunny smile, “besides I like them.” You blush and his smile tug at your heart strings.

“I like the crystals.” Tae points out, referring to the crystals hung around them, the string holding them weaving between the two antlers.

“Thank you.” You nod causing the crystals to move a bit, “They came with the deal.” You state smiling proudly.

“So, a two for one sale?” Jimin asks and you stare at him as they all laugh at the joke, you join in after a moment.

“Yes Jimin like a two for one.” You say through your laughter. Taehyung throws his arm around you, “You and your antlers look gorgeous, Y/n, not to mention we found out what a lovely singing voice you have” he says, smirking at you.

“Yeah that was a surprise, now you’ll have to sing to us all the time.” Jungkook beams and you blush fiercely. He laughs even more at your blush, drawing the others’ attention to your blushing face.

“Aww Y/n are you blushing?” Namjoon teases you and you shake your head, thinking of a way to draw the attention away from you. You’re this all powerful witch, who just did something almost impossible a few moments ago and now you are a blushing mess because of these boys, hopefully the reporters covering the ritual won’t pick up on this.

The perfect excuse to get a break from the teasing comes a second later, causing you to spin out from under Tae’s arm. “What…” He stumbles without your support, turning around where you are now excitedly looking at the dancefloor.

“This is my favourite dance, I loved watching the couples when I was a kid.” You explain to them, your eyes trained on the people dancing. You miss the way the boys behind you look at each other, and your attention is only drawn away from the dance floor when a hand on your shoulder appears, the rings on it glitters in the light, and you follow the arm to its owner. Jimin is smiling at you, and you frown in confusion at him until he grabs your hand and leads you to the dancefloor. You look back over your shoulder to see the others smiling at you two, Yoongi giving you a wave and a gummy smile.

Jimin swings you around until you face him, and he pulls you closer to him. With his hand on the small of your back and your hand in his, you start to move. Jimin leads you in a fun upbeat dance following the music, spinning you around the dancefloor, your bare feet and his Chelsea boots moving in sync.

You look around at the people watching on the side, Lizzy and Alice smiles and claps along to the music. The other dancers have left the floor and is now standing watching you. You spin past the boys who came closer to watch, their faces spread into smiles, and you might imagine the little awe in their eyes. You giggle as Jimin spins you under his arm, you turn a few times before being pulled back to him. You’re chest to chest and you can’t help but look at him.

An electric current courses through you both as soon as your eyes meet. You move in perfect unison, your eyes not leaving each other, your dancing becomes more beautiful, not the look of one dancer leading another, but rather of two people moving so flawlessly, so gracefully you don’t know where one begins and the other ends.

You smile at Jimin, and he smiles back, the dance floor empty except for you, the music is building in pace, in intensity, your feet following effortlessly. The world fades away, any sound other than the music does not exist.

Jimin spins and dips you, lifts you, and pulls you closer. You stare at his eyes, they’re perfect, soft and sweet but like a tantalising pomegranate there is a tang to the flavour, just a hint, and you want to draw it out, explore it. The intensity of your stare is mirrored in his. The music urge you to move faster, a tingling sensation run down your spine. The dance is making you feel like you’re floating on air, and with a gasp you realise you are actually floating. Your feet is off the ground as you continue to dance, the music drawing to a close and as it does you return softly to grass covered dirt.

People are clapping, and sound returns as if you’re breaking through a water surface to find a huge party. Jimin and you are chest to chest, your ragged breathes causing them to rise and fall, push into each other. Your eyes blink and a smile decorates his face. You’re still staring at each other and after a moment you realise how this must look. You take a step back, out of the bubble, and you see confusion and something else cross his face, something that makes your heart clench.

So instead, you look away. Your eyes leave his for the first time in what feels an eternity, only to lock onto glowing eyes in the tree line over his shoulder. You immediately think of werewolves and bristle at the idea that they dare ruin this sacred ritual when the first one breaks through, stepping into the moonlight. Your heart stops, your brain screams for you to run, every fibre of your being trembles as you lock onto the being. Jimin is tugging your arm trying to get you to move as all hell breaks loose and the first scream of many pierce the air. The word serving as a warning that is already too late. “Demons!”

Demons, awful dark and creepy things, smoke covering where their faces would have been. Only a mouth with teeth present, their wispy arms and many legs stretch from a twisted and deformed torso. They do not walk, they crawl, the sound of bones breaking accompany their ghastly tread.

You’re frozen, staring at the ghastly figures advancing towards you. It takes Jimin screaming your name for you to look at him. “We have to go.” He sounds frantic, his voice is quivering as he stares at you, and then the demons. His voice breaks you from your trance and you nod, going with him as he pulls you back to where everyone is standing.

Lizzy meets you on the way, she looks just as terrified as you feel. “We need to put up a shield.” She’s right you need to defend everyone who is staring at you, waiting for you to make a decision. You nod.

“Jimin go find the others,” You let go of his hand. He catches your wrist as you turn. You stare back at him, and he looks like he wants to say something, but he lets go with a worried look and disappears into the crowd.

“Everyone get back, we’re going to put up a shield.” The urgency in your voice is clear and you see the volunteers step up to help, to protect their family and friends.

“We need chalk, did anyone bring.” Lizzy shouts out and she is met with silence, why would anyone bring sigil chalk to an initiation ritual.

Everyone frantically start searching but you know you don’t have time, the demons are advancing fast. So, you do the only thing you can think of.

You pick up the rock near your foot and with one swift motion you slice your hand. You hear gasps but you can not stop now. You curl your shaking hand into a fist and catch the blood. Drawing a sigil on your non-hurt palm. You take a deep breathe in, let the magic flow once more, and with a yell you fall to the ground slamming your hand onto it.

A ripple passes through the air, a line between everyone behind you and the demons. You struggle, your body is still weak from the initiation ritual, and you know if too many demons hit the shield you may not be able to hold them all back. But you feel the shield becoming stronger, as more and more people following your example. You look to the side and see Alice and Lizzy right next to you. Their faces are serious as they concentrate, the volunteers know what it might cost if the demons hit and gets hold of one of us behind the shield. But protecting the many behind us is a worthy thing to die for.

“Ophelia!” The woman’s voice pierces through the night. Everyone looks back but you already know that desperation is not because of something behind you.

You see the little girl stuck under a table too scared to move. Her little hands are holding onto the table leg, and she is silently crying, of course no one saw or heard her in the commotion to get away. And now the demons are advancing on her. You stare at her and look to the side to make sure everyone is holding the shield. Lizzy looks at you, “Y/n don’t” She yells but it is already too late.

You break from any hands that try to hold you back, you run past the shield, heading straight to the table. You slide under it, ignoring the voices yelling for you, seven voices standing out above the others.

“Come on sweety.” You hold out your hand and luckily she takes it.

Holding on tightly onto her small hand you pull her out from underneath the table, picking her up you run back to the shield, seeing people beginning to receive teleport letters. You’re almost there when you hear screams and the next moment you feel a searing pain in your calf. You fall with Ophelia in your arms. “Go Ophelia, go!” You yell at her releasing her.

You stare at her back, see her mother meet her, hug her, and hold her tight. You smile at the sight knowing you saved her.

Then you feel the skin on your stomach peel off as you’re dragged backwards. More teeth sink into your legs. You scream out, clawing at the ground to try and stop them from dragging you into the trees. The last thing you see is the boy’s screaming, crying, and fighting with all their might against the many hands holding them back from coming after you.

Hi! I'm back, I didn't really mean to take this long of a break but I have a few chapters lined up now for when the writer's block hits me again. I love hearing from all of you. Please send me feedback!

Also, any questions you may have about the characters or the world, I would love to answer them.

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